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“Alhaitham, are you superstitious?”
Kaveh lay on his lap, stretching his legs to cover the rest of the divan. It was a silly question, one he already knew the answer to, but there was really no harm in asking; he never had before. It had been a few months since they finally decided to stop bickering over the smallest things, just to get the other’s attention and sharing lingering stares that made each other burn with want, all the while a thick air of confusion and even frustration hung over their heads, in between them, clouding their lungs and their minds like smoke.
They had traded the ambiguity for something stronger, newer, more secure. Sure, at times it felt daunting, Kaveh especially felt like he had a little—a lot—more to live up to as Alhaitham’s boyfriend—let alone his first. But it came with unbridled, unmasked affection, shameless “I love you”s and that little gleam in his lover’s eye he would sometimes catch before, but now it seemed that was the only way Alhaitham was capable of looking at him. A gentle hand carding through his hair brought him back to reality, Kaveh watching up at Alhaitham’s slightly puzzled expression as he set his book down.
“Hm. I wouldn’t say so. My grandmother was, to a degree, but I find no value in them, nor reason to believe in them.” Kaveh chuckled at this, because of course he wouldn’t. Alhaitham, the most rational man in Teyvat, possibly in history, would have never seriously answered yes to that question. “Why? Are you?” He cupped Kaveh’s cheeks and squeezed, ever so slightly.
“A little bit, maybe. Most of them, I find completely nonsensical. But others, the more… how can I phrase it? Harmless? Playful, perhaps? Those, I’d like to think, are just a little true. Or maybe just comforting. Does that make sense?” Kaveh looked back up at the man, fully expecting a pensive demeanor about him, his eyes on a figure in space, one not even he could see. But Alhaitham just gazed back at him, with that same loving glint in his eyes.
“It is common to ascribe meaning to a comforting or precious belief, I’ll agree with you on that. Which are the few you ‘half-believe’ in?” His words were so gentle . Kaveh had to wait a moment to collect himself before responding.
“Well, um… the first one would be walking under ladders. Just out of pure caution, and possibly from experience, I would never. That killing a ladybug brings bad luck… I don’t completely believe that it brings bad luck, but just killing one in general seems unnecessary.”
It was also because ladybugs were among his father’s favorite insects. He saw him in each one, crawling on a log, resting on a vine; those that landed on his fingers would get him a little misty-eyed on some days when he felt a little fragile. Shaken up after a nightmare, now that he could finally dream, a client nearly harassing him over the most minute details, pulling all-nighters… however, those were usually met with Alhaitham’s prepared blankets, neatly rolled up blueprints, and glasses of water for Kaveh to drink in the morning.
“And there is another, but it’s a little silly.”
“I want to hear it,” Alhaitham said almost immediately before switching his tone to something… less eager. “I mean, I wouldn’t judge if you told me. So far, the ones you’ve listed are reasonable. What is it about this one?”
“It’s, well… a little more… intimate? If you can even call it that,” Kaveh hesitated, even though he knew Alhaitham would never judge him for such a thing, even without him saying so.
“My mother told me this when I was younger, and it sort of stuck,” the scribe nodded for him to continue, and Kaveh sighed softly. “Well, she believed that your moles and birthmarks are places where a lover kissed you in a past life,” Kaveh’s cheeks reddened, seemingly for no reason, he thought, and the thought of that only embarrassed him further. “Is that stupid?” Alhaitham seemed a little taken aback by Kaveh’s reaction to his own words.
“My grandmother told me that too. And she would kiss me here and there after she told me,” he pointed to a freckle above his left eyebrow and another just to the right of his upper lip. “She also believed in the qualities of said placements. According to her, the one above my eyebrow meant I’m ambitious and I have a good intuition, and the one near my mouth told her I was going to be a flirt,” Kaveh snorted slightly at the second meaning, making Alhaitham frown slightly. “Well, I didn’t believe that one either. But I’ve kept note of her meanings. Those two were birthmarks; the other few on my face and body were a result of sun exposure. But I’ve wondered if it ever meant anything. Of course, after a while, I decided it was just superstition. But now that you bring it up,” Alhaitham leaned down and kissed the mole under Kaveh’s left eye, a small symbol of his vibrant personality and sociability, he remembered. “Maybe she was a little right.”
He was a little stunned by this answer, not taking Alhaitham as one to forgo logic in any situation. But he was different when it came to Kaveh. He was foolish and anxious and unsure around him. His hands, though strong and gentle, seemed to hesitate in certain situations. Maybe it was a lack of experience. Maybe it was a bit of fear of messing something up. Fear of judgement, faltering, whatever the case was. But Kaveh did not take this lightly. He knew the value of Alhaitham’s trust, cradling it protectively and carefully, making sure to reassure him that he was safe, that he was doing well, and most importantly, that Kaveh loved him. He loved him so very much.
