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The lights of Nimbasa City are spectacular. Of course, it’s one of the things the city's known for.
Touya generally doesn't try to hide the fact he's a bumpkin from the sticks, but it’s times like this he couldn’t be more obvious he tried. Every few steps something catches his eye– a unique building, a bright sign, advertisements for shows and games and products he’s never heard of before. And it might’ve been a little embarrassing, if Touya was in any state of mind to think about it.
Those Team Plasma grunts had fled to the amusement park– and left a trail of destruction and disgruntled people in their wake. That was what he was supposed to be focused on. That’s why he broke into a hard run as soon as the surprise wore off. It shouldn’t have been that difficult to find them…
Touya has to find them. Because here he is, trying to play the hero again. He's only been a trainer for a few months, and maybe it’s the three badges in his case getting to his head, but Touya's never been anything before. If he’s put in the position to help, why shouldn’t he? It was bad enough what Bianca had gone through with Team Plasma in Castelia City. He won’t stand by and let it happen to someone else.
… But he’d had Iris and Burgh’s help in Castelia. And Cheren and Bianca were gone. Touya was all on his own this time.
And they’ve already gotten away once.
The amusement park’s neon gates rush up to meet him. Pink, yellow, blue– the summer night is thick in his lungs, and Touya’s breathing hard as he pushes into the crowd, taken by the neon tide with the rest of them.
He does a quick sweep of the surroundings, what he can see between and around the shifting bodies. Ticket booths and gift stalls, fountains. Beds of vibrant flowers and shaped hedges, a large Pikachu sculpture, lit up like a star. Many, many people, but none dressed in that tell-tale armor and chainmail–
"Ah."
It's Touya who says it. And in front of him stands a familiar figure, calm and still amidst the crowd. The expression on N’s face is unreadable when their gazes meet. And Touya gets the uncanny sense that the crowds had parted just for him, just for this moment.
"Touya." N greets him, measured and cool. His eyes crinkle up when he smiles, but his gaze is as flat as ever, like staring into the surface of a very still pool. "You're here. Fate sees fit to draw us together again. Did you come to challenge the gym?"
To the unprepared, N’s breakneck pace of speech hits like a full-bodied Take Down. Somehow Touya is almost used to it at this point. He shakes his head. N's smile falls, and two things happen at once.
The first, the step he takes, closing the gap between them in an abrupt instant. And N slipping something away in the back pocket of his jeans, the second. The motion is so slight, so quick, Touya only catches it by nature of being so taken aback by the first that he even registers the oddity, the secrecy, blink-and-miss-it gone.
"You're looking for Team Plasma, right? I heard they'd been spotted in the area again." N says smoothly, drawing Touya’s attention back like a lure. "I can help you look, if you'd like."
Touya’s eyes flick up to his face– he’s very close now. Touya takes a half-step back. And N doesn’t move, no closer, no farther. Only gives him a polite smile, a slight incline of the head. The very picture of gallant. And Touya could use the help but something keeps him from accepting right away.
He isn't sure why. But whenever he's around N there's always a… a wariness that simmers in him. A nerve he can't shake. It’s not that Touya doesn’t want to trust him, because he does. He wants that quite badly, actually, for no real reason other than that he is unlike anyone Touya has ever met before.
But the truth of the matter is that even when he's right there within reach, N doesn't always seem real. Not– present. That he exists somewhere else at any given time, someplace remote, intangible. What he’s really thinking about, or feeling, or wanting, it’s all so above Touya’s head. He’s never given Touya reason to believe him dishonest, and yet he’s so mysterious. What does Touya really know about him?
He looks at N. N, who is still watching him back. The fullness of his attention is unsettling, perfect and unwavering. Like he’s already figured everything out but wants to watch it happen anyways.
And yet.
Touya nods. And after a brief moment, N returns it, the pleased little grin he sports sending Touya’s stomach into a daring swoop.
N turns, and without hesitation, begins to walk. So Touya follows. N keeps the lead and that leaves Touya to keep up the search for Team Plasma. But try as he might, Touya still finds his eyes wandering, taken by all the glimmering sights around them. There's nothing like this back home; the huge rides, packed booths, costumed workers and goers alike– and his strange companion too, of course.
