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“i was wondering,” sungho says, munching on his lunch, “don’t these get in the way when you kiss someone?” he gestures towards the twin rings on taesan’s bottom lip with his fork.
it’s just the two of them in the company’s cafeteria. they’re sitting face to face on the small table next to the window, loving a little sun, a little natural light, in this closed off building. their feet occasionally touch.
taesan isn’t really comfortable eating with people – that aren’t sungho – around. they started on the same day, progressed at the same pace, making them grow close despite not being in the same service. sungho takes his lunch break an hour earlier to be with him.
“why don’t you come and find out for yourself?” taesan raises his eyebrow. he leans back in his chair with a characteristic teasing glint in his eyes. he tilts his head prettily, his black hair following the movement.
“don’t be silly,” sungho chuckles with a dismissive shake of his head. taesan’s smile widens at the sight. he’s particularly fond of sungho’s cute reactions.
“it doesn’t have to mean anything,” he says, shrugging, trying to make his tone flirtier, more tempting, “you’d have an answer to your question.” he nudges sungho’s foot with his own.
“or,” sungho insists, “you could just tell me.” he stares at the boy opposite of him with determination and stars in his eyes. he places his cutlery down.
taesan chuckles, “where’s the fun in that?” he leans back in, forward, brushing the top of sungho’s hand with the tip of his fingers.
“nevermind,” sungho playfully rolls his eyes, successfully ignoring the shiver that runs down the length of his spine.
he doesn’t really care for taesan this way. sure, taesan’s objectively super attractive, but he’s also his friend. only that, sungho’s only ever seen him as that. he’s perfectly content with their relationship and has never considered having more than what they have now.
“suit yourself, pumpkin,” taesan tells him, taking his hand back to himself, fitting his palm under his chin, instead. he looks out of the window, faking disinterest. he can feel sungho’s puzzled yet insistent gaze on him. it gives him a thrill that he preciously keeps inside.
they remain silent for a moment, then. sungho inspects every of taesan’s features, takes in every millimeter of tan skin, softly redder on the apple of his cheeks. his pink lips. the shape of his nose, the shape of his jaw. sharp lines adorned with the loveliest curves. in the sunlight, he can even notice hidden freckles just under his eyes, gently kissing his cheeks.
he doesn’t like how it all makes his stomach twist. his heart beat a little faster against his ribs. matter of fact, it offends him. taesan just can’t win like this – planting such an idea in sungho’s brain and getting away with it. this asshole.
the rings catch into the light for the shortest second and sungho makes a decision. “you know what,” he says, pushing his plate away, “i changed my mind, i think i actually want to find out.” he closely looks for taesan’s reaction and relishes in the way his eyes open slightly with surprise. caught out by his own game.
sungho beams with pride, but doesn’t let it show. it feels good to take taesan aback, for once. to tease him and not be teased by him. (god knows just how many times that happens daily).
he stands up, all casual, like their friendship isn’t about to take a turn. he’s a little slow with it. he lets him simmer in his own questions. he takes his time so that taesan breaks, one way or another.
and, when he’s right beside him, right over him, taesan looks up at him with glassy eyes. like a prey about to be devoured. sungho asks, “or are you backing down? are you a coward, taesan?” and it’s his tone that’s flirty, now.
taesan blinks as though he’s trying to understand what’s happening all of a sudden. sungho can see all in real time how his blood rushes to his cheeks. how he swallows before he tells him, under his breath, “i’m not a coward.” even he doesn’t seem sure.
