Work Text:
"I have a date."
"O-kay... with who?"
"Someone from the party."
The memory of meeting Julie Kovalenko was one that was permanently seared into Emily's brain. How could she forget? It wasn't everyday that someone walked into the retirement home that their dad was apparently infiltrating with a strange woman that stole your identity. With said woman practically wearing your sweater in a different color. From the moment Emily met Julie, she had a feeling the woman was every bit reckless. Peculiar, even.
But when everything happened with Flo and Julie graciously honored her dad's instinct to run away and spend time with his family, Emily's view of the elusive detective slowly began to change. Especially after Thanksgiving. She started to see the similarities between Julie and her dad. They were passionate about their work and both had their unique ways of showing their care for the people in their lives.
Emily discovered how calculating Julie was. Almost to the point of obsession.
Even when it came to planning Charles' surprise party. Every detail, from the shade of blue for his cake, to the number of people invited to the party. It all had to be... perfect.
It wasn't difficult to narrow down who Julie's date was. After all, Emily helped her plan the surprise party for her dad. And he wasn't the only one in the family that could solve a puzzle.
"So... you're going on a date with Calbert?"
"What the fuck is wrong with you?"
"You literally could just say her name, you know."
“Fine. It's Didi.”
"There. That wasn't so hard, was it?"
"Shut up."
Shockingly, Julie didn't exactly fall off the face of the earth since the disastrous Thanksgiving dinner. Weeks after their painfully uncomfortable heart-to-heart in her dad's driveway with Julie, Emily received an unexpected text from the other woman in the middle of the night.
Julie: Things got weird with my mom again.
Emily: Explain
Julie: I asked her to help us with the case. To do her thing. Pick someone's pocket.
Emily: Julie…
Julie: I know. It was bad, I fucked up. But I apologized and we're okay now. I'm going to be better.
Emily: That’s good, Jules. That's what matters
Julie would text her about the most random stuff. Usually about Charles when she was really annoyed with him at work.
Julie: Your dad is extra hyper today. He won't stop talking about Mona and her stupid band, Lavender Freeway or whatever the fuck.
Julie: Like dude, we get it. Your girlfriend is way cooler than you.
Or the time Julie proved to Emily that she was much more emotionally capable than she led on.
Julie: Are you sure your dad really wants to move to fucking Croatia? Dude can't even leave the peninsula for a few days.
Julie: He's been yapping about the architecture there for hours. But then he gets this distant look in his eyes. Have you talked to him yet?
And then there was the text that started it all. When Emily found out her dad was on his way to officially being a licensed private investigator.
Julie: How good are you at planning parties..
It took a total of about 15 days for them to plan her dad's surprise party. And in those 15 days, Emily learned a lot about Julie. She learned that the woman loved spreadsheets. And she would grow comically upset when Emily didn't update the spreadsheet according to Julie's unreasonable timeframe. The woman had her google spreadsheet app on her phone permanently open.
What was most amusing to Emily, was that surprise party was Megan’s idea. And when she brought it up to Julie, she seemed nonchalant about it. But with each day that passed, Julie had completely taken over all the planning. She thought Julie's fixation on the invite list was a bit strange. Even down to the colors of the balloons and tablecloth. It was all so… weird. But endearing.
As an only child, Emily never understood the jealousy that siblings felt with one another. The spectrum of unspoken to blatant competition over their parents' attention. As a mom, she grew to understand the competitive dynamic between her own sons when they were younger - fighting over her and Joel's praises. But she never experienced that herself, until Julie.
When it came down to the invite list, Emily and Julie agreed that it would be an intimate celebration. Aside from Emily and Joel, there was only one other person to invite. And that left Megan with the task of reaching out to their only invitee, Calbert, and picking him up for the party.
Six people total, including Charles. That was the entire list of attendees. Up until the morning before the party.
Emily stared at Julie’s text message that day.
Julie: There's one other person that should be at the party.
Julie: I think your dad would be happy to see her there.
Emily: Please don't invite Beatrice.
Julie: God, no.
Julie: Didi
It shouldn't have come as a surprise to Emily. Her dad loved Didi and it actually made less sense that she wasn't originally invited to begin with.
Emily didn't know much about Julie and Didi's dynamic. All she knew from what her dad shared with her after the Pacific View Case ended was that Didi was pissed. Emily couldn't blame the woman. She was clearly one of the few people that genuinely cared about her job. If Emily were in Didi's shoes, she would totally understand never wanting to see neither her dad nor Julie ever again.
During the party, Julie seemed to keep mostly to herself. Silently nibbling on the finger foods, adjusting the utensils, or checking her phone. Meanwhile, everyone gathered around Charles showering him with admiration.
At some point, Emily was lost in a conversation with Megan about how she started working for Julie while the men were busy talking about her dad upgrading his wardrobe with more spy clothes. And by the time Megan excused herself to replenish the snacks, Julie and Didi were nowhere in sight.
Didi was the first to excuse herself from the rest of the party and shortly after her departure, Joel gave Emily a look from across the room. A look that told her it's time for us to go home too. She shot him a look in return that said, let me do my rounds first.
