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“Thank you all! I’ll never forget this feeling!”
Jeongguk rushes off the stage, all while fireworks explode in the night sky above his head and tens of thousands of his fans chant his name for more. He’d already done two encores, though, and his body was starting to feel it.
Still, there was a huge grin on his face as Jeongguk jogs down the last set of steps. The cheers of the crowd were more muffled beneath the stage. He almost wished he could turn up the speakers in his dressing room just to listen to his fans as they slowly made their way out of the arena. He settles for watching from the large video monitor. Confetti was still raining down after being shot from multiple canons during his penultimate song, and Jeongguk’s grin doesn’t falter as he watches fans catch pieces midair or collect some that had fallen onto seats; all to stuff the pieces safely into their bags or pockets.
First thing first: Jeongguk needed a shower.
He strips out of his sweaty encore shirt- a cheaply made t-shirt with his face plastered front and center. He’d wanted something more minimal, maybe with the tour dates or something related more to the album he was in the middle of touring. With only ten cities to go before finishing the tour, he still didn’t have a say in any of the merchandise.
“There’s my favorite guy.”
Jeongguk startles, halfway through pulling off his tight black jeans as Jaehyun walks into the room. He scowls, reaching for the robe hanging on the end of his costume rack. “What did I say about knocking?”
His manager ignores the quib, grinning widely. “Merch sales are up,” Jaehyung says. He walks to the middle of the room, shoves his hand into Jeongguk’s bowl of M&Ms and collects half of the chocolate morsels between his fingers. Then he sits heavily on Jeongguk’s couch. “Two encores, though? We should be at the airport already.”
“The fans wanted it.” Jeongguk shrugs, using the robe as a barrier as he finishes pulling off his pants. He knows as soon as they leave this place, staff will collect and wash all of his clothing so it’s ready for the next show. In forty-eight hours. “Plus, the wheel stopped between two different surprise songs. I couldn’t make them pick just one.”
“Yes, you could.” Jaehyun pops several candy pieces into his mouth, then speaks around them. “We’ll be late. Get changed.”
“But-”
Jeongguk doesn’t get the chance to plead his case. Jaehyun stands, throws the rest of the M&Ms in the direction of the trash can, and leaves without another word.
Sighing, Jeongguk ducks into the attached bathroom to shower quickly. He changes into a pair of loose jeans and a sweater, then carefully packs his personal toiletries into his bag, trying to remember if he’d brought any other personal items from the hotel when he left that afternoon.
The dressing room wasn’t empty when Jeongguk left the bathroom.
“Hyung!”
Yoongi looks up from his phone with a soft smile, pocketing the device as he stands. He tilts his chin in the direction of the spilled M&Ms. “Jaehyun?”
Jeongguk scowls. “Yeah.”
With a shrug, Yoongi makes quick work of the scattered chocolate, dropping the pieces into the trashcan while Jeongguk slips into his jacket and shoves his iPad into his backpack. “Here,” Yoongi says as they’re leaving the dressing room. He hands Jeongguk a bundle of fabric. “Saved you one at the start.”
At the very first show of the tour, Jeongguk’s team had come up with the idea of a city exclusive t-shirt; one that was different for each stop. Of course, the shirts were snagged almost immediately once the merch lines would open in the morning, and Jaehyun had spent the last three months making up excuses and throwing half-hearted apologies over his shoulder each time he ‘failed’ to grab one. Jeongguk lets the shirt unfold in front of him with a grin. As soon as he’d seen the designs on Twitter, he’d become obsessed with them. This one was a picture of the NYC grid and a little Jeongguk figurine halfway between the tiny theater where he’d first performed in the city and the arena he’d just sold out for the first time.
“Thank you, hyung.” Jeongguk stops in the middle of the hallway to quickly tug off his sweater, pull on the t-shirt, and button his sweater again. Yoongi waits patiently, checking his phone as he does so. “I owe you one.”
“You don’t owe me anything. The car is waiting.”
Jeongguk pauses at the door one last time, turning around to face the hallway of white doors and white walls. His artist pictures plastered backstage would soon be removed, and the local crew would have the set taken down before the sun came up in the morning. With a tug in his chest, Jeongguk tries to remind himself to hang onto this moment, before the experience becomes a memory and the memory begins to fade.
With an escort from local police, their car makes it away from the arena in less time than Jeongguk thought possible. He had a flight first thing in the morning, but Jeongguk still pulled up his phone to launch an Instagram live to chat with fans and express how he hoped to be back performing in New York again soon.
“I’ve got Suga with me,” Jeongguk says to the screen. He watches the chat for a full minute as the comments explode with excitement. “Ah, really. Sometimes I think you guys like my guitarist more than you like me.”
Still, he shifts his body on the seat so he can get Yoongi in the frame, laughing as the speed of comments and emojis increases again. Behind him, Yoongi glances up from his phone, his dark hair falling into his eyes as he greets Jeongguk’s fans with practiced civility. But he has a small smile on his face. Jeongguk feels his cheeks warm at the comments that all call it Yoongi’s ‘Jeongguk Smile.’
“Okay!” Jeongguk leans flat on the seat, his head on Yoongi’s thigh. “Thank you all again for your support on this tour. I couldn’t do it without you, and I’ll see you in Boston. Goodnight! Mwah!”
He clicks out of Instagram and lets his phone fall to the floor.
“Ugh.”
Yoongi quickly grabs the phone before it could disappear under a seat. “You good?”
“I’m fine,” Jeongguk assures him. He sighs when he feels Yoongi’s hand in his hair, a reassuring weight against his skull. “Just tired.”
“Mhm.” There was a long pause. “So a few of my friends are in town.”
“You have other friends?” Jeongguk jokes, though there was an unhappy feeling in his chest when he thought about his guitarist hanging out with people who weren’t him.
Yoongi tugs at his hair. “Very funny, Guk. I’m meeting them at a bar downtown. And I’m saying it now to ask if you want to come.”
Jeongguk sits up abruptly. “You want me to come?”
“I always want you to come.”
“You never ask me to come.”
“This is starting to sound too sexual when all I’m trying to do is invite you for a drink.” Yoongi rubs at his eyes, though he was still grinning. “I invite you every time, by the way. A certain Lee Jaehyun always promises to pass along the message.”
“Oh, he-” Jeongguk pauses, glancing at the empty passenger seat in the car. A seat that was usually always occupied by his manager. “You-”
“Gave Jaehyun the wrong car? Oops. Do you want to come for a drink or not?”
Jeongguk’s lips split in a wide smile. “Hell yeah.”
Yoongi passes the address along to their driver, flipping his phone around so Jeongguk could see all the frantic texts Jaehyun had been sending him. “It’s the same on your phone,” Yoongi says. “Which is why it’s with me.”
“He’s going to kill you.”
“I’d like to see him try.” Yoongi holds the car door open for Jeongguk, who hesitates for only a second before he feels both feet hit the pavement. Yoongi grabs the coat Jeongguk left on the backseat and shoves it against Jeongguk’s chest. “You’ll be on that plane in the morning. He can bring his grievances to me.”
Jeongguk follows Yoongi through a rather nondescript door. For such a vibrant part of the city, there were fewer LED Billboards and flashing signs than Jeongguk was used to seeing whenever he was here. A bouncer stood in front of an elevator, checking both of their IDs before stamping the back of their hands each with a little four leaf clover. Yoongi hits the button for the roof.
Upon stepping out of the elevator Jeongguk is immediately grateful Yoongi had forced him to keep his coat. Despite the warm spring afternoon, this late in the evening the rooftop was much colder. Upon first glance, Jeongguk could see more than a dozen heat lamps scattered between tables and even a firepit roaring in the middle of a collection of small sofas.
Upon second glance, Jeongguk recognized at least a dozen movie and tv stars.
They approach a woman standing next to a velvet rope. She greets them warmly, though Jeongguk could still see the empty look in her eyes from spending an entire day in a customer service job. She takes Yoongi’s ID and cross checks it with the list on the podium in front of her. Then she raises an eyebrow at Jeongguk.
“Your plus one?”
“Yes.”
“ID, please.”
Jeongguk fishes the ID out of his pocket again and watches the woman drop it into an envelope before she unclips the rope to allow them to enter the area. Yoongi links their hands together to guide him through the throng of people.
“Hyung-”
“It’s a security thing,” Yoongi interrupts him. He has to shout a little to be heard over the music. “I don’t know if you noticed, but there aren’t many regular people here. Come on.”
So Jeongguk hadn’t been seeing things.
Even if he wasn’t constantly recognizing faces from TV, movies, music, and more; everyone here was outrageously gorgeous. Jeongguk instinctively lowers his gaze, tucking his chin into the collar of his jacket. He wondered if Yoongi would mind if he just left.
“Yoongi!”
They come to a stop next to a table tucked in the corner. Three chairs were already occupied while two more sat empty. Jeongguk hadn’t been wrong earlier: these three men were somehow even more beautiful than the ones he and Yoongi had been walking past. He doesn’t want to make any assumptions, but he does let out a sigh of relief as the man with a boxy smile speaks in Korean to greet Yoongi.
“You must be Jeongguk.” The guy in the middle turns to him, faded brown hair with light tips windswept against his forehead. He smiles. Then his smile falters, and he repeats himself in English.
“No!” Jeongguk says hurriedly. He bites the inside of his cheek, telling himself to calm down. “I mean, yes. I’m Jeon Jeongguk.”
“Yoongi has told us so much about you,” the guy says. He holds out a hand. “My name is Namjoon. This is Taehyung,” he nudges the beautiful man next to him. “And this is our hyung, Seokjin.” Namjoon gestures to the stunning man across the table. “We were starting to think Yoongi was hallucinating you.”
“Ha ha. Very funny, asshole.” Yoongi rolls his eyes. “Sit, Jeongguk-ah. I’ll get your drink.”
Unsure what to do with himself besides following directions, Jeongguk sits in the empty chair next to Seokjin. It gave him a chance to glance over the glass wall behind him and- holy fuck they were a long way from the ground.
“Yoongi tells us you just finished a concert,” Taehyung says.
“Ah, yeah.”
“Where?”
“Madison Square Garden.”
Namjoon whistles. “That’s very impressive.”
“It…” Jeongguk slaps his palms against his overheating cheeks. He thinks of the screams. Of the light sticks. Of thousands of people singing along to his Korean lyrics. “It was a lot.”
“I can imagine,” Seokjin finishes his drink. He taps quickly at his phone. “We played there a few years ago. I couldn’t sleep for days afterwards.”
Jeongguk blinks, momentarily stunned just by Seokjin’s face. His hair was parted perfectly, not at all affected by the wind that seemed to get the better of both Namjoon and Taehyung- the latter of whom produced a hairband from his pocket to push his hair out of his eyes. The perfect symmetry of Seokjin’s face, challenged only by the slight unevenness of his plush lips, begged Jeongguk to spend all his free time learning each curve of his perfect skin.
Fuck.
He needed to get a hold of himself.
Jeongguk clears his throat, pressing his nails into his palms. He remembers too late that Yoongi still had his phone, so he couldn’t even fake an emergency phone call. Instead he asks, “You’ve played at UBS?”
Seokjin and Namjoon share a look.
Namjoon tilts his head. “Yoongi didn’t tell you?”
“Okay.” Speak of the devil. Yoongi returns with more drinks than one should be able to carry in two hands, but he somehow makes it work. He passes a fresh drink to Seokjin, Namjoon, and Taehyung before sliding Jeongguk’s drink to him. “Strawberry lemonade and rum. Enough sugar to have you bouncing off the walls.”
Jeongguk scowls. “Jaehyun won’t like that.”
“Jaehyung can suck my dick.”
Taehyung snorts. “He should be so lucky.”
“Hush.”
“And what are you drinking?” Seokjin rests his elbow on the table, propping his chin on his closed fist. “A Manhattan?”
Yoongi flips him off as he settles in the chair next to Namjoon. “It’s a lot of alcohol.”
“You’re boring, Yoongi-chi.”
“What I am is too sober to deal with your ass.”
Seokjin only laughs, bringing his drink to his lips. Jeongguk watches the way his throat bobs with each swallow. Seokjin catches him staring.
Jeongguk turns back to his drink, suddenly feeling too warm in the cool night air. He downs half his drink, then stops to catch his breath. Across the table, Namjoon gathers Yoongi into a tight hug, and Yoongi- never one for excessive physical contact- settles against Namjoon’s side like a puzzle piece sliding home.
The momentary stillness is immediately shattered as Taehyung reaches around Namjoon to flick Yoongi’s ear. “You didn’t tell Jeongguk about us!”
It wasn’t a question; it was an accusation. Taehyung pouts into his drink, winking when he catches Jeongguk’s eye. Yoongi shrugs.
“Jeongguk’s manager doesn’t like me talking about you.”
Taehyung rolls his eyes. “Because I didn’t sign with his company?”
“No.” Yoongi glares at him. “Because you set a small fire on the party boat.”
“That was an accident!” Taehyung sits up straight. He looks between Namjoon and Seokjin, an edge of desperation creeping into his voice. “You know that was an accident!”
“We know, Taehyung-ah.” Namjoon pats his hand gently. “Jaehyun would hate you either way. He hates anyone who doesn’t make him money.”
“And some who do,” Seokjin mutters into his glass.
Jeongguk looks around the table, trying to get a hand on the general vibe. By the use of honorifics, he figures Taehyung is the youngest of the trio. Namjoon had called Seokjin their hyung, meaning he was likely older than Yoongi. He tries to do the math as Taehyung bounces between talking about new music he’d been listening to and asking Yoongi how much longer he was going to be on tour.
“We’ve still got two months,” Yoongi says as he gestures to Jeongguk.
“Aw.” Taehyung slumps in his chair, his drink almost entirely untouched. He notices Jeongguk staring, and slides the fruity cocktail across the table. “But we need you in the studio.”
“Yeah, well. I didn’t plan this tour.”
“Speaking of tour,” Namjoon interjects. “Jeongguk-ah, we played UBS a few years ago as part of our second tour.”
“Your second tour?”
“We’re a K-pop group,” Seokjin says.
Jeongguk chokes on his drink, swallowing an ice cube. “You are?”
“Ouch,” Namjoon laughs. “Not technically K-pop, I guess. Korean music, some of it is pop, but you know how the media loves to label us.”
Jeongguk scowls, thinking of the reviews of his latest album. “Yeah.”
Seokjin reaches slowly, hesitating only a second before he tucks Jeongguk’s hair behind his ear. Jeongguk’s brain flatlines, his tongue heavy in his mouth. “We don’t tour very often, but our last song did remarkably well on quite a few charts.”
“When-” Jeongguk clears his throat. God, he was embarrassing. “When was that?”
“Oh, gosh.” Seokjin waves his hand, then drops it on Jeongguk’s knee beneath the table. Jeongguk quickly finishes the rest of Taehyung’s drink, hoping Seokjin couldn’t feel his pounding heartbeat through his fucking kneecap. “Two years ago?”
“Holy shit.”
“Yoongi really hasn’t told you about us?” Seokjin raises an eyebrow, squeezing Jeongguk’s knee as he does so.
“Lay off him,” Yoongi interjects. “I barely see him and I’m in his fucking band.”
Taehyung frowns. “Hyung-”
“Not now, Tae.” Yoongi flags down one of the servers weaving through the crowds of people.
Despite the open rooftop, their little corner table somehow felt completely isolated. Whether it was because of the location, or because of staff and patron discretion, Jeongguk wasn’t sure. All he knew was even though there were plenty of people around, no one paid him any mind. It was a nice change from constantly hiding his face behind masks and beneath hats just to walk down the street.
Seokjin didn’t seem to mind, either, if his hand inching higher on Jeongguk’s thigh was anything to go by.
The server Yoongi flagged returns a minute later with another round of drinks- and a soda for Taehyung. He sets a few appetizers on the table, and Jeongguk alternates between fucking up some buffalo wings and sucking down his third drink while Yoongi and his friends discuss when they might all be in Seoul together again.
“Jeongguk,” Namjoon says. Jeongguk looks up from where he’d been licking ranch dressing off his fingers, much to Seokjin’s amusement. “Your last album was entirely English, right?”
Jeongguk groans, just tipsy enough not to care how loud he was being. “Yeah. That was management’s idea. They thought it would give me a broader appeal globally, whatever the fuck that means.”
Yoongi smiles into his drink.
“I liked some of the songs,” Namjoon says.
“Sure.”
“No, really.” Namjoon reaches across to squeeze Jeongguk’s wrist at the same time Seokjin squeezes his thigh. Jeongguk squeaks. “Your voice is incredible, Jeongguk-ah.”
“Oh, I…” Jeongguk falters, a little overwhelmed, held so securely in Namjoon’s strong gaze while Seokjin was currently trying to shove his fingers between Jeongguk’s thighs. A certain part of Jeongguk’s body was interested. “Thank you, Namjoon-ssi. That means a lot.”
“Oh, please. Call me hyung.”
Jeongguk bites his lip as he fails to hide his smile. “Okay, hyung.”
Taehyung snatches a wing out of Jeongguk’s hand. “I like that one song about the shot glass of tears.” He talks louder over Jeongguk’s objections. “I love visualizing the optics.”
“How does one cry enough to fill an entire shot glass?” Seokjin asks, gently trailing his finger from Jeongguk’s knee to his upper thigh, slow enough to white out Jeongguk’s brain as he finishes his drink. “Can you even do it in one crying session?”
“Ask Namjoon in high school,” Yoongi snickers.
“Do not bring up high school, hyung, we’re in our thirties.”
“Damn,” Jeongguk says. He sits straight up. “Wait, wait. Yoomfi- phone. Please.”
Yoongi slides his phone across the table, typing in Jeongguk’s password when his alcohol muddled brain struggles to remember the four digits. He ignores all the blurry texts from Jaehyun to hurriedly find a picture saved to one of his photo albums. Then, with the most serious expression he could muster, he shows the picture of dinosaurs to the table and asks, “Did you go to school with them?”
“Brat,” Seokjin says, followed by a curse, as Taehyung erupts in giggles. Even Namjoon and Yoongi were grinning, though the latter rolled his eyes as he once again pocketed Jeongguk’s phone just as the screen lit up with a call from Jaehyun. “Yoongi, I cannot believe you brought this brat to torment us like this.”
“Don’t act like you don’t love it.”
Boldly, Seokjin taps a finger against the button of Jeongguk’s jeans. “I can neither confirm nor deny.”
Jeongguk swallows thickly.
“Speaking of shots,” Taehyung says, trying to catch the eye of one of the servers.
Namjoon groans. “Will you actually drink it this time?”
“Yes,” Taehyung whines. He pouts at Namjoon with what has to be the most devastating puppy dog eyes Jeongguk has ever seen in his entire life. Seokjin shifts closer, his warm weight pressed to Jeongguk’s side. “We’ll get something good. It’s not my fault you guys drink straight whiskey shots like old men.”
Yoongi throws a crumpled napkin in Taehyung’s direction. “Watch it.”
“Did the dinosaurs like whiskey?” Jeongguk asks.
Taehyung snickers, holding up his hand for a high-five. “I like him.”
Yoongi sighs. “I feared you would.”
Another server returns with a tray of shots, depositing them on the table and expertly clearing empty plates and glasses. Jeongguk felt flushed from alcohol and good company. He couldn’t help but wonder just how many times Yoongi had left one of Jeongguk’s performances to meet up with friends while Jeongguk was shipped right back to an empty hotel room or his apartment.
Taehyung hands each of them a shot glass. He holds his up. “To new friends.”
Seokjin finally removes his hand as they all knock back their drinks, and Jeongguk is acutely aware of the cold spot on his thigh now without the heat of Seokjin’s palm. He wants it back. He also doesn’t know how to say that without sounding slightly insane. He’d just met Seokjin two hours ago. A little thigh grabbing between new friends didn’t mean anything, right?
They all knock back their drinks- except for Taehyung, who takes one tiny sip of the liquor and makes a face before sliding the glass across the table to Jeongguk. He shrugs, and quickly swallows the drink as Yoongi hurriedly tries to take the glass from him.
“Fuck, Taehyung.” Yoongi subtly removes Jeongguk’s forgotten nearly half-full drink from the table. “He’s got a photoshoot in the morning.”
“And you brought him here?” Seokjin asks.
“Yes, I-” Yoongi falters, pursing his lips. He lets out a breath, then gently pats Jeongguk’s hand. “Jeongguk-ah. We should get going.”
“M’kay. I need the bathroom first.”
“Take the elevator to floor 19. I’ll pay the check and meet you down there.”
“‘Kay, hyung.”
Jeongguk stands and stumbles a little, giggling to himself as he walks the unfamiliar route back to the elevator. As he passes, the woman guarding the rooftop bar from those unchosen holds a card between two fingers. Jeongguk pauses and stares until he recognizes his own face on the ID, and thanks her as he takes it.
The elevator ride is short, only five floors, before the door opens again to a long hallway with one set of bathrooms to the left and another to the right. Jeongguk heads right, quickly doing his business. He was washing his hands when the door opened.
Looking up in the mirror, Jeongguk sees Seokjin behind him.
“Fuck,” he breathes.
Seokjin hears him, a grin fighting its way onto his lips. He moves closer in the mirror until Jeongguk feels him pressed entirely against Jeongguk’s back; his arms snaking around Jeongguk’s middle as the water shuts off from disuse.
“Hey.”
Jeongguk swallows, his voice hoarse as he answers. “Hi.”
“Was it too much up there?”
Yes, Jeongguk wants to say. Not because he didn’t like it, but because he hadn’t been expecting it tonight and his brain hadn’t quite caught up to the fact that someone as beautiful as Seokjin might want to touch him.
“No.”
Seokjin gently urges Jeongguk to turn around, their bodies flush together and Jeongguk’s back digging into the sink. He can’t breathe, surrounded entirely by the warm scent of Seokjin’s cologne and the exposed expanse of his neck.
He feels Seokjin’s fingers on his chin, tapping twice to regain Jeongguk’s attention. “How much did you drink tonight?”
“Not that much. Barely anything. So little, actually. Did I even drink tonight?” Jeongguk cringes at himself, aware of his rambling but unable to keep his tongue in check. God, he wanted Seokjin’s tongue in his-
“You nearly fell into the elevator.”
Jeongguk lets out a sigh that devolves into a groan. He could feel Seokjin, the two of them so close Jeongguk was acutely aware of every part of Seokjin’s body. “I’ll sober up. We’ll get coffee. So much fucking coffee.”
Seokjin laughs, leaning close to touch his nose to the underside of Jeongguk’s jaw. “No, Jeongguk-ah.”
“But-”
“You want to?”
“Yes.”
“Mhm. Just checking.” Seokjin pulls back, slipping his hands into the back pockets of Jeongguk’s jeans. “We can.”
Jeongguk perks up. “My hotel is-”
“Not tonight.”
Jeongguk whines. “But hyung-”
“We’ve both been drinking.” One of Seokjin’s hands leaves his pocket, moving in Jeongguk’s peripheral vision. He twirls a lock of Jeongguk’s hair between his fingers. “You’re cute, I’ll give you that.”
“Not cute enough to let me suck you off,” Jeongguk mutters.