Touya keeps sneaking peeks at him from under the brim of his cap. He can't help it. It’s strange seeing N like this. Close. Casually. Or, well– as casual as you can be searching for known criminals. The lights of the amusement park are so bright they cast away even the shadow of N's hat, warming the high roundness in his cheeks, catching the sharp line of his nose. They shift as he tilts his head, eyes over the ground but also on the rides and the sky, full of a sort of wonder that makes him seem so young. Touya always had the impression N was older than him, what with his height and inflection and confidence. But it's easy to forget that, looking at him now. He doesn’t feel as bad either, if they’re both getting distracted.
Touya wonders if it’s N’s first time here too.
"Where are your friends?" N asks after a little while, without preamble.
The pressing of the crowd has gradually nudged them together, and Touya has to tilt his head back to look up at him. "Dewott, Petilil, and Blitzle are right here."
"No, no I mean–" The rest of the sentence crashes to a stop as he wheezes, breath catching like a laugh without enough force to hit properly. A moment later N clears his throat, mouth twisting into a wry smile. “I am aware your Pokémon are still within their balls. I was referring to the other two. Your human friends.”
His tone is off. But Touya just shrugs, because he doesn’t know. N nods anyway, seeming to understand.
"Have you ever been to Anville Town?" He asks next, just as abruptly.
Touya hasn't been to most places. He shakes his head.
N perks up a little. It’s Unova’s main railway hub, he informs Touya. Turns out he's never been either, not that Touya would've known it with how N talks about the place. Trains are a fascination for him.
“Machines of all sorts,” he clarifies, “But I’d never seen a real train before recently. I’d like to visit Anville Town and see all the trains there one day. Traveling by train sounds wonderful. And getting to see the mechanics of one as it operates up close would be excellent as well…”
Quite impressively, he goes on. Words have never come easily to Touya. Especially not as easily as they do to N, who never seems to lack things to say. In the handful of times they've met, he's almost always been the one doing all the talking. Touya doesn't mind it though. N doesn't seem to mind it either, when Touya doesn't know what to say back. He carries the conversation for them both.
And then mid-thought, N’s gaze comes down from the sky, landing on Touya with all their blue gravity once more. “Have you ever ridden a train, Touya?”
He does that too– doubling back every now and again to check that Touya is still following along.
It does an odd thing to Touya. Makes his stomach flop over itself like an agitated Stunfisk.
He shakes his head. N just hums. Still unbothered. Still understanding.
Over N’s shoulder, Touya’s eye catches on a bright sign advertising commemorative electric-type cups– and the clock displayed in the corner of it. More time has passed than he’d realized. And still no luck.
Touya bites the inside of his cheek. He’s been looking. He really has. There's just too many people. And despite the stand-out nature of the knight uniforms, he knows from having to comb through Pinwheel Forest that they can blend in surprisingly well when they want to.
At his side, N glances out over the crowd, a thoughtful expression on his face.
"I think this is the most time we've ever spent together."
It's nearly wistful, the way he says it. But it prickles something in Touya. Why he says it like it matters, suddenly.
And then he turns, nodding upward. "They're not here. Let's ride the Ferris wheel and see if we can spot them from up there."
Touya glances up and realizes they've wandered near the giant Ferris wheel at the center of the park– the Rondez-View, if he remembers correctly. It's not a bad idea.
"I love Ferris wheels. The circular motion... the mechanics... They're like collections of elegant formulas." N continues contemplatively. He hums, shoulders rising and falling like it's the first full breath he’s taken in a while. And then he looks back down to Touya. "Well. Shall we go up?"
Somehow they’re the only people in line. The attendant waits for them to approach before opening the Pokeball-shaped carriage’s door. N strides onward, boarding without a backward glance, and Touya glances briefly at the Couples Only sign before following. The carriage lists to one side as he climbs in, and Touya’s stomach is doing that strange Stunfisk flop again with N’s cool eyes regarding him as he fumbles into his seat.
Sounds from below fall away as they start to rise. A low bustling drone and the creak of circulating metal fills whatever space the humid summer air spares, a sensory thickness that really isn’t so bad so much as it a constant reminder that they are in an enclosed capsule completely alone together. Touya wipes nervously at the dampness collecting under his jaw, and N rests his elbow on the carriage’s window sill, head tipped down and chin settled in the palm of his hand.
