Work Text:
Work finally concluded for the solar cycle.
Orion Pax could not wait to be out of the stuffy, cramped caverns. He felt like this most of the time after shifts in the mines, but today? It was... particularly intense.
He wasn't sure whether it was due to a poor recharge cycle, the gnawing feeling in his chassis, or something in the air. He needed to leave.
Elita-1's harsh comments about his less-than-stellar arrival time and lethargic performance shouldn't have hit him that hard. And yet, they did. She knew how to tear a bot a new one.
Orion's mind was near static throughout the ascent and dropping his equipment off at the depot. He knew he was in his cohort but the white noise in his processor seemed to drown out all the activity around him.
The gnawing in his chassis grew into a worrying pulse in his spark.
Suddenly, there was too much noise. Too many bots around. Too loud...!
Go to the roof, his processor faintly told him.
As soon as he dropped off his jetpack, he began to make a beeline toward the roof. He didn't care if anyone else saw him—
"Pax?"
Some mech's vocalizer sliced through the grating noise.
"D... Dee...?" he croaked, static tightening his speech.
Orion detected a servo hovering over his left shoulder pauldron. He didn't have the energy to turn around, but he knew it was D-16. That voice was unmistakable.
"Something up, Pax?" his best friend's vocalizer sounded in his audials again. There was a hint of concern.
Orion swallowed, neck cabling tensing. Words did not come easy to him at the moment.
"I'll... be on the roof." He had to force it out. It hurt.
He didn't wait for a response from his friend. He found the door to the roof, fumbled with picking the handle's lock, and rushed through once it was open. He didn't know if he fully closed it behind him.
The outside air of Iacon City hit his faceplate. He found refuge by a vent shaft, nearly collapsing beneath it as he curled himself into the tightest ball he could manage.
Here, it was quiet enough that the static in his processor drowned everything else out. But would that help? Hearing his thoughts louder than the evening ambience of Iacon?
No. Even with shutting the world out in his mind, his thoughts almost multiplied, static persistent. It played back all the sharp words, sideways sneers, and suspicious glares from that day. He could feel his chassis tighten, his servo joints tense. His spark surged and he found himself breathless for a moment.
Too loud...! Still too loud, too much noise...! Too much, too much, too—
"-ax! Orion! Pax, can you hear me...?!"
D-16...!
Orion struggled through the static, but he focused on his friend's firm-yet-soft vocalizer. He lifted a digit off his leg armor, barely, to signal that he could hear him.
"Thank Primus..." He heard Dee sigh, heard him shifting closer. "Can you look at me...?"
Slowly, cautiously, he peered over his knees, focusing his optics on his friend. Amber-colored optics gazed intently back at him.
"There you are, Orion..." His friend's vocalizer shifted to a fond, warm tone– one he liked very much. Dee continued. "I'm here. Just focus on me."
Orion did. He felt a gentle tap near his own digits, on his leg armor. Saw Dee's servo. Slowly, slowly tapped back, inching his digits over Dee's. Wanted touch but didn't want to be overwhelmed by it.
Dee's digits soon did the same. Gently, carefully slotted themselves between his. No words needed to be said. The warmth of his best friend's servo communicated all that was necessary.
After a beat or two, Orion's neck cabling and chassis relaxed. He wasn't fully better, but it was a start.
"Th... Thank you..." he croaked out. His vocalizer hitched slightly.
"Hey, no problem, Pax." Dee's volume remained soft– loud enough to hear, but quiet enough to not overload his audial suite. A delicate balance his friend mastered around him for moments like these.
Orion sighed a shaky sigh. "S-Sorry, I-"
"Hey." A soft interruption from Dee. Firm, but gentle. "You're going through a lot, Orion... I can tell. You don't have to talk about it. I won't make you. Don't force yourself to speak if it's hard... okay?"
He swallowed, absorbing his best friend's words. Nodding in return as thanks for reading the room. Words were hard right now, even with the static in his processor fading away.
"Okay." Dee flashed a small smile at him. Gingerly gave his servo a squeeze. "Is it alright if I touch your shoulder?"
