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The Bat, The Cat and The Bird

Summary:

Selina Kyle, who has taken a new job in Blüdhaven, is determined to help this caller design a cake for their kid. Bored out of her mind, there isn't much else to do. And he at least seems to try make an effort, meaning he can ´t be *that* bad. So she sends him on a mission, find out more about the child, call her up if he finds anything… Simple, right?

Just that that turns into daily calls, and then into something more. Minuscule things, really, but perhaps Selina can finally use this as a chance to find some peace and leave behind what cannot be hers.

...But, of course, nothing ever goes as planned.

 

Or alternatively: Fuck Aesop

Notes:

Bruce and Dicks relationship as well as yk their way of being around each other are taken from a lot of old 50s comics, as well as Batman and Robin: Year One.
Selina is mostly taken out of the movie and the Arkham verse surprisingly, since readcomiconline is DOWN FOR FUCKS SAKE AND THERE IS ONLY ONE RUN MY LCS HAS FROM CATWOMAN I AM GOING INSANE

(See the end of the work for more notes.)

Chapter 1: Prologue

Notes:

Hello! Long time no read ig! Literally been through some of the worst shit in my life since I last been on here which is lwk crazy to think abt. Anyway, the entire fic is already written and only needs to be edited! I will add tags as I go along, though I must say that not because I dont know what will happen, but rather because i dont know what to tag it as haha. Updates will vary.

Hope someone out there will enjoy.

Chapter Text

13.08.20XX

 

 

It´s not that Selina hated her new job. Not exactly at least. Working for a bakery in Gothams sister city had never really been a big dream of hers, but having any dreams at all is too expensive anyway. When she first saw the advertisement, she hadn ´t quite expected to be taking calls and documenting new orders eight hours a day. In theory this sounded quite relaxing, just gotta take a bunch of phone calls; what could possibly go wrong?

 

Everything.

 

Everything could always go wrong.

 

Ranging from ruthless flirts to weird threats to a bunch of people asking for some guy named Jerry, who apparently used to own this number before moving out of this absolute shit hole of a place. If it weren't for the sheer stupidity of humanity proven within a single conversation, Selina would find this job rather entertaining. Getting paid for hours and not for the total of orders taken in this job basically meant getting to talk to the weirdest of the weirdest for a living. The salary wasn't the best but still enough to afford all primitive functions. Surprisingly enough, money appeared to be the least of her problems. Indeed, the rising prices paled next to the pain brought by the disappointment this city offered. Bludhaven was all bright colors and all, yet it´s crimes were no better than Gothams, if not worse due to the lack of men in Bat costumes kicking ass on the streets.

Vengeance… she had tried her best not to think about him, tried her best not to linger on the front pages just to relive those last few moments full of doubt as she passed the Bludhaven entry sign.

But it was no use. Her Catwoman suit was currently rotting somewhere in her closet, the memory and feelings still too fresh to shake off. And she had tried. Hard. The flat she occupied was even split with this one cute guy who'd invited her to share all expenses. Which sounds like a dream in theory. In practice, it was no more than that. A dream. Splitting the bill, no more. Talking to the man was a difficult task in itself, especially since he was constantly high. At least she desperately hoped he was, the chance of this being his default behavior appeared even sadder.

So, all in all… Nothing too spectacular. When bidding goodbye to Vengeance she had talked about fun, though that seemed to be quickly left behind when faced with grim reality.

'Cause in the end, she ´d always come back and… sit there. Write orders for the important people in the back, deliver a pastry if necessary, talk and sell something in the front in the rare case somebody actually did go walking into their shop for their scarce morning goods. Maybe some dollars would accidentally find their way into her purse, and some jewelry too while she was at it… But that was also just kind of it. There were still crime bosses of course, the city was full with those, but she could not just walz in there and play with powers she didn‘t know.


Out in the streets, she seemed to be even less than „Catwoman“. No, not even that she got to keep. Instead she was laughed at, for she was no more than a woman in a latex suit. A nobody trying to be somebody. The fact that most crime bosses were long living generations of families did not make her stance any more bearable. One had to work for these absolute morons of men in order not to risk stealing from them. And the only thing she may receive out of that fiasco would be death.

So, with one of many sighs leaving her throat, Selina went through her hair again before getting back to work. It‘s gotten longer since last time she saw Vengeance. How long had it been already?

...there was no use thinking about it was there?

…Though it also wasn‘t like her work offered much of a distraction nowadays.

 

 

But, believe it or not, that day happened to be different. Terribly so. Life changing, if you will.

Not once in her career did she pick up the phone, reciting the typical „You ´ve reached Bludhavens bakery corner, how can I help you“ just to be met with a deep mumble, stating: „Blüdhaven.“

 

„Excuse me?“

Oh, little did she know she was in for a ride.