Seokjin’s eyes flash with something heavy. “Oh trust me, Jeongguk. You’re definitely cute enough for that. Where’s your next show?”
“Boston.”
“When?”
“Tuesday.”
Seokjin sighs. “We’ll still be here.”
“There’s a train-”
“I don’t hate myself enough to struggle through Boston public transportation.”
Jeongguk deflates, curling his fingers sadly in the waistband of Seokjin’s jeans. “I can’t believe you hate me and never want to see me again.”
Seokjin snorts, an ugly sound that balances out his beauty enough for Jeongguk to crack his own smile in return. “That is not what I said at all.”
“Promise?” He holds out his pinky.
Seokjin stares for a moment, a soft smile on his lips. Slowly, agonizingly, he raises his own hand to link their pinkies together. “Promise.”
“Okay.” Jeongguk tugs on Seokjin’s pants. “Are you sure we can’t-?”
“I’m sure.”
Jeongguk blows a heavy breath between his lips. “Fine! Okay! Then stop squeezing my ass before I get a boner.”
Seokjin steps back to put a few feet of space between them, his hands held up as if in surrender. “Better get going. Yoongi is waiting for you in the hallway.”
“Okay.”
He walks to the door, pauses, and looks back.
Seokjin laughs again. “Go, Jeongguk-ah.”
Sticking out his tongue, Jeongguk tugs open the door to the hallway. True to Seokjin’s words, Yoongi was leaning against the opposite wall, typing rapidly on his phone. When he hears Jeongguk approach, he pockets the phone and looks up.
“Ready?”
“Yeah.” Jeongguk’s shoulders slump, the high and subsequent crash of a concert day finally hitting him all at once. Yoongi offers a hand which Jeongguk gratefully takes as they enter the elevator.
In the car, Yoongi nudges Jeongguk where he’s dozing on Yoongi’s shoulder. “I got Jiyoon to move your suitcases into my room. Apparently Jaehyun was trying to wait for you there.”
“Ew.”
“Yeah.” Yoongi gently guides Jeongguk into a more comfortable position. “You can say that again.”
Swaddled in his pajamas and taking up way too much of Yoongi’s bed, Jeongguk’s phone buzzes just before he falls asleep.
From: Kim Seokjin Hyung [3:18am]
Goodnight, Jeongguk-ah
Jeongguk grins, types out ‘gdnfht hyu’, hits send, and loses himself to sleep.
“He looks terrible.”
“Would you relax? He looks fine.”
“He looks terrible,” Jaehyun repeats himself. “The fuck did you do? Hit him with a baseball bat all night?”
“I’m not you, so no.”
Jaehyun sneers. “I don’t like your tone, Yoongi.”
“Oh, dear. I’m so sorry to hear that.”
“Guys.” Jeongguk groans, holding his face in his hands for dear life. “Please shut up.”
His stylist, a kind woman named Nayoung who’d first become his dedicated makeup artist after his first hit song five years ago, waited patiently at his side for Jeongguk’s latest bout of nausea to subside.
When he’d woken early that morning to catch his flight, Jeongguk hadn’t had time to become hungover yet. Since landing in Boston, sitting in a car, and now waiting to begin a last minute photoshoot, that hangover had come creeping in with a vengeance. And he couldn’t disappear to eat greasy food and some terrible green juice his older brother claimed saved his drunk ass a dozen times in college because they were late to start taking pictures and Jeongguk was on a strict diet while touring.
He groans again, gesturing for one of the bottles of water on the makeup vanity.
Yoongi unscrews the cap and hands it over.
He wasn’t even needed for this shoot- after all, Yoongi was a guitarist only meant to be part of Jeongguk’s live band for the tour- but Jeongguk always liked having Yoongi around. He was a comforting presence. And he hated Jaehyun, which was always a bonus.
“Okay.” Jeongguk says, after finishing half the water. “Okay, I’m ready.”
Nayoung steps close with powders and concealer and eyeliner. Jeongguk didn’t know the concept of this shoot, just that Jaehyun had approved it a few days ago when he realized Jeongguk had an open three hours in his schedule.
Jaehyun excuses himself to talk to the photographer. Yoongi takes a seat somewhere to his left, and Jeongguk lets himself relax under Nayoung’s practiced hand. He thinks of the text he woke up to from Seokjin, a few laughing emojis at the gibberish Jeongguk had sent him before falling asleep. Jeongguk suspected Yoongi had something to do with the three new contacts in his phone.
They do the pictures first. Starting with Jeongguk sitting posed on a set of cardboard boxes, then of him standing with an electric guitar. It isn’t long before they get him sitting against a pole someone says they’ll CGI to be a car or something. Jeongguk doesn’t care, but he draws the line when he’s lying on his side and the photographer tries to get him to put his hand on his own dick.
The interview comes next. Jeongguk doesn’t know which magazine the interviewer was from, but the guy clearly hadn’t listened to his latest album. The questions are all superficial, and when Jeongguk tries to steer the conversation to talk more about why he’d made the choices he did as a Korean singer, the interviewer quickly loses interest and instead wants to talk about Jeongguk’s predominantly female fanbase.
Yoongi hands him a hot tea once they’re finished. “Dinner?” He asks.
Jeongguk shakes his head. He doesn’t even bother taking off his makeup, just follows Jaehyun to the waiting car and the empty hotel room waiting for him on the other end of the drive.
From: Kim Seokjin Hyung [9:22pm]
When are you free next?
Jeongguk glances at his phone, looking away from his Pokopia screen. He can’t help but smile as he reads the text from Seokjin. The TV was playing a home renovation show. Jeongguk couldn’t understand most of the English, but he didn’t need to in order to know the couple was making a terrible choice of paint color.
To: Kim Seokjin Hyung [9:27pm]
Friday
All day
To: Kim Seokjin Hyung [9:29pm]
Next concert after Boston is Sunday
So
Saturday travel day
I’ll have
~ Free Time ~
From: Kim Seokjin Hyung [9:31pm]
Okay.
To: Kim Seokjin Hyung [9:31pm]
Okay????????
FULL okay????
not even little ok
From: Kim Seokjin Hyung [9:35pm]
I’ll let you know when we’re in the city
To: Kim Seokjin Hyung [9:35pm]
okok
Tell taehyungie hyung i say hi
From: Kim Seokjin Hyung [9:35pm]
Text him yourself?????
To: Kim Seokjin Hyung [9:36pm]
☹️
From: Kim Seokjin Hyung [9:38pm]
Fine.
He says hi back
To: Kim Seokjin hyung [9:39pm]
:D
He’s grinning stupidly at his phone when there’s a knock at his door. Jeongguk tosses his phone onto the sheets, saves his Pokopia game, and shuffles to the door to collect the room service he’d ordered. Now he was regretting not taking Yoongi up on his offer to get dinner, but they’d have more chances for that later.
In the morning, he’d have to soundcheck for the shows. He thinks of Seokjin meeting him after the third show on Friday- if his trio can finish with whatever they were doing in NYC- and grins so wide he can barely chew his food.
He was being ridiculous, he knew it. But it was so hard to meet people on tour, and even harder to meet idols in the same industry as him who were willing to even try. All the times Jeongguk attempted to flirt with people he met or worked with, he was either left on read or dropped completely when the guy decided it was too much trouble to actually think through his sexuality. Not to mention the way Jaehyun constantly dissuaded him from actively pursuing anything with anyone.
You’re in the middle of song promotions, Jaehyun would say.
Your album just came out, was another favorite of Jaehyun’s.
No way you think she wants you.
No matter. Jeongguk had become very friendly with his right hand over the course of the three tours he’d been on so far in his career. If Seokjin could help with that, great. If not, Jeongguk had learned how to pack for these long nights.
After a quick shower, Jeongguk wraps himself in his blankets and settles on an American movie he knew enough of the plot to watch. The tea he’d ordered just before his shower cools on the nightstand.
His phone buzzes.
From: taetae [11:02pm]
r u gonna boink my hyung
Jeongguk lets out a laugh so loud he slaps his palm over his mouth. Grinning, he types back.
To: taetae [11:04pm]
hopefully
From: taetae [11:05pm]
oh thank fuck
I want pictures
To: taetae [11:05pm]
No
From: taetae [11:06pm]
😯
To: taetae [11:06pm]
👨❤️💋👨
Instead of a reply from Taehyung, his phone buzzes with a reminder from Jaehyun of when he has to leave the hotel in the morning. Jeongguk scowls, tosses his phone to disappear somewhere in his blankets, and turns his attention back to the movie.
Jeongguk collapses onto the couch, acutely aware of the sweat cooling damp all over his body, but too tired to think about moving. Through the speakers hooked up in the dressing room, he could still hear his fans cheering his name and cheering for another encore, but after the previous night’s three extra songs, Jaehyun had put his foot down. Jeongguk was to stick to the encore setlist, and that was final.
He closes his eyes, reaching blindly for a hand towel he knew someone smarter than him had left nearby. He uses it to wipe his face and the back of his neck, itching for a shower but wanting to soak in this moment a little longer.
Cities with three consecutive shows were always the hardest. They couldn’t book the arena for a fourth date, so Jaehyun decided it wasn’t worth the effort to plan for a day between shows. Which meant Jeongguk had been riding the concert high since the first soundcheck on Tuesday afternoon; trying to check his mic, interact with the lucky fans who’d scored a soundcheck ticket, and ignore the phones he could see a few people sneaking around. But that didn’t bother him… much. It was mostly the company that wanted to keep soundchecks ridiculously exclusive. Jeongguk, on the other hand, wanted pictures and videos of everything. He knew it was impossible to remember every minute of every schedule he ever does, but he was going to try.
Eventually, his wet shirt became too sticky with cold sweat to ignore any longer. He strips quickly, tossing his dirty clothes in the basket in the corner to take a long shower. He’s stalling, he knows it, but his body aches from back to back to back nights of singing, dancing, and jumping.
Thankfully his dressing room was still empty when he finished his shower, poking through the clothes he’d brought with him for a pair of jeans and a hoodie. Jeongguk eyes the half-eaten bowl of M&Ms, shrugs, and takes the entire thing with him.
Staff of his and of the venue bid him goodbye as Jeongguk makes his way through the halls. Above him, he could hear the last of the fans making their way out of the arena, their voices growing louder the closer he got to the door. Jeongguk pauses, a frown itching his lips, and realizes too late-
There were fans waiting for him on the other side of the door.
His eyes grow wide at the sudden flash of cameras- how the fuck do they sneak those professional cameras into these things?- and the meteoric rise in volume of screams. Thankfully, someone had made sure to set up a barricade, but his fans waited on either side of him in a perfect line leading from the artist entrance of the venue to the door of his car.
Jeongguk quickly schools his expression, hoping he didn’t look too thrown off at the turn of events. He shoves the bowl of chocolates into his duffel bag, handing it off to one of the hired bodyguards before he turns to his waiting fans with a smile. He touches hands, completes hearts, poses for pictures, and accepts the Sharpie marker someone shoves into his hand to start signing things. Hats, albums, t-shirts. Someone thrusts a print out of a picture Jeongguk sent to his brother in their private chat and he grits his teeth, turning away without acknowledging it.
He tries his best to greet as many fans on both sides of the barricades before jumping into the waiting car with a sigh of relief. His bodyguard settles next to him. Jaehyun was already sitting in the front seat.
Jeongguk waits until the car merges onto the highway.
“What the fuck was that?”
“Hm?” Jaehyun doesn’t look up from his phone.
“You ambushed me!”
“Don’t be so dramatic.” Jaehyun fiddles with the radio. Jeongguk hears a second of his own voice that Jaehyun skips over. “We’ve been talking about doing these send-offs.”
“Yeah, on the next tour.” Jeongguk struggles to get the M&Ms out of his duffel bag, drops them, and sighs as he picks up pieces of chocolate and pops them into his mouth. “You can’t do that to me.”
Jaehyun waves away his concern. “It was mostly influencers, anyway. They promised to stream your album, and we all know how you need those streams.”
Jeongguk grits his teeth.
“Anyway, traffic is light-”
“I’m hungry.”
“Order room service.”
“Hyung.” Jeongguk resorts to the honorific, slumping in his seat. “I’m hungry.”
Jaehyun scowls. “Fine. There’s a Korean place nearby. But Donghoon is staying with you.”
Jeongguk glances at the man sitting next to him. Donghoon just shrugs, apologetic.
The driver takes the next exit and weaves through a busy street before coming to a stop in front of a brightly lit restaurant with Korean on the sign. Jeongguk had gone live the past two nights, so he doesn’t feel as guilty about prioritizing himself. Plus, he’d been on the road almost two months at this point. He needed Korean food before he withered away to nothing.
Unfortunately, he didn’t seem to be the only one with that idea.
Heads turn as he steps into the restaurant, eyes going wide as patrons around the room recognize him. Jeongguk curses silently. A Korean restaurant close by where he’d just performed? Half the audience was probably seated around these tables. He’d left his hat, mask, sunglasses, anything in the car Jaehyun was currently taking back to the hotel. Donghoon does his best to block Jeongguk from view, but even his large size couldn’t hide Jeongguk entirely.
He’s about ready to give up and resign himself to another plate of chicken from the hotel kitchens, when he hears someone calling his name.
“Guk-” A pause. “Jeongguk!” He finally spots Yoongi weaving through the tables and grabs his hyung’s hand the second he was close enough. “Finally. Thanks, Donghoon.”
“Anytime. I’ll be out here.”
“Come on,” Yoongi says to Jeongguk. “There’s a private room back here.”
Some people eye their clasped hands with interest, while others have the decency to look back to their meals. Yoongi wasn’t completely unknown. Anyone who had been following Jeongguk for the past few years knew Yoongi was a part of his band- and anyone who’d been following Korean music for longer knew of his production credits. Rumors would probably hit the trending tags by morning, but Jeongguk couldn’t bring himself to care.
The back room was almost entirely empty except for one table full of familiar faces, and- most importantly- filled with food.
“Jeongguk-ah!” Taehyung stands, tripping over his chair in his haste to pull Jeongguk into a tight hug. Jeongguk melts into it before settling in the empty chair between Yoongi and Taehyung. “Yoongi wasn’t sure you would make it.”
“I didn’t know you guys were in the city,” Jeongguk says. He doesn’t want to talk about the surprise send-off or Jaehyun. He grabs a waiting pair of chopsticks and immediately reaches for the side dishes scattered on the table.
Namjoon flips the meat cooking on the grill while Seokjin watches closely. “Well, when Yoongi offered us tickets to your show, we couldn’t refuse.”
Jeongguk pauses, kimchi held to his lips. “You guys were there?”
“We were,” Seokjin says with a smile. “You’re so good, Jeongguk-ah.”
Jeongguk very nearly chokes on his kimchi. “Ah, please-”
“No, really.” Taehyung piles Jeongguk’s plate high with side dishes while Seokjin cuts the meat. “Your breath control is insane.”
“Thank you, hyung.” Jeongguk mutters, refusing to meet Seokjin’s gaze across the table.
He can’t help but grin as Seokjin and Yoongi start divvying up the meat, thinking about Taehyung, Namjoon, and Seokjin being there in the audience while Jeongguk ran and danced across the stage, trying to interact with as many of his fans as possible.
“Aw.” Taehyung pinches his cheek. “He’s blushing.”
“I am not.”
“It’s cute.”
“I will leave.”
“Sure.” Taehyung ruffles his hair, still damp from his shower. “Pass the cabbage.”
Despite his weak objections, Jeongguk makes no move to leave as he shovels galbi into his mouth, accepting any of the meats or sides that anyone puts on his plate. Yoongi talks about Jeongguk’s schedule for the rest of the month while Namjoon and Seokjin mention how they’re getting ready to book a studio in Seoul. Taehyung would be doing some appearances on variety shows until then.
“You’re in L.A. next?” Seokjin asks him.
Jeongguk shoves a piece of lettuce piled with meat, kimchi, and beansprouts into his mouth and washes it down with half of his glass of Coke. “Chicago, actually. And then Dallas.”
“Damn.”
Jeongguk shrugs. “Jaehyun wanted to hit as many cities as we could.”
“I can see that.”
Jeongguk tries to pay the check and gets four hands that each slap his card away as they finish up. Donghoon looks the other way as Yoongi leads them out the private exit and to an oversized Uber waiting across the street. They don’t go anywhere special. Like the rest of the band and crew, Yoongi was staying in the same hotel as Jeongguk. They just weren’t telling Jaehyun they were on the way to the hotel.
Sitting in the backseat next to the window, Jeongguk takes half the car ride to work up the courage to one single thing: hook his pinky finger with Seokjin’s.
Seokjin doesn’t acknowledge it, caught in conversation with Namjoon, but his lips twitch with a smile as he squeezes their pinkies together. In the middle seats, Taehyung was working hard to fix the algorithm of Yoongi’s TikTok- an app he rarely used- to mostly cat videos.
They take the back entrance to the hotel. Yoongi stops in the lobby for a coffee, muttering something about a beat he wanted to work on before he slept. Namjoon and Taehyung step off the elevator on the fourth floor. The doors close, Seokjin and Jeongguk facing each other on opposite sides of the box.
“Your room…” Jeongguk starts.
“I’m sharing one with Namjoon and Taehyung.”
“Oh.” Jeongguk bites his lip, feeling an excitement growing hot in the pit of his stomach. He quickly presses the button for the seventh floor, wiggling his eyebrows as he does.
His room was an absolute mess. His mom always tried to suggest that Jeongguk unpack whenever he was in a hotel, but when Jeongguk was only staying in a city for a few days he found it hard to constantly unpack and re-pack his suitcase. So he lived out of a carry-on and his personal large suitcase for a few days. Now, his clothes were strewn over the floor and his bedsheets were a tangled mess at the end of the bed.
“Sorry about the-”
He doesn’t get the chance to finish his sentence. Seokjin grabs him by the waist, pulling their bodies flush together. Jeongguk steadies himself with both hands on Seokjin’s chest, throat drying at the solid muscle beneath his palms.
Seokjin’s hands cup his face, fingers gentle where they touch him. “Can I-?”
Jeongguk can’t wait for him to ask. He closes the space between them to do what he’s been wanting to since they first met on that rooftop bar.
He kisses Seokjin like he’d been starved for it, and maybe in a way he had been. Their lips move with a desperation that rivaled anything Jeongguk previously envisioned; Seokjin pries Jeongguk’s lips apart to push his tongue in, the kiss devolving rapidly.
Emboldened, Jeongguk lets his hands wander. He drags them first to Seokjin’s neck, tilting their heads to better deepen the kiss, then takes the first opportunity to shove his hands under Seokjin’s shirt. He seeks every inch of hidden skin, hands open and wanting.
Seokjin breaks the kiss only to tug Jeongguk’s hoodie over his head, kissing Jeongguk again briefly before he drags his lips across Jeongguk’s jaw, then his neck, and down his flushed chest until Seokjin was on his knees and his mouth was working hard to leave a mark on Jeongguk’s hip.
Exhaling shakily, Jeongguk wraps his hands in Seokjin’s hair; more to steady himself than Seokjin, who’d quickly gotten Jeongguk’s pants unbuttoned and his mouth on the growing bulge behind his jeans.
“Wait,” Jeongguk says suddenly. He tugs on Seokjin’s hair, then hisses at the wet press of Seokjin’s mouth on his underwear. “Wait, hyung.”
Seokjin looks up at him, eyes wide and cheeks flushed. Fuck. Jeongguk had never seen someone more beautiful in his entire life. He’s tempted to let Seokjin do anything he wants, but that could be unpacked later.
“You promised,” Jeongguk says.
“What?”
“At the bar. You pinky swore.”
Realization lights Seokjin’s gaze. “Right. You want to do it first.”
Desperation lines the edge of Jeongguk’s voice when he says, “Please.”
“Okay, baby.” Seokjin shifts, kissing Jeongguk as he stands to full height again. Jeongguk loses himself in it again, the plush feel of Seokjin’s big lips against his own. Then Seokjin breaks the kiss, fingers on Jeongguk’s chin, and he grins. “Better get to it, then.”
It should be embarrassing how quickly Jeongguk drops to his knees, but he finds that he doesn’t give a fuck. Seokjin pulls off his shirt, then waits expectantly as Jeongguk’s shaky fingers fumble with the zipper on his pants. It’s almost a relief when Jeongguk finally gets them undone. He makes quick work; shoving the pants and underwear down far enough just to get his mouth on Seokjin’s cock, pressing his lips to the underside and breathing deeply.
“Fuck,” Jeongguk sighs.
Seokjin cards his fingers gently through Jeongguk’s hair, guiding him to the tip and letting out a curse when Jeongguk finally takes him into his mouth. Jeongguk immediately starts to bob his head, desperate to take as much of Seokjin as he could. He was big; a warm, solid weight on Jeongguk’s tongue. His throat dries and his stomach tenses, his own cock aching in his underwear. But Jeongguk ignores it, focusing on taking Seokjin deeper in his mouth.
“Oh, shit, Jeongguk-ah.”
Jeongguk glares through wet eyelashes.
Seokjin laughs, a shaky sound as Jeongguk pulls back to trace his tongue over the tip. “Sorry. The pet name felt pushy.”
Jeongguk shakes his head, his hand on Seokjin’s dick to feel it between his fingers. “I like it. A lot.”
“Good to know.”
Shyly, Jeongguk pushes his head against Seokjin’s hand in his hair. “You can pull my hair, hyung. I, uh, I like that, too.”
Seokjin bends at the waist to kiss the top of his head, then uses the grip on his hair to shove Jeongguk’s face back against his crotch. “Also good to know. Now, if you don’t mind…”
Oh, Jeongguk certainly did not mind. He eagerly takes Seokjin’s dick into his mouth again, lips wet with spit and nose full of a warm scent Jeongguk couldn’t name. He didn’t care. Seokjin could smell like the worst perfume Jeongguk had ever smelt and Jeongguk would still offer to shove his face in Seokjin’s pants.
Like a man starved, Jeongguk alternates between taking Seokjin deep in his throat and suckling at the tip, letting Seokjin’s hand in his hair guide his pace. When Seokjin shoves him down further, Jeongguk takes it, squeezing his eyes shut against the tears threatening to build at the corners of his eyes. Seokjin watches above him, enraptured, and Jeongguk has to press the heel of his free hand against his own cock, desperate for any kind of relief.
He keeps going, lost in the taste of Seokjin’s precum on his tongue; Jeongguk thinks he’d be fine like this, on his knees for Seokjin for the rest of the night. Until Seokjin tugs a bit too harshly to pull Jeongguk off the tip, his own hand over Jeongguk’s at the base as he exhales through his nose.
“Hyung,” Jeongguk whines. He tries to pull against Seokjin’s hold, wanting his mouth full again.
Seokjin guides him back to his feet, his cheeks red and hair plastered to his forehead. “I’ll come if you keep going.”
Jeongguk grins. “Really?”
“Don’t look too proud, baby. It’s been a while.”
“Me, too.” Jeongguk admits.
Seokjin tilts his head. “Really?”
Jeongguk shrugs, then leans in to kiss Seokjin again. “Touring is hard. Do you still want to…?”
