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Seungkwan kept looking at his hyungs and their significant others and sometimes he can’t help but ask when would he be able to find the same kind of love.
Seungkwan’s career kept going strong after being discovered from their university’ boy band group ‘Lalali’. He continued working in a talent agency with his hyungs Seungcheol, Jihoon, and Soonyoung, as well as his best friend Vernon.
It’s been two years since he had been signed on in their company. To be honest, he was enjoying every bit of it. He loved his fans, enjoyed promotions, loved coming up with new steps and choreography with Soonyoung, and new songs with Vernon and Jihoon.
It’s not until a few months later that the thought of him being single kept him up at night.
Ro Hee, Minnie and Seokmin’s daughter, cried the whole hour as everyone had dinner in the couple’s apartment as they all celebrated Joshua and Peach’s engagement. Seungcheol was on leave as he just got married to Abigail and are on their honeymoon trip, so it was just the 12 members of Lalali and their partners.
Everyone passed Ro Hee around trying to calm her down, but nothing worked.
Seungkwan held his arms out, insisting they give him her niece. ‘Let me try. Maybe she’s getting sleepy.’
‘Good luck. She hates naptime routines.’ Seokmin said as he passed his daughter to Seungkwan.
Ro Hee squirmed in his arms, resisting the way his uncle carried him, but instead he adjusted the way he cradles Ro Hee and sings her a lullaby he heard on social media.
Close your eyes
Don’t go yet
Let the stillness soften every breath
The world can wait just one more song
To carry you where your dreams belong
I’ll hold this moment soft and true
While the night sings just for you
‘Seungkwan, that’s a beautiful song,’ Peach commended the younger man as he rocked the baby girl to sleep, finally quiet and at peace.
‘Kwannie, you’d be a great dad someday. I know it,’ Minnie added to Peach’s comment. He was the gentlest of the group when it comes to children and his soft voice calms children and babies down.
‘How does it feel to be Ro Hee’s favourite uncle?’ Chan teased but his smile showed everyone he was a bit jealous of Seungkwan being able to make Ro Hee calm down.
‘How does it feel that Ro Hee doesn’t want you to make her sleep?’ Mingyu teased Chan back, and the room erupted in a quiet kind of laughter filled with warmth.
Seungkwan looked back at the scene and smiled. I’m content with this for a while, he thought.
‘Seungkwan,’ Jihoon called quietly to the younger. ‘Any thoughts about dating soon?’
Seungkwan smirked before responding. ‘That’s rich coming from my hyung who rejects every invitation to a date from the ladies at work,’ Seungkwan handed Ro Hee back to Minnie and sat back at the table with the rest of the group.
‘Hey, I only asked because some of the ladies in the company were asking if you’re open to dating. I heard some of the new hires were trying to catch your attention last time,’ Jihoon took a sip of whiskey from his glass. ‘Also, you know how I don’t like to date someone from the company. It’ll create too much drama and issues.’
‘Maybe the person I should date is also outside of the company,’ Seungkwan took Jihoon’s glass and added more whiskey before taking a sip as well, then returning the cup to his hyung.
‘I can’t believe we’re all at our marrying age already,’ Wonwoo pointed out as he was messing Chan’s hair. ‘We all first met when this dude was still a kid and cried about his term paper deadlines.’
‘Yup. And we used to just talk about deadlines, practices, and where to drink. Now, we’re all talking about diapers, who’s engaged, and who should go out and date,’ Jun smiled as he said it.
‘I still think Seungkwan should get married next,’ Soonyoung chimed in.
‘Why? Aren’t you talking and dating someone right now, hyung?’ Minghao asked, and Soonyoung quickly shushed him.
‘I’m your best friend and yet this is the first time I’m hearing about this?’ Jihoon pretended to be hurt, but smirking all the same.
‘Hey! I told you about her!’ Soonyoung slapped his arm. ‘Also, you’re dating too!’
‘Nope. She left Korea,’ Jihoon corrected him.
‘HUH?’ the group collectively gasp at the news.
‘Wait! Jihoon-hyung? Dating? Really?’ Vernon was aghast. Knowing his hyung as such an introvert, him dating was not in their bingo cards.
‘Shut up, Vernon. Weren’t you also caught by Ye Jun talking quietly on the phone. Who is Aimee?’ Jihoon asked as Vernon blushed and drank his soju.
‘Chan, the others from the team told me you hit it off with one of the assistants of the previous client,’ Minnie inquired about their maknae’s dating life.
Chan sat up straight and moved to sit next to Minnie. ‘Noona, you remember that second assistant for the client last month, right? The one with black hair and blue highlights? She asked me out to dinner!’
‘Jun? Hao? Gyu? Wonwoo? Any updates on you guys?’ Joshua smiled at the younger ones.
‘Well, I’ve decided that I’ll just let you all know when I’m engaged,’ Jun laughed.
‘I agree with Jun’s plan. You’re all to nosy and noisy to have a good dating life,’ Minghao said.
‘I know Wonwoo-hyung’s dating life, but I agree with these two. I’d like to keep it quiet until I have to tell,’ Mingyu said before taking a big gulp of beer.
‘Same,’ Wonwoo curtly said before taking another piece of gimbap. ‘Also, why is no one grilling Jeonghan-hyung about his love life?’
‘You want to get on the wrong end of my evil ideas?’ Jeonghan snapped back at Wonwoo, who raised his hands in front of him as a sign of surrender. The rest of the pack laughed at the retort.
‘No pressure, just asking,’ Seokmin reminded the four before leaving the room to check on his daughter in the other room.
Peach noticed the silence coming from Seungkwan’s side. ‘You know, love doesn’t always come easy to everyone,’ she said quietly.
‘It seemed to find you well though, noona,’ Seungkwan replied sadly.
‘It found me quickly. Left me in a hurry. Then gave me a hard time before I met Joshua,’ Peach reminded the younger. ‘Love comes to those who believe it.’
‘Are you quoting Celine Dion to me, noona?’ Seungkwan smiled.
‘Yes,’ Peach replied sheepishly.
‘I knew I liked you the moment I met you,’ Seungkwan met her eyes and smiled.
‘Don’t stress too much about it. Maybe she’s also waiting for you,’ Peach ruffled Seungkwan’s hair before offering a glass of soju to the younger.
Seungkwan laid in bed that night thinking of what Peach said and decided that it will be a problem for another day.
---------------
‘Seungkwan-hyung!’ a younger idol from another group called out after him as he passed them by after taping their performances for the music bank.
‘Oh! Han! How was your performance with Blu?’ Seungkwan automatically responded to his junior. The younger stopped to fill Seungkwan in on what had happened in a matter of a few minutes.
‘Han, we need to go,’ a lady, somewhat older than Han, maybe Seungkwan’s age, came in to snatch Han away from him and led him over to the rest of their group. Han could only wave goodbye to his hyung as he was pushed lightly to their section of the backstage.
Seungkwan waved absent-mindedly, looking more at the manager than at Han.