He raised his hands up to caress his lover’s cheek with one hand, the other slightly tugging down at his bottom lip. Alhaitham wasted no time and shifted down onto his side, kissing Kaveh tenderly. Their hands cupped one another’s cheeks, twirled the other’s hair. Alhaitham brought one hand down to drag the collar of Kaveh’s—already low cut—shirt to the side, breaking away so he could kiss and suck at the constellations of moles and freckles on his shoulder.
Kaveh imagined him in a past life—for whom else would he have loved?—as Alhaitham held him like he was breakable, kissing and marking the dappled expanse of his skin.
His silvery hair glinted in the soft light from the lamp Kaveh bought to shut Alhaitham up about it. Sure, it was uglier than one could imagine, but Alhaitham liked it. Said something about how out of place it looked, and how he liked it because of that. Something about how Kaveh, too, stood out like a ruby, shining and precious against the otherwise dull and homogeneous crowd, embedded into his mind. “Oh, whatever. Will I shut you up if I buy it?” Alhaitham gave him a smug smile, making Kaveh scoff, but he knew he meant every word he said.
“What are you thinking about, ya hayati?” Alhaitham kissed his chin, breaking Kaveh’s trance—he hadn’t realized he had been staring at his lover since he started kissing him. “You’ve been so quiet, I… was worried you didn’t want me to continue.” Alhaitham never worried. Ever . Kaveh smiled and kissed the birthmark above his eyebrow.
“You’re so… I don’t even know,” Alhaitham laughed quietly and kept kissing Kaveh’s chest. “Ugh. You’re the one who’s good with words, don’t give me crap for that.” He threaded his fingers through Alhaitham’s hair, braiding a few strands with one hand, and absentmindedly tucking a piece behind his ear with the other, eyeing the golden dust motes that seemed to float around his lover like a halo.
“I love you, Kaveh.” the words still made his heart jump. “You know, I’ve reconsidered; I think the superstition is just that: a superstition.” Kaveh’s eyes focused back onto Alhaitham, awe flickering across them for a moment.
“How do you know?”
“Well, if we really were lovers in the past, there would be far more freckles all over you,” He reddened at the words, as did Alhaitham, ever so slightly. “Don’t you think so?” Kaveh hesitated, taken aback. He scoured his mind for what felt like minutes, looking for the perfect witty comeback. All he could come up with was:
“Give me more. Uh- for the next life, I mean,” his mind stuttered along with his mouth, scrambling for his next words. “So I can find you again. Who knows, maybe you’ll recognize them, by some miracle.” Alhaitham gave him an inscrutable look, somewhere between shock, intrigue, and a burning longing. Maybe he was just trying to get Kaveh to back down. “You don’t have to, I was just-“
“I would love to,” Alhaitham pressed a soft, chaste kiss to his lips, wasting no time. “You deserve nothing less.” Kaveh’s eyes nearly welled up at the gentle words, lifting himself up and steadying himself on his elbows. He watched as Alhaitham scooted to the edge of the divan to focus on Kaveh’s ankles, tenderly kissing the bone just above his heel. Kaveh relaxed as he watched him continue up his leg, kissing his calves and knees through the fabric of his trousers.
Alhaitham paused just before his thighs, much to their shared dismay.
“What are- oh,” Alhaitham was staring pointedly at the waistband of his trousers, slightly frowning. “You can take them off, love.” Alhaitham sure perked up at that .
“Really? I mean-” he looked away, seeming embarrassed at his eagerness, “Are you sure? I don’t want you to feel obligated.” What?
“Are you being intentionally dense?”
“…huh?”
“Darling, we’ve been dating for a little while, I practically asked you to do it!”
“You did?” Alhaitham seemed a little confused. Oh, right. Sometimes Alhaitham couldn’t tell if Kaveh was being genuine or not.
“I implied it, but I forgot that my tone isn’t always the easiest to read, I’m sorry. But yes, and not to mention we already, um…” he cleared his throat.
“We what?” Alhaitham smirked as he rested his chin on his—fully clothed—thighs. “No, really, we what?” he giggled.
“We nothing unless you stop fooling around!” Kaveh couldn’t help but smile and swat at Alhaitham’s shoulder.
“Alright. Lift your hips, please.” In an instant, his pants were around his ankles. He repositioned himself as he kicked them off, tugging on the waistband of his—absolutely soaked—underwear.