She found Julie in her office faintly smiling at her laptop. It didn't take much but a simple eyebrow lift from Emily for the other woman to blurt out the news about her date.
“Let me guess, Didi was the one to ask you out.”
“No, actually. You'll be very proud to know that I did the asking.”
Emily crossed her arms.
“Okay fine, she told me she was actually trying to spend more time with me a couple months ago,” she leaned back in her chair. “In a way I was right. She did have a long game.”
The intricacies of sapphic romance never ceased to amaze and confuse Emily. But she was in no place to judge as someone who identified as… well mostly straight.
“She hired me to do background checks at the time and then I accused her of trying to take me down because she hated me.”
A low, long whistle left Emily’s lips. She met a lot of people in her life, but she’d never met anyone like Julie. Intensely guarded but deeply caring.
“I just hope I can make it to the end of the date without making a complete ass of myself,” Julie placed her head in her hands.
“Well good news? She already knows how huge of a weirdo you are and still wants to go on a date with you.” That earned Emily a scowl from the other woman. “I'm just glad you weren't a complete idiot this time.”
*******
"Jace! Hurry up we're going to be late," Emily called out from the dining room, loading her bag for work. It was her second week in her part-time job at Wheeler College and she was starting to get the hang of the new routine.
Except Jace surprised her when he agreed to join her once a week during his summer break. It shouldn't have come completely as a shock because Emily had to bribe him with a new video game by the end of the month. But she knew it would be worth it because in just a few months, he would be applying to colleges. And she wanted him to have as much exposure to the campus and culture as possible before then.
Clamor from the other room brought Emily rushing into the kitchen, only to find Wyatt standing in front of the dishwasher. He looked like a toddler lost in a supermarket.
"Mom? Dad? Where do the forks go?"
Emily bit her tongue because she would not engage in this today. She didn't have time, she was already running behind schedule.
"Dude," Joel strode across the living room. "We've been over this already. Utensils are in the drawer below the cabinet where the cups are," he pointed in the direction near the stove.
Her husband shot her a look of hopelessness.
"Good luck with that," she said as she kissed Joel goodbye. "Try not to burn the house down, Wyatt."
"It's Nico's turn to cook dinner tonight," Wyatt complained.
Emily started in the direction of their front door when she heard Joel follow behind her.
"You know Wheeler isn't terribly far from your new friends," he said.
"My new friends?"
"Yeah, Julie and Megan?" Her legs somehow forgot that they needed to move and that she had somewhere to be.
"I mean... yeah we talk here and there but-"
"Em, Julie texts you almost everyday. Megan always has some kind of gossip to share with you about her weird dating life. I think they would consider you their friend," he tilted his head at her.
Throughout her young life, friends were always around. Maybe it was the loneliness of being an only child and the deep-seated urge to connect with other kids her age. Maybe it was because she was naturally empathetic; so tuned-in to other people’s energy that she always had a strong sense of who she could get along with. Either way, making friends was never a problem for Emily. But as life goes, she got older. And got married, had three kids. As did her friends. And staying connected just seemed so much harder to do when one was nearing 40 years old and raising three boys.
Making friends in her thirties didn't come as naturally as it did for her in her younger years. Emily never thought of herself as lonely. She had Joel and her kids. But there were times when she missed the feeling of being surrounded by her friends. Women. She missed the unmistakable energy and warmth that sparked between a group of women. The loudness, the messiness, the joy.
She was around her boys all the time. Would she die for any of them? In a heartbeat. Did she also need a break from them every once in a while? Desperately.
"Look, you're entering this new chapter of your life. You have a new job, you're going back to school, and becoming a social worker. These new friends could be a part of that too," he placed a hand on her shoulder. "Your sons may be helpless, but they're not hopeless. I'll hold down the fort at home. Might as well go have fun with your friends while you're out there."
A tug pulled at the corners of Emily's lips as she regarded her husband. "Thank you,” she said, wrapping him in a tight embrace before pulling him in for a kiss.
“Ew gross!" Jace yelped as he came down the stairs. "Get a room guys, there's kids around."
Emily and Joel shared a smug look before she followed her son out the door.
The drive to Wheeler college was as engaging as any car ride would be with a 17-year old. Emily's Spotify playlist filled their silence as Jace stayed engrossed in whatever game he was playing on his phone. They were about 40 minutes out of Sacramento when her music stopped playing.
Incoming Call from Julie
"Julie?"
"Hi. Do you-" she heard Julie cough. "-maybe have a few minutes to talk?"
"Uh, sure," a slight lilt in her response. "Just a heads up, you're on speaker. Jace is in the car with me."
"Oh."
"It's fine though. Whatever you're going to say, just keep it PG as much as possible. Although, I'm pretty sure a 17-year old could care less about what a bunch of old ladies are talking about," she glanced over at her son. "Right, Jace?"
"What," he murmured absentmindedly.
"See?" Emily assured her.
"Okay," Julie sighed. "So we went on our date yesterday."
Emily gasped and gripped tightly onto the steering wheel, leaning forward to listen as if Julie were sitting in front of her.
"Well, how did it go?"
"I think... it was fine."
"Julie."
