Chapter Text
You had been with the Winchesters for a while. Two years, two years that went flying by. Sadly, your paths crossed when your family had been attacked by a shapeshifter. Not having much of a family around, it killed your parents, your only support at the time. It had been quick at the very least, or so you wanted to think. The thing wanted only one thing and one thing only, to get the inheritance money. At first you barely noticed a change, your mother being worried about work at what not, but you realized that your father being absent for more than a month couldn't just be a work trip.
Not long after that, your mother and you filed a missing person's report. Two men showed up at your house, saying that they were with the local police investigating a series of mysterious disappearances. These disappearances were almost always in well off families like yours and it didn't end there, fifty percent of the time the rest of the family disappeared a couple of months after, with all their money. You were terrified of who was behind it. Nothing seemed to match. You were well off but didn't flaunt it much. No cars, no expensive vacations, only a moderately nice house in a moderately good neighborhood. The money had been an inheritance thing. Well managed, it would have served to give your parents and you a pretty uncomplicated life.
That wasn't going to happen anymore. With the disappearance of your dad, you noticed some strange changes in your mom. At first, you considered it normal, it was her husband after all. She started to search every inch of the house trying to find paperwork, but who wouldn't worry about their money knowing that there was probably someone after it? Then the long nights out turned into a new normal. After you begged her not to, she continued. Despite your efforts your mom started feeling like a stranger that you had to live with. Then it happened, you got kidnapped.
It was dark and you were in your room a little after 9:00 p.m. You were watching a comedy movie that wasn't really entertaining but kept you from thinking too hard and these days that's what you really needed. Suddenly, you heard a little crack outside your door.
- Mom?- you asked nervously. She hadn't been home at night for like two weeks straight.
The house cracked again, not too uncommon, but loud enough for you to come out and investigate. The corridor was empty and dark. Using your phone you lit the way ahead, everything seemed normal, the photos on the walls, the staircase, the stack of papers on the dining room table and all over the living room were normal now for you too. You went to the kitchen not daring to check outside and as you were grabbing some orange juice from the fridge someone hit you hard on the head, knocking you unconscious.
It was a while until you woke up, the lights were dim, not hurting my eyes, but the smell was weird, humid and concentrated, the place cold. You couldn't move, the coldness impregnated your clothes as if you had been there a long while. You were in a chair with your hands behind your back, tied. You were struggling to get free when you started hearing footsteps. They were slow and deliberate. There wasn't a lot of light but a circle lit the space you were in, making everything else almost invisible.
Then someone spoke, and your blood went cold.
- You were such a good girl, even with everything that happened, your daddy disappearing, your mom going out every day god knows where... You were simply just gonna accept it.- Your mind went a million miles per minute. You thought he was dead, he wouldn't just leave you like that and, now, you could hear him. You wondered if you were going crazy, if it was just a nightmare and if you only had to wake up.
- I mean your daddy wasn't that easy to kill but your mommy? A total nightmare if you ask me. For a suburban family you all have been pretty difficult to kill.- Then the voice stepped into the light revealing your father's face so close to yours it made you gag, there was something in his expression that you hadn't seen in all your years alive... something evil, uncontained and filthy.
- Nevertheless, you have been good enough, I wondered if you would be as hard to...- He trailed off, a rustling sound in the distance told you, you two were not alone. A deep voice echoed from the dark.
- Leave her alone, you nasty thing.- The voice sounded angry and closer than it seemed at first.
In a heartbeat, you had a knife to your neck, panting, you could feel the steel digging lightly into my skin enough to leave a mark, not enough to draw blood.
- What are you gonna do Winchesters? Kill the girl? I don't think so... Unless you enjoy killing more than I thought. Maybe we can arrange something...- He trailed off again and suddenly, you felt something wet and warm trailing down your back. Your hands sprung free and you stranded up instantly, turning around, you could see my father bleeding out with what appeared to be a silver knife going through his heart. A tall man stood next to him. He had brown longish hair parted in the middle and bright hazel eyes that looked at you with pity, his hands covered with blood.
You screamed as hard as you could until you felt a sharp pang in the back of your head for the second time that day.
