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is it bad you didn't hate yourself for wanting to fuck your elder brother?
according to the one time you showed an inkling of intrigue towards incest you were met with a reaction so repulsive it scared you so much that you doubted yourself for weeks. bringing up the topic to your friends in the form of "a popular hentai trope" caused an uproar of disgust and utter denial and hatred. you guys never talked about it again.
on forums though, it was another story. some seemed to be into it, unashamedly. but most made fun of them or outright hated them.
was it so bad to love your brother? to think about him all the time? in the morning, during transportation, at school, with friends, during sports, while showering, before bed.... you sighed. and you hadn't even started on the need, the visceral yearning and utter desire to connect with him at a level higher than what you see in romcom movies. a spiritual connection. a mind, body and soul binding.
you were shook out of your thoughts when your teacher called out your name rather aggressively, asked you a question and you very obviously couldn't answer it. the class ended with your classmates laughing at you. you were too tired to care about it.
on your way back home, you stopped at a convenience store with your friends. they picked up stuff for themselves and so did you. but you also picked up a few things your brother liked to eat. and stuff he is running low on. like razor blades, hair gel and his socks which get ripped way too often.
when your friends asked about the odd set of items in your basket, you just shrugged and said it was for your ni-chan. it was followed by a cacophony of awwws and you're such a good sister.
the first thing you did after stepping foot in the house was look for shinichiro. usually he is back home by now. what after your school, kumon and hangout with friends he better be.
"shin-ni," you exhaled a breath you didn't know you were holding. you had wrapped your arms around his torso as your chest pressed into his hard, muscular back. he was doing the laundry. something you should have done yesterday, but couldn't because of a test today. and he didn't utter a word, didn't complain once or show disappointment. he understood, just like that. and took the role without a fuss. he cared for you so much.
he exhaled a chuckle in return, "welcome back, my princess." ah, how that term of endearment makes you go crazy inside. sometimes in your gut, sometimes lower.
"missed you." your voice was muffled with your face pressed into his back and the pout you were holding.
he holds your hand in his and brings it to his lips. he leaves a kiss there but doesn't budge, instead keeps them pressed against his lips for a few more seconds. then says, "i missed you too, (name)."
of course he did. still doesn't make you any less giddy. especially with the way he says your name. "dinner?" he asks and you kiss his back in return. he laughs and turns around to face you.
the smile on his face makes your heart race and your pupils dilate. "i take that as a yes?"
i wanna eat you. you thought to yourself. but nodded to him because life is nothing like the things that your brain conjures up.
---
shin loved to hold you, close to him, in a cuddle, whenever you two were home alone and in the mood to watch a movie. head to his chest, wrapped in his arms, basking in his warmth. it was bliss.
you wanted to reach up and kiss him. kiss him, make out with him, straddle him and then take his dick like a cowgirl.
shin boops your nose, "the screen is that way silly."
i know. you want to say. i find you more interesting.
but chuckle in response. you would have been sad if not for the fact that shin was doing the exact same thing too. you are glad he can't see your face and your smile.
"i'll go get more popcorns." you get up to go to the kitchen, wanting some room to breathe. but shin catches a hold of your hand immediately and pulls you towards him making you tumble onto him.
you gasp in surprise but shin catches you of course. you look at him, now even closer as you sit on his lap, on his crotch eye to eye with your older brother.
"where do you think you are going, hm?" shin chuckles and you giggle im return. he tickles you and you ask him to stop all the while laughing your ass out. shin doesn't budge and it gets harder to breathe but it is so fun. it wouldn't have been if it was anyone else.
when he finally stops you both are hot in the face. just recovering from your laughing session with fits of chuckles in between. the movie is long forgotten. it wasn't something new either, same old shit you have watched ten times by now. as a movie enthusiast, it didn't bother you. shin knew.
---
it's a saturday. you have been home all day. naturally you had the duty to take care of the house and you took on that role in a stride. doing necessary and beyond to achieve a praise from shin when he comes home. and well, of course because you are a responsible person, but that's a boring reason.
so when it's 11 p.m., everyone else have fallen asleep an hour or two ago after telling you that you don't have to worry because shin is probably out with his friends and it's all good because he is a gang member, and shin is still not home; you naturally grow worried. that's unlike shin. and despite your obsession with him, it's only natural to be so worried about your big brother. right?
the clicking of keys shakes you out of your overthinking session. and you pad your way down the stairs. before you can open the door for him, shin is already inside. right below the stairs. it's so dark you can barely make out anything. but you quickly catch into the difference in the mood.
usually even if he is tired he always smiles at you. gives you a forehead kiss, a hair ruffle, a pat on the head, anything. but tonight he just gives you his bag and goes straight to the bathroom. he locks the door and you don't see him for another hour.
