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If you ask any of his colleagues, they'll tell you that Shadow the Hedgehog is mysterious and elusive. He never smiles, he speaks matter-of-factly, and he takes his research very seriously. He rarely talks to anyone if it's not about work.
Most respect him (and enjoy the funding that his connections to G.U.N. give them), but others are put off by his stoic demeanor. He can be described as rude at times, especially on a bad day.
That's why a certain group of fellow scientists thought it was a miracle when he finally accepted their invitation to dinner. They've attempted to invite him several times over the years since they work together often, studying the same disease and all. However, Shadow would bluntly decline and they wouldn't bring it up again for a while.
They weren't sure what made this time different.
“Maybe he's softening up to us?” Tangle proposes.
“He didn't look happy about accepting,” says Whisper.
Tangle whines, “Then why? We're a jolly bunch! The best people to hang out with in this depressing facility. Right?”
Lanolin crosses her arms. “It's kind of suspicious, if you ask me.”
Tangle pouts. “You think everything is suspicious.”
Jewel chimes in, “He does great work, though, and he's committed to helping people. I think we'll get along great.”
Another figure wearing a lab coat walks towards the group. “Are you guys talking about Shadow?”
Tangle nods. “You're coming too, aren't you, Barry?”
The quokka sighs dreamily. “Of course I am, I've been dreaming of this day for so long.”
The group looks at each other with varying degrees of amusement. When Shadow joined their team several years ago, Barry fell head over heels for the dark hedgehog. Unfortunately, he turns useless around him, so they try their best to separate the two.
”Chill out,” Tangle would say. ”You don't see me and Whisper getting distracted just because we're dating!”
“Okay, enough of that,” says Jewel. “We have to make a good impression, so start thinking of places to eat.”
—☆—
Shadow pulls up to the restaurant on his motorcycle that evening. He's wearing a leather jacket. Barry nearly faints, and the rest of his colleagues gawk at him.
Shadow pauses at their expressions. “What?”
“Nothing, haha!” Tangle says. “Let's go in, guys!”
Whisper takes a red-faced Barry by the arm and forces him into the restaurant.
It's a fairly normal dinner, all things considered. Shadow doesn't talk much, so that leaves the rest of them to chatter amongst themselves as they usually do. They start to wonder if they made a mistake by pushing Shadow to socialize, but Barry opens his mouth and the evening takes a different turn.
“So, are you um, are you seeing anyone?”
The table falls silent and all his friends watch him sweat in embarrassment.
“I mean, you don't have to—”
“I have a boyfriend,’ the hedgehog says.
The silence grows thicker. Barry's jaw drops. “B-boyfriend?”
“WHAT!” Tangle shrieks, making the whole restaurant turn to them. Shadow glares at her and she slaps her hands over her mouth. “Sorry.”
As Barry contemplates his existence, Lanolin asks, “Who is it?”
“Hm..his name is Sonic.”
“Sonic…wait, it isn't that Sonic, is it?” says Whisper.
Jewel chimes in, “The famous racecar driver? Who's also the lead singer of a successful rock band?”
“Yes.”
“Oh,” Tangle laughs. “I see. You didn't have to make up a relationship just to avoid the question, Shadow. Barry isn't a creep.”
Lanolin nods. “Sorry for prying.”
Shadow crosses his arms. “I'm not making it up.”
His coworkers fall speechless. Then their expressions become strained with pity. They all give each other a doubtful look.
“Ah,” Tangle says, “I see...”
Dinner turns awkward after that. Shadow stands up before everyone and says, “I'll pay for my own dinner,” and leaves.
Barry calls out after him. “Wait, we were gonna treat—”
Shadow turns the corner and disappears from sight.
“—you.” Barry sighs and holds his head in his hands.
Whisper pats his back sympathetically.
Tangle scratches her head, confused. “I didn't expect him to be delusional like that. Hey, maybe you dodged a bullet, Barry.”
“Shut up, I'm still grieving,” says Barry.
“Oops.”
—☆—
It's awkward to work with Shadow after that, but they get their work done nonetheless. So much for a good impression.
A few days later, Shadow's best friend, a local jeweler named Rouge, visits him in the office. They've seen her around a lot, usually delivering lunch for Shadow that he supposedly forgot at home. Sometimes he can be heard telling her, “I don't need to eat,” which is certainly an odd statement. Still, she tends to bring his lunch when he walks into the facility without it.
His team takes this opportunity to corner her. Specifically, Tangle and Barry, along with Whisper as their chaperone.
