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Life at South Park High School had its ups and downs. Being a small town, almost everyone knew each other from a young age, so it wasn’t too difficult to make friends. But the teachers tended to be fairly strict, and the amount of homework was borderline child abuse.
Kyle Broflovski was the model of a star student. From the moment he could walk, his parents, while well-intentioned, continually pushed him further and further beyond his limits. They were always pressuring him into getting perfect grades, as well as participating in extra curricular activities and sports. His life was basically filled with constant stress. On top of that, he almost always had plans with friends, so it was pretty rare for him to have free time all to himself.
Much of that time was spent daydreaming about one Kenny McCormick. He was, well, not a star student. He grew up in the poorest household in South Park, with alcoholic parents who argued all the time. Since his parents didn’t give two shits, it was basically up to him to take care of himself and his little sister, Karen.
Karen was basically the only thing preventing him from running away from home. Kenny felt that he had a moral obligation to protect her. She was only 11, and he couldn’t bear to leave her alone with his dipshit parents.
In light of all this, it shouldn’t be a surprise that school wasn’t really a priority for him. He tried just hard enough to scrape by, usually getting straight C’s or the occasional B-. Kenny also participated in extracurriculars and sports, if only to get away from his parents for a while longer. Based on his thin (malnourished) frame and lack of height, he played as runningback on the school football team.
Kenny was also a notorious playboy. His attitude was naturally flirty and many of his jokes were sexual in nature, so it wasn’t hard for him to attract girls. By 18, he’d had sex with almost every girl in his grade, and even some of the boys.
But with Kyle, it was different. Kenny was attracted to him, but not in a lustful, horny way. He held genuine feelings of love for the other boy, in a way he had never felt about anyone else. He didn’t want Kyle as a fling or one night stand, he wanted him as a boyfriend. A lover.
One critical problem with this was that both boys were under the impression that the other was straight. Kyle rarely showed interest in anybody at all, and when he did, it was only girls. Kenny had never admitted to having sex with any boys, and only bragged about the girls he’d fucked.
But at home, when nobody was looking, they daydreamed about the other, fantasizing about holding each other closely and getting to call each other their boyfriend. Since neither of them were open about not being straight, they both had resigned themselves to a life of pining and sneaking glances from across the room with cheeks dusted pink.
But all that would change on one late night.
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It was mid-December, right around the time students began counting down the days to winter break. It was also right around Tolkien’s birthday. Tolkien, being from an obscenely rich family, naturally held a massive party each year. It was very popular among the kids in their age group in the town, and was usually attended by almost everyone in the grade.
Tolkien’s parents didn’t really care what they did, even supplying alcohol sometimes. So, this party was almost always the craziest party all year. Naturally, Kenny was in attendance (with the not-so-secret intention of getting laid). Kyle was there too, but only at the insistence of Stan, who convinced Kyle that he desperately needed a break from the constant grind.
Kyle was one hell of a lightweight, so after one beer and a cup of spiked fruit punch, he was already tipsy. He was usually fairly introverted, but when he got drunk, he turned into a social freak. He’d strike up casual conversations with people he’d never even seen before, and click with them immediately.
As Kyle was walking around, he spotted Kenny, who was currently chatting up Bebe and Red with a drunken smirk on his face. He speed-walked over to him and tapped Kenny on the shoulder. He turned around, and his face lit up when he saw Kyle.
“One second, ladies.” Kenny said, before dragging Kyle over to the alcohol table. He grabbed two cans of beer, and handed one to Kyle, who shook his head and put it back on the table. “Nah. ‘M already drunk. Don’t wanna pass out.” he slurred.
Kenny just shrugged, and took the second can in his other hand. “More for me, I guess.” he joked, chugging both of them in about 30 seconds.
Kyle raised his eyebrows. “Don’t get too drunk, dude. If you pass out, you won’t wake up for 17 hours. Remember what happened last year?” Kyle chided. Kenny grimaced. “I’ll be fine. That was a one off.” he muttered, grabbing a Mikes Hard Lemonade.
Kyle knocked it out of his hand. “I’m serious, dude. Don’t get too fucked up. You’ll regret it in the morning. Or afternoon, whenever you wake up.” he scolded, his mom-friend tendencies making an appearance. Kenny rolled his eyes.
“Whatever, man. You’re no fun.” Kenny said, though his tone was teasing. Kyle smiled. “Good. Now, go get laid, or whatever you were doing.” he joked. Kenny smirked. “You know it, baby.” he said, before walking away.
Kyle knew he was just kidding, but the pet name still caused his face to turn red. God, why did he have to be in love with someone who would never love him back? Being gay sucked when almost everyone was straight. South Park was pretty progressive and accepting for a small town, but there still wasn’t that many kids open about their sexuality. Craig and Tweek were gay, and Marjorine was a trans girl, but that was about it.
Speaking of Craig and Tweek, Kyle saw them holding hands in a corner, and he smiled to himself, but also had a wishful look on his face. He wished that him and Kenny could have what they had. He swore that his infatuation had been getting worse lately, because nowadays almost all of his non-academic thoughts were about Kenny.
He sighed and looked away. He grabbed another drink to forget about his unrequited love, if only for a while. He drank the whole can in 15 seconds, but it didn’t take his mind off things. All it did was make his surroundings fuzzier, and his head pound harder.
