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“Are you absolutely sure you’re fine with this?”
“Hajime...” Komaeda smiles up at him from where he’s laying on the bed, hair splayed out beneath his head on the pillows. “I’m sure. You don’t need to keep asking me.”
“W-Well, I just,” Hinata takes a breath, fidgets with his tie, “this is…you know…”
“Um, I won’t lie and say it isn’t a strange request,” Komaeda admits, shifting against the bed. He slowly blinks, then shakes his head. “Ah, but…I really don’t mind. If it makes you feel good, then—”
“I-I don’t want you to agree for just that reason!” Hinata’s shoulders tense. “I want you to get…something out of this too, okay?”
“Well, it’ll be hard for me to get pleasure out of it, since I’ll be asleep,” Komaeda oh so helpfully points out, and Hinata feels his ears burn.
“M-Maybe, but…” He weakly tries to refute, but Komaeda interrupts him.
“However, I’m open to trying it, anyway. I might get something out of this I wouldn’t even know of otherwise.” One of Komaeda’s hands raise, making a lazy, circular motion before dropping back down. “I won’t know until I try, right? And…I want to try.” Then, he laughs. “Besides, I already took the sleeping medicine, so I’m kind of committed, aren’t I?”
“I guess…” Hinata rubs the back of his own neck. “You’re…comfortable, right? Are the pillows fine? It’s not too cold, or too hot or—”
“It’s fine,” Komaeda answers, and Hinata watches him stretch out his arms and legs before laying on his side. Then, his lips purse, and he goes back to laying on his back. “Ah, would you prefer me on my back, or on my side? Or, perhaps you’d rather me on my stomach?”
Hinata’s face flushes. He’s sure he’s never going to get used to how blunt Komaeda is with things like this. “U-Um, anything is fine…whatever’s most comfortable for you. I can…make it work…”
“Hmmm, okay.” Komaeda goes to lay on his side again, legs bending a bit to curl up. Hinata watches his eyelids begin to droop. In the background, their fan drones on—Komaeda can’t sleep when it’s silent, and the last thing Hinata wants is for him to be uncomfortable and rouse awake during this.
Hinata looks to the window. Though the curtains are drawn shut, a bit of moonlight still manages to shine through. Everyone else is probably in their cottages, blissfully unaware of what Hinata’s about to do. His heart beats a bit faster in his chest. If anyone walked in and saw what Hinata was about to do…they’d probably assume the worst. They’d probably kill him. At the very least, Hinata would die on his own of embarrassment.
He distracts himself by looking back down at Komaeda’s face. In perhaps one of the only times he will ever be even somewhat grateful for what those scientists did to his body, it’s easy to see the other in the dark. His eyes are barely open now, chest rising and falling with slow breaths. It always feels like such a privilege to see Komaeda like this—at peace, completely off guard. When he sees Komaeda smile a mindless, purely content smile, it makes the corners of his own lips twitch up. Without much thought, he leans over and puts a hand on Komaeda’s head, fingers threading through soft, curly hair. Komaeda’s eyes blink open, and Hinata hears a faint, “Mm?”
“Are you…getting tired?” Hinata asks, even though he already knows the answer. Komaeda scoffs, the hair in his face briefly floating up with his breath. His eyes crack open, a sleepy smirk on his face.
“Are you that impatient?” He replies, and Hinata feels heat creep up to the tips of his ears.
“Sh-Shut up. I just wanted to check in,” he dismisses, pulling his hand away. Komaeda has the audacity to whine about it, and before he even realizes, Hinata’s got his hand back in Komaeda’s hair, petting through it slow and gentle. It’s not long before Komaeda’s eyes are fluttering shut again, whatever retort he must have had apparently dying in his throat, and his breathing slows once more. This time, Hinata stays quiet. His lip is tightly pulled between his teeth, a mix of shame and arousal swirling together in his gut.
It’s almost like something out of a dream—or something out of Hinata’s fantasies, maybe. Komaeda, curled up beneath him, allowing him access when he’s in one of his most vulnerable states. Although, now that Hinata thinks on it, sex is also a vulnerable act, is it not? You lay bare before your partner, hoping and praying that they will accept you as you are—that they will not take advantage of the inherent vulnerability of being naked and around someone else. That, while being asleep…it’s a vulnerability wrapped in a vulnerability. Hinata suddenly wants to cry.
