Chapter Text
Living arrangements changed when Seokjin left for his enlistment, and the group decided it was time to move out of the group dorm. Yoongi and Jimin purchased a home on the outskirts of Seoul. The two agreed it was finally time to do so, considering their relationship was already public knowledge. Jungkook also moved out of the dorms and into the apartment he purchased a few years back, which was only used when his family would come up to Seoul occasionally. Namjoon, Taehyung, and Hoseok decide to stay together in a new apartment near Jungkook’s. Despite this, Yoongi, Jimin, and Jungkook often found themselves in the group’s new residence, whether for meals or to be in each other’s presence.
The fourth season of Bon Voyage in New Zealand plays on the television in Namjoon’s bedroom. The leader hugs an RJ plushie and sits cross-legged on the bed, watching the show. The scene on the TV is of Seokjin, Yoongi, and himself driving toward their campsite for the night.
The three had been singing songs from childhood as Seokjin drove and Yoongi DJed in the front seat, Namjoon seated comfortably at the back. Outsider’s Loner plays in the car as Seokjin rapped; the two rappers were impressed as the eldest expertly sang along to the song, a staple in Seokjin’s driving karaoke sessions.
Namjoon can only sniffle onto the head of the RJ plushie, one hand taking off his glasses as he wipes away the tears that fall from his eyes. The scene was one of the few moments of happiness the group had experienced in New Zealand before an invasion of their privacy shattered their world, and watching the scene only made Namjoon miss Seokjin more.
Seokjin leaving to enlist in the military affected the group harder than they initially thought a few weeks prior. Many plates and glasses were broken as Namjoon tried to venture into the kitchen without Seokjin’s guidance. Hoseok was relegated to cleaning up after the leader’s mess and ensuring he did not hurt himself whenever he would deny Yoongi’s offer to cook. Namjoon didn’t think the eldest rapper’s cooking was terrible - it was one of the most comforting meals he could eat. Yet, Seokjin’s missing presence in the kitchen did not feel right to Namjoon.
The rest of the members walked on eggshells around Namjoon in the first few days of Seokjin’s absence. The leader was highly irritable, locking himself up in his room as he cried for hours on end, only leaving when he would head to the studio to work on the finalizations needed for their album. They didn’t know how to deal with Namjoon and his unspoken feelings towards Seokjin, towards their eldest, with whom they wouldn’t be able to live together for eighteen months. The group worries if Namjoon will be strong enough to last eighteen months of uncertainty, of eighteen months of hoping that Seokjin still has the same feelings for him. Still, through time, Namjoon proves to them that he is capable.
Namjoon starts eating dinner with the rest of the group two weeks later, talking to the boys about the songs he wrote in his studio, most of which are for Seokjin. Jimin teases Namjoon that the rapper could probably release a solo album filled with love confessions, and the elder can only blush, knowing full well that he could if he wanted to. Their home does not sound the same without Seokjin’s voracious laugh echoing through the walls. Still, the boys learned to cope and tried to live their lives to the fullest, with looming enlistment dates at the back of their minds.
Hoseok finds Namjoon in a tearful state in his bedroom. A pained smile broke on the dancer’s face as he watched their leader bury his face in his RJ plushie. Namjoon only notices Hoseok’s presence when he feels the weight of his bed shift when the dancer climbs on, crawling towards the leader and taking him into a tight back hug.
“Joonie, when’d you get home?” Hoseok asks, nuzzling his face on the leader’s shoulders.
“A few hours ago,” Namjoon murmured– “had to write my speech for later.” The leader groaned, snapping out of his moping when he remembered the press conference for the group’s latest album that he needed to prepare for
“Did you even sleep?” Hoseok pouts, ruffling the leader’s hair, brows knitted together in concern.
“I took a nap before writing my speech. What time is it?”
“Almost ten. We have to leave and head to the company now. Will you be okay, Joon?”
Namjoon’s been asked many times by his members if he’ll be okay with not having Seokjin beside him, and the leader always says yes. He tries his best to be okay, but his members know better. They know that Namjoon has been extra sentimental, tearing up every time Seokjin’s face comes up on whatever old content of theirs that he rewatches instead of getting eight hours of quality sleep.
“I’ll try. I have to; our ARMY needs this - needs us.” Namjoon says as he slowly pulls himself up from his bed, carefully tucking Seokjin’s stuffed RJ into the blankets and turning off the television before leaving his bedroom with Hoseok.
The press conference went smoothly despite Namjoon’s nervousness. The leader expected most of the questions to be asked about the album they put out without Seokjin. Yet, most interviewers probed about Yoongi and Jimin’s relationship instead. The couple was gracious enough to tell the press about their planned projects. Being pioneers of LGBT representation in the Korean idol industry, it was their responsibility to use the platforms afforded them to promote the community’s acceptance.
Questions about Seokjin were also asked, and Namjoon tried his best not to break in front of the press. Hoseok and the rest of the members answered the questions about their eldest member for him. Namjoon knows he should speak more; he is their leader, after all. Yet he cannot bring himself to talk about Seokjin like he is just a coworker, a fellow member of a boy group, when he is something more. The leader’s hands shake every time he speaks, scared of slipping and revealing his feelings for Seokjin. Sensing his discomfort, his members ground him - Jungkook and Jimin held his hands, squeezing them underneath the table.
ARMY’s reaction to the album is positive despite Seokjin’s absence. Namjoon sleeps a little better, knowing their fans still have their backs. Their fanbase unapologetically consumed and appreciated the art they created. The two-week promotions and interviews they did for the album breezed through. Before Namjoon knew it, he was standing on stage with five of his members, holding a three-day farewell concert in Jamsil Stadium, closing off a chapter of their colorful careers. The group knew the day they would pause their activities would come along, but it was still painful to let go of the stage. With their enlistment dates, they decided to say goodbye, temporarily, in the best way they possibly could.
The month of uncertainty finally ends when Namjoon can talk to Seokjin as the rest of the group prepares for their last concert as six members until they return as seven after the end of their respective service. Seokjin’s call comes in the middle of dance practice, Namjoon holding in a scream when he sees the eldest member’s name on the caller ID.
“Hyung, oh my God, you finally called!” Namjoon shouts as he answers the call. The other members quickly gather around him as they, too, want to hear the voice of the eldest that they have badly missed.
“I’m a survivor, Joon. I regret enlisting at this age.” Seokjin complains, Namjoon laughing at their eldest’s antics. “ Everyone here’s younger and stronger than me, and my back hurts daily.”
“I missed you so much, hyung,” Namjoon whispers, holding back his tears. “I didn’t think I’d miss you this bad.”
“I missed you too, Joon. I missed all of you.” Seokjin assures. “Can you put me on speakerphone? I wanna talk to the boys for a bit.”
Namjoon quickly puts the call on speakerphone, the five voices of his members merging into one as they greet their eldest, asking him about his basic training, if he has been sleeping well, and how his platoon mates have been treating him.
“Geez, slow down, kids.” Seokjin laughs. “I promise I’ll give you all the juicy details soon, but I only have a short time to chit-chat because I have to return to work quickly.”
“Promise you’ll call again, hyung, okay? Don’t be a stranger to us. Message and call us when you can, please.” Namjoon asks, and Seokjin can only laugh on the line.
“I will, of course. I miss you, Bangtan.”
“We miss you too, hyung. Stay safe, please.”
After Seokjin says goodbye, Namjoon excuses himself to the bathroom, locking himself into a stall and crying. Hearing Seokjin’s voice now only made him miss the elder more than he thought he could. Namjoon wants to see Seokjin badly and spend another night with him, limbs tangled together as they explore each other’s bodies in the darkness before dawn. He pines for Seokjin, for the eldest’s companionship and the laughter that he brings into his life – into their life. He knows he’ll see Seokjin in a few months; their hyung will be granted his first vacation out of the camp after four months of service. Namjoon knows that he and the rest of the members would be the first in line to greet their eldest. However, seeing Seokjin for only a day or two is far from the eldest’s constant presence in their years together.
Yoongi finds Namjoon crying in the bathroom. The older producer only shakes his head as he helps Namjoon up from the bathroom floor where he had been slumped.
“Joon, what’s wrong?” Yoongi asks as he helps the younger producer, handing him a handkerchief to wipe away his tears.
“I miss Seokjin-hyung so bad, hyung. Hearing his voice made me miss him more.” Namjoon bawls. “I didn’t think I’d miss him this bad, but I do.”
