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It's a strange little habit they've developed. Him and San. They'd finish a show, leave the stage, pile into a car to stumble into their hotel rooms for the night. But naturally, that electricity wouldn't leave right away. It wasn't always immediate. Sometimes it'd be after they'd both showered, or after they'd turned on the cable tv. But sometimes it was the second the door shut. San would capture Wooyoung's lips in his with a ferocious bite, tongue immediately dancing with his own, curious hands begging to peal off the warm-ups to reach skin. Sometimes they'd fall on the bed together and go further. Sometimes Wooyoung would give himself over to that electricity buzzing in his veins and just feel. Sometimes it was what one needed after a high like that—to ride it out to completion. That's all they were doing. And that's all they did tonight.
They never quite laid together afterwards, and tonight was no different. The show had gone well. That high they'd felt afterwards was pleasant this time. So pleasant Wooyoung hadn't even been sure they'd go there that night. But alas, neither of them could come down. Not with a shower, not with a movie, so naturally, they'd fallen into one another again. And now they were here.
Wooyoung felt sticky he realized. His thighs were coated over and his stomach too. He should really clean up. Sometimes San would help with that. One look up at his dopey smile and Wooyoung knew tonight would be one of those nights. Wordlessly he watched as the man left the bed for the bathroom. Returning a moment later with a warm towel.
Wooyoung was handled softly and gently. It was kind of artful to see such large hands move so delicately. "You okay?" That was always what San asked after. Each time the question more cautious than ever—like if Wooyoung were to ever say no some delicate fabric of reality would rip.
"Yep."
He watched as San left for the bathroom again. This time he took longer as he peed or composed himself or cried (Wooyoung had only heard him do so once afterwards) whatever it was. Wooyoung was content to just sit in the bed and wait.
This wasn't as hard for him as it was San. He'd long accepted himself as being different from those around him. It wasn't that hard for him to admit (if asked off camera of course). But with San... it was just different. Wooyoung knew it. San was practically raised in the church, and while maybe that isn't always indicative of certain beliefs, in San's case it most certainly was. Only recently had he even decided he was an atheist. And while Wooyoung was proud of him for figuring something like that out about himself, it doesn't erase years of conditioning. Not that fast. But Wooyoung understood that and was willing to be patient. Besides, even if San had no problem with the things they did the rest of the world would. So somewhere along the line Wooyoung had decided to come to terms with the fact that their passion would long be confined to the impersonal walls of various anonymous hotel rooms.
"You okay?" It was Wooyoung's turn to ask when San finally returned.
"Yeah." Came the positive acknowledgment before he properly plopped back down on the bed. Wooyoung couldn't help but notice San had changed, and suddenly his own are skin felt prickly and cold. He stole a glance at his suitcase on the other side of the room. He imagined how exposed he'd have to look to walk over to it and dig through for pajamas, so he decided he'd rather just pass out like this.
Eventually San turned the light out and the hotel room was then masked by darkness. San's hands found Wooyoung's hips and pulled him close after they'd both lied down for the night. This too wasn't unusual so Wooyoung let it happen. Honestly, in the dark like this, Wooyoung often welcomed it. For some, it's easier to be yourself in the shadows. For Wooyoung, he'd always found it easier to pretend.
"You're perfect," San whispered in his ear that night. It was what Wooyoung assumed was supposed to be a compliment. Even if didn't feel specific nor true. He supposed it's the kind of thing people say when they crash down form the high too delirious with exhaustion to be much more thoughtful. Honestly, Wooyoung was reaching that place of tiredness himself. So he closed his eyes and hummed what he hoped translated as a 'thank you'.
Then he added," you are too. Perfect."
He felt as San's body stiffened in the slightest. Wooyoung hadn't meant for it to be so revolutionary of a statement. But luckily in a few moments that tenseness was gone and eventually all reserve had given way to sleep. With Wooyoung not too far behind.