Chapter Text
Ice, water, iceberg, water, ice.
The sight you are granted every day is far from entairtaining to disinterested mind. View in South Pole never changes after all. There is only one season - eternal winter.
You don't mind it. Every time you are on deck, you can't help but look in awe on the ice that never melts, the gigantic icebergs and the blue water. It all is so wonderful and different from what you were used to. Like a peaceful artwork that stays the same.
Other crew members don't understand the beauty of this place. All red tones they enjoyed are replaced by blue. Great volcanos now are icebergs. The burns from sun are now only coldness biting your cheeks. It doesn't bother you, your veins are filled with fire making the cold unnoticeable.
You love the Water Tribe waters. Even if others don't see the appeal, you are happy to be the one to enjoy them. If you stay here for few weeks longer, you know that the climate of Fire Nation will be long forgotten. You hope that it will happen.
The climate is so opposite to Fire Nation, you can't help but enjoy it more. Even the almost non-existent fauna doesn't change your admirance. Maybe South Pole isn't granted with diversity in animals, but the ones that live here are still so beautiful. Foxes with their pretty coats, wolves that howl lullabies at night, silly penguins who always make your day better.
When you get tired from looking at the icebergs, you look in the water. To find the little fish swimming in harmony. It is difficult to see them, if you lean too far you might fall overboard, but that has never happened.
Fishes might not be anything special for others. They are far from intelligent organisms, but that doesn't make them any less important in this world. They still have their lives, their instincts, their little hearts. And they swim so gratefully.
'I wish to be a fish, a fish with no worries. Fish with no thoughts, these creatures don't even know what's happening in human world. I suppose they don't care.'
You know that fishes have their problems. They can be so easily killed. But they don't start stupid wars. All ocean is granted to them, they don't fight for it.
The water gets too dark to notice them. You look in the air again for icebergs hoping to catch a glimpse of something interesting.
Iceberg, water, more water, tower of light, ice....
Tower of light....well that is not the interesting thing you were looking for.
'It can't be what I think it is. But it can't be anything else. But what is the possibility of Avatar returning right today after a century...'
A view like this would make you joyful in any day. Secretly you had hoped for Avatar's return someday, ignoring the words of others. While everyone around you says that the cycle is broken, you try to not listen. Hope in silence for no one to hear.
Now that the saviour from war might have returned, you should scream in joy, jump around, celebrate. Yet, you only worry.
There is someone who believes that Avatar is alive too, but without the noble intentions. You hope he won’t see the lights in the sky, you hope he meditates in his chambers and won’t come out.
Why does the Avatar has to return right where you are? The whole big world, but they chose nearest place to you.
In the same place where Zuko is. If he sees that Avatar is alive, his fanatic obsession will grow to such lengths you can't imagine how life on this ship will turn.
"Uncle, (Name), do you realise what this means?" The voice startles you. How naive of you it was to hope that he didn't see such great view. Zuko isn't blind.
Uncle Iroh does not seem too keen on this too. Two peaceful minds think the same. "I won't get to finish my game?"
"That means my search has come to an end." 'An end, what end will be this?'
You don't know if you should talk him out of this or just laugh. "Zuko, those are northern lights. Why don't you calm down and enjoy them with us?"
Most stupid lie you've told. An idiot would even see that those lights are not just natural phenomenon. Earth just doesn't shoot gigantic lights from the ground.
You don't expect Zuko to believe you. "I know how northern lights look! This light came from an incredibly powerful source! It has to be him!"
And with this the peaceful days on this ship are buried down. Why can't Zuko just understand that he shouldn't go for Avatar. "Nature is enough of an incredible source for this."
Iroh joins you too. You know that he knows it well. You also know how much he doesn't want to go after Avatar. "I agree with (Name), we have been down this road before many times. I don't want you to get excited over nothing."
"Please sit, why don't you enjoy a cup of calming jasmine tea?" You let out a small giggle. He needs a whole bowl of calming tea and even then you are sure he will yell around.
"I don't need any calming tea, I need to capture the Avatar! We are heading there, guards come here I have to train!"
You have no interest in watching Zuko throw pathetic fire punches. Fishes are more interesting than that. They at least know what their purpose in life is and follow that.
'What are the chances that it really is the Avatar? Maybe it is something so unknown?'