“You’ll see him in less than three months, and now that his basic training has ended, you’ll be able to talk to him more often.”
Not hearing Seokjin sing his infamous parts in their songs was unnerving for Namjoon in their first few rehearsals. He knows Jimin, Taehyung, and Jungkook are capable enough to make up for Seokjin’s absence. Yet it still does not sit right with him, knowing that their eldest would not be on stage with them. Namjoon did not want to perform their solo songs, knowing that Seokjin could not perform Moon. Yet, the group insisted on giving the fans one last taste of all the pieces they put out as seven in the album. Namjoon knows now that Moon was written by Seokjin for him, and something breaks in the leader every time the song is mentioned between rehearsals.
Namjoon thinks he might be losing his mind when he hears the first chords of Moon as he exits the stage for the VCR that plays before Jimin and Taehyung’s solo performances.
It must be the nerves mixing with his longing for Seokjin , Namjoon thinks as he rushes through the dimly lit backstage. But the loud screams that ring out above the stage and their ARMY’s sudden chant of Seokjin’s name prove he is not imagining hearing the song. The leader debates whether he has the time to call the concert director to scold the sound technicians for deviating from the planned concert flow. Yet the expectant looks of his members as he enters the dressing room catch Namjoon off-guard along with Seokjin’s singing that sounds like he is there in the venue with them, standing above the stage.
“Namjoon-hyung, look.” Jimin calls out as he puts on the final touches to his costume, the dancer nodding towards the TV screen in the dressing room.
Namjoon finally sees what the fuss is about. Instead of the VCR that plays between his and Jimin’s performances, the screens on stage show a pre-recorded video of Seokjin performing Moon. The eldest’s hair is still long, past his shoulders, as he prances around a Little Prince-themed stage with dancers wearing animal masks. Seokjin is dressed like the story’s main character - a pink ensemble that makes him look soft as he sings about how he is the Moon that looks after the Earth.
“Why didn’t you tell me that hyung prepared a performance for Moon?” Namjoon breaks into tears, and the group’s makeup artists quickly hand him tissue paper to wipe away his tears. “When was this filmed? Why didn’t I know about it?”
“We wanted– I mean Seokjin-hyung wanted to surprise you, hyung. We don’t know when he filmed the performance, but everyone in the company knew about it.” Hoseok explains, the dancer teary-eyed at his best friend’s reaction to the surprise.
“God, you should’ve told me so that I could have spared our makeup artists the extra work of reapplying the makeup I cried off.” Namjoon pouts, the rest of the members chuckling at their leader’s complaints.
“It wouldn’t be a surprise anymore if we told you, hyung. It’s more special this way, right?” Jimin comments, earning a playful smack from Namjoon.
“Send me a copy of hyung’s performance. I’ll cry more over it later when we finish the concert.”
Namjoon does cry over Seokjin’s pre-recorded performance of Moon for several nights after the group’s temporary farewell concert wraps up. The leader tries to be quiet when he cries to avoid the concerned knocks of his members on his door when his cries ring through the apartment. Yet, he cannot stop the torrent of emotions that escapes his body every time he watches their eldest, his future lover, perform the song he wrote for him.
Whenever the members found Namjoon bawling while watching Seokjin’s performance, they silently sat beside their leader. Some members would wrap their arms around Namjoon and pull the leader closer for him to cry on their shoulders. Still, Yoongi knows Namjoon the best, sitting side by side with the leader and allowing his presence in the room to be enough comfort for the man who had often shied away from physical affection.
“Hyung’s probably done with work today. He calls around this time, doesn’t he?” Yoongi asks, handing Namjoon a pack of tissues.
“Yeah, I probably should stop crying so that he and I could talk about actual topics I want to bring up, and he won’t just spend his 30 minutes trying to decipher what I’m trying to say through my tears, right?” Namjoon jokes and Yoongi can only shake his head, scoffing at the younger producer’s answer.
“We know it’s been hard for you these past months, but how hard is it?” Yoongi suddenly asks out of nowhere, surprising Namjoon.
“I don’t know how to explain it, hyung.”
“Try, you’re a poet.” Yoongi encourages. “You know how to put your feelings into words.”
Namjoon is silent for a while as he gathers his thoughts. He thinks of what has occurred in recent months without Seokjin’s consistency by his side, and his heart aches for the man he did not have enough time with.
“It’s exhausting, hyung. I’m tired of watching our old content, of listening to Jin-hyung’s songs to have his presence in my life, even through a screen or song. I’m tired of staying up and wondering if he’s safe. I wonder if his platoon mates treat him right or if he’s doing well in his work.” Namjoon finally says, a deep breath leaving his body and verbalizing some of the internal turmoil that had been filling him for months. “I’m tired, but I’ll be patient because I know I’ll see him soon, even just for a day.”
Yoongi is quiet as he mulls over Namjoon’s words. The older producer was next in line to enlist, his date set after he and Jimin commenced the small world tour they planned for the collaborative album they were about to release.
“I asked because I was curious if Jimin might feel the same way you feel when I leave in November.” Yoongi shares, surprising Namjoon.
“I think he’ll be stronger than me in waiting for you, hyung,” Namjoon assures. “He isn’t as emotionally charged as he was in the past.”
“He isn’t, but I’m still scared. I’m scared for him, I’m scared for myself, and I’m scared for us.” Yoongi confesses. “What if something happens while I’m away? What if something happens to us while we’re in camp?”
“Whatever happens, we’ll still get through it, hyung.” Namjoon reasons. “You’ve been through the worst. I don’t think enlistment would easily deter you.”
-
A month after the group’s temporary goodbye concert, Jimin and Yoongi released their collaboration album, Min. On the last day of the farewell concert, a VCR was shown after the end of the show: clips of Jimin’s welcome back party in Busan after he was released from his three-week in-patient treatment, Yoongi and Jimin working together in the rapper’s studio, and short glimpses of their domestic life in Busan and in the group’s dorms.
The reaction was overwhelming, with their names trending on social media for days. Yoongi and Jimin received all sorts of messages when the first teaser photo for the album was released a few days after the concert: their hands intertwined on a piano. The couple was the talk of the town, and Jimin and Yoongi went on many interviews, both in Korea and abroad, promoting their album.
In Korea, Jimin and Yoongi were often asked why they decided to officially come out as a gay couple in an industry that was still homophobic. Yoongi answers the question gracefully, telling reporters that he and Jimin want to set good examples for the LGBT youth who are scared of being true to themselves because of the homophobia and transphobia that take place in the country. Yoongi and Jimin’s promotions do not go without difficulties. The talk shows and variety shows they come to in Korea may seem light-hearted. Still, behind the scenes, the couple cannot help but overhear some producers and staff members from entertainment companies judging the couple for their “Western, hedonistic lifestyle.” In moments like these, Yoongi wants to approach the naysayers and prove there is nothing wrong with being a gay idol in the K-pop industry. Still, Jimin reminds him to hold back, for everything they do will reflect on the LGBT community of Korea, whether it be good or bad.
“I’m scared,” Jimin mentions to Yoongi the night before their album’s release as the two lie in a hotel room in New York. Before their three-month world tour began, the couple flew to the States for a week of album promotions on late-night variety shows and morning shows.
“Me too, love.” Yoongi answers, rolling over to face Jimin, who cuddled him. “I’m scared of what everyone will think when they finally read the lyrics of our songs.”
“It’s wild how we started working on this after I was released from the facility. We were so confident that we wouldn’t give a single fuck about what people thought about our truth.” Jimin says. “But now that we’re here, in the States, about to start our tour, I’m so scared and nervous. Are we doing the right thing, Yoongi?”
Yoongi likes to think that he and Jimin are doing the right thing by taking control of their narrative and lives after their privacy was ripped away from them by someone they once trusted. Yoongi also knows that once the album is out, he and Jimin will become symbols of another vital cause. Bangtan has always been known as a group that promoted mental health, and now there are new causes to give importance to– LGBT rights and representation of people with Carrier Syndrome .
“We’re doing the right thing. We’re being honest about our truth; in the process, we give a voice to the people who deserve to be heard.” Yoongi assures.
“When you say it like that, I feel more pressured than relieved.” Jimin jokes, which earns an eye roll from Yoongi. “But kidding aside, I hope what we feel is right does turn out to be correct, hyung.”
The moment the album drops at midnight in New York, the couple’s phones blow up with notifications from the members, their families, and the people they worked with to bring the album to life. The couple’s hearts are thankful for the support, replying to as many messages as possible before jetlag takes them over.