Though, Komaeda isn’t naked. Not yet. He’s still got his socks on, and he’s still got his boxers on, but that won’t be the case for long. When they were first talking about doing this, Komaeda had asked if Hinata wanted him to sleep naked, and Hinata had declined. More than anything, he wants to be the one to strip Komaeda himself. He wants to peel back the other’s layers like he has hundreds of times before, and he wants to take what’s inside.
Hinata’s hand stills on Komaeda’s head. Komaeda makes no protest. Hinata takes a deep breath. “...Komaeda?”
“...mmm,” comes Komaeda’s response, and it’s hardly a questioning hum. It’s the noise of someone barely clinging onto consciousness. Someone who’s in no place to make demands, or put up a fight, or anything. It’s perfect. Suddenly, Hinata feels like he has to put a hand on his stomach and press down. Whether he wants to throw up from excitement or shame is anyone’s guess. Still, he’s come too far, and it’s not like he’s going to back down now. Komaeda said he was fine with this, after all. So, it’s fine, right? It’s not like anyone else is watching, anyway. He can do...whatever he wants.
A mantra of similar sentiments repeats in his head as he puts his hand back on Komaeda. First, it’s on his shoulder, but then, between moments of hesitation, it trails downward to his elbow, then his hand, then his hip, before finally settling on his thigh. A soft, high noise teeters in Komaeda’s throat, and it makes Hinata shudder.
“Fuck,” Hinata breathes as he squeezes Komaeda’s thigh. He always marvels at how he’s able to feel meat and muscle instead of just bone now. It’s a beautiful sign of progress, and it’s also painfully arousing—especially when Komaeda keeps making soft, unconscious noises.
Hand still on Komaeda’s thigh, Hinata leans over his body to kiss at his neck, his one arm easily holding himself up. He feels Komaeda’s breath against his skin growing uneven. Hinata strains to hear every little sound—every puff of air as he kisses his neck, and every little whimper when he nips at skin. Truly, he has Komaeda right where he wants him: exposed, defenseless, and all his. With no one around to tell him otherwise, the power rushes to his head (and his cock), and he squeezes Komaeda’s thigh harder, teeth sinking deeper in. He feels Komaeda squirm beneath him and whine a bit louder; belatedly, he remembers his promise to Komaeda: “I’ll be gentle.”
Right. Gentle. He…can’t get too ahead of himself. Even if a part of him wants to dig in and bite and grab with reckless abandon, he has to be careful. Komaeda had been grateful enough to give him this chance—he can’t waste it this quickly.
So, with lingering reluctance and face burning with humiliation, he pulls away, sitting back on his knees and staring down at Komaeda’s now still body. He recalls, years ago, when seeing Komaeda so still would have been cause for concern. Every time he woke up next to him, he’d feel an urge to put his fingers to Komaeda’s neck; to listen for a heartbeat; to watch for the rise and fall of his chest. Anything to push away the thoughts of fire and crimson; of sterile, blue light and endless nights looking at a screen. Anything but that.
Now, Komaeda’s chest easily rises and falls with deep breaths. There’s still the occasional wheeze, and sometimes his body fails him, but he’s not a walking red flag anymore. The fact that they can do anything like this is…well, it almost feels like a miracle. But, it’s not a miracle—it’s a product of all of their combined hard work. Every decision they have made, good and bad, has led them to the future they have now. And, as he runs his hand down Komaeda’s thigh, he finds himself unable to think of a better future.
…great. Now he’s getting wrapped up in sentimentality. He really needs to get a hold of himself.
Hinata shakes his head to clear his thoughts. Gotta focus on the task at hand.
Since he’s not yet fully hard, he decides to experiment. He nudges Komaeda’s leg up, scooting closer. Remaining on his knees, he holds one of Komaeda’s legs up, and he straddles the other one. All the while, he watches Komaeda’s face, noticing the cute ways in which it twitches and wrinkles up.