No, nothing you have learned about creates such power. Only possible option is for it to be him.
'That Avatar could have been in Earth Kingdom. In Ba Sing Se where we would never find them. But no, here in middle of nowhere, right in front of Zuko's eyes!'
'Where even were they hiding? I suppose the Southern Water Tribe is good at protecting their Avatar. Or maybe they just froze Avatar in an iceberg. Yes, that definitely explains it.'
On one side the return brings you excitement. If everything goes smoothly, the war will end soon. Equally you feel pissed too. Very much. The Avatar has returned only for 10 minutes and already has brought so much chaos on ship.
The fishes in water have hidden too. At least there now will be a whole circus with Zuko chasing the Avatar. You don't want to imagine the lengths he will go for the prize. How is that even supposed to happen? Century old Avatar against sixteen year old Zuko.
A battle that you don't want to imagine. Would it be fair?
"Power and firebending comes from the breath, not the muscles. The breath becomes the energy in the body. (Name), demonstrate proper technique." Hearing your name, you are quick to turn around. It would be a lie to say that you want to do it. You aren’t here to show demonstrations to prince.
Because Iroh asked you so kindly, you cannot help but agree.
You breathe in feeling all your energy burning inside you. As you breathe out, it turns into release of huge flame that covers all the deck in fire before fading back into air. The action is nothing special, it’s basic. But done correctly it can bring damage to anyone.
Iroh looks satisfied with your technique. "The energy extends past limbs and becomes fire."
Zuko does not. In his frown you see it - he hates it, hates this comparison. His hatred becomes fire that comes right in your direction. That little fire ball is nothing, one way of your hand and it deflects back in air.
It does not harm you physically. Only your heart is left with little pain. You don’t want anyone to see that. "Such flame won't even cook a fish! Try harder!"
In every joke there is truth. The big fish Avatar won’t be caught if he fights like this. And definitely not by fire from an impulsive boy.
'How dare he even act like this towards me? I show him a good technique and instead of thanking me, he wants to start a fight.'
Pretending to be disinterested in this whole theater act, you turn around to ponder. While listening to every word behind you.
"Enough! I've been doing this all day. Teach me the next set, I am more than ready!" Now he needs to ruin Iroh's mood too.
This all is amusing. You chuckle to yourself. Barely bends fire but wants to become master. "You are too impatient, you have yet to master your basics."
"The Avatar is more than hundred years old, he has mastered all elements. I'll need more than basics to defeat him." Once Zuko is right. Even with his delusions he knows that there is no chance against the Avatar. But the dear 'honour' doesn't allow to drop his mission. "You will teach me advanced set!"
Iroh's witty response is to go eat. You would laugh about it even more, but you know who is the next in list when Iroh say's 'no'.
"Uncle refused to teach me, but you'll help me, right?"
He must be quite the optimist to seek help from you. You could agree straight away in the name of friendship. But do you gain anything?
“If uncle refuses, my answer won’t be different to his.”
”Please?”
You don't bother to turn around to see him, still looking away observing the snow. "You should have thought that before you sent fire my way."
Suddenly his hand touches your shoulder and your head turns around, forgetting the whole cold act. "Cut it off, it was just a joke. I don't have the power to hurt a great master like you. A great master who is also my only friend."
The good old flattery. The stupid flattery that makes you almost agree. Called you a great master and now your opinion will change?
'I can't just say yes to him. He has nor the patience nor the skills for this. But if he goes straight into fight with Avatar only knowing the same three moves, the result is predictable. He is right as a friend I should help.'
'No, he can't master firebending in one day. It takes years to master and he is clearly not ready...but he is my friend.'
The dilemma in you only grows as you look at him.
"You have to show that you are worthy to learn advanced bending." In your mind you have thought of a test. A one you don’t think he’ll pass. If a miracle happens and he passes, you’ll agree.
Zuko's eyes shine. "I'll do anything to prove that I am ready, you'll see-"
"Then look in the water and observe fish." You almost turn around but he manages to stop you.
"You can’t be serious? I have to fight the Avatar today and you think watching fish will help me!"
”If looking at fish is too hard for you, then I can’t imagine how difficult it’ll be learn advanced bending,” you smirk, “go and look for teacher in your level, Zuko.”
