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“Hey, hey, Calliope?” The person at the next desk tapped her on the shoulder, blinked at her with a sly grin, then crooked a finger to beckon her closer. All of those little gestures formed only one conclusion in Calliope’s mind—great, she was about to get dragged onto another pirate ship by that walking bundle of bad ideas again.
Though she wasn’t exactly a model student, Calliope didn’t particularly want to become a habitual troublemaker either, so more often than not she chose to temporarily ignore the nearby Hoshimachi Suisei. Only, every single time she did that, the invisible wall she built up in her mind would be mercilessly shattered with ease, and before she knew it the distance between them would vanish again.
Sometimes, Suisei would suddenly lean close enough that Calliope could catch the pleasant scent clinging to her, and because of that her heartbeat would always skip at least once—this wasn’t a trick Suisei used often, but it worked every single time. For some reason, when it came to the girl seated beside her, this move was unfailingly effective. Even if Calliope had only just declared an internal “I’m out” earlier that day, it would turn into nothing more than a useless scrap of paper in the silence, and she’d still end up dragged right down with her.
The other situation, though, happened far more often—including today. Suisei would simply grab at her clothes (or even her wrist) and yank her over directly, always pulling hard enough to make Calliope stumble. But Calliope wasn’t exactly defenseless either; if she kicked a rock while walking down the road, then at the very least that rock was going to suffer for it too. Naturally, she wasn’t about to let Suisei off so easily. Even during class the two of them would end up wrestling each other without a care in the world, and the moment Calliope grabbed at Suisei’s collar, the teacher barked out a sharp stop: “You two, hallway. Now.” The tiny scraps of conscience and self-awareness Calliope possessed made her instinctively try to argue back, but that brief hesitation only earned her a hit from Suisei. Wincing from the impact, she heard the girl murmur lowly to her, “Look at me properly, Calliope.” Somehow, eventually, their scuffle came to an end. The two of them stood out in the hallway leaning against the wall, dust smeared all over their backs without either of them caring, shoulders pressed together as though nothing had happened at all, both gazing up at the sky. In the end, it was Calliope’s long sigh that drew the curtain on the farce as she asked:
“So, what did you want to say earlier?”
“Hm? Earlier? It really wasn’t a big deal.” As expected of a repeat offender, Suisei had even managed to swipe the carton of apple juice left on her desk on the way out of the classroom, and was leisurely sipping from it through a straw now.
We are literally being punished right now, the two of us. Calliope grumbled internally. But if it wasn’t a big deal, then didn’t that mean they’d basically gotten into a random fight and ended up randomly thrown out into the hallway? …Well, after thinking about it carefully, this kind of thing happened often enough already. Otherwise, they wouldn’t have become one of the school’s running jokes. “Need me to tutor you? Or did someone piss you off again, Your Delinquent Highness?”
The words had barely left her mouth before the person beside her burst into laughter so hard she nearly lost her grip on the apple juice carton.
“Hey—hey. Was that really that funny? Most of the time it’s always something like that, isn’t it? Just dragging me along so you can kill time.”
In the end, Suisei laughed so hard she had to grab onto Calliope’s shoulder just to straighten herself again. Wiping at the tears in the corners of her eyes, she finally stopped being cryptic.
“Calliope, I—”
As she spoke, she brushed aside the loose strands of hair hanging beside her ear, allowing Calliope to clearly see—
“Help me pierce my ears? Tonight.”
…
……
Calliope’s gaze couldn’t help but settle on Suisei’s soft earlobe. If she lowered her head just a little, she could bite it—
Stop right there, Mori Calliope, what the hell are you thinking?
If making too much movement wouldn’t have drawn attention to herself, she probably would’ve smacked herself somewhere hard already. More importantly, what had she just said? Piercing her ears…?
...What? Wait, wait...
