Work Text:
“You’re just a whiny half assed jerk!”
His lips were far too fast, he could not stop what fell out. Nor could he take back what he had already said. The boy standing in front of him seething in confusion and offense to this unexpected outburst from someone that was supposed to be his friend.
He was none the wiser to the internal conflict that waged war inside karmas chest, in his head and heart. The revolting thought of being chummy with Nagisa sickened him to his stomach. The sweet tingly feeling that erupting down his spine at the thought of doing despicably cheesy things with Nagisa. When such thoughts plagued his mind he couldn’t help but be so incredibly pissed off.
At Nagisa, and himself perhaps…
Karmas hand shook with soemthing he knew all to well as he grasped the front of Nagisa’s cardigan. The one that’s fit him well, now stretched out under his fist, hoisting Nagisa off the ground a few inches.
But in a split second, the legs that lay dangling flung up in quick urgency.
The snakes charged and wrapped its body around his neck.
“I’m not a whiny half assed jerk!”
His voice rasped through the crisp autumn air but to karma, all he heard was ringing from the fear that wracked through his body that was being pulled off balance. Karmas eyes widened at the sudden pose of defense. The reaction unexpected but not unwarranted.
“You think you’re so great don’t you Nagisa? That you’re so much better than any of us huh?!”
Karma was pulled down to the ground by Nagisa.
“I don’t think that!”
“Bullshit! You stride over here like you’re some hot shot, suggesting that we throw away all our hard work just so you can have what you want!” Karma pulled Nagisa up and slammed him down on the ground he was once straining against.
Nagisa grunted and tightens the lock his legs had around karmas neck.
“That’s not true! None of us want Koro Sensei to die! He’s helped all of us in so many ways- he got our grades up! He took us to the movies! We used to be the end class! You’re saying that all that was for nothing!?”
Karma scoffed, his hand pulled back in a tight fist, ready to punch the daylights out of that stupid pissed off expression he wore that he hadn’t ever seen on Nagisa’s gentle features before now.
His blue eyes raging with an invisible fire that seeked to scorch all of Karmas being. His rosy cheeks flared in anger, brows furrowed.
His fist cocked and shot with force… only to be stopped by his fellow classmates holding him back. Pulling the two off of eachother.
The commotion ceased as the teachers intervened… and the paint ball war was waged.
Each student took their own side respectively, to kill… or to not kill. That was the big question after all. Karma and Nagisa were the first to take their stance on the obvious side they’d pick.
Students changed into their specialized uniforms that were built for their assassination missions, meant to be worn as they worked together… now used to fight against eachother.
Karmas eyes landed on the blue haired menace that was shaking in the shoulders. His eyes always drifted towards him no matter what happened, no matter how pissed he was.
Those trembling shoulders didn’t originate from a place of fear… no… anger. That fact shivered up Karmas spine and into his shoulder and head, running past his ears and delaying his hearing for only a second.
The fights commenced, the students moving about the dampened leaves on the forest floor, paint splatters of blue and red, counting each out both teams got. Karma had been camping behind bushes, observing his teammates walking along stealthly.
The picture seemed ordinary… until… blue paint splatter covered the majority. The culprit exposing himself from the light that shrouded him in secret. His eyes glowing with a distance coldness, precise calculations, the eyes of an assassin.
Karma only observed. His bones chilled by the display of such graceful killing. Dare he say it was almost beautiful, the way Nagisa maintained the image of such a saint while following through with what would be, if it were real killing, a massacre. Despite his dispositions, he felt his chest lured towards Nagisa, like it had always been.
The “killing” and elimination of their fellow classmates continued, each team gaining the upper hand over the other multiple times until.. only two remain.
Emerging from the hedges, Nagisa stood with an ominous aura surrounding him, his eyes looking up through his bangs at karma who stood in the clearing.
“You let all of this bother you way too much.” Karma spat, suggesting Nagisa was sensitive. Nagisa’s poker face didn’t falter, he stepped closer and drew his paint covered blade.