“Oh, absolutely. No question about that. Do you have condoms?”
“In the suitcase by the window.”
Jeongguk quickly kicks out of his pants and underwear, launching himself onto the bed with an eager wiggle while he watches Seokjin dig through the open suitcase for the variety box Jeongguk kept in there. He throws a look over his shoulder. Jeongguk lifts a shoulder. “What? I never know if it’ll be a person or a toy. Gotta keep my options open.”
“Sure.” Seokjin returns to the bed with a condom between his fingers and a bottle of lube in his other hand. “Do you want to-?”
“No.” Jeongguk lets his legs fall open. “I want you.”
Surprise flickers briefly across Seokjin’s face before he catches it. But he didn't say anything, and for that Jeongguk was glad. He wasn’t sure he could handle it if that would change anything about their evening. It had happened plenty of times before, with others who made too many assumptions before taking someone home, but Seokjin didn’t seem like the type. He joins Jeongguk on the bed, settling between Jeongguk’s spread legs on the mattress.
Seokjin pauses, leaning in to kiss Jeongguk gently, but now with a sexy man between his thighs Jeongguk wasn’t very interested in soft kisses.
“Hyung,” Jeongguk says into the kiss. He squeezes Seokjin’s shoulder. “Get on with it.”
Seokjin laughs against his lips. “Impatient, are we?”
“Duh.” Jeongguk settles against the pillow, closing his eyes as Seokjin litters kisses across his chest and neck. He’s careful not to spend too long where Jeongguk would struggle to hide any marks, briefly dragging his tongue up Jeongguk’s hard cock to make him moan. “I told you,” Jeongguk pants. “It’s been a while.”
Seokjin only hums, both hands on Jeongguk’s body as he spreads Jeongguk’s legs further, then he presses a wet finger to Jeongguk’s hole, slipping in gently in time with Jeongguk’s breathless exhale. He keeps his lips on Jeongguk’s length, whether to distract him or, if like Jeongguk, he’s a little desperate to taste every inch of skin available to him, Jeongguk couldn’t be sure. He also didn’t care. His hands fall to Seokjin’s hair, fingers curling in the soft locks as Seokjin slowly works a second finger into him, scissoring and spreading his fingers. Jeongguk’s knees shake on either side of Seokjin’s body, his stomach tensing as Seokjin brushes fingers against Jeongguk’s prostate.
“Oh, fuck.”
Jeongguk brings a hand to his mouth, head tilted to the ceiling. Seokjin pauses for only a second before he returns to the spot, working both fingers against the bundle of nerves. It makes Jeongguk moan, growing louder the harder Seokjin fingers him. He feels a grin against his hip, and he can’t help but laugh, too.
“Sorry, fuck.” Jeongguk tugs on Seokjin’s hair until their gazes meet. “It just…”
“It’s been a while,” Seokjin finishes.
But Jeongguk shakes his head. “It feels good.”
“Careful, baby.” Seokjin kisses his hip. “You’ll give me an ego.”
“If it gets your dick in me already, I’ll give you as much of an ego as you want.”
“Pushy.”
“Yeah.” Jeongguk sighs, shifting in Seokjin’s hold. “Now hurry up before I go find Taehyung.”
Seokjin snorts. “I’d love to see you try.”
“Why? Is he straight?”
“Worse. He likes someone else.”
“Oh.” Jeongguk props his weight on his elbows. “Namjoon?”
“Nope.”
“Yoongi?”
Both hands on his hips, Seokjin tugs Jeongguk closer. He pauses briefly to slather more lube on his fingers before pushing three into Jeongguk, and whatever Jeongguk was going to say dies on another loud moan. “Stop mentioning other men.”
“Why?” Jeongguk grins, cheeky. “Don’t want to think about other guys when you’re with me?”
Seokjin just rolls his eyes, pulling his fingers free and wiping the excess lube on Jeongguk’s stomach. His eyebrows raise, disappearing beneath his sweaty hair, when Jeongguk’s stomach clenches. But they’ve both reached the end of their tethers, and Seokjin doesn’t say anything as he tears open a condom to roll the plastic over his hard cock.
Jeongguk hooks his heels together behind Seokjin’s back, fingers seeking Seokjin’s on the fitted sheet as Seokjin slowly presses into him. The stretch wasn’t bad- Seokjin really had taken his time- but he moved so slowly. Jeongguk throws his head back with a groan, feeling every single inch as Seokjin gives it to him, breathing a sigh against Jeongguk’s neck when he finally bottoms out. Seokjin squeezes his hand, kisses his chin, and finally starts to move.
He builds a bruising pace and Jeongguk, perhaps a little more desperate than he had been willing to admit to himself, clutches his free hand around Seokjin’s shoulder, wanting to keep him close as Seokjin fucks hard into him. He couldn’t keep quiet if he tried, moans of Seokjin’s name tumbling from his lips at increasing volume.
Seokjin kisses him, lips messy and erratic to match the thrust of his hips. Jeongguk wraps his legs tight around Seokjin’s waist, wanting him closer than possible. He feels it each time Seokjin’s hips slam into his, each delicious length of Seokjin’s cock lighting a fire left to boil beneath Jeongguk’s skin. His nails dig into Seokjin’s back, aware he’s gripping Seokjin’s hand on the bed probably too tightly, but he can’t bring himself to let go.
When Seokjin shifts the angle, using his knees to balance his weight, Jeongguk cries out at the new sensation.
“Hyung,” Jeongguk gasps, writhing in Seokjin’s arms. He can feel the sweat building on his skin, panting desperately as Seokjin runs his tongue up Jeongguk’s neck. “More.”
“Yeah?” Seokjin kisses up his neck, catching Jeongguk’s lips in a harsh kiss. “You need more?”
“Yes,” Jeongguk groans, thighs tensing around Seokjin’s waist. “Fuck, come on.”
Seokjin’s soft laughter rumbles between their bodies. He thrusts harder, reaching deeper, adjusting the angle until he brushes Jeongguk’s prostate with each thrust; knocking consecutive moans from Jeongguk’s mouth.
Soon, Seokjin drags his free hand between them to wrap around Jeongguk’s cock, stroking him off in time with his thrusts. Jeongguk writhes beneath him, head thrown back against his pillow, skin hot and electrified everywhere it so much as touched Seokjin’s. Above him, Seokjin groans against his throat, kissing slick, sweaty skin as his pace becomes more erratic and desperate. Jeongguk could feel his release building in the pit of his stomach, body tensing as he tried to chase the curl of Seokjin’s hand on his cock.
“Ah, baby-” Seokjin kisses him again, their mouths wet and needy. “Fuck, Jeongguk-ah. I’m so close.”
“Me-” Jeongguk lets out a shout as Seokjin rubs his palm over the tip of Jeongguk’s cock, coaxing precum into his hand. “Too! Fuck! More. Just a little more, I need-”
Seokjin kisses him again, tongue shoved between his teeth as he works his hand faster, bringing Jeongguk closer and closer to the edge until the tension simmering beneath the surface of his skin finally reaches its breaking point and Jeongguk comes, back tensing and mouth falling into a desperate moan as he spills in Seokjin’s hand.
Spurred on by Jeongguk’s release, Seokjin kicks his hips faster, stroking Jeongguk’s cock until Jeongguk has to weakly push his hand away, bordering on overstimulation. He thrusts into Jeongguk a handful more times before he comes with a groan breathed into Jeongguk’s mouth, buried to the hilt.
They stay like that for a few minutes, panting against each other’s mouths as they come down together. Seokjin kisses him once, then two more times. Jeongguk likes this; likes keeping Seokjin close, wrapped around him like an octopus. What he didn't like, however, was the feeling of sticky, cold cum on his skin.
Finally he groans, pushing Seokjin’s shoulder lightly. Seokjin gets his hint, and rolls onto the other side of the mattress with a sigh. “Not bad.”
“Not bad?” Jeongguk snorts. “Can’t say that’s the reaction I was expecting.”
Seokjin hums, shifting to lay on his side and kiss Jeongguk’s waiting mouth. “You scratched the hell out of my back.”
Jeongguk can’t help it- he giggles against Seokjin’s lips. “Ugh. I need a shower.”
“I should get going before Namjoon and Taehyung become suspicious.” Jeongguk raises an eyebrow. Seokjin corrects himself, “Before they become more suspicious.”
“You can shower here.”
“That’s okay.” Seokjin twists a strand of Jeongguk’s hair between his fingers, somehow looking even more beautiful flushed from sex than before. “Rest tomorrow. You’ve got a long stretch of concerts coming up.”
Fingers splayed on Seokjin’s chest, Jeongguk hesitates before he asks. “Can I see you again tomorrow?”
“No,” Seokjin sighs. He brushes his fingers down Jeongguk’s bare shoulder. “This was our layover. We’re back at the airport in a few hours.”
“Where to?”
“San Francisco.”
Jeongguk purses his lips, pressing his face into his pillow as he tries not to feel too disappointed by Seokjin’s refusal. He knows it’s not personal. He’s had to cancel plans several times before due to flights or schedules or Jaehyun’s disapproval. Still, he’d been hoping to spend more time with Seokjin- and Taehyung and Namjoon- since meeting them.
“Okay,” Jeongguk says on an exhale.
They each slowly leave the bed. Jeongguk takes the fastest shower of his entire life, catching Seokjin before he finishes dressing to walk him to the door. They stay in the doorway for a moment longer, each leaning against the opposite wall.
Seokjin eventually breaks the silence. “If I said I wanted to do this again…?”
“I-” Jeongguk swallows, arms crossed over his chest. He hadn’t done a good job drying his hair and water was dripping down the back of his neck. “I’m not looking… I can’t do anything, um. Serious.”
Seokjin tilts his head, scrutinizing Jeongguk with soft intensity. “Who said I’m looking for anything serious?”
A weight lifts from Jeongguk’s chest. He claps his hands together, then unsure what to do with them, he offers two thumbs-up. “Okay. Yeah, cool. I’ll, uh, text you?”
“Yeah.” Seokjin leans in to kiss him, slow and deep, his hand fumbling with the doorknob. “Goodnight, Jeongguk-ah.”
“Goodnight, hyung.”
Jeongguk locks the door to his room and hides his smile behind his hands as he sinks to the floor.
Four shows in two cities.
An extra interview.
A taping for a radio show.
And Jaehyun working overtime to make sure Jeongguk went only from his hotel to his schedule and back again. Not even Yoongi, either waiting in Jeongguk’s dressing room or standing outside his hotel room, could stop Jaehyun when he was in one of his moods.
“The momentum is slowing,” Jaehyun says the night after Jeongguk’s second show in Dallas. They were together in Jeongguk’s hotel room, going over numbers while Jeongguk picked listlessly at his dinner of grilled chicken and steamed vegetables. Yoongi had tried to bring him to dinner with the rest of the band, but Jaehyun had adamantly refused. “You’re on tour, dammit. Album sales should not be this slow right now.”
“The album has been out for four months,” Jeongguk defends. “It’s doing fine.”
Jaehyun mutters. “For an album released by a nobody.”
“Man.” Jeongguk tosses his fork onto the place. “You already added three encore shows in Seoul. What more do you want from me?”
Jaehyun is quiet for a few minutes, tapping at his phone while Jeongguk stares sullenly at his uneaten food. “You’re going to meet with producers while we’re in L.A.”
“But-”
“It’s time for the next mini album.”
“But, I-”
“Eat your dinner, Jeongguk.” Jaehyun stands, stretching his arms over his head. “The car leaves before six.”
Jaehyun leaves and Jeongguk rolls the room service cart into the hallway. He’d promised on an earlier Instagram story to go live after the second Dallas show, but he knew that if he were to try to interact with his fans now, he’d only end up disappointing them. He curls into bed, missing his own sheets and comforter back in Seoul.
Stomach growling, Jeongguk pops a handful of M&Ms into his mouth as he watches a Halloween baking show. It wasn’t even Halloween.
He startles when he hears a knock at his door.
Not expecting anyone, Jeongguk fishes his phone out of his abandoned pants pockets. There were a few texts from his parents and one from Jaehyun reminding him when to be out of his room in the morning.
And two from Taehyung.
From: taetae [11:08pm]
Yoongi sent me to six different convenience stores btw
I’m not even supposed to be in the state
To: taetae [11:10pm]
???????
From: taetae [11:13pm]
just open ur door
Jeongguk does, and finds six individual ramyeon cups waiting for him on the floor of the hallway. It was the exact thing that Jaehyun kept away from him during promotions and tours. Jeongguk grins, gathering them into his arms. He pops a few more M&Ms into his mouth as he waits for the room’s coffee pot to produce enough hot water to heat each of the cups.
He sends a picture of the six cups to Taehyung.
To: taetae [11:28pm]
I owe you my life.
From: taetae [11:29pm]
Eat well, Guk-ah
Jeongguk does.
He might immediately regret it and fall asleep feeling absolutely sick to his stomach, but he certainly does enjoy each cup of ramyeon.
When Jaehyun had said Jeongguk would be meeting with producers in L.A., he thought it meant a few preliminary meetings to begin thinking about his next album. Instead, Jeongguk was forced to listen to a dozen producers he didn’t know- and, after hearing samples of their work, he didn’t like- each plead their case to Jaehyun as to why their song should be chosen.
The songs were shit. Even Jeongguk could tell. A bunch of nonsense songs meant to hit the charts fast, give him a few flashy headlines, and disappear almost immediately afterwards. It’s what Jaehyun had been trying to push over the last few years, and he’d finally gotten more support from the company after one of Jeongguk’s singles surprisingly debuted number one in the U.S. Jeongguk didn’t love that song, but it was now the one he was always expected to perform and talk about with any interviewer who gave him the chance.
Jeongguk wants to leave, but Jaehyun seems determined to give each and every producer the opportunity to deliver their entire pitch. He could feel a headache starting a random beat at the corner of his head. He giggles, a little delirious. It was a better beat than the one currently being presented to them.
Finally, after everyone had finished and it was only Jeongguk and Jaehyun left in the room, Jaehyun turned to look at him expectantly. “Well?”
Jeongguk pops the last of the M&Ms from the bowl on the coffee table into his mouth. “I don’t want any of them.”
“Too bad.” Jaehyun rolls his neck, letting out a sigh after a satisfying crack. “You’ll start recording once you’re back in Seoul.”
Jeongguk nearly chokes on his M&Ms. “It’s only been four months!”
“New groups and soloists are beating your numbers everyday. Plus, there’s some group’s fucking grand return everyone is talking about.” Jaehyun shrugs. “You’ll be forgotten if we don’t move quickly.”
Groaning, Jeongguk finally lets himself slump fully on the couch. He shoves his face into a pillow, trying to quell the urge to scream. The room was soundproof, but Jaehyun would be pissed.
Speaking of. Jaehyun gathers his things, throwing his belongings haphazardly into a backpack. “I’ll see you at the venue in the morning. Get some good sleep tonight. You look like shit.”
Jeongguk made sure to wait until Jaehyun was out of the room before raising both his middle fingers.
Since his travel and rest day had been hijacked by producers desperate to jump on the ‘popular Korean shit,’ (Jeongguk’s English may not be perfect, but he could tell when someone wasn’t in this shit for the actual music) Jeongguk could feel that familiar buzz starting in the tips of his fingers. That same anxiety he’s tried so hard to work through; the belief that he was doing something wrong by trying so hard with his music, by trying so hard to reach his fans. Jaehyun never seemed happy no matter what he did. And now, he had less than twenty-four hours before he’d be on stage in front of another sold-out crowd.
Jeongguk sighs, holding his breath deep in his chest until his lungs beg for air.
He checks his phone.
No new messages had come in since Jeongguk last texted Seokjin after someone on his flight recognized him and spent three whole hours just staring. The guy didn’t ask for an autograph or a picture or anything. He just stared.
He responds to some memes from Taehyung as his stomach growls, protesting the late hour without any food. Jeongguk packs up his things, shuts off the lights, and follows the sound of a familiar voice down the hallway.
Yoongi looks up when he knocks, sitting lounged on an office chair with a pretty electric guitar on his lap. He’d just been singing nonsense words as he fumbled with chords, but Jeongguk had always loved the sound of Yoongi’s voice. He’d tried for years to get permission for some of Yoongi’s vocals to appear on his songs, but no one ever entertained his ideas.
“Hey, Guk-ah.”
“Hyung.” Jeongguk tries to relax his shoulders. “Are you hungry?”
Yoongi grins, strumming a riff Jeongguk couldn’t quite name but definitely recognized from several songs. “Delivery should be here in a few minutes.”
“Can I-?”
“I ordered your favorites.”
Jeongguk could cry. “Thank you.”
“Sit.”
Jeongguk does. He kicks off his shoes and drops his backpack on the floor, flopping onto the couch across from Yoongi. Just like the room Jeongguk had spent all day in, this space was only a rental, but somehow it appeared so much more inviting than the one Jeongguk had been held hostage in. He knew he was being dramatic- the walls were the same bland color, the furniture was the same, and the sound board against the opposite wall had all the same buttons- but Jeongguk also knew without a certain manager around a lot of rooms felt warmer.
“So.” Yoongi plucks at a guitar string. “The songs were that bad, huh?”
“Yes,” Jeongguk groans. “It’s like- one singular English song does well and now everyone assumes all I want to do is make generic English pop music.”
“Mh.”
“Don’t get me wrong.” Jeongguk rolls onto his back, shoving one of the decorative pillows beneath his head. “I like music like that, but why is it the only shit I should be recording right now. Remember that song we made together? Like… Five years ago?”
Yoongi’s fingers go still. “I do. The pop ballad, right?”
“Yeah.” Jeongguk sighs. They’d gone through the full process of recording the song before Jaehyun shot it down. At the time, Jeongguk hadn’t thought much of Jaehyun’s disapproval. Until his disapproval reached the company heads, who also didn’t want it on the full album. So it was sitting there, collecting dust on one of Yoongi’s harddrives. “I mean, I get I’m not a great singer, but I’d like to try more challenging songs.”
There’s a knock on the door that Yoongi answers. Jeongguk sits up to help make room on the coffee table for the food. He’s starting to feel the weight of the day on his shoulders, body aching as they break their chopsticks, sitting shoulder to shoulder on the couch.
“You’re wrong, by the way.” Yoongi says sometime later, as Jeongguk is finishing up the last of the kimchi.
“Hm?”
“You are a great singer.”
“Thank you, hyung.” Jeongguk nudges the last of the pork towards Yoongi. “But you don’t have to try to make me feel better.”
“I’m not,” Yoongi chuckles. “Trust me, Jeongguk. There are a lot of people who would do anything for a voice like yours. And I’m not the only one who notices.”
He does five shows in Los Angeles. Three in a row and then two more after a day of rest. He doesn’t get the chance to do much between the shows, as Jaehyun gets him on a radio show, and then Jeongguk has two shows in Anaheim. He sleeps the entire car ride to the airport after that second show, only waking to walk from the airport to the car and from the car to the hotel.
Jeongguk does manage the energy to FaceTime his parents, putting on his best smile so they don’t worry about him. The San Francisco shows were his last performances in North America for the tour. He’d do three concerts in Brazil, then two weeks to stuff a few performances into London, Paris, and Spain before he’d finally be back in Seoul.
He had three days between Anaheim and San Francisco, and Jeongguk spent one of those days sleeping. When he finally emerged from his hotel room the next morning, he found Yoongi in the lobby.
“Look who’s alive.”
Jeongguk can’t muster a comeback. He shuffles to the breakfast buffet, grabbing only Jaehyun’s approved Tour Diet foods in case his manager were to pop up out of nowhere. The hotel they were staying at this time was known for its discretion for celebrities, and Jeongguk was glad. He was sure he looked a mess. The last thing he needed was for fans to see him.
“I’m meeting Namjoon at a museum in an hour,” Yoongi says as Jeongguk finishes shoveling eggs and toast into his mouth. “Do you want to come?”
“Really?” Jeongguk speaks around a mouthful of food. He quickly drinks half a cup of orange juice before continuing. “You want me to come?”
“I always want you around, Jeongguk-ah. But, uh. You should probably shower first.”
“Give me twenty minutes.”
Jeongguk rushes back to his room to shower and get dressed. He shoves a hat, mask, sunglasses and an extra sweater into his backpack and finds Yoongi exactly where he left him in the lobby.
They don’t see Jaehyun as they make their way to the parking lot, and Jeongguk can’t help but wonder if that was on purpose. Donghoon tags along, of course, but Jeongguk liked him. The museum was almost two hours from their hotel; their driver coasting expertly through early L.A. traffic all while Yoongi was on the phone with someone back in Seoul.
Jeongguk’s phone buzzes as he steps out of the car.
From: Kim Seokjin Hyung [10:09am]
Turn around.
Jeongguk does, his lips splitting into a grin as he spots Seokjin waiting on the steps of the museum. He sees Namjoon, too, and barely registers Taehyung flying down the steps before he launches himself into Jeongguk’s waiting arms.
“Oh, thank God.” Taehyung says, pressing his forehead against Jeongguk’s. “I thought I was going to be left alone with art nerds all day.”
“What if I’m an art nerd?”
“You’re sexy, so I’ll allow it.”
Jeongguk sputters, hooking his backpack over his shoulder as Taehyung laces their fingers together to start dragging Jeongguk up the steps. He stops halfway to wait for Yoongi, then links their hands together with a nod.
Namjoon manages to free Jeongguk from Taehyung’s hold to pull him into a hug. “It’s good to see you.”
“You, too.”
Jeongguk hesitates only a second before opening his arms for Seokjin. He melts into the hug then pulls back with a grin.
“Okay.” Namjoon says. “I got everyone’s tickets already. There’s a really great sculpture installation I’ve been looking forward to for months.”
“Yay.” Taehyung fails to sound enthusiastic, which only makes Jeongguk laugh.
The museum wasn’t too busy, and for that Jeongguk was glad. He thinks he recognizes a few people recognizing him, but they were left alone to explore the art. At one point he gets caught up with a children’s tour and only realizes when a little girl tugs on his hand to ask if he went to their school. Cheeks burning, Jeongguk quickly excuses himself and finds Taehyung staring with his head tilted at a sideways angle at a painting of a woman sitting at the top of a hill.
“Namjoon really wanted to come,” Taehyung says. “I wanted to find a water park.”
“It’s barely spring.”
“An indoor heated water park.”
“You’re not into art?”
Taehyung shrugs. “I mean, I like it. I think artists are incredible. I just don’t know how Namjoon can spend three hours staring at one painting and not feel like he’s losing his mind.”
“I guess.”
“Speaking of losing your mind.” Taehyung throws an arm around Jeongguk’s shoulders. “How’s the tour treating you?”
Jeongguk chews on his lower lip. “Honestly? I’m so fucking tired, bro. I love my fans and I love performing for them, but I don’t know why the company thought it was a good idea to squeeze an entire world tour in only a few months.”
Taehyung squeezes his shoulders, guiding the two of them around the room to a huge painting that took up nearly an entire wall all on its own. “I’m sorry, Koo.”
“No, it’s fine.” Rubbing at his eyes with the pads of his fingers, Jeongguk raises his shoulders in a weak shrug. “I shouldn’t complain. I’m living my dream, after all.”
