Chapter Text
It was a full moon tonight. Just like that night, the one he won’t ever forget. The night he lost the love of his life. Swallowed by the shadow, consumed by the darkness, leave him alone in his long lasting life. It has been a whole month since he came back to the place where he lost his star. And a whole sixty-eight years since. Hongjoong stood on the edge of the cliff, in his leather jacket and ripped jeans. He parked his car a little farther. To walk longer, to feel the burn on his chest. Just to feel something, anything.
He misses him every day and night, but he longs for him at this kind of night the most. Where the moon shines the brightest, the weather gentle, and the sea reflects the stars above.
Hongjoong passed the crying phase, now he just feels a hollow in his chest. The grief that won’t ever fade. He misses him so much he could trade anything just to see him again for one last time.
He closes his eyes and hugs his frame, trying to remember the feeling of someone else’s in his hands. That's when he hears the sound. Of someone singing a sorrowful ballad, full of pain and anguish.
The sea full of ear
I close my eyes and feel
I’m gonna sit still
Know how to sail
The song was so beautiful yet carried so much agony. Hongjoong was lured by their singing, walking closer to the edge.
A sea song
A lonely song
A few and a few
Should we cross the wave?
༶•┈┈⛧┈♛┈⛧┈┈•༶
Legend says, the siren is a vile creature.
They lure people to the deepest ocean.
Where all the darkness and loneliness be.
But the truth is, they're just lost souls.
The one that bears all the sorrow.
Drowning in all their broken vows.
Every full moon, where the siren's song carried the most potent magic, they sang. For any lonely soul to trade with.
Letting go of their grief, erasing the pain, including the memories within.
Tonight he feels it.
The pulse of a grieving heart.
So close.
So heavy with pain.
Then the siren starts to sing, of a lonely sea chantey.
A splash, of a man breaking the calm surface.
He sees it, the glowing blue light. Coming from a man with a black leather jacket. He looks calm, drowning in the cold freezing sea. The man looks beautiful, surrounded by the blue light emanating from his chest.
The siren swims closer to the man, but the closer he gets the heavier his heart grows. He should give the man his deepest desire, to trade his despair with a fake indifference. Swapping their fate, to become an empty shell, bound to the sea.
But the siren became uncertain, he lingered above the man. For a while, he feels the time has stopped. Freezing the moment, or is it how the magic is supposed to work?
Then the siren made up his mind, swimming closer to give him the kiss, sealing the curse. But when their distances were a mere breath away the man opened his eyes. A flash of emotion shows in his deep amber eyes, a very strange sight. The man's hearts glow purple, something the siren never heard nor seen before. He looks confused yet closes his eyes anyway, surrendering to the presence of the vile creature.
Then black.
The siren surrounds in nothing but darkness, lulled by the calming waves in the deepest ocean floor. When he opened his eyes, the man he supposedly changed fate with was gone. He was alone, again, still in his original form. Nothing changed, the magic failed. Or maybe he was just cursed to be grieving alone in his long and lonely life.
He sighed and resigned.
༶•┈┈⛧┈♛┈⛧┈┈•༶
At the other side of the beach a man was drifting ashore, half naked. The man was confused and ashamed. He hurriedly used his jacket as a bottom, trying to cover his rear as much as he could. Like lightning splitting through his skull, memories came rushing back all at once. The singing. The fall into the sea. The kiss.
Seonghwa.
“Oh my god. What the fuck just happened?” Hongjoong whispered to himself, trembling in disbelief.
Did the deity just grant his wish? Or is it some kind of cruel joke? One thing he knew, his Seonghwa was alive somewhere out in the ocean. Then the realization fell on him, the love of his life, the soul of his soul, spent decades in the cold dark sea all by himself.
Those thoughts broke him.
He tried to call him, with all his might. Screaming his name until his throat gave up. Yet nothing came up, he almost believed that all the things were just part of his pathetic delusion. But the purple pendant glowing softly in between his bare chest was too real, soft lips and tender hands were just too vivid to be part of an imagination. He fell to his knees, crying and punching the sand.
“I will come back, I promise you my love I will find you. Nothing in this world can separate us, not even the cruel fate.” Hongjoong finally stood with determination, looking at the calm sea beyond.