In some way you feel relieved that you don't have to teach him anything, but on the other side it makes you disappointed. He didn't even try.
"You know, you really are a fishead."
'A what...'
"A fishead?" An insult you didn't anticipate.
Zuko doesn't stop insults at that. "You really are just like the fishes you love to observe! There is nothing going in your head! Without ambition swimming around life! Everyone has goals, except you!"
'I have goals but they go further than war.'
So this is how he treats the one who got him this ship. Attacks with fire, insults and yells. Without you he would be swimming in fishing boat not on a ship.
"I made you look at fish to clear your head. And you definitely need that because you can't understand that you are no fit for battle with Avatar."
"I have to return back to Fire Nation, can't you see that!"
Fire Nation doesn't want Zuko. But he is blinded and can't see that. "Then good luck learning advanced firebending by yourself!"
You won't spend more time in this pointless argument. Choosing to leave him alone and return to your room.
There you will calm better. Surrounded by your candles, ancient scrolls, things that bring you joy. Things that make you enjoy your time here.
Today it's different. The room that usually brings peace, makes you even more angry.
'Stupid (Name), why did I refuse him? He'll go and try to fight that hundred years old Avatar, master of all four elements, with no skills. Doesn’t matter if he isn’t strong enough, that idiot doesn’t care.'
You start walking to one corner and back to the door. Repeating the action while your thoughts roam.
'If I couldn't change his mind right at start then obviously my refusal won't do a thing. He is too confident about himself, about his abilities. Oh, what have I done?'
You thought you had empathy. Turns out you don't. Capturing Avatar is a way home for Zuko. Way to get put back in line for throne, to find father's love again. Fire Lord might not love his son even if Zuko has Avatar in his hands. The scar on his eye is a reminder of that.
But it will make him again worthy. Something that he longs in life. You can't understand what means to be unloved by your parents. Knowing that they both are wishing for your return everyday, while Fire Lord is happy that his son is far away. You don't have to seek their approval.
Not in a way that Zuko does.
This banishment is an optional cruise for you while Zuko's future depends on it. And you didn't help him in any way. What kind of friend you are to throw Zuko alone in this?
He has different appeal to life. Dreams and love for his nation that you don't have. He is loyal to the land he was born to, which he was meant to rule one day. He dreamt of sitting on throne one day.
But you, you couldn't wait for opportunity to get away from the cursed nation. And you took it with your benefits in mind.
Yes, you did hope that Zuko's goals will change over time. That he will forget about Fire Nation and see other things in life. It hasn't happened yet and definitely won't happen tomorrow. Avatar's return only filled him with vigour.
And that spark of hope is not disappearing.
'No, I have to talk him out of this. Make him postpone fight. Say that he can catch the Avatar any other day.'
Zuko must be on deck. Trying to find his dear Avatar. You don't want to return there after that fight. Fishead is quite the insult.
Being on deck shouldn't be too uncharacteristic of you. You do spend most of your time there observing nature. It should seem as your room got too boring.
With the same quick steps you went inside, you are now again walking back there.
'How will I even say that? "Don't fight today Avatar, sorry that I refused to teach you but you aren't ready?”'
You don't have much time to plan the speech. As you had expected, he is still there. With telescope in his hands, looking for Avatar as if they were stars in the sky.
'What should I say to him? It has to be casual, very casual. We are still friends and that silly argument is left behind.'
"How it's going?" You hope your tone doesn't come too sarcastic. The last thing you want is to start another argument.
It doesn't seem that he is holding a grudge as he nudges you closer to him. Hesitantly, you step forwards. "I found him."
"Great!" This is far from great. That Avatar must have lost all sense of hiding.
That stupid Avatar should have stayed hidden. Or ran away to Earth Kingdom to find new resort. He shouldn't have stayed here. Even if this seems like the safest most remote place.
Zuko passes the telescope to you. "Look at him."
At first you can't find him. Looking more awkward and stupid. Zuko notices that and moves your hands in the right direction. With his help you see him. He isn’t only the Avatar but the last airbender too. Two returns in single day.
In your imagination the mysterious Avatar was either an old Water Tribe coward or a young unexperienced earthbender.
Maybe it is a good thing that he is from Air Nomads. They are known to be peaceful. You hope that it is the case for Avatar too, that in those hundred years he has forgiven Fire Nation for the genocide. That he won't be furious enough to take all the anger on Zuko.