For a long moment, Taehyung is silent. He looks at the painting when he speaks. “You’re allowed to be unhappy, even during happy times.”
They don’t talk anymore about it. Taehyung wanders over to find Yoongi as Jeongguk makes a quick detour to the bathroom and a vending machine he’d noticed earlier. Finally armed with a few snack pack sized bags of M&Ms, Jeongguk joins Seokjin on a bench against the wall outside a room dedicated to local artists.
“Hey.”
“Hey yourself.” Seokjin pockets his phone. He frowns, leaning close. “Did you cut your hair?”
“Huh?” Jeongguk swallows a mouthful of chocolate. “Oh, yeah. In Los Angeles. Jaehyun doesn’t want it to get too long, less I lose some of my ‘boyish charm.’ His words, not mine.”
“Oh. I liked it longer.”
Jeongguk tries to hide his blush. “How long are you guys in San Francisco?”
He hopes Seokjin gets the hint. “We were supposed to leave three days ago, but Namjoon wanted to get some time with Yoongi in the studio.”
“Why?”
“Yoongi often produces for Namjoon.”
Jeongguk pauses, a palm full of M&Ms halfway to his mouth. “He does?”
“Yeah?” Seokjin leans back against the wall. His sweater was oversized, revealing a tantalizing piece of his shoulder that Jeongguk felt the urge to bite. He chomps down on chocolate instead. “Did you think he was only your guitarist?”
“Well, no. But Yoongi never mentioned you guys.”
Seokjin shrugs. He holds out his hand and Jeongguk pours some candy pieces into his waiting palm. They stay there together for a while, occasionally seeing Taehyung drag Yoongi between art pieces. Jeongguk hadn’t seen Namjoon since the first exhibit.
Jeongguk swallows another chocolate. “You didn’t answer my question.”
“Hm?”
“How long are you in the city?”
A smile plays at the edge of Seokjin’s lips. “We fly out tomorrow afternoon.”
Jeongguk perks up. “Really?”
“Really.”
“There you are- Hyung!” Namjoon comes crashing through a nearby door, nearly knocking into a security guard and then tripping over his own feet. Donghoon steadies him, but Namjoon hardly seems to notice. “Hyung, they’ve got another piece of a set I’m collecting. Come see.”
Seokjin’s smile is fond as he lets Namjoon tug him to his feet. Jeongguk doesn’t get forgotten; Seokjin reaches for his hand to drag him behind Namjoon, who leads them excitedly down the hallway and up another flight of stairs. He speaks rapidly about the piece and the sculptor and how he’d had to fight pretty hard to even be allowed to buy a few pieces out of the set. Jeongguk can’t follow most of the history of the art- and he immediately forgets the artist’s name after Namjoon says it- but he’s completely enthralled with Namjoon’s excitement over the subject.
He could tell Seokjin was, too, because he lets Namjoon hang off him as he talks, pointing between small clay bowls and accompanying larger paintings. Jeongguk watches them with a smile of his own, glad he’d been given the opportunity to be a part of their afternoon together.
After finishing up at the museum, Donghoon drives them to a nearby In-N-Out for an early dinner. By the time they were done eating, Namjoon had found a park and somehow convinced them all that a walk would be a perfect end to their day.
Yoongi complains the entire time, even as Taehyung offers to carry his backpack and even offers to give him a piggy back ride. Yoongi just stares until Taehyung shrugs and continues walking. Jeongguk keeps pace with Seokjin, nearly vibrating out of his skin. He’s gotten to spend the better part of a day with Seokjin, but he still couldn’t touch him yet. Sure, the park was pretty empty, but Jeongguk didn’t think the rest of their friends would appreciate it if Jeongguk shoved Seokjin into the thick expanse of trees for some alone time.
Seokjin takes Jeongguk’s hand, linking their fingers together. “Relax,” he says quietly.
“Easy for you to say.”
“What do you mean?” Seokjin tilts his head.
“You haven’t been staring at the most beautiful guy on earth all day.”
Seokjin laughs, bumping their shoulders together. “Don’t be too hard on yourself. Not everyone can be a ten.”
Jeongguk doesn’t respond, brought back to earth only slightly by Seokjin’s hand around his. The trail was easy enough, so Jeongguk didn’t have to think too hard about where to step next. Instead, he could let his mind wander; remembering their night together in Dallas. How Seokjin had kissed him until their mouths were sore. How Jeongguk lost himself in the taste and smell of Seokjin until he’d fallen asleep with a smile on his face.
“Hyung,” Taehyung whines. Three heads turn to him immediately. “I can’t walk anymore.”
“Ice cream?” Seokjin suggests. “I think I saw a cart closer to the main area of the park.”
Jeongguk glares at him.
“Ice cream sounds good,” Namjoon agrees. “Then we better be getting back. Taehyung still has to pack.”
“Damn!” Taehyung throws his arms around Namjoon and Yoongi’s necks, keeping pace between them. “Catching strays from the expert of last minute packing.”
Walking behind them, Seokjin leans his head close to Jeongguk’s. “Calm down,” he says, a warm breath on Jeongguk’s ear. It did not, in fact, help Jeongguk to calm down. “We’ll be back soon.”
Jeongguk grumbles a few complaints, but his annoyance disappears as soon as Yoongi hands him an ice cream cone. He could almost forget that he’d missed half a dozen phone calls from Jaehyun or that in a few months he’d be releasing a mini album full of songs he didn’t care about. But as much as he enjoys spending the evening with Yoongi and his friends, he’s practically bouncing out of his seat during the car ride back to the hotel.
As they go their separate ways in the hotel lobby, Jeongguk texts his room number to Seokjin, waiting just inside his room. He paces, realizes he’s being ridiculous and stops, only to start pacing thirty seconds later. When he hears the first knock, Jeongguk flings the door open to grab a fist full of Seokjin’s shirt and drag him into the room.
“Fucking finally,” Jeongguk mutters, surging forward to close the distance between them.
Seokjin accepts him easily; hands on Jeongguk’s neck as their lips meet. He tries to say something against Jeongguk’s mouth, but Jeongguk doesn’t give him room to breathe, dragging Seokjin further into the room as he kicks off his shoes and gets to work on his pants.
Barely a second to catch their breath, Jeongguk tugs his shirt over his head and does the same for Seokjin. They kiss again, mouths desperate and messy; seeking each other’s taste. Jeongguk nearly trips over a pair of discarded shoes and steadies himself by grabbing Seokjin’s ass, making both of them erupt in giggles.
Gently, Seokjin runs his fingers through Jeongguk’s hair, eyes fond with something Jeongguk couldn’t name. “Hey.”
“Hey.” Jeongguk ducks his head, his heart tapping a staccato rhythm in his chest. It had barely been two weeks since they last saw each other, yet Jeongguk felt like a starved man finally presented with an endless buffet of Hot Guy. “Will you fuck me?”
Seokjin’s eyes darken. He kisses Jeongguk again, tugging Jeongguk’s bottom lip between his teeth. “Yes,” he breathes against Jeongguk’s mouth. “Of course.”
Jeongguk kicks out of his jeans as Seokjin gathers the lube from where Jeongguk had left it on the nightstand. He gives Jeongguk a look, raising an eyebrow, and Jeongguk only shrugs with a grin. “A guy has needs. Now take off your pants.”
He does, wiggling out of his underwear in a way that really shouldn’t excite Jeongguk as much as it does. With another quick kiss, Seokjin pushes Jeongguk against the wall, pushing his shoulder until Jeongguk faced the wall, his chest pressed into cold plaster as Seokjin crowded the space behind him. Warm breath hit his neck followed by Seokjin’s soft lips.
Teeth touch the lobe of Jeongguk’s ear. “Is this okay?”
“Yeah,” Jeongguk says too quickly. Hands flat on the wall, Jeongguk arches against Seokjin, feeling his hardening cock against Jeongguk’s ass. “Fuck, come on.”
To his credit, Seokjin doesn’t make Jeongguk wait very long. He pops the cap of the lube, Jeongguk’s body arching to follow the drag of Seokjin’s hand down his waiting skin. A sigh falls from his lips as he feels Seokjin work one and then two fingers into him, spreading his legs to give Seokjin better access.
Seokjin can’t keep his mouth off Jeongguk’s skin as his fingers work expertly within him, dragging his tongue and teeth across Jeongguk’s jaw, down his neck and to his shoulder, where he sucks skin between his teeth as he shoves a third finger in Jeongguk’s ass. The slight stretch makes him hiss, tensing briefly in Seokjin’s hold before he relaxes with a moan. Seokjin’s long, thin fingers brush his prostate, and Jeongguk can feel the smile against his skin as Seokjin purposefully angles his wrist to continue hitting the spot.
“Fuck, hyung.” Jeongguk pants, forehead pressed to the wall as he lets his eyes fall shut, his focus narrowing entirely to Seokjin behind him; the hand on his hip, the wet squelch of fingers working inside him, the plush lips on his skin. “I’m ready,” Jeongguk says around a moan. “Come on, already.”
Seokjin kisses his cheek. “Are you sure-?”
“Yes,” Jeongguk groans. He can’t help it; he rolls his eyes. “I’m not some fragile flower, hyung. I can take it.”
For a moment, Seokjin doesn’t respond. Then he shrugs, pulling his fingers free with a wet noise. “You’ll tell me if it’s too much?”
“Yes.”
Seokjin quirks an eyebrow.
“Yes, hyung.” Jeongguk shoves his ass against Seokjin’s hard cock, feeling pleased at the ragged breath Seokjin exhales. “Do you need me to beg for it? Because I will.”
“We’ll come back to that later.” Seokjin steps away for only a second, finding the condom where he’d dropped it among their discarded clothes. “Okay.” He pauses. “But give me another kiss.”
Jeongguk’s cheeks feel warm as he turns to Seokjin’s waiting mouth, shoving his tongue between Seokjin’s lips to avoid thinking too hard about why he liked kissing Seokjin so much. If he thought too much about it, Jeongguk might recall how little he kissed other hookups, especially the rushed ones between schedules in Seoul when he had a few free moments and another idol nearby who promised discretion. He doesn’t say any of that now, though. He just kisses Seokjin, rising onto his toes as he finally feels Seokjin guide his cock into him.
“Fuck,” Jeongguk breathes out, head falling back on Seokin’s shoulder as he bottoms out.
Seokjin laughs against his cheek, kissing the side of Jeongguk’s nose. “Good?”
“So fucking good, fuck.” He licks his lips, their bodies pressed flush and warm, Seokjin’s clean scent everywhere around him. He giggles. “Yoongi should have introduced us years ago.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah.”
Seokjin’s own patience runs thin soon, his hand on Jeongguk’s back to guide him into a bending position, giving Seokjin a better angle to fuck into him. Jeongguk’s hands curl on the wall, head hanging as Seokjin fucks moan after moan from Jeongguk’s lips. His skin grows hot, scalding everywhere Seokjin touches him. Hands on his shoulders, dragging down to his waist and squeezing every inch of skin he could get beneath his fingers. Jeongguk moans his name devolving into a curse as Seokjin cups his hands on Jeongguk’s ass, squeezing and kneading the flesh as he pistons his hips.
“You’re so-” Seokjin’s nails dig into the soft skin of Jeongguk’s ass, alternating between holding Jeongguk still or yanking him back on his cock. “Fucking hot, baby.”
“Yeah?” Jeongguk throws a cheeky look over his shoulder, the effect undermined by his flushed cheeks, sweaty hair, and the moan of Seokjin’s name tumbling from his lips.
Seokjin crowds him, shoving both of them forward until Jeongguk stood nearly flat against the wall. He couldn’t help but laugh, then groan as Seokjin uses the leverage to fuck him deeper, both hands on Jeongguk’s waist. Jeongguk fumbles blindly for one of Seokjin’s hands, letting his head drop on Seokjin’s shoulder as he brings the hand to his mouth, sucking two of Seokjin’s fingers between his lips.
Seokjin’s hips kick, groaning loudly against Jeongguk’s neck. His teeth touch skin, then he shifts instead to kiss Jeongguk’s shoulder, touching the pads of his fingers to the back of Jeongguk’s tongue. He lets Jeongguk do as he pleases, and Jeongguk takes full advantage; weaving his tongue over the digits, hollowing his cheeks as he sucks, body tensing each time Seokjin nudges his prostate.
His entire body feels too hot; Seokjin’s warm breath on his slick skin, his hand burning where he holds Jeongguk’s hip. With his free hand, Jeongguk links their fingers together on his hip, head filled with nothing but Seokjin’s taste. He moans around Seokjin’s fingers, lips parting as Seokjin hesitantly pushes them further in Jeongguk’s mouth, matching the pace of his hips.
“Baby,” Seokjin pants against his neck. “Fuck, Jeongguk-ah. You’re so good. So good for hyung.”
Jeongguk’s stomach clenches, moaning loudly. His cock bobs; heavy and untouched. “Hyung,” he gasps around Seokjin’s fingers. “I need- Shit-”
Hips kicking, fast and brutal, Seokjin gently pulls his fingers from Jeongguk's mouth and drops his hand to Jeongguk’s aching cock; stroking precum and Jeongguk’s own spit over the shaft. Head spinning, Jeongguk struggles between losing himself in each sensation and wanting nothing more than to watch Seokjin’s hand on his cock. Seokjin keeps a disconnected pace, moving his hand slower than his hips so Jeongguk can’t get used to the rhythm. It makes him groan, chest heaving. He’s surprised to feel wetness in the corners of his eyes, but his desperation wins out in the end.
“Please.” Jeongguk gasps, his hand on Seokjin’s wrist, nails sharp on skin. “Hyung- Hyung, please-”
He feels Seokjin’s grin on his neck, his hips slowing to a languid pace that makes Jeongguk cry out. “Please what? Use your words, baby.”
“Fuck you.”
“Hm. Not quite.”
Jeongguk groans, blood electric beneath Seokjin’s ministrations. “Please make me come,” Jeongguk nearly whines. He tries to kiss Seokjin, misses his lips, and mouth aimlessly at Seokjin’s jaw. “Please. Please, hyung. I want it so bad.”
Seokjin takes pity on him, picking up the pace of his hips and quickly matching his hand to the rhythm. Jeongguk’s moans rise in pitch and volume, body tensing as he feels himself approaching his peak. He thrusts into Seokjin’s hand, chasing that drop and wanting nothing more in that moment than to achieve his relief. He mumbles something against Seokjin’s skin until finally he feels the string grow taut and snap, sending him tumbling over the edge and spilling into Seokjin’s waiting hand with a loud moan. He can feel it when Seokjin follows seconds later, thrusting weakly before he stops, chest heaving against Jeongguk’s back as he slowly catches his breath.
Jeongguk mouths at his cheek until Seokjin gets the hint, tipping his chin to kiss Jeongguk properly. They stay like that until the sweat cools and Jeongguk grows uncomfortable.
He pushes Seokjin away. “I need a shower.”
There’s an awkward moment where Seokjin fumbles to pull out and dispose of the condom while trying not to touch anything with his free hand. Jeongguk tries not to laugh and does a pretty poor job at it, if Seokjin’s annoyed look was anything to go off of. He grabs a towel from the bathroom and tosses it to Seokjin, who quickly cleans his hand with a grimace.
“I’ll go-”
“You could stay,” Jeongguk says too quickly.
Seokjin pauses, head tilted. “Jeongguk…”
“Not, like, forever.” Jeongguk shrugs, suddenly hyperaware of their nude bodies. He doesn’t mean to stare, but every piece of Seokjin was just perfect; skin flushed with sweat, long limbs and smooth skin. “But I have Mario Kart.”
Seokjin laughs. “How could I refuse an offer like that?”
“Exactly.” Jeongguk grins, endlessly pleased with himself. “I’ll be quick. Order anything from room service if you want to.”
After a quick shower, Jeongguk finds an extra pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt to leave outside the bathroom door for Seokjin. He hadn’t brought the dock for his Switch- he hadn’t anticipated playing with anyone, after all- so he had to settle for placing the bulk of the device on a stack of books on the bed. He turns the TV to a familiar movie, then sits and waits for Seokjin to finish in the bathroom.
“I used your face lotion,” Seokjin says. He leaves the bathroom in Jeongguk’s clothes, running a towel over his wet hair. “Ready?”
“Yeah. Come on.”
They lay atop the bedcovers, both with a controller in hand. Seokjin had ordered a cheeseburger and fries, but Jeongguk waves away his offer to share. He’d already eaten too much crap that week, and Jaehyun wouldn’t be happy about his condition during his radio show appearance in the morning.
Seokjin beats him at every race they play together, giggling at Jeongguk’s ever increasing scowl. “Don’t take it too hard, Jeongguk-ah. I’m sure you have other talents.”
Jeongguk throws a green shell and misses, finishing the race a second behind Seokjin. “Is there anything you aren’t good at?”
“My geography isn’t great.”
Jeongguk rolls his eyes.
They play a few more rounds, the TV noise a quiet comfort in the room as Jeongguk’s fingers grow slow on his controller. Soon, Seokjin takes the controller before it can fall from Jeongguk’s relaxed hands. “Do you want me to keep the TV on?”
“Mnno.”
“Okay.”
He feels Seokjin’s fingers in his hair, soft between the damp strands. He thinks he feels the soft press of lips on his forehead, but Jeongguk’s eyes were too heavy to check, his mouth slacking with the promise of sleep. He feels Seokjin move off the bed, and then from the edge of the room a quiet, “Goodnight, Jeongguk-ah.” and then nothing at all.
The last leg of Jeongguk’s tour dragged heavy. He does his best not to let his fans catch onto his exhaustion. He makes sure to go live at least one night in each city, even as Jaehyun fills his precious few hours with radio appearances, interviews, and the occasional photoshoot. His longest break comes between the Brazil and London shows, where he gets almost a week for travel and recovery.
They have to change hotels after the first night in London, when Jeongguk gets back from the arena to find his room number had been leaked. Yoongi gathers Jeongguk’s things from his hotel room while Jeongguk waits in a car across the street, popping M&M after M&M into his mouth. Jaehyun was on the phone with someone from the hotel, taking full advantage of his English fluency to threaten the hotel manager.
“Okay.” Yoongi throws Jeongguk’s bags into the trunk, then hops into the car next to him. He holds his hand out and Jeongguk wordlessly passes him the rest of the snack sized bag. He immediately rips open another one for himself. “Let’s go. The rest of the staff will follow.”
“This is your fault.” Jaehyun glares from the passenger seat.
Yoongi’s expression flattens. “Mine?”
“Yes, yours.” Jaehyun relays the address of their new hotel to the driver, and they smoothly pull into the late night traffic. Jeongguk was ready to pass out, the adrenaline from that evening’s concert finally wearing off. “You’re always wandering off when we’re on tour.”
“I’m not the celebrity here,” Yoongi argues. “Maybe you leaked the address for a quick headline.”
Jaehyun flips him off.
Jeongguk turns to his phone.
To: Kim Seokjin Hyung [1:08am]
hey
From: Kim Seokjin Hyung [1:10am]
Why are you awake
To: Kim Seokjin Hyung [1:11am]
Changing hotels
From: Kim Seokjin Hyung [11:15am]
Oh yeah
Yoongi told me
Are you okay?
To: Kim Seokjin Hyung [11:16am]
I’m fine
I’m so fucking tired lol
For a while, Seokjin doesn’t answer. Jeongguk rests his head on the window, staring at the unfamiliar streets and buildings as they head to a hotel on the other side of the city. Jaehyun was still muttering something about not wanting Yoongi to have so much unrestricted access to Jeongguk.
Yoongi ignores him, typing furiously on his phone.
He’s half asleep by the time they reach the new hotel, wanting nothing more than to disappear in his room and only reappear for the next show’s soundcheck in two days. Donghoon helps Jeongguk carry his suitcases into his new room, promising he’ll be right outside until they are absolutely sure about this hotel.
Jeongguk just nods, stripping out of his clothes to quickly change into pajamas. He nearly misses when his phone rings, putting the call on speaker as he collapses into bed.
“Hello?”
Seokjin’s voice comes from the device. “I’m sorry in advance.”
“Huh?”
“Jeongguk!” He recognizes Taehyung’s voice. “Dude, you will not believe the size of this bird that stole my fucking sandwich today.”
Taehyung quickly begins reciting the entire story, starting three days earlier to “give you the whole picture.” Jeongguk grins, curled up beneath his sheets, listening to Seokjin try to wrestle his phone away from Taehyung, lose, and chase a cackling Taehyung through a hallway.
The tour finally finishes with three sold out shows in Seoul, an encore that Jeongguk hadn’t been looking forward to. His body felt on the verge of breaking down. For the entire first half of the tour, Jeongguk thought the dates in Paris would be the last stop. He’d conserved himself to make it that far, only for Jaehyun to throw the encore shows at him later on.
Still, Jeongguk puts on the best show he can. He sings his heart out, dances every step perfectly on time, and runs over every inch of the stage to greet as many fans as possible. He does an extra encore song, then stands below the stage for a few minutes longer than necessary; eyes closed as he listens to the cheers and screams echoing above him. A moment he desperately tries to commit to a physical feeling before the experience becomes a memory and a memory fades.
He goes live for only a few minutes to thank everyone with a promise of meeting again soon, then gathers his things. He would be going back to his apartment instead of a hotel room, and Jeongguk couldn’t wait.
His phone buzzes while he’s in the car. It takes him a minute to recognize what Seokjin sent him: a picture of his face on a large LED screen. Meaning Seokjin was there at the concert.
Meaning Seokjin was probably still nearby.
He quickly sends his address to Seokjin.
From: Kim Seokjin Hyung [10:52pm]
👍
To: Kim Seokjin Hyung [10:54pm]
omg at least try to sound excited
From: Kim Seokjin Hyung [10:55pm]
👍👍
Jeongguk rolls his eyes, grinning like an idiot at his phone. He all but jumps out of the car once his driver parks in the underground garage. He reaches his front door as he gets another text from Seokjin confirming he was on his way.
Too wired with energy, Jeongguk takes the stairs down to the building’s lobby, waiting there until he sees Seokjin walking to the front door. He’s there before Seokjin can even hit the buzzer, grabbing Seokjin’s hand and dragging him into the building. He heads for the elevator this time, bouncing on the balls of his feet. Seokjin watches, lips slanted in a fond smile.
When he kisses Jeongguk in the entryway of his apartment, he pulls away with a little wrinkle of his nose. “You stink.”
Jeongguk kisses him again, but Seokjin wasn’t wrong. He hadn’t bothered to change out of the clothes he wore for the concert’s encore, and his shirt had grown sticky with cold sweat. He glances over his shoulder, then grins at Seokjin.
“Shower sex?”
With an eagerness to rival Jeongguk’s, Seokjin tugs off his shirt, following Jeongguk to the bathroom and grinning all the while.
“Hey, Guk. Settle a bet for us?”
“Hm?” Jeongguk looks up from his ramyeon. He sat across from Taehyung and Hoseok- another one of Yoongi’s friends that Jeongguk had actually met before. He was Park Jimin’s manager. Jimin had been one of the few singers to extend kindness when Jeongguk was first starting in the industry. And considering Jimin’s major success as a soloist, Jeongguk would never forget it. “What’s up?”