Their dual began.
The two were skilled, that much was for sure. But Nagisa lacked in physical strength. He’d string himself thin trying to defeat karma in such a head on competition. There’s no way Nagisa would do such a thing… right?
Hits were taken, strikes dodged and blocked. Blood was shed and yet… Nagisa wasn’t backing down.
His breaths labored, his chest most likely aching with the need for more air. His arms bruised… his legs just about to give out.
Karma couldn’t take seeing him in such a way. Anger still flowed through his veins, many different reasons flew through his brain for his unbridled rage. But that didn’t mean he wanted to see Nagisa… down and pathetic…
Nagisa was being an idiot, pushing himself so hard, he’d surely lose.
With another blow thrown to Nagisa’s stomach, Nagisa lay limp face down.
Was this it?…
Karma approached the boy with little caution, picking his knife up and intending to end this thing.
His feet were about a foot away from the limp boy.
Staring down at him… memories flooded through karmas head. First year… second year… this year.
Nagisa, the dependable guy who wasn’t so much as a whisper in social settings. The one who’s always behind another, an after thought for the most part. This stupid boy who had little confidence in any of his skills had completely taken over karmas mind… his heart as well. Nagisa didn’t leave any room for anything else, how selfish of him, to take and take so much of karmas thoughts for himself to own.
His movements hesitated.
The quietness of Nagisa that karma had come to be comfortable with had shifted this year. Nagisa took himself more seriously… and maybe someone who looked over him like most wouldn’t notice such a difference but Karma did. The confidence that adorned his step now. It was undoubtedly because of that damned octopus… because of 3-E.
No wonder Nagisa wouldn’t let this go. This stability he finally felt, the reassurance of community he hadn’t felt before. What was he to do without it? This class gave Nagisa all he could need. What could karma offer in replacement? Could he even make Nagisa feel half of what he feels with these end class nobodies?
Karma stared down at him, and when he finally decided to smear the loud red paint on the back of his opponent…
Swift movements came into view that he could only register for a split second before a loud clap rang through his ears, leaving slight aches as they passed by. His vision blurring for a minute and only resurfacing to reveal Nagisa readying his next attack as karma was knocked off balance.
His neck was surrounded once again, by arms this time that pulled tightly and blocked his airway.
“Karma please listen to me!”
He yelled. His voice desperate and rough.
“I want to try- i need to save him- and you won’t even listen to me! He doesn’t deserve to die!”
His hold tightened.
Karmas head fell into a light headed spell. His thoughts muffled a bit…
It made sense now that karma thought about it. This classroom… was all that was holding Nagisa up in a state where he felt confident enough to follow through with things he wanted to do. The only things he felt had stability… ofcourse he wasn’t going to let that go so easily… not for karma of course.
Karma couldn’t offer that to Nagisa…
“We have to atleast try! We can’t kill him- not after what he told us!”
Nagisa’s frill yelling fell upon Karmas ears but he wasn’t listening.
He gasped for air.
Karmas hand raised up… his fingertips gently tapping on Nagisa’s bruised shoulder..
“I give up… you win Nagisa…” Karma rasped out as he tapped more fervently.
Nagisa’s choke hold continued.
“I said I give up- you win!-“
Nagisa’s grip loosened but he didn’t leave his position. His breath heavy in the crook of karmas neck.
Nagisa let him go after a few more seconds. His movements slow with the aches of his body.
He rolled over onto his back and stared up at the sky. Karma doing the same as he inhaled much needed air…
Little words were exchanged…
“I… guess I win then…”
Nagisa said, his tone not at all as enthusiastic as karma had expected. This ungrateful bastard had won this stupid fight and he wasn’t even happy about it??
Nagisa struggled to get up, stumbling to his feet…
Nagisa didn’t bother helping karma to his feet. Even if he had he would’ve probably toppled over. His whole body was heavy with exhaustion and pain from karmas attacks.