Once the words finally registered, Calliope genuinely thought something had gone wrong with her hearing. Tonight? Not tomorrow? Or… a few days from now? After she’d researched what exactly she needed on SNS or in actual books, after she’d mentally prepared herself so she wouldn’t end up like this—already able to vividly imagine herself standing behind Hoshimachi Suisei with trembling hands, internally screaming for someone to either handle this for her or erase her from existence entirely.
God, did she think that just because Calliope already had piercings, she’d definitely know what she was doing?
Even as Calliope desperately wanted to scream internally and complain about the girl beside her—or just come clean and admit she absolutely couldn’t do this—when the words reached her lips, something inexplicable swallowed them all back down and replaced them with:
“...Alright. Really tonight?”
As though some fairy godmother had flown over her head scattering magical dust, turning the act of refusing Hoshimachi Suisei into something impossibly difficult. By the time she realized what she’d just said, she could only curse herself internally:
Fuck, what am I even saying?
But Hoshimachi Suisei didn’t care about any of those extra thoughts. One “okay” was enough for her—in fact, she’d probably never intended to let Calliope refuse in the first place.
Her scheme successful, Suisei turned around as the bell rang for the end of class, patted the person beside her on the shoulder, then immediately followed it up with a wink.
“I already bought everything, so let’s head home together after school too, okay?”
With that tossed behind her, she stepped back into the classroom with light, cheerful footsteps, leaving Calliope alone in the hallway trying to deal with a CPU on the verge of crashing.
The moment the final bell rang, the students in the classroom scattered like startled birds with their bags in hand.
Calliope slowly rose to her feet, almost numb as she started packing up her things. The movements of stuffing books into her briefcase were sluggish, heavy, like her arms had been filled with lead—or maybe she was deliberately stalling for time.
Her mind had been a complete mess all afternoon. Even the countless instances of harassment from the girl beside her during class had gone mostly ignored, drowned out by one question and the fear swelling around it:
Can I actually do this?
Honestly, if she really could, she’d love nothing more than to punch the version of herself who agreed to this earlier straight into the ground.
And yet, strangely enough—even though none of this made sense—there was one thing she knew for certain: if she actually refused Suisei, she would regret it.
So Calliope spent the entire afternoon replaying tonight’s scene in her head over and over, tracing the shape of Suisei’s slightly thin earlobes in her imagination, the smoothness of her skin too, despite never having touched them on purpose before.
...Alright.
And only then did she realize she hadn’t actually formed a single practical plan for what she’d been entrusted with.
Not only had she failed to mentally prepare herself all afternoon, she’d somehow only made herself even more terrified—that was precisely why she was now frozen stiff in her seat, trying to escape reality.
At this point, Calliope wished Doraemon really existed. Maybe then she could do literally anything else—like setting off in search of the drawer containing the time machine so she could go back to the past and tell the version of herself who got her ears pierced to actually learn some proper technique—
—instead of futilely stalling here, only to have Hoshimachi Suisei decisively snap her bag shut, grab her wrist, and drag her outside while informing her that this whole avoidance thing was meaningless.
“Don’t just sit there blankly staring, okay? I’m leaving everything to you, Calliope,” Suisei said.
She had no idea how many corners or alleyways they passed through after that. At some point, the wrist Suisei had been holding turned into Calliope holding her hand instead, and Calliope’s palm had already begun sweating faintly.
Normally, Mori Calliope would’ve shaken her hand off long ago and headed the opposite direction by herself—even if avoiding her meant taking a massive detour home despite how close their houses were.
But for some reason, today felt different.
As though powerful magnets had been installed in their palms, and Calliope simply lacked the strength to pull away. Even this short walk exhausted her completely.
She didn’t hear a single thing Suisei said along the way either—about what shops they passed, or where she planned to work part-time. But it was almost like Suisei understood all of that perfectly well, because every time Calliope drifted off in thought, she’d mischievously tighten their interlocked fingers instead.
Until eventually, Suisei unlocked the door to her house with a click.
Clack.
