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Steve was celebrating the merriest Christmas he’d had in five years. During the Blip, nobody ever felt like celebrating anything. Seasons, holidays, and special occasions all passed without fanfare. Had another few years gone by, there could’ve been those who managed to move on, but there would still always be those who couldn’t. There was no use dwelling on such melancholic thoughts now though, because everyone had been brought back!
So far this year, the Avengers had all been busy helping the world rebuild after reintroducing half its population. After all, as rewarding as Bruce’s snap had been, it had left billions of people in a tight spot. Healthcare, the job market, housing, the economy, and agriculture were just some of the many systems that needed a boost in order to get everything back on track. The Avengers all helped in whatever ways they could, leaning into their own personal strengths to provide the best help.
In truly heroic fashion, along with all of his other responsibilities, Tony had managed to have the Compound reconstructed in time for the holidays. Everyone had been working so hard that it was wonderful to have a reason to finally all get together, relax, and celebrate.
It was nearing mid afternoon, and there were still plenty of festivities in full swing. The morning had primarily been composed of gift giving and receiving. Most of the gifts had consisted of white elephants or objects related to inside jokes, but everyone had come together to load Morgan and Peter up with more presents than they’d ever need.
There was holiday music quietly playing through the speaker system, decorations on both the inside and outside of the Compound, and a different Christmas movie playing on every screen.
At the moment, everyone was outside taking advantage of the fact that it had been a white Christmas this year. They occurred more often than not in the northeast, but as fate would have it, it was the first one since the Blip.
There was snowball fighting, snowman building, sledding, and even ice skating out on the newly refilled lake next to the Compound. After a lot of begging from the Guardians, Wanda was using her telekinetic abilities to help them build a snowman. So far, it was over twenty feet tall, and they still weren’t ready to add any finishing touches. Scott and Sam were busy taking turns using Steve’s shield to sled down a steep hill. Tony, Pepper, and Rhodey were watching Morgan and Peter skate out on the ice. Morgan still wasn’t the most coordinated, but Peter never let her fall.
Steve was enjoying himself in a snowball fight. He’d had to pull back on his strength a bit when it had been him and Bucky versus Clint and Natasha, but now that they were up against Thor and Vision, there were no holds barred. T’Challa and Okoye would be facing the winner of this match, but they’d all decided that that epic battle would take place after dinner.
They fought long and hard, hitting each other with snowballs and working to knock down one another’s forts. Eventually, Bruce, who was acting as their official, declared Thor and Vision as the winners. Thor did enough celebrating for the both of them, as Vision was still a bit awkward with his reactions and responses in certain social events. Steve was a good sport about it, not really caring either way, but Bucky’s overly competitive nature had him protesting Bruce’s decision.
“What the hell are you talking about? I hit Thor twice as many times as he hit me, and our fort’s still in way better shape.” It was all in good fun though. Nobody could really be mad on a day like today.
Tony clapped his hands to get everyone’s attention. “Alright everybody, if we want to eat dinner before New Year’s, we’re gonna have to get started on it. Everybody’s contributing too. No freeloading allowed. If you don’t know how to cook, you’re gonna learn today. You don’t cook, you don't eat.”
“What about me?!” Morgan yelled from where she was out on the ice.
Tony pointed out to her. “Except for you, Maguna! You get a pass!”
Morgan pumped her arms in the air, causing her to lose her balance and fall back into a laughing Peter’s arms.
“I do want you inside though!”
Morgan whined and pouted.
Peter never liked to see Morgan, who was essentially his little sister, upset. “Aw, just a little longer, Mr. Stark! I can keep an eye on her! We’ll be done in the next half hour, promise!”
Tony grumbled something about ‘kids these days.’ Pepper laughed, but then gave Tony a look that said she was okay with leaving Morgan and Peter outside a little longer. If Pepper was okay with something, then so was Tony.
Tony raised his voice so Peter could hear him. “Alright, fine! I guess both the kids get a pass!” Tony turned to address the few remaining Avengers who were still outside. Most had already filed inside, having had their fill of the brisk, winter air. “But there does need to be an adult out here keeping an eye on everything, so who’s up for some babysitting?”