Further there is a plain village. If Zuko decides to attack it, you are sure they won’t heal from it fast.
You hand back the telescope. "You won't hurt the village?"
"If they hand the Avatar, I won't." You sigh. What are the chances of Avatar surrendering? It’s more likely that Zuko will be the one to take white flag first.
'I have to say that now. If I don't, I won't have the second chance.'
"You don't have to fight him today," the words come out forced, seeing his confused expression, you try to elaborate, "better to stalk him for a while. There is no need to rush this. After all, it is important, you have to plan a strategy ahead. Think this through."
You can't read what is going in his mind, but you know that he is thinking in completely different direction. "When else will I get the chance? Don't you think three years was enough of waiting?"
"I thi-."
"I am tired of this life. To return home, I'll take every chance what comes. No matter what the possibilities are." You didn't even manage to say anything, but he is already leaving. What were you even thinking? To talk him out of this? To say it's too dangerous?
Noticing that you are not following him back inside, Zuko raises a brow. "We need to go get ready. Put on better armour"
'We?'
'Does he plan that I'll participate in this life wasting mission too?'
For all your life you’ve been a pacifist. Fighting the Avatar stands against every morale you have. Now Zuko thinks that you’ll throw your code out for him?
"Or do you plan to confuse them as Water Tribe peasant." 'Huh?'
At first you don't get the joke, but as you look at your coat it gets clear. The white fox fur coat that you bought before entering South Pole masks your nationality completely. The blue fabric is only worn by one nation. When you bought it, you didn't think too much about how you'll look - any nation can recognise a good style.
It really does make you stand out on this ship.
"No, I won't fight with you," at first I refused to teach him, now I refuse to aid him. I really make myself seem horrible, "I mean that it's your fight for honour not mine. If I capture the Avatar in your place, it won't be fair that the glory will go to me."
You hope Zuko understands your lies. It would be unfair for you to fight in his place. But without it, you don’t want to risk your life.
He doesn't answer to you, leaving you alone. You suppose he isn't mad? If he was he would say that. But more likely disappointed.
As you return to your room, you are disappointed in yourself too. Twice you tried and failed both times. And both times you refused to help him.
Now you have to accept the reality. He’ll go fight, then he’ll get tossed around. While you sit in your room and do nothing.
Not literally. In your room there is plenty to do. For example you could finally finish the painting you had started on the day you entered the South Pole. It's still standing in the easel, waiting for you.
Painting is a nice activity for spare time. In Fire Nation you could never pursue it, there were other things to do. But now in middle of sea, you can do anything. There is no mother asking you to attend singing lessons or father making you show off your new moves.
Here you can do what you like. The wolf who howls at moon, crying in loneliness would make a nice artwork in halls of your mansion. Only if you return....
It does resemble Zuko for a bit. Alone in the world, longing for a place to belong.
'How is he supposed to win the Avatar? I have helped him in no ways. And now he is on his way for battle, the ship will soon be there.'
Images of air getting sucked out from revengeful Avatar make you abandon the painting. With such scenarios in head no colours will mix. You imagine the helpless idiot going there and getting frozen to death. Or that the Avatar will make such sharp ice knifes that they cut him in half.
The gore in your head makes you want to throw up. No, you have to at least give him advice. Even if you don’t want to face him.
'(Name), this is your mess. And if you don't give him advice, you won't be calm. Few words. He might even appreciate them.'
Your thoughts are right. For which time today you go after Zuko only to stop in front of his room. It’s been a long time since you went there. Would it be awkward to visit? You both have been on this ship for so long, but the relationship has turned only for worse. Are you even the close friends you used to be?
With a sigh you knock. Whole three times. Maybe he won't answer or maybe he is somewhere else already.
"Uncle, you can come in!"
Zuko's room is opposite of yours. It's almost empty, only for the red flag to hang there, a humble mattress and few trinkets. The room has no energy of home. You wouldn’t call it a room.
In his armour he looks different. With his ponytail he seems like a dimwit, but dressed differently Zuko takes the appearance of a strong soldier. A little blush forms on your cheeks - if you had entered earlier it would’ve been very inappropriate.