shin and you love each other sooo much. you were always soooo close together. you both always want to be together! this was our dream plan! you two always use to talk about this. how you are going to live with each other and be with each other forever.
shin is your go-to person, when you're happy or sad, when you need advice or when you just want company. and he is so cool and fun and hilarious and smart and knowledge and responsible, you look up to him. always wanting to be like him.
so with this level of intimacy and co-dependency, it was obvious why even the slightest bit of mood shift would become a cause of concern for you.
you shook your head, grounding yourself. this wasn't the time to lose yourself in your thoughts and feed you stupid wrong emotions. it was fine, shin was fine. he wasn't a baby. he can take care of himself. he knows best for himself. repeating these thoughts in your head, you fell asleep.
had it been a one time thing it would have been fine. but shin has been coming home like this for a few days now. late, too tired to talk, moody, quiet, reclusive. and you don't understand what's going on!
grandpa has decided to let him be. he is a "man now" afterall. whatever that means. so tonight when he comes home late again, you stop him in his tracks before he can go to his little sanctuary he is made out of the bathroom.
"shin-ni, what's going on with you?" you ask. "please tell me. maybe i can help. i'm worried sick, you know?"
and shin's resolve crumbles. how could it not? when he is sweet sweet, cutest, most adorable little sister looks up at him like this? worried, concerned, eyebrows furrowed, big eyes wide, soft hands holding onto his forearm. they can't even wrap around them.
"(name)," he exhales a deep, long sigh. unable to say anything else at the moment with the array of conflicting emotions, thoughts and concerns floating around in his brain and that too with a long day of grueling hard work.
shin's head falls on your shoulder. and he wraps his arms around you. his body feels limp on you. it's heavy, strong. and it makes you feel something. you decide to shoo it away, for now at least.
you don't say anything either. instead let him hug his way through his emotions. if that's what helps, then so be it. you will give him what he wants. you will give him the world, he need only ask.
---
an hour goes by. shin is in the bathroom again. and you are running in and out of sleep. it's annoying. but not enough to fully wake you up just yet.
it's finally when you are drifting to sleep for good when the door clicks open. it's so soft it doesn't wake you. not even when your bed dips and a big, warm figure presses onto your back. instead of waking you up in alarm, it does the opposite and soothes you into slumber. because you don't have to wake up and turn around to know who it is. it's shin, of course. you know his body and his warmth like the back of your hand. it's safe and it makes you sleepy.
if only you didn't feel a poke in your ass cheeks and a rutting which was anything but rhythmic. chaotic, scattered, disarrayed, needy. horny.
you are wide awake now. eyes flash open. your heart is in your throat. your stomach churns aggressively. nervousness gives way to adrenaline.
it's happening. is it happening?
"(name)~"
it was most definitely a moan. it. is. happening. fuck!
just when you were least prepared. unshaven or trimmed. hadn't bathed the whole day because you were tired as fuck from all the workload of school and tuition. forgot to deal with the annoying moustache growing on your upper lips.
"holy shit-" shin grunts and you can practically feel how big it is. it's a grower. as if it wasn't a shower. you had seen it hanging down his legs when he woke up early in the morning and your shit ass sleep schedule made you also awake at the ass crack of dawn.
"shin-ni?" it's quiet all of a sudden. no movement. the rutting has stopped. no more silent grunts or groans escaping pathetic attempts of being held back.
you try to turn around but shin's strong arms don't let you. "hey-"
"don't." shin wants to skin himself alive, cut his body into pieces, disperse them somewhere and burn himself so that no one can find his body.
god damn. just what did he do? did he just grind his cock into his fucking step sister's ass? did he just let his emotions control him so much that he couldn't think straight and technically assaulted the person he sworn to protect from others like that?
there was no redemption. this is it. he doesn't know what to do now. but he can't face her. not now, not ever. he is a failure as a person, as a guy, as an elder brother, as a-
"why did you stop?" your words make his eyes blow wide open. his breath hitches in his throat. what?
"shin-ni, a little to the left. i liked it." he can hear the grin in your voice. the slight mischief mixed with anticipation.
while you are shameless in your dirtiness, shin is equally as afraid of shame in his filthiness.
you press your ass against his dick. "it's about time."
it's effortless and fucking hot the way shin flips you over. he sits on your bed and you sit up too. "what did you just say?!"
you crawl on your knees and bring your hand up to his chest- pecs. you look up at him. "i said it's about time, don't you think?"
your eyes fall into his lap. he is only in a pair of sweatpants that much is obvious. and it's hard hard. your pussy throbs.
you hold his face and kiss his forehead.
"it's okay, okay? i want to do this. i have been dying to do this. the number of nights i have fantasized about this is embarrassing." you look down, shy.
shin's eyes are on you the entire time and with the pitch blackness of them, the gaze is even more intense.