He rolls his hips forward, the front of his boxers grinding against Komaeda’s ass. Immediately, bolts of electricity shoots up his spine, and the arm holding himself up trembles. “Fuck,” he breathes again, unable to keep himself from moving forward once more. The way Komaeda’s body jerks underneath him—like he’s little more than a doll—makes Hinata’s heart start to pound. What he’s doing…it’s so…unthinkable. To say it’s perverted would be the biggest understatement one could make. It’s horrible to take advantage of someone like this while they’re asleep. If it weren’t for Komaeda giving his consent prior…
It doesn’t take long for him to feel restrained by his boxers. Through the darkness, he also notices Komaeda’s a bit hard, too. The observation makes the corner of his lip twitch up into a smirk, and he can’t help but wonder if Komaeda’s having any weird dreams because of this. He wonders if they involve him.
Well, no time to think on that, he supposes. After the brief preview of how this works, all Hinata wants to do is get right back to it. He pulls away from Komaeda, trying to ignore how the other shudders as he goes to grab their lube.
Before tending to himself, he first pulls down Komaeda’s boxers. Embarrassment nearly burns him alive as the pair slowly slides down Komaeda’s legs, revealing more and more until he’s fully exposed. Hinata can’t help himself from running a finger along one of Komaeda’s tan lines on his thigh from an old sunburn that’s long since healed. After all, who’s around to stop him? To tease him for not being able to keep his hands off of that pretty, pale skin? It’s just him here. Him and Komaeda, and it’s not like Komaeda’s in any place to judge him.
To prove his point, the lube is set aside, and he puts both hands on Komaeda. He grabs at his chest, at his shoulders, at his stomach, at his hips, at his thighs—anywhere he can easily reach. He grabs, and he squeezes, and he admires every little mark. Excitement and shame flicker in him together, erupting into a wildfire that threatens to consume everything it touches. Every tan line, every scar, every wrinkle, every imperfect patch of skin…it’s all for Hinata. All for him to touch, and kiss, and ogle, and—
Hinata blinks. His vision refocuses out of its haze. His hands, which have somehow wound up cupping Komaeda’s face, slide back toward himself. Komaeda’s expression is unchanged, with the exclusion of a small contortion every now and again. Despite Hinata’s incessant, nearly desperate groping, he remains unfazed.
God, this is too much power for Hinata. Even now, even when Komaeda isn’t saying a word, isn’t even conscious, he still has this effect over Hinata. It makes Hinata’s teeth grit. He really needs to get a fucking grip. He earned this power—if he wastes it, he’ll never forgive himself.
With a harsh sigh, he tugs his own boxers off unceremoniously and tosses them aside. After coating his cock in lube, he takes the same position as before, holding one of Komaeda’s legs up and straddling the other. He presses his tip to his entrance, biting the inside of his cheek. Though Komaeda is by no means new to being penetrated, there’s still a bit of tightness that Hinata has to push through. He hears Komaeda’s breath hitch, and when he finally pushes in, Komaeda gasps. It shoots a tingle up Hinata’s spine. The tightness, the warmth of Komaeda’s insides, the way his face scrunches up and he shakily moans in his sleep—it’s like heaven. It’s better than heaven, probably. Hinata’s definitely feeling like he’s having some kind of religious experience. When he finally bottoms out, it’s like reaching nirvana.
Hinata brushes Komaeda’s hair out of the way to better see him. His face is relaxed now, eyes shut and mouth slightly open. A bit of drool collects on the corner of his mouth. If they ever do this again, Hinata will have to remember to take advantage of that. Well…at least no one’s around to judge him for having thoughts like those.
For now, after a moment of stillness, Hinata’s hips move. Small puffs of air leave him from the effort, and the fan still drones on in the background, but the only noise he can focus on is the obscene, wet slapping of skin against skin. The angle of his thrusts allow him to go deep into Komaeda, every jerk of his hips driving him higher and higher.
That aside, though, what becomes much more appealing, Hinata realizes, is the way Komaeda’s moving. Underneath him, every time Hinata’s hips snap forward, Komaeda jolts back, body limp as it follows whatever Hinata does. It urges Hinata to move his hips faster, to try and thrust deeper and harder, desperate to watch how Komaeda’s body responds to it. It’s like Komaeda’s just a toy—something for Hinata to use at his leisure. His brain can’t get enough of that thought, and before he even realizes he’s completely abandoned hesitation and caution, the bed’s also rocking with his efforts.