The other students looked on. Confused on what had just happened…
Karma was no different. It kind of pissed him off. Nagisa just walking away as if he hadn’t won at all. Karma put his pride aside to let Nagisa have this one and he wasn’t the least bit grateful was he?
Nagisa disappeared after that for a couple of hours.
No one tried to look for him… they weren’t sure if they should… if Nagisa would even want to be around anyone.
The sun was setting… Nagisa had to have gone home by now… at least that’s what Karma was thinking when he decided to walk through the forest that surrounded the old campus.
The trees darkened with the sky. Farther beyond the things karma could see infront of him was unknown and darkened to black, with the occasional golden hue from the setting sun.
Upon coming to a slight clearing in the woods… karma was acutely aware of how not alone he was now.
In the distance was a figure sitting on a rock… staring at nothing in particular… just… waiting it seemed.
Closer and closer Karma creeped. He found himself recognizing the blue hair that was once in pigtails but had been taken down, now falling down the figures shoulders.
He stepped closer… staring in silence for only a moment. He knew that Nagisa knew he was there too.
“Everyone already went home ya know…” Karma mentioned, attempting a casual tone.
Nagisa said nothing.
“You can’t stay out here forever…”
No response.
Karma grinded his teeth barely. This whole attitude was really pissing him off. More so than the actual fight they had just had.
“You’re being such a sore winner, I let you beat me… why are you still pissed?”
Nagisa whipped around. His face twisted in frustration. Maybe even more than when they were taking each others punches.
“Why am I pissed? You let me win- I didn’t win on my own. It’s all up to you isn’t it? I didn’t win-you just gave up.” Nagisa said as he stood up off the rock and into the weeds and dirt.
“What more could you ask for?- I had to let you win- you were gonna kill yourself trying to push yourself as hard as you were.” Karma yelled back.
“Don’t try and act like you care about me- or what I do- or how much I push myself. You have no regard for anyone but yourself- admit it!”
“You don’t-“ Karma had intended to give Nagisa a piece of his mind but was swiftly cut off.
“You only like toting me around sometimes because you feel bad for me, don’t you- you think you’re doing some charity work- just like how you let me win!”
“I don’t feel bad for you!” Karma yelled.
“Then what is it?- you think I’m so weak I can’t even finish to fights I’ve started?”
Nagisa’s breath was loud, whistling through his nose and he powered up another accusation.
“You think I’m defenseless- or maybe you think I’m full of myself- I don’t know! I don’t know what you think- that’s the thing!
No matter how close we get I can never seem to get you! You always seem to push me away before I can ever see inside your head for even a second! Why??”
Nagisa questioned karma fervently. The fire in Karmas chest that made him want to yell back at Nagisa died out with every word Nagisa spoke.
He was right. Karma did push him away. Always brushing him off, always putting distance between them. Especially after first year.
“Karma. I asked you a question.” Nagisa spoke firmly, looking up at Karma now.
Somehow, even in the dying day light and the darkness that creeped in, Nagisa’s eyes were still as visible as ever, burning a hole through Karmas head.
The silence between each of Nagisa’s questions was unbearable but karma couldn’t bring himself to answer. How would he even word it?
How was he supposed to come clean- how was he supposed to come up with a good enough excuse?
Nagisa’s hand shot up, grabbing karmas collar and tugging at it.
“Answer me!”
Karma stared at him with widened eyes.
The walls slowly crumbling as he realized… there wasn’t any getting out of this now, not this time.
Karma gripped Nagisa’s wrists and looked down at him… and then to the side of him… staring at nothing really. Karma just couldn’t bring himself to make eye contact any longer.
“Because… I can’t let you… in.” Karma finally spat out, his words like obstacles for him to trip over.
“But why? Why can’t you? Are we… just not as good of friends as I thought we were?…”
“No… I just…”
“Tell me! Stop beating around the bush.”
Karma stared at him once more. His brain was feeling fuzzy at this point. Even the thought of confessing such a thing was making him want to crawl out of his skin.