“Well, hello, what can I do for you all?” Rouge says smoothly.
“You're Shadow's roommate, right? Do you know of any…weird fantasies he may have?” Tangle asks.
Rouge's eyes widen. “What?”
“Like, of dating celebrities? Famous blue hedgehogs?” says Barry.
Rouge looks impressed for some reason. “He told you about Sonic?”
Tangle sighs forlornly. “So he says it outside of work too…I feel kind of bad for the guy. Being so lonely that you form such a deep parasocial relationship…I want to help him, but I don't know how!”
Rouge's carefully crafted expression betrays complete bewilderment. Then, she bursts into laughter, and the trio glances at each other with confusion.
Rouge wipes a tear from her eye as she tries to calm down. “I'm sorry, that was the best thing I've heard in weeks. Oh, what to do?”
She taps her chin for a moment and smirks. “Yes, I fear even I can't get him to snap out of it. Be a dear for me and support him, would you? He'll need it when he realizes the truth.”
“Of course!”
Tangle and Barry form a newfound respect for Rouge as Shadow's friend. Whisper, however, feels something is wrong, but keeps it to herself for the time being.
“As fun as it is to chat with you all, I’ve got to give this to Shadow before his break ends.” Rouge lifts up the familiar lunchbox. “Buh-bye now.”
As she flies off, Barry and Tangle resolve to be better coworkers.
—☆—
Shadow has no idea what's going on. For once in his life he finds himself honestly befuddled. Ever since he joined his colleagues for dinner, they've been acting strange: avoiding him one second, then earnestly encouraging him the next.
He knows Rouge knows something because she won't stop snickering when she visits him at work.
No matter. As long as it doesn't interfere with his job, he won't care.
“So…Shadow,” Tangle says casually while they're quietly sorting papers. “How's your—um, your…boyfriend?”
“Why do you sound like you're in pain?” He asks flatly.
“What do you mean? I'm just being friendly, that's all. Can't chat with my work buddy?”
“I'd prefer if you did your work. At work.”
Tangle laughs. “Was that a joke? I didn't know you could do that!” She laughs louder, causing the rest of the team to glare at her. When she realizes Shadow isn't laughing along, she clears her throat awkwardly. “Sorry. I do want to know about your boyfriend though.”
Shadow sighs and turns to her. “Why are you all concerned with my love life? I can assure you, it's nothing that exciting.”
“You mean dating one of the most famous people on the planet isn't exciting?”
“It's annoying, that's what. Now leave me alone and do your job.” Shadow turns back to his papers. Tangle gives up.
At least, she would have, if not for the idea that pops into her head. Later, at lunch, she sits with her friends and tells them at once.
“You're insane,” Lanolin says bluntly.
“It's not a good idea,” says Whisper.
Jewel sighs. “Tangle, you have to realize how embarrassing it's going to be for Shadow, and how potentially destructive this will be. He's not exactly…a pacifist. Didn't you see him punch that one person?”
Tangle shrugs. “Yeah, but he totally deserved it. Plus, that guy ended up getting arrested and taken to prison for being a creep anyway.”
“Sure, but you know what I mean. And we don't know how bad Shadow's mental illness is! If we shatter the illusion like this, he might be truly devastated!”
Barry scratches his head. “Um, as much as I would like to help, I kind of have to agree.”
Tangle pouts. “Guys! You don't understand my genius. Shadow doesn't need kiddie gloves; he's grown and can take life-changing realizations like a real warrior!”
“I don't know…”
“You guys don't even have to do anything. I'm going to send that email to Sonic myself. Then you'll all praise me when Shadow gets the reply and changes his life around for the better.”
Lanolin rubs her temples while the others share a Look. They know they won't be able to stop her now that she's this invested, so they wipe their hands clean of it.
“Alright,” says Jewel. “Just don't come crying when karma hits you.”
Whisper nods. Barry leaves the table to grab napkins.
“Just trust me guys, you'll see.”
Tangle sneaks into Shadow's office while he's out. By some miracle, he left his laptop unlocked, and she wastes no time.
She finds the email she sent to him from her phone and copies the whole thing and deletes it. Then, she types in Sonic the Hedgehog's manager's email and presses send. Finally, she takes the extra precaution to delete the copy saved to his “sent” folder.
Giddy with adrenaline, she quickly closes it out and runs out of the room, only to ram into someone's shoulder and stumble to the floor. Tangle whips her head around, afraid that Shadow would be standing there. Instead, she is faced with an amused Rouge.
The bat leans down with a smirk and helps Tangle up off the floor. “My, what's a cutie like you doing in Shadow's office?”