༶•┈┈⛧┈♛┈⛧┈┈•༶
The next day, Hongjoong was prepared. He was set on finding his life partner, and promised to never come back unless with Seonghwa. It was early morning when he parked his car near the coastline. The sun barely rose on the horizon. He was bringing his dry suit, oxygen tube, and all the gear to diving. He was determined to find his beautiful monster.
He was waist-deep in the water when he saw the glimmering eyes from behind the coral rocks. Hongjoong could only see half his face, for the rest was submerged under water, yet he would recognize those beautiful hazel orbs anywhere. Hongjoong was star struck, again, by the same being. He slowly swam closer, trying to be as subtle and as calmly as he could be, with a racing heart.
The creature was diving as soon as Hongjoong was near. But Hongjoong was not having it. He chased him further, fully diving to the ocean bed and back to the top. The beautiful creature was fast, but Hongjoong was relentless. He finally emerged. Hongjoong didn't even realize they were back near the shore again.
Hongjoong finally removed his mask, surprising the other man. They were still a few meters apart but it was enough. Hongjoong knew if he came any closer the other would just flee again. And he needs to talk to him. Just one chance. Hongjoong still wasn’t sure but Seonghwa was some short of a merfolks now.
Seonghwa was staying idly, flinging his shimmering tail under the rising dawn.
“Seonghwa please, I know you hated me. But please, I need to know what happened to you. We need to talk.” Hongjoong was shouting, hoping the other caught, beside the sounds of the crashing waves. After a few beats, Seonghwa finally swam closer.
Seonghwa in front of him was different, yet the same. He still conveys the same spark, hidden beneath the sorrowful eyes. The Seonghwa before him now looks older, not by age but by the heavy burden lingered under his skin. Seonghwa looks different, not because of his anatomy but because of the grief he carried. Seonghwa is still beautiful, he is, and always beautiful in every form and every shape. The midnight blue tail gleaming, reflecting the sunlight. His hair was as deep as the ocean, waist long now, braided in sea shells. And the purple amulet, floating and moving under the calm water.
“You know me.” Seonghwa says, stating instead of asking.
“Yes, of course I do. What do you mean?” They're just a foot apart now, Hongjoong could feel the way the water waves with every move of Seonghwas’s tail.
“Who are you?” Seonghwa asked, with a blank expression. Showing nothing but confusion. Shocked was an understatement. Never in his life Hongjoong would predict this kind of event. Finding the love of his life again after years and years of searching, only to be slapped by the cruelest fate. He was lost for words, his mind was blank for he didn't know where to start.
He wanted to scream, to cry. Shake his shoulder, demanding how Seonghwa could forget him.
Forget them.
But one look into those bright hazel eyes shattered every selfish thought inside him. Those beautiful eyes were just as empty as the morning sky.
“I’m your…” Hongjoong swallowed hard. “Your partner.”
The word felt fragile now.
“But Seonghwa, please… There's so much we need to talk about. Can we sit over there?” He pointed toward smooth rocks near the shore. “I can’t stay afloat forever in this gear.” Hongjoong’s leg was growing tired, with all the extra baggage.
After a moment of hesitation, Seonghwa nodded.
They decided to sit at low and smoother rocks, so it won’t hurt Seonghwa's body, nor his suit. The sun is higher now, so Hongjoong could see the blemish on Seonghwa’s skin. His arms are full of scars, he doesn't know where they came from. Hongjoong really wants to touch the other man, the longing was overwhelming. He needs to clench his fist and jaw just so his hand won’t reach and scare away the lovely being in front of him.
“You are the man from last night,” Seonghwa suddenly said, as if just remembered or recognized him.
“Yes,” Hongjoong whispered. “That was me.” The look on the other man shows confusion. A deep bewilderment. Hongjoong realized that the other man wouldn’t give any explanation, not when he was as confused as himself. The way he looks at the horizon tells him enough.
“All right,” Hongjoong said carefully. “One thing at a time. My name is Hongjoong. And you are Seonghwa.” He hesitated. “You disappeared sixty-eight years ago.” The man immediately turned his gaze at him, shocked written all over his face.
“That’s impossible,” he breathed. “I was wandering alone in the ocean for that long? But how?”
Hongjoong nodded slowly.
“Do you remember how you turned into a merman?”
“I'm not.”