With his enhanced hearing, Peter could pick up on the direction of the conversation. “I can watch her, Mr. Stark! Really, it’s fine! I got this!” Peter called from where he and Morgan were out on the ice. They were slowly but surely inching away from the edge of the lake, but they were still far from the center.
Tony would never admit it out loud, but he wanted to make sure Peter was safe too; it wasn’t just about Morgan. Steve had heard how Tony talked about the kid all through those five miserable years. He wasn’t leaving the pair unsupervised.
“I’ll do it.” Bucky raised his metal arm as he said it.
Tony hid his grimace well, Steve almost didn’t catch it. Almost. There’s no way it got past Bucky either, but he didn’t react. Tony had really been… trying with Bucky. Five years of reflection on both Steve and Tony’s part had helped them see where the other was coming from in their dispute. Everybody was doing their best to get along.
“I can watch them. The cold doesn't really bother me anyway.” Bucky felt the need to explain himself. It wasn’t that he wanted to babysit, he just wanted some quiet time away from everybody. Spending so much time with so many different people with varying personalities was really taking a toll on him. He also wasn’t the greatest cook. Sure, he was good with knives… but not for cooking.
“Okay, Elsa,” Tony cracked. He was trying to act flippant. Like leaving Bucky to keep watch over his children, biological and otherwise, wasn’t a big deal for him. “Just make sure Thing One and Thing Two are inside in the next thirty minutes or so.
The look on Bucky’s face made it clear he hadn’t understood Tony’s reference, but he nodded his acknowledgement of Tony’s rule. With that, Tony, Pepper, Rhodey, and Steve all started making their way to the Compound, leaving Bucky to watch Peter and Morgan play. On his way back, Tony had to force himself not to keep turning around every few seconds to make sure nothing had already gone awry.
Steve chuckled, trying to ease some of Tony’s worry. “Tony, they’ll be fine.”
Tony wished he could believe him.
…
The Compound kitchen didn’t supply any views of the lake. Steve didn’t know if that was a good or bad thing for Tony. It was bad in the sense that Tony not being able to see only allowed his mind to wander and come to the worst conclusion. It was good in the sense that eventually, Tony started to loosen up a bit.
Everyone was taking on some role in the kitchen. There were baking sheets, pans, and trays that needed grease or parchment paper. There was a massive table that needed to be set. There were various fruits and vegetables for various recipes that needed to be washed and prepped. There was a turkey that needed to be stuffed. There was stuffing that first needed to be made. There were recipe cards that needed to be pulled out and dusted off. The list went on and on.
Tony and Steve had teamed up and sequestered themselves away into a private corner of the kitchen to roll up about a hundred canned crescent rolls. They’d each roll one up and plop it on a greased baking sheet. It was silent for the first several minutes, but by about the fortieth roll, Steve felt the need to address the situation.
“Thank you… for giving Bucky a chance.” Steve wasn’t just talking about with Morgan.
Tony shrugged. “It’s nothing.”
“It’s not nothing. It means a lot to him, even if he doesn’t really show it, and it means a lot to me too.”
“Yeah, well. They’ll all be fine out there. I can be a bit much when it comes to Peter and Morgan. Pepper calls me a helicopter parent.”
Steve laughed. “Well, if you’re a helicopter parent, I guess that makes me a helicopter friend.”
Tony stopped rolling his crescent midway through, looking up at Steve. “What do you mean by that?”
Steve had stopped rolling too. “I guess… I get nervous about leaving Bucky alone.”
Tony looked alarmed now. “Why? You don’t think he can be trusted alone?”
“No, Tony. It’s not like that. It’s just… even though I know it’s impossible, I can’t help but worry that one day he might… disappear again.”
They both got back to their task at hand. It was quiet again until Tony broke the silence. “I know what you mean by that. We know it’s possible, ‘cause we’ve seen it with our own eyes. And this universe is so big, so full of life, good and bad. Who knows when the next baddie’s gonna pull a stunt like Thanos? It might not even be on our planet, or in our galaxy for that matter. There might not be anything any of us can do about it. And all you want to do is protect them, right? It’s like…”
“It’s like you never want to let them out of your sight?” Steve finished.