That night, he lied awake again in bed, this time thinking of the manager that took Han away from their conversation. She seemed familiar, looked familiar, but he can’t put his finger on it.
Seungkwan tossed and turned for a good 10 minutes before finding the lullaby song that he sings for Ro Hee and playing it on his Bluetooth speaker in low volume. After a few minutes, he was lulled to sleep.
‘You should stop teasing him!’ a girl around her age but a bit smaller than him called out to the bigger boys who were bullying him.
Seungkwan was 5 years old. He was back to being the chubby kid that everyone wanted to make fun of – calling him all mean nicknames, pushing him around, and making him cry.
He looked up and saw that the girl was throwing stones at the bullies, chasing them away. When the boys were gone, she turned to him.
‘Are you okay?’ she asked, offering a handkerchief to him. She looked down and saw that he had a scraped knee. ‘Oh, you’re hurt!’
Moving quickly, she ran to the nearest drinking fountain and put some water on the handkerchief. She dabbed it on his scraped knee, carefully cleaning it. She then got to her knees and opened the handkerchief, making sure that the dry and clean part touched the wound and carefully wrapped it around Seungkwan’s knee.
‘There.’ She said with satisfaction. ‘Now, stop crying.’ She wiped his tears and fixed his hair. ‘You should stand up for yourself, too. My grandma keeps telling me that I have to be strong and be brave. Especially if I want to keep on reaching my dreams.’
She sat down next to him before she continued. ‘I think you’d be a great singer someday. I heard you singing. Those boys were just jealous that they can’t sing and dance well like you.’ She paused and looked at him with utmost curiosity. ‘Do you want to be a singer? Like a KPop idol?’
Seungkwan nodded. She jumped up.
‘Then you have to be brave! Being a KPop idol is not for the weak of heart! You’re gonna go through trainings, your bosses will be meaner than those boys, and haters will insult you a lot even if you’re the best singer there is! You have to be strong!’ The girl’s eye lit with an intensity he had never seen before. ‘And when the day comes that you become a singer, I will be there on the front of your concert to cheer for you!’ She beamed, all her teeth visible through her wide smile.
Seungkwan looked at her with such admiration. I want to be as confident as her, he thought.
‘Baby! Time to go home!’ a woman from a few feet away called the girl.
‘Okay, eomma!’ she called back. She turned to Seungkwan one last time. ‘Promise me you’ll be strong and brave, and you’ll be a singer!’ She held out her pinky finger, showing she wants an official promise. Seungkwan offered his right pinky finger and entwined it with hers. ‘Promise,’ he said. She beamed widely and let go of his hand. She ran back to her mom before turning back to him and waving her hand way up high over her head and yelling ‘Bye bye!’
Seungkwan opened his eyes gently before turning to his side. He felt tears streaming down his face as he remembers the vividly nostalgic dream he just had. He turned again to the other side and forced himself to continue sleeping.
----------
A few weeks had passed, and he was at another station to tape another episode of the music countdown. Blu was there too. Han made eye contact with him and gave him a big wave, yelling ‘hyung.’ Seungkwan waved back at the younger man, and after he had put his hand down, he scanned the people near Han and tried to find the woman he saw last time.
He was too busy trying to find the woman that he did not notice that Vernon stood next to him. ‘Seungkwan, are you okay? Ready?’ he asked. His question immediately made Seungkwan grounded.
He took a deep breath and turned to Vernon. ‘Yeah. I’m ready.’ He meant that. Months of practicing with Soonyoung, coaching with Jihoon, pep talks with Seungcheol, and making new songs with Vernon. Years of training, building his dreams with Lalali, working hard, training hard, this was the result of all his hard work.
As he was making his way to the stage, Vernon pats his shoulders, hyping him up. He sang his song, a new one he composed with Vernon and produced by Jihoon. His moves were choreographed by Soonyoung. He can’t help but feel like he was representing his brothers from Lalali on that stage. He wanted to make them exceptionally proud.
He made every move precise, hitting every beat, extending his arms all the way up, kicking, jumping, turning to the music. He felt his own emotions and poured it out in his song, just like how Jihoon told him to. He hit all his high noteds cleanly and effortlessly. He felt like Seokmin would be proud of him.
He waited for the ending fairy to finish before he bowed and thanked his fans for coming to the taping of the countdown show. He smiled and waved at everybody as he was making his way to the side of the stage where Vernon was beaming widely, giving him two thumbs up for his job well done.
‘You killed it!’ Vernon gave him a congratulatory hug. He hugged Vernon back and muttered a breathless ‘Thanks’ before they followed their staff to the dressing room. As they were walking down the hall, a woman passed by Seungkwan, narrowly missing his shoulder.
He felt the same feeling he had before and looked back. There she was. Her hair was pulled into two space buns, headset sitting in front of those space buns, and she was talking into the microphone of the headset. She quickly moved past him, unaware that she was under scrutiny of Seungkwan.
‘You know her?’ Vernon asked.
‘I don’t.’ Seungkwan replied curtly and followed him back to his dressing room.
On their way back to the office, Seungkwan slouched in the car, looking defeated. Vernon noticed. (Of course, he does.)
‘For someone who won the music countdown today, and did a very good job with the performance, you are pretty quiet and looking defeated there.’ Vernon spoke quietly.
‘Do you ever cross paths with someone and feel like you know them, but you don’t know where and when you met?’ Seungkwan answered, keeping his gaze out the window of the car. It had started to rain outside.
‘Is this about the lady we passed by earlier?’ Vernon inquired.
‘I think so. I feel like I’ve known her before but I’m not sure. And I don’t even know her name,’ he shrugged. ‘I must be out of my mind, right?’ Seungkwan turned to Vernon with a weak smile.
‘You’re not. At least, I think you’re not.’ Vernon smiled back at him and squeezed his hand. He was Seungkwan’s best friend for mainly this reason. He keeps Seungkwan’s confidence in check and makes sure that he feels seen and heard and loved. For that, Seungkwan is always grateful for Vernon.
‘You wanna have dinner today? You, me, and Chan? We haven’t had a maknae dinner in a while,’ Vernon suggested.
Seungkwan lit up at the thought of having dinner with his two closest friends. ‘Yes, please! That Japanese restaurant with the omurice and fluffy pancakes!’
Vernon chuckled. ‘Okay, I’ll tell Chan to go and meet us there. Let’s drop off our things in the office first.’
They quickly changed clothes in the office, dropped off some things, Seungkwan removed his make up, and changed into more comfortable shoes, and he set off with Vernon to the Japanese restaurant that the three of them love.
Chan was already there when they arrived. He waved at the two and guided them to the table he chose. He knew that Seungkwan loved to sit at the alfresco area and look out on to the city skyline. Seungkwan felt grateful for Chan as well for his choice of the seating area. They exchanged stories about work, Seungkwan’s performance at today’s taping, Vernon’s latest songs, Chan’s possible promotion by the end of the year. They exchanged congratulations and good jobs, celebrating their wins and the fruits of their hard work.
‘Any update on that girl you’re flirting with in the office?’ Vernon suddenly asked.