He suddenly felt a familiar nausea building up in his gut, and he quickly ran upstairs to an empty bathroom. He’d barely even made it to the toilet before hurling everywhere, the contents of today’s lunch being ejected from his stomach. He panted as he tried to catch his breath. But the vomiting didn’t help at all with the headache. In fact, it made it worse.
Kyle splashed water on his face, before stumbling out of the bathroom, looking disheveled and sick. His head felt like it was constricting from all sides, and before he knew it, he collapsed to the ground, unconscious.
He was found a couple minutes later by Kenny, who was on his way upstairs to a guest bedroom with Bebe. Upon seeing his friend passed out on the ground, he immediately forgot all about her, and rushed over.
“Kyle? You awake, man? Helloooo?” he said, shaking Kyle. He didn’t wake up, only let out a pained groan and rolled over. Kenny sighed. “Sorry, Bebe. I gotta help him. I’ll be back out soon, promise.” he said, looking at her apologetically. She nodded and walked back downstairs.
Kenny scooped up Kyle with much effort, and carried him to an unoccupied bed. He laid him down on his side so he wouldn’t choke on his own puke in the middle of the night should he throw up, and put the covers over him.
He took a moment to admire Kyle’s beauty. Kenny had always adored the way Kyle’s auburn curls fell in front of his face and highlighted his jade-colored eyes.
Kenny felt a sense of longing deep inside his heart, but he pushed it down. Still, though, he decided he needed to stay with the other boy. To make sure he was okay, of course. Definitely not because he wanted an excuse to hold him or anything. Nope.
He crawled in next to Kyle, holding him close. He knew doing this was weird, and that Kyle would probably hate him if he knew, but he didn’t care. He just wanted to hold the boy he loved, if only for a little while.
After a bit, Kyle began to stir, and Kenny quickly released him, scooting away. But Kyle had already noticed. He’d been awake for a couple of minutes, but he hadn’t wanted to move. After he realized who was holding him, the hopes he’d had of Kenny returning his feelings, which he had basically given up on, came back even stronger than before.
He rolled over, looking at Kenny with a look in his eyes that the blonde could not discern. But it seemed that as quick as it had appeared, it disappeared.
”Fuck, dude… I passed out, didn’t I?” Kyle groaned, rubbing his temples. Kenny gave a sympathetic smile. “Yup. Right on the floor of the hallway. You alright? How much did you drink?” Kenny inquired, looking at his friend with concern.
“Not sure… it’s hard to think right now.” Kyle complained. Kenny patted him on the shoulder. “That’s alright. Do you need me to take you home? I can call an Uber for you, if you like. I mean, if you pay for it. Or I can just carry you home, or walk with you. Your choice.” Kenny offered.
“Yeah, I think that’s a good idea. Anything happen while I was out?” Kyle asked, looking at Kenny. He shook his head. “Not too much. I guess the most noteworthy thing that happened was that Clyde managed to drink 3 cups of the fruit punch in 20 seconds. He’s so wasted, dude.” Kenny laughed, and Kyle joined in. God, Kenny was so cute when he laughed.
Kenny smiled. “Alright, come on. Let’s go.” he said, extending his hand out for Kyle to get up. Kyle took it, rolling off the bed and standing up. He held onto Kenny’s hand for a bit longer than he needed to. He hoped he didn’t notice.
The two made their way out the front door, with Kenny having to keep Kyle from tripping multiple times. As they walked, Kyle wanted to ask about earlier so bad. Kenny had literally been cuddling him, of his own free will. It had to mean something, right?
Finally, he worked up the courage to ask. Kyle stopped, and turned to Kenny. “Kenny? Do you… like me…?” he asked, his voice nervous. Kenny stopped in his tracks, and swallowed. He took a deep breath, and met Kyle’s eyes. “Yes, Kyle. I like you. A lot. For years now, I’ve been in love with you. I don’t know if you like me back, but please, don’t let this ruin our fr- mmmph?!”
Kenny was cut off by a pair of soft lips against his. He froze for a moment. Was this really happening? Was he dreaming? But the lips on his felt too real. The electric, powerful feeling of ecstasy that rushed through his body as they kissed was too real.
No. This was as real as it got.
So he kissed back, their lips moving in unison. The world might as well have ceased to exist around them. All that mattered was each other.
Kyle was a better kisser than Kenny could have ever imagined. It all felt so perfect, like they were made solely for each other.
After what felt like forever, they finally pulled apart. Their hot breath turned to vapor in the wind as they gasped for air, the cold air of the night repelled by their shared warmth. They held each other on the sidewalk, not caring about who saw them.
“You have no long how long I’ve been waiting to do that with you.” Kyle panted, his eyes full of love as they looked into Kenny’s. Kenny giggled. “The same goes for you, babe.” he said, making Kyle’s heart flutter. He loved being called that.
As the two embraced under the winter moonlight, Kyle felt a bit of weight lift off his shoulders. Maybe this would make the toughness of his life just a bit more bearable.
And as for Kenny, he’d have a new escape whenever he wanted to get away from his parents. And what better way to escape than to be with the cutest boy in the whole world?
They both had their own struggles, but with them at each other's side, maybe everything would turn out alright.