"What?"
"If you give me any more one-worded responses describing how it went or how you felt, I swear to god I'm driving straight to your office and leaving Jace with you all day."
"Wait, I get to work with grandpa?"
"Fuck ok, jesus." Julie and Jace spoke over one another.
"So as you know, we met up for drinks at a bar. Everything seemed... I don't know, normal?" Emily could practically hear Julie pacing and talking with her hands. "We talked a lot about work and joked about your dad. And at some point we ended up talking about how sad our dating lives have been over the past few years."
"Uh huh," Emily nodded along like Julie could see her.
"You know... she was kind of mean to me," Julie said inquisitively.
"She was mean to you?"
"Yeah, she said I probably scared off all the women who were interested in me because of my very apparent paranoia."
Emily snorted because that was likely very true.
"But then she said, 'Maybe you just need someone who gets you and all your weirdness. Someone that can balance your need for control while trusting you to take the wheel when you need to.' Then she said, 'Not a lot of people can be that kind of partner.'"
Emily thought about her relationship with Joel. So many of her friends wondered how she got so lucky as to end up with a partner, let alone a guy, that could balance being on a team together and trusting the other when one needed to take the lead.
"Was that her being mean or was that just the truth?" Emily asked.
"Both."
"I think you like that she's a little mean to you."
Julie was quiet but Emily could still hear her pacing.
"So, how did the rest of the date go? Are you guys going on a second one?"
Similar to her first impression of Julie, Emily’s memory of meeting Didi would be one for the books. Pretending to be her dad's niece was an unforgettable experience. It didn't take long for Emily to get the sense that Didi was a compassionate and welcoming person; tender and warm. The complete opposite to Julie's icy and guarded vibe.
Maybe on the surface, they would seem like a match made in hell. But when Emily really thought about it, Julie and Didi had a lot more in common underneath it all. Underneath layers so thick they ran as deep as the earth's core. At least that's what it felt when one got to know someone like Julie Kovalenko.
"The rest of the date was... great, actually. I think she even flirted with me."
"You...think?"
"Yeah she leaned a lot over the table. She laughed at some of the things I said even though I wasn't really trying to be funny-"
"Jules, you're funny. Like unintentionally funny."
"I am?"
"Anyway, you said you think she was flirting with you. What else did she say?" Emily remembered her son was in the car. "Remember, PG."
"Okay well you know that for work I have to go undercover and spy on cheating husbands?"
"Yes. 'They're always cheating.'"
"Exactly. I know the signs to look out for when people are flirting. I can recognize them when I'm working a case," Julie waited a beat. "But when it's happening to me? I get sort of... flustered. And clueless."
"You mean... you're oblivious when a woman is flirting with you," Emily stated matter-of-factly.
"Yes," Julie said curtly.
They were silent for a few moments until Emily let out the loudest, deep-belly laugh.
"I'm so sorry," she tried catching her breath. "It's just hilarious to me. A brilliant, competent detective when it comes to reading other people - but a complete doofus like the rest of us lowly humans when it comes to her own love life. Good to know you're like the rest of us."
"Uhm... thank you?"
"Okay sorry, go on."
"She did the ear tuck thing with her hair. The way she blinked was like... not normal. Like... slowed down? I don't know. She may have also tossed her hair to the side a couple times."
Emily was holding back more laughter. "Julie," she choked out.
"What!"
"Tell me right now, word for word, how she asked you out for your next date."
"How did you kno-"
"Julie, c'mon. She’s so obviously into you."
The other woman sighed, "Word for word? Fine. She said, 'I hope it doesn't take as long for us to have our second date as it did for us to get to this one, Froggy.'"
Damn.
"Wow."
"Yeah," the pacing stopped.
"So? How are you feeling?"
"Are you therapist-practicing on me right now?"
"Ew no. You have to pay me to be your therapist. I'm..." Joel's words rang in her ear.
"I'm asking as your friend, Julie."
Silence again. When Julie took a few more moments to reply, Emily almost started to think about taking back what she said.
"I feel... good," Julie said hesitantly. "Yeah, I feel good about it." Confidence grew with each word. "I'm pretty excited about the second date."
"That's great, Julie. I'm really glad it went well."
"Me too." Emily could hear the smile in Julie's response.
*******
Emily blinked and suddenly, summer break was almost over. Back-to-school conversations with her boys were starting to come up over dinner and Emily caught herself feeling a sense of dread. The kids going back to school was always a bittersweet feeling. Another sobering reminder that they were growing up fast - yet delightful to see them growing more into themselves. But this year, the drop in Emily's stomach at the thought of summer ending wasn't just because of her sons.
After her conversation with Joel, she settled into a role that felt familiar. She fit into it in a way that resembled putting on a dusty, favorite jacket buried deep in the closest. At least once a week, Emily sat in a poorly lit bar with three other women.
Her friends.
She'd spent a few nights at her dads when she was too tired to drive back to Sacramento. Even the mornings when she woke up questioning her life decisions, it was worth it. Especially when she saw with her own eyes, Julie Kovalenko, the certifiably sharp-witted, prim and proper, frosty detective completely melt under Didi's gaze.
