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Summary:

As their former Sensei, Kakashi is seen as the defacto clan head of Sasuke and Naruto, given that they have that title themselves.
He didn't mind, what he does mind is civilian families offering a daughter or a sister up to marry the last Uzumaki and the last Uchiha, while they already are happy with Sakura.
So, he offers a solution to say fuck off in the best way he can.

Notes:

(See the end of the work for notes.)

Work Text:

It felt odd.

All three of them being in Konoha once more, not just that either. The war had been fought and won, Sasuke was back in Konoha for good and had been reinstated as a Shinobi of Konoha after a probation period. He was now, finally, a jounin and in ANBU (although they shouldn’t be able to tell that last part).

Sakura had stayed at Tsunade’s side during the overhaul of the hospital. Especially as Kakashi had taken over as Hokage after the war leaving the Slug Princess to concern herself with other matters. Such as the hospital which now had several classes for Academy Students to at least have some basic training and it was working. To the point that Suna and Taki were sending academy students to Konoha for a couple of months in an exchange program to be able to learn the same.

To the surprise of no one Naruto was currently the Hokage Kandidate. Kakashi had mentioned as he took the hat that it would be to keep the seat warm and not to actually be it until he died. He was already taking Naruto with him almost everywhere he went and was slowly giving tasks to the blond to take over.

What did feel odd, for all of them and for Konoha, was the fact that after all three of them stayed in Konoha and they had a chance to talk that wasn’t in the middle of a warzone they got through a lot of the issues that had been accumulating over the years. To the point they could start anew, forgiven even if it wasn’t forgotten. Together where it counted.

Together in every sense of the word too, once they had that chance. Something that some people saw coming from miles away, while others did not know what to do about it, not knowing what to think about it either. Not that either of them cared, there had been a connection for the longest time and this seemed like the next logical step.

Regardless, they were all in Naruto’s new apartment. The one he had been given after they returned from the way and it became clear that he’d been crashing in Kakashi’s spare bedroom as his original apartment hadn’t survived Pain. Given everything going on, he hadn’t really cared either and this seemed like a good solution at the time.

Most people also knew this is where they often spent the night, so the knocking on the door shouldn’t be a surprise.

Yet, none of them wanted to get up. Sasuke had been on a night shift and had managed maybe three hours of sleep. Sakura had been out until late as well, a surgery that had gone over time and made her come home past midnight. Naruto had been the only one to actually sleep at a decent hour, so he was the one to get out, even if his lovers groaned as their heatsource left.

“Yeah, yeah, I’ll be right back”, he uttered as he pulled on the first pair of pants he found and made his way to the front door. Opening it to see Tenzo standing there with a sheepish smile, “Sorry, Naruto, Hokage-sama asks for your presence. All of your presence.”

The two still in the bed moan in disappointment, before reluctantly leaving the bed and getting ready. Sasuke still with his eyes closed and Sakura grumbling on how she’d make sure Hokage-Sama knew how displeased she was.

Nodding at Tenzo, Naruto grinned before closing the door and following his lovers to the bathroom to get ready as well.

He’s the first one out of the bathroom too, tidying the bed and making sure they are ready to leave on the off chance there is a mission waiting for them once they arrive at Kakashi’s office. Chances were slim, but never impossible and Kakashi sending Tenzo to come and get them made it seem that it was big enough for him to send someone they know.

Once out of the door, Naruto hums, “I wonder what this is about, Sensei didn’t mention anything yesterday so it has to be a recent development.”

Sasuke and Sakura, still not fully awake, grumble, “I wish he would have waited a couple more hours to come and get us.”

The sun is high in the sky however, so it’s already close to noon going by that alone. Kakashi had been generous, and the longer they took to walk to the administrative office, the more Naruto felt something heavy settle in his stomach. Kurama was restless too, even if his friend didn’t state as much.

Opening the door to Kakashi’s office as soon as they arrived, the silver haired man looked a little lost. Mentioning for them to take a seat before he’s wiping some blood over a seal under his desk to activate a privacy seal.

“Sorry for calling on you after the night two of you had”, he smiles, but it doesn’t reach his eyes. Something is obviously wrong, and it’s putting them on edge.

Frowning, Sasuke leans forward, “What’s going on?”

Their former teacher sighs, “It appears that people are realizing that my successor and my future head of ANBU are unattached and seem to find it interesting to offer the hand of either a daughter or a sister in marriage to either man. Several offers have come in, mostly from families from Hi no Kuni, but I got one from Suna, Taki and Ame today as well.”

Blinking once, Sakura is the one getting on her feet, “Say what now? They are asking you if they can marry Naruto or Sasuke?”

Nodding Kakashi explains that with either not having immediate family, unless one counts Tsunade in Naruto's case he’s the de facto guardian for both of them. Even if they are both adults, and have been for years, such a proposal would normally go through the Clan Head, but as both of them are Clan Head this isn’t possible in this scenario. “So those letters come to me, and I’m glad they did as I have every intention of rejecting such offers.”

His eyes are kind as he looks at his students, “All three of you have come too far in so many ways for me to just fuck that up. Not only that but all of the proposals have come from civilian families and none of those would be able to keep up with you.”

Turning to Sakura, he adds, “Non-Shinabo civilians at that, Sakura-chan. I know where you hail, but you more than showed the world that you are on equal footing to the two of them.”

Naruto tilts his head to the side, “Why now? I mean all of us are 18, but other than that, what makes them decide to act on this now?”

“The world is healing, and the prowess of both of you wasn't unnoticed during the war, Naruto. On top of that, between you keeping your connection to the Bijuu and Sasuke’s Rinnegan, people have noticed your link to the Sennin and want to exploit that.” He isn’t unkind while saying this, but as his former students it’s clear he’s pissed off in their stead too. To know that in essence some random people seem to think his students are meant to be sold off to the highest bidder because of their bloodlines is absurd.

Kakashi sighs, “I called you here, to tell you, and to offer a solution that makes all of this meaningless in the future. I don’t want someone to think they’re better than you, or just show up here demanding to speak to either of you. No one that I got an offer from is good enough for my cure little monsters, after all.”

All three of them beam at him, which is when he pulls out another stack of papers, “No one, except the others in the group. So… And I know this is not the way this is normally done, but my suggestion would be to marry each other. To take the possibility of someone else out of the equation entirely and not have to deal with fangirls once more.”

Sasuke shivers at that, nodding in agreement. Even Naruto agrees, even if he didn’t have to deal with them for long after Pain, but still.

The three of them looked at each other, they had been talking about the future but nowhere had marriage been suggested. But it does make sense and in the case of Naruto and Sasuke, that means that the feud will officially be laid to rest. Wincing as they look at Sakura, as marriage does mean an heir.

The only woman of their trio shrugs, “I know what I am getting into and I don’t mind.” Her cheeks flush, “I always did want to help Sasuke restore his clan and now I can do the same for both of you, seems like a perfect plan really.”

Naruto and Sasuke both beam at her, before they turn back to Kakashi and nod. Taking a hold of the papers he hands them and fills them in. Kakashi also signs them, looking quite giddy, before pronouncing them husbands and wife. Cheering as they kiss and looking absolutely delighted he’ll be able to tell people to go fuck themselves as Sasuke and Naruto are spoken for and if they don’t want to believe him they can go and take it up with their wife.

As they leave the office with the intention of getting back to bed, the notion that they are married now drops. Leading to them eventually sleeping, after christening their bed as a married trouple and additionally, enjoying their wedding night.




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