He hears Komaeda, too. Over the creaking of their bed frame, over his heavy breathing, he hears Komaeda’s quiet, whiney, “Uh, uh, uh”s. Like it’s the only noise he can make in that state. Like Hinata can still make him feel good, even when he’s asleep.
“Fuck, fuck, fuck,” Hinata drones on quietly. “Nagito.” The name’s growled out, possessiveness creeping in his veins. He couldn’t imagine anyone else doing this to Komaeda—getting to see him this vulnerable, getting to fuck him as hard as he does, getting to use his given name like he gets to—the passing thought of Komaeda having this kind of bond with anyone but Hinata makes him want to scream. He wants to sink his teeth into Komaeda and cover that pretty skin in splotches of red and purple, so everyone can know who he belongs to. However, this will have to do. For now, this is enough. After all, no one else could get Komaeda like this—they wouldn’t dare.
Hinata’s pace becomes breakneck. Komaeda’s body practically thrashes back and forth around under him, various parts of his body unconsciously tensing. All the while, Hinata tries to keep himself quiet, eyes squeezing shut as he drinks in every noise Komaeda makes like it’s the sweetest, richest nectar he could ever find.
Then, something snaps. Komaeda’s voice pitches up to a shaky squeak as he cums on himself and the bed, proceeding to twitch a bit afterward. It almost makes Hinata giddy to know that he did that. Without Komaeda even truly knowing, he got him to cum. All the more proof that Komaeda is his—his to kiss, his to touch, his to fuck.
Hips continuing to move, Hinata grows desperate for his own high. Without thought, he tugs Komaeda closer, making their hips nearly flush together as he helplessly ruts into Komaeda. And, to his delight, Komaeda doesn’t stir awake. He simply moves with Hinata’s movements, completely at his mercy. It also seems like, despite not being awake for it, Komaeda’s orgasm left him worn out and drooling, as he barely reacts much to Hinata aside from the occasional gasp and murmur.
“Oh, fuck, Nagito,” Hinata groans, fingers digging into the leg he’s holding up, “Nagito, Nagito—” Komaeda’s name spills out of his mouth like a prayer, and if anyone were around or awake, the amount of judgement he’d get for that would have probably made him crumble.
Thankfully, there’s no final judgement, and his prayer gets answered. He spills into Komaeda, hips pressed as close as he can get. He grits his teeth, swallows the saliva that had gathered in his mouth, and tries to quiet the growls rumbling in his throat as he holds himself there. Stars form, twinkle, and explode behind his closed eyes, and his head feels like it’s been filled with cotton. It takes him several moments to ride out his orgasm, hips unconsciously moving up and down and grinding until he's content. After all, it's all on his terms now.
With an eventual sigh, he finally manages to pull away, eyes slowly opening. Komaeda’s body is still now, and Hinata swears his face is flushed, along with his jaw and a bit of his neck being covered in drool. Affection swells and replaces the arousal in Hinata.
However, now that he’s out of…whatever haze that all put him in, he remembers the second promise he made to Komaeda:
“I won’t make a big mess.”
Hinata smacks himself in the forehead. “Oh, damn it.”
“Look, I said I’m sorry.”
Hinata can barely look at Komaeda as he apologizes, sitting on their stripped bed with his head hung low like a puppy ready to accept punishment. While getting to see Komaeda’s face throughout last night was an absolute pleasure, having to see his face after he woke up just made him feel humiliated. Komaeda had woken up to a sore body, and a stripped bed, and…of course, Hinata had to explain to him what happened, even if he really, really didn’t want to.
“I’m, uh, I’m just,” Komaeda cuts himself off with a laugh. Hinata puts his face in his hands. “I’m just kind of surprised, honestly! Not only did you break one of the only promises you made to me, you only barely kept the other one! I, um, thought you were a bit more reliable, Hajime.”
“Hey! I am, I—”
“If you were,” Komaeda speaks over him, making Hinata grumble, “we wouldn’t be having this conversation, would we?”