It would've been adorable, really. If Emily wasn't so grossed out. Thankfully, she wasn't the only one having to endure Didi and Julie's insufferable flirting because she had Megan to make barf faces with. Emily wasn't even entirely sure if she could call whatever it was they were doing flirting. Sometimes, they were bordering on bullying each other. Bickering, like an old, married couple.
"You should not be petting every stray cat you see. Let alone taking them in, Di."
"Oh that's rich coming from you, Froggy. Little miss 'Save the Opossums!'"
"They're vulnerable wildlife and absolutely harmless!"
"Ugh they're creepy, Jules."
"Cats are creepy too. Opossums are innocent creatures and deserve to be taken care of just like the rest."
"God you're such a freak. It's a good thing you're so cute."
The most that Emily ever saw Julie drink was about three cocktails. And even then, the woman's face refused to flush the way Emily's did when she was drinking. But whenever Didi complimented Julie, just like she did now, her face grew impossibly redder than a tomato.
Megan cleared her throat.
"Speaking of taking in stray animals - Emily, are you staying with your dad tonight? It's almost 9pm," the red head asked.
About two more weeks and her sons would be back in school, then after a few weeks, she would be starting her own classes too. A big part of her didn't want to make the two hour drive back home and selfishly wanted to stay the night in the city. Who knows when the next opportunity would be where she could stay out late with friends in the middle of the week. She felt like a little girl wanting to stay longer at a sleepover party with her friends.
"Yeah, I'll probably head to dad's after this,” she yawned.
"Stay at mine's," Julie offered.
Emily gave her a confused stare. Her dad's was only a 30 minute drive away at most.
"I'm staying with Di tonight. So you can have my place all to yourself. It's only 10 minutes away," the other woman shrugged.
"Are you sure?"
"She's sure," Didi said before she placed a kiss to Julie's cheek.
Red tomato.
Julie stood up abruptly and threw her keys at Emily. "You know where I live." Didi followed suit and waved goodbye haphazardly.
Megan gaped at their friends exiting the bar. "God I swear it's like they're two teenage boys.”
"Trust me, you don't want to know what that's actually like."
Megan shot her a sympathetic look. "Your first official semester as a student is coming up at Wheeler. Are you ready?"
Emily's shoulders drooped as a flood of guilt washed over her. "I'm definitely excited. But ready? Maybe. It's been years since I've been in school as a student." She should be grateful for the opportunity. But when she remembered the stress from undergrad, a part of her wondered why she agreed to do it all again. Now. As a mom with three whole kids.
"You having a little bit of imposter syndrome already?"
"I guess so. Maybe it's that." But there was something else that Emily couldn't quite place her finger on. Because whenever she thought of things changing soon, after she had gotten into a groove over the summer, finding herself in refreshing conversations, sharing warm and genuine laughter with her new friends - she started to feel wobbly.
"You know," Megan gave her a pointed look. "It took me almost two years to earn that," she lifted her chin in the direction of Julie's house keys.
Emily lifted an eyebrow. "Really?"
"Obviously, Julie doesn't let just anyone in."
Maybe they didn't see or talk to each other everyday. They had a few things in common, including their shared desire to have better relationships with their parents. Emily’s friendship with Julie was still so new. She felt silly, like a teenage girl, anxious about her friendships changing.
After graduating high school, Emily and her core group of friends made a pact that they would always stay in touch. No matter how old they grew or where they were in the world. And like a toddler stuck to its caregiver, Emily clung onto the hope that their closeness as friends wouldn't change.
What she didn’t expect was that change wouldn't happen all at once. Not unlike the acquired taste and preference for dark chocolate when one spent an entirety of their young life hating it. Or the way one’s eyes adjusted to a usually bushy tree, naked in the dead of winter. The way one might finally acknowledge the lines on their face over time. Slowly, Emily and her group of friends morphed into something new.
Their plans in the group chat, if they were lucky enough to happen, occurred once every two years. It was something that Emily just came to accept overtime, as with a lot of things that came with getting older. Change was inevitable; the only constant.
"Yeah, I guess that's what makes her so great at her job. Being guarded and careful of people," Emily agreed.
"But she trusts you," Megan held Emily's gaze. "I can see why."
Maybe everything would be okay, even with a little bit of change. Julie seemed to cherish their friendship as much as Emily did.
Her phone lit up on the table and she reached for it to read a text from Julie.
Julie: Don't open my nightstand drawer. Unless you want to be traumatized.
Emily made a face of disgust at Megan before throwing her phone across the booth.
"Ugh, these two are actually worse than my boys."
Megan tossed her head back laughing and cheered, "To our endless love for our teenage boys."
Emily lifted her drink, "To our lovesick friends."
*******
Julie: I think I'm officially in a relationship.
Emily was dozing off at work, even with her trusted upbeat playlist. She welcomed the intriguing text from her friend to pull her out of her sleepy haze.
Emily: You don't sound so sure...
The text bubbles appeared and disappeared for at least three minutes. Growing restless, Emily made a quick decision. It took about two rings for Julie to pick up.
"Spill," Emily commanded.