“Why didn’t you-“
“Later, ya hayati, I promise. Just relax, won’t you?” His hands ghosted over Kaveh’s thighs, sending shivers up and down his spine. “There you go, good boy, Kaveh.”
The nickname, the way the sweet words dripped from his lips like honey, it took everything in Kaveh not to come undone in that moment. He watched Alhaitham spread his legs apart, gently kneading the soft pudge as he kissed his way closer to his inner thigh. Kaveh used to be so anxious about being naked in front of Alhaitham. He was a perfectly healthy man, just a little curvy around the edges.
But what would he think of me? He’s never brought up my body before, granted, he hasn’t really seen it. Before their first time together, Kaveh had mentioned it, slightly—incredibly, more than he’d like to admit—embarrassed as he stopped Alhaitham’s hands from taking off his shirt. ‘I promise you, habibi, whatever I see won’t change anything. You will always be beautiful to me, no matter how you look.’ He then proceeded to strip Kaveh bare and—lovingly—fuck him senseless, not once hesitating to compliment the way his ass and thighs looked when they jiggled. Freak . The point was, Alhaitham didn’t care. He loved every inch of Kaveh’s body and always made sure to make that clear to him.
So when Alhaitham sucked and kissed and licked all over his thighs, a small part of him felt the love and intent in each one. Though that was quickly overpowered by heat and pleasure and drowned out by Kaveh’s whimpered pleas for more. He couldn’t take the waiting anymore. He needed Alhaitham’s mouth on his cock and his tongue deep in his cunt. His hips bucked as he whined; he was getting desperate for attention.
“Impatient, aren’t we?” Alhaitham hummed amusedly and focused his attention to the glistening wet spot on Kaveh’s boxers. “I suppose it’s time I give you what you want.” He buried his face in the fabric, taking in the warmth and slight musk—Kaveh thought he could hear a muffled fuck coming from him, but he wasn’t sure. He mouthed at his crotch and nosed at his clit, Kaveh’s slick making the thin cotton cling to his body and nearly expose him without taking off his—already a little see-through—underwear. The curve of the bridge and the slight hook on the tip made Kaveh gasp and tangle his fingers in Alhaitham’s hair as he began to needily hump his face. But his boyfriend, ever the buzzkill, firmly held his hips in place.
“If you’re not going to do it for me,” he tried to sound upset, but the words came out whiny and high-pitched, “Then at least have the decency to let me satisfy myself!” Alhaitham hummed and kitten-licked at the thin fabric, making Kaveh squirm.
“Alright, alright,” he tugged at the waistband, “You’ve made yourself clear, my love.” Just as he began pulling them down, Kaveh nearly tore them off and threw them onto the floor.
“You’re an evil man, Alhaitham.” He pouted and tugged at his hair. But Alhaitham didn’t seem to be affected at all. No, he was too busy gazing at the sight in front of him.
“Gods, you’re divine, Kaveh…” They both reddened, and Kaveh looked away bashfully.
“Just… fuck, just…. hurry up.” His attention was pulled back to Alhaitham as he wordlessly and dutifully slid his tongue up between his folds and around his cock, sucking hard as Kaveh’s thighs tensed. The feeling made him shiver and moan softly. “More, more, please .”
Alhaitham nodded and got to work. His tongue moved languidly over his hole, lapping up his slick while Kaveh struggled to control his volume. He could feel Alhaitham’s tongue just barely inching its way into him before pulling away to wrap around his cock instead. It wasn’t enough. It was too much . He desperately pulled Alhaitham impossibly closer by his hair, holding him there as if any space between them would rip them apart. Alhaitham groaned softly as he savored every drop of Kaveh’s essence—he refused to pull away, even as his lover trembled beneath his mouth, as if he were latched onto him.
“Haitham, Haitham - too much, ‘m gonna- Ah!” He barely managed to keep his composure, considering forgoing it entirely and cry out the lovely obscenities that bounced around his mind. But Alhaitham didn’t stop or pull away to tease him with his words instead of his—maddeningly adept—tongue.
Instead, he roughly shoved his fingers into Kaveh’s cunt and focused his mouth on eating Kaveh out like he was his first meal in weeks . As if he were starving, Alhaitham messily slurped and devoured him to the bone. His fingers rubbed and flicked Kaveh’s walls, making sure to thrust into his most sensitive spots. Kaveh finally lost it when he could feel Alhaitham’s teeth grazing against his clit, coming hard onto his lover’s face. He tugged hard on the silvery locks, regretting it slightly when he realized just how hard he was pulling them, and reddening at how wet and messy he had probably made Alhaitham. But Alhaitham didn’t care. He was too busy rubbing inside his cunt with all the love and sweetness of a saint, while still greedily lapping up his come and almost growling for it like a feral animal.
