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Endless. That was the word that could have described Naruto and Sasuke’s love for each other. They had seen each other grow up, the embarrassing phases, the darkest times, but nothing could have prepared them for the inevitable. Naruto loved Sasuke so much, truly, that some would say he was possessive over Sasuke. Even a small joke made about the other man led to a lecture on why Sasuke is the way he is. Though, Naruto knew deep down he couldn’t protect Sasuke anymore. It started getting bad when Itachi passed away. Sasuke delved into habits he used to, shutting down, fighting, and drinking. It was too much for Naruto; he loved him deeply, and he tried…he tried and tried and tried to get the love of his life to help, but Sasuke wouldn’t listen. One day, when Naruto was trying to get Sasuke to stop drinking, they got into an argument. Things escalated quickly, and Sasuke hit Naruto. Naruto knew he couldn’t do this anymore, and it was starting to hurt him, so they did the inevitable. They broke up, mutually, some would say. Some would say it was one-sided, and some would say they never wanted to do this. Now no one will know the truth.
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6 months.. It’s been 6 months, and Sasuke was lying in bed. He doesn’t remember the last time he even had the energy to take a shower. He lifted his head up and immediately felt the worst hangover he’s had yet pounding through his head. He glanced at the time, 5 pm, great, another day wasted. He rolled over and searched for his phone, but there was no text from anyone he cared for other than Sakura. He opened it for the first time in what felt like weeks but in reality was only a couple of hours. He first opened his text messages to answer Sakura, who tried to be there for him through this tough time. Sakura knew how much Sasuke loved Naruto, and even though she knew Sasuke hated her, she wanted to be a friend to him. After he finished responding to her, he opened his social media. He couldn’t block Naruto, yet it wasn’t in his blood. He scrolled through his feed until his eyes widened and he felt tears immediately well up in them. His heart felt as if he had been stabbed straight through his chest, and his nausea coursed through his nerves. He immediately reached for his trash can and threw up. He couldn’t believe his eyes. He shakily picked up his phone, taking one gulp before he looked. The photo was of Naruto, who looked healthier than ever, and his new partner. Hinata Hyuuga. Sasuke has always hated Hinata since high school, when she tried to actively get with Naruto while they were dating.
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The emotions wouldn’t stop, and now it felt as if Sasuke was moving on autopilot. He deleted social media and then turned his phone off. He stood up, and he walked to his desk that was littered with all his art supplies. He looked through the mess and found a piece of paper and a semi-sharpened pencil, and he sat down. He looked out the small window, and he began to write like he used to. The letters back then, though, were love letters for Naruto; this was something different, something that came from the deepest parts of Sasuke.
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“It’s a beautiful afternoon. The sky is what you would call our colors, beautiful shades of orange and purple that mix with intensity. I’m sitting at my desk, and I wish I knew how to write this in a way that seemed coherent, but I can’t. Naruto, if you’re reading this, I am sorry. I want you to know that you have always been the love of my life and my best friend. Your smile can brighten 1000 Earths just on its own. Your personality could make anyone smile and feel comfortable, and that’s what drew me to you in the first place. I’ll never forget when you tried to hit on me for the first time and your corny pick-up line about ramen. It was so terrible that I laughed in your face, and you looked so cute when you got embarrassed. Some days I wish I could restart. I would do things so differently for you because I realized everything is my fault. I am so, so sorry for everything, Naruto. Though it pains me, I am so happy to see that you’re doing well. Live your life and live it up the way you’re supposed to. I only have one more request, and it’s to remember me. Don’t let my name die in your heart, Naruto. You have never done anything wrong, my love. Goodbye, Naruto.”
- Sasuke, your dobe
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Sasuke sealed the letter in a nice purple envelope and made his way to Naruto's place. He knew Naruto wasn’t home at this time and was either at work or the gym, so he knocked on the door. As he expected, Hinata opened it and looked shocked. “Sasuke? What are you doing here?” Hinata looked suspicious and worried when she saw Sasuke. All Sasuke did was smile and give her a letter, “It’s got Naruto, and congrats on your relationship,” he waved and walked away. Hinata's voice got caught in her throat. She saw the emptiness in his eyes when he smiled and the brokenness in his voice when he spoke. If only she had asked him to stay and have dinner and talk, maybe she could have changed what happened.
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Sasuke went to the cliff by the beach, where he and Naruto would vanish to when things got hard. He sat on the edge and watched the last sunset, letting his face feel the crisp air, hit his face, leaving behind a sting that hurt so good. Just like how he felt with Naruto. It was an activity the two did together, coming to this spot to watch the sunset and just exist for a moment. His emotions that were once so heavy in his heart and brain ceased to exist.
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Naruto got back from work and was exhausted. He set down his bag and hung his coat up. “Hinata, I’m ho- Hinata?” He saw his girlfriend, who was reading the letter as if something was eating her alive. She read it with tears in her eyes and her hand over her mouth. Naruto rushed over and grabbed the letter to read it. As his eyes skimmed over the words, he felt his heart break with each word. His body started to shake, and when he got to the signature, nothing could stop him. Without saying a word to Hinata, he stormed out and got in the car. He knew where Sasuke would be, and he didn’t care who would try to pull him over as he rushed to the cliff. He couldn’t be late, he just couldn’t. “Sasuke, please…” his voice said softly as he tried to hold his tears back. He arrived at the spot, and he ran up the cliff, and he saw the all-familiar loving figure that still set fire to his heart.
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Sasuke heard a card door slam shut, as he stood up and got ready to jump into the dark blue waves that were now starting to turn black due to the night. Footsteps were rushing behind him, and then a loud and sharp “SASUKE PLEASE DON’T” came out. Sasuke froze, and he turned his head to see the familiar sunshine. Sasuke smiled at Naruto, and his final words to him were “I love you, idiot”. Sasuke then jumped. Naruto couldn’t grab his hand; he fell too fast. All he could do was scream and shout until his voice hurt as he watched Sasuke's body hit the dark water with a splash that felt as if it went through him instead. He could see Sasuke crying a small tear glinted from the moonlight and Naruto could do nothing as he watched Sasuke’s body sink into the water. His last words rang through his head like a church bell as he fell to his knees. “I love you, idiot”, “I love you, idiot”, “I love you…”, “I love you”. Naruto stared at the spot where Sasuke sank into the water and could only think “I love you too dobe". All the loving memories of the two were playing in Naruto’s head as if he was the one who jumped. Tears fell to the ground as he reached for his phone to call 911.
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It’s been a year now. Naruto and Hinata are married, but Hinata can’t help but notice how the Naruto she once knew is no longer there, but an empty husk of what once was. They were visiting Sasuke's grave. It was an everyday thing for Naruto, but Hinata felt she needed to tag along. She opened her mouth, “Naruto,” yet he didn’t respond, just staring at the ground. It’s been too long since she’s heard his voice, since she seen him smile, since she seen a hint of the sunshine that ignited everyone. The last time she heard even a word come out of his mouth was their wedding night when he said “I do,” with the coldest tone. She decided to walk away to give him his space. Naruto lifted his head up to look at the sky once more, which was filled with intense orange and purple, and he felt tears fall down his face. “Even in the afterlife, you won’t leave me alone, will you?”