And Touya realizes N isn't looking. Not really. His eyes are glassy when they catch the light. Whatever he sees is far off, not on the crowded neon ground below, and Touya isn't really looking either. Not looking at anything except the boy across from him in the golden half-light. Waiting for what comes next.
N’s voice, when he speaks, sounds like a lone line cast into a great sea. Solitary and stalwart, reaching into something vast.
"First, I must tell you... I am the King of Team Plasma." His eyes flick over the world beneath them, the shadows of eyelashes falling long and dark on his cheeks. "Ghetsis asked me to work with him to save all Pokemon."
Hearing it is like tripping into free-fall. A dip in his stomach, shock stealing a painful beat from Touya’s heart. The sudden disorienting knowledge that up is down and down is up, and yet none of it matters, in the end, when you’re hurtling through empty air.
Face eerily serene, N blinks against the light as he ponders, almost to himself, "I wonder how many Pokemon exist in this world..."
And there's so much empty air. A chill descends upon Touya. High up, and all alone.
Touya’s mind wheels, trying and failing to find its balance in this conversation that has begun and ended so fast. He feels lost. Left behind. He doesn’t understand. Why this, why now? Why me–?
"...Why?"
N looks away from the window, odd serenity broken by Touya's croak.
"Why, what?" He echoes, clipped and belittling. "I think only of and want what's best for all Pokemon. That is the only 'why' I need." A curious smile crosses his lips. "Or is it 'why' you?"
And then he sits back, gaze dismantling Touya slowly as his fingers weave themselves together, falling to his lap. "In truth, I don’t have an answer. I'm not sure why I was drawn to you that day in Accumula Town. You certainly don't stand out in a crowd.”
If N takes any pleasure from the flinch that crosses Touya’s face, he doesn’t show it. He continues.
"Perhaps it is just that... I find myself drawn inexorably towards hope." And there is a spark in those pale blue eyes, the first flicker of life in his reflection-flat gaze all evening. "The desire to believe in something is very normal, isn't it?"
The ember is small, and yet it brings a new severity to him. And suddenly Touya feels as if he's meeting him for the first time all over again. Or perhaps, that he hadn't truly met him before now.
When N smirks there is a sharpness to it, a callousness, a carelessness, like there's no sense in hiding his intentions now as he points them at Touya's throat. "Could it be that you have a dream you'd do anything to accomplish as well?"
There’s a lot that passes through the moment after N’s question. Touya with the open well of his insides, quiet and spiraling, the way N stares at him, intense, searching. The Pokeball-shaped carriage circles on. And they might as well have had sole occupancy of the world here, an indisputable place carved into each other as that moment draws long within this twilight space. Somehow, Touya knows. Nothing will ever be the same after this.
Inevitably, the ride slows. And that space closes. Touya doesn’t know if he wants to hold this moment open a while longer or to break it into pieces, make something he can at least attempt to deal with, something he can handle. The only thing he can think to do is battle him. But they can’t do that up here. So he keeps looking only at N and N keeps looking at what only he can see.
Touya says nothing. Can say nothing. And eventually N only shakes his head. Disappointed.
The ride finally slides to a stop. N alights to the ground first, leaving Touya behind as the thunderous sound of footsteps rush the ride.
"My Lord N!"
"You're safe, sire!"
Two Plasma grunts, their armor made brilliant by neon. They look at N and it really sinks in at that moment. That they are his and he is theirs and all of this is real.
"There's no problem." N waves an arm at them curtly. "You're part of the people we brought in to save the Pokemon. So right now you're under my protection as well." Glancing back over his shoulder, he shifts, angling his body between Touya and his subjects. "Go, quickly, and let my battle cover your retreat."
They bolt in the direction of the exit, and Touya is stunned to realize they’re alone down here now. The ride queue was empty, and so were the booths and stalls nearby. Where did everyone go?
Had they planned this?
"...Now then, Touya, do you follow my logic?"
Touya’s attention snaps back. There are two answers before him. Silence isn't an option. Forces one from his mouth. "Yes."