The noise and bustle outside vanished completely the moment the lock slid shut. Even ambulance sirens and the distant chatter of strangers faded away, leaving behind only faint rustling sounds and each other’s breathing.
Suisei slipped off her shoes first and walked further inside, naturally releasing the tightly held hand in the process.
The warmth lingering in her palm disappeared.
Calliope snapped awake from her daze as though emerging from a dream. Standing in the entryway, she raised the hand that had just been released and stared blankly into her own palm.
—And then Hoshimachi Suisei entered her field of vision completely, occupying every inch of it.
“Calliope.”
The girl turned sideways, catching the raised hand and slowly lowering it beside her.
Too close.
Normally, this sort of distance was something Calliope had long grown used to. Dodging her, pushing her away—those things were effortless. Almost instinctive, really, like shoving trouble far from herself on reflex.
But now, her heartbeat skipped.
As though she’d grown greedy for the warmth of Suisei’s breath and the temperature of her palm, her entire body felt nailed in place, her gaze not even permitted to flee.
They were close enough now for her to clearly see Suisei’s eyelashes trembling faintly with each steady breath, light flickering within those eyes like stars scattered across a night sky, deep enough to swallow her whole and leave her unable to look away.
Those pupils seemed to strip away every other sensation she had. Time, place, purpose—everything was discarded. Only the knowledge of her own name barely remained, while even the method of breathing slowly crumbled away piece by piece, dissolving into brick and mortar that built themselves into the increasingly clear shape of longing inside her chest, clogging her throat.
And yet, despite how suffocating the feeling was, what she wanted in this moment was to run.
Her hand tried to pull free from that warm grasp, but in the instant she moved, it felt as though every chaotic emotion inside her had already been exposed. The hand gripping hers tightened, leaving her nowhere to escape, while the disordered rhythm unique to Mori Calliope pounded through her pulse straight into Suisei’s palm.
Suisei looked at her current dazed state and ended up laughing because of it: whether it was Calliope’s earlobes or her cheeks, every single part of them had been faintly tinted red. Ah, Calliope, did you secretly drink alcohol while I wasn’t looking? You’re such a bad kid too, huh? As she said that, smiling all the while, she pressed her palm against Calliope’s cheek. The slightly elevated warmth transferred directly through the contact, and then her fingertips shifted just a little, moving to rub at Calliope’s earlobe instead. A pure black stud hung there, and Suisei, like a cat that had found itself a new toy, couldn’t resist fiddling with it between her fingers. Whenever her hand slipped behind Calliope’s ear, it would lightly brush through her hair, occasionally grazing the back of her ear and the nerves along her neck and shoulders that seemed directly connected to her brain, making Calliope’s scalp prickle numb.
She wanted to reach up, grab Suisei’s wrist, and shove it far away—but the hand being held carried Suisei’s slyness within it: her other hand was still occupied carrying Calliope’s briefcase, leaving her unable to do anything right now—right, exactly like that, so naturally she accepted Suisei crossing the line. But the person in front of her was clearly someone who didn’t understand moderation very well. Seeing that Calliope neither said anything nor showed any resistance, Suisei simply followed the momentum of her own words and pressed down slightly on her shoulders, lowering her posture a little before tilting her head upward and mimicking the way an animal sniffed around. Only, the distance between them grew closer and closer, until eventually even their noses were nearly touching. Watching all of this unfold, Mori Calliope felt like she’d been kicked headfirst into chaos. What exactly was she doing? Didn’t she think this was way too... intimate? She nearly flipped through every word in her mental vocabulary before finally being forced to admit that the current situation could only be categorized by those two words. This was way too strange. She even found herself wondering whether this was some temporary hallucination caused by lack of oxygen in her brain—lack of oxygen? Oh, God. Only then did she realize she had completely forgotten how to breathe, holding her breath the moment their noses touched.
“...Suisei, weren’t we supposed to be piercing your ears?” Calliope sighed as she spoke.