Julie blew out a breath before pacing, "So Didi came to my office for lunch, as she has been doing for the last few months."
Emily didn't know about that detail.
"And Megan was also out for lunch, so she wasn't at her desk when one of my clients came knocking on my door."
For some reason, Emily was scared about where the story was going.
"Didi and I were sitting on the couch in my office, we weren't doing anything, just eating our salads and probably laughing about something. I don't know. But she definitely had her hand on my knee." Emily's stomach dropped. "The client saw us, probably as thrown off as we are. He looked at the both of us and said, 'Oh. I didn't realize you were on a lunch break with your friend. I can come back later, Ms. Kovalenko.'"
Okay. That wasn't as scary as Emily thought.
"And I don't know what the fuck came over me but before he got the chance to turn around and leave, I blurted out like some kind of fucking lunatic, 'She's not my friend. She's... my girlfriend.'"
Bold.
In some ways, Julie was a very predictable person. She had her structure and was almost always emotionally consistent with her blunt reactions or commentary. In contrast, the other woman still had her ways of surprising people. As Emily imagined the way Julie claimed Didi as her girlfriend, it didn't come as a shock to her. She saw on at least three occasions Julie grow so undeniably jealous whenever a stranger, usually a woman, complimented Didi.
Frankly, Emily wondered how long it would take for either of the two infuriating women to finally get their shit together and put a label on their relationship.
"What did she say?" Emily probed.
"Well my client awkwardly apologized and then excused himself. When he left, she just stared at me."
"She... stared at you."
"And then she said she had to go back to work."
"What?"
"Or actually I think she said, 'I better let my girlfriend get back to work.' I don't know, I think I blacked out."
Emily barked out a laugh that was definitely not office-appropriate. She didn't care though.
"Jules, what an unforgettable relationship-proposal."
"Thanks," Julie murmured.
After getting more laughter out of her system, she heard herself say, "I'm happy for you both. You're good for each other. You're both idiots, is what I'm really saying."
"Has anyone ever told you that you're a really good friend?" sarcasm dripping in every word.
"Oh thank you, I was starting to think you might actually hate me."
"I really do."
Emily ignored her and teased, "So, you have a girlfriend."
"Ugh are you going to be weird about this?"
"Oh, I'm going to be more than weird. I'm going to be so annoying about this. And I can be very annoying, you know. I have three boys, remember?"
Julie groaned, "Great."
"Julie and Didi sitting in a tree. F-U-C-K-I-N-"
"O-kay! This conversation is over."
"Wait, wait, wait!"
"I swear to god if you start singing again, I'm hanging up."
"Are you happy?"
Silence. If they were teenagers and talking on a landline, Emily could imagine Julie twirling the phone chord at this exact moment. But instead of an answer, Julie responded with a question.
"How did you know? With Joel, I mean… how did you know he was the one?"
A smile tugged at Emily's lips. She remembered asking her mom that exact question when she met Joel. It felt like wonder. Like waking up and realizing she wasn't dreaming or making everything up. That she just had to ask to be sure; to know that what she was feeling was real. That she wasn't the only one who had that feeling deep in her gut, that she just knew she met her person.
"At the risk of sounding super corny and cliché, I just knew."
"Well that's not very helpful," Julie muttered. "When I met Didi, I lied about my identity. You met Joel as your authentic selves, so of course you would have a better chance at knowing."
Emily shrugged, "Sure that's true. But eventually, you got to know each other as your genuinely weird, idiotic selves, right?" A thought occurred to Emily. Something clicked.
"I'm going to be super annoying and ask you the same question."
"What question..."
"How did you know?"
"How did I know..."
"That you're in love with Didi."
There was a loud thump on the other line and suddenly Julie was howling profanities from a distance.
"Fuck, I just hit my fucking knee underneath my desk. Thanks a lot, Em."
She stayed silent, choosing to wait for Julie's answer. There was shuffling going on in the background and she could practically hear Julie thinking to herself.
"Are you lying on the floor?" Emily asked.
"I'm not psychotic like Didi. I'm lying down on my office couch."
After a few moments passed, Julie finally concluded, "I'm not in love."
Emily hummed. Julie might be in denial, but at least Emily could do some acceptance.
"Okay, fine. You're not in love with Didi. You're probably right, I'm jumping to conclusions. Sorry."
"Fuck are you reverse psychologizing me now?"
"What is that?"
"Fuck you, Em."
"That's Joel’s job."
Julie groaned and Emily swore the other woman was about ready to hang up on her. But she didn't. Emily had a feeling that Julie already knew the answer to her question.
"I had dinner with my mom a couple of months ago. It was a few days after my third date with Didi." Julie sounded so calm, it felt like Emily was floating on top of a cloud. "There was this awkward moment between me and my mom. She asked me if I was seeing anyone but she had that look in her eye like she already knew the answer. And before I could say anything she told me that I looked really happy lately. Eventually, I told her about Didi and she said she was really happy for me."
They were silent on the phone for a few moments.
"After that dinner, I wanted to go to her. I wanted to drive straight to Didi's apartment and tell her everything." Emily could hear the wonder in her voice. "I've never felt that before. I usually just... want to go back to my place. Curl up on my couch or bed, have a glass of wine, read a book."
