Keep the Butler in the Fridge

by Werwolf55668

Summary:

Dwayne Dantes gives a lecture to his two new students.

They didn't really want to be his students - he found them on the street when he was taking a stroll and decided they should get a lecture in case they decided to become tycoons in the future.

(Someone has to tell him he should not try to teach these things to homeless people.)

Notes:

This was not my idea. Not entirely, anyway.
...
Do not take this seriously. Absolutely do not.

Chapter 1

Dwayne: I usually keep my butler in the fridge. It doesn't matter who becomes my butler, or how often I change them - which I can do almost anytime, now that I think about it. When I keep them in the fridge, it helps to keep them fresh. And when I need to hide them, the fridge is also the best option.

Student#1: What is a fridge?

Dwayne: Oh, sorry, you have no way of knowing that. It is a... a machine from my times - referring to the Era before the Firsh Epoch - which can help you keep food cold and fresh for extended periods of time.

Student#2: A time before the First Epoch... you're that old?

Student#1: You put people inside of these machinese!?

Dwayne: No, and yes. And they're not really people anymore. They're dead. They have to be, in order to be my marionettes. It's true that the marionettes don't spoil, but I feel better when I know they're in the fridge - fresh and good to act as my butlers.

Student#1: You monster.

Dwayne: No, I'm not from the Monster Pathway, I'm from the Seer Pathway.

Student#2: How did you even get your hands on something from before the Epochs? That machine couldn't have survived that long, could it?

Dwayne: I simply summoned its Historical Projection. It's not that hard to do.

Student#1: I can't do this anymore. I'm leaving. This lecture on how to become a tycoon involves too many illegal things.

Dwayne: Alright. And if you change your mind, remember - if you get yourself a butler, always keep him in the fridge!

Student #1:  (Runs away)

Student#2: So, do we continue? I'm really interested in the rest of your secret.

Dwayne: Of course, of course. The first step is to become a pirate hunter-

Student#2: A pirate hunter?

Dwayne: Yes, a pirate hunter. Where do you think all my money came from?

Student#2: ...

Dwayne: Then, you pretend to be a tycoon. You'll have enough money to-

Student#2: I think you misunderstood. I wanted to know how to make a marionette for myself and summon a Historical Projection of a fridge so I have a place to keep my butlers.

Dwayne: (Proud of his student): Very well. The first thing you need to do is...

 

*History says the lecture continued for another three days. The student didn't make it. Dwayne continued explaining anyway.  It was a sort of therapy for him.

★

✯

☆

.