Hongjoong blinked. “Okay, fine.. it’s okay we wou–”
“I'm not a merman. We called ourselves, "Siren.” Seonghwa averted his gaze back at the sea, to the orange hue at the horizon. “We trade fates with grieving souls,” Seonghwa explained hesitantly. “We take away their pain, their memories… and in return, they serve the sea. The bond is sealed with a kiss.” He looked back at Hongjoong whose eyes were bulging because he remembered vividly that they were kissed last night.
“But how? You were, I.. We? And I still have my memories intact?” The siren just shakes his head, sighing.
“The magic failed, I guess, or I probably just cursed to be bound to the sea forever, wandering in this cold dark ocean all alone.”
“No.” The force in Hongjoong’s voice startled them both. Tears burned his eyes as he shook his head desperately.
“No, Seonghwa. I searched you for decades. Do you really think I’m going to let you disappear again now that I finally found you? Swim away back into the cold ocean?”
His voice cracked.
“I’ll find a way to bring you back home. I’ll help you walk on land again. I’ll help you remember everything.”
Hongjoong's eyes were red rimmed, holding on to tears. He can’t let the love of his life go again, not now, not ever. Especially now that he knew how Seonghwa was living all these years.
The siren was perplexed, but he nodded slowly. Probably still in doubt, but Hongjoong was dead on. There is nothing he couldn’t do. He was Kim Hongjoong.
“I will come back to you, I promise. So please. Please don’t go anywhere and wait for me, okay? I promise you Seonghwa, do you believe me?” Hongjoong reached out his hand, palm open, an invitation. The siren slowly reached and held Hongjoong's hand back.
༶•┈┈⛧┈♛┈⛧┈┈•༶
One thing he hasn’t told Seonghwa is they were both wizards, and Seonghwa was his life partner. They were bound by blood, they were soulmates. Lovers, and everything more. He thought he needed to go slow with Seonghwa. He can’t bombarded him with all the info, he might be overwhelmed. And the one thing he didn’t even dare to recall. The one that broke Seonghwa’s heart the most, the reason he was gone that night. Hongjoong needs to be gentle, mending his lover’s heart tenderly.
He clutching the twin stone inside his shirt, swore to himself that he would make everything right again. With trembling fingers, Hongjoong reached into his bag and fumbled for his phone. The screen lit up weakly as he searched for a familiar number.
Then he pressed the dial. The phone picked after a few beeps.
“Hyung, where are you going this freaking early? I woke up and you and your Jeep were gone?” oh, he knows he’s gonna get such a lovely loud greeting from the other line.
“Wooyoung, listen to me carefully, don’t be panicked.”
“You telling me not to panic only makes me more panic, don’t you realize that?”
“Now get Sannie first, I need to tell you both so I don’t have to repeat myself.” His hand clutching the steering wheel tightly, his knuckle turned white.
“Whatever, SANNIEEEE COME DOWN, HYUNG IS ON THE LINE!” Wooyoung was shouting, Hongjoong needed to move the phone a little bit. He sighs heavily, trying to calm himself a little. Thinking about how to break the news to them. “HE’S HERE NOW TELL US WHAT’S GOING ON!!” Hongjoong wincing at the loud voice.
“Don’t shout at me, you menace!” Hongjoong scolded light heartedly.
He hesitated for a few beats, letting the tension deepen. His head starts pounding.
“Wooyoung I– I found Seonghwa.” He decided to just rip the bandage and deal with the consequences later. Which isn’t so late because another shout was heard from the other side of the line, a glass breaking sound and curses, lots of curses, even from Sannie.
“WHAT THE FUCK DO YOU MEAN YOU FOUND SEONGHWA?? WHERE? ARE YOU WITH HIM NOW? I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU’RE NOT BRINGING HIM THIS INSTANT I WOULD RIPPED YOUR PRETTY FACE APART!!”
“Wooyoung-ah calm down a little–” a soft voice was heard beside the screaming, and Hongjoong was suddenly choked by a sob. Because Seonghwa was loved, he was cared for by lots, especially his baby kitten. “It's not that simple Wooyoung–” Hongjoong’s eyes begin to brimming with unshed tears, again.