‘Nah, she’s not from our office. I think the hyungs are right. It’s better not to date anyone from the same company, in case you break up or it becomes messy.’ Chan took a sip of beer from his glass, ‘She’s from another company. We’re kinda taking things slow. You know, be friends first. I mean this is the first time I am dating someone for real.’
‘Didn’t you date that girl back in uni?’ Seungkwan inquired.
‘Nah. She just wanted me to do all her term papers for her. She thought flirting with me would be an easy way for her to graduate because she’s pretty,’ Chan shook his head. ‘Who is Aimee by the way?’
‘You know that upcoming soloist idol? AZee?’ Seungkwan responded before Vernon can verbalise his objection.
‘Yeah, she’s pretty.’ Chan grinned at Vernon’s discomfort.
‘Aimee is her composer. I think they worked on a song with Jihoon-hyung, and Vernon and Aimee hit it off, I guess.’ Seungkwan continued.
‘I’m only hearing about this now?’ Chan asked.
‘We haven’t had time to have dinner, just the three of us, you know?’ Vernon said. ‘Anyway, Kwan has eyes for one of Blu’s managers.’
‘Why would you disclose that? You’ll jinx it!’ Seungkwan cried foul at Vernon’s revelation.
‘I need to retaliate. Hahaha!’ Vernon laughed out loud as he took big gulps of his beer.
Chan chortled next to him. ‘She’s probably very pretty if she caught Kwan’s eyes.’
‘Actually, I’m not that sure. But she feels familiar. Like I met her somewhere before.’ Seungkwan was playing with his glass of beer.
‘Hey, who knows. Maybe you’ll meet her properly soon.’ Seungkwan loved Chan’s positivity and his way of looking at things in a very hopeful manner. They had another round of drinks before calling it a night and parted ways.
Seungkwan felt like taking the bus, as it was already late night and the traffic would probably have eased up. He walked up to the bus stop and sat on the bench.
He saw that there was a woman sitting on the opposite side of the bench. Space buns on her head and a white headphone in front of it. She changed her shirt but she was still wearing jeans like this morning. He contemplated if he should say hi. Thinking this might be his only shot at talking to her, he moved closer to her.
‘Hi,’ he called out, waving his hand to call her attention. It somehow worked because she looked up from her phone and took off her headphone.
‘Can I help you?’ she responded.
‘You’re Blu’s manager, right? Or at least you’re part of their staff?’ Seungkwan asked.
‘Yes. Do I know you? You look familiar.’ She squinted her eyes to check if she did know him.
‘Boo Seungkwan.’ He introduced himself and extended his hand as greeting.
‘Oh! Seungkwan-ssi! I’m sorry! How rude of me!’ she quickly got up and bowed. Seungkwan got flustered and waved his hand to stop her from bowing.
‘No, no! It’s okay. We’re outside of work anyway. You can just call me Seungkwan,’ he said his name again, hoping she’d take the hint and tell her name.
‘Oh, I’m Ha Eun. Jeong Ha Eun.’ She bowed again as she said her name.
‘Really, no need to bow so much. It’s okay.’ Ha Eun straightened herself and tried to hide the blush creeping up her neck to her cheeks. Seungkwan smiled. ‘You’re going this way?’
‘Ah, yeah. I went out to have dinner with some friends,’ Ha Eun explained.
‘Same.’ Seungkwan felt like he should say more but he didn’t want to look stupid or overshare to Ha Eun.
‘Are you coming next week for the next countdown show?’ Ha Eun said after a few minutes of silence.
‘Yes. I think that one will be the last for my mini album’s promotion,’ Seungkwan recalled his schedule.
‘Blu still has two more after the one next week. They keep on practising daily.’ Ha Eun continued. ‘How do you do it? I mean, isn’t it difficult? The boys are having some difficulty with their activities as a group, but you have to do everything on your own.’
Seungkwan stopped to think of his answer. No one had really asked him about it. ‘Hmmm. I guess I can do it well because I have my hyungs and my best friends to help me through it all.’
‘Is it true that you had an amateur KPop boy group back in your uni days?’ Ha Eun asked.
‘Yeah. The hyungs I’m talking about are the ones from that group. They were the ones that encouraged me to keep going and be an idol. Four other members from our old group still works with me.’ Seungkwan shared his story with pride. He was always proud of his hyungs, and Vernon and Chan.
‘That’s actually really cool,’ Ha Eun said, but she was cut short by the arrival of the bus. ‘Oh my. This is my bus. Are you getting on as well?’
‘Yup.’ Seungkwan stood up. OH NO. This is not my bus.
Seungkwan kept on going, paying the fare and following Ha Eun into the bus like he was supposed to be there after all. He instinctively said yes, and followed Ha Eun into the bus though he had to wait for another bus line.
They sat at the back, sharing stories, talking about handling Blu and how the younger boys were harder to handle lately due to their habits of being late.
‘Hahaha! I think I can help out. I’ll talk to Han and the guys on your behalf.’ Seungkwan promised.
‘Really? Promise?’ Ha Eun extended her pinky finger towards Seungkwan. Seungkwan momentarily had a flashback of the girl when he was five and being bullied in the playground.
‘Promise.’ He linked his pinky around hers, same as the time when he was five and he promised to be an idol to the stranger of a girl who saved him.
‘Oh, this is my stop. I’ll see you next week, I guess.’ Ha Eun gathered her bag and started to walk to the exit door of the bus. She gave Seungkwan a big wave above her head, triggering another wave of memories of the girl from the playground.
He waved back at Ha Eun and said goodbye. He got off on the next bus stop, and hailed a ride service with his mobile phone. He was already in a different part of town and he was not sure how to get back to his place from here.
He was surprised a few hours later when he woke up the following morning and remembering having the same dream as last time – about the girl he met in the playground when he was five.
-------
The following week, Seungkwan’s taping went smoothly. He finished his performance and stood at the side of the stage, watching his hoobaes in Blu, finish their performance for the show.
‘Sunbae!’ Han called to Seungkwan as they exited the stage. Seungkwan walked over to them to congratulate the whole group.
‘Hey! Congrats! That was a solid performance!’ Seungkwan said. The boys blushed, and one by one bowed their heads, thanking Seungkwan for his praises.
‘Hey, one of your managers told me you guys are getting tardy to your schedules. Cut them some slack and be punctual to your schedules, you punks,’ Seungkwan gave them a teasing smile. ‘I’m serious though. Always honour your staff’s time and efforts by coming on time and sending them home on time to their own families.’
‘Yes, sunbae,’ the boys chorused and thanked Seungkwan for his reminders.
‘Thanks,’ a woman’s voice spoke behind him. ‘I hope they do remember it, because it came from you.’ Ha Eun stood behind him, wearing her staff t-shirt and her headset. ‘Don’t get me wrong, they’re good boys, just late for most times.’
Seungkwan looked at her and tried to memorise her features. The moles on the corner of her eyes, the way her nose scrunches up when she laughs, and the way her hair waves around her face.
‘They are good kids. I think they’ll listen,’ Seungkwan said again.