The following morning is a whirlwind of activity, the couple getting ready in their hotel room at noon to film an episode of a late-night variety show. It had been twelve hours since the album’s release, and the couple was pleasantly surprised that it topped the charts in many countries. Jimin and Yoongi put out the album not for commercial gain but to explain themselves to the world that judged them for being honest to themselves.
“Oh, wow. Look, hyung, Billboard wrote an article about the album, saying that it’s one of the most raw pieces of work they’ve ever encountered in the 21st century.” Jimin announces excitedly, passing his phone to Yoongi, who scrolls through the article.
“That’s high praises, Jimin. I’m glad the response has been positive in the past hours.” Yoongi replies, but he cannot help but frown when he scrolls down to the comment section and reads racist and homophobic remarks towards him and Jimin. Yoongi does not let the comments get to him; he and Jimin spiraled after their relationship was revealed without their consent to the public due to the many think pieces and hate comments they received that they kept to themselves. Now, the couple knows they must pull away when the comments get too much, and they constantly communicate with their therapists to discuss the unsolicited hate they received from the public.
“Now that it’s out, I feel relieved,” Jimin whispers. “I can’t wait to meet ARMY when the tour finally starts.”
“I can’t wait to meet them too.”
Preparations for the late-night show go by in a flurry. Before they know it, Jimin and Yoongi sit side-by-side, hands intertwined across from the show’s host in a packed studio filled with ARMY that came to watch their guesting. An interview, a game segment, and a live performance of Jimin and Yoongi’s lead single are set to be filmed, and it was decided that the interview would be filmed first. The couple are all smiles as they talk to the show host with the assistance of a translator. The two are not pressured, for it had been a show that they, as BTS, had come to previously.
“BTS’ Suga and Jimin, boyfriends and the first publicly out LGBT couple in the K-pop industry. How does it feel being able to hold hands in public?” The host asks, to which Jimin answers.
“We feel honored to become symbols of hope in an industry still known to be homophobic. We all know how Yoongi and I’s privacy was disrespected when a stalker leaked our private lives. It was a harrowing experience that we continue to heal from. Still, it feels relieving to finally be honest about who we are and to finally be able to show my love for my partner without fear of slipping up.”
“But it also feels pressuring sometimes. Everything we do reflects on the LGBT community in Korea and other idols who may eventually want to come out and be true to themselves.” Yoongi adds. “But Jimin and I are trying to handle this new responsibility gracefully.”
“I’m glad to hear that.” the host smiles. “Now, let’s talk about your new album, Min. First, tell me why it’s titled this.”
“We couldn’t think of any other way to show that this album was a product of our experiences, so we chose Min, the common syllable in our names,” Jimin replies.
“Before filming, I got to sit down and listen to the lead single, Indigo Sky, and I want to tell you that I honestly teared up.” the interviewer comments. “It’s such a good song, I promise.” The host says, and the couple can only gently smile at his praise.
“Thank you. It means a lot to us that you liked Indigo Sky. It’s an acoustic ballad, completely different from the works I’ve released as Agust D, dedicated to our late daughter, Bora.” Yoongi explains, glancing at Jimin, who is trying to hold back tears at the mention of their angel. “It’s the first track that came to life during my solo retreat. When Jimin and I reconnected, I showed him the song, and we decided to work on it.”
“Before anything, I’m very sorry about your loss, and I want to say that I admire your strength, the both of you.” the host compliments. “It takes a lot of guts to release a delicate and heartfelt piece like Indigo Sky. You did it with so much grace.”
“Thank you. We thought it would be fitting to be the title track because it summarizes the hard times we had gone through.” Jimin says.
“I see. Well, let’s move on to lighter topics now.” the host announces, smiling toward the cameras. “Min has ten songs, with genres ranging from hip-hop to folk. What was the creative process like considering that this is Jimin’s first time working on an album outside of the BTS discography, and this is also the first time that you, Suga, are collaboratively working on a full album?”
“Well, it felt weird with just me and Yoongi in the studio,” Jimin comments. “But it was still lovely to receive feedback from our other members even if they’re busy with their own things.”
“It felt natural since I did work on the beats on my own initially,” Yooni adds. “Jimin and I are meant to be, not just as a couple, but also to work on music together.”
The audience swoons at Yoongi’s response to the question, and to return the compliment, Jimin coos and gently kisses Yoongi’s cheek. Yoongi freezes at the public display of affection, for it is the first time Jimin has kissed him in public, albeit on the cheek, ever since they came out. Yoongi cannot deny that it felt so good to finally publicly display their love for each other, regardless of how big or small the gesture may be.
The interview portion of the late-night show guesting wraps up, and Jimin and Yoongi are given a ten-minute break before filming the game section.
“How do you feel?” Yoongi asks Jimin, handing the younger man a bottle of water that had been passed to him by their manager.
“Relieved,” Jimin replies, taking the bottle from Yoongi. “The audience seemed to empathize with our story.”
“I noticed you teared up a little earlier. Are you okay?”
“Yeah. Just got choked up a little. I’ll be fine in a bit.”
“If it still bothers you, we can discuss it later when we’re all done, okay?”
“Okay.”
The filming of the game portion is uneventful, the couple smiling their way through a revised version of Song Association. Yoongi does not entirely understand the game’s rules, but Jimin is competitive; the younger dancer enjoys the activity and the audience’s reaction to his hilarity with Yoongi. When the segment ends, the two are whisked back to the dressing room to change costumes for their live performance of Indigo Sky. Yoongi tunes his guitar one last time before he and Jimin are called back to the studio. The setup for the song is simple: two wooden bar stools facing each other with a mic in the middle and graphics of pink, blue, purple, and indigo swirling on the LED board in the background. The couple requested for their Indigo Sky setup to be simple, the charged emotions of the song being the sole focus of such. Jimin cannot help but tear up as he sings the song dedicated to the daughter they lost, the dancer wiping away his tears as the talk show host approaches them to promote their album and tour one last time. Yoongi holds Jimin’s hand after the performance, a silent understanding of the turmoil that escaped the younger dancer.
Yoongi and Jimin do not go without the support of their members, who have each gone their ways in the break they take to fulfill their duties as able-bodied Korean men. Namjoon is now the primary producer for Tomorrow by Together, Bangtan’s junior group. Hoseok joins forces with Son Seungdeuk, the group’s choreographers, to create dances and performances for other idols under their label. Taehyung was cast in a mystery drama as one of the lead roles. Jungkook travels the world to seek inspiration for the album he plans to release before he enlists. Despite the time difference and distance between them, the members still do not fail to keep up to date with the couple’s promotions for their album, promising to attend one or more of the concerts Jimin and Yoongi will hold as the two become the first two members of Bangtan to have a world tour on their own.
The concerts are nothing like the massive shows they’ve done as BTS in the past. The performances are more intimate now, held in musical venues where legends once performed. There are no pyrotechnics or LED boards, only Jimin, Yoongi, a guitar, a piano, and their touring band with them on stage. Jimin and Yoongi perform not only the songs on Min but also songs from Yoongi’s works as Agust D, their solo songs from their BTS discography, and some group songs they have deemed necessary to their story, like Nevermind and Young Forever. In between performances, the couple converse with their fans, who ask them questions about their relationship and the struggles they’ve gone through in the past year. Jimin and Yoongi tear up on some shows as they remember their pain. However, it is cathartic to come to terms with their past among those who continue to love them despite everything that has happened. The couple always returns to their accommodations with full hearts, grateful to be themselves before their beloved ARMY and be one soul with the people they love the most.
During the tour, Yoongi and Jimin receive messages from idols back home in Korea. The younger singers tell them that they look up to the couple and that Jimin and Yoongi have inspired them to come out to their fans about their gender presentation and sexuality. The couple always sends uplifting messages to the young idols seeking their advice, for they know of the fear these young people feel about the judgment that comes with being true to themselves. In some interviews after their concerts, the couple is asked about what they think about being the inspiration of younger LGBT idols. Yoongi feels he cannot answer such a question because he does not see himself as an inspiration. Yes, he and Jimin are glad that more idols are confident in expressing themselves wholeheartedly. Still, at the same time, Yoongi feels like he and Jimin were just victims of an unlikely situation. Bangtan has done many groundbreaking things that have changed how the K-pop industry works. Still, the couple never thought they would become symbols of the LGBT community in Korea and worldwide. Jimin feels pressured by such designation, for one wrong move would mean instant judgment, not only on them but also on the idols that have come out. Despite this, Yoongi and Jimin remain gracious in the spotlight that is given to them by the public, for all they want is to be true to themselves without hurting those around them.