****
Two years had passed since then, your life completely undone. After that the boys had shown you the bodies of your parents, how they had been tracking the shapeshifter. They told you about how it had disguised itself as your mother, how in the night it had been trying to empty every bank account as your father. They told you about the monsters in the dark. Since then you haven't been able to look back; you were only a loose end for the creature.
The boys had been your saving grace, taking you under their wing, they had taught you all they knew. Now you know how to hunt, how to do your research, hell, they even taught you how to drive. You wouldn't be here without them. That is why this felt so wrong. You haven't been able to tell when it started. This feeling. But you could pinpoint exactly when you couldn't deny it anymore.
Sometime between the long nights at crappy motels and long hunts you were at a bar with the brothers. You three nursing beers when it happened.
- Princess, you aren't saying much after that vampire nest success, even I am impressed.- Dean said flashing me a big smile.
- Yeah, it was amazing y/n, especially how you stopped the female mate and her friend. I think I've never seen anybody stick two vampires at once.- Sam looked genuinely amazed at your prowess.
The thing is that you were pretty bummed out about the whole thing, you had hoped the vampires would relent and actually stop drinking blood. You had talked to one of the vampires that assured you that they were trying to quit it. In the end it all had been a bad ploy to give them enough time to skip town.
- I'm sad, actually. I just hoped it would go another way completely.- You said looking at your beer for a moment too long.
- Oh, y/n, you are too much like Sammy here. It is not your fault they were full of shit. Sometimes there is only one thing you can do.- Dean said a bit somberly.- Anyway, how do we plan to celebrate? A game of pool? Nah, too basic, maybe we should actually go out.- Dean grinned at you.- It has been ages since we've gone to anything else than a filthy bar in the middle of nowhere.
- Since when do we go out? I think I've never actually gone to a club the whole time I have been with you guys. No offense, but you don't seem like the club type.
- I assure you we only go to clubs once in a blue moon. I am worried that Dean is suggesting it, it means he is restless and I don't know if I am prepared to deal with him being drunk out of his mind.- Sam said playfully.
Dean puffed his chest out.- You talk as if you never had a great time going to the club with me.
- Maybe once or twice. Either way, I think y/n should decide since she killed it tonight.- Sam drank the rest of his beer. Realizing that you had little beer to go on you made up my mind.
- Let's go, the club is waiting for us.
It was the perfect time for you to stroll into the club. The speakers were blaring with some new pop song that was everywhere, the people were dancing to the beat and the air was filled with promising electricity.
-Guys, I am gonna go get the drinks,wait for me here.- you said quickly moving to the bar and merging with the dancing bodies around you. You grabbed two strong beers for the boys and a vodka tonic for you, for a change. The air was still filled with that promising electricity that a night out normally has, invigorated, you went back to where the boys were. Sam hadn't moved an inch, looking a bit out of place. Dean was nowhere to be found. You took a big gulp of your drink and then gave the drinks to Sam who gladly accepted them. Without missing a beat you started moving to the rhythm of the song as best as you could, you didn't know the song so it was awkward. Sam gave you an amused smile.
Suddenly, the song changed to one that you knew very well: Help, I'm alive by Metric. As the first verses started to blare through the speakers you started not to care about the people around you, happy to be dancing.
They are gonna eat me alive, can you hear my heart?
Beating like a hammer, beating like a hammer.
You were dancing to the beat, floating away in-between the people, sweaty arms colliding with you, as much as I was with them, moving as one. You had drifted apart from Sam, now, moving in circles around the dance floor.
I tremble they are gonna eat me alive.
If I stumble they are gonna eat me alive.
You were having the time of your life until you saw them, swaying to the music. Dean and a dirty blonde were as close as you could get in a public space. His lips were glued to her neck, his hand in the small of her back. You felt a big pang in your stomach, rage deeply seated in your core. Looking away, you tried to return to where Sam was, the song still playing loudly.
If my life is mine, why shouldn't I do it?
Your chest felt like an open wound, not understanding your feelings very well, you tumbled still in Sam's direction. Why did I feel like this? He was like a brother to you, the same as Sam was. You hunted together, researched together, and ate together. You couldn't let these feelings surface in fear of what it would do to your relationship with the brothers.