‘Hey, thanks again. I got to go now and those guys have a meeting with our CEO this afternoon,’ Ha Eun began gathering her things and some of the Blu boys’ things to get ready to go home.
‘Hey. It’s nothing. I’ll see you around,’ Seungkwan answered her back.
Seungkwan also started to walk back to his dressing room where some of the staff are waiting for him. ‘Is someone using the toilet? I need to pee,’ he asked his manager.
‘Yep, someone’s inside. If you’re really urgent, you can go to the public toilet outside,’ his manager suggested.
‘Ok. That’s fine with me.’ Seungkwan went outside to find the signs pointing the way towards the public toilet. He reached the toilet and thanked his lucky stars that the toilet was very clean. He did his business in the toilet and came out of the stall to wash his hands. He just got outside the men’s toilet when he heard a loud scream from the adjacent room. Seungkwan’s curiosity got the best of him and he went in to the room.
‘Hello!? Anyone here?’ he called out to the seemingly empty room.
‘Help!’ a voice answered.
Seungkwan ran to the middle of the room and tried to find the source of the voice.
‘No! Don’t let the door close! It locks automatically from the outside!’ the voice said.
Seungkwan tried to chase the closing door but he was too late. The door closed shut with a click. ‘Shit!’ Seungkwan and the voice yelled together.
Seungkwan decided to shift his attention to the voice. ‘Where are you? I heard you shout. Are you okay?’
‘I’m here behind the curtain,’ the voice told him. He moved towards the curtain, his cautiousness leading the way. Behind the curtain, he found Ha Eun holding a wriggling little boy. The boy grunted and tried to break free.
‘Ha Eun? What are you doing here?’ Seungkwan asked, a bit scared for the answer.
‘This is my boss’ grandson! His name is Theo. He ran in here and I had to chase him. I already caught him and we were about to go out the door but we found out that it locks from the outside. So, he took the opportunity to make a run for it because he thinks this is a game,’ Ha Eun kept trying to carry to boy who seems to be around 3 or 4 years old.
‘Theo, come here please.’ Seungkwan squat down to Theo’s level and tried to coax him over.
Theo still squirmed in Ha Eun’s arms, refusing to cooperate. Ha Eun struggles to keep her hold on to him, trying to balance her strength, keeping him restrained but not too hard that he would hurt the boy.
Seungkwan stepped closer and squatted low to look into Theo’s eyes. ‘Theo, your noona’s having a hard time holding you. Later the two of you will fall down and get hurt.’ Theo looked up to meet Seungkwan’s gaze. His eyes were glassy like he’s about to cry.
‘Noona will scold me,’ he said.
‘No, she won’t but she’s scared that you might get hurt, though.’ Seungkwan assured him. Theo stopped squirming just enough for Ha Eun to fix her stance and regain her balance. Theo moved out of her arms and went closer to Seungkwan.
‘Noona will not scold me?’ Theo repeated.
‘I’m not angry with you. But you have to understand that running away from everybody was dangerous and you could get hurt,’ Ha Eun explained after catching her breath. ‘I’m scared. Because now we’re stuck in this room and I left my phone in the dressing room.’
Theo looked like he was about to cry. Ha Eun tried her best not to sound angry but she was, contrary to what she was saying just now. They were separated from their respective teams and no one was aware of where they were. On top of that, she left her phone in the dressing room.
‘Seungkwan-ssi.’ She began, hopeful that her next words would have a positive answer. ‘Do you have your phone with you?’
Seungkwan instinctively reached for his back pocket only to realise his phone was also inside his dressing room.
His face must have been a dead giveaway to what he just realised because Ha Eun sighed in exasperation.
‘My phone is in my bag too,’ Seungkwan explained.
‘So we’re stuck here. And no one is aware of where we are,’ Ha Eun said.
‘No one knows where we are?’ Theo echoed quietly. He started to tremble before letting out a loud wail. ‘I’m… sowwy… noooonaaaa!’ He cried, head tilted back, his tears streaming down his face, mucus dripping from his nose. ‘I just… wanted to… play…’ he continued between sniffles.
Ha Eun’s heart softened at the sight. The boy had been behave for most of the times that he was with the crew for different events. Which was why she was surprised when he ran off and hid in the room where they are. She crouched down to hug the boy and pat his back.
‘Grandpa forced you to come with us, huh?’ She asked quietly.
The boy nodded and sniffled before answering back, ‘I told him… I want to… stay with mama… because… I will play… with my friend… then… he said… I should go… with him… and we’ll play… together…’ Theo took a deep breath, ‘BUT GRANDPA DIDN’T WANT TO PLAY WITH ME BECAUSE HE WAS TALKING ON THE PHONE!’
Seungkwan’s heart swelled with pity for the boy who was given false promises. He took the boy from Ha Eun and gave him a tight hug. Theo wrapped his arms around Seungkwan’s neck. Seungkwan lifted the boy and led them to a few chairs scattered near the door of the room. He sat down, the boy still hugging his neck and sitting on his lap.
Ha Eun observed how Seungkwan took care of Theo, his gentle words and how he made sure the boy is safe and secure in his arms. Seungkwan cradled the boy’s head on his shoulder, and made him calm enough to stop crying.
‘Ahjussi,’ Theo said.
‘Excuse me?’ Seungkwan pretended to get hurt at the comment. ‘She’s noona, but I’m ahjussi? I’m hyung!’
Theo giggled at how Seungkwan responded. ‘Hyung, I’m hungry.’
‘Me too.’ He turned to Ha Eun, ‘Are you hungry too, Ha Eun?’
Ha Eun smiled. ‘I’m still okay.’ As soon as she gave her answer, her stomach rumbled loudly for all three of them to hear. Theo laughed at the sound of Ha Eun’s stomach and jumped down from Seungkwan’s lap to hug her.
‘Noona, you’re hungry too.’ Theo said as he buried his face in her stomach.
Ha Eun laughed. ‘I guess I am.’
The three of them passed the time playing games like rock, scissors, paper, and cham-cham-cham. After a while, Seungkwan taught Ha Eun and Theo how to play the Hongsam game he always played with Lalali. Soon enough, the room was filled with Theo’s laughs.
They lost track of time and Theo was beginning to get sleepy. Seungkwan took him in his arms, letting him lean on his shoulders. Theo began to yawn, ‘Hyung. What will we do if no one finds us in this room?’
‘We’ll find another way out. Let me and Ha Eun-noona think about that. Just rest first.’ Seungkwan said.
Theo nodded and leaned back in his shoulder. Seungkwan began to sing.
Close your eyes
Don’t go yet
Let the stillness soften every breath
The world can wait just one more song
To carry you where your dreams belong
I’ll hold this moment soft and true
While the night sings just for you
Ha Eun sat at a fair distance from Seungkwan and she saw how this man was able to comfort and care for a boy he had not known before and make sure that she and the boy are both safe. She felt safe near him. Safe that he’s here to protect them. She felt a kind of warmth that she had not felt before… like he was not a stranger. Like she wanted to be closer to him.