“I didn’t mean to! I just got a bit too into it! You can’t hold that against me!”
Hinata’s head snaps up to look at Komaeda’s face, which all but verbally says, “I absolutely can hold it against you.” His brow furrows. “...okay, w-well, I’m gonna make it up to you, okay?”
“Oh? Hajime-kun is gonna make it up to me?” Komaeda says in that high, playful voice that makes it really hard to be serious. “And how is he gonna do that?”
“I…I’ll do whatever you want today,” Hinata quickly replies. “Besides washing the bed—which I’m already doing, by the way—I’ll do whatever else you want. It’s the least I can do after, you know…”
“After using me for your own pleasure?” Komaeda supplies, giggling at the way Hinata’s face lights up redder than a tomato.
“Don’t say it like that!” He snaps, voice nearly cracking. His hand shoots up to point at Komaeda. “You- You let me do that! It’s not like I just took advantage of you! I’m not like that!”
“Ahhh…I guess I did,” Komaeda concedes with a shrug, still smirking. “I’d ask if you enjoyed it, but I think we both know the answer to that, huh?”
Hinata, instead of dignifying those words with a reply, puts his head in his hands. “...do you want to spend the day together, or not?” He eventually grumbles.
“Aw, are you embarrassed, now?” Komaeda teases, making Hinata bury his face into his palms. Despite himself, he relaxes when Komaeda adds on, “I would love nothing more than to spend the day with you, Hajime.”
“C-Cool. Good.” Finally, he brings his head up and moves to Komaeda’s side, pausing before pressing a kiss to the other’s cheek. “And…I’m sorry, again. For…you know. Getting a bit too into things.”
Komaeda hums, his smirk turning into a smile. He leans closer, head pressing against Hinata’s shoulder. “It’s okay. I came out of it mostly unscathed. I’m just glad the sight of me unconscious wasn’t utterly repulsive!”
“It could never be,” Hinata quickly assures, only realizing how that sounds after. He adds in a quick grumble, “I-I mean…you look fine no matter what.”
“...mmhm,” Komaeda responds, though he ends up laughing quietly. Hinata’s never been so desperate to change a topic in his life.
“A-Anyway, I know this might be…kind of pointless to ask,” Hinata rubs the back of his neck, “but…did you…get anything out of that?”
At the question, Komaeda pauses and stares off in thought. “...well…it’s hard to remember much after a point,” he admits. “But…I remember as I was drifting off…I felt safe. Like, no matter what, I knew you would take care of me.” He chuckles. “Even if you did make a bit of a mess…whenever I’m with you, even when I’m not conscious, I, uh, feel like it’ll all be okay. I guess I always feel that way, though, honestly.”
“...oh,” is all Hinata feels like he can say. His heart begins to thump faster when he realizes how much it means for Komaeda to say that. Komaeda, however, tilts his head, smile faltering.
“Ah, sorry…that’s probably not what you want to hear, is it?” He asks.
“N-No! No! It’s…to be honest, I didn’t know what I wanted to hear,” Hinata reassures. “But…it’s good to know you got something out of it. It’d kind of suck if you didn’t.”
“Well, um…I think I did. I…don’t think I’d mind doing it again,” Komaeda decides, and Hinata’s heart skips a bit in excitement.
“Y-Yeah?”
“Yeah.” Komaeda nods. “But, uh, try not to make a mess next time, okay?”
Hinata crosses his arms, scowling down at their bed. “...I’ll…try,” he mutters. Then, he looks up, properly sitting up as Komaeda lifts his head. “Anyway, we can talk more about it later. What do you wanna do first?”
“Hmm…a bath together, maybe?” Komaeda suggests. “It’ll be nice for my legs.”
“Sure,” Hinata easily accepts, and then scoffs as he watches Komaeda stretch his arms out toward him and make repeated grabbing motions with his hands.
“And, uh…you’ll carry me there?”
Well, how can Hinata say no to those eyes? With another “sure,” he gets off the bed, then scoops Komaeda up into his arms. Then, he carries him off, affection bubbling up in his chest once more. After all, he gets to enjoy Komaeda’s vulnerable moments, both conscious and unconscious. What person wouldn’t feel lucky?