“Hm? Yeah.” Hearing that, Suisei finally returned to a more normal distance. “I just thought you seemed kinda distracted. Turns out it wasn’t because you were drinking after all.” She added that as an explanation for her earlier behavior, putting on a slightly disappointed expression as though the answer she’d hoped for had fallen through. But her eyes had already swept over Calliope again and again, clinging tightly to her as though trying to see right through her, and the smile hidden within those pupils felt more like a silent question: Then what is it because of?
“...”
“Then, I’m gonna wash my hands.” Struck head-on by the utterly nonsensical words Suisei had tossed at her, Calliope couldn’t even maintain eye contact for more than a few seconds, afraid that gaze might carve straight through her. She fled in disarray. Thankfully, this wasn’t her first time visiting Suisei’s house, so at the very least she wouldn’t embarrass herself now by walking into the wrong room.
—Actually, it was only... Or rather, at worst she’d just laugh at her a little, right? Why was she relieved by that thought? Today’s version of herself was abnormal to an almost ridiculous degree. This was supposed to be nothing more than an ordinary day. She should’ve treated it the same careless way she always did—if Suisei grabbed her and dragged her off somewhere, then she’d simply follow along and keep her company. So why did today feel unbearably long? Suisei’s every glance and smile, even the breath that drew closer each time, the warmth passed through her palm—all of it replayed over and over inside her head like a rewinding tape. She looked toward the mirror above the sink, and one glance alone was enough to make her regret it: her earlobes were still faintly red, the color spreading all the way to the roots of her ears and across her cheeks, accompanied by the increasingly heavy rhythm of her heartbeat, like she had a fever.
Thankfully, the task waiting for her kept reminding and urging her onward inside her head over and over again, and that impatience finally forced her to stop herself before she spiraled any further. She stopped staring at herself in the mirror and instead splashed cold water against her face, dragging her rationality back into place. Wet strands of hair clung to her cheeks. Water droplets slid down along her jawline, mixing with the thin sheen of sweat there and perfectly concealing the mess she’d become. Alright, Mori Calliope. Deep breaths. Even if you have absolutely no idea what you’re doing, you’ve got no choice now except to treat a dead horse like a living one. But this was Suisei—and precisely because it was Suisei, no matter how badly she did, it probably wouldn’t be considered ruining things. Even if she messed up somehow, she could just treat it like she’d lost control of her strength today and accidentally hit her a little too hard. This was normal. Between the two of them, causing each other pain had never exactly been anything unusual—
She jolted violently: at some point, Suisei’s reflection had appeared in the mirror. The girl was lazily leaning against the doorframe, head tilted slightly as she looked at her through the mirror—like she was merely glancing over casually, yet without missing a single inch of her. Calliope’s thoughts were severed cleanly in half like that, leaving behind only fragmented, meaningless syllables echoing through the cramped little space inside her mind. Meanwhile, Suisei merely yawned, not even bothering to spare her another glance as she deliberately dragged out her words. “You still not done yet, Calliope——?”
“I’m done. Where’s the stuff?” she answered almost reflexively, too quickly, as though trying to cover something up.
“All set already. Come to my room.” Lightly tossing those words behind her, Suisei turned and headed back toward her room first.
Calliope pushed open the half-closed door.
The lighting wasn’t harsh. If anything, it nearly blended together with the gradually fading dusk, making her realize how late it already was. Outside the window, the blood-colored sunset was sinking westward, severed apart by the outlines of surrounding buildings. Suisei sat at the wooden desk beside her bed, looking out through the window together with the scenery beyond it. The light streaming in settled across her body, quietly staining her with traces of twilight. Calliope unconsciously softened her footsteps as she silently walked over to the desk. But the moment she drew close to Suisei, for some reason, the dusk-soaked evening light seemed unable to steal even a fraction of the radiance that belonged to her. Calliope’s gaze kept drifting back toward Suisei again and again, and the soft earlobes usually hidden behind strands of hair were now fully exposed. She bent down slightly, her hands uncertain where they ought to go, before ultimately following instinct and reaching out to touch Suisei’s earlobe, gently rubbing it between her fingers. Just like she’d imagined, it was rather thin. She thought: very soon, this place would no longer remain smooth. All it would take was a single instant. The needle would pierce through it, leaving behind an uneven surface and a tunnel running straight through the middle. What had it been like when someone pierced her ears for her again? Like being bitten by an insect, maybe—but it had happened in the blink of an eye, so quickly she could barely remember it anymore. She couldn’t even recall whether any blood had dripped down at all. By the time she came back to herself, her earlobes had already gained an extra weight. Everything had happened too fast. Too fast to leave her with any time to properly study it, learn from it, or even retain fragments of it.