Taehyung flips through a spiral notebook of lyrics and music notes. “Hoseok says Seokjin’s tattoo is on his left thigh, but I think it’s on his right.”
Jeongguk frowns, poking at his noodles. “Seokjin doesn’t have a tattoo on his thigh.”
“Hah!” Taehyung slams the notebook shut. “I told you. Pay up!”
Jeongguk watches Hoseok fish a few bills from his pockets, slapping them on Taehyung’s waiting palm with a scowl. Jeongguk laughs. “You put money on whether Seokjin had a thigh tattoo?”
“Oh, no.” Hoseok says. “We bet whether you’ve seen him naked.”
Jeongguk blanches.
“Don’t look so surprised, Guk-ah.” Taehyung reaches across the table to pat his knee. “You two aren’t exactly inconspicuous.”
Jeongguk turns back to his ramyeon, his cheeks burning.
Eventually, Yoongi returns to kick them out of his studio because he and Namjoon had ‘actual’ work to do. They run into Jimin and Seokjin in one of the open dance practice rooms. Jimin was actually dancing, while Seokjin sat against one of the walls of mirrors to record him. Jimin lights up when he spots them, twirling on one foot to close the distance between them.
“Hyung, did you-?”
Hoseok hands him a packaged kimbap without a word.
“Thank you,” Jimin tears open the wrapper. “Were you trying to kill me when you choreographed this song?”
“Maybe,” Hoseok ruffles his hair. “But you can do it.”
They settle near Seokjin on the floor with the rest of the food. The practice room was far from empty. An idol Jeongguk vaguely recognized was leading a group of young kids through a popular dance routine, while a trio of girls were growing increasingly frustrated with a move they clearly needed more people to pull off. Jeongguk digs out his bag of M&Ms from his backpack, sitting as close to Seokjin as he could without being obvious.
“Taehyung and Hoseok know,” he mutters.
“Hm?” Seokjin looks up from his phone. “Oh, I’m pretty sure Taehyung figured it out the first time. Then he told everyone.”
“Oh my God.”
“Don’t stress.” Seokjin takes a few M&Ms, their fingers brushing in the bag. “They won’t be weird about it.”
Jeongguk trusted Yoongi and Yoongi trusted his friends, but he was still a little wary. He watches as Hoseok and Jimin intently study the latest video of Jimin’s dancing, and notices the way Taehyung hesitates to lean close to Jimin, his body tense in a way Jeongguk wasn’t used to seeing. He nudges Seokjin, tipping his chin in Taehyung’s direction.
Seokjin nods.
Biting his lip, Jeongguk makes a note to ask about it later. Jaehyun had pulled some strings- strings Jeongguk did not ask him to pull- and starting in a week, he and Jimin would be the MCs for one of the weekly music shows. All the while Jeongguk would be recording his next album.
Even just thinking about it gave Jeongguk a headache. He chomps another mouthful of chocolate.
Jimin laughs at something on his phone screen, throwing his body in Taehyung’s direction. Taehyung tenses, unsure what to do with his hands as Jimin laughs against him. His cheeks burn a bright pink. Jeongguk sneaks a picture as quickly as he can.
“Jeongguk!” Jimin rolls backwards and into a standing position. “Dance with me.”
“Ah, hyung. Jaehyun already has me learning new choreography.”
Jimin ignores him. “Do you remember that dance we fucked around with? Last year?”
“Duh.”
“Come on.”
Jimin pulls him to his feet, guiding Jeongguk into the middle of the room. Hoseok finds the song and connects to the room’s speakers, then joins in. Taehyung follows quickly.
Waiting only a few minutes, Jeongguk reaches for Seokjin’s hand. Seokjin groans, making up excuses, but Jeongguk doesn’t give up. The actual group choreography doesn’t last long; everyone making up their own moves until they were each laughing, falling over each other, and Jimin took Taehyung by his hands to spin them both around the room.
Following a long day hosting a music show with Jimin, and later Jaehyun hating every single adlib Jeongguk tried to add to the first drafts of his new songs, Jeongguk punched in the code to Yoongi’s building. He takes the elevator, in the middle of texting a long food order to Yoongi for dinner.
He doesn’t look up from his phone until he hears, “Guk?”
Seokjin was standing in a doorway across the hall.
Jeongguk tilts his head. “You don’t live with Yoongi.”
“No, I don’t.”
He spots Seokjin’s hand on the doorknob. “Your place?”
Seokjin grins. “Want to come over?”
Jeongguk pockets his phone, eagerly following Seokjin through the door. From first glance, he could already tell Seokjin’s apartment was way nicer than his. He toes his shoes off by the door, rounding a corner to find Seokjin putting groceries away in the kitchen. “Can I get you anything?”
Jeongguk shifts his weight to his toes. “Can I get your dick?”
Seokjin sputters out a laugh. “Whatever happened to hello? How are you?”
“Hello, hyung. How are you? Can we have sex?”
“There’s lube in the drawer by my bed.” Seokjin points to a door down the hall.
Jeongguk tears his jacket off, followed by his shirt as he makes his way to Seokjin’s bedroom. The bed was perfectly made and there wasn’t a single article of clothing anywhere on the floor. Jeongguk quickly changes that, kicking out of his pants while he digs through the bedside drawer. He grabs the lube and makes his way back to the living room.
He frowns. “You’re still dressed.”
Seokjin raises an eyebrow. “I wasn’t aware I needed to be naked immediately.”
Jeongguk reaches for his hands, pulling Seokjin to the couch and shoving him down. He strips out of his underwear, his cock already showing interest, and settles on Seokjin’s lap. With hurried precision, Jeongguk drizzles lube over his fingers, raises himself onto his knees, and begins to work a finger into himself.
With a laugh, Seokjin runs his hands over Jeongguk’s body; fingers strong where they settle on Jeongguk’s hips. He hums, watching Jeongguk sink onto his own finger. “Do you even need me here?”
Rolling his eyes, Jeongguk nods. He works a second finger between his cheeks, spreading his legs for better access. “I need your dick, don’t I?”
“You’re so lucky you’re cute.”
“Touch me.”
“I am touching you.”
“Touch me better.”
Seokjin laughs again, arching his neck to kiss Jeongguk while his hands wander across exposed skin. He alternates between running his palms up Jeongguk’s bare back and over his shoulders, down to Jeongguk’s ass and squeezing. Jeongguk shoves a third finger into himself, sighing against Seokjin’s lips as he does so. He feels Seokjin’s fingers on his ass, touching Jeongguk’s own where they disappear within himself.
“Fuck.”
Seokjin hums against his mouth.
“Take-” Jeongguk crooks his fingers, cursing to himself. The angle was too awkward to bring himself much relief. He knew he was rushing it, but he worked three fingers quickly; stretching himself until he felt comfortable. “Take your pants off.”
“You’ll have to get up.”
“No.”
With a quick kiss, Seokjin nudges Jeongguk back just enough to unbutton his jeans, tugging his cock free with a quiet hiss of relief. He glances at the other end of the couch. “Condom?”
Jeongguk pulls his fingers free, wiping them on the hem of Seokjin’s shirt. He shrugs, tapping his fingers on the tip of Seokjin’s hard cock. “I’m clean. I don’t… I don’t want one. If you don’t.”
“What if I’ve been sleeping with other people?”
“Have you?” Jeongguk had no right to feel the piercing tug through his chest. They’d made it clear to each other from the beginning that they weren’t looking for anything serious. Just because Jeongguk’s schedule kept him away from people most of the time didn’t mean Seokjin also lived like a hermit. “I’ll go get one-”
“It’s fine.” Seokjin gathers him close, kissing Jeongguk until he feels lightheaded. “I’m clean, too.”
“Okay.” Jeongguk exhales against Seokjin’s mouth. He squirms. “Can we…?”
Seokjin hums. “Go ahead, baby.”
A hand on Seokjin’s cock, Jeongguk sits up on his heels again to guide himself onto the waiting length. He sinks down with a sigh, shuddering in Seokjin’s arms. He leans in for a kiss, shifting his weight until he adjusts fully to the heavy feeling of Seokjin inside him. Seokjin squeezes his hips, kissing Jeongguk’s chin and then down his neck. “Well?”
Jeongguk bites his shoulder.
He doesn’t think he gets his point across through the fabric of Seokjin’s t-shirt, but he doesn’t care. He quickly builds his own pace, letting the day’s frustrations melt away beneath the comforting touch of Seokjin’s hands all over his body. Seokjin can’t keep his mouth to himself, alternating between kissing Jeongguk’s lips, his jaw, down his neck, and to his chest. He nips at Jeongguk’s pec, making Jeongguk jump in his lap.
Jeongguk finds a steady rhythm, hands on the back of the couch to steady himself as he rides. He pants, shifting until he finds the best angle to feel Seokjin as deep as possible.
But it wasn’t enough. He lets out a frustrated noise, cupping Seokjin’s chin to bring their mouths back together. “Hyung,” he whines. He nods at his neglected cock. “Can you-”
“Hm, no.” Seokjin grins, cheeks red and lips parted as he breathes heavily. “Don’t give me that look, baby. You wanted this. So take it.”
“I hate you.”
“Sure.” Seokjin taps the tip of Jeongguk’s cock. “Can you cum untouched?”
“No.”
“Damn.” He squeezes Jeongguk’s ass. “Guess you’ve got a lot of work to do, then.”
Just for that, Jeongguk lowers his mouth to suck an ugly, blotchy spot on Seokjin’s neck; just high enough to be difficult to hide in the warm afternoons. But Seokjin stays true to his refusal. He touches Jeongguk, sure, but not where he wants it most. With an annoyed groan, Jeongguk drops his own hand to his cock, stroking rapidly. He lets his pace pick up, thrusting into his hand and then back on Seokjin’s cock.
His voice raises with each thrust, that cliffside drop waiting for him just out of reach. Screwing his eyes shut, Jeongguk chases his own release. He lets his world narrow to what he could feel: Seokjin’s dick hitting deep within him, Seokjin’s hands on every exposed part of his body, Seokjin’s lips making a home on Jeongguk’s neck.
He drops his head on Seokjin’s shoulder, moaning without abandon. Despite what he said earlier, Jeongguk feels when Seokjin takes pity on him, wrapping his own hand around Jeongguk’s on his cock and moving Jeongguk’s hand faster along his length. “Come on, baby.” He whispers in Jeongguk’s ear. “That’s it, Jeongguk-ah. You’re doing so good, baby. Go ahead and come for me, yeah? Go ahead.”
Jeongguk crests slowly, reaching his peak after only a few more thrusts. His body clenches as he does so, tumbling off the edge with a heavy sigh. He spills into his hand, slowing his pace to try and catch his breath. He realizes, though, that Seokjin hadn't finished.
“Hyung-”
“It’s okay.”
“Hang… Hang on.”
Unsteady and bordering on overstimulated, Jeongguk circles his hip, bouncing on Seokjin’s hard cock. Seokjin squeezes his hip. “Oh. Oh, baby-”
“Close?”
“Yeah.” Seokjin tips his head back on the couch, eyes closed as his breathing grows more and more unsteady. Jeongguk wants to count each individual eyelash on his cheeks. “Yeah, just- Keep going, ah, there.”
Jeongguk does, rolling his hips until Seokjin tenses, nails digging into Jeongguk’s skin, and he comes, buried deep within Jeongguk. Jeongguk kisses away his moan, slumping against Seokjin’s chest.
“By the way,” Seokjin says after a few minutes. He brushes the hair away from Jeongguk’s forehead. “Everyone’s coming for dinner tonight.”
“What!” Jeongguk sits straight up. “When?”
“Oh, in about-” Seokjin looks over his shoulder at the clock above the stove. “Ten minutes.”
“Why didn’t you tell me?”
“You seemed preoccupied.”
Jeongguk groans, climbing off the couch and standing awkwardly. “Where’s your bathroom?”
“First door on the right.” Seokjin grabs some tissues from the coffee table before he tucks himself back in his pants. “How are you with cilantro?”
“Fine, whatever.”
Jeongguk grabs his discarded shirt and races to the bathroom. He cleans himself in the shower faster than he ever had in his entire life. He curses himself for throwing his clothes in every random direction when he first arrived. He’s just getting his pants on when the door opens, Hoseok and Namjoon walking through- clearly in the middle of an argument over something related to music.
Jeongguk throws himself onto the couch, running fingers through his wet hair. Yoongi and Jimin were last. Yoongi immediately turned into the kitchen to help Seokjin with food. Taehyung, who had stopped between the living room and the kitchen, glances between the two rooms before he solemnly makes his way to the couch where Jeongguk was currently praying he’d disappear into the couch cushions.
Taehyung sits on the edge of the coffee table and holds out his hand.
Jeongguk gives him a high-five without looking up.
“What do you think about Jimin?”
“Why do you care?”
“Jeez, sorry.”
“No, fuck, I’m sorry.” Jeongguk sits up on the floor, giving Taehyung his best apologetic look. “I’m sorry, hyung.”
“It’s fine, Jeongguk.” Jeongguk shuffled around on the floor to sit with his back against the couch between Taehyung’s legs. Taehyung pats the top of his head. “This album has you stressed, huh?”
Jeongguk didn’t want to admit it, but Taehyung was right. Each morning, Jeongguk was shuttled to the studio to work on recording songs. Then in the afternoon, he was practicing choreography. It all led up to the evening, where he either hosted a music show with Jimin or was expected by Jaehyun to practice the dances or memorize lyrics on his own.
“Yeah.” Jeongguk sighs. “If the songs weren’t so fucking terrible it might not feel like pulling sixteen teeth every morning.”
Taehyung leans down to hug him, the angle awkward, but Jeongguk appreciated the gesture. “Now, about Park Jimin. Do you like him?”
“Of course.”
“But not the same way you like Seokjin.”
Jeongguk doesn’t ask him to elaborate. “No. I mean, we tried once.”
Taehyung uses his hand in Jeongguk’s hair to tip his head back. “You what?”
“Yeah,” Jeongguk chuckles. “He was one of the only senior idols to congratulate me when I got my first music show win, and I was completely obsessed with him. Genuinely thought I’d fallen in love with him just when he hugged me the first time. We were both a little drunk at a holiday party later that year, and, well…”
“Did you kiss him?”
“Yes.”
“Ugh.”
“Are you jealous?” Jeongguk grins.
“No.”
“You’re jealous.”
“I am not.”
“You shouldn’t be,” Jeongguk continues. “We decided we were better as friends before we even finished.”
“I can’t believe you kissed Park Jimin.”
“Mhm.”
“So if I kissed you, I’d kiss the lips previously kissed by Park Jimin.”
Jeongguk rolls his eyes. “And the lips that have been all over your groupmate, Kim Seokjin.”
“We all make sacrifices.”
“Gross.” Jeongguk pushes himself off the floor, stretching his arms over his head. The studio was starting to feel suffocating. The engineer who had been with them that afternoon had already left. Jeongguk vaguely remembered Jaehyun saying something threatening if Jeongguk didn’t finish at least one song by the end of the day. But it wasn’t Jeongguk’s fault. It was hard to finish a song that he didn’t even want to let his fans hear. “Keep your mouth away from me.”
“Just one little kiss.” Taehyung stands, too. He wraps his arms around Jeongguk’s shoulders. “I’ll pretend you’re Jimin and you can pretend I’m Seokjin.”
“Gah!” He wrestles out of Taehyung’s arms, the both of them giggling as Taehyung finally gives up. He ends his campaign with one quick smack of a kiss to the top of Jeongguk’s head. “Hyung!”
In the hallway, Jeongguk fishes into his backpack for another snack pack of M&Ms. “You should talk to him.”
“Who?”
“Don’t try to act coy, hyung. You were three seconds away from sniffing my lips to try and smell a five year old kiss.”
“God, I bet Jimin’s lips smell amazing.”
Jeongguk makes a face. “Just talk to him. Jimin’s, like, the nicest person I’ve ever met in my entire life. Even if he turns you down, it’ll probably be the kindest rejection you’ll ever face.”
“Fine,” Taehyung groans. “But if I have to change my name and flee the industry, I’m going to live under your bed.”
“Deal.”
“Kiss for luck?”
“Get the fuck out of my face.”
Taehyung snickers, swiping a few M&Ms before he leaves. He throws a quick wave over his shoulder as he disappears around a corner.
Shaking his head, Jeongguk enters the code to the door in front of him and walks into a room that was starkly different from the one he’d just left. The first thing he noticed was how much better the music playing through the speakers was. He recognized Namjoon’s voice through the small speakers, then spotted Namjoon where he was fast asleep on the couch. Also asleep, and wrapped in his arms, was Hoseok.
Yoongi was seated at the soundboard, his back to the door and headphones clamped firmly over his ears. He didn’t appear to hear Jeongguk walk in, but Seokjin looked up from where he sat on the second couch, a trashy gossip magazine held in his hands.
Jeongguk makes his way over, dropping his bag on the floor before he sits at Seokjin’s side. Seokjin hooks his arm around Jeongguk’s neck so they could both see the magazine. He points to the sleeping pair on the couch. “How long…?”
“A few years.”
“Really!”
“Mhm.” Seokjin flips through the pages. “It nearly tore our group apart. Namjoon was convinced they’d be breaking some rule, like anyone cares if a rapper dates someone else’s manager and choreographer. Please.”
Jeongguk rests his head on Seokjin’s shoulder. “Was he scared?”
For a long moment, Seokjin doesn’t say anything. Then, “Yeah, I think so. We were getting ready to go on hiatus, and it was going to be the first time the three of us were apart in years. I think Namjoon was scared of things changing too much too suddenly.”
“If you guys only went on hiatus a few years ago, why hadn’t I seen you during my promotions?”
Seokjin shrugs. “We never followed the typical route. Some of our songs charted well, but not enough for grand music show stages, or anything like that.”
“I’m sorry.”
“Don’t be.” He kisses Jeongguk’s cheek. “I’m making music with the people I love most in the world.”
“But we’re not making music together?” Seokjin nudges him, but wrapped in Seokjin’s arms, Jeongguk doesn’t go anywhere. He looks down at the magazine. “What are you reading?”
“Oh, just a lovely little gossip column trying to theorize why it’s taking us so long to release a new single.”
Jeongguk doesn’t read the entire article, but he does catch several unkind words. He frowns. “Why are you guys on a hiatus, anyway?”
“Taehyung was doing his military enlistment.”
“Oh.”
“A lot of people wanted Namjoon to go solo, to give up on our deadweight and return to his underground days.” Seokjin flips to the middle of the magazine, then slams it shut with a frustrated exhale. “Joon’s worried that no matter what we come back with, it’s going to be a disappointment.”
“I don’t think you could disappoint your fans.”
“Oh?” Seokjin curls his fingers in Jeongguk’s hair, playing with the soft strands. “Have you been listening to our music, Jeongguk-ah?”
Jeongguk feels his cheeks grow warm. “Maybe.”
“I suppose it’s only fair. Taehyung has had your repertoire on repeat for months now.”
“Oh, God.”
“You’ve got some good songs.”
“Key word: some.”
“Jeongguk-”
“Hyung.” Yoongi spins around in his chair, startling at the sight of Jeongguk on the couch. “Fuck, shit. Warn a guy.”
Seokjin’s hand stills in Jeongguk’s hair. “What’s up, Yoon?”
“Can you re-record this line for me?”
Seokjin stands with an exaggerated sigh, winking at Jeongguk before he steps into the booth. Yoongi talks him through the part he wants to work out, and Jeongguk gets to hear part of the song. It was the same bridge over and over again, but Jeongguk didn’t mind. He hadn’t been lying when he told Seokjin that he had been listening to their music lately. It was different from Jeongguk’s.
Even Jeongguk could tell that his music was trying too hard. It was all over the place. Like his management couldn’t decide if he was meant to be a pop idol, a rapper, or a ballad singer. There was very little cohesion to his music, not like the music Seokjin made with his group. They pulled from real life experiences and wove those into albums that told full stories. Their latest mini album- the one released just a month before Taehyung enlisted- was so raw Jeongguk had found himself crying in the shower as he listened.
He listens now, sprawled on the couch as Seokjin sings the same line in a dozen different ways while Yoongi frowns at his board of buttons. Jeongguk often forgot this was Yoongi in his happy place. He was so used to just seeing Yoongi as his guitarist.
Jeongguk frowns. Was he holding Yoongi back?
Namjoon startles awake, gently nudging Hoseok so he could stand and start offering his own suggestions on the song. Hoseok sleepily contributes, too, and it’s all so different from Jeongguk’s time in his studio. Yoongi and Namjoon argue back and forth over the pronunciation of one word. Seokjin sings the same line eight times until Yoongi likes the way it mixes with the drums. No one held a dictatorship over the entire experience. There was no stern presence in the corner handing out songs and only accepting the result if it was done exactly as originally written.
Jeongguk stares at the ceiling, listening to the laugher, the harmonies, and the way a new song starts to take shape just by Hoseok and Namjoon fucking around with a beat together. He closes his eyes.
“Hey.” Seokjin sits on the edge of the couch, hand on Jeongguk’s stomach. “You good?”
“I’m fine.”
“Okay.” He leans in, and Jeongguk is surprised when Seokjin kisses him in the middle of a room full of their friends. “We’re getting dinner. Come with us?”
“Yeah.” Jeongguk sits up and reaches for his backpack, but Seokjin has already hooked it over his own shoulder. “Yoongi,” he says in the hallway. “I haven’t heard your producer tag on any of my new songs.”
Yoongi threads their fingers together. “Jaehyun rejected everything I submitted.”
“Oh.”
Jeongguk hadn’t even had the chance to hear them.
“Jeon Jeongguk!”
“Oh, fuck.” He turns and sees Jaehyun standing at the end of the hallway, arms crossed and waiting expectantly. “Hyung-”
“Don’t even bother. You have a deadline tonight.”
“Right.” Jeongguk’s shoulders deflate. But he tries his best to smile as he waves and makes his way back to Jaehyun. He makes sure not to look too hard at any of their faces as he takes his backpack from Seokjin. “I’ll see you guys around.”
Jaehyun ushers him back into their rented studio space, and Jeongguk sings late into the night, never getting the song right for the producer and hating every single line he sings.
From: taetae [1:12am]
GUK
JEONGGUK
JEONGGUKFDNFJKNJFK
Jeongguk looks up from his Pokopia screen. He should have been asleep hours ago, but he couldn’t stop thinking about the look on Seokjin’s face as he shuffled down the hallway towards Jaehyun. His eyes burn as he reads Taehyung’s texts.
To: taetae [1:15am]
Yeh?
From: taetae [1:16am]
WE KISSED
WE KISSED!!!!!!
To: taetae [1:16am]
ON GOD?
From: taetae [1:20am]
we got ice cream after he finished dance practice
and
he went to wipe some chocolate sauce from my lips
And i was like
careful haha u’ll make me want to kiss u
From: taetae [1:22am]
AND HE GOES
‘well, why don’t you?’