“i thought as much,” sungho agrees, softly nodding, and taesan thinks it’s unfair just how pretty he is. of course taesan is nervous. he’s never thought that his little joke would actually have consequences of this kind.
sungho brushes his knuckles on taesan’s cheek. slow, slow, pushing a strand of his hair behind his ear, following the shape of it with the tip of his fingers. feeling all the earrings and piercings cold against taesan’s hot skin. he holds his face in his hand.
it’s delicate and it makes taesan’s breath hitch. it makes his heart stutter. it’s unconscious, then, the way he leans into sungho’s warmth. eyes pleading.
sungho ignores the way his insides tightens with pure fondness. the shininess of taesan’s light brown pearls, almost like he’s about to cry. the slight frown in his eyebrows. he may feel all tender about him but that’s not what this is about, right now. it doesn’t matter that his stupidly pretty eyes make sungho melt, lose all composure. it’ll probably matter too much later, but not right now.
so sungho leans in close, close, till his lips brush taesan’s. a few soft strokes of his thumb along his freckles. an uneven breathing, similar to the rhythm of his heartbeat. he doesn’t kiss him just yet, only to be the devil. to watch him squirm with impatience.
and sungho always gets what he wants.
taesan begs a whiny, “please,” and sungho closes the gap between them with a satisfied smile.
taesan tastes like honey and sunshine and hesitation. a mix so ridiculously perfect that sungho kisses him a little longer, a little deeper. he holds onto him a little tighter. chasing after all the flavors, not able nor willing to let go.
it’s their first kiss and somehow they already know their way around each other. when to part, how to tilt their head, to press their lips together just right. it feels good.
a noise coming from the door startles them apart. sungho has approximately half a second to make it seem like they weren’t doing what they were doing.
he heads back to his chair and sits, awkwardly moving his cutlery around, as someone comes in to use the coffee maker. and, completely dazed and out of it, taesan looks at him. they don’t say a thing till the person leaves.
then, “i didn’t really feel them,” sungho tells him.
still high from the kiss and his pretty eyebrows meeting in a frown, taesan is confused. in a wordless question, he asks sungho about what he means.
“the lip rings,” sungho helps him, chuckling.
“oh, right,” taesan says in a whisper, a little dumbly, and sungho thinks that he’s so lovely.
it’s that same night, when he’s laying in the comfort of his bed, that it all downs on sungho. he sure acted like it was nothing the whole afternoon, but now he tosses and turns, unable to get even a blink of sleep. he and taesan kissed. like, an actual kiss that lasted long enough to leave him tingles all about, like electricity. not just a quick peck. and, oh, god, those eyes.
sungho doesn’t remember ever being looked at with such raw need, like his kiss could save taesan’s life. especially from someone whom he considered to be a friend just this morning, though now he’s not so sure.
he thinks that if taesan were to ask again, he wouldn’t refuse him. he doesn’t like where this is going.
the following morning, bags under his eyes as dark as his coffee, sungho doesn’t ignore taesan, but he doesn’t particularly seek him out, either. and he doesn’t get to see him at all. taesan’s probably hiding, too.
this isn’t healthy and they really should talk about where that leaves them. taesan assured him that it didn’t have to change anything, but words and feelings don’t always align, and it did. it changed sungho’s whole worldview.
it’s eleven when he finally gets a sign of life.
taesanie
[taesan_lips.jpg]
want to know how these feel?
sungho slams his phone down on his desk, breath caught in his throat, face burning. he looks around and behind him to check if anybody could’ve possibly seen the picture of taesan’s gorgeous lips with new piercings on either side. no simple rings, but spikes.
his heart is beating fast. nobody noticed, thank god, but taesan’s still crazy for sending this while they’re at work. he knows that sungho’s desk is in an open space.
pumpkin
you’re infuriating
where are you
taesanie
the archives room
i’ll be waiting ~
pumpkin
:rolling_eyes:
sungho bites a smile back. he figures he can take a longer break. he’s always giving too much of his time to capitalistic bullshit bosses, anyway.
carefully, he pushes his chair under his desk and, in the sea of people going back and forth, he heads to the archives room. oh, taesan’s planned this meticulously. nobody ever uses the archives room because everything’s scanned and online, now. he’s sure that some people here don’t even know it exists. so, it’s a great hiding place to do things you aren’t supposed to do at work.
down in the basement, sungho pushes the door of the room open, finding taesan leaning against the shelves filled with dusty boxes. his arms are crossed over his chest and he’s looking at sungho with a teasing smile.
sungho mirrors it when he states, “oh, you must really want to kiss me again.” he makes sure to lock the door though he’s not sure if he’s allowed. he doesn’t really care when there’s a pretty boy waiting for him. he walks up to taesan, he gets all up in his space. “don’t you?”
a shaky sigh escapes taesan’s lips. he wants to stay in control, to keep the lead, but it feels so good to give it up to sungho. to be guided, to not think. to be putty when sungho takes his hands and places them on his hips. his own on taesan’s chest.