-
When Namjoon wakes up and sees the sun setting outside his window, he knows he is screwed. The leader quickly puts on the cleanest pair of sweater and jogger pants he could find in his closet, tucking his phone into his pants pockets before rushing out of his bedroom and closing the door with a loud bang.
“Gee, what’s the rush, hyung?” Taehyung complains, the younger boy sitting in the living room watching a psychological thriller.
“I completely forgot that my first production meeting with TXT is today!” Namjoon shouts from the entrance of the dorms, quickly putting on a pair of sneakers before rushing down to the complex’s parking garage. He quickly hops onto his bike, puts on his helmet, and rushes toward the office building.
When Namjoon arrives in his studio, the members of TXT are patiently standing by the door, the five members bowing when they see him running towards them.
“Good evening, RM-sunbaenim.” Soobin, the group’s leader, greets him. “It’s nice meeting you today.”
“Good evening, guys. Sorry for the delay. I accidentally took too long of a nap today and completely forgot that we had a schedule for five. I’m so sorry if you guys had to wait so long.” Namjoon blabbers as he types in the passcode to his studio. “Come in, come in. Make yourselves comfortable on the couch while I get everything ready.”
The members of TXT sit awkwardly on the couch as Namjoon gets his work computer and equipment ready for their introductory consultation. Bang PD requested Namjoon to be TXT’s primary producer for their upcoming album. Despite his initial hesitance, Namjoon accepted the offer. Namjoon knocks himself on the back of the head for not being a more attentive sunbae to his younger labelmates. TXT debuted while Bangtan was touring in 2019, and all the issues the group faced in the past year did not allow them to be close to their younger labelmates.
“We first met each other in New Jersey, right?” Namjoon asks, and the five members nod.
“Yes, sunbaenim. We watched the show on the first night of your New Jersey concert and filmed some content backstage afterward.” Yeonjun, the eldest of the group, explains.
“I see. Sorry if we haven’t been the best sunbaes lately, with everything that happened.” Namjoon apologizes, the Bangtan leader cringing when he looks back at the difference in his group’s mental state the day they met the TXT boys, less than 24 hours before their lives changed forever.
“It’s okay, sunbaenim. We understand that the past year has been challenging for you, especially on Jimin-sunbaenim and Suga-sunbaenim.” Taehyun, the second youngest, says. “J-Hope-sunbaenim and I keep in contact, and we’re very thankful that he’s been trying to help us even if he had concerns to worry about.”
“And now we’re thankful again that you accepted our request to produce and co-write our next album, even if you could have spent your time working on your own music instead.” Hueningkai, the youngest, adds.
“Ah, it’s no worries, really,” Namjoon says sheepishly. “I’m taking this as my way of being a better sunbae to you.”
Despite Namjoon running late, the initial meeting is still productive; the producer encourages the TXT members to voice their opinions on the themes they want to explore in their new album. The genres they would like to explore are also discussed in the meeting. Namjoon takes little notes of what he thinks the members’ personalities are: Soobin, the leader, is timid and easily swayed by the decisions of his other members. Yeonjun, the eldest, is the most outspoken, impressing Namjoon when the younger boy tells him he wants to incorporate the raps he wrote for the new album. Beomgyu, the middle child of the group, has a lot of input in the album; Namjoon finds out that Beomgyu was the group’s first member to have songwriting & producing credits on their albums. Taehyun is the closest to the BTS members, keeping in contact with Hoseok and Jimin. Hueningkai, the youngest, also expresses his desire to utilize his wide range of vocals in the new songs they are to create.
Namjoon wanted to work with the group longer. Still, after a few hours, the TXT members were asked to go home by their manager, for they had an early morning variety show shoot. When the group leaves, Namjoon releases a long-held breath, and the leader is suddenly overwhelmed by the fact that he is now writing and producing music for his labelmates. A sense of responsibility suddenly fills Namjoon, not just in terms of working on the album but also in being a better example for TXT. The members are young, none past the age of twenty, and Namjoon can see his younger self in them. As Namjoon bikes back to the dorms, he can only wish that something special comes out of his time working with TXT.
The leader does not have a schedule the following day, so he wakes up late into the morning to the smell of lunch being prepared in the kitchen. Namjoon does not bother about looking presentable, rolling out of bed with his hair unbrushed and finding his way to the dining table as he stretches. He finds Hoseok and Taehyung in the kitchen, his two remaining housemates cooking.
“What’s for lunch?” Namjoon asks, peering at what the two are preparing in the kitchen.
“Galbitang. Hobi-hyung’s mom visited earlier and cooked this for us.” Taehyung shares. “She told us to heat it if we were about to eat lunch.”
“Oh, eommoni came by?” Namjoon asks, surprised. “Why didn’t you wake me up? I could’ve said hi.”
“Eh, she told us not to wake you up because you were snoring,” Hoseok says, which earns a smack from Namjoon. “Ow, what a way to thank the son of the woman who made us a lovely meal.”
“We’re all her sons.” Namjoon and Taehyung complain, to which Hoseok only laughs.
“Okay, that’s enough heating.” Hoseok chuckles. “Set the table, Joonie; let’s eat lunch.”
The three members tuck into the hearty meal, their first together in a few days. Since Yoongi and Jimin had left for their tour, the three inhabitants of the group dorm resorted to delivery food as their primary source of sustenance if they were at home. Hoseok has skills in the kitchen, but the dancer is always too tired to cook by the time he comes home from the dance studio.
Meanwhile, Taehyung and Namjoon are less blessed in the kitchen department. Namjoon once burnt a pan without burning the steak he attempted to make for Hoseok’s birthday. Hoseok only laughed at the still-cold piece of meat on the burnt pan, taking over the cooking from Namjoon and managing to salvage the steak the two shared with the rest of the members.
“I heard from Tyun that the meeting went well last night.” Hoseok comments during lunch. Namjoon was surprised that Taehyun was not lying when he said he and Hoseok kept in touch.
“Yep. It felt a bit awkward at first, though.” Namjoon shares. “It felt so formal compared to how we usually work together.”
“Maybe it’s because you’re the kids’ sunbae. Did you tell them to call you hyung instead of sunbae to make things less awkward?” Taehyung asks.
“Gosh, that didn’t cross my mind at all yesterday!” Namjoon replies, shaking his head in realization. “I probably should the next time we see each other.”
“It’ll take some time for them to get used to calling you hyung. Tyun only started calling me hyung a month ago, even if we’ve been texting often since their debut.” Hoseok shares.
“I was amazed when Taehyun said that you communicate,” Namjoon confesses. “Crazy how you never mentioned that to us, Hobi; we could’ve been better sunbaes to them,”
“Well, who could blame me for not mentioning it, considering all the shit we went through last year?” Hoseok shares and the atmosphere at the dining table is sober.
-
As Namjoon continues to work with TXT in the coming weeks on their album, Hoseok busies himself training new faces that may debut as part of an idol group. Bangtan’s choreographer, Son Seungdeuk, retired as the principal choreographer for BigHit Entertainment to start his own private dance company and focus on family life. Upon his retirement, he recommended Hoseok to take his place due to his wide variety of dance knowledge and experience handling groups like Bangtan. When Bang PD calls Hoseok to his office, the dancer is nervous, thinking he may not reach the standards Sungdeuk set for the company’s idols and trainees. It took Hoseok quite sometime before he accepted the position, only after a lengthy video call with Jimin, who was promoting in the States.
“I don’t think I can do it, Minnie. I’d feel super pressured because I’d determine who debuts.” Hoseok explains to Jimin, who only chuckles at his hyung.
“Hyung, why do you think about things like that?” Jimin laughs. “Think about what a great opportunity this is first.”
“Yeah, it is excellent.” Hoseok agrees. “It’ll keep me busy while I wait for my enlistment, but can I do it?”
“Of course, you can, hyung,” Jimin assures. “ Without you, Bangtan wouldn’t be as good at dancing as we are now.”
“Aish, that was Sungdeuk-hyung and all our other choreographers’ and dance teachers’ jobs, not mine.”
“But you were the one that got us to get off our asses and actually spend the time practicing the choreography.” Jimin insists. “ I think you’d be a great dance teacher, hyung.”