“Oh, fuck, joonam… fuck , you’re so good, feels so good, mm , Haitham…” he moaned, running his fingers through Alhaitham’s hair and grinding on his face. He brought his fingers to his lips and kissed them before patting them on Alhaitham’s cheek. “Come here… wanna kiss you, Haitham- oh! ” He suddenly sucked hard on Kaveh’s cock before pushing his fingers impossibly deeper as he got up to kiss Kaveh.
The kiss was searingly hot—burning away every shred of embarrassment, every notion of imperfection, every thought in Kaveh’s mind until all he could think about was how good he felt. Alhaitham’s fingers were gentle, his lips warm and tasted like him mixed with Alhaitham’s sweet spit that still faintly tasted of peaches and honey. He pulled away slowly, leaving Kaveh a gasping mess underneath him.
“I will recognize you in the next life. In every life, I’m sure of it. If not by looks, then by taste.” Kaveh whimpered needily and kept grinding on his fingers, tilting his head back and whining softly when he felt Alhaitham’s fingers drag against his walls as they slid out.
“More kisses… give me- please ,” he shivered as Alhaitham straddled him and leaned over him, “Please, Haitham…” Alhaitham hummed and kissed him again, slower and more controlled. Kaveh almost despised it.
“Of course, my darling.” Kaveh kissed him back hungrily, almost with the same passion as Alhaitham just moments ago. Their tastes mingling on his tongue was maddeningly addictive, to say the least.
“Your fingers, I want-” he stuck his tongue out and moaned, inviting Alhaitham to stuff his mouth with his slick, calloused fingers. And who was he to decline? Alhaitham dutifully rubbed his tongue as Kaveh closed his mouth around him, sighing softly. He went back to marking Kaveh’s body—licking and kissing up his happy trail and the stretch marks on his hips. He rested his hand on Kaveh’s ass, squeezing and kneading.
“Habibati aljamila,” Alhaitham bit down on his hip, making Kaveh sputter and choke on his fingers, “How I worship you, my love.” He trailed his kisses up to the crescent scars under Kaveh’s pectorals before pulling his fingers from his lips.
“I love you, I love you, Haitham, so much.” He gasped softly as he watched Alhaitham’s warm teal-and-amber gaze focus on him, filled with adoration.
“I love you too, Kaveh, more than words could ever express.” Alhaitham tenderly kissed his shoulder and held his hand, running his thumb over Kaveh’s knuckles. He kissed down one arm, then the other, finishing both by kissing each fingertip.
“Azizam?” Alhaitham looked up at him. “Come kiss me.” Neither of them wasted any time. In an instant, Alhaitham was on top of Kaveh, holding onto his shoulders as Kaveh wrapped his arms around his neck. They kissed slowly and passionately, neither were able to part for a moment too long. Kaveh ran his hands over the muscles of Alhaitham’s shoulders and back, tracing each curve and dip. After what felt like hours, Kaveh pulled away, leaving Alhaitham gasping and panting softly.
“You know, I still have kisses to give you,” he whispered and nudged the bulge in Alhaitham’s pants with his thigh, making him whimper and blush, “And I should probably take care of that, too…” Alhaitham tucked a few loose strands of hair behind his ear, kissing a mole on Kaveh’s chin.
“Anything you want, my love.” He smiled softly, making Kaveh’s heart and stomach flutter like it did when they were students and Alhaitham had asked to study together after classes.
“Well. You don’t have to be so… ugh. You know what, I’m done with you!” He playfully swatted Alhaitham’s hand away as they both giggled and pulled him down into an embrace, settling once again into a blissful silence.
They lay chest to chest, heartbeat to heartbeat, for what felt like an hour. Kaveh ran his fingers over Alhaitham’s sides, tracing and massaging the scars on his back. Alhaitham ran a hand through Kaveh’s hair, braiding a few strands absentmindedly. Both of them so badly wished to stay in that moment forever, wanting to fuse together even if just for a moment, to love each other even further than skin-deep, their essences inextricably tangled together. For a moment, they could feel it in their bones. Slowly, Alhaitham wrapped his arms around Kaveh and stood up, carrying him to their room.
His arms circled him so gently, so protectively, he could feel the I love you in his embrace—neither of them needed to say it. Even while they laughed and cuddled and kissed on their bed, warming up to a second round, they could feel it—their souls were always meant to be together, no matter the situation. They could feel fate pulling them towards each other like an invisible string pulled taut and wrapped around them both. They hoped, prayed that they could find each other again in every life to come—but for now, they were preparing, marking their bodies with eager bites and kisses, hoping to recognize each other in the next life, and be pulled together again.