Work Text:
Izuku had appeared in the media before, obviously. There was that time after the Overhaul catastrophe where he’d given a couple statements. He knew there was articles about him after his work study with Endeavour. But UA had kept him pretty sheltered from everything, even at his work studies and internships he’d always been able to quietly step into the shadow after the fighting was done.
But now he was a real, qualified pro. Now he had no crutch, and after the war and everything else that had happened, he had figured he was sorely lacking on media training.
He knew his debut would get some attention, because every hero's debut got some attention.
But now, faced with what felt like a thousand cameras in his face and flashing lights and clamouring calls from reporters and civilians and everyone alike as he stood panting from the fight he just finished – he was freaking out. And that lack of training became a glaringly obvious issue. Every direction he looked the crowd thronged around him, shouting and chanting questions at him at such a rapid pace that he was sure they must all have some sort of speed talking quirk.
Villains he could face, with villains he could clench his fists and kick at until they were down, little talking needed. With rescued civilians he knew what to do, he could put on that reassuring face just like All Might always did and tell them it would be all okay.
This was an entirely different beast, and Izuku felt his heart in his throat and his body wouldn’t move. This was not something he could punch or strategize his way out of. The attention was overwhelming and all encompassing.
The camera flashes blinded him, paparazzi crowing to get one lick of attention. He couldn’t see where he was going, he couldn’t think of what to do and his heart thundered loudly in his head.
“Deku, Deku! Can you tell us about yourself?”
“Deku what are your goals as a hero?”
“Deku are you aiming to top the billboards?”
Izuku smiled and laughed and waved. HIs jaw wouldn’t move. The words he tried to force out of his throat snagged somewhere deep in the pit of himself and started to bundle together into a huge writhing ball of anxiety.
His anxiety had gotten better, since middle school at least. He thought it had.
In the end he managed to force out some excuse about being needed elsewhere and took off.
__________
A bunch of pro heroes going out for lunch was always likely to garner some attention. Pro hero Dynamight, Deku and Uravity out all at once? Impossible to ignore. Which is obviously why they had disguised themselves.
They’d been in the field for a little over a year now, and they were all climbing the charts at record pace given that they were UA alumni and a part of ‘that’ class. So, it was no wonder that people recognised them, though Izuku still wasn’t used to it.
Partway through a heated debate over who would win in a fight between All Might and a thousand lions – someone yelled out in that excited tone which Izuku could relate to. The tone that meant they recognised a hero. Which was made even more obvious by the words they spoke;
“Holy shit is that Deku?” The person shouting in question was a kid, looking around middle school age – with a pig mutation and stars in his eyes.
He was also, unfortunately, surrounded by a group of friends who’s heads immediately whipped around to look. Like they were sleeper agents and Deku was their activation code. Izuku felt hundreds of pairs of eyes on him in an instant, in the middle of the crowded shopping mall.
“And Dynamight and Uravity with him?” Another person said, a crowd quickly forming around the trio much to his dismay.
Izuku pulled his beanie further down over his head and gave his best smile. Ochako’s hand twitched out to comfort him, but he shook his head, he didn’t need their relationship exposed on top of the attention they already had.
She pulled her hand back, but the concerned look remained. Izuku waved off her concerns with his best ‘Deku’ smile and turned back to the quickly gathering group.
Wow that was a lot of people. He had really been hoping for a nice, simple, laid back hang out with his friends. Apparently, fame was going to get in the way of that.
Not one to disappoint his fans – though, and he felt bad about this, he really wished on this occasion they weren’t there; he took the first pen and notebook he saw and signed it.
Then another which was thrust in his face – and another after that. Izuku found himself spinning around signing as much as he could.
He said what he could, he complimented people on their outfits, thanked them for their support. Ignored his heartbeat getting faster and the way the people kept building around them increasingly until it felt entirely suffocating, the eyes on him bearing down on him, a hundred judgements all at once piercing his back.