She memorised his features – long lashes, hair falling down on his forehead, his pinkish lips, the softness of his voice that has magnetic melodies. His body was not buff, but she can see the outline of his biceps peeking out of the sleeve of his shirt. She couldn’t help but swallow at the thought of touching his biceps.
Odd enough, she suddenly thought of a boy back in Jeju. A five-year-old boy that she found crying in the playground as bullies tried to kick him. The boy had scratches on his knees, so she put some water on her handkerchief to clean his wounds and wrap it up. She later found out that he wanted to be a Kpop idol, so she made him promise to be brave and strong so he could be an idol in the future.
I wonder if he made it, she thought. She looked at Seungkwan, thinking about his career as an idol. Seungkwan found her staring at him.
‘Are you okay?’ Seungkwan asked.
‘I’m fine. I just remembered an old friend, I guess.’ Ha Eun half confessed.
‘Scoot over here. You’re probably very tired already,’ Seungkwan patted the space next to him to coax her over.
She obliged and moved over to sit next to him. ‘You did really well with Theo.’
‘My older sister has kids. I like kids too,’ Seungkwan said.
‘You’d be a good dad in the future, I guess,’ she replied.
‘Hmm. My friends think so too,’ Seungkwan admitted. ‘I’m usually the one who can make my friends’ kid sleep.’
‘You have a very lovely voice and kids really like to hear it. I mean a lot of people do.’ Ha Eun yawned as she said it, exhaustion starting to creep up on her. Seungkwan noticed and he moved closer to her, silently offering his shoulder for her to lean on.
Ha Eun did not notice his gesture but she was pretty much exhausted that she just leaned on to him, and slowly drifted off to sleep. Seungkwan followed, being lulled to sleep by Theo’s weight on his chest, and Ha Eun’s warmth on his shoulder.
Half an hour passed and they all woke up to the startling sound of the door being opened.
‘SEUNGKWAN? ARE YOU HERE?’ Vernon’s voice echoed from the door and Seungkwan responded.
‘Vernon? Is that you?’ He called out. Vernon frantically ran around the room to find him, and when he did, he stopped to stare at the sight in front of him. Seungkwan couldn’t stand up as he was trapped – a child was straddled over him, and a girl leaning on his shoulder.
‘Seungkwan!’ Vernon exhaled, before squatting down on the floor like he was too darn relieved to finally find his best friend.
‘Vernon, the door. It only locks from the outside,’ Seungkwan had a slight panic on his face.
‘It’s okay, there are security personnel holding the door open.’ Vernon looked up at Seungkwan. ‘Damn! You had me looking for you for an hour! I thought you got hurt or something.’
‘I’m sorry. We got trapped here.’ Seungkwan tried to explain, pointing to the two sitting with him.
‘And they are?’ Vernon asked.
‘Ha Eun-ssi, Blu’s manager, and Theo. He is Blu’s CEO’s grandkid.’ Seungkwan explained. He saw Vernon’s eye grow wide.
‘They’ve been panicking as well! They’ve been looking for the two of them for an hour too!’ Vernon was frantic. He dialled a number on his phone, and it seemed to connect to a call. ‘Han! I found Seungkwan. He got trapped in a room with outside locking. He got trapped here with your manager and your CEO’s grandkid… hmm… uh-huh… no need. I’ll bring them back to the dressing rooms… okay… no problem.’
Vernon hung his phone. Then he looked at the trio, smiled fondly as Seungkwan coaxed Ha Eun to wake up, and gently standing while making sure that Theo doesn’t wake up. ‘Let’s go?’ He asked Seungkwan, and the latter nodded. Seungkwan held on to Ha Eun’s hand and guided her out of the room where the door was held by two personnel. The trio walked in front of Vernon, the latter smirking fondly at his best friend.
He took a photo of the trio from behind, and sent it to Chan. ‘Shhh. Don’t tell the hyungs.’ He texted Chan.
‘THEO!’ Blu’s CEO rushed over to Seungkwan to take Theo from him. Theo began to cry and cling tighter to Seungkwan.
‘NO! I want Seungkwan-hyung! I want Ha Eun-noona!’ He wailed. ‘You did not keep your promise! You didn’t play with me! That’s why I ran away from you!’ Theo tried to kick his grandpa away from him and the CEO looked flustered and embarrassed at the thought that people can hear he neglected his grandson.
Ha Eun tried to diffuse the situation. ‘It’s okay Theo. Let’s go. We have to go home. You’re already hungry right?’ Theo cried louder as Ha Eun took him away.
‘SEUNGKWAN-HYUNG!’ He wailed hugging Ha Eun but his hand was reaching for Seungkwan.
Seungkwan closed their gap, and wiped Theo’s tears. ‘Shhh. We can see each other again. It’s okay. Go with Ha Eun-noona first. We’ll find time to go out again next time. Okay?’
‘You promise?’ Theo’s face was red and his cheeks puffed up with all the crying he was doing.
‘I promise. But you have to be strong and brave, okay?’ Seungkwan offered his pinky finger to Theo.
Unknown to him, Ha Eun’s ears perked up at the words he just said to Theo. It reminded her of the promise she made with the boy in Jeju.
‘Be a good boy and follow your grandpa. I promise. We’ll go out next time to play again. But right now, you need to go home, eat, and rest. Okay?’ Seungkwan gave gentle instructions to the boy, to which the younger nodded as he kept his grip tight on Ha Eun’s neck.
‘Be nice and don’t run away anymore from Ha Eun-ssi.’ Seungkwan waved to them goodbye as Ha Eun began to walk away to the direction of Blu’s dressing room. She turned back to mouth ‘Thank you’ to Seungkwan.
Seungkwan waved and watched them go. Vernon stood next to him. ‘You okay, buddy?’ He asked. Seungkwan just nodded. They packed their bags and loaded it all in the van and went back to the office where Soonyoung, Jihoon, and Seungcheol greeted them with worried faces.
‘What the heck happened, Seungkwan? Are you okay?’ Cheol’s voice was loud enough to make Seungkwan’s knees buckle. He suddenly realised that he was hungry.
‘Hyung. I thought you’re gonna come back tomorrow?’ Seungkwan responded.
‘I was. I came straight to the office from the airport when Vernon said you were missing! I got so worried about you, Kwan!’ Cheol’s face was indeed laced with worry. The eldest moved in swift strides to close the gap between them and hug Seungkwan. ‘Are you okay?’ He whispered. Seungkwan nodded. ‘Are you hungry?’ He asked again and the latter nodded again. Seungcheol chuckled and ushered the two maknaes back to his office. Soonyoung and Jihoon walked behind Vernon and asked in whispers what happened to Seungkwan. Vernon whispered back what he knew.
In the office, Cheol instructed Ye Jun, his assistant, to order food quickly for the two maknaes. Ye Jun moved quickly, called a nearby restaurant and got iced coffee for the two younger men.
They talked about what happened, how Seungkwan heard someone screaming in the room near the men’s toilet, how the door is a one way lock, and how the three of them got trapped in the room.