“Yeah, my therapist actually says there’s a name for it: Post-Blip Separation Anxiety.”
“You have a therapist?” Steve asked in disbelief.
“You don’t?” Tony was quick to counter. “Weren’t you literally leading a support group there for a while?”
Steve ignored that last part. “I don’t know. Bucky’s got one. It wasn’t really his choice though, you know? It’s one of the conditions of his pardon or something.”
“I didn’t know that,” Tony mumbled. A few more rolls were completed. “Do you think it’s helping him?”
“Honestly?” Steve opened one of the last cans with a loud, satisfying pop. They were almost done. “I think it is. He never tells me about his sessions, and I don’t push, but I can tell he’s better.”
“That’s good. I know it helps me be better.” Tony started filling the last tray. “Better for Pepper, and Morgan, and the other people I care about.”
“That’s good.” Steve echoed. Maybe he’d give therapy a try. He could call Bucky’s therapist about it or talk to her after one of Bucky’s sessions. Hell, a joint session here or there would probably do them both some good.
“Alright, the rolls are taken care of. Should we move on to the-”
Peter suddenly came bursting into the kitchen with Morgan in his arms. His face was red and windburnt from the speed he’d used to get to the Compound, and he was still in his ice skates that were slicing up the floor. His sudden entrance had captured everyone’s attention as the kitchen came to a silent standstill. “Tony, it’s Bucky!” Peter panted out.
Tony was rushing forward, ready to check Morgan over for any injuries. “What?! What’d he do?!”
Steve’s own heart was in his throat. Bucky would never hurt anyone! Shuri had taken care of all his Winter Soldier programming back during his time in Wakanda. Bucky would never turn into that person again, would he?
Peter sat a crying Morgan down beside him, completely oblivious to what Tony was afraid of. “Bucky fell through the ice!”
“What?!” Now Steve was rushing forward. “Tony, call a suit!” Steve called behind him as he tore through the kitchen. Steve heard Cho telling Tony to bring Bucky to the Medbay as soon as they got him.
“Understood, Cho. Pepper, help Peter and Morgan warm up. The rest of you, stay here. We don’t need a crowd.”
When Steve finally ran outside, he instantly caught sight of where Bucky’d fallen through the ice. It was way too close to the middle of the lake. There were no signs of Bucky anywhere. He wasn’t flailing in the water or grabbing at the edges of the ice, trying to pull himself out. He must have gone under. Steve cursed.
Fast as Steve was, Tony was faster flying overhead in his Iron Man suit. The suit went crashing through the ice. Steve had made it to the shore and was looking out to see where Tony would emerge, hopefully with Bucky. He was almost tempted to go running out on the ice, but he knew things would only be worse if he managed to fall in too.
“C’mon, Stark. C’mon, Bucky.” Steve prayed, completely helpless.
After a few more agonizing seconds, the suit came crashing out of the water, carrying Bucky. Tony landed the suit and laid Bucky down on the banks of the lake. His eyes were closed. He wasn’t moving. He wasn’t breathing!
Steve dropped to his knees beside Bucky and immediately started performing CPR. He could hear Bucky’s ribcage creaking under the pressure he was having to use. With each compression, water spurted and trickled out Bucky’s mouth. After delivering two rescue breaths, Steve restarted compressions, his rhythm never faltering. “C’mon, Bucky! Not here! Not like this! Not today!”
Distantly, Steve could hear Peter yelling. He had changed into boots, and was now running down to the lake. “Mr. Stark, I’m so sorry!”
“Peter! I told you to stay inside and warm up!”
Peter ignored him. “I got distracted! I was trying to show Morgan some stupid trick. I thought she was watching me. I thought she was right behind me, but I guess she’d gotten too close to the middle. I heard the ice cracking, but Bucky ran out and grabbed her and slid her to safety before I could. This was all my fault!”
