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Cam couldn’t shake the feeling that something was wrong.
Very wrong.
It wasn’t himself that Cam feared for. He knew London well, having lived here since he was 12 years old. He was a strong, skilled fighter and there was little that this city could throw at him that would make him blench or blush. There were no signs of imminent danger or people following him — Joss Bullard was a ghost of the past.
And yet, Cam couldn’t shake the feeling that something sinister lurked in the shadows. Every part of his mind, body and soul was screaming at him to leave London and return to Stony Cross. There was a dull ache in his chest which had only gotten stronger and stronger the more time had passed since he left Amelia behind.
Cam had tossed and turned the whole night, seeing flashes of Hathaways in his dreams. Amelia had seemed upset and worried, tapping her foot as she spoke to the staff in hushed tones. He had visions of the sisters in their mourning clothes, informing him of the death of both Lord Ramsey and Merripen.
While neither scenario upset Cam greatly, he knew Amelia would be devastated. With no one to lean on, she had the weight of the world on her shoulders. She would mourn in private and put on a brave face for the sake of her sisters. Amelia was not one to share her burdens, no matter how much Cam impressed on her that he was willing to do anything to help. Cam knew that he should not have left her to face everything alone. However, he had to go to London. His return to the city had been planned for weeks and with St. Vincent away visiting friends, the club had been left unsupervised for too long.
Cam tried to go about his day with as much normality as possible. After checking on the current status of the renovations, he locked himself in his office all morning, hoping for some quiet while he finished the accounts and any other errands that needed to be sorted before he left Jenner’s for good. Today wouldn’t be his last day at the club – there were still a few weeks of renovations left – but once said renovations were complete, Cam was free. It was somewhat bittersweet but he knew it was the right decision. There was also a small, little part of his mind that knew if things didn’t work out for him, if he ever found himself in trouble, St. Vincent would welcome him back. It made leaving easier.
It seemed like a lifetime ago since he informed Westcliff and St. Vincent of his plans to quit Jenner’s and live life on the road.
Cam felt trapped in London, trapped in his life. It wasn’t an impulsive decision to leave. His soul was craving freedom, craving escape from the walls that were seemingly closing in on him. His gadjo half had ruled his life for so long and it was time for him to listen to the other half of him – the half of him that had brought Amelia Hathaway into his life forever.
It was a strange feeling, love. Cam found himself thinking of Amelia every second of every day. Until a few days ago he had really and truly believed that they would part ways for good. Cam planned to travel the world and find a new tribe to do it with. He was insistent that Amelia’s presence in Stony Cross has not served to accelerate his decision to leave but his heart knew that wasn’t the truth.
In just a few short days, everything and nothing had changed.
Cam still planned to leave his employ at Jenner’s, having now found his tribe – his Hathaways.
He knew Amelia needed help. Her brother was in no position to act as the head of the family. Cam had observed enough of Leo’s behaviours to know that he wasn’t likely to be on this earth for much longer and the Hathaway sisters would be left destitute and alone in the world. He couldn’t let that happen.
And so, it was left to Cam, the future husband of the eldest Hathaway sister, to step up and assume the role of patriarch. It was a mildly daunting task and he wasn’t sure how welcoming his new family would be at first but Cam knew he could win them over. At any rate, the sisters seemed to like him and Merripen had begrudgingly conceded that he would have the means to support the family. Cam had been so desperate to leave London and high society behind – only to realise he would probably need to stay. Amelia would be loath to stay at Stony Cross Park while the Ramsay estate was rebuilt and London seemed like the obvious place for them to reside, particularly if Poppy got the season she dreamed of having.
While this certainly wasn’t the way of life he had thought he would follow once he left London, Cam had surprised himself by realising was looking forward to it all. He wanted to be there for Amelia, he wanted to be there for her sisters. He had gone so long without a family and now that he found one, he was not going to let them go.
Which brought him back to the main thought in his mind.
Cam was due to return to Stony Cross in four days time. However, four days seemed too long of a wait – too far into the future. He wanted to leave and he wanted to leave now. He had unfinished business in London, but he also had unfinished business in Stony Cross – namely getting Amelia's answer to his proposal.
Sighing, Cam looked up at the clock on the wall. It was almost noon. The journey from London to Stony Cross took approximately 12 hours. If he left now he would hopefully arrive around midnight.
– –
Cam’s estimation of an early morning arrival wasn't too far off reality. By the time he had packed a trunk, organised a carriage, and informed select club staff of his plans to return to Hampshire, almost two hours had passed. He didn't bother to write ahead, knowing that he would likely arrive before any letter did.
As Stony Cross Park came into view, Cam felt an overwhelming sense of dread. He really did not know what news would await him upon his arrival. Part of him feared the worst but he could not let Amelia see that.
Despite his exhaustion, Cam wanted to find her and reassure himself that she was alright. However, he was happy to wait for her to wake. The last few days had taken a toll on her and she needed to rest, even if it was just another hour or two.
He exited the carriage and waited patiently as a footman knocked on the door to alert the staff to his arrival. The large door was opened by a young housemaid who bobbed a quick courtesy.
“Come away,” he heard a voice murmur from inside the house.
Amelia .
That was her voice, there was no mistaking it. He would know it anywhere.
As he stepped into the entrance hall, he saw two figures standing on the staircase in their nightclothes. It was Amelia and her sister Poppy. Poppy had already begun ascending up the grand staircase while Amelia remained frozen with her foot on the first step. There were obvious signs that she was tired and had not slept well, but Cam still thought that she was the most beautiful woman he had ever laid eyes on. They had only been apart for a few days and yet he had missed her terribly.
He felt himself smile as he looked in her direction. “It seems I can’t stay away from you.”