I NEARLY CRIED BRO HE’S SO PRETTY
AND HIS LIPS DO SMELL GOOD
To: taetae [1:23am]
congrats bro
Happy for u
From: taetae [1:23am]
Thank u bro
owe it all to u
promise u the first mention in my wedding vows
To: taetae [1:25am]
omg go to bed
From: taetae [1:27am]
I hope i dream of jimin
Jeongguk wants to be a Certified Hater, but he can’t help but smile. He sends back a handful of excited emojis. And for good measure, he sends a picture of himself with a thumbs-up to Jimin.
From: taetae [1:33am]
HE’S TEXTING ME AGAIN
HE WANTS TO DO MORE THAN KISS
WHAT DO I DO
I DID NOT “PREPARE” FOR THIS
To: taetae [1:35am]
I do NOT want to hear anymore
From: taetae [1:37am]
Right right
I’ll give you a full rundown tomorrow
To: taetae [1:37am]
NO!!!!!!!!!
Halfway through another rough day in the studio, Jeongguk sends a text.
To: Kim Seokjin Hyung [2:12pm]
can I come over tonight?
From: Kim Seokjin Hyung [2:15pm]
Of course
He doesn’t get out of the studio until long after the sun has set beyond the horizon. Jaehyun had wanted him to stay, but Yoongi- finally a part of their sessions to record some of the guitar parts- put his foot down when he recognized Jeongguk curling into himself on the sofa. Jeongguk claimed it was just a headache. Regardless, Yoongi packed his things into his backpack and led him out of the building himself.
Donghoon drives him across the city, offering to make a stop to pick up food or tea, but Jeongguk just asks to be dropped off outside Seokjin’s building. He rings the doorbell out front, waiting for the click before he heads inside. Seokjin had given him the code to the apartment some weeks ago, and Jeongguk’s hands shake as he punches in the four numbers.
“Jeongguk?”
“It’s me.”
“Hey.” Seokjin takes his backpack and helps him out of his jacket. “Are you-?”
Jeongguk surges forward to kiss him and misses, stumbling into Seokjin’s arms with a groan.
“Woah, okay.” Seokjin wraps him in strong arms. He kisses Jeongguk’s waiting mouth. “Hello to you, too.”
“Mphf.”
“You’re hot.”
“Thank you.”
“No, you doofus.” Seokjin presses his lips to Jeongguk’s forehead, holding them there for a long minute. “You have a fever. Were you working like this?”
“I’m fine.”
“You clearly are not. And I’m not letting you kill yourself in my apartment. I’m not nearly prepared enough to hide a body. Come on.”
Seokjin leads him further into the apartment and gently pushes him to sit on the couch. Jeongguk catches his hand before he can walk away. “No, hyung. Don’t go.”
“I’m not going anywhere.”
“I want you.”
Seokjin strokes the hair out of Jeongguk’s face, the strands long enough to fall into his eyes now. “How about this? Let me make you some tea, and then we can discuss getting naked.”
“M’kay.”
He’s startled awake a few minutes later- completely unaware that he’d even closed his eyes- as Seokjin returns with a large mug of hot tea. Jeongguk takes the mug into his hands, breathing steam deep into his lungs while Seokjin sits on the edge of his coffee table.
“I can go,” Jeongguk says between tiny sips.
Seokjin looks confused. “What are you talking about?”
“I probably look terrible. There’s no way you want me around for sex tonight.”
“Guk,” Seokjin sighs. He pinches the bridge of his nose. “Want to take a bath?”
Jeongguk knows he should say no; that he should just call Donghoon to take him back to his tiny apartment, but the offer of a warm bath to accompany his hot tea was nearly enough to bring tears to his eyes. Jeongguk had spent the entire week going from the studio to his bed and back to the studio. Even just seeing Seokjin instead of Jaehyun’s smarmy face in his field of vision was a welcome change.
“Yes,” Jeongguk whispers. “I’d like that a lot.”
“Okay.” Seokjin leans in, pressing a soft kiss to Jeongguk’s cheek. “Drink your tea. I’ll be right back.”
Ten minutes later, Seokjin takes the empty mug from Jeongguk’s hand and gently shoves him to the bathroom with a fluffy towel and a change of clothes in his arms. Jeongguk strips out of his clothes and sinks into the hot bath with a happy noise, lowering himself into the water.
He stays there, his mind finally quiet for the first time in days, while his skin grows clammy and his pulse pounds against his temple. Only when the water eventually starts to cool does Jeongguk hurriedly wash his body, dunking his head to rinse out the shampoo. The clothes he changes into smell like Seokjin.
He returns to the living room to see Seokjin on the couch. Seokjin looks up, his lips set in a small smile. “What’s your favorite movie?”
“I’ve been on a Spider-Man kick lately.”
“Into The Spider-Verse, it is.”
“Fuck yeah.”
He settles on the couch next to Seokjin, who quickly starts the movie and then tugs a blanket over both of their laps. Seokjin hands him a painkiller and another hot mug of tea. Jeongguk accepts both, snuggling into Seokjin’s side. He notices a bowl on the coffee table, and grins as he reaches for a handful of M&Ms.
“Feel any better?”
“Much,” Jeongguk sighs. He leans against Seokjin. “Thank you, hyung. Sorry I’m no good for sex tonight.”
“Would you stop apologizing for that?” Seokjin wraps an arm around his shoulders. “I just hate seeing you sick. I could kick Jaehyun down a flight of stairs.”
“I’m okay,” Jeongguk says around a mouthful of chocolate. “Really. I’m just a little tired.”
“Mhm.”
They fall quiet for a while, both of them watching the movie and picking at the bowl of chocolates. Twice, Seokjin stands to fix Jeongguk another mug of tea. “I’ve been meaning to ask, what’s with the M&Ms?”
Jeongguk puts his empty mug on the coffee table. “I quit smoking last year,” he explains. “But I found I needed something to do with my hands. Lollipops were good for a while, but someone suggested chocolate whenever I felt a craving, so.” He shrugs. “I don’t really crave cigarettes anymore, but now I’m a little addicted to chocolate.”
“I think that’s a fine addiction to have.”
“I don’t hate it.”
“Are you hungry?”
“Yes.”
“Good, because I already ordered food.”
Seokjin doesn’t let Jeongguk help when the food arrives, setting out rice and meat and a thick stew that he immediately hands to Jeongguk; still swaddled on the middle of the couch in a heavy blanket. Jeongguk can’t help the smile on his face, hiding it as best he could in mouthfuls of food. They talk sporadically; Seokjin talks about the album making process and how Taehyung and Namjoon had been butting heads over some of the songs currently in contention to make it on the final album. They’d gotten into an argument earlier that week that led to the two of them refusing to be in the same room together until Seokjin took them both to lunch and reminded them that they were being idiots. Jeongguk talks about hosting the music show with Jimin, and how Taehyung had been hanging around the building more since his first date with Jimin.
To Jeongguk’s relief, Seokjin doesn’t ask about his own upcoming album. Jaehyun was pushing for an early summer release, and the looming deadline was making Jeongguk sick to his stomach. Nothing about the album was coming together nicely. Usually Jeongguk was sold on a song by the time he finished recording it, but he’d had such trouble with every song they sent him into the booth to work on that he was beginning to hate every note and chord he heard.
It certainly hadn’t helped that Jeongguk spent the entire week with a pounding headache until Yoongi all but forced him out of the building. But Jeongguk didn’t want to sit wrapped in blankets on Seokjin’s couch, snuggled against Seokjin’s broad chest, and complain about the job he’d always dreamed of pursuing.
So instead he talks about Jimin. He talks about Yoongi fucking around on the guitar during recording breaks. He talks about the music show and the makeshift dance practices he’d been having with Hoseok.
Seokjin lets him talk, his head growing heavy against Seokjin’s shoulder. His fingers card through Jeongguk’s hair, soft and warm against his scalp. He feels a soft pressure on his forehead; a quick kiss while Jeongguk mumbles something about the tour Jaehyun was already planning to begin late in the summer.
As the movie credits roll, Jeongguk shifts slightly against Seokjin. “I should… Go.”
“I suppose you should.”
“Okay.” Jeongguk’s eyes fall shut again. “Donghoon should still be in the area.”
“I have an extra toothbrush.”
Jeongguk stays quiet for a long moment.
Finally, he whispers. “Okay.”
He comes back from the bathroom a few minutes later, catching Seokjin as he finishes cleaning up the food containers and folding the blankets they’d been using. He offers to help, but Seokjin just waves him away. So Jeongguk shrugs, and makes his way to Seokjin’s bedroom, crossing into new territory.
He’s been in Seokjin’s room before, most notably last week when Jeongguk stopped by in the middle of his lunch break and Seokjin ate him out until he was shaking. They’ve spent plenty of time in each other’s bedrooms by this point, but they’ve never spent the night.
For a minute, Jeongguk stands in the doorway; chewing on his bottom lip as he worries. Neither of them were looking for anything serious. And sleeping in the same bed didn’t automatically mean something was getting serious. Jeongguk had slept plenty of times in Yoongi’s bed before. Sure, that was usually when they were on tour and Jeongguk needed a break from Jaehyun breathing down his neck, but still! Hell, Taehyung had spent the night earlier that week, snuggled under Jeongguk’s blankets and telling him intimate details about all of Jimin’s most recent tattoos.
So Jeongguk shrugs. Pulling back Seokjin’s comforter, Jeongguk gets comfortable on the left side of the bed. He closes his eyes.
And waits.
Then he frowns.
From what he could tell, the apartment was completely quiet. He couldn’t hear Seokjin in the bathroom or walking around the unit making sure everything was locked up for the night. Jeongguk checks the clock on the nightstand, counts to thirty in his head, then kicks the blankets away.
Seokjin was lying on the couch, watching a quiet video on his phone.
“What are you doing?”
“Fuck!” Seokjin startles, tilting his head back to look at Jeongguk and squinting in the absence of light. “Warn a guy, jeez.”
Jeongguk kicks lightly at the couch. “Hyung.”
“Yes?”
“What are you doing!”
Seokjin looks between Jeongguk and his own body laid out on the couch. He was much too tall for it to be comfortable to stretch out, Jeongguk figured. “Going to sleep.”
“Why aren’t you in bed with me?”
“Oh, I…” Seokjin fumbles with his hands. “I didn’t think you’d want that.”
“Hyung.” Jeongguk rubs at his forehead, his head protesting the late hour. He needed sleep and maybe fifteen more painkillers. “Either you come to bed with me, or go ahead and make room on that couch.”
Laughing gently, Seokjin works his way out of the blankets with his hands raised in surrender. “Okay, baby. Let’s get you to bed.”
“Good.” Jeongguk wraps his arms around Seokjin’s waist, the two of them shuffling towards the bedroom. “Don’t do that again.”
They separate only briefly to slip into bed, and Jeongguk, exhausted nearly to the point of pain, wastes no time shuffling into Seokjin’s waiting arms. He tucks his head under Seokjin’s chin, mumbles something that could pass for goodnight, and falls asleep before he could hear Seokjin’s reply.
Jeongguk wakes slowly. He registers the gradual warmth of the sun on his face, the blankets tangled around his legs, the weight of another person’s limbs intertwined with his.
The sun on his face…
He jerks awake, sitting straight up in bed.
“Fuck, oh fuck.”
“Mn.” Seokjin curls into the warm spot on the bed, cracking one eye open. “Guk?”
“I’m late.” Jeongguk doesn’t even need to check the time to confirm it, but he catches sight of the digits on the bedside clock and feels that familiar weight begin its slow suffocation in his chest. “I’m so fucking late. I have to go right now.”
Seokjin’s arm curls tight around his waist. “Jeongguk-”
“I gotta call Donghoon.”
“Jeongguk.”
“Jaehyun is going to kill me-”
“Jeongguk!” Seokjin pulls him onto the bed and then rolls himself on top of Jeongguk, holding his weight above Jeongguk’s body on his elbows. “Relax. Please.”
Jeongguk fidgets beneath him. “Hyung, I have to go. Jaehyun is already mad at me-”
“Yoongi and I spoke last night,” Seokjin says. “I told him you’d shown up with a fever and he ripped into Jaehyun. You’re taking the day off.”
“I’m…” Jeongguk curls his hands into fists in the sheets. He makes a conscious effort to relax his hands. “I can’t. I’m so behind.”
“Too bad. You’re not going in today.”
Hands moving to cover his face, Jeongguk lets out a shaky exhale. “I’m so behind.”
“My love,” Seokjin whispers. He kisses Jeongguk’s cheek, the corner of his nose, and his forehead. “You’ll work yourself to death.”
Jeongguk groans, slapping his hands on the bed. He glares up at the ceiling, picturing the look on Jaehyun’s face while Yoongi ripped him a new one. He can’t help it. The thought makes him smile. Even though he was behind. Even though he hated the album. Even though Jaehyun would likely keep him locked in the studio for the next three weeks without a break to make up for missing one single day, in this one moment it felt like a win.
He moves his hands to Seokjin’s biceps, then throws his arms around Seokjin’s shoulders. “You swear I have the day off?”
“I swear.”
“Okay.” Jeongguk nods to himself. “Okay.” He hesitates. “What do I do?”
“On your day off?”
“Yeah.”
Seokjin laughs, not unkindly, and tucks Jeongguk’s hair behind his ear. “Whatever you want to do. You could sleep until noon.”
“I’m way too wired to go back to sleep.”
Tilting his head, Seokjin hums. “Well, you can do anything you want.”
Jeongguk shifts his body, letting his legs fall open as best he can while the lower half of his body is still tangled in the sheets. “Anything?”
Seokjin lets his hand drag heavily down Jeongguk’s body, gripping him through his sweatpants where Jeongguk was already starting to harden. “Seriously?”
“You said anything, hyung.”
“Mh, I did.”
“Well?”
“You’re insatiable.”
Jeongguk grins. “Come on, hyung. We gotta make the most of my day off.”
Shifting his weight, Seokjin works the blankets and Jeongguk’s pants down his legs in order to make quick work of Jeongguk’s boxers. “But I’m not kissing you.”
“What!” Hurt flashes across Jeongguk’s face.
“Relax, baby.” Seokjin rolls his eyes, fond. He kisses the tip of Jeongguk’s nose. “Morning breath.”
“Fine. But I expect a hundred kisses before breakfast.”
Seokjin gives him one more kiss to the cheek. “Deal.”
He moves to sit on his heels, yanking Jeongguk’s pants and boxers down his legs and off his body. He struggles with the blankets for a brief second, shooting Jeongguk a weak glare as he deals with all of the fabric. Eventually, he gets Jeongguk naked from the waist down, leaning in to lick a wet strip up the length of Jeongguk’s half-hard cock.
Jeongguk sighs, relaxing further into the bed. His hand falls automatically to Seokjin’s hair, fingers tangling in the soft strands as Seokjin pushes his thighs further apart. Eyes drifting closed, Jeongguk sinks into the bed as Seokjin finally takes him into his mouth.
Seokjin takes his time with it; working Jeongguk to full hardness with slow, precise moves. He alternates between taking Jeongguk between his lips and trailing his tongue up and down the shaft. He mouths along the vein on the underside, collecting precum on his tongue and sinking down once more.
“Ah, hyung.” Jeongguk’s hips kick, but Seokjin holds him in place with strong hands on his thighs. He moans, quiet and content to let Seokjin do whatever he wants.
And Seokjin takes full advantage of that. He drags one hand beneath Jeongguk’s shirt, brushing his fingers across Jeongguk’s chest and tweaking a nipple to make Jeongguk’s breathing stutter. He presses a kiss to Jeongguk’s hip, then takes Jeongguk fully into his mouth.
“Oh, fuck.” Throwing his free arm over his eyes, Jeongguk chokes out a long moan as Seokjin takes him deep into his throat and sucks. “Shit!”
Seokjin pulls off with a wet sound. Jeongguk feels it when he reaches for Jeongguk’s arm to lay it flat on the bed. “Don’t look away, baby.”
“Oh my God.”
Jeongguk’s chest heaves as Seokjin sinks down on his cock again, mouth full of spit and throat constricting. His eyes threaten to roll to the back of his head, but Jeongguk uses all his resolve to keep his eyes on Seokjin, watching each time he bobs his head; hearing each filthy sound as it escapes Seokjin’s lips.
“H-Hyung…”
A strong swallow from Seokjin causes a groan to fall from Jeongguk’s lips, his legs shaking where Seokjin holds them down. He loses himself entirely in Seokjin’s ministrations, his body hot where Seokjin touches him and his cock aching and desperate for relief. He moans again, louder as Seokjin slips his hands around Jeongguk’s waist to cup his ass and encourage him to roll his hips against Seokjin’s face. Jeongguk does, desperation mounting as his peak teases the edge of his thoughts.
Seokjin hums around him, making Jeongguk shudder. He picks up his pace, mouth sinking farther on Jeongguk’s cock until Jeongguk’s body grows tense, thighs straining to close and hand clenching in Seokjin’s hair. He barely gets the words out to warn Seokjin, rambling, “close, close- Hyung, I’m- fuck, hyung-!”
He comes with Seokjin’s name on his tongue, a shout and a promise, cock buried deep in the warm heat of Seokjin’s mouth as Seokjin works him through it with practiced surety. He deflates, boneless with satisfaction, melting back on the bed. Jeongguk watches Seokjin wipe his mouth with the back of his hand, grinning as Jeongguk works to catch his breath.
“Fuck.” Is all Jeongguk can say.
“Good?” Seokjin leans in, using teeth and tongue to suck a mark on Jeongguk’s inner thigh.
“Yeah,” Jeongguk sighs. He grins, giggling to himself. “You’re so good at that.”
“You’re not bad at them yourself.”
Still giggling, Jeongguk uses his hold on Seokjin’s hair to pull him close. But he respects Seokjin’s rule not to kiss with morning breath, choosing instead to pull him into a hug. Seokjin rests his weight on top of him, and Jeongguk never wants to let him leave.
Eventually, though, Seokjin pulls back. “I need to shower.”
“M’kay.”
“Are you okay with leftovers for breakfast?”
“Sounds perfect.”
“Good.” Seokjin kisses the corner of his mouth. “Good.”
Despite Jeongguk’s earlier protests, he ends up falling back asleep while Seokjin is in the shower. When he wakes, he changes into a clean pair of Seokjin’s sweatpants and a long-sleeve shirt. He uses the bathroom and joins Seokjin in the kitchen for what ends up being a very early lunch of the previous night’s dinner.
Jeongguk hadn’t been lying when he said he didn’t know what to do on a day off. His last days off had been while he was on tour, and Jeongguk didn’t count those. He spent those days recovering from concerts and preparing for the concerts that were still to come. So when Seokjin suggests they take a walk, Jeongguk is eager to agree.
Seokjin lived close enough to walk to a nearby grocery store. The early afternoon was warm for spring and the perfect weather for a walk. Jeongguk follows Seokjin around the store, watching him choose between cuts of meat or different stalks of produce. He lets Jeongguk throw some snacks into his basket, raising his eyebrows as Jeongguk dumps three boxes of his favorite cookies on top of the dry noodles.
They take their time walking back to Seokjin’s building. Jeongguk spots Donghoon, staying close but out of arm’s reach as they’re ducking into a stationary store so Seokjin can look at pens.
“Namjoon likes to use silly pens when he’s got some kind of block,” Seokjin explains. He grabs a pack of pens with duck shaped caps on them. “Yoongi will protest, but I’ve watched him write plenty of nasty beats with a sparkly pink pen.”
“Really?” Jeongguk chooses a heat-activated color changing pen, taking the sets from Seokjin so he could pay for them. Seokjin tries to protest, but Jeongguk just dances around him to the cashier, slapping his card on the counter. “I don’t think I’ve seen that.”
“Hm.” Seokjin opens his messenger bag to let Jeongguk pour all the pens into it. “How often are you around Yoongi when he’s writing songs?”
“Not often at all.” Jeongguk shrugs. “The company prefers to use Jaehyun’s favorite songwriters. If they use anything of Yoongi’s, it’s already written long before we start on my album.”
“Jesus.”
“Oh, hyung. Let’s stop in Olive Young.”
Jeongguk bounces between stores, picking out a few new shirts for himself and a sweater he thinks would look good on Seokjin. He grabs a few toiletries he knew he was running out of, and then Seokjin was tugging on his arm to lead him back to the apartment, claiming he was out of hands and pockets and anywhere else Jeongguk was looking to store purchases.
Back at the apartment, Seokjin changes into his new sweater and kisses Jeongguk for a long moment, until Jeongguk’s breathing grew heavy and his hands curled in the hem of said sweater. But Seokjin pulls away with a wink, saying, “Yoongi is expecting us.”
“He can wait.”
Seokjin squeezes his ass, then pushes him out the front door.
They cross the hallway to Yoongi’s apartment, waiting only a minute for Yoongi to answer the door. He was in the middle of preparing ingredients for dinner, which Seokjin quickly jumps in to help with. Jeongguk wanders further into the apartment, finding Jimin and Taehyung writing together in a notebook. Well, perhaps to say they were ‘writing’ was being generous. There was a smattering of unfinished lyrics over the pages, and a lot more instances of little messages and handwritten smiley faces.
Hi
Hi
tete ♥️ jimin
Jeongguk could even see little attempts at poetry, and some raunchy things he was glad to see crossed out. He leans closer, tilting his head, and immediately regrets it once he realized what the picture Jimin was currently shading really was.
tae
Yes bb
I think jeonggukie is reading these
nah
hey jk are u reading this
“I very clearly am.” Jeongguk interrupts, smiling despite himself.
Jimin snickers, pulling him into a tight hug. “How was your day off?”
Jeongguk feels himself blush as Taehyung smacks a wet kiss to his forehead. He wipes his hand across his skin. “Does everyone know about that?”
“Yup.” Jimin pops the syllable. He leans close, whispering. “My entire dance crew was talking about Jaehyun today. None of us were even at your company building today, but they all knew how unhappy he was.”
Jeongguk swallows the lump in his throat and tries to smile despite the uneasy feeling in his stomach. “Well. My day was great.”
“Yeah?” Taehyung leans in close. “We saw you arrive with Seokjin.”
“And that’s all you’re going to know about that.”
Taehyung boos. Then he sits back. “We finally convinced Yoongi to update his video game collection. You want to play Just Dance?”
Jeongguk glances over his shoulder, looking towards where Seokjin and Yoongi were both chopping different vegetables. “Shouldn’t we help with dinner?”
Jimin shrugs, practically climbing into Jeongguk’s lap as Taehyung starts fiddling with Yoongi’s TV. “Yoongi already kicked us out of the kitchen. Twice. But if you can’t stand to be away from Seokjin…”
Jeongguk elbows him .
A friendly game of Just Dance quickly devolves into competitive madness when Taehyung earns a high score just by swinging his wrist to the general beat of the songs they choose. Hoseok and Namjoon arrive sometime between Jimin accusing Taehyung of hustling them-
“How!” Taehyung argued. “We didn’t put any money on this!”
“You asked for a kiss every time you win!” Jimin argued.
“I am simply trying to fulfil my lifetime dream of kissing Jeongguk.”
“I will kick you down a flight of stairs.”