“IT IS. YOU JUST DRAG HIS PRETTY ASS BACK HERE, OR JUST SPELL HIM OR BOUND HIM I DON’T CARE. You need to bring him home, hyung, please..” the shouting was receding and turned into a pitiful sob. Hongjoong’s heart was sinking with the sound of Wooyoung crying.
“I want to bring him home too baby, nothing I want more than just holding him and cradling him in my arms right now. But it's not that easy, he was…. He is a siren now.” Hongjoong tells them in between sniffs.
“What? Siren? Man eater, pirate reaper siren??” It was San who asked in turn.
“Yes, and no. Apparently, sirens were cursed people who traded their painful memories to become one, bound to the sea. They need to kiss and trade with another soul to gain their feet back and walk on earth again.” Hongjoong retells the lore told by Seonghwa.
“So now what?” Wooyoung cut in.
“Now we find another way to break the curse. I'm sure there’s gotta be something in one of our books, a spell, ritual, or anything. There had to be something.”
༶•┈┈⛧┈♛┈⛧┈┈•༶
The three of them were cramming from morning till midnight, they even closed the flower shop for the day. Who even cared about tending flowers and selling goods to people when their person was in need. Hongjoong and his two familiars were scattered on the living room carpet. Those two were not just their familiar, they were their friends, their spiritual allies. So when Seonghwa went missing years ago, it didn’t just break him. It broke them too, especially Wooyoung, which is Seonghwa’s own magical companion.
“Hear this,” San said. He is in his human form, eyes locked to the book. His eyes still scanning the yellowed pages spread across the table. “They say the first siren was created by a witch named Calypso, after she had her heart broken by a fisherman’s daughter. She was betrayed because the—”
A deafening crack of thunder split through the house.
The windows rattled violently as rain slammed against the glass, the storm outside growing fiercer by the second. Candle flames flickered wildly, throwing trembling shadows across the room.
Then the grandfather clock struck midnight.
Once. Twice.
By the twelfth chime, the sound of the wind chime echoed sharply through the house.
All three of them froze.
Hongjoong’s head snapped toward the hallway immediately, every muscle in his body going tense.
That was impossible.
Before opening the ancient spell books and forbidden lore about mythical creatures, they had sealed every entrance themselves. The doors locked, the windows bolted and the protective wards carved carefully into every frame. No one should have been able to enter unnoticed.
The three of them slowly looked at each other, unease crawling beneath their skin.
Then without a word, they all stood at once.
And headed for the front door.
Hongjoong was the front man, he opened the sliding door separating the living room and the flower shop. Right there by the front door, his Seonghwa standing Drenched, in nothing but the purple amulet. He was shivering, only god knows how far he walked. Wooyoung and San were gaping at the other man. But Hongjoong reacted swiftly, he took the closest thing that could wrap his man. Which coincidentally there were only rolls of burlap cloth, which made him look like a poorly wrapped bouquet. Hongjoong brought the trembling man inside, while gently slapping both his shocked kittens' heads.
“Is that really Seonghwa??” Hongjoong heard Wooyoung whisper-shout to his mate, his voice sharp with disbelief..
Hongjoong asked San to bring a shirt and pants so Seonghwa could dress properly. He was kneeling in front of Seonghwa, rubbing and blowing his hands trying to transfer some warmth. While Wooyoung is just standing on the side, don’t know what to do.
“Don’t just stand there, make him something warm would you?” Hongjoong asked without averting his eyes.
“It’s okay baby, you’re here now. You’re safe.” He said, while blowing warmth and kissed the rough hands softly.
A few seconds later, San was back with the clothes. Seonghwa seems still in shock, so Hongjoong brings his freezing body to the bathroom while still holding it closely. He dressed him quickly, but then stopped for a second before putting on the pants.
“Now is not the time to be a pervert, Kim Hongjoong.” He mentally punched himself.
He seated Seonghwa on the toilet lids, then grabbed both of his hands again.
“Hey, are you with me? Hwa? What happened? You said the magic failed?” Hongjoong asked carefully. The siren’s eyes still look like in trance. For a while no one was talking, the room was quiet– just heard a whirring sound from the heater. Hongjoong was growing restless, he subconsciously put his forehead on Seonghwa’s knees.