It wasn’t some cute feeling you’d get on a first date, no. It was the kind of feeling you get when you were a kid… and you knew you did something wrong… and you knew you were in trouble.
The looming feeling of impending doom lingered over Karma as he tried to settle himself down.
“You… I can’t.”
Nagisa tried to let him finish the thought before pressing him again.
“You just… you get under my skin…” Karma finally gave some sort of reason, a half assed reason, but Nagisa would take it.
“Under your skin? Do I bother you that much? Why do you even bother with me then- you could’ve just said that-“
“No. Not… like that you… just… you creep into every single thing I do.” Karma looked down.
“So… I should leave you alone?-“ Nagisa asked.
“No! God- you’re so literal… You get… in my head, and you don’t leave and…” Karma trailed off. Even with the little insight he had given Nagisa at this point he still felt he had said far too much.
“What does that mean?… like the things I say? Do they make you that angry?”
“I’m not angry! It’s the opposite-“ Karmas heart was pounding… it was making him insanely light headed, like his brain was made out of Pom poms. His hands shaky for no reason at all and his neck was dripping sweat.
“It’s the opposite… and that’s the problem.”
Nagisa just watched as Karma’s truth came tumbling out.
“You’re… In my head all the time. And I hate the way it makes me feel… and I hate the way your actions make me feel. I hate the way I think about you… and the things I think about you.”
As karma spoke… he could see Nagisa’s eyes slowly widen as he slowly pieced together what Karma was implying.
“But… I don’t… think I could ever hate you…” Karma almost gagged at how cheesy what he had said was but… it was the truth.
Nagisa’s hand that had gripped Karmas collar had loosened and was now resting on his chest.
“So… if you don’t hate me… what… how do you feel about me…?” Nagisa asked.
That kind of direct question wasn’t something karma was exactly ready for and it sent him for a loop. Sending a cold shiver down his spine and made the potion brewing in his stomach that much worse.
Nevertheless, his lips stayed sealed. Even if he came to a conclusion of what would be best to say at the moment, whether it be to lie or to tell the truth… he couldn’t get either out.
“You’re not gonna answer…” Nagisa said, almost like he knew already that Karma was too much of a coward.
Nagisa scoffed.
“Well I’m not a pussy like you. I’ll tell you exactly how I feel about you.” Nagisa spat aggressively and it almost felt like he was about to close in and punch Karma.
“You’re so- full of yourself… you’re always acting like such a badass and acting like you’re so smart. You don’t care about anyone else but yourself- and I… I’m stupid enough to…” Nagisa trailed off… for a moment it sounded like he was getting choked up.
“Ugh…” Nagisa looked down and wiped his face quickly.
“To wanna… just be… with you. All the time.”
That… surprised Karma.
“And I want you to look at me… and think… about how much you… want me- the same way… I want you…” Nagisa wiped his face once more. “It’s so embarrassing- I feel so stupid… even more stupid than- falling into 3-E.”
Nagisa took a deep breath.
“And saying all of this now- I feel even more stupid than when I thought- all of this was just… admiration…”
Karmas eyes had long been widened. Nagisa wasn’t saying what he thought he was saying right?…
All signs pointed to what Karma thought… but he had to be sure.. he had too.
“What do you… mean by that..” Karma mumbled. His feet shifting his weight under him… crunching leaves and scuffing the ground awkwardly.
For some reason Karmas question seemed to piss Nagisa off.
“It means exactly what it sounds like, Karma. I like you..”
Karmas face went a brilliant color of red… you could probably see it from a mile away if it weren’t for the darkness that shrouded them in secret.
This really couldn’t be happening right? Karmas feelings weren’t supposed to be reciprocated- they were supposed to be stomped out and forgotten about.
“I’m man enough to say it- i like you. That’s more than you have to show for anything.” Nagisa stepped closer.
He pressed his finger to Karmas chest.
“Now you… you stop being a pussy- and tell me if you hate me or not.”
Nagisa’s eyes stared into Karmas with the same fierceness that clouded his gaze when they were in the heat of the fight just a few hours ago. And that same near death experience feeling clouded Karmas head.