Emily could imagine Julie staring up at her office ceiling.
"But I didn't want to do any of that. I wanted to be with her."
"You wanted to go… home," Emily suggested.
There was a confusing mix of feelings that came with helping San Francisco's best private investigator connect the pieces of her puzzled heart together. Emily felt both smug and humbled to be that person.
"Are you going to be like your dad and shoot airguns like you just solved a case?"
"No, because I'm much more mature than him."
"Right, says the woman who was about to sing the 'K-I-S-S-I-N-G' song."
"Maybe I should sing it to Didi instead. She would appreciate it, being that she’s much cooler than you."
“You know, you're like… our very own rude, annoying cheerleader.”
Emily hummed, “I don't think your girlfriend would agree about the ‘rude' part.”
"Speaking of my girlfriend, I'm hanging up now. She's probably waiting for my call."
Emily heard more shuffling in the background along with a new voice. "Someone's got herself a girlfriend," Megan sang.
Another familiar voice rang through Emily’s speaker phone. “Who has a girlfriend?” Charles asked.
“How did this turn into an announcement about my love life?”
“Oh you mean you and Didi?” the older man asked.
“You knew?” Emily and Julie exclaimed simultaneously.
She could hear her dad’s voice approaching Julie's phone speaker as he replied, “Every Tuesday evening for the past three months, Didi has parked her car outside our office at exactly 7:38pm. And on Fridays, she’s out there by 6:49pm. I thought it was kind of weird at first, but then I remembered she and Megan became friends after Thanksgiving dinner.”
“What the fuck…” she heard Julie murmur.
Ignoring her reaction, he continued, “That theory was debunked when I visited Calbert at Pacific View a few weeks ago for lunch. I swear, I saw the strangest thing. Most of the residents know when Didi’s taking a break in her office. There isn’t always a specific time. But everyone knows: lights off, blinds closed - Do Not Disturb Didi.”
“Charles-”
Her dad continued talking over Julie’s protests, “It just so happened that I was walking from the activities room when her office lights came back on - and it was no longer than three seconds after that when I saw a woman, who looked exactly like my boss, walk out Didi’s office.”
Everyone was silent. Julie must have forgotten that Emily was still on the phone.
Breaking the silence, Emily asked, “Did he just shoot the airguns?”
Julie groaned and before she could hang up, Emily yelled into her phone, “Bye, Didi’s girlfriend!”
*******
Midterm exams were ripping Emily a new one. She hit the ground running at the start of Fall semester. And even though her colleagues and professors were overwhelmingly supportive, Emily was ready to fall into a sleep so deep it could carry her over into two lifetimes.
Coming home late three nights a week on top of group projects, papers, and her first set of midterms didn't give her any space to feel anything but exhaustion. It was like she barely had the brain space to think about anything beyond school, work, and the next day. Taking things one day at a time had its benefits and also its costs. It seemed like life was moving on around her but she couldn't keep up.
She just finished a brain-frying exam when she decided to sneak in a quick break at her office before the next midterm. But her legs stopped working and she blinked rapidly as she took in the sight of dark curly hair standing in front of her desk. Was she so sleep deprived that she was hallucinating her friend?
“Didi?”
The other woman smiled and wrapped her in a warm embrace. Didi's hugs were the best. She always had the tightest grip with arms so strong it felt like she could fight off an entire gang of criminals.
“She's alive!”
Emily playfully pushed Didi away but held onto her arms, “What are you doing here?” It was probably two weeks at most, but it felt like ages since she saw any of her friends. “Shouldn't you be at work? Wait, what day is it again… I'm so disoriented these days, it's not even funny.”
“It's December 25, 2033. Our president is a butch lesbian and everyone has free healthcare. Also, I'm here for my holiday gift.”
“I know you're joking but that actually sounds incredible. Why are you out here at Wheeler anyway?”
“I'm here with Dr. Ben. He and a couple of residents from the book club are here to see a guest speaker for the English department. Figured I'd drive them and stop by to see you."
Emily was momentarily distracted by a mouthwatering aroma coming from somewhere in her office. Her stomach made an embarrassingly loud growl and Didi visibly fought down a laugh. She moved aside to reveal a takeout bag and a refreshing fruit drink sitting on Emily's desk.
"Wait, did you bring me lunch?"
"Technically, Jules ordered it and Joel told us what your favorite Filipino dish was. So I picked it up on the way. Team effort?"
Emily could cry. She was so exhausted and probably operating on one functioning brain cell that she didn't realize how hungry she was.
"Stay and catch me up on everything I've missed out on while I scoff down the food you so graciously got for me?"
Her senses were busy being filled with the savory scents of garlic, soy sauce, vinegar, and chicken cooked perfectly together that she didn't have the capacity to feel guilty from Didi's updates. Mouth full and preoccupied, Emily nodded along as Didi shared about the plans for Julie's Not-So-Surprise Surprise birthday party. She vaguely remembered Julie telling her over a quick phone call about her suspicions of a surprise birthday party being planned behind her back.