Orion responded with a quiet, approving vocalizer trill. He usually did this if he couldn't bring himself to talk. Beeps, trills, purrs, rumbles. Something vaguely vocal that only Dee understood.
Barely-there taps began on his right shoulder pauldron. Soon, it became a light massage from Dee's thumb digit that traced circles on said pauldron. Orion faintly leaned into it. Purred softly at the consideration in Dee's touch. Felt his shoulders sag a little more with each rotation of Dee's thumb digit.
He heard Dee chuckle softly through his olfactory ridge and shivered a bit.
"Primus... this really does relax you, huh?" The fondness didn't leave his vocalizer.
Orion responded with an affirmative, soft beep. Dee chuckled again.
"I'm gonna move my other servo to your other pauldron, okay?" His friend was always so considerate in situations like this.
Orion faintly whined at the touch leaving his knee joint, but the purrs resumed when he registered circles being traced on his left pauldron. It felt like his whole frame would go limp at any moment. And if it did... he trusted Dee to catch him.
He did collapse, but slowly. Let his helm find shelter in Dee's neck cabling. Frame relaxed and loose.
Soon, Dee's arms gently enveloped him. Provided a soft, firm pressure on his back plates.
Orion's spark surged. Purring turned into stressed in-vents and ex-vents. He shuttered his optics tight and buried his helmet in Dee's neck cabling further.
Why did the anxiety return? It's not like he was bothered by Dee embracing him, but...
Everything felt like too much again. Almost suffocating. Sure, his thoughts and head were quieter, but his frame reacted the same way as when it was loud. Why—?
Dee must've noticed the change. Because a nanoklik later, there was a soft whisper in Orion's audials.
"Shhh... I'm right here, Pax. It's okay. I've got you. I'm here..."
Very, very slowly... he relaxed again. He followed Dee's steady breaths, leaned into his whispers, focused on his voice. Trilled a bit against his friend's neck cabling. Smiled at hearing a gentle chuckle rumble through Dee's chassis.
"Heh... I can tell you've really needed this after today, Orion. Wanted it, even." The smile in his vocal processor was unmistakable.
Of course Orion wanted the close contact, the soft touches from Dee. It was relieving, relaxing to know that somebot cared enough to stay with him after a long, rough day. The gentility of it all sent a pleasant, tingly feeling up his spinal strut.
But did he deserve it? All of it?
Doubt took a foothold in his processor. He tried to shake it away, but it wouldn't leave him alone. It whispered. Harshly. That Dee was only doing this out of pity. That he didn't truly care about him. He didn't really deserve this affection. He had to earn it. Just like he had to earn everyone's trust in the cohort. He was sure everyone hated him. He—
"Pax. Pax?"
Dee...
"Orion...! Orion, deep breaths." The rumble of Dee's vocalizer shook him out of his processor once more. His frame had tensed up again. His breathing was shallow...
In... and out... follow Dee's breathing...
"Shhh... I'm here. I've got you, Pax. I'm staying right here until you're better." A pause, maybe to think? Then Orion heard Dee continue: "Whatever's going on in that processor of yours– I don't hate you, alright? I... I care about you, Orion. What kind of friend would I be if I left you when you needed me the most?"
Orion felt his frame slowly relax again. He tuned his audials to listen to Dee more clearly.
"I know it's been hard today, Pax. Sometimes there'll be solar cycles like that. I get it. Again, you don't have to talk about it. But... I want to stay with you during the storm, and after it passes, okay? I'll hold you for as long as I need to."
A weight tumbled off of Orion's chassis. His frame greatly relaxed. Still couldn't bring himself to say anything. But soon found safety in Dee's neck cabling again. Purred softly against it, relishing in the warmth.
He was safe. It was warm. Dee wasn't going anywhere. That's all he needed to know to dispel his doubts.
"I've got you, Orion. Always. No matter what." Dee declared, softly, with a genuine weight behind it.
That was the last thing Orion heard before slipping into a serene recharge.