Only one word found its place on Karmas tongue.
“Nagisa…”
He said breathlessly. His hands somehow finding their way to Nagisa’s cheeks. Karma hadn’t even meant to move them… it just… felt right.
Nagisa former tight and tense stature relaxed against Nagisa’s better judgement.
Nagisa’s now loosened frame made it a whole lot easier for Karma to go through with an impulsive attack that he knew would end badly.
Karmas hands gripped Nagisa’s face firmly and pulled him up onto his tip toes.
Their faces close… their lips… much closer.
Nagisa only tensed for a second for the sudden change… but quickly accepted his place.
Nagisa kissed back with much more confidence than Karma… he was the kissing expert after all…
Karma actually… felt ok with taking the backseat on this one… letting Nagisa do whatever he pleased… man it felt good…
Those warm, soft lips against his. Nagisa’s quick breathing and his hands scrambling to find the right place to hold Karma.
The smell of Nagisa’s soft, natural scent of clean laundry and shampoo… mixed with the musky, earthy smell of the rough battle they had pryer. It felt so hostile and yet so welcoming… Karma could be covered in it. He wanted to be covered in it.
Nagisa only pulled away briefly.
“What are we doing-“ Only to be pulled in by some unseen force, back into that fevered kiss on his own accord… all Karma had to do was sit there.
Nagisa pulled away serval times to give meek protests to the kissing… even though he was the one pulling himself back in everytime.
“This isn’t good-“ He muttered.
“We should stop…” He’d say as he stepped back, dragging karma with him and leaning on the rock.
“This isn’t a good idea-“ Nagisa said as he started kissing on Karmas neck.
It felt like heavenly bliss with the side of almost shitting your pants with how nervous Karmas whole body was. He swore he felt his teeth vibrating. From excitement or anxiety, he really didn’t know.
It was only when Nagisa bit him when he felt like he should slow them down.
Karma pulled away.
“Ha…” Nagisa let out a breath… staring up at Karma.
“D-did I bite you?” Nagisa stuttered with the shakiness of his lips and his hands. “I’m sorr-“ His voice died on his tongue…
Karma… just pulled him into a hug.
He buried his face down into Nagisa’s neck… and for a moment he thought Karma was gonna bite him too.
But… he felt Karma take a big whiff of him and just hug him tighter.
Somehow… that made the butterflies that lived in Nagisa’s stomach by this point lose their minds… maybe even more so than the kiss.
They just sat there… in the darkness… alone… together.
Finally the question that Nagisa should’ve asked in the beginning found its way out.
“Karma- do you-“
. . .
“I hope I’m not interrupting anything.. nufufufu…”
That damn voice… that stupid laugh.
Their head shot up and looked over to the source.
Their dumb faced octopus teacher… stood there… face pink and cheeks blushing.
They scrambled to get an appropriate distance between themselves.
“No sir-“ Nagisa said.
“We were just headed out.” Karma’s words found him at just the right moment.
“I’m afraid all the trains have left for the night children.” Koro-sensei said, his face momentarily changing back to normal.
“I can fly you home if it’s not too much of an… interruption.” His face blushed again.
“No!- no interruption… we’re… good to go home.” Nagisa said as he stepped forward.
They were both swept up by yellow tentacles and tucked into Koro-Sensei’s gown. Just as they did when he took the two to see the Sonic Ninja movie…
They took off at lightning speed… they’d be home in no time… and with Koro-sensei within listening range… Nagisa couldn’t possibly ask Karma now…
He stared down at the night lights of the city flash by… when he felt something warm caress his hand… and slowly interlocked fingers with it…
Nagisa looked over at karma… he stared down at the city like he wasn’t doing anything of importance.
But that twinge of a shy smile that no one got to see very often on Karmas face… felt like enough of an answer for Nagisa.
“You’re such a pussy…” Nagisa said to Karma as a smiled curled its way onto his face.
Karma looked at him… and smiled too.