“Peter, it’s not your fault, and Morgan’s okay. I’m not mad at-”
Steve tuned them out. He was gonna leave whatever mess that was between Tony and Peter to them. Right now, he had much bigger fish to fry. Steve was about ready to abandon the CPR altogether and just focus on getting Bucky to the Medbay as fast as possible, but then, Bucky came to, spluttering and gasping. He started shivering immediately.
“Bucky! Bucky, hey?! Can you hear me?!” Bucky’s wide, wild eyes weren’t tracking Steve at all.
Steve’s yelling had caught both Tony and Peter’s attention, pulling them out of their exchange.
“I need to get him to the Medbay.” Steve was already pulling Bucky into his arms. All of Bucky’s muscles were locked up tight from the cold.
“Do you want me to fly him?” Tony was quick to suggest. Bucky had just saved his daughter’s life. Despite all past opinions of him, the least Tony could do was help get him to medical treatment faster. “It might be quicker.”
“No, no. That much wind would only make it worse. I’ve got him.” Steve was already trudging through the snow, trying to shield Bucky as much as possible.
At Steve’s side, Tony was able to really get a close look at Bucky. He did not look good. “Christ, wasn’t he just saying how the cold doesn’t bother him?”
“Tony, shut up.”
Peter had pulled ahead and was holding the door to the Compound open for them. Never mind the fact that Tony easily could’ve ordered FRIDAY to open the door for them automatically. In a crisis like this, Peter had to at least try and be useful.
Once they were out of the cold, Steve broke into a run the rest of the way to the Medbay. Cho already had a bed set up. Steve tried to lay Bucky down on it, but Bucky wouldn’t let go. He couldn’t let go. His fingers had clutched tightly onto Steve’s shirt, and now he didn’t have the coordination to unlatch them.
Steve was still hunched awkwardly over Bucky, unable to get out of his hold. “Bucky, you have to let go.”
“C-Can’t. C-C-Can’t. S-S’rry. C-Can’t.” Bucky’s fingers weren’t listening to him.
“Okay, it’s okay.” Steve was soft for Bucky, but then raised his voice. “Tony, Peter, a little help here please?”
“Right, right, sorry.” Tony sprang into action. “Kid, you get the right one. I’ve got the left.”
“I can get the left one Mr. Stark. I’ve got super strength. Even with your suit, it would be easier for me-”
“No, I don’t want you near-”
“Stark, shelve it! I don’t care who does what, but hurry it up! We don’t have time for this!” Steve was never one to lose his temper, unless it came to Bucky’s well-being. Eventually, they were able to free Steve from Bucky. Steve didn’t know who wound up working on which arm. He didn’t care.
Bucky was curled up as tightly as he could be on the bed. The power from the shivers wracking his body were causing his muscles to spasm, jerking his limbs inward. It looked like he was having a seizure.
Cho stepped forward, aiming a no-touch digital thermometer at Bucky’s head. “94.2. Alright, help me get him out of these wet clothes.” Cho passed a few sets of medical shears around.
Bucky had been wearing layers outside, so there was a lot to go through. Bucky’s constant movement wasn’t helping either. Nobody wanted to nick him by accident.
As soon as Bucky’s brain caught on to what was happening, he went into a bit of a panic. He couldn’t remember what had happened, what was going on, or who he was with. All he knew was that people were removing his clothes. In his experience, that never led to anything good.
He started trying to fight, but it was as if all his movements were happening in slow motion. He could barely curl his metal arm into a fist before throwing it at the nearest person.
Thankfully, Peter had his spider sense, and he was able to back away from the bed in time. “Whoa!”
Tony caught sight of the near miss. “Peter, I want you out now. The adults will handle it from here.”
Peter got back to cutting. “I’m good, Mr. Stark. I’m good. He just surprised me is all.”
“Peter, I’m not kidding this time. I need you to leave. Go back to Pepper and Morgan, now.”
Steve was trying to get Bucky to settle down. “Tony’s right, Peter. Things might get a little dicey in here, and if we’re worried about you, we can’t focus on him. We’ll all be fine. You’re good to go.”
“Alright, Captain.” Peter still looked hesitant, but he gave a little halfhearted salute before turning to leave.
“Why do my kids listen to every other adult but me?” Tony muttered to himself before turning back to his task.