N tilts his head, expression conflicted. "Is that so? Well, if that's true, that makes me happy." His voice untethers, lifting elsewhere, not meant for Touya. Not really. "Ah. Then... the future I envision..."
He trails off, and comes back to himself, drawing in a deep breath. And then N takes up his battle stance. "Perhaps I can't beat you here and now, but I can at least buy some time for these two members of Team Plasma to get away!"
The air driving him has changed, crackling like flames. And a frightening anticipation shortens Touya's breath, frightening because he couldn’t tell if it came from within or without. So they will battle. Truthfully, Touya always wants to battle him. And it's an awful kind of thrill, getting to battle this new N, but a thrill nonetheless.
It begins. Friends come to N’s aid: a Sandile manifesting from the flower beds; Darumaka from a shadowed alley; Sigiliph descending from the starlit sky with its strangely hollow call. Blitzle and Petilil stand strong until it’s Dewott’s time to take over. N doesn't have to call out orders so he speaks between the blows. There's no malice in his voice when he tells Touya his Pokémon look happy.
And Touya might not be able to communicate with his Pokémon the way N can but he can respond here, the only way he knows how. By giving it his all. It's how battle always makes him feel, the only time words and directions make sense to him.
When the dust settles, it’s N’s last friend on the ground. Dewott cries her victory, scalchops lifted high, and Touya’s breathing hard, radioactive and lighter than air. N looks on, resolute and grim, his last words still shaped on parted lips.
"But you... who are you?"
Those words, spoken so softly, become a lump in Touya’s throat. He doesn’t know what’s supposed to happen next.
N ushers off his friends, wiping the sweat from his face and turning back to Touya once they’re safe.
"You're strong. But I have a future I must change. And, for that future…”
N leans forward, suddenly so close. And Touya could swear he hadn’t moved an inch, but how did they end up like this if Touya hadn’t, Touya’s head craned back and N staring straight into his eyes, the brims of their hats nearly touching.
The worst part is he’s smiling again. He’s smiling again, and Touya has never seen him angry like this before. "I'll defeat the Champion and become unbeatable, unlike any other–! I'll make all Trainers free their Pokemon! Just try and stop me!" N says, eyes wild and blue and relentless. "If you want to be together with Pokemon, your only hope is to collect the eight gym badges and head to the Pokemon league!"
And it strikes him now, why N was here in the first place. Why their paths crossed, again and again. He was attempting the same thing, collecting all the gym badges. A third companion, unbeknownst to them, shadowing their journey the entire time in secret.
No, not a companion. A rival, an-
An enemy.
Only, looking at him right now, all Touya can see is someone powerful, someone important. "Try and stop me there, if you dare." N commands. A hero.
The moment breaks as he turns to go. Touya thinks about calling out. About trying to explain the feelings twisting around inside him, the ones he didn't have names for. Try and stop me, he'd said. He wants to stop him now. He wants to understand why this is happening in the first place.
But then N pauses, back to him as his voice carries up and away, and Touya knows this time the words are meant for him. "If your conviction isn't strong enough, you will never be able to defeat me."
Touya says nothing, again. And N leaves. Head high and shoulders straight, never looking back.
Touya watches him go. He is a kaleidoscope, and he is a thief, taking the colors with him as he walks away. The hyperawareness of battle finally starts to loosen its grip, and as reality drips back in his absence, Touya realizes with a start that there are people around him again. People frantic, looking around, park workers and police trying to get the stories straight.
One zeroes in on him. Touya gets swept away too.
But as he’s led off by a policeman, Touya can't shake the feeling of distance between him and everyone else. Because even as he’s spoken to, touched on the arm and shoulder, handed his flustered Dewott, Touya doesn’t altogether feel it. Thinks some vital, comprehensive part of himself got left up there in the night air too.
They’ll ask him questions about his encounter, about the Daycare man and the grunts and Team Plasma’s mysterious king. And Touya’s no good put on the spot under normal circumstances but he’s particularly useless now because when it comes to N he doesn’t even know what to say.
King. Hero. Enemy. There are so many versions of N, and yet he can only think of one the rest of the night. The one he clings to in all nights that follow. The one that will haunt him for years to come.
The N that stood underneath the lights, looking to the sky.