Amelia rushed over to him, almost stumbling as she desperately tried to reach him. Cam happily caught her with a low laugh. It seems she had missed him as much as he had missed her.
Cam moved to wrap his arms around her tightly when he felt her shake. He opened his coat and pulled Amelia close to him, but it didn’t stop her shivering. Can was beginning to suspect it was a result of fear rather than cold. He glanced over at Poppy who was standing silently nearby as the rest of Westcliff’s servants went around their business, preparing the house for the day. She too looked pale and worried although – and perhaps this was simply Cam’s imagination – she seemed to relax slightly when she saw her sister embrace him.
"You must have travelled all night,” Amelia said, burrowing into his chest. That was his Hummingbird, worrying about everyone else but herself.
He placed a soft kiss on the crown of her head. “I had to come back early. I left some things unfinished. But I had a feeling you might need me. Tell me what’s happened, sweetheart.”
Instead of answering him, Amelia began sobbing. Cam tightened his embrace, pulling her as close to him as he possibly could while also supporting her weight. He could hear Amelia trying to make herself stop crying. However, the sobs seemed to worsen each time she attempted to quieten them. Cam could only begin to imagine how long she had kept all of this emotion bottled up inside of her with no one to share it with.
In that moment nothing else mattered. His intuition had proven correct. Returning to Stoney Cross may well have been the best thing Cam had ever done. Amelia needed him and there was nowhere else on earth he would rather be. He gently took one of her hands and placed it over his heart, hoping she would be able to focus on the steady beats as he murmured reassurances to her.
Amelia made a feeble attempt to pull away from his embrace and stand on her own. Cam knew that she was pulling away because did not want to be seen as needing anyone's support. However, not wanting his public support was different to actually needing his support. He couldn’t let her go when she so clearly needed someone to comfort her.
“No, don’t pull away. I’ve got you.” Noticing that Poppy had begun retreating up the stairs, Cam shot her what he hoped was a reassuring smile. “Don’t worry, little sister.”
While his primary focus at this very moment was Amelia, he was here to look after all of the Hathaway sisters and do whatever it was they needed him to do.
“Amelia hardly ever cries,” stated Poppy. Cam had suspected as much although he didn’t dare voice that belief. The last thing Amelia would want was for her sisters to worry about her on top of everything else that had happened.
He ran his hand along Amelia’s back, hoping to sooth her. “She’s fine. She just needs…”
Cam paused. He wasn’t sure what to say. He did not want to be presumptuous and say that she needed him. But she needed someone and he was happy to be that someone.
“A shoulder to lean on,” Poppy supplied. Yes, that was it exactly. He couldn’t have put it better himself.
As Cam manoeuvred Amelia towards the stairs and sat down, he gestured for Poppy to join them. Amelia was still crying and shivering. She had attempted to say a few things since sitting down however Cam could not make any sense of what she was trying to say. If he was looking for any information about what had happened, Poppy was the most likely to be able to give it to him.
He pulled out a handkerchief, wiped Amelia’s eyes and nose and continued to hold her close.
“What happened while I was gone, Poppy? Why is Amelia so upset?”
“It's Merripen and Leo,” she explained.
“I take it Merripen’s recovery is taking longer than expected?”
“It seems he is not recovering at all. He has lost a lot of weight. Amelia checked his wound earlier this morning. I met her just as she was leaving his room. She said he wasn’t well. It must be really bad if Amelia is willing to say that.”
Cam silently agreed. “And what of Leo?”
“He's been missing for three nights. One of the maids informed us that he hadn't slept in his bed. We haven't seen him since.”
“Do you have any idea where he might be?”
“No. I-I’m worried he might be dead,” she confessed. “Or, at the very least he has done himself some harm. That’s why I'm awake, you see. Amelia and I were having terrible nightmares about him.”
So was I , Cam thought somberly. The situation wasn't as worse as he had feared but it was very close. There was every chance that Leo was already dead and Merripen would be quick to follow.
Cam quickly devised a plan in his head. First, he would look in on Merripen and assess the situation. There may be no point in calling a doctor. Once Merripen was left in the care of the Hathaway sisters, Cam could begin his search for Leo. He had found Lord Ramsay once before, he could do it again.
“There’s one more thing,” Poppy continued. “Some silverware has gone missing.”
“Beatrix?”
Poppy’s eyes snapped up to meet his. She was clearly surprised that he knew of Beatrix’s problem. “Yes, I’m afraid so.”
“Leave that with me, I’ll talk to her and make sure everything returns to its rightful place today.”
– –
Once Amelia had quietened down, Cam had reassured her that she had absolutely nothing to apologise for.
Seeing her so upset broke his heart. He would ruin a thousand handkerchiefs and shirts just to make sure she felt even the slightest bit better than she had done moments earlier. He would hold her while she cried every day and every night if he had to.
He didn’t want to upset her future, but Cam couldn't bring himself to lie about Leo’s fate. Amelia and the rest of the family did not need false hope. Instead, he let her know that he would be by her side, every step of the way. He would be her shoulder to lean on forever.
When Cam said that he would do anything for Amelia he meant it. If he thought for even a moment that the deadly nightshade would help Merripen he wouldn’t stop until he had found some. He hated the look on her face when he told her this particular plant wouldn't work. He wished it would, only because the alternative was far worse.
Cam knew the only thing that may help Merripen at this point was white lightning.
To use it would be risky. There was a chance that the white lightning would kill him. However judging by Amelia’s desperation, Cam deduced that Merripen was going to die regardless of whether or not Cam helped him.
He carefully lifted Amelia off his lap and placed her on her feet. Leo and the silverware would have to wait, he needed to see Merripen now.
Before it was too late.