"Megan and your dad keep shushing each other whenever she walks into a room," Didi grinned. "She really thinks they're hiding something from her."
"You guys are concerningly thrilled at the opportunity to deceive a private detective."
"Imagine pranking your boss who hates being surprised? Letting her think she's about to walk into the worst birthday celebration?" Didi snorted so loud she made herself laugh even harder.
Emily almost felt bad for Julie. Almost.
"I want in. What can I do to help make her more miserable," she heard herself ask. Was this how it felt like having a sibling? Wanting to participate in any opportunity that led to their distress? Strangely, she felt like she could finally relate to her sons in that sense.
She and Didi devised a plan so that Emily would send Julie a “wrong text” that was supposedly meant for Megan about the nonexistent surprise party. It was all very genius. And evil.
Julie: If you don't tell me what everyone is up to, I'm buying one of your kids a drumset
Emily: Jokes on you, we already have one *lips sealed emoji*
On the night of Julie’s birthday, Didi sent Emily a selfie.
Didi: Everything went according to plan. She refused to walk through the door *laughing emoji*
Didi: She slapped me when she finally saw everything *dead emoji*
Emily scrolled up to look at the photo. Julie waved at the camera several feet behind Didi, catching up in her roller skates. She zoomed in to see a table for two with empty wine glasses, red, and white rose petals scattered throughout the floor. Candles lit the vacant roller skating rink, the same location where Julie and her sister used to frequent when they were younger.
With the help of an inside connection from one of her residents, Didi rented out the entire space just for the two of them.
Emily: Glad everything worked out
Didi: She still hates everyone for tricking her *crying laughing emoji*
Emily: It’s a good thing she loves you
*******
The following week, Emily had some free time when her last class was canceled. In a quick, spur of the moment decision, she set the GPS to Kovalenko Investigations. She was so excited to see Julie and her dad after weeks of everyone being buried in work and school. When she traced her steps later to the moments leading up to opening Julie's office door, Emily cursed herself for not noticing the first and most obvious sign. Megan wasn't at her desk. The second sign she missed was that the blinds of Julie's office were closed.
Emily knocked, she always knocked. But she swore she heard noises and shuffling from behind the door.
"Hello? Julie?"
When she heard more shuffling but no answer, she turned the knob of the unlocked door. Emily had three teenage kids. She'd seen a lot of gross teenage boy behavior: Wyatt refusing to shower for a week, Jace fluffing the dandruff from his hair onto his brothers, Nico smelling his own hand after scratching his armpit.
But nothing could have prepared Emily for the nightmarish sight of watching her friend half naked on her desk with her girlfriend between her legs.
"Oh my god what the fuck?!"
Emily slammed the door shut and covered her eyes with both her hands, hoping the gesture might completely erase the memory. It didn't.
"The fuck, Em?!" Julie cried from behind the door.
The most upsetting part of it all was Didi laughing like a maniac.
Emily put a hand to her chest, her heart pounding from embarrassment and yelled, "You know what, I was never here. This never happened. I'm going to leave and we're never speaking of this."
"Fucking go, then!"
Didi was still laughing.
Emily wouldn't let Julie have the last word. Rushing out of the office, Emily yelled, "Lock your fucking office up, you asshole!"
*******
"He says he's a really good in the kitchen - oh and he's writing a fictional book where his main character, an old truck driver, discovers he's the father of a hitchhiker he picks up cross country. Only to find out his estranged kid wants to murder him."
"Megan..."
"Seriously Megs, where are you finding these guys?" Emily bit into her burger. Julie was stealing another one of Didi's french fries who was pretending, yet again, to be annoyed.
"We know exactly where she met this one," Didi swatted Julie's hand from her plate.
"Didi got a new tattoo last week," Julie nibbled on a fry.
"I tagged along," the red head said smugly. "Just wanted to see if I liked any of the artist's styles, maybe get one myself."
"A tattoo or an artist?" Didi snorted.
"Both, apparently," Julie retorted.
It made sense that the universe brought Megan and Julie together. In their own ways, both women were so unusual. It reminded Emily of cartoons where bizarre characters were strange individually on their own. But in a pair, they fit well together. Like Lilo and Stitch.
"Wait what tattoo did you get, Di?" Emily asked.
Megan tossed her head back laughing. "Oh you're going to love this."
Suddenly, Didi was pulling down the top right of her shirt to reveal her shoulder. Emily covered her mouth to suppress an tyrannical laugh when she saw the brightest red lips in a kissing shape.
"Oh dear god, that's not- those aren't Julie's actual lips, are they?!"
Grasping a bottle of beer in one hand and shaking Emily's shoulder with the other, Megan kept laughing uncontrollably. "It's so tacky! Didi, I can't believe you actually got that."
"Says the bitch that impulsively got one that same day of a fucking skull on her breast!" Julie shrieked.
Emily's burger was growing cold. "You got a what?"
It was Megan's turn to show her new tattoo and Emily nearly slid down her seat underneath the table. "Isn't it cute? Almost as cute as the guy who drew it on me. Guys, he could be the one."
Everyone seemed to groan at the same time while Megan smugly sipped her drink.
