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“You know, if you were here, I might even give you a hug.”
The silver stopper sailed through the air, Thor watching it tiredly. Mjolnir in the sky. Her shards on the ground. Silver then, silver now. Better than the dripping, blazing red that still painted his vision.
His hammer was gone, his home destroyed, his empty eye socket still agonizing - he had waved off the healers from doing anything more, insisting they focus on helping the people. His father was dead, mere years after his mother. His sister, too, by his own hand. He held no love for her, and he was no stranger to killing, but still: it weighed on one's body and mind. How Loki schemed for it, he both resented and admired.
Loki. His beloved brother. The only family he had left, and he was somewhere in limbo. Thor was certain he had made it out of Asgard before it was destroyed, he was far too crafty to die such an unceremonious death. It was a small comfort, though it did little to quell his worry at not knowing Loki’s whereabouts.
He could ask, certainly, but Thor doubted Loki’s apparition would have an answer. Maybe it would. He didn't always understand how these sorts of tricks worked. No matter how many times it was explained to him, he never remembered it like he did the rest of his lessons.
Magic had never been his strong suit, always Loki’s. Always his mother's. She had loved them equally, of course, but Loki held her favor in that regard. Fair, if not the preferable outcome - as children Thor had been jealous of him for it, but now, in the wake of their father’s secrets and Asgard’s destruction, Thor could admit the way Odin had favored him was not so equal. He regretted any fault of his own in making Loki feel unequal, like he had to prove himself with grander and grander gestures. He was certain it was as much an act to convince Loki himself of his own worth as it was to convince their father.
Part of him was saddened he'd never get to express such understanding to Loki. He felt at this point they owed each other an actual conversation, no matter how bad they were at it. Truly, they were very, very bad at it. Their chat before leaving Sakaar had been little but deception on both their parts, not near the endless things Thor wanted to say. The apologies, the accusations, the pleas.
The love.
Because it was as much an unfailable truth of the universe as it was a burden to it that Thor loved Loki. Despite everything they had been through, the betrayal, the death, the attempt on Midgard, he remained Thor’s brother, his best friend, his equal. And no amount of anger or mistrust or remorse would ever snuff that flame out. He felt it every time they were together. He felt it every time they were apart.
He missed Loki. No matter how many times they parted, he always found his way back to his brother in the end. Even when he mourned, he held hope Loki would turn up again beside him. It had been a constant for so long he could hardly bear to think it changed.
But he had to face the truth eventually, that this time felt far more final. Their final parting. The severance of that thread, more painful and empty than losing a limb. Or his eye. Unfortunately, he had more experience with one than the other.
“I might even give you a hug,” Thor said, and then did the opposite. Better this way, honestly. They'd never been ones for gentleness. Bickering suited them like a second skin. Besides, it wasn't as if Loki was really here.
The stopper arced, catching the light.
He really shouldn't have thrown it, he thought, knowing he'd have to fetch it when it fell to the floor, a mere fraction of a second before it did not, in fact, fall to the floor. He stared at it, held fast in Loki’s hand, and for the first time in what felt like eons felt a grin of pure joy split his face.
“I'm here,” his brother said, so softly Thor almost missed it. He might have said something else, but Thor heard nothing over the elated pounding of his own heart as he crossed the room and pulled Loki into a bone-crushing hug. Loki stiffened for a moment, then let out a shuddering sigh. Metal hit the floor with a harsh sound as Loki’s arms gingerly came up and around Thor too. Thor’s head slumped, pressing into Loki’s neck, and he felt his grip tighten as they breathed against each other.
Loki fit so well into his arms. He'd never noticed it before, his opportunities to hold him outside violence and death sorely lacking. They'd hugged often as children, never as adults. Which of them put an end to it, Thor didn't know, but he regretted it immensely.
He was certainly noticing now.
Loki's slender body tucked up against his, chin settling on his shoulder as his hands skirted over Thor’s broad back. He smelled like a man who had just been through hell, but Thor still buried his nose into his curls and breathed in deeply anyway. His back trembled finely under Thor’s arms, and Thor held tighter like he could ward off whatever made him shake like this.
Thor was content to stay there forever, or at least until someone came and pulled him away to his duties, but before long Loki began to squirm in his grasp and he stepped back before Loki could decide enough was enough and stab or bite him. He'd done so many times as children, back when Thor would pounce on him when he least expected it and not let go until Loki drew blood.