"i have seen how stressed you have been lately. i love you so much, you know that right? please let me help you. i can't see my brother like this.”
"you want this?" his voice is raw, deep and heavy. and it takes you by surprise. you nod.
"holy shit. you want this. i can't believe, you want this." he chuckles but it's more of an unbelievable one than a cheery one.
"kiss me first, (name). that's what i have always wanted. your lips on my lips. slow and steady. and then deep and hazy." your lips are already parted at the choice of words so it wasn't difficult for him to slot his lips against yours.
his lips are soft. and so they cushion the kiss. the kiss is soft too. eyes closed. it's a peck first. then your lips start to move. in and out. slow suction, gentle and easy. for his little sister. you want to laugh, he really doesn't know you like that, does he? no worries, you have all the time in the world now.
when you part lips, exhaling air and inhaling even more, your eyes are on each other's lips. pretty shades of darker hue, a bit swollen and looking delectable. so you kiss again, and again and again and one more time.
you giggle. "let me give you something more shin-ni. something that might help.”
his face was already so red. you wanted to see how much more red you can make it be.
so you move down again. you are on the floor, on your knees while he has his legs spread and his cock hard. he had taken his pants down for you.
you hold the underside first. he shivers. then you run the tip your finger all the way from the tip of his vein to the base. he winces to over stimulation, eyes closing shut. to understand what he likes best, your eyes don't leave his face once.
but God is it turning you on as well.
you massage his thighs first, releasing the tension. "relax."
then you bring your face in between his legs. his mind goes blank. his step sister is between his legs. his sister is between his legs.
it is as weird as it is wrong. but he is no saint. he can't lie. he knows how he has gotten off multiple times to the thought of this. it started with having thoughts of you whenever he used to masterbate. he was confused and taken aback. but then when it happened everytime, when his brain provided the images of his sister anytime he wanted to imagine someone hot, he accepted it. it is what it is.
repressed desire, repressed hunger. it has always been there, but he can't control it anymore. he is a man afterall.
he is still unsure and a little scared. but then, then you look up at him. familiar eyes; the comfort and security he felt as soon as those eyes looked up at him short circuited his brain.
you move your lips and kissed the inside of his smooth thighs. soft, gentle little butterfly kisses on the inside of his thighs. he felt like he would start crying this very moment. all the emotions that he had been holding at bay would come crashing down any moment now. and he was scared. as perceptive as you were to your brother, you quickly said. "it's alright, ni-chan. you can cry. there's no one to judge you here. i love you, remember? this is for you.”
with how much love he could feel through those eyes, through those lips, through that gentle touch. he knew no one could love him as much as you did. no one ever had. it was such a sweet gesture. his sister was willing to take him in her mouth, just to relieve his stress.
"princess," he breathes. "come here.”
you comply. you raise yourself, still kneeling in between his legs. he lowers his head and holds your face. "i love you so much."
"i love you too." you reply as you smile up at him. it makes him feel warm throughout his body, mind and soul.
he leans down further as you raise your neck higher and you kiss. you continue what you started then. you lick right below his head first. shin swears he sees stars. then you apply firm pressure on that part and swirl your saliva around that area. with your other hand you play with his balls. then slowly, you take him in his mouth. up and down you bob your head. it's a filthy noise that fills the room. definitely not something a brother and sister should sound like when alone in a room. but, oh well.
it starts to hurt at one point, if you are being honest. your jaw hurts and at times it gets a little hard to take him all in. but with how much turned on shin is, it doesn't take long for him to cum.
"angel, sweetheart. i'm about to cum, baby." his voice is high pitched, eyes squeezed shut and toes curling with his muscular calves stressed. he leans against his hands on your bed, face red as a tomato. maybe more so.
"come wherever you want shin-ni." you say as you take him out of your mouth with a pop.
"are you sure? i might come in your mouth, i-"
"do it."
and he does. he moans your name as he throws his head back. spurts after spurts of cum fill your mouth and you struggle to swallow it all but you do, gladly. it doesn't taste half as bad as what people make it out to be.
"holy fucking shit!" he exhales. after getting his bearings he helps you up. he makes you sit down on the bed and rubs your knees softly. "that was so fucking good."
you giggle. "you liked it? that's all i need."
“i loved it. loved it so much. it's the best thing ever. thank you so much.” shin pats your head, and adoring smile on his face.
"let me repay you back baby-"
"no, you are tired and exhausted. you need rest."
"no no, baby please-"
"nope! i am fine. don't worry. we can do it tomorrow if you want. but for now, please rest ni-chan."
shin kisses you on the mouth. "let me at least help you clean up."
you two are glad the washroom isn't far away from your room.