-and Jeongguk finally taking a commanding lead after picking a few songs where Taehyung’s lazy arm swinging couldn’t carry him to an easy victory. Hoseok immediately jumps in, and though Namjoon initially tries to help in the kitchen, he soon joins them in the living room. He waves away their offers to alternate with the controller, his head buried in a notebook that Jeongguk hoped was filled with song lyrics and not poor attempts to draw Hoseok’s naked butt.
His pen had a fuzzy pink ball on the end.
“Okay!” Seokjin calls sometime later, interrupting Jimin and Hoseok as they argued whether a dance background could make someone a better Just Dance player. Jeongguk watches them from the couch, a content grin on his face. “Everyone come grab a plate.”
They each serve themselves in the kitchen, piling their plates high with food before moving to sit at the large table in the relatively small dining area. The very first time Jeongguk had visited Yoongi’s apartment- before his first full album was released and Yoongi had noticed just how anxious Jeongguk was feeling the days before- Jeongguk had wondered why Yoongi would want a table that obviously didn’t fit his available space.
Now he knew.
Dinner is a chaotic affair. Namjoon and Seokjin bounce song ideas off each other, while Taehyung chimes in with his own ideas. Hoseok talks over them to walk Jimin through their schedule for the week, while also offering to choreograph for Namjoon, Seokjin, and Taehyung’s comeback title track.
Namjoon rolls his eyes. “You know we aren’t dance focused.”
“We could be!” Taehyung replies. “Imagine how cool it would be if we came back for the first time in nearly three years and we were dancing.”
“I’m not a good dancer, Tae.” Seokjin says. “Can’t we focus on picking songs first? We have almost a hundred options.”
“Damn.” Jeongguk says around a mouthful of food. He’d never seen that many options. Sure, Jaehyun let him listen to some of the suggested music, but he’d never had the opportunity to personally pick from one hundred possible songs.
Seokjin squeezes his thigh. “We’ll discuss it later. How’s that?”
“Whatever,” Taehyung says with a shrug. Jimin places some chicken on Taehyung’s plate, only for Taehyung to put it right back on Jimin’s plate; both of them trying to encourage the other to eat more. “I think I like that r&b track for the title.”
Namjoon groans. “That would change the vibe of the whole album!”
“It’s a good song!”
The conversation quickly devolves again, both Taehyung and Namjoon trying to convince the other of their opinion. Yoongi watches fondly, his arm around the back of Jeongguk’s chair. He speaks up during a rare lull. “You could do a double album.”
Taehyung lights up.
Namjoon immediately shakes his head. “Are you trying to kill us?”
Yoongi only shrugs, smiling as he does so.
Jeongguk and Jimin lead the clean-up. Jeongguk washes the dishes as Hoseok packs up anything leftover, handing them to Jimin to dry and Taehyung to put away. When they finish, Jeongguk accepts the bowl of ice cream shoved into his hands by Seokjin, following him back to the table. Namjoon and Yoongi wander over sometime later with their own sundaes.
“Guk.” Seokjin sneaks a bite of Jeongguk’s nearly melted catastrophically mixed ice cream. “I want to ask you something.”
“Okay.” Jeongguk can’t help the uneasy feeling in his stomach. He readies himself for the worst. Namjoon and Yoongi had fallen silent on the other side of the table. In the living room, Hoseok and Taehyung were laughing at a video playing on Jimin’s phone. “Hit me.”
“Have you ever thought about being in a group?”
Huh. That was… not what Jeongguk was expecting Seokjin to ask. He picks at his ice cream, now a soupy consistency even Jeongguk wasn’t too keen on eating. “I actually trained to debut in a group first.”
Yoongi looks up. “Really?”
“Yeah.” Jeongguk pushes the last of his ice cream away, reaching over to try Seokjin’s instead. “There were nine of us. A few were cut after some last minute evaluations.”
Seokjin and Yoongi exchange a look. Yoongi asks, “What happened?”
“Same thing that always happens.” Jeongguk sits back in his chair, thinking back to those long months nearly eight years ago now. “Our debut kept getting pushed back. Some of the guys left and quickly debuted in other companies. Jaehyun told me I was holding the group back and convinced me to focus on a solo career, instead.”
Namjoon’s jaw tenses. “Did you know Jaehyun used to be in our company?”
“He did?” Jeongguk couldn’t even imagine Jaehyun working anywhere else. He’d been a part of Jeongguk’s life since his first audition, when he told Jeongguk to get a better haircut and work on his confidence.
“Yup.” Namjoon snickers. “He was initially going to be another rapper in our group, but he got kicked after we caught him stealing beats and lyrics from some of the other in-house producers. I had no idea he was still in the industry until he popped up as your manager.”
“Oh.”
“Jeongguk.” Jeongguk looks at Seokjin, tilting his head on the back of his chair. Smiling softly, Seokjin runs his fingers through Jeongguk’s hair. “Have you thought about it recently?”
“Nah.” Jeongguk sighs. “Well, I mean, yes? But no, not really.” He closes his eyes, letting Seokjin trace a finger across the bridge of his nose and cheeks. “Not only am I still in this contract for at least three years, but I’d probably just hold the other members back like Jaehyun said.”
No one speaks for a few minutes. Jeongguk eventually opens his eyes, looking around the table, but he couldn’t read the silent conversation between the others. What he could read, however, was the subtle fury on Yoongi’s face. Seokjin squeezes his shoulder.
“Hyung!” Taehyung calls from the living room. “Can we watch a movie?”
“Of course, Taehyung-ah.” Yoongi answers back.
Jeongguk stands, eager to be done with whatever weird energy had fallen over them at the table. He was happy with his career. He got to travel the world and meet fans everywhere he went. Sure, there were days on tour when he couldn’t bring himself to leave his bed and the constant fights over any artistic freedom with his music drove him mad, but what was he to do? This was the contract he signed. He was happy.
Taehyung opens his arms as he sees Jeongguk approaching, letting Jeongguk wiggle into what little space remained between Taehyung and Jimin on the couch. Yoongi sets up the movie while Seokjin and Namjoon finish cleaning up from the ice cream. Hoseok disappears for a moment and comes back with plenty of chips and other snacks.
Jeongguk doesn’t know the movie that Taehyung picks, but he doesn’t bother trying to pay attention. His focus is almost entirely on Seokjin, watching the way he falls into easy comfort while sharing an armchair with Yoongi. His profile. The curve of his lips. How he seems to anticipate everyone’s needs before they can even consider them: standing halfway through the movie to grab water, collect blankets, and clear empty bags of chips and cookies.
When the movie ends, Jeongguk knows that he should head home. His day off was nearly over, and Jaehyun was expecting him back in the studio early the next morning. Instead of following Hoseok, Taehyung, and Jimin to the elevator, Jeongguk takes Seokjin’s hand in the hallway and follows him into the waiting apartment.
Jeongguk kisses him before the door is fully shut behind them. Their clothes fall, scattered on the floor of the apartment as Seokjin guides them to the bedroom. Rumpled sheets against bare skin, Jeongguk can’t keep his mouth from Seokjin’s as Seokjin works him open; one finger, then two, adding a third despite Jeongguk assuring him that he was ready. He moans, loud and uninhibited, when Seokjin finally sinks into him, buried to the hilt as he kisses Jeongguk breathless.
They don’t stay like that for long. Jeongguk throws both legs around Seokjin’s waist, their hips working in tandem. Seokjin, knowing both what Jeongguk wants and what he needs, angles his hips to brush Jeongguk’s prostate on every thrust, his hand already snaking between their bodies to reach Jeongguk’s leaking cock.
He comes, way too quickly, but Seokjin just kisses him through it, swallowing the high-pitched moan that tumbles from Jeongguk’s lips. Seokjin keeps kissing him, their mouths wet with spit, tongues sliding together with practiced ease, until he comes, too; both breathing heavily against the other.
Seokjin’s body was a welcome weight on top of Jeongguk, he kissed Jeongguk again. “Want to stay?”
“Please.”
“You can shower first.”
Jeongguk smooths his hands up Seokjin’s bare chest, burying them in Seokjin’s hair. “Come with me?”
Seokjin leans down to kiss him with a grin. When he pulls away, Jeongguk could already feel himself chubbing up again. He takes Seokjin’s hand and follows him to the bathroom.
Jeongguk’s good mood evaporates the second he steps into the studio the next morning.
Jaehyun was waiting for him in the lobby, standing with his arms crossed. “Nice of you to show up.”
Jeongguk forces his expression into a pleasant smile. “Good morning, hyung.”
“Save it. Get upstairs.”
The studio was filled with people, and yet the silence was overwhelming. Jaehyun follows Jeongguk inside, takes his backpack, and points to the recording booth.
Shoulders tense, Jeongguk heads into the booth. He pulls the headphones over his ears and resigns himself to the meaningless lyrics waiting for him on the music stand.
“Oh, fuck. Sorry, I-” Jeongguk slaps a hand over his eyes, praying the image currently burning into his brain would eventually fade. “I’m sorry, I thought you said I could come over.”
“Relax.” Taehyung says. “We’re not even doing anything.”
Jeongguk peeks through two fingers. “Somehow I don’t believe you.”
Taehyung and Jimin were sitting up in Taehyung’s bed, a laptop on the bed between them, but their lower bodies were covered with a blanket. And Jeongguk didn’t trust the angle of JImin’s arm.
“We’re not,” Jimin insists. “Well, okay. I am holding his dick. But it’s completely clothed!”
“We’re not heathens,” Taehyung says.
“Again, I don’t believe you.”
“Plus, you’re not Yoongi.” Jimin shrugs, but he holds up both hands as a sign of surrender to Jeongguk and to prove they weren’t doing anything nefarious.
Jeongguk narrows his eyes. “What is that supposed to mean?”
“He watches sometimes.”
“Until we can convince him he can do more than watch,” Taehyung mutters. “Anyway. You sounded kinda distraught over the phone. Is everything okay?”
Jeongguk can’t help it; his shoulders drop and his face twists. He tried to hide it, covering his face with his hands, but it was already too late. Taehyung makes an unhappy noise, hurrying out of bed to pull Jeongguk into a hug, folding Jeongguk into his strong arms. They nearly trip over each other’s feet as Taehyung urges Jeongguk onto the bed so he was sitting between them.
“Oh, Jeongguk-ah.” Jiimin links their fingers together. “What is it? What’s wrong?”
“I think I have to end things with Seokjin,” Jeongguk says with a sigh. “Jaehyun says I’m too distracted and that the album is suffering as a result. And with promotions set to begin in two months, I need to be completely focused on my comeback.”
Taehyung asks, “Is your album even done?”
Jeongguk’s hands curl into fists. “Bro, it’s not even close. I saw some of the designs for the different versions today, hyung, and they’re awful.”
“You like Seokjin, right?” Jimin wraps an arm around Jeongguk’s shoulders as Taehyung quickly moves his laptop away from three bodies’ worth of moving feet.
“Of course.” Jeongguk picks at the sheets. “He’s become one of my best friends.”
Taehyung and Jimin share a look. Taehyung takes his hand, playing lightly with his fingers. “But you want to end things?”
“Yeah.” Jeongguk lets his head fall back, slipping further on the bed. “We only started having sex to find relief while we were both on the road. It’s not like we were looking for anything serious. I have to focus on my album.”
Fingers tapping a rhythm on Jeongguk’s shoulder, Jimin hums. “What does Yoongi think?”
Jeongguk shrugs. “I haven’t seen him since he finished recording his parts two weeks ago.”
“Jesus.” Taehyung lets out a bitter laugh. “Does Jaehyun keep you locked underground after everyone else leaves for the night?”
“Look.” Jeongguk flexes his fingers, itching for something to do with his hands. He had a new bag of M&Ms in his backpack… Which he’d left in the car with Donghoon. Fuck. “We both agreed to keep things casual. He’s got his own album to worry about. Speaking of.” Jeongguk rests his head on Taehyung’s shoulder. “Shouldn’t you be more worried about that album?”
“Nah. We’re all really good about knowing when we need a break. Plus, the album is in a really great place.”
“Oh.”
“Not to say they don’t get stressed,” Jimin says hurriedly. “It’s just a different music making environment, Jeongguk-ah.”
“Yeah,” Jeongguk whispers.
Jeongguk thinks back to his brief time in the same room as Taehyung and his group, comparing it to the complete silence of his own experiences. Namjoon and Yoongi would sometimes argue over one singular chord, both of them sending Taehyung or Seokjin into the booth to try different things out. Meanwhile, Jeongguk sang the lyrics presented to him and either got a thumbs-up from the mixer or a headshake from Jaehyun.
That morning, when Jeongguk tried to suggest a different lyric since he didn’t like the direction the song was going in, Jaehyun had completely ignored him. He didn’t even reject Jeongguk’s idea. He just acted like nothing had been said. When Taehyung made suggestions for their music, oftentimes Yoongi would grab a nearby guitar or mess around with his keyboard to help Taehyung put his idea into something everyone could hear.
Jeongguk stares at the ceiling. “I’ll be on tour soon, anyway. Maybe if you guys go out on the road, too, we can meet up again.”
“Jeongguk…”
He flashes his best smile at Jimin. “It’s fine, hyung. It’s not like we’re dating, or anything.”
“Right.” Jimin says slowly. “Hey, um. We were going to meet up with Yoongi. You want to come with us?”
“Nah, that’s all right. I should get back to dance practice.”
Taehyung tries to hold him down, but Jeongguk quickly wiggles his way out of the blankets and his friends. He claps his hands together. “Thanks for letting me talk about this shit, by the way. Catch you guys later?”
Jimin sighs. “Yeah. Of course.”
He’d see Jimin in the morning to record his last day as a music show MC, anyway. He wanted to keep doing it, but with his comeback looming Jeongguk wasn’t going to have the free time anymore. He throws up a peace sign and makes his way back out of Taehyung’s apartment.
Only to run right into Yoongi on the sidewalk outside, who takes one look at Jeongguk and grabs him by the wrist to drag him into a nearby restaurant.
Jeongguk doesn’t get the chance to properly end things with Seokjin.
Not for lack of trying, however.
For two weeks, Jeongguk tells himself he’ll talk to Seokjin after he finishes working, but he doesn’t finish up until long after midnight. He spends each day bouncing between the recording booth, the dance practice rooms, and now there were plenty of mornings where Jaehyun would find him arriving in the morning and either send him right back to the car or a different floor of the building to start taking concept photos.
Even when Jeongguk is allowed to leave, he’s usually so wiped out that he falls asleep on the couch in the studio or in the car on the way, so Donghoon just drives him straight to his apartment. Seokjin texts him words of encouragement that Jeongguk can’t bring himself to answer. Seeing Seokjin’s name light up the screen of his phone causes a ball of guilt to weigh heavy in his chest. Jeongguk couldn’t explain why he felt that way. He hadn’t been lying to Taehyung and Jimin when he said he and Seokjin weren’t serious. So why did the thought of telling Seokjin they needed to stop fill him with so much dread?
He knows Seokjin and the others are often in the same building, whether to record something or visit Jimin in the practice room Hoseok was fond of booking, but Jeongguk doesn’t even get a chance to visit other floors of the building.
Like tonight, while he’s sitting alone in the studio. The sound engineers had already left for the night. According to Taehyung’s Instagram story, he was three flights up in the practice room with Jimin. But Jeongguk stayed in the studio, alone on the couch and strumming absentmindedly at a guitar someone had left behind.
The door opens. Jaehyun says, “Go pack a bag.”
Jeongguk doesn’t bother looking up. “Why?”
“You’ve got a flight in a few hours.”
“Where?”
“Japan. You’ll do a few radio appearances to build hype for the album. If there’s time, you’ll film some of the music video.”
Jeongguk strums an ugly chord. “Which song did they choose for the title?”
“How the fuck would I know?”
Jeongguk resists the urge to throw the guitar out the window.
Still, he heads to the garage with Donghoon close behind. He packs enough clothes and toiletries for a week- he never knew what extra activities Jaehyun would book- and turns right back around to the car waiting on the street.
He barely registers the drive to the airport or the security checkpoints, and he’s practically sleepwalking as they leave the airport in Japan. Suddenly he’s at the hotel, falling into bed to sleep until there is a pounding at his door to wake him.
The interviews drag. Some of the journalists he spoke to asked him good questions about the album, but the whole process had been such a mess that Jeongguk didn’t really have any good answers. He tries his best, but he leaves each interview with shaking hands and dread in his stomach.
By the third day, Jeongguk has to stop at a convenience store. He wipes them out of regular M&Ms, then because he’s exhausted and in a bad mood, he grabs a limited edition flavor that looks absolutely terrible.
He rips into three bags as soon as he gets back to the hotel room, throwing on a TV show just for the noise. His phone chirps with a reminder of an unread message.
From: yoongi [6:21pm]
Meet me for dinner tonight?
To: yoongi [8:45pm]
Rain check?
I’m in japan
From: yoongi [8:48pm]
You’re what.
Jeongguk tosses his phone onto the couch and pours half a bag of M&Ms into his mouth.
He was right.
The limited edition flavor was terrible.
In the middle of a photoshoot on the fifth day, Jeongguk lets his mind wander.
Oh, he still does everything the photographer asks. He tilts his head, he shifts his weight, he smiles when he’s told to. The photographer seems pleased. Jaehyun does not.
Jeongguk wonders what his friends are up to. Were Namjoon, Seokjin, and Taehyung in the studio? Had they picked a list of songs from the ones they’d been working on? Jimin’s official social media accounts announced his solo comeback for five weeks from today, so he’d likely be practicing choreography and beginning to shoot the concept photos. Jeongguk pictured Yoongi in the studio, helping Namjoon and Taehyung find a healthy medium for their comeback.
He wonders if Taehyung and Jimin had gotten anywhere with Yoongi yet. If he realized they wanted him around as more than a friend when they spent their time off together. If Yoongi had already realized that some of the whispered words shared in the dark meant anything more-
Jeongguk sits straight up.
The photographer, a young guy with an Instagram profile that gave Jeongguk a headache when he checked it out that morning, asks Jeongguk to sit back down. He asks again, then turns to Jeongguk’s translator for help.
“Sorry.” Jeongguk bows to the array of staff around the room. “I’m sorry.”
He slumps back in the chair, his eyes unfocused.
His day off all those weeks ago.
Seokjin in bed with him, lips touching all over Jeongguk’s face.
The softly spoken words, my love.
“I think we have what we need,” the photographer says then. He smiles at Jeongguk. “Thank you very much.”
Jeongguk jumps out of his chair, hurrying to the small wardrobe room to change out of the absurd outfit he’d been wearing. Seriously. He looked like he belonged on the set of The Boys. He practically runs to the car the minute he gets confirmation of the schedule ending, ignoring Jaehyun as he calls after him. Donghoon keeps up easily.
He fumbles with his phone as soon as the hotel’s elevator doors close.
“Hello?”
“Hyung.” Jeongguk’s voice breaks on the word. “Did you mean it?”
Seokjin’s voice crackles over the line. “Jeongguk-ah. Hello-”
“Did you mean it!”
“Mean what?” Seokjin asks. “Are you okay?”
The doors open. Jeongguk jogs to his room, kicking off his shoes and dumping his backpack. “You- We… Back then- Ugh, fuck!”
“Slow down. What’s going on, baby?”
Jeongguk’s chest aches. How did he ever think he could walk away from Seokjin? He sinks onto the floor, a hand in his hair and knees to his chest. “Remember my day off? When you told me I needed a break or I’d work myself to death?”
“Ah.”
“You said… You called me-” Jeongguk exhales, breath rattling through his lungs. “You said ‘my love.’ You called me…”
“I did.”
“Did you mean it?”
“Jeongguk-ah.”
Oh, God. This was the moment Seokjin told him it had just been a slip of the tongue. Just something Seokjin said to encourage him to accept a day off. This was Seokjin’s time to break things off with him because it had gotten too real; because they both agreed on something casual but Jeongguk was too much. He was too much, Jaehyun was always saying-
“Jeongguk!”
Jeongguk blinks his eyes open. He hadn’t realized they’d closed. “Yeah?”
“Open your door.”
Frowning, Jeongguk quickly stands and unlocks his door.
“Okay… Why?”
“Fuck. Yoongi told me the fourth floor.”
“I’m on the fifth.”
“Stay there.”
“Hyung-”
“Just wait for me.”
Jeongguk swallows the lump in his throat. He listens to Seokjin’s breathing grow slightly heavier on the stairs before it evens out again, and then he could hear footsteps from the opposite end of the hall. A minute later, Seokjin appears in his doorway.
He smiles. “Hi, baby.”
Jeongguk doesn’t hesitate. He pockets his phone and throws his arms around Seokjin, pulling him into the suite at the same time he buries his face in Seokjin’s neck. He feels Seokjin wrap his arms tight around Jeongguk’s body to hold him close. Jeongguk’s shoulders shake, though he couldn’t tell if he was laughing or crying.
He pulls back. “You’re here.”
“I am.”
“How are you here?”
Seokjin brushes his thumbs across Jeongguk’s cheeks, and Jeongguk was relieved to find that he wasn’t crying. It really had been a close call. “Yoongi got your location from Donghoon.”
“You’re not Yoongi.”
“I’m not.”
Jeongguk licks his lips. “You didn’t answer my question. Did you mean it?”
Seokjin’s smile is gentle, his plush lips parted ever so slightly. Their height difference was barely noticeable, but Jeongguk felt small under Seokjin’s firm gaze. “It was… a slip of the tongue.”
Jeongguk’s heart sinks. He moves to pull away. “Oh-”
“Wait, you goof. Let me finish.” Seokjin drops his hands to Jeongguk’s shoulders, keeping him close. “When I said it that morning, yeah; it was an accident. But only because I was worried it would scare you.”
“Scare me?”
“You made it clear you weren’t looking for anything serious.” Seokjin’s smile shifts, a slight sadness in his expression. “And I was about to slip up and tell you that I loved you.”
“You-” Jeongguk is grateful to feel the edge of the armchair behind his thighs. He sits on the arm, hands still curled tight in Seokjin’s shirt; unwilling to let go and irrationally worried that if he were to let go then Seokjin would slip from his fingers. He stares up at Seokjin. “You love me?”
Seokjin stands between his legs. “I do.”
Jeongguk giggles, laughing harder and harder; aware that he was starting to sound a little insane but unable to stop. He presses his face to Seokjin’s chest, laughing against his t-shirt, just playing those words over and over in his head. Seokjin loved him. Seokjin loved him.
“What’s so funny?” Seokjin asks, eyes narrowing good-naturedly.
Barely managing to stifle his giggles, Jeongguk tips his head back to catch Seokjin’s gaze. “You almost told me you loved me and I was about to end things with you.”
“Are you kidding me?”
“No,” Jeongguk laughs again. “I told myself it was only because of my comeback and how I needed to focus on my activities. I told myself that you wouldn’t care because what we had was only casual. I was going to cut things off with you, but I literally could not get out of work at a decent hour to do it.”
Seokjin’s fingers dip below the collar of Jeongguk’s shirt, seeking warm skin. “So when we met and you said you weren’t looking for anything serious?”
“I wasn’t,” Jeongguk assures him. “But I mean, how could I not fall for you? You’re sexy as fuck, you’re so kind to me, and your dick game is exquisite.”
“Oh my God.”