“Thanks, Minie. That makes me feel a bit better.”
When Hoseok accepts Bang PD’s offer, he is cast as one of the judges on the company’s new reality show that would pick the members of the company’s new boy group. It is an intricate production, a world-class training facility built in the mountains of Korea. Hoseok is surprised when he visits the set for the first time, seeing how far their company has come from the flooded basement practice rooms and studios he and his members spent their youth in.
The trainees Hoseok teaches are young, around the same age as him, or even younger when he first entered the company. He sees the same fire in their eyes, the desperation to become part of the final debut lineup. The only difference is that the trainees come from many places, not just Korea. Hoseok wonders how growing up in a different country would affect their training experience in Korea, the dancer slowing down when he speaks to the foreign trainees to ensure they understand him. Watching the trainees improve weekly brings a sense of pride to Hoseok, who is excited to see what they will be capable of once they debut. At the same time, he also feels sorry for these young teens, sacrificing their childhood the same way Hoseok did when he was younger. Instead of going to high school and hanging out with their friends after classes, they spend their afternoons and nights singing and dancing until they lose their voices and their bodies ache. But Hoseok also knows that sacrifice is a necessary evil to ensure they are ready to debut and show their best in the competitive world of the K-pop industry. Hoseok can only hope that the kids who do not get picked to be included in the final lineup continue to pursue their dreams in the industry or find paths in life where they will excel.
Traveling to and from the filming location tires Hoseok, with the dancer waking before sunrise and returning home to the dorms late at night. On some nights, when he comes home early, he brings meals for Taehyung and Namjoon. Hoseok doesn’t see Namjoon often anymore; the younger rapper is busy preparing for TXT’s upcoming album in his studio. Hoseok tries his best to spend time with Taehyung, whom he often finds watching mystery dramas on the couch; the younger singer tells him he’s studying his role in the series he is filming. On some nights, Hoseok wonders what Jungkook is up to, the youngest of the group disappearing from the dorms to travel the world as soon as their temporary hiatus started. Hoseok knows he should sit down and catch up with his members while they are not yet enlisted, but his busy life prevents him from doing so.
A rare moment presents itself when Hoseok finds himself at home before the sun sets. Before heading home, he asked his driver to pass by a grocery store to buy ingredients for Namjoon and Taehyung’s favorite kimchi fried rice & japchae. When he arrives home, Taehyung stands in the kitchen, flipping through script pages.
“Hey there.” Hoseok greets, setting down the groceries on the kitchen counter beside Taehyung.
“Hey, hyung. You’re home early.” Taehyung greets, his eyes not leaving the script he is reading.
“Filming ended early. Wanna help me make kimchi fried rice & japchae for dinner?”
“Sure.”
Taehyung puts down the script he is reading on the dining table. “What do you need me to do, hyung?”
“You could prepare the rice while I fry the beef for the japchae.”
Taehyung and Hoseok’s dynamics in the kitchen have improved slowly. Fewer meals are burned, and tastier dishes come out of the kitchen when they can cook together. Taehyung prepares the rice in the rice cooker and boils the noodles for the japchae. Hoseok, meanwhile, fries the pre-marinated beef and slices the vegetables. When the noodles are cooked, Taehyung drains them and tosses them into the pan with the fried meat; Hoseok seasons the noodles before throwing in the vegetables. The rice cooker pings; Taehyung takes out the freshly cooked rice, setting it on the counter to cool while he fries kimchi in the pan with chili paste. When Taehyung deems the rice cool enough, he scrapes the rice from the rice cooker into the pan, frying the rice. Hoseok’s leftover vegetables from the japchae are tossed into the kimchi fried rice, and a hearty amount of cheese is sprinkled on top of the rice.
“Is Joon here?” Hoseok asks while he plates the japchae.
“Yep. Hyung’s probably watching something in his room.” Taehyung replies as he, too, plates the kimchi fried rice. “He said his meetings were canceled today, and he didn’t feel like coming to the studio.”
“Tell him we’re eating dinner. I’ll fix the rest of this up.”
Taehyung finds Namjoon under the sheets in his bedroom, the leader sobbing into his pillow. Taehyung joins him in bed, slowly pulling the sheets to reveal the leader’s tear-stained face.
“Hard day today, hyung?” Taehyung asks, a gentle smile as he rubs the leader’s back.
“Hard everything. I feel so weird not seeing all of you all the time. I miss everyone.” Namjoon sobs and Taehyung pulls him up from the bed, giving him a big hug.
“It’s okay, hyung,” Taehyung assures the rapper. “It’ll pass, I promise.”
“Don’t you find it weird? We’ve lived together for years, and now everyone’s always apart.” Namjoon complains. “The only time we talk is in the group chat, and it’s inconsistent because of our time differences.”
“It’s weird for me too. Oddly, I don’t go to the company daily for practice or recording. Weirdly, I’m not traveling all over the place for concerts and tours.” Taehyung shares. “Strangely, I’m working with different people and crew. It’s weird, but I tell myself it will all be okay when we get back together as seven.”
“But that’s still a long time, Tae,” Namjoon whines.
“At least we have something to look forward to, right?”
Namjoon is quiet, taking into consideration Taehyung’s words. The younger singer is right; he still has something to look forward to. He can still look forward to Seokjin’s exit from the military in less than a year. He can look forward to Seokjin’s next vacation leave. He can look forward to the public reception of TXT’s album when it releases and to creating his music to put out before he enlists.
“You’re right, Tae.” Namjoon sighs, offering a small smile to Taehyung. “Thanks for the pep talk.”
“Anything for you, hyung.” Taehyung smiles back. “Now get up; Hobi-hyung and I made kimchi fried rice and japchae for dinner.”
“Hobi’s home early?” Namjoon asked, surprised.
“Yep, he said filming ended early today.”
The table is set when Taehyung and Namjoon head to the dining area; kimchi fried rice, japchae, and bottles of beer and soju are on the table.
“What’s the occasion?” Namjoon asks when he takes a seat at the table.
“Nothing. I just wanted to make us a meal since filming ended early.” Hoseok reasons. “It’s been quite some time since we got to eat together.”
“Yeah, the last time was when Hobi-hyung’s mom came over and brought us meals,” Taehyung adds.
Even if dinner is just between the three of them, the boys feel comforted that they still have each other to rely on. They may no longer spend the majority of their days beside each other, yet they can still feel the love that still stands between them.
-
“Chop, chop, pretty boy. The sun doesn’t wait for you.” The camp commander booms, heavy boots stepping on Seokjin’s back as he goes through a thousand pushups. This is how Seokjin’s mornings started in the month he spent in base camp, enlistment pushing him to the limits of his body and sanity. Seokjin knew before enlisting that he needed to work harder than most enlistees, for the pressures of being an idol were on his back. He’s heard horror stories from older idols about their time in the military, of the abuse commanders and higher-ranking military personnel subject idol enlistees. Seokjin works hard to avoid such from happening to him.
Yet the stepping on still happens. Seokjin still has to endure the slaps when he doesn’t go beyond the minimum number of pushups or when he doesn’t hit the bull’s eye of the target during shooting practice. But Seokjin brushes all the difficulties his body and humanity face in camp, knowing that if he pushes to the best of his abilities, he’ll eventually earn the respect of the men who see him as a weakling just because he works as an idol.
Sometimes, the camp felt dehumanizing. Meal times are timed, and Seokjin has to eat as quickly as possible or risk starving himself in the high-intensity training they were subjected to. Showers are communal in open areas, enlistees smirking and laughing at him when he strips in front of them for the first time. Even bedtimes are timed, lights out at midnight and lights on before the sun rises. But Seokjin keeps his head up, only the thought of seeing his members soon in his mind.
After his one-month boot camp training, Seokjin is assigned to work as an active-duty soldier, patrolling at one of the military camps in the country. He is given back his phone but is only allowed to use it during dinner time. In this short time he is given, he makes sure to contact not only his parents and siblings but also his members, whom he missed so much. In his one month of training, the thought of Namjoon never leaves Seokjin’s mind. Maybe it’s also why he gets hurt when he misses the targets because he is too preoccupied with seeing the leader again. Seokjin sometimes cannot sleep at night out of fear that the leader might hate him for leaving. Seokjin fears that Namjoon no longer feels the same way about him when Seokjin’s heart has grown fond of the younger man in their time apart.