They kept chatting over their lunch, making sure that Seungkwan was okay throughout their meal. Soonyoung kept getting water for Seungkwan, Jihoon kept adding meat to his plate, Vernon kept passing him the soya sauce, the table napkins, the pepper, whatever Seungkwan needed. Seungcheol kept asking what else does he want to eat. He also cancelled Seungkwan’s afternoon practices and told the younger that he and Vernon should go home and rest. The morning was traumatic enough as it was.
Soonyoung and Jihoon wanted to pry about Ha Eun, but they decided it was not the time to bring it up. There’s always a next time for that.
They watched as the two maknaes get into the company cars and instructed the drivers to drop them off at their respective residences.
Seungkwan took a quick shower when he got home and decided that he needs to take a long nap.
He was already in his bed when his phone beeped. He looked at the message and was genuinely surprised.
[Hey, it’s Ha Eun. I got your number from Han. Thanks again for this morning. I don’t know what else would have happened to me and Theo if you didn’t come by to help us. Thanks again. :) ]
Seungkwan typed his reply with a smile on his face. [No worries. I’m glad you and Theo are okay.]
Ha Eun: [I want to treat you to a meal to properly thank you.]
Seungkwan: [There really is no need for that. I’m happy to help.]
Seungkwan regretted his last message and thought he might be pushing her away. He quickly followed up with another message.
Seungkwan: [How about we just go out for dinner as friends? Not because you need to repay me for anything.]
Ha Eun’s breath hitched at Seungkwan’s message. [There really is no need for that. I’m happy to help.]
She felt like she was rejected with her confession. What? What confession? I’m just offering to make things even!
She looked at her phone to see his follow up message. [How about we just go out for dinner as friends? Not because you need to repay me for anything.]
Ha Eun’s stomach was quickly filled with butterflies that she did not expect. Was she really that attracted to Seungkwan? She replied, trying to be nonchalant about it.
Ha Eun: [Sure. That sounds nice. Let me get back to you when I get our schedule for next week.]
Seungkwan: [Okay. I’ll do the same.]
Seungkwan lied on his bed with a wide grin on his face. Ha Eun placed her phone on her table and plopped back on her gaming chair. Both of them slept that afternoon with smiles on their faces, thinking about their next meeting.
——-
The days passed by quickly, and it turned into weeks. Seungkwan and Ha Eun were not able to meet up when they were supposed to due to conflicting schedules. They kept postponing and postponing their meeting but kept each other updated with their days and their weeks as they had built the habit of messaging each other.
Seungkwan knows when it’s Ha Eun’s message as he chose a special ringtone for her messages and calls, one that is unique from everyone else’s. Ha Eun anticipates Seungkwan’s messages almost all of the time and makes sure to respond to all of them as quickly as she could.
They talked about their favourite game shows, and how Seungkwan joins a lot of variety shows, or how Ha Eun needed to cook a meal for Blu’s members as they forgot to purchase bento boxes for their activity one time.
They kept each other up to date of their whereabouts and their schedules like they were in a relationship.
Vernon, the ever-present observer in Seungkwan’s life, noticed that he was happier, more excited to go to work, rests better, eats better, practices with much more energy.
Jihoon and Soonyoung noticed it too and kept asking Vernon what the deal with Seungkwan is lately. Vernon could only guess as well as they had not been going out on maknae dinners with Chan lately.
Unable to hold his curiosity, Vernon decided to take the wild approach.
‘You know… I’m upset with you.’ Vernon suddenly said to Seungkwan on one of their composition sessions.
Seungkwan looked up from his phone where he was just replying to Ha Eun’s message and saw Vernon looking up at him from his notebook, pen in between his fingers and poised mid-air.
‘Huh?’ Seungkwan asked, curious if he had misheard his best friend.
‘I’m upset with you.’ Vernon repeated. ‘It has not gotten past me that there’s something special going on with your life, but I thought you’d at least share a piece of news with me, you know, as your best friend.’ He sighed for a dramatic pause. ‘I’m happy for you, really. You’ve looked happier than I’ve ever seen you since I met you, but damn, I keep waiting and waiting for you to tell me the good news, and maybe we could tell Chan too. But I guess I’m not that important of a person for you to share your recent life stories with.’
‘That’s not true,’ Seungkwan tried to defend himself.
Vernon straightened up like he was challenged. ‘Seungkwan. For the past four weeks, you have evaded 5 maknae dinners, dropped 6 of my calls, turned Chan down twice for coffee, declined 3 times when he asked if you want to go jogging, and you do not reply to my messages most of the time anymore.’
Seungkwan felt a pang of guilt. In the middle of his happiness, he forgot about the people who held him up when he was at his lowest. He hung his head low, trying to hide his deep red blush of utter embarrassment.
He heard Vernon sigh once more. ‘You know I’d support you no matter what it is right? But we did promise each other – you, me, Chan – we’d always still be there for each other whether we have significant others. Again, i’m happy for you. I just wish I’m somehow still part of your life, because if the roles were reversed, I’d always want you to be in my life.’
Vernon gathered his things and shoved them into his backpack. He knows very well that Vernon takes a long time to fix his backpack, making sure that it was level on his back, and the straps were even. So, imagine his surprise when Vernon grabbed the top handle of his backpack and left without another word to Seungkwan.
Seungkwan sat there, thinking about their conversation, and realising that Vernon was right. No matter what happens, he needs Vernon and Chan to be with him.
‘Are you and Vernon okay?’ Seungcheol asked Seungkwan after a meeting a few days after his fight with Vernon.
‘Not really.’ Seungkwan bowed his head. He tried to message Vernon, but he did not reply to most of his messages. Chan kept replying with evasive messages as well, proof that even Chan is upset with him.
Seungcheol suddenly gave him a tissue. ‘Take it. You like like you’re about to cry.’
Seungkwan took the tissue and dabbed at the few tears that managed to escape his eyes. He sighed before asking. ‘Hyung. When you were just starting to date Abigail-noona, who else knew apart from us?’
‘I kept Jeonghan and Joshua in the loop. Almost all of the time. We’d go out drinking, talk about our lives and stuff. And I’d tell them.’ Seungcheol paused and looked back at the younger man. ‘You didn’t tell Vernon?’
‘Huh?’ Seungkwan was bewildered.
‘You didn’t tell Vernon about updates about… whatever it is you’re dealing with right now?’ Seungcheol smirked as Seungkwan lowered his head again, confirming the answer to his question.
‘I feel bad about it already.’ Seungkwan sniffled.
‘You should. Because he’d been harassed by Jihoon and Soonyoung all month long, and he just said, “Can we just let him be happy for a while?” Your best friend literally defended you for the longest time, and you haven’t even told him yet.’ Cheol took glasses from the container and walked to the water dispenser. He held out one glass of water to Seungkwan and drank from the other. ‘Vernon will not stop you from dating, or whatever this is, but let him in. Whatever lies ahead, he and Chan will be your best anchor. Even better than the rest of us combined, because the three of you are the same age, same heart, and we’ve always believed that out of all of us, the three of you are the most inseparable.’