You finally arrived at the table where Sam was. He was simply drinking his drink and listening to the music with his eyes closed. You gripped the table in an effort not to be dragged away by the crowd again. He looked at your face and saw something wrong with my expression because he asked loudly- Are you okay?
Were you okay? You didn't think so, your stomach was still in knots while your heart felt like raw meat. But you couldn't tell that to Sam so you nodded strongly. He unconvincedly handed you your drink. You smiled at him brightly, that was the solution. If you couldn't think you couldn’t think about what you had seen. Your mind went in circles: Dean, Dean, Dean. You chugged the vodka tonic and took what was supposed to be Dean's drink, having a sip, Sam looked at you weirdly. You were feeling a little humming inside your body, the songs becoming more technoish. You practically dragged Sam away from the table, you needed someone or something to distract you. You could tell that Sam had been drinking his fair share while he was by himself. Tumbling into the dance floor he looked at you, his eyes animated, you danced together for what felt like a small eternity, your beers becoming empty quicker than what you would have liked.
Sam stumbled slightly against you, smelling like fresh shampoo and a hint of sweat.- Should we search for Dean? I am wasted.- You were pretty drunk yourself so you ignored your churning insides and went searching for the other brother so you could go to the motel. Without luck you couldn't find him, stepping outside of the club you felt the cold breeze on your body giving a pause to the racing thoughts inside your head. From my right you heard an exclamation.
- Fuck him, he ditched us. I am gonna kill him tomorrow.
You didn't say anything. You knew why he had ditched you. The dirty blonde was his beauty for the night. Looking at Sam he had an apologetic look, then his brows furrowed.
- Are you okay, y/n?
-Yes, I had too much to drink, I think.- you tried to shoot a sloppy smile in his direction but he still seemed unconvinced.- Anyways, we should head back to the motel.
It would be a long thirty minutes until you reached the motel. You had no intention of talking whatsoever, the alcohol making you sleepy already, and the pit in your stomach making every interaction uncomfortable. You tried not to think about Dean whatsoever but your mind felt glued to their bodies moving. Sam, of course, felt that was the time to talk.
- Did you have a good night after all, y/n?- his pace was slow to accommodate me, his movements sluggish and uncoordinated because of the alcohol.
You felt the strong urge to vomit that second, sprinting to the nearest patch of green you could see. You vomited right into someone's bushes.
- Oh my god... - You could hear Sam saying behind me. Slowly two gentle hands came to hold your hair and then the second wave of vomit hit.- I guess no more drinking for you, y/n, like ever.- A soft chuckle came from behind you, moving you slowly. You finally felt like it was over and said so to Sam.
-Okay, but we have time, tell me if you feel bad again and we will stop.
Sam was always so nice to you that you wondered if he felt something towards you. You shaked your head, and told yourself it was impossible. The Winchesters were several ligues above you, and on the verge of being too old for comfort.
- I am glad you are here Sam, the walk home would have been much worse without you.- Sam walked a little bit closer to you.
- Dean is an asshole, at the end of the day, this was his idea. I am sorry, y/n.- Sam looked at you with his puppy eyes sending a shiver down your spine.
- Nevertheless, I am glad you are here.- The silence turned comfortable between you two, making the walking home much more manageable. You were sure that you could bury your feelings deep down. Maintaining the easy camaraderie between you and the brothers. Besides Sam was always there for you, walking alongside you, you could hear his steps growing more sure and steady as time passed by. It looked like he could manage everything, whatever it was, lots of alcohol or a pack of werewolves. It felt like he was always ready to defend you and his brother.
- Why are you looking at me so strongly?- Sam said.
- Oh, I just wondered if you have to style your hair every morning or is it a sleep beauty kind of thing.- you said mockingly. Sam snorted.
- If you weren't so drunk I would push you into the bushes again. Besides, we are very close to the motel now. I wouldn't want to risk having to rescue you.
- I mean today I was doing all of the rescuing, so I don't know what you are talking about.- you said easily, knowing that you didn't flaunt it as much you should.
- Isn't it true?- He said looking at the stars for a second, he smiled at me brightly.- Well, that's the motel, be grateful that you don't share a room with Dean right now.- your stomach fell to the ground as he said that.