Without having to worry about the kid, Steve could focus all his attention on Bucky. “You’re good, Bucky. You’re good. It’s just us, your friends. It’s Steve and Tony and Cho.”
Bucky stopped fighting them, but started mumbling unintelligibly. Steve leaned in closer to try and catch what he was saying, but he couldn’t pick up any coherent words, let alone sentences.
Cho brought over an armful of heated blankets. The team set about draping them in several layers over Bucky’s nearly naked body. Soft and warm as the blankets were, they might as well have covered Bucky in flaming sandpaper. The sensation was awful on his frozen skin.
Cho checked his temperature again. “90.7. It’s still dropping.” Cho looked around, trying to find out what she was missing. It hit her suddenly. “His arm.”
Steve’s brow furrowed. “What about it?”
“Just look at it. It’s definitely not helping him warm up.” Cho pointed at it. The vibranium arm looked and felt like an icicle. Lake water had literally frozen onto it with a layer of ice nearly half an inch thick. “Do you know how to remove it?”
“Uh…no.” Steve was upset, because he’d literally had this conversation with Bucky a few times before. He’d given several reasons why he should know, but Bucky had always reassured him that they’d never have to remove the arm. Well, here they were, needing to remove the arm and not knowing how. “Bucky knows, but he’s never told me.”
“Would T’Challa know?”
Steve’s face lit up. He hadn’t even thought of that. They were lucky the Compound was so full for the holidays. “He might.”
“FRIDAY?” Tony looked up at the ceiling as he asked.
“Right away, boss.” After a few moments, FRIDAY’s voice broke back in, relaying T'Challa's message. “King T’Challa has informed me that the actions required for taking the arm off are difficult to explain. The arm wasn’t designed to come off easily. He’s on his way now to remove it himself.”
Cho rolled with it. “Okay, great. Until he gets here, let's just try and keep his arm pulled as far away from his body as he’ll let us.”
Cho passed Steve another blanket. He wrapped it around the arm and tried pulling the prosthetic away from the rest of Bucky. It was difficult, given that Bucky kept trying to draw his limbs back in, closer to his center. “Bucky, hey. Let me have your arm for a minute. Trust me, you don’t want to hold this one close anyway.”
“C’n h’ve it. Y’can’t h’ve it.”
“No, Buck. I’m not taking it. I’m just holding it to the side for a minute. It’s keeping you from warming up. You wanna be warm, right?”
“Y’s, w’rm. W’rm, pl’se.”
“That’s right. You will be soon. We’re trying. Just hang in there for us.”
At that moment, T’Challa arrived. He quickly went through the process of removing Bucky’s arm. Steve tried to memorize the movements of T’Challa’s hand at first glance. He’d probably need a refresher. T’Challa placed the arm aside on a nearby table, and asked if he could be of any more assistance.
Steve looked at Cho, letting her be the one to answer. Steve felt like they had this under control, but if Cho could think of any other way T’Challa could help Bucky, Steve was on board. “No, thank you, Your Majesty.”
“Always happy to be of service when it comes to Barnes. I’ll be back to visit when he’s well again.” T’Challa gave a little bow before exiting.
It was around this time Bucky noticed his now detached prosthetic limb lying stretched out on the table. His eyes flashed to Steve’s accusingly. “H-hey! Y-you said! You s-said!”
“I know. I know what I said. We’re not taking it away. We just had to take it off until you warm up. Once you’re back to baseline, we can put it right back on, okay?”
“B-Back on?”
“Yup. We’ll put it right back on. Just not yet, okay?”
“‘Kay St’ve.” Bucky closed his eyes, appeased for now.
Steve noticed there was no longer a tremor running beneath the blankets. Steve sighed in relief. Looks like things were finally turning around. “Cho, I think he finally stopped shivering.”
Despite Steve’s optimistic declaration, Cho frowned. That wasn’t necessarily a good thing. She ran another temperature check. “Shit. 88.5.”
Steve’s good mood was immediately shattered. “What?! He’s getting colder?! I don’t get it. Why isn’t he warming up?”