Seokjin’s concerns are eventually relieved when he calls Namjoon when he is allowed to, complaining to the younger man about his situation in the camp. It was the only way Seokjin knew not to make the conversation between them awkward, for he did not know if the younger still loved him. The short call gives Seokjin hope that Namjoon still loves him, especially when he reads Yoongi’s text the following day, telling the elder that he found Namjoon crying about missing him in one of the office’s bathrooms. The calls and messages between Namjoon and Seokjin may be short, but Seokjin can feel Namjoon’s love in every word he says. Seokjin, too, tries his best, coming up with cringy catchphrases during his daily patrolling to send to Namjoon during dinnertime. Namjoon replies, sending rolling eyes emojis to Seokjin’s cringy messages. Still, Seokjin knows that Namjoon loves every one of them, cringe aside.
When Seokjin receives news three months into his enlistment that he is about to go on his first 48-hour vacation outside of the camp, the eldest jumps in excitement, looking forward to spending the short time he is given seeing his members who are in Korea, and finally being able to kiss Namjoon and tell him how much he loves him to his face. But his plans suddenly change as he is on the way to the dorm; his mother urgently calls him to come to the hospital because his father was hospitalized.
“I’m so sorry, Joon. Eomma called and told me that Appa was in the hospital. I’m on my way to see him.” Seokjin apologizes when he calls Namjoon.
“It’s okay, I understand. A last-minute meeting came up, too. Maybe we can have coffee near the hospital when you’re available?” Namjoon asks, trying to hide his disappointment at the change of plans.
“That would be nice, Joon. I’ll text you later, okay?”
“Okay. Send my well-wishes to your eomma and appa.”
“I will. Thank you so much, Joon. I love you.”
“I love you too, hyung.”
Namjoon didn’t receive a text from Seokjin that night or the morning after. He knows he shouldn’t complain because Seokjin should put his family before him, but the younger man cannot help but feel like the short amount of time he could’ve spent with the eldest was stolen from him. Namjoon is all alone in the dorms for Taehyung left to film on Jeju Island, and Hoseok flew to the States to work on a collaboration. The leader finds himself watching Bon Voyage Season 4 again, his crying the same as he hugs Seokjin’s RJ plushie. He debates whether or not he should call Seokjin and ask him about the coffee date. Still, he decides not to, not wanting to be a bother to their eldest, who was spending time watching over his father, who experienced a mild stroke. Namjoon knows that Seokjin has another 48-hour vacation lined up in a month or so, but a month cannot help but seem far away.
Before Namjoon goes to bed that night, he receives a call from Seokjin. Namjoon wants to be petty and not answer the eldest’s call, but his pining is too much to bear, and the leader tears up when he answers the call.
“You promised me a coffee date, but you never texted or called me back,” Namjoon complains.
“I’m so sorry, Joonie. Eomma was the only one watching over appa when I got to the hospital because my siblings were abroad.” Seokjin apologizes. “ I told eomma to go home and rest and that I’d spend my vacation watching over appa because she was exhausted. I’m sorry I couldn’t get the chance to go out and see you, my love.”
“I know. I’m not supposed to be jealous because you’re caring for your dad, but I don’t know why I’m so sad I couldn’t see you.”
“I’m sad too, Joonie, I am. I’m so sorry. I promise I’ll spend all my time with you the next time I get 48 hours out.”
“You don’t have to promise that.” Namjoon sighs. “Promising might only jinx it.”
“No, really, I’ll do everything I can to spend time with you,” Seokjin swears. “I can’t wait to see you again, Joonie.”
“Me too, hyung. I can’t wait to see you.”
Seokjin can say that his experience in camp has improved now that he is months into his enlistment. Seokjin has made friends with his bunkmates, performing silly songs and dance numbers for them on boring nights in camp. The eldest even heard rumors from his military friends that the higher-ups were considering awarding Seokjin for his hard work and dedication during his enlistment, reassigning him to the special forces. In training, Seokjin improved his marksmanship and became known as a golden boy, an all-around expert, the longer he stayed in the camp. Despite the new nickname, Seokjin keeps his head down, mindful that everything he says and does may be used against him when he is released from service.
Once, there was a time when all of Seokjin’s bunkmates had been released on vacation, with only Seokjin staying back, for he asked for an extension on his previous leave to take care of his father until he was sent home from the hospital. Seokjin decides to be adventurous, video-calling Namjoon when his friends leave, in the rarity of being alone in his barracks accommodation. Namjoon was in the studio, working on final edits for TXT’s albums, when he received Seokjin’s call.
“Did dinner get extended?” Namjoon asks, confused as to why Seokjin was calling him past midnight when he usually calls during dinnertime.
“It seems like it.” Seokjin jokes. “ My barrack buddies are out for their vacations, so I have the room all to myself.”
“I see.”
“You know what that means, right?”
Seokjin and Namjoon dabbled in phone sex in their time apart. Seokjin first suggested it, and Namjoon quickly agreed, not without reminding the eldest to be discreet with his late-night activities. The first time was awkward, Seokjin not knowing what to say to Namjoon to turn the younger man on. Through time, the two get better at their dirty talk, and phone sex becomes a quick activity that they can do after Seokjin’s rushed dinners. Now that Seokjin is alone in his bunkroom, he can take his time with Namjoon, ensuring that he and the younger man enjoy the closest thing to intimacy.
“Yes, hyung.” Namjoon breathes, suddenly turned on at the thought of having phone sex with Seokjin in his studio. The producer saves all his work before shutting down his computer, careful not to accidentally delete files in the throes of passion.
“Good. Are you still in the studio?”
“Yeah, I was working when you called.”
“Do you still keep lube in there?”
“Yeah. The dildo you gifted me is here too, hyung.”
“Naughty boy, do you fuck yourself on the dildo while working?” Seokjin teases. “Anyone who knows the password to your studio could see you, Joonie.”
Namjoon’s length hardens in his pants at his hyung’s words, the shame of being found in a compromising position in his studio turning him on.
“ Hyung, I’m hard.” Namjoon whines.
“Don’t touch yourself yet.” Seokjin orders. “Take your shirt off, Joonie.”
Namjoon quickly complies with Seokjin’s request, taking off his shirt and tossing it on the couch behind him.
“Now touch your chest. Play with your nipples for hyung.”
It’s embarrassing, moaning as he bucks his hips unconsciously at the pleasure that playing with his nipples brings Namjoon. But he is too lost in the sensation, looking at Seokjin on the video call with his camo pants and underwear pulled down to his knees, one hand slowly pumping his length.
“Feels good, hyung. Take your shirt off, too, please.”
Seokjin removes his shirt, leaving his dog tag on his neck. Namjoon said that it’s sexy seeing Seokjin topless, especially now that his biceps, triceps, and abs are more defined due to his military training.
“Now, take your pants and underwear off, but don’t touch yourself until I tell you to.”
Namjoon stripped off his jogger pants and underwear, sliding the swivel chair he sat on backward so Seokjin could see him fully.
“Good boy. Now, take the lube and open yourself up for hyung’s cock.”
Namjoon takes the bottle of lube from his table and sits on the ground, pushing the swivel chair to the side. Namjoon was already open, having played with himself in one of the cubicles in the company bathroom. The younger man does not like to admit it. Still, he has an exhibitionism kink - getting himself off in places in the company building where he would get in trouble or have awkward conversations if he were found turned him on.
“I’m already wet for you, hyung.” Namjoon moans, fingers ghosting against his wet rim. “Look, I already played with myself earlier.”
“Looks like somebody was pent up today.” Seokjin chuckles, panting as he grips his aching length. “Where did you play with yourself, Joonie?”
“The cubicle near the studio, the one with the broken lock,” Namjoon confesses, cheeks turning red. “I couldn’t help it. I felt stuck making the final edits; I needed to feel full.”
“Poor baby. Don’t worry; hyung’s here now. Hyung will make you feel better, okay?”
“Okay.”
“Now, finger yourself for hyung. Make it wet.” Seokjin orders. “You know I like it when your boy pussy’s soaping.”
Namjoon moans at Seokjin’s words, drizzling lube on his waiting hole as he lies on his back and sets his feet to the side, his cock, balls, and hole fully displayed for Seokjin. One finger turns to two and then three; Namjoon pushes and pulls as he stretches for Seokjin to see.
“Fuck, you look so good when you’re all stretched out for me, Joon.” Seokjin moans. “I can’t wait to fill you with my cock and fuck you til you scream.”
“I need you, hyung, please. Fuck me.”