“yes,” he breathes out, sungho’s angel eyes staring into his, rendering him faint, “so badly.”
sungho smiles a little wider. he goes to gently cup taesan’s face. he drags his thumb across his bottom lip, enjoying how it turns white before it turns pink again. he feels the way taesan shivers. “well, you’re in luck, because i also want that,” he tells him as he fidgets with the spikey jewel.
“yeah?” taesan asks, breathless.
“yeah,” sungho chuckles, endeared and not as unaffected as he lets it show, pushing himself closer, still, to taesan’s trembling body. he wraps his arms around his neck. on his lips, he whispers, “don’t be shy, come on.”
taesan downright whimpers. so, ashamed, he dives into sungho. he captures his lips into an urgent kiss, gentle before it turns bruising, tightening his hold on his waist. he feels sungho smile into it and his lips feel so right when he kisses back. like they were carved out of passion. made to kiss taesan.
and it’s hot, it’s so hot, the way they part, breathe life into each other, before they fall back deeper, a rhythm like a dance. so free as they discover and adapt to each other for what seems like ever. sungho hums contently when he feels taesan’s touch go up his back, down, up again, one of his hands resting at the back of his neck. when he pulls him in flush closer, closer.
only to push him away a few seconds after, though he still keeps him in his space. sungho’s eyes flutter open in confusion.
“i’m sorry, i just,” taesan says, his chest heaving, his ears red, “it’s getting too good and you’re so pretty and i don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”
sungho frowns, mindlessly running his fingers through taesan’s hair, “why would you make me uncomfortable? i was quite enjoying what we were doing.” he lightly scratches his scalp with a small smile.
“hyung…” taesan whispers. he looks away, bashful.
it takes a moment for sungho’s kiss-drunk brain to get taesan’s point. “oh,” he chuckles, before it turns into a genuine laugh of affection, “oh, you’re so cute. look at me, you’re so cute.” he guides taesan so he looks back at him. he pecks his lips with an uncontrollable smile, “you’re so, so cute, taesanie,” another peck, another, just because, “that wouldn’t have made me uncomfortable. i promise.”
taesan whines as he hides into sungho’s shoulder in embarrassment. he stays there, and sungho continues to leave kisses on his ear, in his hair, hands never stopping their movements.
it’s so easy to be in this moment with him. it’s safe and soft. love is so simple when they’re embracing each other. because, this may be new, but they’re still friends. they know each other. the affection’s been there for a long time before this.
“i can’t feel those, either, by the way,” sungho informs with a brush of his lips on taesan’s skin. taesan breaks into a lovely laugh, like the song of fairies. he nuzzles closer and presses a gentle kiss on sungho’s neck, just above his collar.
“should we try till you do?” he asks, coming back up to look at sungho, all red cheeks and swollen lips. he raises his eyebrow playfully.
sungho’s smile turns incredibly fond. taesan is young and a little bit of a fool and he wants to kiss sungho at work because it’s thrilling. he’s not supposed to – but he doesn’t really care because life isn’t fun if he doesn’t take risks. sungho thinks he wants to be more like him.
sungho thinks he wants to kiss him again, too.