"It's me," his head turns around, “ the whole time I have refused to help you in any way. The least I can do is share my strategy."
"Go on."
You didn't need that to continue, but at least he wants to talk. "We know that the Avatar is an airbender. It means he is really more than hundred years old. For sure he will have mastered all elements perfectly, but given the circumstances he'll use waterbending the most with air. Water attacks will be particularly hard for you, because that whole place is surrounded with water."
"Airbenders have more defensive, calmer fighting approach. That might go in your favour, but remember to be calm too. You have to think in this battle, you cannot aimlessly throw fire around."
"No matter that, we have to take that Fire Nation wiped his nation off. Pain from that might still be there, waiting to be unreleased. If something happens and his eyes glow white - retreat. It's not worthy to continue then, it would result only in your loss." You don't want to imagine how Avatar state would turn out.
Zuko listens to every word carefully. You can see that he is thinking along. "I thought you will encourage me."
"I am warning you. If Avatar state is triggered, there is a huge possibility for you to get killed. Many opportunities will come when you are alive, but dead man has none left for him."
"That's why you also have to think how you fight. As Iroh previously said, you have to breathe properly. Each time you release fire, you need to think in what ways to do it. The odds here are not in your favour. Be creative, throw him off guard, he is an old man, he won’t be that fast anymore. He hasn’t fought seriously for decades. I would not like for you to do it, but if it's the only option left then take hostages."
"That's all I've got to say." You really talked a lot. But you hope something of what you've said will be useful.
"Thank you!" To Zuko the advice was needed. Uncle had said some words, but your strategy was more insightful.
You let Zuko walk past you. As he leaves to fight, you are left alone in his room. You don’t want to stay there too long.
Quickly you return to your own chamber. Now in peace it is time to finish your painting. Surely, you didn't do that much, but at least you warned him. The few words won’t leave his head that fast. Maybe in important moment he’ll remember them.
More you look at the wolf, the more he resembles Zuko. Left alone to cry only to the moon. What is a wolf without his pack? Zuko isn't fully alone, but he might feel solitude. His own family has rejected him.
A pain you can't relate to. You've ran away from them on your own. Sometimes you think about them, it wasn’t their fault you ran away. There is ache in your heart when you imagine mother crying and waiting for a single word from you. Through, there is no regret. What could you even regret when you have world to yourself now.
With thoughts in your head, you mix the colours. The painting is almost finished, the wolf's fur only needing a little bit of colour.
'How is Zuko doing? I can't think of him, it will only harden everything for me. I-,'
The door cracks open and you don't get to see who the visitor is as strong hands come around you, pulling you in hug. Almost knocking down your artwork from easel in process.
"I captured the Avatar!"
When has been the last time Zuko hugged you? You can't recall, but you feel glad that it's happening today. The hug is far from comfortable, you are getting squished between him and your coach. But you don’t complain, you are more than glad to accept him.
"You are suffocating me." He lets you free to breathe.
Your head hurts in attempt to think what to say. To see your friend this happy is a rare sight. The thought what will happen next is not.
"I am happy. How did the fight go?"
'Was he really a craven like we thought who surrendered in a second. Or did his old bones not hold anymore? In any scenario, how was this even possible.'
"The Avatar is just a child. I doubt he knows more than airbending basics. He surrounded." The smile almost drifts away from your face.
'A child? We are sending a kid to the Fire Lord? To that tyrant. He won't even care if the Avatar is a kid. Spirits, forgive me for my sins!'
'No, I should stay happy. This is an important moment, I can't ruin it.'
You manage to smile. "Good that there was no fight. A child? Who could've expected that?"
"The ship is sailing back to Fire Nation. Imagine, after all these years I can finally return home. Father will be very proud to see me."
Mindlessly you nod to each of his words. You can't judge a child who seeks father's love. Even if his words are filled with naivety. You doubt his father will love him with or without Avatar. If he did, he wouldn't have sent him on this task.
"I am so happy." And yet again you are lifted from your coach to end in Zuko's arms. Pressed against his body like a little doll. Two hugs from Zuko in one day are more unexpected than Avatar's return.
"Is the Avatar in cell?"
Zuko’s eyes shine. "Do you want to see him?"
You do, but not now. "Did the guards take him there? I don't trust them with anything, they are little bit incompetent. If I were you, I would go there myself."