“Get the dildo, and show me how you’ll ride me when you see me.”
Namjoon retrieves the dildo from his drawer, setting it down on the floor before getting on his knees. The leader faces the camera, fucked out, as he lines the dildo with his waiting hole. The initial penetration still burns despite the amount of lube Namjoon has drizzled in his entrance and on the toy. Still, the pain eventually mixes with pleasure, the leader pushing and pulling himself on the thick, long length.
“Fuck, Joon, will you ride me in your studio when I arrive?” Seokjin groans. “ You look so good taking my cock. I’ll pull you to the bathroom near your studio and fuck you on the sink for everyone who comes in to watch.”
Namjoon can only moan at Seokjin’s words, the thought of being caught pushing him toward the edge. Namjoon cannot wait to feel Seokjin’s warmth inside of him, and he cannot wait to see and be one with his lover again.
“I’m close, hyung.”
“Me too, Joonie. You look so good, fuck.” Seokjin moans, the elder man speeding up in pumping his length, coming when he watches Namjoon come undone without touching his cock; the leader’s aching length paints his chest and the floor white, Seokjin’s name on his mouth.
Seokjin wishes he could be with Namjoon now and help the leader clean after sex. But all Seokjin can do is offer loving words to Namjoon when the leader cries after he orgasms.
“ You did so well, baby,” Seokjin whispers. “Don’t cry; hyung will see you soon.”
“I miss you so fucking much, hyung.” Namjoon bawls. “I need you.”
“I know, baby. I promise that you’ll see me soon, okay?”
Due to his excellent performance in camp, Seokjin is granted a short vacation earlier than expected. Seokjin doesn’t tell Namjoon about his early vacation, wanting to surprise the leader. On his way to the dorms, Seokjin confirmed with Taehyung, Hoseok, and Jungkook, who had recently returned to Korea, if they would not be in the dorms for the night to avoid the three from overhearing the loud moans that Seokjin planned to rip out of Namjoon that night. The three are gracious enough, with Jungkook telling Seokjin that Hoseok and Taehyung could sleep in his apartment to give Seokjin and Namjoon their privacy in the 48 hours they have together. When Namjoon arrives home from the studio, he can only cry as he rushes toward Seokjin, who is preparing dinner in the kitchen.
“What the fuck, hyung? Why didn’t you tell me you were visiting?” Namjoon cries on Seokjin’s shoulder, the couple hugging for the first time in months.
“I wanted to surprise you. The higher-ups said I was doing well in camp and gave me 48 hours out.” Seokjin replies, wiping off the tears from Namjoon’s face with his hands. “I missed you, Joonie.”
“I missed you so much, hyung.”
Seokjin does make good on his promise to Namjoon. Dinner is quick, Namjoon’s hands all over Seokjin’s while the elder washes the dishes after their meal.
“Careful, Joonie. Don’t wanna break any plates.” Seokjin reminds, but Namjoon only whines, continuing his ministrations on the older man.
“I already broke a lot in the first month you were gone. Another broken plate won’t matter.” Namjoon replies, turning Seokjin around and kissing his lips fervently. Namjoon grinds his hardening length against Seokjin’s, and the older man moans.
Seokjin is forced to leave the rest of their utensils unwashed when Namjoon pulls down his pants, the leader kneeling on the ground as he takes Seokjin’s now-aching length out of the confines of his camo pants.
“I didn’t think fucking a military man would be so hot.” Namjoon pants, swirling his tongue around Seokjin’s wet tip.
“Fuck, Joon. You’re a menace.” Seokjin pants, Namjoon finally sheathing the eldest’s length into his mouth.
It doesn’t take Seokjin long to come in Namjoon’s mouth, the eldest’s cock twitching when Namjoon shows him the cum pooling in his mouth before swallowing it. Namjoon does not waste any time, stripping his clothes off before leaning his chest against the kitchen counter and spreading his legs apart for Seokjin to see the anal plug he is wearing.
“You didn’t know I was coming, but you have a plug inside you?” Seokjin asks, skeptical.
“I like working with a plug when stressed - it makes me feel grounded.”
It doesn’t take long for Seokjin to replace the anal plug in Namjoon’s hole with his now-hardening length. Namjoon can only cry out in pleasure, finally being one with the man he loves the most. The leader is quickly overwhelmed by Seokjin’s pounding into him, stray tears finding their way out of Namjoon’s eyes as Seokjin’s name leaves his lips like a prayer.
“Hyung, please. Please, I need you.” Namjoon begs, hands tightly holding onto the kitchen counter.
“I got you, Joon. I got you.” Seokjin whispers, taking Namjoon’s length into one of his hands.
It doesn’t take Namjoon long to cum; a few pumps of Seokjin’s hand, and the leader drips unto the kitchen floor. The tightening of Namjoon’s hole when he comes makes Seokjin see stars, filling the leader with his cum.
Cleanup does not take long, with Seokjin carrying a jelly-boned Namjoon to the leader’s ensuite bathroom, filling the tub with warm water. As the tub fills, Seokjin wipes off the traces of their activity in the kitchen and ensures that none of the dishes he prepared for Namjoon is burnt. Once he deems the kitchen in order, Seokjin returns to the bathroom, joining Namjoon in the tub.
“How’d you even get in the dorm?” Namjoon asks, his eyes closed at the warmth of the water surrounding them. “I don’t remember texting you the password.”
“I called Tae, of course.”
“He knew you were coming?”
“Just this morning,” Seokjin admits. “Hobi and Tae are having a sleepover at Jungkook’s place. I wanted to ensure we had the whole place to ourselves.”
“No wonder you didn’t protest when I pulled down your pants and sucked you off.” Namjoon comments. “I do have an exhibitionism kink, but not to the point of our members catching us fucking in the kitchen.”
“Not like Tae and Hobi haven’t heard you moan when we video call,” Seokjin replies.
“They told you?” Namjoon asks, eyes comically widening as he hides his reddening face in his hands.
“The walls in your new place aren’t that thick, Joonie.” Seokjin jokes and Namjoon splashes water in his direction.
“Our place.” Namjoon corrects. “My room is yours too until we find our home when we finish our enlistment.”
The silence that passes between the two of them is calming as they soak in the tub filled with lavender oil. Seokjin scrubs Namjoon and himself clean when the water goes cold, kissing the leader.
“Don’t get too handsy, hyung. I’m getting hard over here.” Namjoon complains, to which Seokjin laughs.
“Get hard all you want. I’m making up for all the time we missed while I’m here.”
Seokjin does make it up to Namjoon in the less than 48 hours they spend together. The two fuck in the living room, in Namjoon’s bedroom, in the leader’s studio, in the dance studio, and the cubicle near Namjoon’s studio, as promised. But between their exhibitionist escapades, Namjoon and Seokjin talk a lot. They talk about Namjoon’s struggle to cope with not seeing Seokjin every day, of the pain he felt when he read the eldest’s letter when he left for his enlistment. Seokjin talks about his struggles in the camp and about the friendships he’s made inside. Namjoon tells Seokjin that he fears the eldest no longer loves him because they spend so much time apart. However, Seokjin only kisses Namjoon’s worry away, promising the younger man that his love for him is unending. Seokjin debates about telling the company about their relationship and coming out to the public, but they decide not to.
“If we come out, I feel like we’re stealing Yoongi and Jimin’s thunder, not that there’s something to steal.” Namjoon explains to Seokjin as the two lie in Namjoon’s bed, Seokjin’s bag packed by the door, for he leaves for camp first thing in the morning.
“Yeah, I feel the same way, too. There’ll be a lot of press again, and I don’t want that.” Seokjin replies, kissing Namjoon on the forehead. “I want what we have to stay just between us,” Seokjin replies, kissing Namjoon on the forehead.
“Me too, hyung. Let’s leave it to the press to figure it out.” Namjoon smirks. “And the media won’t because I’ll probably be inside when you return.”
Seokjin doesn’t like the thought that it will take a few years before he and Namjoon can finally live together in peace, but he still looks forward to that day.
“You’re right. All that’s important now is that I have you, and you have me, and we’ll wait for each other.”
“Yeah. I love you, hyung.” Namjoon whispers, taking Seokjin into a chaste kiss.
“I love you, too, Joon.”