He kept a grip on his elbows, a nervous part of him fearing that if he let go Loki would slip through his fingers yet again, this time never to return. Despite his fear he couldn't keep the grin off his face as he positively beamed at Loki.
Loki’s nose wrinkled. “You reek, brother.”
“Yes, well, you don't exactly smell like Mother's garden yourself.”
“At least I've bathed recently.”
“I bathed earlier!”
“Not well, clearly.”
Thor rolled his eye and huffed. “Fine, then.” He made to step back and stopped when Loki made a panicked little noise and stepped with him. “We'll go and bathe together again.”
Loki looked like he wanted to protest but allowed himself to be guided by the arm out of the room.
Valkyrie had quietly shown Thor the Grandmaster’s “secret” bathing chambers after the healers had deemed him well enough to send off without further treatment. He'd cleaned himself perfunctorily before returning to make sure his people were settling in well. It was a simple matter now to retrace his steps, never letting go of Loki all the while. He could hardly stand to look away from him, too enraptured by the idea of them finally being together again. Once an expectation, then a novel dream, now… now perhaps a new reality.
“Is this what I'm to be subjected to forever now, or are you just drunk?” His brother mused, pulling Thor from his thoughts as fingers closed around his wrist and flexed. He looked uncertain, staring down at their connected hands like he couldn't decide whether he wanted to break free or pull Thor closer.
“That depends.”
“Oh, do enlighten me. On what?”
Thor shrugged, bumping their shoulders together. “On whether or not you'll poison my dinner if I say yes.”
“To what purpose would that serve me now?” Loki rolled his eyes. His fingers smoothed higher up Thor’s wrist. “Your friends will surely make me regret it.”
“You regret nothing, no matter the consequences," Thor said idly, tugging him along.
Loki stopped in the middle of the hall, nearly tripping them both. His jaw worked, eyes distant as he met Thor’s gaze. “I regret many things,” he whispered, as if the words burned his tongue, and Thor was struck so suddenly by the seriousness in his tone any response died in his throat.
They looked at each other for some time. In the distant halls, a burst of child’s laughter echoed. Both reacted as if they'd been shocked, startling abruptly and pulling away, looking everywhere but each other. Had Thor looked, he would have seen his brother's face burn as hot as his own, but instead he kept his gaze trained straight ahead and started walking again. A second later, Loki's footsteps fell in beside his, and a surprisingly gentle hand crept into his own.
The bathing chambers were still empty when they arrived. They were huge, truly, too much for Thor to need alone, and he resolved to inform the others of them tomorrow. Tonight, however, he wanted this peace. The only company he felt he could stand right now was his brother's, and Loki was beginning to look like he could pass out at any moment.
Loki did protest when Thor offered to help him undress, emptying his pockets of a truly comical amount of knives before finally undoing the numerous straps holding his ensemble together. Thor watched until Loki noticed his staring, then turned away hastily to undress himself.
There were a number of tubs and stalls, but they moved to the largest of the room as one. Loki sat on the edge of the tub as Thor ran the water, curious to the inner differences of Asgardian, Midgardian, and Sakaaran plumbing. He was distracted from his musings when Loki reached out and touched a thick scar on his thigh.
“That one's new," he said. Thor nodded.
“Just a few months ago.”
Loki studied it thoughtfully. “Perhaps you can tell me about it.”
“Later.” The water reached a suitable height for Thor to reach out and shove Loki back. He let out a very undignified noise that turned into a gurgle as he was submerged, popping back up almost immediately with a look not unlike a furious, wet cat.
“I,” he began succinctly. “Am going to kill you.”
“To what purpose?” Thor taunted, jumping in next to him to drown him in the splash. “My friends will surely make you regret it.”
“Then I'll shave your head in your sleep.”
That was a bit more of a credible threat. Thor covered his head protectively. “Touch my hair and I'll end you myself," he warned.
“But it looks so much better short," Loki snickered. Thor didn't dignify that with a response.
They bathed rather quickly, too tired to stay long. The hot water was less soothing than it could have been against their aching muscles and stinging wounds, but as Loki’s leg pressed up against his Thor felt he could have bathed in fire and been perfectly content.
Loki refused any help with his body but conceded to letting Thor detangle his hair, a task Thor took deadly seriously. He had to, lest he becomes distracted by Loki’s deceptively muscular back and wide shoulders.