“Calliope, have you decided where you wanna pierce them?” Suddenly, Suisei’s voice drifted over through the skin pressed against hers, vibrating faintly. It was as though Calliope had only just begun drafting her plans onto paper, and Suisei had already pierced straight through that translucent sheet. The girl gazing out the window finally turned her head, directing her attention toward Calliope.
“Oh... yeah. I think I’ve got a rough idea.” She sighed, almost like she was swallowing back words she’d been chewing over for ages before finally moving her hand away from Suisei’s earlobe and reaching instead for the alcohol wipes on the desk.
The coolness of the alcohol against skin eased some of the summer heat away, while the pressure applied to her earlobe carried a faint warmth through the cotton pad. Not only did Suisei not dodge away, she almost leaned into it instead, tilting her head slightly while narrowing her eyes. Like a cat. The thought suddenly surfaced in Calliope’s mind. She skillfully rotated her wrist, lightly brushing Suisei’s cheek with her knuckles, until Suisei opened her eyes once more. The deep blue within them, tinged with the afterglow of dawn-like light, struck Calliope hard enough to jolt her heart. Only then did she snap awake as though from a dream, hurriedly pulling her hand back. She suddenly seemed completely at a loss. After setting down the alcohol wipe, she began searching for the marker pen across the nearly empty wooden desk, her gaze darting and avoiding everything in sight until the edge of her vision finally caught it. She reached out and snatched it up immediately, desperate in the same way someone might clutch at a lifeline.
Calliope removed the cap and leaned close beside Suisei’s ear, one hand bracing against the back of her head. After examining carefully for a moment, she marked the very center of the earlobe. Then she did the same on the other side. As she leaned closer, she couldn’t help holding her breath, afraid her breathing might become too heavy and reveal the anxiety—and the pounding heartbeat?—swelling inside her chest right now. Only after pulling away from Suisei’s ear did she finally let out a long breath. Then she turned slightly, about to look for a mirror. “See how this placement looks,” she said.
But just as she was about to move even half a step away from Suisei’s side, her wrist was tightly caught first. The next moment, Suisei’s fingers skillfully slipped into her palm, fingertips lightly circling against her skin. Before she could even react, her fingers had already been occupied and filled completely by Suisei’s own. Suisei laced their fingers together and gently pulled her closer. “You don’t have to go through all that trouble, Calliope.” Suisei blinked. “I trust you.”
Calliope’s hand froze slightly in midair. Her gaze continued wandering throughout the room, sweeping over every corner, refusing to overlook even the dust illuminated by the sunlight streaming in—yet it stubbornly avoided landing on Suisei herself. She loosely held Suisei’s hand without daring to grip back. Normally she would’ve retaliated already, squeezing hard enough to make bones crack in protest, but instead she still cooperatively stepped back toward her. Suisei, understanding the cue, released her hand. Calliope took a deep breath: alright. If you’re satisfied no matter how this turns out, then fine.
The room suddenly grew quiet enough that only the sound of their breathing remained. Then came the faint noise of a thin metal needle being picked up from the sterilization case. The cold needle tip touched Suisei’s earlobe—but it trembled slightly. Don’t fall apart at a moment like this. Seriously, don’t. At this critical point, the hand gripping the needle refused to obey her, trembling uncontrollably. Nearly in a self-destructive fit, she cursed herself viciously inside her head. Suisei caught all of it from the corner of her eye, yet calmly slid her hand beneath Calliope’s shirt anyway, touching her waist and stomach, stroking her in fake reassurance.