Despite this, he didn’t want to disappoint his fans. He should stay and sign everybody’s autograph who wanted it – but oh god- that was a lot of people. He didn’t even know if he could get out if he tried and he could feel his hands trembling and he was probably giving out awful signatures now because his vision was so blurred he could barely see and-
“OI, CLEAR OUT.” Kacchan said in that voice which wasn’t explicitly yelling but was loud enough and intimidating enough to make people take a step back anyway. He tsked, and started marching forwards, clearing a path through the crowd.
Izuku saw the gap in the crowd, the rising sea trying to swallow him and the parting giving him a chance to breathe.
Izuku threw back a thank you, for good measure, but was busy sprinting across the centre of the floor and trying not to think about all those eyes on him, all those people staring at him.
It was only when they were situated in the corner booth of a secluded coffee shop did he finally feel like he could breathe again.
“Thanks, Kacchan.” He smiled a little up at the other man, who was slouched in the bench across from him with a bored, or annoyed looking expression. It was always difficult to tell his expressions apart.
“Tch, I was getting bored of those extras begging for attention.”
Ochako rolled her eyes at Kacchan and rested her head on Izuku’s shoulder. He let himself relax, and his muscles untense.
“I really don’t understand how you rank so highly when you’re such a miserable ass.” Ochako mused, running her hands through Izuku’s curls – laughing good naturedly as she teased.
____________
“’Chako I – I – I can’t do this -” Izuku wheezed out between short quick breaths.
He was on the couch, not quite sat and more so curled into a ball and putting their apartment at risk of flooding with how much he was crying. No matter how many fights he survived, battles he won – he didn’t think he’d ever kick the Midoriya tears as a habit. Even after three years as a pro.
Ochako sat across from him, perched on the coffee table. Brown eyes all full of concern, trained intently on him. She set a hand on his shoulder, squeezing tightly, as with her other she encouraged his hands away from his face.
“Izuku, I know it seems scary, but you’ll get through it. You just need to breathe right now okay? Just try to copy me -” She took a deep breath in, letting it fill her lungs and lift her shoulders.
Izuku copied as best as he could. In and out, in a steady rhythm, until he could feel the world righting itself a bit more in his vision. Panic still gripped every edge of his being, but he could breathe – at least better than he could before. Not hyperventilating was probably a more accurate way of putting it.
He took another juddering breath.
Tomorrow, well – today more like, given it was past 12, he had to stand in front of a huge crowd, on Live TV, and give a speech. He knew his speech so well that he mumbled it in his sleep. But every time he closed his eyes and imagined that moment, he could just see it.
Cameras flashing from every direction, blinding him. Thousands of eyes staring at him like they were expecting something great. The pressure of it felt like it was all around him, leering at him from behind with sick glee.
He’d been a pro for three years now, he should be used to this. And yet. He wasn’t. It still made him want to cry.
“Izuku” Ochako said softly, lifting his attention away from the thoughts inside his own head back towards her gentle face of concern. “Tell me what you’re thinking.”
Izuku swallowed, thickly, and tried to rub some of the red puffiness out of his eyes now tired from tears. He leaned his head back on the couch.
“I’m afraid- that I’ll - I don’t know, mess it all up. That everyone will realise that I’m a just some worthless Deku I- I..” He struggled for a minute, trying to find the right words. “I think I’m so used to being ignored, that having so much attention just makes me assume something must be wrong and just- panic.” The truth tasted bitter on his tongue. No matter how long had passed since he was quirkless, the effects of those years remained like a shackle.
She nodded, understanding, moving to sit by him and pull him close into a hug.
“The anticipation is always the worst part – the build-up. I used to do theatre when I was little y’know and waiting for the curtain to open and go onstage was always sooo terrifying.” She laughed, and it even got a little chuckle out of Izuku imagining little Ochako nervously waiting in the wings. “But when you get out there- you just forget about it all and put everything into your performance. I know you’ll do amazing ‘Zu, because you are one of the kindest – most thoughtful and lovely people I’ve ever met.”
Izuku sniffed, eyes still gleaming from the tears.
“You’re only saying that ‘cos you’re my girlfriend-”
“I am absolutely not – only the best for me you know,” She winked, “I wouldn’t have asked you out if you weren’t the best and kindest person I knew.”
She said is so simply, and so matter of factly, that Izuku had to stop himself bursting into tears again for an entirely different reason.