When they finally climbed out, the water was starting to cool, and Loki's hair was pristinely clean and immaculately combed. They found what must have passed for robes for the Grandmaster and patted themselves dry, staunchly not thinking about what those robes might have been part of. Thor toweled off his own hair quickly, noting what he thought was the one singular perk of short hair to long hair, and moved to help Loki dry his own.
His brother surprisingly allowed it, though he had quite a few things to say about how rough Thor’s hands were. Thor finally just dropped the robe over his head and scrubbed as hard as he could, laughing as Loki flailed underneath it. He helped smoothe it back into place as an apology, though, once Loki finally freed himself from the robe’s clutches.
His hair was soft, even when wet. His skin was too. Thor’s fingers trailed down Loki’s jaw, wiping away the golden drops of water clinging to his pale skin. His brother’s eyes slid closed as he leaned into the touch, and he let out a soft hum. He held an expression of such open want, Thor couldn't remember a time he'd ever seen his precious brother look so vulnerable. It was almost unnerving. Just looking at him made Thor feel barer than actually being naked.
“You're beautiful,” he murmured before he could stop himself. Embarrassment flushed through him. He felt like a child, what reason did he have to be ashamed to give a compliment? He was eons past such behavior, especially to his brother of all people.
Loki’s eyes opened halfway, cheeks pinkening. His gaze searched Thor’s, but whatever he was looking for he didn't seem to find it. He cleared his throat. “One of us has to be, now that you've ruined your mug even further.”
Thor scoffed and shoved his head to the side, embarrassment giving way to pettiness. “I've always been the better-looking brother and you know it.”
“You do remember we're not actually related, right?”
“I don't hear you denying it.”
Loki kicked him in the shin with remarkable force given both of them were still bare as the day they were born. Thor grabbed and wrestled him, his grip slippery on Loki’s wet skin. They fought, laughing like children, sliding around on the soaked floor and banging limbs and skulls on every available surface.
Loki jabbed him in the side and Thor squawked, catching him by the wrist and waist and slamming him into the wall. Something in the shower chamber fell, but Thor was so stunned by the vision before him he didn't even notice.
Loki’s flushed face, stuck all over with fine curls. His chest, heaving rapidly, brown nipples hard in the cool air. Straggling water droplets, trickling down his abdomen and thighs, framing a perfect, hard little cock. Thor wrenched his gaze away and found Loki looking back.
They stared at each other for a long moment. Their chests heaved together, breaths mingling in the air. Loki’s gaze dropped to Thor’s lips, flickering back up almost immediately. His pupils were blown. He looked hungry.
Thor knew exactly how he felt.
They crashed into each other, mouths colliding with such force their teeth knocked together. They panted into each other, hands gliding over each other's bodies as their tongues slid together. Loki tasted of wine and blood. Thor’s head spun with the need to drink in more.
Thor nosed down his jaw, forcing his chin up so he could suck a bruise into his neck. It wouldn't last long, but he was so overcome with the need for everyone to see, to know, to look at Loki and understand Thor had him like this. His brother, his equal, his love. His Loki.
Loki’s nails scratched over his scalp, fisting his short hair to pull Thor’s head back and press their lips together again. “I take it back,” he groaned into Thor’s mouth. “The long hair was definitely better.”
“What changed your mind?” Thor laughed breathlessly. Loki’s slender fingers tugged again.
“Not enough to hold onto.”
“I'll be sure to grow it out again, then.” Thor’s hands ran down his chest, catching a blunt nail on a stiff nipple. Loki’s hips bucked against his. “Anything you want.”
“If I knew all it would take to get what I wanted was to take my clothes off and get wet, I'd have done it years ago.”
Thor licked across the same nipple, taking Loki by the waist to pull him in closer. “I can think of another way I'd like to get you wet," he smirked, and bit Loki’s pec when he was smacked on the back of the head. His brother was smiling when he pulled away, though, so instead of snipping back he adjusted his grip and hoisted him up.
Loki scrabbled at his shoulders in surprise for a second, eyebrows raising as he was lifted easily. Thor met him in another kiss, this time slower but no less passionate. Loki’s legs locked around his back and relaxed, allowing Thor to bear his entire weight between his own body and the wall. Their hard cocks slid against each other and they groaned in-sync.
“Should have done this before we bathed,” Loki hummed as Thor tried his hardest to lick into him.
“We're still in here,” Thor replied, muscles flexing as he rolled his hips forwards slowly and admired the way Loki’s head fell back and his eyes fluttered shut. “I'll clean you up again.”
