Chapter Text
Harry has never thought of himself as anything special. He's no one spectacular: just regular old Harry Lewis from Guernsey.
In life, he's always been the odd one, his friends at any age regarding him as peculiar yet strangely loveable. He knows random facts people have never heard of before; he loves watching plane documentaries, especially ones where the plane crashes; he grew up on a farm and hopes to someday raise his own family on one too.
So when, on a random Tuesday, Harry gets an unexpected Instagram DM from a Nigerian Prince, he almost doesn’t believe it. Harry is nothing special, so why would a member of royalty from any country be interested in him?
Prince Tobit
Please help me sir.
I understand that you do not at all know me, but I am unfortunately facing severe oppression at the hands of my own advisors. My name is Prince Tobit of Nigeria, and I am in dire need of assistance from someone in the West in order to be able to gain back my own autonomy and finances. I have lived too many years under the control of my father’s council.
Sir please.
The messages come through at 6:42 p.m., the occurrence so unusual that Harry doesn’t immediately respond. He spends around fifteen minutes just scrolling through the supposed prince’s Instagram account, even checking the man’s story. There he finds a dark screen with the words ‘It really be your own people’ followed by a straight-faced emoji. Aside from the informal story, the rest of the account is evidently official, the man’s face blurred in what Harry assumes is the legal protocol for Nigerian royalty.
As a last attempt to discover fraud, and call this random guy out on his scam, Harry types ‘prince tobit of nigeria’ into his search bar. What comes up first is a Wikipedia page followed by multiple articles titled with various statements to indicate mistreatment within the Nigerian royal family.
Oh, shit. This man is legitimately a prince.
What could a prince possibly want with Harry?
hey man
what can I do for you
I suppose you will not believe me as no one else will.
They doubt I am sincere because my English is no good.
I must use a translator to speak with you or you will not understand Tobit.
hey
no
ur English is seriously good dude!!
better than mine I’m ngl
Ngl?
oh shit sorry
wait pardon my language I didn’t mean to swear
ngl = not gonna lie
Ah.
Abbreviation?
slang
Ah.
We too have slang.
But it is different from yours.
so hey man, what can I do for you
you could clearly use some help
I’ll do what I can
I wish to regain my assets as they have been stolen by my father’s men.
To do that I must go through the royal court.
But to go through the royal court I must pay the fee.
Which would not be a problem if I had access to my funds but I do not.
It is a vicious cycle.
that sounds awful
you poor bloke
you like need some money or something
I haven't got much
how much you need
The royal court charges £5000 per trial.
It is so much in my currency. I have access to no funds.
If a kind man could help me with a loan, it would be much appreciated by me.
holy shit
five grand
mate I think you need to just leave that place behind
Nigeria is my home country.
I will not abandon my people like a coward.
I’m sorry
I didn’t mean to upset you
I just don’t like the idea of you being mistreated over there
I understand that you meant no harm.
But my mistreatment will cease once I am back in control of my assets - I can then regain my seat on my father’s council.
Harry sighs as he reads and rereads the messages from the prince. This poor guy. Harry thinks about how his dad is still in control of his finances like he was when he was a kid, but he still has all of the freedoms in the world. (Enough freedom to buy and crash a Lamborghini a couple months ago. Maybe his dad should be a bit stricter.) His dad merely helps him keep a strong head on his shoulders and prevents him from sending himself bankrupt. Gee, his dad even helped him find a shared place in England last year, always ensuring his rent for his London flat is paid on time. Man, he loves his dad. He should call him tomorrow, see how he’s doing.
Realistically, maybe Harry should wait and consult his dad about all this first. Get his wise and honest opinion on things. But, then again, if Harry was in Tobit’s position, he would hate to have to wait even a second longer for financial aid. He can’t help but feel deeply sorry for the man.
you got any UK details mate
or something like that
I don’t know how this works
I have accounts set up in multiple countries for trading.
My England bank is currently empty but it is the only one not frozen or stolen.
That is why I need your help.
k give the details pls
As soon as the account details come through, Harry adds Tobit as a payee on his online banking app.
“He needs five thousand pounds?” Harry says to himself, the question a disbelieving rhetoric. He exhales a worried breath out through his nostrils, his lips pursing in thought. Five thousand pounds is a lot of money. Money Harry isn’t sure he has, but he’s already promised the prince. His current balance is £3,467, and he doesn’t get paid for another week. It feels like he isn’t getting as much as he used to, either. (Copyright is a bitch… he just wants to include good music in his videos.) Most of his pay goes on his share of the rent for his flat, then food, then back into his YouTube videos.
But… he does have that savings account his dad set up for him a couple months ago. His dad supports his dreams, always has, but he can’t be blamed for worrying over the longevity of a career on social media. His dad set up the account, added an initial few hundred, then told Harry to contribute some so he didn't just have so many thousands of pounds lying around in his standard bank account. His dad has a strong fear of him getting scammed here in England, especially in a city like London.
With a sigh, Harry transfers over half of his savings into his main account. Yeah, Tobit needs £5000 for the court hearing, but surely he has other needs. His lip caught aggressively between his two rows of teeth, Harry quickly pays £5600 to Tobit. That should surely do the man.
I just sent you the money
gave a bit more than the 5 grand you were asking for
obviously I don’t know your food situation so
just in case you needed more
Thank you brother.
That is very kind of you.
I appreciate your help immensely.
Once I get back the supervision of my own estate I will return the favour.
And much more considering your generosity.
Harry feels strange. Something is wrong. He doesn’t quite regret his actions, but he can sense that this isn’t a very credible exchange. Maybe he shouldn’t have done this, even though Tobit is clearly real. He can’t be blamed for feeling sympathy for the poor guy.
(Young, dumb, and foolish will be the headlines of Harry’s prison articles. There is no way life is this good for him, your regular old joe from Guernsey.)