Work Text:
The Stars
Shining above me,
Millions of small sparkles,
Like angels Angels in the sky.
Crunch.
"Ugh!" Hosuh groaned, his voice echoing slightly through the dark field he sat in. The scrunched paper of his poem was tossed away behind him, only stopping when it hit the pile of his past attempts. Stress and pressure weighed in the man's chest as he ripped another page from his exercise book.
Although his mind was set to one simple task, Hosuh struggled to complete it, like always. He constantly found himself behind in English class, distracted by his doodles or peers, never focused enough to learn anything.
With a deep breath, Hosuh pressed the tip of his pen to the flimsy paper that he leant against his book. He pushed aside the heavy, frustrating thoughts, ready to try again for what felt like the millionth time...
Night Time Wind
... but found himself almost immediately restarting.
It was the most basic assignment: write a haiku about anything you see or feel.
It wasn't even graded.
Why did he have to overthink it so fucking much?
Slamming the paper and pen onto the grassy surface below, Hosuh stood up, before almost instantly sitting back down.
He positioned himself cross-legged, with his head in his hands, trying to breath steadily.
It had happened hundreds of times before, where Hosuh's head felt heavy, his heart empty. And his chest in pain. Tears threatened to drop down his cheeks.
Don't cry. You're better than this.
Dont cry don't cry don't cry don't cry don't-
"Hos?"
A familiar voice called out to the now trembling male, and he turned around to face the source.
It was Stephen, Hosuh's best friend. He always saved him.
"Stephen... what brings you here?"
The silver-haired one asked, his voice mildly shaky. A cold breeze pressed against his body as Hosuh waited for a response, but no words came.
"Stephen...?"
Anxiety caught the older in its web when Hosuh still lacked a reply, the only form of acknowledgement being Stephen's pitiful eyes examining Hosuh's state.
Suddenly, the silence was broken as Hosuh was pulled into a tight hug, feeling warm arms wrap around his waist. Barely audible words were mumbled into his ear,
"Don't let go, you're okay now, I'm here."
Hosuh listened, bringing his arms around Stephen, and resting his head on the other's shoulder. Their torsos were pressed together and could feel one another's breathing. The atmosphere was just as splendid as ever, serene and merry emotions slowly coming back to Hosuh.
After a while, the pain had completely left him, replaced by warmth and comfort, with something else lingering behind it. Fingers had found their way into his long silver hair, playing with it, and the birds had finally gone to sleep, leaving only the wind's soft brush in the leaves and grass to be heard.
"Thank you," Hosuh whispered, pulling away from Stephen's grasp, "What would I do without you, Steph?" The older smiled tenderly.
"Hm, fail English, probably." The purple-haired boy replied, and the other chuckled.
"Now, what do you need help with? Are you still stuck on the poem?"
"Actually, can we just stargaze together? It's not due until Monday."
"Of course, Hos."
Stephen sat down on the grass, and Hosuh followed, moving his things to be behind him. The conversation didn't continue, but in the end, neither boy minded as they stared off into the starry night sky.
The moon glowed overhead, and the world's worries seemed to evaporate in the moment, each boy simply enjoying the other's presence, the calming quiet, and satisfyingly gentle aura of the night.
Despite the astonishing peace, something still ached inside of Hosuh, a feeling he still couldn't name. It brought him happiness, warmth, joy, and... felt like home.
It wasn't a new feeling, either, it had existed inside of him for so long, perhaps about when he met Stephen five years ago. Hosuh loved the emotion, even though it was so rarely felt, he longed for more. It brought butterflies to his stomach, warmth to his cheeks, and set his heart aglow.
But, the strangest; and somehow simplest; part was what brought the feeling.
It wasn't drawing, sports, music, the air, his family, or anything else...
Except his best friend.
Each time they spoke, met up, looked into each other's eyes, admiration and cosiness filled Hosuh's heart. It even weighed him down sometimes, as the anxiety had done earlier.
It all matched perfectly with one myth he had heard far too often, and Hosuh had forced himself to laugh it off every time.
He had dismissed it as admiration.
Yet here, under the night sky, with only his best friend and the tender emotions in his heart, realisation and honesty sank into his chest.
It was-
"Hello? Earth to Hosuh Lee!"
Stephen's voice snapped Hosuh back into reality, the man flinching in surprise, eyes widening.
"You're finally done day dreaming, Hos, I've been trying to wake you up for at least fifteen minutes!"
The taller man threw his arm over the shorter's shoulders, chuckling. Hosuh just smiled nervously, feeling his face heat up.
But I can't be in-
"Hos? You okay?" Stephen asked, facing Hosuh. His eyes were flooded with concern, making the sudden rush of fluster in his best friend increase.
"I'm fine, thank you-"
"Did I do something?"
"No! No, I promise, I'm just really tired!"
Hosuh hurried to say, packing his books, scraps, and pens into his bag.
"I need some rest, sorry, goodnight!"
The man flung his bag over his shoulder, rushing off in a flurry of emotions, leaving Stephen alone in the dark.
I'm sorry, Stephen, but I'm in love with you, and I don't think I can accept it.
Or at least...
Not yet.