As Zuko leaves, you breathe in relief. The cheerful attitude started to become hard to maintain. You are sure that if he lingered around, your mask would have dropped and another argument could have started.
You are not happy. At first you were - Zuko is unharmed, he is happy you are happy. But the more you think, the worse this looks. Only hope for war to end is captured. Even more, the captured Avatar is a child. A child who doesn’t even know what will happen to him. You don’t know that too.
Now you are sailing back in this stolen ship to Fire Nation. This is not how the exile had to turn out. No house in Ba Sing Se, no more travelling. Soon you’ll return to the forgotten routine.
On positive note, you haven't spent that much money for it to be shameful. You are sure that father won't mind the few golds you took. He'll be more glad about your return and won't worry about the money.
You can’t believe that the Avatar is in ship’s cellar. Zuko never had any luck on his side. Except today. Maybe it wasn’t luck. Maybe it is only to turn for worse.
He won’t be any more loved back there. What luck could it be?
‘Is that even the Avatar he captured?’
It doesn’t take long for you to hear steps. Running steps. That are followed with yelling “stop” and more steps.
‘Has the Avatar already escaped. Oh, poor Zuko.’
The whole yelling does peek your interest. In truth it has been boring for some time. Maybe little action wouldn’t be that bad as you thought.
You decide to go to go check. This is your ship, if anything happens you have to take the risk.
The halls are empty. With only the metal door leading to deck staying untested. If a fight is happening it’s more likely to be on deck. In a huge space.
As you open the door, leading outside, you immediately close them. The sight was not what you expected. You didn't get to see much, but the gigantic water tower and the little boy on top of it was enough to understand you aren’t going there. Last thing you saw were the boys glowing eyes.
If Zuko was outside, then he is probably thrown overboard.
Avatar won't be in that state for long. He is a child, he doesn't have strength to be that powerful for long.
You try to listen what's going outside and when you can't hear anything, you open the door for second time.
There is the unconscious Avatar in young Water Tribe girls arms. A gigantic bison. And another boy from Water Tribe running around your ship, while the guards are frozen and Zuko is nowhere to be seen. Only mess all around you.
"What's going on?" The question comes out loudly. Not as you intended.
Turning attention to you. The boy looks at you, "Katara, look they have captured another waterbender?"
A waterbender? Right, your coat is confusing. Zuko was right, you could pretend to be a hostage.
'If I attack the Avatar, I'll be the one to blame for slaughter and fights. But I cannot allow them to cause more chaos here, they have to go.'
The fire you send in the boys way, was meant to answer his question, not for him to fall. Now you have only slowed their escape process.
"Leave!"
Your direction might not be that clear. The girl stands up and instead of running to her bison, she tries to bend water in your way. You dodge her little puddle, while the guard behind you fails. She is clearly unexperienced.
”That was all you’ve got, little girl?” The fire burns bright in your hands, “I wouldn’t fight with me in your place.”
This time you send another fire in empty space. To make them hurry. They have to leave before Zuko comes. You have to make them disappear.
"Leave my ship, you pricks!" While you send empty threats of fire at clear space, they all get on their bison. A magnificent sight as the animal flies away.
With fire you melt the ice to unfreeze the guards. For them to go after Zuko. He was barely hanging on anchor chains.
You expected a thank you, you did save him from falling in sea. He gave you his usual kindness. "I heard that all! You left them get away!"
Shouldn’t have yelled that loud at them. Now you can’t think of any lie to defend yourself anymore. If you lie, you’ll seem more like an idiot.
"What else was I supposed to do. Kill Avatar with lightning? I saw what that little kid could do! I don't want my ship to get destroyed!"
The two of you would argue more, but Iroh came here in time. "Prince Zuko, we can still manage to hit them down."
The three of you tried to make a gigantic flame that would take them down but it ended only for worse as the Avatar repelled it. The fire hit iceberg, cutting half of it down to fall and damage your ship.
This all just ended in broken bow, half dead crew and angry Zuko yelling all around.
"It's your fault they got away, fishead! I don’t understand how can anyone be this stupid to realise we need to return home."
“Sorry Zuko, I am stupid and I don’t understand!"
Maybe the friendship will never return as it was.
'The Avatar is free and so am I.'