Seungkwan nodded at his hyung’s words. Determined to make amends with the two, he messaged them both to meet him tonight at their usual café for dinner.
It was past 7 and Seungkwan was still alone at the café, drinking a yuzu juice. He kept glancing at his watch and texting Chan and Vernon to please come and have dinner with him.
He was about to give up on them showing up when the two finally came near 7:30.
Seungkwan got up to hug his two best friends but they moved away from his reach.
‘You’re paying today,’ Chan said and the two took seats opposite Seungkwan.
They quietly ordered from the menu, food, drinks, dessert, and alcohol, all while not giving a damn of the bill Seungkwan will pay afterwards. After their mains were served, the two ignored Seungkwan’s attempts to start conversations and ate quietly.
They were served their desserts when Chan finally broke the ice.
‘You understand why we’re doing this to you, right?’ He casually said, challenging Seungkwan to pout.
‘Yes.’ Seungkwan quietly said. ‘I’m so sorry. I really didn’t mean to.’
Vernon sighed and placed his fork down on the plate, his soufflé pancake waiting for him to dig in. ‘You’re lucky we can’t stay mad at you for too long. Spill.’
Seungkwan smiled at the thought of his two best friends giving him the chance to make amends. He started his story from the beginning – when he first saw Ha Eun, all the way until their present situation where they keep messaging each other.
‘Why don’t you just take a day off?’ Vernon asked, already on his last piece of the pancake.
‘Yeah. Take a day off and meet her. Take her to a fancy place, or go for a picnic.’ Chan took sips of his beer.
‘I don’t exactly know what to do because I had never been on a date,’ Seungkwan admitted.
‘None of us do,’ Chan said. ‘Even with all of Lalali, it’s just Seokmin-hyung who had the most experience with dating Minnie-noona. But even then, noona was his first girlfriend.’
‘Just ask her out first then plan some activities that you think she’d like to do.’ Vernon suggested. Seungkwan thought about it. Ha Eun said she liked bowling but don’t have much time to go. She was also in to ice skating but Seungkwan had never skated before and he didn’t want her to be burdened with having to teach him.
‘Movies are the safest activity for first dates.’ Chan suggested, seeing how his best friend was racking his brain with what to do for a date.
Seungkwan resigned to the idea and just decided to ask Ha Eun what movie she’d like to watch.
‘Make reservations for a restaurant so she knows you made efforts to make sure of her convenience,’ Vernon chimed again.
‘Make sure to bring her back to her place when it’s over. Be a gentleman and keep her safe,’ Chan pointed out.
They slowly eased back into their old dynamics as best friends, and Seungkwan realised how blessed he truly was to have these two with him.
———-
As the new month rolled in, Seungkwan took a day off on the same day that Ha Eun was off work. He had asked her what movie would she like to watch, and if she has any preference to eat for dinner. They settled on a murder mystery film starring So Ji Sub, and opting to go for dinner at a gourmet burger place that Joshua-hyung loved to go to.
Seungkwan made sure to follow Chan and Vernon’s advices – buy the tickets in advance, make reservations at the restaurant, make sure she doesn’t pay for anything, take her back to her home after.
Seungkwan wore a simple light green knit sweater to compliment his blue jeans, and his black sneakers. He tried his best to be calm about it to no avail. His hands were cold and sweaty, his throat was getting dry, and his sweat keeps forming furiously on his forehead.
A few more minutes passed and Ha Eun came into his view at the entrance of the cinema. What he saw took his breath away.
Ha Eun wore a simple pale yellow sleeveless tank top under a denim jacked and paired with a white maxi skirt. She was wearing open toe sandals as well. Her make up was light and her hair was let down, reaching towards the mid point of her back.
Seungkwan hastily messaged their trio’s group chat. [She’s here. She’s so pretty. Wish me luck.]
He walked up to her to greet her and usher her into the cinema, ensuring her comfort and paying attention to what she might need or want, and taking in all she was saying.
By the end of their dinner, they had talked about the movie and almost everything else there is to talk about. They decided to find a nearby park and take a stroll as both were still enjoying the night and their conversations.
Seungkwan and Ha Eun sat on one of the park benches, and Ha Eun leaned back to look at the stars. Seungkwan gazed at her, taking in the sight of her and her innocent way of admiring the world around her.
‘Theo came by today with his grandpa. He was so sweet. He ran up to me like i’m some best friend he wasn’t able to play with for years,’ Ha Eun shared to Seungkwan while still gazing at the stars.
Seungkwan smiled. ‘I should take another day off to play with him. I did promise after all.’
Ha Eun was reminded of how Seungkwan promised Theo, and the words he said to the young boy. She sat upright and looked directly at Seungkwan.
‘What?’ He asked, clearly confused of her sudden gestures.
‘Nothing. I must be imagining things.’ She decided that a lot of people make the same kind of promises with probably the exact same words. After all, the words she said were not exactly from her alone, but from her grandma.
Seungkwan nodded, and gazed out to the playground. He smiled. Remember the little girl and her kind gesture towards him.
‘What are you smiling at?’ Ha Eun asked him in a sing song manner, almost teasing.
‘Nothing. I just remembered someone from my childhood.’ Seungkwan said.
‘Hmm? First crush?’ Ha Eun continued to tease him.
‘You could say that. But I never saw her again.’ Seungkwan admitted.
‘Tell me what happened,’ she inquired, scooting closer to. Seungkwan like a kid waiting for a bedtime story.
Seungkwan smiled and gave a small laugh. ‘It happened when I was five years old in Jeju. I was a chubby kid and other kids bullied me for being fat. I got called all sorts of names, and pushed around a lot. I changed somehow, I fought back and stood up to bullies when I had to. All because of that girl I met.’
‘What did she say?’ Ha Eun responded, her smile slowly fading. Something tells her that she knows this story.
‘Well, I was at the playground one day, and the bullies followed me there. They saw me practising for the school talent show and I was singing a song that a Kpop girl group sang. I was dancing the choreography too.’ He chuckled at the thought, fondly remembering how he trained on his own to follow Kpop choreographies. ‘So, I was getting beat up by kids from school when this girl, smaller than me but looks like the same age, charged from the edge of the playground and came to my rescue. She threw stones at the bullies, and chased them away.’
Ha Eun’s breath hitched. Could he be the boy? she thought. Seungkwan continued, unaware of Ha Eun’s expressions.
‘After that, she tended to my wounded knee, cleaning it then wrapping it with her handkerchief. Then she consoled me. She said I was a good singer and asked if I want to be an idol. When she found out that I did want to become an idol she said—’
‘You have to be brave and strong. And when the time comes that you do become an idol, I’ll be there in the front row, cheering for you.’
Seungkwan looked at Ha Eun, surprised that she knew what the girl said. Even more surprising that Ha Eun was openly crying and tears were streaming down her face.
‘So it is you,’ she whispered. ‘The boy I met in Jeju.’
A few seconds later, it dawned on Seungkwan why Ha Eun was crying. ‘That was you?’