“sounds like a plan,” he replies, burning the sight of a blissed out taesan behind his eyelids, so that he’ll be able to see them even with his eyes closed. his heart is loud and he wonders if taesan hears it.
the next day, taesan finds a small plastic bag with new jewelry in it, waiting for him on his desk. giddiness bubbles in his stomach.
at eleven, he goes to the archives room, brand new twin rings on either side of his lips. he doesn’t even have time to greet sungho that he’s already pushed against the door and kissed breathless. he’s got nothing to complain about.
it becomes a habit. routine. every weekday, they meet at eleven in the archives room. every weekend, sungho stares at his ceiling, wondering about their relationship, feeling ghost hands all over his body. because he let taesan be bolder with his touch, allowed him to reach a little further, and maybe he shouldn’t have.
he’s never thought about the consequences of letting him touch his ass. why would there be any? it’s all in private and sungho enjoys it. except taesan can’t seem to read into his mind. he grabs his ass in between two meetings, when he comes to his desk with a question, every time he meets sungho, it’s like there’s a magnet. like he can’t help it.
sungho replies with a death stare and taesan chuckles, fond. he’s probably acting clueless on purpose. sungho can’t have that, anymore. they’re in public, for fuck’s sake. there has to be some boundaries.
he doesn’t kiss taesan as soon as he locks the door, like he usually does. but, taesan reaches for him and sungho lets himself be drawn into his space. once they share a breath, taesan leans in. sungho almost falls for it. he almost forgets.
he gently cups his face and pushes him away. taesan looks at him with big confused eyes, sungho’s greatest weakness. god, he’s making this harder than it needs to be. “there’s something i need to tell you,” he says, delicate hands stroking over the blush slowly creeping on taesan’s cheeks. already so hot and bothered and sungho’s barely touched him.
“okay,” a sudden sobering feeling washes over taesan, blood making way to nervousness as it runs through his veins. he chews and chews on the feeling till he’s able to swallow it. he flutters the glassiness in his eyes away.
noticing – always, when it comes to taesan, sungho reassures, “i’m not putting a stop to this. this isn’t what i’m doing. relax, baby.” his heart turns to mush as he feels taesan melt with relief in his hands. “i just need you to cut down on touching my ass in public. i’m, like, ninety-nine percent sure that riwoo’s noticed. he won’t tell, but not everyone’s as kind,” he explains, gentle thumbs tracing idle lines on the apple of taesan’s cheeks.
it’s so, so sweet the way his ears turn slightly redder. the way he chews on his bottom lip in embarrassment. sungho wants to kiss him all over. to bite into him, to eat him.
“i’m sorry,” taesan apologizes, looking straight into sungho’s eyes, trying to convey just how much he means it. he doesn’t like that he made him uncomfortable. guilt prickles under his skin.
“it’s okay, baby,” sungho reassures him, “i mean, it’s not like i don’t like it, i just–would prefer it if you did it away from prying eyes, you know?” and it’s soft, the way he talks, telling taesan that he isn’t mad, that he never was, that he’s glad they’re having this conversation.
taesan nods in understanding. “yeah, i get it,” he smiles, so delicately, sungho’s chest tightens with emotion. they still haven’t talked about what it means for them. and, maybe they should, but they also like this as it is now. they get each other without words. another thing that sungho loses his mind over.
“great,” he nods, before he leans in, a possessive hold on taesan’s face. he kisses him with utmost affection, tasting, diving, pouring what he’s yet to say into it with the hope that taesan understands. oh, he must. sungho knows him. sungho loves him. in the end, isn’t that just the same?
taesan’s first instinct is to kiss back. to pull sungho in closer. to revel into the soft noises and sighs that sungho leaves on the edge of his lips. his second is to pull away, to ask, “aren’t we supposed to be communicating?” he chuckles breathlessly and sungho desperately wants him.
he says, “we’re done with that,” dismissive and focused on the rings that taesan’s wearing today. there’s a star-shaped pendant on them. “except if you have something to tell me?” he asks, thumbing at taesan’s temple, at his jaw, pressing it into his bottom lip.
sungho’s looking at him like he wants to devour him whole. “no, i’m good,” taesan replies and sungho kisses him with insatiable hunger.
it turns out, sungho wasn’t done with what he had to tell taesan. wasn’t done at all.