Cho was performing a controlled scramble around the room as she collected more supplies. “Sometimes, it can take the body time to catch back up with itself. All it means is that we’re gonna need to step up our care a bit. Just keep him awake, Steve. Don’t let him fall asleep. Tony, you’re with me.”
“What?! But I don’t know anything about-”
“I’ll direct you. Don’t worry, you’re not gonna be doing anything crazy. I just might need an extra set of hands for some of this.”
Steve looked down at Bucky, who’s eyes were still closed. He gave him a light tap on the cheek. When he didn’t open his eyes, Steve shook his shoulders, calling his name. “Bucky! Bucky, hey! You’re not supposed to be sleeping!” When that still didn’t work, Steve pinched a thin layer of ice cold skin on Bucky’s forearm hard.
Bucky’s eyes flew open. “Hey! Qui’it!”
“Sorry, buddy. You gotta stay awake though.”
Cho came over with an oxygen mask in her hand. She gave it to Steve, knowing he’d have more luck getting it strapped to Bucky’s face than her. “Have him breathe through this. It’s humidified oxygen. It should help rewarm his airways.”
Steve settled the mask on Bucky’s face, adjusting the strap behind his ears. Bucky weakly shook his head at first, attempting to dislodge the mask. He was probably flashing back to his time at HYDRA, when they’d fit him with his bulky, constricting mask fresh out of cryo. “Just oxygen, buddy. Nothing bad. I promise.”
“Tony, if you could just hold his arm for me please.” Cho had pulled Bucky’s flesh arm out from under the blankets, and was preparing to insert a needle for an IV. Tony pressed down on Bucky’s forearm and upper arm to keep him still. Steve put a bit more pressure on Bucky’s shoulders too, knowing a needle wasn’t going to feel good piercing his hypersensitive skin.
Bucky’s muscles were already as tense as they could be, but Steve could tell right away when Cho began. Bucky hissed a big gust of the humidified oxygen in through his clenched teeth. He was shifting beneath the blankets, but unable to do much to try and escape. Cho was good at what she did though, and the painful process was over in under a minute.
“Okay, we’re good. I’m gonna start pushing some warmed saline through his system. Hopefully, that’ll be enough to beat this.” Cho opened the line as she said it, introducing the warm fluids to Bucky’s circulatory system.
They waited a few minutes to see if these new measures would take effect. Steve was still working hard at keeping Bucky awake when all he wanted to do was sleep. Cho checked his temperature again. “Phew, 89.3. It looks like everything’s finally starting to kick in. He shouldn’t require any further intervention on our part now.”
“If his temperature had kept dropping, what would we have done?” Steve asked, curious.
“If his core temperature had kept dropping, we would’ve been looking at rewarming his blood or maybe even irrigating his abdominal cavity with warm saline.”
Steve winced. “Yikes.”
“Yeah, not fun. Thankfully, he didn’t take it that far. I never like having to get much more invasive than this.”
Bucky’s eyes were closing again. Steve went to get his attention, but Cho stopped him. “He’s okay to rest now. I hate to have to say it, but honestly, Bucky’s body is probably used to this kind of event. He likely would’ve recovered even without any medical intervention on our part, but hopefully, we made things quicker and easier for him.”
Steve didn’t want to think about it, but Cho was probably right.
“I doubt there’ll be any lasting effects. I bet he’ll be right as rain by the end of the night. Maybe just a bit cold and achy for the next few days.”
“Thank you, Cho.” Steve could feel the shivers once again overtaking Bucky’s body. Bucky was breathing out little huffs and hums of pain in his sleep.
Cho did another temperature check. “91.0. We’re definitely moving in the right direction now. I can try giving him some muscle relaxants to help with the shivering and any muscle cramps, but I can’t say if they’ll provide much comfort or relief. His metabolism isn’t always the most cooperative.”
“Don’t I know it. We’d appreciate you trying either way though. Even if it only helps a little bit, that’s still something.”
Cho left to retrieve the medication. Tony was now standing in the corner of the Medbay, rubbing his hands together. “So… is there anything else I should…?”