“Calli, nervous?”
Just hearing her name spoken that intimately was enough to make her heartbeat skip. The distance between them was close enough now that Calliope could’ve counted Suisei’s eyelashes one by one from the side if she wanted to. And at that distance, Suisei’s words slipped softly into her ears, carrying a tingling sensation that traveled directly to her brain. The warmth against her waist and stomach even more so—was she provoking her? Honestly, Calliope was currently considering whether she ought to just quit entirely, toss the needle carelessly back into the box, grab the troublesome hand Suisei kept using against her, and hurt her however she pleased. The instigator deserved to suffer a little for this. But Calliope wasn’t someone who quit halfway through. Right. She’d always considered that one of her rare virtues. And so, even though her throat felt painfully dry right now, the desire to retaliate somehow became a stabilizer instead. Her hand stopped trembling: one hand braced behind Suisei’s ear, and in the next instant, the needle pierced through skin, finding its exit on the other side and passing directly through the marked point. Calliope grabbed the black stud lying on the desk—the one strikingly similar to her own—and the moment the needle was withdrawn, she immediately filled the newborn tunnel with it instead. As expected, tiny beads of blood seeped out. She moved to wipe them away for Suisei, but only then did she realize the fabric of her shirt was being tightly clutched from the inside by the very culprit herself. For the first time, Suisei’s gaze seemed uncertain where it ought to rest, eventually stubbornly lowering toward the floor. Only after quite a while did the force gripping her shirt gradually loosen, and only then did Suisei finally raise her eyes to look at her again—
For some reason, Calliope wanted to kiss her eyes.
Those eyes weren’t filled with fear or unease. Only that brief instant of disorientation lingered there. Not even the slightest mist clouded that clear night sky, yet it reflected her figure perfectly within it. That familiar, lovable gaze. That hateful pair of eyes. They always made her willing to let herself be swallowed whole.
“...Don’t move yet.”
Calliope swallowed hard, only then realizing her throat had already become dry enough to feel scorched, to the point that the voice squeezed from it came out hoarse. But there was no helping it now. She turned to pick up a cotton swab and gently wiped away the beads of blood from Suisei’s earlobe with the tip. Suisei, too, suddenly became much more obedient, sitting there silently and allowing herself to be handled however Calliope pleased. The room instantly returned to silence again, leaving behind only the faint sound of cotton brushing across skin. Neither of them spoke again. Even their breathing became lighter, like deliberately softened footsteps.
The stud on the other side was placed just as quietly within that same silence.
The atmosphere tonight is really weird, Calliope couldn’t help thinking. The two of them were always noisy together. Even when they fell silent, they still stayed pressed close against each other. But right now, it felt as though some transparent wall had formed between them—or perhaps a hazy veil instead. Their overly close warmth and breathing dissolved together like something submerged underwater, to the point that even reaching out to hold hands felt sluggish and gradually unreal. She had personally pierced through Suisei’s earlobes. If this wasn’t merely a passing whim on her part—then these piercings would probably stay with her for the rest of her life. Like a mark. But they had already given each other far too many things like that. Even the bruises Suisei had left along her waist and stomach still hadn’t faded yet. Still, one day, those would disappear. So then... was this a brand? Like red-hot iron burned into skin for life—were ear piercings the same kind of mark?
How ridiculous. She hastily arrived at that conclusion. Yet before she realized it, Suisei had silently leaned against her shoulder, fingers lazily sliding up from her forearm to the back of her hand, absentmindedly fiddling with her knuckles as though they were a toy. Calliope turned her head, catching sight of the black stud faintly glimmering beneath Suisei’s hair—and immediately pressed her hand down beneath hers in return, tightly interlocking their fingers.