Ha Eun nodded, ‘I was on a trip with my family because my grandma visited a friend who moved to Jeju. You have a beautiful voice even years ago, and I never forgot your emotion when you sang. I thought maybe I was hallucinating when I thought you sang like that boy, you know, when you were singing a lullaby to Theo.’ She sniffed and took a deep breath. ‘It turns out it is you. And you’re now an idol.’
Ha Eun’s smile was widening slowly. She was beaming while her tears streamed down her cheeks. Seungkwan reached out to wipe her tears and cup her face in his hands.
‘It’s really you. I thought I was mad for thinking you look and feel familiar, but turns out, I’m right,’ Seungkwan whispered as he pulled her face closer to him and placed his forehead on hers. They smiled at the thought that 20 years after they first met, the Universe made them cross paths again.
Seungkwan brought Ha Eun back to her house an hour later. They said their goodbyes and promised to meet again. She was about to enter her building when Seungkwan pulled her by the wrist and coaxed her back. He thought, it was now or never, and kissed her gently on the cheek. ‘Good night, Ha Eun.’ He whispered, then planted the softest of kisses on her forehead before letting her go back up to her building.
Ha Eun stood by the door and waved at Seungkwan, to which he waved back to her.
Seungkwan returned home and processed the information he received the whole day. He took out his phone to inform Ha Eun that he had arrived home safely. After sending the message, he noticed something funny in his inbox.
He looked at the message he sent to Chan and Vernon, [She’s here. She’s so pretty. Wish me luck.] It took him a few seconds to understand that he sent it to Lalai's group chat instead of the maknae's.
Jeonghan: [Who’s there?]
Joshua: [Where are you going?]
Wonwoo: [Are you on a date?]
Seokmin: [Are you on a date? (2)]
Mingyu: [Are you on a date? (3)]
Minghao: [Please tell me you wore something nice other than a t-shirt]
Seungcheol: [I’m guessing you told Vernon and Chan?]
Vernon: [Yes, he told us.]
Chan: [Yup. He’s nervous AF.]
Soonyoung: [I can tell.]
Jihoon: [He’ll flip when he realizes this is not the maknae gc.]
Jun: [You owe us explanations later, dongsaeng.]
There were a lot more, speculating if they were already home, or if they’re still out on their date, or if Seungkwan was still breathing okay.
He laughed at his mistake, but then again, he would still tell his hyungs about everything. So he just typed.
[Hahaha! Error on my end. Sorry, my message was supposed to be for Vernon and Chan only. But I guess it’s fine. I’d be telling you all soon anyway. But for now, I guess we could stick to the basics. I went out on a date. It went great. She’s amazing, and I’m happy about all of it. I just dropped her back at her place a while ago and I just got in to my house. So I might be falling asleep soon… Family dinner sometime?]
His hyungs all responded with a resounding yes to his invite to have a family dinner soon, and Seungkwan smiled. He can’t wait to introduce Ha Eun to all of them.
——-
Two months into their relationship, Seungkwan finally got the chance to go out on a picnic with Ha Eun and Theo. The latter who was sulking about why it took so long for his hyung to play with him. Ha Eun and Seungkwan both had to explain about idol’s schedules and what are the things they have to do during weekdays and weekends, and when they go overseas.
‘That’s too busy. How do you have time to do the fun things?’ Theo asked the two adults.
‘Well, we find time.’ Ha Eun said.
‘Like right now,’ Seungkwan added.
Theo seemed satisfied with the answer and picked up the bubble wand that Seungkwan bought for him. He ran around their picnic mat, blowing bubbles and yelling in delight.
The adults looked at him in a manner of parents admiring their child.
‘Your family looks lovely,’ an elderly woman said in a kind and sweet voice. ‘That child will grow up loved and happy with you to as his parents.’ She walked off before the two of them were able to correct her.
‘Halmeoni…’ Ha Eun’s voice trailed off, exasperated that she wasn’t able to correct her.
Seungkwan looked at her instead, imagining how Ha Eun would be as a mother… how they would be as parents together and taking care of their children. He smiled broadly at the thought.
‘Why are you smiling like that?’ Ha Eun inquired.
‘I love you.’ Seungkwan’s voice was quiet but steady. Ha Eun blushed at his words but smiled back at him.
‘I love you, too, Kwannie,’ Ha Eun responded. She closed the gap between the two of them and kissed him firmly on the cheek.
‘You two look like my mom and dad,’ Theo looked at them with a wide grin. Seungkwan yelled as he stood up and chased Theo around their picnic mat, while Ha Eun took her phone and took lots of photos and videos of the two.
A few more minutes and Seungkwan and Theo decided to wage a tickle war with Ha Eun. She leapt up and ran away from the newly formed alliance, but she was defeated when Seungkwan got ahold of her hand and pulled her back. She toppled over Seungkwan, and Theo jumped in on top of her to tickle her. Their space in the park filled with so much laughter and joy, the nearby families also giggled with them.
They all sat up, breathless from the tickle war, and Seungkwan pulled back Ha Eun to lean on him. She obliged, wrapping her arms around his waist and closed her eyes as he peppered her forehead with lots of kissed. Theo crawled into their space and demanded that he be included in the warm embrace of the two adults.
‘Thanks for being brave and strong,’ Ha Eun whispered to Seungkwan.
‘Thank you for making me brave and strong,’ Seungkwan whispered back.
EPILOGUE
‘Seungkwan,’ Jihoon and Vernon called him at the same time. It was Seungkwan's first major concert at an arena in Seoul. He was overwhelmed by the number of fans who were there to watch and support him.
‘Your microphone is adjusted like we talked about during the first set. Don’t put it too close to your mouth,’ Jihoon reminded him.
‘Remember that you changed the lyrics to your next song. From ‘You are a shining star’ to ‘You are MY shining star,’ Vernon said, half hoping that Seungkwan would remember.
‘Can you please not badger the poor boy? He just got off the stage, and he needs to change his costume,’ Soonyoung pushed him to the dressing area where costume directors were already holding their hands out to help him change.
Seungkwan hastily changed his clothes and sat quickly for a touch up of his make up.
‘Drink some water before you go back up,’ Ha Eun offered a bottled water to Seungkwan. He took a sip and smiled at Ha Eun, taking her hand and stroking the back of it with his thumb.
‘Thanks for being here,’ Seungkwan said.
‘Hey, I promised you, right? Twenty years ago.’ Ha Eun waited for Seungkwan to stand up, and move closer to her. ‘I promised you that if you be brave and strong, and you succeed in becoming an idol, I’ll be here all the way in the front, cheering for you.’ Ha Eun smiled at him, beaming with pride for her boyfriend.
Seungkwan warmly hugged her and kissed her on the forehead before he lets go. ‘I love you, Ha Eun.’
‘I love you, Seungkwan.’ Ha Eun moved back as Seungkwan moved forward to the stage.
Seungkwan turned to her one more time and waved his hands over his head entusiastically, mouthing the words ‘see you later’ to Ha Eun.
-end-