- You can sleep with me you know, we can ask for a spare. You said unsure. You had never slept with the brothers, always maintaining your distance.
- That would be awesome, thanks, y/n.-Sam said, relieved to not have to wait outside in the cold.
You accommodated yourselves in your beds, Sam comically being too large for his bed and having to put a chair at the end to make it bigger.
- Good night, y/n.
- Good night, Sam.
The room was silent until little snores started coming from the younger Winchester. You were sure that as long as you had Sam you could face anything even if it meant hiding your feelings forever.
***
Present day
A year had passed since then and you were caught up in another case, what should be a simple salt and burn. But all of you were going crazy over it, you were sure who had done it. You three believed the barber in the painting was guilty, but you already burned him and the painting seemed to keep coming back.
The problem was that tonight was the night...
Tonight, another family would come to their untimely death if you weren't able to finally send him to the other side. Sam and Dean were guarding the house while you were knee-deep into the town records, trying to find anything that pointed towards a piece of him that may had been buried somewhere else as punishment, maybe his blade as keepsake in the local museum or, hell, even a fake pinkie would do the trick at this point.
You went to the car as the city hall closed, empty handed. What you didn't know at that point is that Sam had received a call from that pretty dark haired art historian that worked at the auction house, informing him of another part of the story: the little girl had been adopted after their parents died mysteriously and, what you didn't know either,
is that following the screaming from inside the house with no weapons was a big, big mistake.
The door was surprisingly open but you could hear a deathly silence inside. As you entered the house the door closed behind you with a bang. It chilled you to the core. Your phone rang and you picked it up immediately.
- Y/n? Where are you? We are by the city hall and it closed an hour ago.- your blood ran colder than ever. You almost couldn't breath, You tried to clear your throat, your voice strangled.- I am at the house. Dean, I thought you and Sam were inside, the door was open...
- You are at the house?!??! Get out, get out. It's the girl, the girl did it she killed her parents and then their adoptive family leaving herself for last. Sarah found something in the newspaper...- The line went dead and you heard a sharp sound coming from the living room.
You bolted to the kitchen searching for the salt, and miraculously found it very quickly, putting it in every door and window. The spirit didn't like that, making the room shake hard. You did the only thing you could do, spread the salt around you keeping you safe. The spirit went quiet, feeling uneasy, you looked around yourself for a way out of the house. You checked every door, mysteriously closed down for good. Suddenly, the floor cracked right where your salt circle was, a trapdoor opening. The salt trickled down and you screamed as something pushed you against the door breaking the glass.
The little girl was right in front of you, dark eyes making her look monstrous. Unexpectedly, the door opened and a familiar figure shot in the little girl's direction.
Sam sprinted towards you and kicked down the kitchen door that went outside. You were then being carried to the back garden of the house.
- Are you okay?!?- Sam roared.
You heard a big explosion coming from the house, flames barely visible from where we were standing. The spirit was gone.
- Look at me, are you okay?- Sam asked more calmly this time.
- Yes, yes, you arrived just in time...- Before you could finish you were being enveloped in his arms, his shampoo and the smell from his jacket being so characteristically Sam's.
- For a second there you worried us. Don't do it again.- Sam pleaded.
You hugged him tighter- I wouldn't dream of it. By the way, how did Dean kill her? Wasn't she cremated?
- Sam gave me a beaming smile- I remembered what Sarah told me when we went to the auction house and Dean started talking about the creepy doll. The doll's hair could be made from the child's hair. After that Dean and I parted ways.- You felt a familiar pang in my stomach, but instead of showing it you smiled as much as you could to Sam.- Where is the family then?- you said.
- Sarah was able to convince them to go before anything happened.
-Thank you, that was a close call, I shouldn't have entered but I wasn't thinking straight. I thought you two were in danger.- you said apologetically.
- Well, before entering another ghost-hunted house you should, I don't know, give us a call.- Sam said playfully.
After that you reunited with Dean. The next morning you talked and decided to take it easy after this case for a couple of days. It had been a while since you were able to actually enjoy yourselves in a town this big, it even had a bar that didn't suck.