“Talk to me baby, please.” He pleaded. Then he feels a hand caressing his hair, hesitantly. It was so soft, Hongjoong almost didn't feel it. But it’s there. He almost burst into tears. But he let him be. He could wait as long as Seonghwa needed.
Seonghwa looks lost and it’s quite terrifying for hongjoong. But the siren’s lips started to open and close a bit, just like trying to tell something.
“I don’t know what happened,” Seonghwa tried to test his voice, rainwater still dripping from his hair onto the wooden floor beneath him. “Wh—when the storm started… the sea became violent. I was hiding in my usual place, but the waves kept dragging me under. I got tossed around so badly I think I lost consciousness for a while.”
His right hand moves slowly up to the things that linger on his chest. His fingers tightened around the glowing purple pendant resting against his chest.
“When I woke up again, I was lying on the shore.” He hesitated, glancing downward as though he still couldn’t fully believe it himself. “And I had legs instead of… the tail.”
The room remained silent except for the storm raging outside.
“I didn’t know where to go,” Seonghwa continued softly. “But this pendant kept pulling me somewhere. Guiding me.” His gaze finally lifted toward Hongjoong. “I didn’t even realize it led me to your house.”
Hongjoong listened while his head rested on Seonghwa’s knees, blaming himself for everything the other man had been through. But when he lifted his head, locking eyes with his everlasting partner, he smiled tenderly. He showed him the twin pendant from inside his shirt.
“The pendant was pair, and it would always lead their way to each other. It will always lead you to me.” The two familiar were lingering in front of the open door, watching the soft scene in front of them quietly.
“You’ve had a long day, now let’s get you to rest. Come on.” Hongjoong led the tailless siren to his bedroom upstairs. He held his waist firmly, afraid the other would vanish if he loosen his grip even for a bit.
Hongjoong opens the first door on the left, their room. He let Seonghwa in first, then closed it behind him.
The room wasn’t so big, with one queen size bed in the middle and a small desk beside it. The wall was filled with books and trinkets, charms, and post cards from around the world. Seonghwa was left standing by the side, while Hongjoong tried to tidy up a bit. He wasn’t expecting any guests on his bed tonight.
Seonghwa was looking around while Hongjoong worked, barely touching anything, with his eyes still as empty and heavy as the first time they met. He was lingering on the small music box in the corner of the room.
“You can open it.” Hongjoong suggested, surprising the siren a little. “It was yours, actually.”
“It’s pretty.” Seonghwa answered shortly.
Hongjoong’s bed was almost bare with just one pillow in the middle and an ugly pink bunny doll beside it. But it still looks as comfortable as it could be.
Hongjoong let him rest for the night, and excused himself to get back downstairs. But not before he convinces Seonghwa that he was safe now, nothing could hurt him anymore. He was home.
༶•┈┈⛧┈♛┈⛧┈┈•༶
“You! Explain!” Wooyoung whispered a shout from the end of the stairs.
“I don’t know. You heard him, he said that he was unconscious and suddenly had two feet.” Hongjoong continued talking while passing his friends to grab some liquor in the kitchen. He can’t deal with this sober.
“You said the magic failed? Does that mean that he kissed someone else after yesterday?” It was sweet Sannie who asked, concern thickened in his voice.
“The problem is that we don’t know what caused the magic to just busted? That doesn’t make sense.” Hongjoong starts pacing back and forth from the kitchen island. “Wait, or is it actually working?”
“But you still walk on two legs, and your memories are intact?” Wooyoung asked incredulously.
“Or is it pending? Would you suddenly grow a tail and forget us all???” San asked with trembling lips.
“I don’t know, okay, I’m as blank as you guys are.” Hongjoong said. For a few minutes, the three magic people drown in their own minds. Dwelling different scenarios, of the same actor.
“Wooyoung.. You’ve seen it right. I know you do. I... I don’t understand how, but. How could that be? What makes him now?” Hongjoong asked again after a few minutes and a couple glasses of whiskey.
“You fucking pervert... But yeah I saw it. Ugh i start to hate this word but I don’t know. Is it possible he changed organs when he turned into a siren?”
“I’ve never heard of that kind of spell before? Even when we tried to–, the ritual didn’t even turn his genitals.” Hongjoong tried to say it calmly, but his brain was short circuiting. He can’t help it, every time they talk about that, he feels like scratching an open wound.