“And I think…” Shoulders curling inwards, Jeongguk hesitates as he searches for the right words. Seokjin doesn’t rush him. “I think I was scared. Scared of how much I wanted you around. I wanted to be around you all the time, even though we were just casual.”
Seokjin leans in to kiss his forehead. “I’m gonna be honest, Guk. I don’t think we’ve been casual for a long time.”
“Yeah.” Jeongguk wraps his arms around Seokjin’s waist again, pressing his face to Seokjin’s chest. “I love you, too. By the way.”
“Thank goodness.”
Jeongguk lets out a heavy breath, laughing as he does so. “I can’t believe you followed me to Kyoto.”
“Honestly?” Seokjin tugs Jeongguk back to his feet, their bodies flush. “Me neither. Yoongi told me where you were and I had a change of clothes packed before I could talk myself out of it.”
“When do you go back?”
“In the morning. What about you?”
“Same.” Jeongguk shoves his hands under Seokjin’s shirt, greedy. “Unless Jaehyun surprises me with another photoshoot somewhere.”
“Hm.”
“Hyung.”
“Yes?”
“Can you kiss me already?”
“My love.” Seokjin says, the words sending a shiver down Jeongguk’s spine. “You don’t even need to ask.”
Jeongguk surges onto his toes, throwing his arms around Seokjin’s neck as their mouths meet, lips moving together desperately. Seokjin holds him close, refusing to give Jeongguk even an inch to breathe, and Jeongguk wonders if Seokjin missed him these past three and a half weeks as badly as Jeongguk had.
The kiss felt different from their previous ones. Maybe Jeongguk had been lying to himself about his feelings longer than he originally thought. He sighs into the kiss, opening his mouth for Seokjin and letting Seokjin control the pace. He doesn’t even go crazy with his hands, content just to revel in this moment; this moment with Seokjin in an unfamiliar city and the warm glow of a returned confession blooming in his stomach.
Eventually, Seokjin pulls back to breathe, and says, “Your stomach is growling.”
Jeongguk snorts. “Ah, yeah. I don’t think I ate between my schedules today.”
“You are infuriating.”
“Hey.” Jeongguk pouts. “Don’t be mean to your boyfriend.”
“Boyfriend, huh?” Seokjin grins, leaning in close. Their lips brush as he speaks. “Is that what we are?”
“Yup.” Jeongguk kisses him, shoving his tongue into Seokjin’s mouth. “No take backs.”
“Let’s get dinner.”
When Seokjin attempts to free himself from Jeongguk’s hold, Jeongguk just holds on tighter. “I… Don’t want to leave.”
“Hm?”
“I can’t hold your butt in public.”
Seokjin laughs, a loud bark that reminds Jeongguk of a squeaky windshield wiper. And he loves it. God, he’s so fucking whipped. “Okay. Grab my phone and we’ll order something.”
Laying together in bed, Jeongguk swipes through a dozen notifications from Yoongi and Taehyung on Seokjin’s phone screen to bring up the menu from one of the nearby restaurants that he liked. Seokjin flips through the TV channels to find something they both liked. Once he passes the phone back, Jeongguk rolls to curl against Seokjin’s chest. He eyes Seokjin’s t-shirt, wishing he could crawl beneath the fabric and stay there for the rest of his life.
Seokjin does leave him for a brief moment to collect their food from the delivery guy just outside the hotel doors, coming right back to the bed upon his return. They stay like that long into the evening, sitting shoulder to shoulder against the headboard as they share food and take full advantage of their time together to spend as few seconds without physical contact as possible. Jeongguk convinces him to try the terrible M&M flavor he’d gotten, and laughs until his stomach hurts when Seokjin’s face crumples with disgust.
Even when Jeongguk complains that he needs a shower, he’s unwilling to part from Seokjin. It takes very little convincing to get Seokjin to join him in the shower, hands running over exposed, wet skin. Jeongguk kisses him whenever he gets the chance- which is often, as he makes sure to always face Seokjin in the shower- until Seokjin gently pushes him away to focus on washing his hair. Jeongguk, still determined, kisses any inch of exposed skin he can before the water temperature starts to cool and Seokjin reminds him they can keep kissing outside of the shower.
Despite the near constant need to keep his hands on Seokjin’s body, they don’t do much more than kiss. Even now, both of them dressed for sleep and curled together beneath the sheets, Jeongguk is content just to press his lips to Seokjin’s mouth, his cheeks, the exposed skin of his shoulder when his shirt slips down. Seokjin holds him close, a leg thrown over his waist, swallowing each content sigh from Jeongguk’s lips.
“Hey.” Seokjin whispers later, as Jeongguk mouths sleepily against his throat. “Go to sleep, baby. I’ll be here in the morning.”
“M’kay.” Jeongguk curls his hands in whatever fabric of Seokjin’s he could. “Say it again.”
Chest rumbling softly against Jeongguk’s cheek, Seokjin presses a kiss to the top of his head. “I love you, Jeongguk-ah.”
Jeongguk thinks he says it back, but he doesn’t worry about it. He can say it all he wants now.
Standing before the private exit of Incheon Airport, Seokjin places his hand on Jeongguk’s shoulder. They stand to the side, letting a group leave before them. Jeongguk faces him, searching for Seokjin’s eyes behind his dark sunglasses.
“I don’t want you to freak out.”
Jeongguk frowns. “What’s wrong?”
“Nothing.” Seokjin squeezes his shoulder. “We’re meeting Yoongi.”
“I have to be in the studio.”
“Yeah.” Seokjin hikes his backpack further on his shoulders. “We’ll get to that.”
Jeongguk’s schedule in Japan hadn’t been made public, so they probably didn’t need to take the private exit, but Jeongguk is still glad they did. Donghoon leads them to the pick-up area in the parking lot and to a sleek black car waiting there. They hit morning traffic. Donghoon consistently looks back at them through the rearview mirror. Next to Jeongguk, Seokjin’s fingers fly rapidly over his phone’s keyboard.
In the lobby of the building, Yoongi waits with crossed arms.
“You’re late.”
“I cannot control Seoul’s traffic,” Seokjin says with an eyeroll.
“Hyung?” Jeongguk follows them to the elevator. “What’s going on?”
Seokjin offers him a reassuring smile. “Everything is fine. Just keep that in mind.”
Jeongguk felt a little like he was being led to an execution, the way Donghoon follows silently behind them while Yoongi and Seokjin lead him down a hallway on the fifth floor, their heads turned in quiet conversation. Well, if he was going to die today, at least he got to tell Seokjin how he felt. He trusted Taehyung to put the proper quote on his tombstone. Here lies Jeon Jeongguk. Died doing what he loved: staring at Seokjin’s ass while he walked.
“Jeongguk.” Yoongi touches his wrist. “Do you trust me?”
“Of course.”
“Good. Come on.”
Pushing open a door Jeongguk vaguely recognizes, Yoongi leads their group into a room. The room was filled almost entirely with a large conference table in the center, a smaller table in the corner piled high with untouched pastries and coffee, and extra chairs stacked in the opposite corner. Jeongguk immediately spots Jaehyun sitting in the center chair on one side of the conference table. On either side of Jeongguk’s manager sat executives, some producers, and managers Jeongguk usually only saw when there was an issue with one of his performances.
His shoulders slump, and Jeongguk quickly turns to try and makes his way back to the hallway, but Yoongi catches him by the wrist and all but drags him further into the room. Hand held firmly on Jeongguk’s shoulder, Yoongi pushes Jeongguk into the seat across from Jaehyun. Seokjin sits on his left, and Jeongguk watches as Namjoon files into the room between a few lawyers and Jeongguk’s main choreographer.
Everyone sits, tense and silent.
Jaehyun breaks the silence. “What the fuck is this, Min? We have a deadline.”
“You don’t, actually.” Yoongi fishes several manila folders from his briefcase. “Jeongguk is leaving.”
“I am?” Jeongguk asks, at the same time Jaehyun laughs cruelly.
“Ah, we needed some good April Fool’s fun, Yoongi.” Jaehyun says. “Let’s go, Jeongguk.”
Jaehyun stands, then slowly sinks back down when no one follows suit.
Jeongguk’s hands were shaking. He tries to hide it by shoving his hands beneath his thighs, his head spinning as Jaehyun accuses Yoongi of tampering and treason and distracting Jeongguk from his responsibilities as a singer. He feels a hand on his thigh, looks down and sees Seokjin offering a fun size pack of M&Ms.
He lets out a quiet breath, a vice loosening around his chest. Jeongguk doesn’t open the pack right away, but is grateful to have something to keep his hands busy.
“We’re behind schedule,” Jaehyun was yelling.
Yoongi replies, calmly. “Is that why you’ve been taking Jeongguk out of the country for radio shows and photoshoots that either never make it to publication or the fee never makes its way to Jeongguk?”
Jeongguk’s head whips to the side. “What?”
For a moment, Jaehyun’s facade seems to crack. He slams his hand on the table. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“No?” Yoongi flips open several of his folders, sliding papers across the table. Each man sitting on the other side takes one cautiously, as if the paper would burn them. “Allow me to jog your memory. Five times over the last three months, you sent Jeongguk for a photoshoot that was not originally a part of his schedule. Two of those never made it to publication. Now, you may argue that sometimes happens, as over the course of the past ten years a handful of Jeongguk’s magazine photoshoots fell through.”
“So?” Jaehyun flicks a paper back to Yoongi. “Some magazines didn’t want to publish Jeongguk’s face. What’s your fucking point?”
Jeongguk curls his hand into a fist, nails biting the skin of his palm.
“My point,” Yoongi says. “Is that even if a magazine decides not to go forward with publication, Jeongguk still receives his fee. For the past year, Lee Jaehyun has been funneling that fee into his own accounts.”
The room falls into tense silence.
Jaehyun tries to laugh. “Shouldn’t we all be concerned how Yoongi has access to Jeongguk’s finances?”
Yoongi digs through another folder for more papers. “It was his parents, actually, who alerted me to the discrepancies with his account.”
For the first time, Jaehyun started to look genuinely worried. He sits back in his chair, looking at the executives seated on either side of him. “Oh, come on. Jeongguk is a grown ass adult, with his own bank accounts-”
“He was barely thirteen when he signed with this company,” Yoongi says sternly. “Everything required his parents’ consent. Right, Jeongguk?”
Jeongguk swallows. “When I became an adult,” he said slowly. “My mom suggested keeping the account combined, just in case. I was supposed to separate them after I finished my military service six years ago, but… Yeah. A few of my income sources still go to that account.”
“And that’s not all,” Seokjin interjects. “Please continue, Yoongi.”
Yoongi does. “There are several people willing to testify how Jaehyun has spent over a year working Jeongguk to the point of sickness and injury. And I’m sure you know the security cameras would show just how many times Jaehyun refused to let Jeongguk leave the building, even when it’s the middle of the night or he’s not rushing to meet a deadline.”
“Fuck you, Min.” Jaehyun spits.
“There is clear evidence of multiple contract violations,” Yoongi continues without missing a beat. “If Jeongguk agrees to it, my lawyers will present a formal contract termination request. Or, if need be, we would be happy to take this to court.”
“I don’t think that would be necessary,” one of the executives says quickly. “I think we can reach a healthy middle ground. What do you say, Jeongguk?”
What did he say? He’s spent the last few years convincing anyone who asked that he was happy and content with his company, that he didn’t mind Jaehyun’s abrasive behavior or the intense hours and multiple holidays without even finding the time for a phone call with his family. He’d told himself he was happy, but maybe he’d just been scared of losing what he had. The ability to see his fans; to release music and tour the world.
He’s spent years waving away people’s concern, thinking the way Jaehyun spoke to him was normal. Thinking the insane schedule was normal. Then he got a taste of how it felt to make music with people who cared. Yoongi and Namjoon, and Seokjin who had recently been there when the world felt like it would crush Jeongguk.
He said…
“Think hard about what you say next, Jeongguk.” Jaehyun says coldly. “Where are you going to go? You’re almost thirty. You think any company is going to be stupid enough to give you a chance?”
Namjoon clears his throat. “Multiple companies have been reaching out to him for years. You’ve just withheld all the communication you could.”
“Doesn’t mean anyone will want his pathetic ass.”
Jeongguk tilts his head, staring at the man seated across from him. The man he’d met back when he was thirteen, who was introduced to him as the manager who would ensure Jeongguk’s physical and mental condition as well as his entertainment schedule. Instead, he’d spent almost a decade and a half demeaning Jeongguk; telling him he would be nothing in any other company, that he should give up on his goal of debuting in a group because the other members wouldn’t want him.
Jeongguk crosses his arms, sitting up straighter. “Yoongi,” he says without breaking eye contact. “How quickly can your lawyers draft those articles of termination?”
“We have them ready.”
“Jeongguk, please.” The same executive who previously spoke extends a hand. “We can figure this out. We’ll fire Jaehyun-”
“What!”
“No.” Jeongguk says. “You’ll sign these papers. I know you don’t want this to go to court.”
The man’s eyebrows disappear behind his shoddy haircut. “What makes you think we won’t fight to keep you?”
A smile finds its way to Jeongguk’s lips. “I’m your only active idol,” Jeongguk says. “We take this to court and I’ll take everything.” He looks around the table, at the men sitting across from him; the executives who’d lured him in as a teenager. The men who convinced him, barely thirteen and with no experience to compare it with, to sign a contract with his parents waiting outside. “But,” Jeongguk continues. “If you let me out right now, I won’t tell anyone what led to this. We can draft a statement that says we separated on good terms and that there are no hard feelings. What do you say?”
He throws the question back at them.
Another executive, one Jeongguk barely remembered seeing in the hallways after his first few albums under performed, tilts his head to speak quietly with another guy. Then he turns to speak to the man sitting on his other side, his hand held in front of his mouth to hide what they were saying. Eventually, he sits back with a sigh.
“The company would like to avoid taking this to court.”
Jeongguk lets out a heavy breath, feeling the noose loosen. “Okay.” He feels Seokjin squeeze his knee. “Good.”
Yoongi springs into action. He stands, collecting a dozen packets and passing them around the table. One lands in front of Jeongguk. He flips through it, and is relieved when nothing crazy catches his eye. One of the lawyers stands, rounding the table slowly.
“Jeongguk-ssi,” the lawyer finally says. “When you’re ready, go ahead and sign on the dotted lines.”
Seokjin hands him a pen with a tiny duck for a cap.
Grinning, Jeongguk quickly flips through the packet of papers and signs and initials everywhere he’s prompted to do so. His heart was beating rapidly, threatening to jump right out of his chest, but his hand did not falter. He quickly signs everywhere he needs to, capping the pen and passing the papers to the lawyer.
The man then slams the packet down in front of the CEO, standing over the guy’s shoulder as he slowly provides his initials and signature on the same pages Jeongguk had previously signed. The two men on his left, including the executive who’d initially tried to get Jeongguk to stay, slowly followed suit.
“Thank you.” The lawyer snatches the papers back and then drops them in front of a man Jeongguk hadn’t noticed at first.
The man looks over each page and nods once. Then he proceeds to take out a stamp and notarize each page that had been signed.
The lawyer collects the packet. “You each have a physical copy of the terms to keep with you. Once the official version is filed, you will receive confirmation via your email addresses on file. Thank you all for your cooperation, and goodbye.”
Without another word, the lawyer leaves.
“Damn.” Jeongguk whispers, leaning in to speak quietly to Yoongi. “It seemed like he wanted to be here even less than I did.”
“His son was signed here,” Yoongi whispers back. “With all the papers he’s had to serve to the corporate executives here over the years, I believe he’s starting to lose his patience.”
“Well, Jeongguk.” The first executive stands, his face a careful blank mask. “We’ll draft a statement and send it to your team for approval.”
“Right, um.” Jeongguk hurries to stand, too. People start filing out of the room. He reaches to shake the executive’s hand. “Thank you.”
Jaehyun looks like he means to say something, leaning forward in his chair with a vile expression twisting his features, but another guy grabs him by the arm and all but drags him out of the room without another word. Jeongguk watches, speechless.
Seokjin touches his wrist. “Want to get out of here?”
“Please.”
They wait until the room clears. Yoongi shakes hands with the notary and speaks briefly with the remaining two lawyers that he’d brought along to the meeting. Then they follow Namjoon out of the room and to the elevator. It doesn’t quite hit Jeongguk until Seokjin gently guides him into Yoongi’s personal studio and he sinks to the floor, holding his head in his hands.
“What did I just do?”
Seokjin joins him on the floor, legs around Jeongguk’s body, but he was careful not to touch him, giving Jeongguk the space to think through the last hour of his life. “You terminated your contract.”
“Oh my God.” Jeongguk leans into Seokjin’s arms, crossing his own atop his knees. “I have to…” He needs to clear out his locker. He needs to call his parents. Shit, he had a whole album that was supposed to be released in four weeks. And he was just going to walk away from this life? “What do I do now?”
“Anything you want,” Yoongi says. He sits cross-legged on the floor across from Jeongguk. “My legal team is on retainer for you as long as we need them, and I can speak with them about making sure you get the rights to the songs you’ve been working on for your next album.”
Jeongguk chews on his bottom lip. “And if I don’t want those songs?”
Smiling gently, Yoongi reaches out to squeeze Jeongguk’s wrist. “I happen to know a lot of really good songwriters who’d kill to write for your register.”
Namjoon clears his throat. He sits in Yoongi’s office chair, fishing out a stack of business cards from his pocket. “I wasn’t lying in there when I said you’ve caught the eye of a lot of entertainment companies. Hell, I’m pretty sure our company would drop everything just for a chance to get you.”
His cheeks feel warm. He nudges Yoongi with his foot. “Jaehyun is going to kill you.”
“He is not a concern,” Yoongi says. “My contractual obligation to that company begins and ends with your need for a guitarist. We never have to see him again.”
Seokjin kisses his temple. “You can do whatever you want, baby.”
“Well.” Jeongguk tips his head back, staring at the ceiling. “It was always my dream to be in a group.”
The door slams open, revealing Taehyung, Jimin, and Hoseok all squeezed into the doorway. Taehyung glances around the room. “Is it over?”
“The termination papers will need to be filed with the courts,” Yoongi says. “But yes. For all intents and purposes, it’s over.”
“Thank fucking God.” Taehyung rushes into the room, dropping to his knees to pull Jeongguk into a crushing hug. Jeongguk just laughs, holding on tightly as Jimin and Hoseok join the pile, too. Taehyung slowly pulls back. “So what now?”
“First,” Jeongguk says. “Seokjin is going to take me to a very expensive restaurant for our first date.”
“I am?”
“You are. Keep up, hyung.” Jeongguk’s legs were starting to fall asleep under the pile of limbs currently hugging him. “Then, we are going back to his place to have a ton of sex. I’ll figure out my career after that.”
Hoseok groans, fighting his way out of the group hug. “No one wanted to hear that.”
“Speak for yourself,” Taehyung shoots back.
“Don’t take too long,” Yoongi says as everyone stands. Namjoon and Taehyung make their way to the couch to look over some lyrics. Jimin follows, arms and legs wrapped around Taehyung. “We’ll have a big dinner tonight to celebrate.”
Taehyung calls over his shoulder, “And if you want an audience later…”
Grinning, Jeongguk pauses in the doorway, fingers linked with Seokjin’s. “By the way, Yoongi. Taehyung and Jimin like you as more than just a friend. Okay, bye!”
The door shuts behind them, cutting off Taehyung’s agonized scream and Hoseok’s loud laughter. Jeongguk is still smiling to himself all the way to the elevator and to the parking garage under the building. He knew, deep down, that he’d be back. But he also knew that when he returned, it wouldn’t be to the floor rented by Jaehyun and the company, and that thought bloomed warm and comforting in Jeongguk’s chest.
Seokjin squeezes his hand. “So… lunch?”
“And a lot of sex,” Jeongguk reminds him. “Don’t forget about that.”
“I could never.”
Jeongguk fishes the small bag of M&Ms out of his pocket. Using his teeth, he rips open one corner and then pours half the bag into his mouth. He passes the rest to Seokjin, who does the same, and with clasped hands and sure steps, Jeongguk follows Seokjin into his future.
[one year later]
Jeongguk sits on the floor of his dressing room, legs crossed and eyes shut as he lets the sounds of screams and fanchants wash over him through the speaker mounted on the wall. His lips relax in an easy smile, chest aching with anticipation.
The news of his departure one year earlier had stayed atop the news headlines for weeks. True to Jeongguk’s promise- and only because his company hadn’t dragged him to court- Jeongguk didn’t say a single word to anybody about the real reason he left. The statement was generic, and though his fans and entertainment insiders had their own theories about what had happened, no one squealed.
Jaehyun was fired, and though they didn’t go to court over the terms of Jeongguk’s contract termination, they had spent months fighting over the rights to Jeongguk’s music. There wasn’t much of it that Jeongguk wanted, but his ex-company was determined to maintain the rights and royalties for the few songs he did want to be able to sing. When they finally reached a settlement, Jeongguk was left with a dozen songs he could keep. The rest, for all he cared, could be trashed forever.
While the news of Jeongguk leaving his company and cancelling his upcoming album had been huge, the headlines that followed four months later had been monumental.
The news that Jeon Jeongguk, known for being a soloist, would be joining a group.
The timing had worked out that Jeongguk could contribute to Namjoon, Seokjin, and Taehyung’s album before it was released, and he’d nearly cried the first afternoon he’d been in the studio with them. Writing music with them. Taking turns in the booth and then going in altogether to nail down the harmonies. And the music was so much better. With his groupmates at his side, Jeongguk no longer dreaded walking into the company building every morning.
And now, sitting in the dressing room before their first concert together- an opening show in Seoul in the biggest venue Jeongguk had ever performed in- Jeongguk knew that he’d never regret his decision. The album had been well-received. They’d all be on tour together, singing songs they all had a hand in making and dancing choreography created by Hoseok, for at least a year. And Jeongguk couldn’t be more excited.
A soft knock sounds at his door, and a moment later Seokjin pokes his head in. “It’s time, baby.”
“Okay.” Jeongguk stands, stretching his arms over his head. He meets Seokjin in the doorway, kissing him quickly. “I don’t remember the last time I was so excited to perform.”
They make their way down the hallway, the roar of the fans growing louder with each step.
Seokjin squeezes his hand. “Hoseok and Jimin are in the audience.”
“Yeah?” Jeongguk grins. They pause to collect their mics and ear-pieces, thanking the staff who wish them a good show. “And Yoongi?”
“He’s in the pit with the rest of the band. And before you ask: yes, he is wearing the necklace Taehyung and Jimin gave him.”
Jeongguk grins. “Good.”
They approach Taehyung and Namjoon, taking their positions on the lift that would bring them to stage. From here, the cheers were deafening; Jeongguk’s name thrown into the fanchant order like it was always meant to be there.
Jeongguk stands between Taehyung and Seokjin, passing his mic between his hands. He looks at his bandmates, catching Taehyung’s hand when he offers it.
“Ready?” Taehyung shouts over the roar of the crowd.
“Ready.”
The platform lifts to a myriad of flashing lights and a crescendo of screams. Jeongguk falls into the easy choreography, bringing the microphone to his lips, and he sings.