Chapter Text
Haymitch shook over the sink, knuckles white, clutching at the porcelain counter. It hated every second of the mornings when all he could see was Wellie's small body, Ampert's bones. The scattered memories of bloodied bodies dress in different colours.
His Ma would have known what to do. But she and Sid were dead. Along with Pa and the twins.
He looked into the darkened mirror, his eyes were blood shot and pooling with tears. Why did he win, why couldn’t it have been Maysliee, she would have been the worst victor possible. Now he was just like every other victor, in Snow's control out of fear for his love’s life. He couldn't let his song bird die like his family.
Lenore Dove walked up slowly behind him, wrapping her slender arms around his waist, resting her head on his shoulders. She had snuck into his new -empty- house in the night. Tam Amber would have never let her see him after all the trouble he caused. She was so warm and patient with Haymitch, it was more than he deserved.
Haymitch turned around to face her and he let his tears fall finally into the arms of his love. Lenore Dove ran her fingers through his blonde curls, humming sweetly. They broke apart, she cradled his face. Lenore dove tenderly kissed the salty tears from his cheeks. At the touch of her lips, Haymitch smiled, “I love you,” he whispered.
She repeated back at him, “we should get breakfast” she stated.
“I haven’t bought any food” Haymitch was reluctant to leave the house and have to face the families of the other tributes whom he knew would ask him questions. “ We can go out to the bakery after we get dressed,” Lenore Dove said. He nodded, kissing her.
It was not sunny at 12. It was never sunny these days, fall was coming and seam families were preparing for the harsh winter that would come faster than anyone liked. Haymitch had put on a stone blue sweater that he had been gifted by the McCoys, and a pair of thick cedar trousers. Lenore Dove was wearing her usual get up of scarfs and patterns. She squeezed his hand tightly in hers. She was still there, he would never let Snow take his dove from him.
Ortho Mellark was standing behind the counter of the bakery, smiling warmly as they walked in. Haymitch only bought a loaf of rye bread, but he knew that Ortho had snuck in a couple more rolls into his basket for free. He looked away as they passed the Donner’s candy shop. He could barely look at the bubblegum pink counter and blue striped uniforms that his sister hated. Lenore Dove held Haymitch together, walking steadily away from the store.
Merilee ran to catch up, turning to end up in front of Haymitch. She held out her arm, holding two bags of candy. Rainbow gumdrops and yellow taffy. Sid's favourite. “Please take this Haymitch”
He couldn’t. In that moment he couldn't look at Merrilee, let alone reach out to take her gift. But he didn’t have to, his girl did. “Thank you Merrilee,” she said. Merrilee nodded, she was going to cry if she stayed there any longer, and ran back to her candy store.
At the grocery, he bought three green apples, a jar of olives, five carrots, four potatoes, a small portion of ham and a sack of oats. At the hob, he bought a hare off of Burdoch. Burdoch hugged him and joked about having to break into his house one of these days.
Haymitch was exhausted when he got home. He just wanted to crawl back into the safety of his girl's arms and lay in bed for hours. Until the waking nightmares evaporated. He knew that wouldn't happen yet.
Lenore Dove and him ate their sandwiches in the living room. Cuddled up in comforting silences. They cleaned up the kitchen and put away the rest of the groceries after they were done. Will this be what the rest of my life is like? Haymitch thought, putting the rest of the ham into the fridge with the carrots, apples and olives. People looking at him with pity, sadness, fear. He had killed people, maybe he should fear himself.
Knock knock. This startled Haymitch away from these thoughts. It’s Snow, he is going to kill her. “Lenore Dove Baird, I know you are in there” Clerk Carmine called through the door. Haymitch opened the door for him.
He scolded Lenore Dove for sneaking out, but he did seem relieved that he wasn’t in jail this time. Haymitch listened by the door as the two argued on the front porch.
“Please, I don’t want to leave him again,” she said. “Please, I just want you home where I know you are safe” Carmine retorted.
“ I am safe with Haymitch, and I’m not a child,” she pleaded, “ please, we can come over for supper”
Carmine gave in at that, “fine, Tam amber expect you two home at 5:00 for supper”
He gave Haymitch a fatherly nod and left back to the meadow.
Haymitch held her for a long time, swaying her back and forth, “ I love you like all fire” he kissed her. “What do you want to do now?” Lenore Dove asked. Big brown eyes that Haymitch would stare into for the rest of his life if he could. “A bath maybe, this place got all sorts of heated water” in truth, he could care less about heating, he just wanted to relax his hot water with his love.
Effie had sent Haymitch a care package from the capitol with all sorts of luxury care products. Hair ointments, creams, perfumes. Lenore Dove picked up the little card she had sent with it, “Love Effie Trinket, should I be jealous?” she joked. He placed his hands on her hips, “Effie is a lovely lady but she’s not my girl.” He kissed her again, letting her pull off his shirt. Haymitch let the water reach the middle of the tub, before helping her into the warm water, then sliding himself in. He rested his head onto her collar bone. Lenore Dove’s skin was soft and so very familiar. It put him at ease so quickly. Haymitch kissed the hollow of her throat, she exhaled deeply, finger running through his hair. God he loved her more than anything. Just being here with her was almost too much for him. She must have been one of those angels she talked about. “ Let's try some of these fancy ointments," she said. They smoothed over Haymitch’s hair flat to his scalp and lathered up. Lenore Dove enjoyed using the layer to shape his hair to little spikes, giggling to herself. He peppers more kisses all over her.
Haymitch washed the ointment out of his hair and properly scrubbed his skin and Lenore Dove’s with a soap that smelled like crisp apples.
They laid dry in new clothes in Haymitch’s bed lovingly kissing until 5:00 pm rolled around. Tam Amber made vegetable stew for dinner. They ate it with boiled bread dumplings and milk. Haymitch didn’t drink the milk. After dinner, they started up a small kitchen party. Lenore Dove on her tune box, singing away and Tam Amber with his strings. Haymitch bobbed his head aimlessly just listening, until a song floated into his head.
Ladybug, ladybug fly away home
Your house is one fire , your children are gone
All except one, who answers to Nan
She’s hiding under the frying pan
The district 11 song that Maysilee and him had modified for the hedge. He began to hum the tune before singing it softly to himself. “ Where do you learn that one?” asked Clerk Carmine. “ Some friends from eleven taught it to me but they say Mockingjay, not lady bug” Lenore Dove got Haymitch to sing it again, while she played the melody.
She hugged him tightly outside of her front door. “ Come to the meadow Tomorrow Mornin’ alright”. Haymitch nodded against her shoulder, “ I love you like all fire” she said, giving him a good night kiss.