“Great, just another mystery for our pile of the unknown lore of our dear siren.” Wooyoung grumble.
“We could try contacting other witches and wizards hyung, they probably heard about this somewhen, somewhere.” San added.
༶•┈┈⛧┈♛┈⛧┈┈•༶
The siren wakes up around noon, waddling slowly to the kitchen where the other three are still cramming on their dusted books and diving in the internet. He was cradling the pink bunny on his arm, while his eyes wandered.
Hongjoong immediately got up when he saw the walking siren go down the stairs. But then he stopped on his track, seeing the stuff he was holding.
“Hey.. How’s your sleep?” Hongjoong said hoarsely, holding back tears.
“Good. Better than on the coral.” A small smile formed, a lift on his corner lips. Small win for Hongjoong.
“Ehmm, you like the pink bunny?”
“Ah, yeah.. Is it yours? I’m sorry–”
“No no it’s fine, it used to belong to someone. But if you like it, it’s yours now.” Then Seonghwa, seeing the pink bunny in his hands, nodded a bit and held it closer.
༶•┈┈⛧┈♛┈⛧┈┈•༶
Jinju, Korea 1956–
Today is market day for Seonghwa, so he picked his straw woven basket from his yard. He struggled a little with the clothing and his growing belly, but eventually managed. He waddled happily to the Jungang market, which was just a few minutes away from his home. He picked the vegetables from his regular merchant, an old lady who sells the most fresh greens and fruits with the help of her granddaughter. She always compliments Seonghwa’s face and clothing. Today her eyes were immediately glinting when she saw Seonghwa.
“Agassi, what do you need today? Halmae just picked these radishes. It's very fresh and sweet.” The old lady showed him the white radish and other vegetables.
“I’m no agassi– halmae, I'm married.” Seonghwa replied, chuckling. He was looking around the stall, saying hi to the granddaughter while at it. Today, Seonghwa only wanted to buy some white cabbage, but he was lured by the beautiful peach, it was Hongjoong’s favourite.
“Nonsense, beautiful lady is always an agassi. Ahh your eyes are sharp dear. The peaches are the sweetest today, that little brat right there was stealing it every few hours.” Seonghwa was laughing lightly at their antiques. Because while the grandmother scolds, the little girl only sticks her tongue out while grabbing another peach.
“I’ll take these, Halmae.” He gave her the money, and asked her to keep the change.
“Your husband is really lucky to have you, my dear. I hope you and your little family will always be healthy and happy.” The old lady patted his hands and rubbed his belly, giving a blessing.
Seonghwa continued his walks further to the market, going to his husband’s shop. He owns an apothecary where he sells cough potion and other traditional medicine. Their shop was quite famous because they’re proven remedies. Though he won’t sell a too powerful potion, afraid that their covers would blow. They tried to build a family and live a peaceful life here, in Seonghwa’s hometown.
“Nampyeonnn~~” Seonghwa called when his husband was closing the stall.
“Tsk! Why are you bringing this heavy basket, love? You should wait for me. We could shop together.” Hongjoong scolds his husband, while taking the basket from his hold. The other man was just chuckling while taking his husband’s other arm.
“Nampyeon, look at my joegori~ I embroidered it myself this morning, hehehe...” Seonghwa was showing his little stitches on his sleeve.
“Aww it’s beautiful, are those stars?” Hongjoong kissed Seonghwa’s cheek softly.
“It is! It’s your constellation~” Seonghwa was caressing the embroidery, feeling proud of himself.
They were walking back home hand in hand, feeling free because they could express their love even under a disguise. They were talking aimlessly, when Seonghwa stopped in his tracks and jaw slack. Then he looked at his husband with puppy eyes. Eyebrows raised, lips downturn– a signal that he wants something. Something Hongjoong might oppose.
“No.” Hongjoong didn’t even let his man complete his request.
“You haven’t even heard it!”
“I knew it was nonsense. It always is!”
“But it’s for teunteunie~” He persuades him with his shining eyes and a small pout.
“You’re not being fair to me baby. Huff… Okay, but just this one. No more unnecessary things, okay?”
“Yes sir!”
They finally bought a pink bunny doll, which wasn't even pretty. But Seonghwa is delighted.
“I love you, Nampyeon~” Hongjoong chuckled while patting his head.
–*