Tangle wars with herself but ultimately decides to tell the truth. “I'm trying to help him move on past his fake boyfriend,” she says. “It's not healthy and we're all concerned for him. So I thought maybe Sonic himself could break him out of it, so I kind of…sent him an email. Pretending to be Shadow.”
Rouge is having a great time. This will be the funniest thing that ever happens in my life, she thinks. She tries her best not to burst out in laughter and pats Tangle on the shoulder. “You're doing a good thing, hon. It might be rough on him at first, but he's got me and all his lovely work friends to support him. Can I trust you to do that?”
Tangle nods. “Of course. We won't let him down.”
“Alright, then. I won't say a word about this to him. Go on, before he gets back.”
The young scientist waves at her as she runs off. “Thank you!”
As Rouge watches her disappear into the hall, she giggles and leans against a wall. “Did you catch all that?”
Shadow emerges from where he was hiding with an annoyed expression. “Of all the things I had to deal with today.”
“Sonic will definitely have a laugh about this.”
Shadow drags his palm down his face. “He's not going to shut up about it for weeks.”
“I guess you'll remember to start locking your computer, huh?”
“I've worked with them for years and they've never pulled something like this with me. Excuse me for finally trying to trust people.”
Rouge smiles. “Hmm, I still think you're in pretty good hands.”
Shadow scoffs, but doesn't disagree.
To: Management
From: Shadow
This letter is for Sonic the Hedgehog, and contains sensitive information that only he should see. Please send this email directly to him without prying. Thank you.
Hello, Sonic. I've had a crush on you for some time now and had to tell you how I feel. I almost feel as though I know you on a personal level. I know you've never met me, and maybe this is a long shot, but I had to try. You mean so much to me. Your smile, your beautiful green eyes.
I'll tell you a bit about myself so you can get to know me. My name is Shadow, and I am a hardworking medical scientist. It is my dream to cure diseases and bring happiness to the world, as you do for me. I might come off as rude or uncaring at first, but I actually have a soft heart. If you are willing, I have a lot of it to share with you.
Even if you don't want to be with me, I understand. You hardly know me, after all. Still, please reply with honesty. I promise I can take it.
Sincerely,
Shadow T. Hedgehog
—☆—
Shadow has the next day off, and so does Sonic. As predicted, Sonic has a blast. Not only him, but Tails and Knuckles who invited themselves over as usual. Shadow has the urge to use Chaos Control to smack all of them upside the head.
“Oh my—haha—oh, chaos!” Sonic says between his unending laughter, tears forming. “I can't believe—ahahaha!”
Tails isn't faring much better. “When she said ‘but I actually have a soft heart’, I—I almost died!” He falls into another fit of laughter, clutching his stomach.
“Do you really think my eyes are beautiful?” Sonic says as he flutters his lashes, then dissolves into giggles once more.
“Why did she word it like an application,” Knuckles manages to say. “It's almost like she wanted to try setting you up anyway.”
Sonic wheezes. “She—She didn't do a very good job, if that's the case. Did she forget stalkers exist? Oh man, this is so bad.”
Tails tries to calm himself down. “This is the most hilarious thing I've seen all week. Maybe all month.”
“At least someone is enjoying my suffering,” Shadow grumbles.
Sonic wipes tears from his eyes. “C'mon, Shads. Don't you find this even a little bit funny?”
Shadow crosses his arms. “If it wasn't sent to you, I would have reported her immediately, and she would have had to face serious legal action.”
“Don't be such a downer,” Sonic says teasingly. “All’s well that ends well. And now we have some more memories to laugh over.” He places a chaste kiss on Shadow’s cheek.
Shadow eases up and sighs. “Fine.”
Sonic grins. “Hey, you know how we can get back at them?”
Something mischievous glimmers in Shadow’s red eyes.
—☆—
The group plans another outing a couple weeks later. Despite the disastrous first dinner, they are pleased when Shadow accepts their invitation anyway. Even more surprising is the fact that he asks to bring someone along. Assuming he means Rouge, they easily agree.
“You think he got a reply yet?” Barry asks hopefully.
Jewel shrugs. “If he did, he's taking it well enough to have dinner with us.”
“Or he's taking revenge,” says Whisper.
“Psh, no way,” Tangle says. “He must want to thank us.”
Lanolin peers off into the distance. “Is that him?”
Sure enough, Shadow pulls up right on time on his motorcycle. He's alone. He pulls off his helmet and says, “My plus-one is running a little late.”