it’s been a while since the night’s fallen upon them, embracing each boy in its comforting weight, songs of cicadas and cars lulling them to a state of tire that they can’t really go against. jaehyun’s been the first to go up to his room, having a busy day when the sun’ll come up, even though it’s a sunday. leehan, of course, followed little time after him. jaehyun’s bed is a twin size and yet, they’ll be found curled up into each other, limbs all intertwined, tomorrow.
riwoo’s place isn’t far, so woonhak walked him back, and probably crashed there. there’s not much any of them can refuse to these big and bright brown eyes.
that leaves them here, now, taesan sitting in jaehyun’s sofa, sungho’s head on his lap. he runs his fingers through his pink hair. heart steady in his chest, he’s the most fulfilled he’s ever felt. the most content. his lips rest in a small, tired smile.
he thinks sungho’s asleep. his breath is even, his eyes are closed. he’s so, so pretty, taesan feels it choke him up.
“you know,” sungho mumbles, breaking taesan out of his trance, “i love it when we kiss. i really love it. it breathes life into me. it’s like–” he pauses for a second, looking for the proper words, “being with you’s making me buzz with joy. i just–i always want to be with you, taesan.” he’s tipsy and sleepy and his speech is a little slurred. his eyes flutter open and he reaches up, leaving a caress on taesan’s cheek and shivers in its wake, smiling, “my baby. i like you so much.”
taesan’s heart threatens to burst out of him. he can’t hear anything, can’t see anything, but the pretty boy on his lap, confessing. in this bubble of a moment, nothing else exists. only sungho. taesan takes his hand and presses a kiss into his palm. he asks, “if i say it back now, will you remember it in the morning?”
sungho chuckles, his eyes falling closed again. “probably not, you’re right. i’ll tell you again tomorrow because i very pathetically want you to be mine. and to be yours, too,” he promises, his soul upon his lips, tainting every of his words with it. he tugs on taesan’s shirt, “gimme a kiss, for now. lay down with me.”
taesan’s never denied him anything.
sungho stirs awake to his whole body being trapped by taesan’s arm around his waist. their legs intertwined. his face rests in the crook of taesan’s neck, who so distinctively smells like him, like home, it’s dizzying.
he tips his head back a bit, checking on the beautiful boy holding him, only to find taesan already looking. a pleased smile slowly appears on his lips. oh, he wants to get used to this, to these loving eyes taking him in, every morning. to waking up next to someone so ridiculously perfect. sungho wants it so badly.
“hi,” taesan whispers, stroking sungho’s back with slow touches, “slept okay?” he counts every bump of his spine. he starts again because he’s sure that he’s missed one.
sungho chuckles quietly before he answers on the same tone, “not at all, but waking up to you makes up for that,” and he quickly pecks taesan’s lips. he’ll pass on another night on jaehyun’s sofa, but he’ll bet every last drop of his melting heart on taesan embracing him so tenderly.
“you know how to make a guy blush, pumpkin,” taesan tells him, a bit shy. sungho can see, with each second that passes, the way blood carefully rushes to color his cheeks a pretty red. it rouses the butterflies in his stomach.
“lucky me that it’s the guy i like,” he confesses, his eyes staring deep into taesan’s, the tip of his fingers following the shape of his ear that’s all adorned with pretty piercings that sungho helped choose. taesan smiles and sungho thinks that it can never get better than this.
taesan rests his forehead against his. “lucky us, then, because you’re the guy i like, too. so much,” he breathes onto sungho’s lips, before he captures them into a soft kiss. it’s pouring with sweetness and taesan can’t believe that he gets to have this, at last. he feels so complete with sungho.
it’s not a soulmate thing, it’s no red thread theory. taesan willed this moment – this love – with the ugliest and most sacred parts of him. a will so powerful to find the one to bring sunshine, comfort, joy, to his life. for them to embed themself so much in it that he wouldn’t ever have to feel like he doesn’t belong. his freedom has cotton candy hair and tastes like coco chapstick.
with a giddy laugh, sungho moves on top of him, never parting too far, placing a million butterfly kisses all over taesan’s face.