Loki caught the tip of his pink tongue between his teeth. “You'll have to get me dirty first,” he purred, and Thor took the challenge for what it was and set about doing just that.
He would have liked to take his time with this, to lay Loki out and learn every inch of him in a way he never could when they were boys. To open him up on his fingers and tongue and cock, watch the breath flee his lungs as he was filled to the brim again and again. To show his brother how deeply Thor loved him, craved him, needed him. To find out what Loki liked, what he loved, what he hated. To give him everything he desired and more.
But like everything else in their lives, what Thor wanted and what he got were two very different things. They were both too exhausted now to draw this out, but too wound up to leave it like this. Thor could be patient if it would get his brother under him like he wanted another day. For now, he was content to have Loki like this, wet and naked and panting as Thor held him up and fucked against him slow.
His cock was bigger than Loki’s, he noticed as they ground against each other. Loki's was certainly prettier, though. A fitting continuation of their usual ways; his brawn and Loki’s beauty. Another day he'd find out how deep that beauty went, under the glamor that hid Loki's true self. Today he would count himself lucky to see him like this.
Loki, clearly displeased at not having Thor’s full attention focused on the present, bit his bottom lip and pulled, scratching his nails down Thor’s back and sending stinging shocks of pain up his spine. As payback he dipped the fingers of a hand between Loki’s thighs, pressing the tip of one against his hole. Loki bucked against it, but Thor pulled his hand away before he could sink it in.
“No!” Loki gasped, rolling his hips against Thor’s desperately. Thor shushed him gently, kissing his cheeks in apology.
“Later,” he promised. “Later I'll lay you down and fuck you like you deserve. Just let me have you like this now.”
“Fine, you absolute bastard,” Loki hissed, “but if you don't keep your word I'll fuck myself on you in your sleep.”
“Is that supposed to be a threat?”
“I'll make sure you don't wake up to enjoy it before I'm done.”
That was slightly more incentivizing, Thor had to admit. He kissed Loki again, cutting off his fuming, and redoubled his efforts to see his brother fall apart before him.
“That's it, brother,” he groaned out as their cocks slid stickily between their bodies. “You feel so good.”
Loki just moaned as a particularly harsh roll of Thor’s hips had him brushing against the sensitive vein on the bottom of his shaft. Precum leaked from them both, staining their abdomens. They really would need another bath after this.
Thor pumped his hips harder, letting go of Loki with one hand to shove it between them and take them both in his fist. He stroked them firmly, paying more attention to Loki than himself but still rubbing a thumb over his cockhead with each movement. Loki was rapidly falling apart in his arms, nails digging into Thor’s biceps as his moans pitched up.
“C-close,” he gritted out, and Thor pulled back to watch his face as he came.
The look of pure bliss that overtook Loki was the most beautiful thing he'd ever seen. Next time they did this he should bring one of the royal painters, if there were any left, to immortalize Loki in a moment of ecstasy forever. His brother was vain enough to probably enjoy that, and such a glorious sight was a shame to hide from the world. They couldn't have Loki, but they could see him, Thor thought. He would do whatever it took to keep his brother by his side now. No one else's. Only his.
The thought of it, of Loki belonging to him not out of obligation but devotion, had him joining Loki in painting their chests. A brand of their mutual passion. A mark that they'd forever be each other's.
Thor worked them through it until Loki’s moans turned to whimpers and his own sounds were tainted with overstimulation. He set Loki down, holding him up when his legs trembled, and quickly guided him back into the shower to clean them off as swiftly as possible. This time Loki did not protest Thor washing him down, or drying him off, or helping him dress. He did swat away his hands away when Thor offered to carry him back to his sleeping chambers, though, so Thor wasn't too worried he'd irreparably broken him.
They made their way back in silence, arms pressed together. Thor thought about finding Heimdall or Valkyrie and seeing if anyone else needed anything, but he trusted they had things under control and the ship was well on its way to Earth. Duty could wait until tomorrow. For now, all that mattered to Thor was Loki.
They stripped down again and collapsed into bed together, not even bothering to pull the sheets out and over them. Maybe in an hour or two they'd wake, still bare and groggy to tuck themselves in. They had no energy left now. All they could force their weary bodies to do was slide closer.
Thor drifted off, his brother in his arms, tired and pained and broken but for this moment content. Whatever tomorrow would bring would be dealt with. No challenge would be too great to overcome.
Not with Loki by his side.
He fell asleep with a smile on his face.
Never with Loki by his side.