Steve knew Tony was itching to get back and check up on his kids. “No, we should be okay now. You’re good. I’ll stay here with him.”
“Great.” Tony gave a little thumbs up before leaving.
Now that they were alone, at least until Cho came back to deliver the medicine, Steve crawled up onto the bed and under the blankets so that he could cozy up next to Bucky. He’d wanted to hold him close the moment they arrived in the Medbay. Knowing shared body heat would only help Bucky’s body warm up, Steve fulfilled his duty as a human space heater.
As soon as Steve was nestled alongside Bucky’s body, Bucky whimpered in his sleep, and immediately latched onto Steve like he’d done when they first entered the Medbay.
“Shh, it’s okay, Bucky. I’m right here. I’m not going anywhere.”
…
It was late in the evening, and Bucky was finally back to normal. They were still in a hospital room, Bucky happily accepting another bag of warmed saline. They’d turned on Frozen, and were talking through the movie while they sipped on hot chocolate.
After “Let it Go” finished, Steve teased Bucky. “Now d’you get why Tony was calling you Elsa earlier today?”
Bucky rolled his eyes. “Whatever.” He brought his mug to his lips and tipped it all the way back, finishing what was left in it. He wiped the hot chocolate milk mustache from his face. “I need a cocoa refill.”
“Really, another one? Wasn’t that like your fourth mug?”
“Hey, Cho said warm fluids were good for me. You can’t argue with the doctor.”
“Hmm. Well, I’m pretty sure Cho meant warm chicken broth, and not just a whole bunch of sugar.”
Bucky flopped back against his pillow, petulant. “C’mon, Steve! It’s Christmas!”
“Fine. Mug number five coming right up.”
“Great, and don’t try and give me any of that watered down, pre-packaged powder bullshit like you did the first time. I only want the real deal.”
“Alright, Your Highness.”
“That’s better.”
As Steve was leaving, he was struck with a thought. “Oh, hey! Did you want your arm back yet? It’s warmed up by now. You could probably put it back on.”
Bucky shrugged. “Nah, it’s cool. I’ll just put it on in the morning. I actually kinda forgot how nice it is to not be wearing it all the time. It’s definitely way better than HYDRA’s ever was, but it can still feel a little heavy sometimes, you know?”
“You’re the boss. I’ll be right back with your cocoa.”
When Steve came back armed with cocoa, he caught sight of Bucky staring off. That was never a good sign. Steve sat the two mugs down on a table and climbed up onto the bed, sitting right beside Bucky. “Hey, you good?”
“Yeah, I’m good.” Bucky still sounded detached.
“What’re you thinking about?”
“Just… that I’d forgotten how awful it was… coming out of cryo.”
Steve grabbed onto Bucky’s flesh shoulder. Steve had only had to suffer through a defrosting process once. Bucky had been forced to do it dozens of times. “I’m sorry. I know how rough today was for you.”
Bucky kept going, needing to get this out. He’d never really talked out this part of his trauma. Not with Steve or even his therapist. “I was always so confused when I woke up. I was so cold, and everything hurt, and I never knew what was going on, you know?”
No, Steve didn’t really know. Bucky was the only living person on Earth who did. Regardless, Steve nodded back. Sometimes, it wasn’t about being able to relate to someone’s pain, but just being able to understand and empathize.
“I’ve gotten so spoiled lately, I just forgot how bad it can be.”
Steve hated that Bucky thought of living without constant pain or torture as being “spoiled”, but he ignored that little comment for now. “Well, you don’t have to get used to it. You’ll never be cold again. Not if I can help it.”
“I don’t know, Steve. Even with all your heroism, that isn’t really something you can control.” At least Bucky was smiling now.
“I can at least try limiting your exposure. Starting now, no more ice skating for you.”
Bucky looked indignant. “Hey, I wasn’t even the one ice skating! I was just out there keeping an eye on Stark’s brats. Somebody had to keep them from doing something stupid.”
“Okay, well then, no more babysitting for you. How’s that?”
“Ooh, I like the sound of that.” The pair went back to sipping their hot chocolates and watching movies. Even with a few mishaps, it had still been a Merry Christmas.