“Should we go inside, then?” Jewel asks.
Shadow nods. They walk in and choose a window table, then get themselves situated.
“Rouge still getting ready, or something?” Tangle asks.
Shadow merely shrugs.
A waiter takes their drink orders and leaves. A few minutes later, the group notices a bright red sports car pull into the parking lot.
Lanolin lets out an impressed whistle. “What a ride.”
They admire the car for a moment. Someone in a hoodie and face mask gets out and they lose interest. Shadow taps his fingers on the table impatiently. His phone rings and he picks it up at once.
An unfamiliar voice sounds through the speaker. “Sorry, Shads, got a little stuck in traffic. I would've just ran here if I knew.”
His colleagues look at each other with alarm. That is most definitely not Rouge’s voice.
Shadow shook his head. “You wanted to show off your car, didn’t you?”
“Haha, yeah, I did. Be right up!”
The call ends. His colleagues stop their muttering at once and act innocent.
“So…who was that?” Tangle asks.
“My boyfriend.”
Her jaw drops and she blurts, “That fast?” She slaps her hands over her mouth.
Shadow feigns confusion and tilts his head. “What are you talking about?”
“N—Nothing!” She laughs awkwardly.
The stranger in the hoodie walks in and they begin to connect the dots. When he removes his hood and mask, all their connections fall apart. Their jaws fall open.
“S—”
“So—”
“Soni—”
“SONIC THE HEDGEHOG?” Tangle shrieks.
The hedgehog in question grins and makes a shushing noise. “Keep it down, will ya? I came here all covered up for a reason.”
“Is—Is this some kind of crazy coincidence?” Jewel says, dizzy.
“Is this Shadow's revenge?” Lanolin mutters.
Instead of answering, Sonic smirks and kisses Shadow’s temple. “You've got some funny coworkers.”
Barry falls out of his chair. Whisper is seemingly the only one unperturbed; she had always been a sharp one.
“Hmph. If they know what's good for them, they'll stop trying to be so ‘funny’ from now on.”
Sonic chuckles. “Well, nobody got hurt, did they? Anyway, where's the waiter? I'm starving.”
The group doesn't know how they'll make it through the entire dinner. Dealing with multiple crises and the presence of a celebrity on top of an empty stomach? The average person would have faltered.
Barry's shoulders are slumped in defeat. “I can't believe you're Shadow's…boyfriend.”
“Huh? Who said I was his boyfriend?”
The whole table snaps their heads to him. Shadow rolls his eyes.
Tangle splutters. “Wha—then what is—what?”
Sonic reaches through the top of his shirt and pulls out a necklace. It's a thin but sturdy golden chain with a ring hanging off of it. He grins.
“I'm his fiancée.”
Shadow silently pulls out the same necklace from under his shirt, too. Barry falls out of his seat again but stays down this time. Lanolin shakes him and yells out his name while Tangle holds her head and screams internally. Whisper pokes at Barry with her cane while Jewel ignores them and gasps.
As the most sensible one in the group, she says, “Congratulations!”
“Thanks,” Sonic says, draping an arm over Shadow's shoulders. “We were thinking of a summer wedding. And maybe inviting you guys? It would be kinda awkward if almost all the attendees were on my side of the room…“
Shadow crosses his arms. “Sonic.”
“Oh, we would be delighted!”
Sonic looks past Jewel at the chaos happening with the rest of her friends. He snickers. “Sounds good.”
When Barry successfully awakens and things calm down after their food arrives, Tangle asks, “So, Shadow, how did you meet a celebrity like him?”
Shadow huffs and glances at Sonic.
Sonic scratches his head. “Uh, well, we kind of fought each other.”
“I—you what?”
“It was a long time ago, when I was a teenager,” he laughs. “We were dumb, but settled our differences eventually, and…now we're here.”
“That's kind of wild,” Tangle says with interest. “Who proposed? Wait, and who asked who out first?”
Whisper taps her arm. “Tangle…”
“What? I'm curious.”
Sonic waves his hand. “It's all good. I asked him out, and he proposed.”
Shadow mumbles, “More like you pestered me.”
“Aw, Shads, just admit it; you had a huge crush on me.”
“I punched you in the face.”
“And?”
Shadow can't deny it. His colleagues share a bewildered silence.
They make…quite the interesting pair, they think to themselves.
“Oh, by the way,” Sonic says to her, “I read that email you sent as Shadow. Absolute comedy gold. Thanks for the laugh, seriously.”
Tangle flushes beet red as her friends stare at her with varying expressions. “Oh, chaos,” she says.