There must have been some kind of poison or magic in her drink or her burger because Emily swore she imagined hearing the next words that Julie said out loud.
"Maybe she's right."
"What?" everyone but Julie jumped.
The brunette shrugged and gazed warmly at Didi. "You never know where you'll find love. Sometimes, you just have to trust that it's out there and that it'll come to you when the time is right."
"As I live and breathe. Julie Kovalenko giving me advice on love," the red head stared at Julie.
"What can I say? I'm practically married."
Didi spat out her drink. Emily had no idea how Julie felt about marriage. But of course Didi had to have some kind of idea about where Julie stood. From the look on her face now though, it seemed like Megan and Emily were going to be part of a very interesting conversation between the couple.
"Y-you're practically what now?" Didi stammered.
"Well we've been together almost two years now. This is the longest relationship I've ever been in. I'm basically your wife."
Emily and Megan shared a wide eyed look as their friends continued their very intimate discussion.
"My... wife," Didi looked stunned as she heard the words leave her lips.
Someone coughed and Emily wasn't sure if it was either her or Megan. Emily looked at Julie and asked, "So like, hypothetically speaking, if you were to get engaged... how would you want to be proposed to? Or would you do the proposing... hypothetically?"
Julie stole another one of Didi's fries who, still in shock, stopped complaining about her fries being stolen.
"You guys might find this surprising about me, but I wouldn't completely hate a public proposal. Nothing super attention grabbing like a fucking flash mob or anything like that. So that answers the first question. And your second question-" she smiled at Didi.
"That's a card I'm going to have to keep close to my chest."
*******
“Flight 0518 to Honolulu will be boarding shortly. We will begin the boarding process starting with our First Class members, followed by Business Class, and family boarding. All remaining passengers, please stay seated until your group is called. Thank you again for flying with Southwest.
The brightness on her phone automatically lit up to its maximum brightness as she opened her wallet app, swiping to view her boarding pass. It was a fantasy that she and Joel dreamed about from the beginning of their relationship, but never got the chance to fulfill until now. Two weeks into her second semester at Wheeler, Didi planted an idea in Emily's mind that would soon blossom into reality.
She and Julie were eating sushi one night when Didi appallingly discovered that her girlfriend never tried poke. It revived an earlier (and apparently embarrassing) conversation the couple had about Hawaii and Didi suggested that if Julie were to try poke for the first time, she had to do it right. And there was no better place to do it than on a beach in Hawaii.
Didi told Emily about their rough plans to take two weeks off in April - right around Emily's spring break. It was perfect. Before she knew it, she and Didi were planning a group trip to Hawaii together with their partners.
Emily looked down at her phone to see an incoming Facetime call from her dad.
“Hey, dad. The boys haven't locked you out or burned everything to the ground yet, have they?”
“No no, we're all doing fantastic here. We just wanted to say hi to you and Joel before you guys board.”
“Hey mom!” Nico jumped into the frame.
Joel leaned over her shoulder to join the call, “Hey guys.”
“I still can't believe you guys are abandoning us,” she heard Wyatt yell somewhere in the background.
“Aw, we'll miss you too, bud,” Joel teased.
“Oh don't pretend you're not thrilled that your parents are out of town,” Emily countered.
Charles faced the camera directly under his nose, “They're doing great by the way. Jace showed me how to make Filipino spaghetti. And Nico kept talking about how his mom knows how to cook the pasta just right so it's not too soft or too firm.”
“I knew they would miss us. Is it bad that I don't feel so guilty leaving them?” Emily asked her dad.
“No, not bad at all. I think it means that you trust your kids to leave them with their elderly grandpa.”
“That, or I'm in desperate need of a vacation from life.”
“That too,” Charles chuckled.
“Now boarding Group B. All passengers in Group B for Flight 0518 to Honolulu, please prepare your boarding passes and welcome aboard.”
“Alright dad, that's us,” the line for their group grew longer by the second. She felt the butterflies flutter in her stomach. “Thanks again for watching our boys. You’ll be paid back in tons of chocolate covered macadamias and Hawaiian coffee beans.”
“Can't wait. Have fun!”
Before switching her phone off to airplane mode, she received a text notification from Didi with an image attached.
Didi: Have a safe flight & see you guys soon!
Didi: Gonna have to drag this frog out the fucking ocean
In her selfie, Didi wore a matching black sports bikini top over swim trunks and her short hair was slicked back like she just got out of the water. Tan lines ran down her shoulders, a testament of how much time she and Julie spent under the sun from the last five days. Emily zoomed into the photo and smiled as she stared at an ant-sized Julie in a red two piece, knee deep in the water.
Emily: You guys have been killing me with your pics ever since you got there. Can't wait to push both of you into the pool
Emily: See you soon
Flying thousands of feet in the air, soaring between the clouds, Emily thought of her mom.
Of how she would be proud of her and her dad; going back to get her master's in her late 30s and her dad starting an entirely new professional chapter of his life. Each of them, finding community and connection in the most unexpected places. Both of them, trying their best to repair the broken pieces of their relationship as father and daughter - even through their waves of grief.
Both, living proof that it’s never too late.