-
Between concert stops, Jimin and Yoongi advocate for LGBT youth rights and Carrier Syndrome visibility and awareness. A small organization in the United States that works with men diagnosed with Carrier Syndrome contacted the couple, asking them to be the new ambassadors of their cause. Jimin and Yoongi wholeheartedly agree to the partnership, not accepting the monetary compensation the organization offered in exchange for filming an advertisement campaign and featuring in the print and online material the organization releases. Due to Jimin and Yoongi’s involvement with the organization, they received large amounts of donations from both large companies that offered to sponsor them and from ARMY, who were proud of the couple for using their fame for good. Jimin and Yoongi also work with international LGBTQIA+ organizations, especially in countries where LGBT rights are not yet in place. This was done through the United Nations, which previously partnered with BTS on its anti-violence campaign for the youth.
Instead of spending their free time resting between concerts, Yoongi and Jimin find themselves in charity events and symposiums where they talk about their experience. In the beginning, Jimin always cried when he gave his speech about his experience with Carrier Syndrome and losing Bora. Still, through time, he learns to reign in on his emotions during these speaking engagements through the help of Yoongi and his therapist. Coming to these events is exhausting, but the couple does not mind, only glad to serve those who need it.
But through time, the more events the couple attends, the more Jimin tires of sharing his story repeatedly. Jimin experiences compassion fatigue, and the dancer always passes out in bed when they arrive at the hotel after their activities. Yoongi now tended to stay longer in these events, accepting last-minute requests to speak in college seminars and high school talks. In the beginning, Jimin was proud of Yoongi for doing his absolute best to ensure they reached a broad audience with their campaign. But through time, Jimin becomes annoyed by the time he and Yoongi spend apart.
Jimin starts questioning whether Yoongi still loves him, for the rapper is always busy with his events and music. On the days when they do not have scheduled engagements, Jimin tries to initiate sex, dressing in the sexiest pair of lingerie he can find. Still, Yoongi only tells him that he is tired or has to work on his music for the night. Before they know it, the couple no longer sleeps in the same bed, Yoongi reasoning that he doesn’t want to disturb Jimin when he meets with artists and producers in the dead of night due to the time difference brought about by touring.
Towards the end of Jimin and Yoongi’s three-month world tour, Jimin’s pent-up emotions reach their limit when Yoongi bails out on their scheduled date in Tokyo, a city important to them. A last-minute charity ball for LGBT kids was held in the town. Yoongi was asked to speak at the event to help raise funds for children disowned by their parents due to their gender presentation and sexuality. Jimin knows that the responsibility handed to them as world-famous, openly gay idols cannot be taken lightly and that many LGBT people worldwide need representation and protection. The younger dancer also knows that Yoongi is more passionate about the cause than he is. Despite this, he cannot help but feel jealous of the advocacy, for it has eaten up Yoongi’s time, the couple unable to have sex or sleep in the same bed in months due to Yoongi’s busy schedule.
“I feel like the world knows everything about us, Yoongi. For once, can we shut the world out and think about us?” Jimin complains when Yoongi arrives late at night in their hotel room in Tokyo. The younger dancer is still fully dressed, for Yoongi bailed on him at the last minute.
“Jimin, you know we must use our position and power for good,” Yoongi explains as he removes the suit he wore to the event. “I’m sorry I don’t have the time to be with you, but rest assured that I’m doing this for everyone’s good.”
“That’s the problem!” Jimin screams. “You care about everybody else, but you can’t even take just thirty minutes of your night to care about me.”
Yoongi pauses from taking off his suit to turn around to Jimin, who sits on the bed.
“Why are you making a big deal of something that isn’t an issue?” Yoongi asks, frustrated by Jimin’s outburst.
“It’s an issue to me, Yoongi! I’m sick and tired of repeating my experience of losing Bora in every charity event we attend.” Jimin shouts, tears slowly falling from his face. “I’m sick and tired of lying alone in bed at night because you’re at another fundraiser or busy working on your music!”
“Well, you could’ve said something before it got out of hand! I thought you understood why we’re doing this, Jimin.” Yoongi shouts back in disbelief. “It’s our responsibility as world-class idols to give a voice to the oppressed. Once the tour’s over, I promise you’ll get me all to yourself.”
“I’m tired of being a pioneer, hyung. I knew that when we publicized our relationship and our challenges, it wouldn’t be easy that every day we’d wake up to people hating us just because we’re being true to ourselves, but I’m tired, hyung.” Jimin cries. “I’m tired of pretending we’re in a happy relationship when we don’t even sleep in the same bed most nights.”
Yoongi’s stoic front finally breaks, the older man climbing into bed with Jimin, taking him into a hug. Jimin resists Yoongi’s hug, pushing him away as he cries, but Yoongi holds on, leaving gentle kisses on Jimin’s forehead.
“I love you, Jimin. I’m sorry that you feel this way, but I understand you. I also tire of telling the world about our lives, but it’s a necessary evil. But I promise, I promise that you’ll have my full attention when we return home, okay?” Yoongi reasons and Jimin finally hugs him back.
“I was disappointed, hyung. Tokyo’s an important city to us because this was where we confessed our feelings for each other.” Jimin explains. “I felt set aside when you took the last-minute offer instead of going out for dinner with me.”
“I’m so sorry that I hurt your feelings, love.” Yoongi finally apologizes. “What can I do to make it up to you?”
Jimin wraps his arms around Yoongi’s neck, leaning forward and kissing the elder’s lips passionately, slowly pushing him down to the bed.
“Can we be selfish for once, hyung?” Jimin asks. “Can we put our relationship - us, first, for once?”
“Anything for you, my love.”
Sex between the couple that night is slow and intimate, far different from the quick and passion-filled nights they’ve spent together through the years. Yoongi strips Jimin of the blouse and pants he was supposed to wear to dinner, laying the dancer on his back on the bed. Yoongi forms a path of kisses on Jimin’s body, from his neck and chest down to his stomach, thighs, and aching length. Jimin can only mewl when the warmth of Yoongi’s mouth engulfs his hard length, the older man licking and suckling along the dancer’s cock. Yoongi holds Jimin’s hand through it, the dancer’s back arching when he comes in the rapper’s mouth.
When Yoongi stands to retrieve a condom from his bag, Jimin pulls him back. Yoongi doesn’t argue, for he understands what Jimin needs, but his heart jumps, for this is the first time they have unprotected sex after losing Bora. Penetrative sex was rare after the incident, the first time being in Busan after Jimin was released from the mental health facility. It was a tear-filled experience, Yoongi going as slow as possible for Jimin’s comfort. However, the dancer still bawls, not only at the physical pain but at remembering that it would be impossible for him to bear children again. Despite this impossibility, Yoongi made sure to wear a condom every time they had sex after the experience in Busan, for Jimin explained to him in tears that the feeling of Yoongi’s release filling him up made him think about the impossibility of having biological children. During the tour, Yoongi keeps up with the practice in the few times they have sex.
Yoongi does not let go of Jimin’s hand when he sheaths his bare length into Jimin, who gasps and tightens his hold of Yoongi’s hands. He makes sure to go slow, careful not to hurt or overwhelm Jimin, even if it takes everything in him not to sink into the dancer’s inviting heat. When Yoongi is fully sheathed into Jimin, the rapper leans forward, taking his lover into another kiss.
“I love you, Jimin. I’m sorry,” Yoongi whispers as he slowly pulls out of Jimin, only to push in again.
Jimin wraps his arms around Yoongi’s neck, leaning on the rapper’s shoulders in between kisses as he moans the older man’s name.
“Please, hyung, please,” Jimin begs, and Yoongi takes Jimin’s length into his free hand, pumping it along his slow thrusts.
The gentleness drives Jimin crazy, Yoongi’s touch burning against his skin. Jimin cannot control how his mind and body react to Yoongi’s ministrations, the slow drag of his orgasm building in him.
Their names meld with their moans, Yoongi slowly building up a faster pace when he deems that Jimin can handle it. The quicker pace quickly sends Jimin past the edge, only Yoongi’s name on his lips as tears continue to flow from his eyes. Yoongi kisses the tears away from Jimin’s face as his orgasm suddenly overtakes him, filling Jimin with his release. The sensation of being filled with Yoongi’s come overwhelms Jimin, body shaking with sobs. Yoongi can only hug Jimin, rubbing his back as he allows his lover to cry out the pain that fills his body.
“I’m here, Jimin. I’m never leaving. I’m sorry, I’m sorry.” Yoongi whispers into Jimin’s ear in an attempt to relax the younger.
Yoongi has gone soft inside Jimin, so he finally pulls out, his come leaking out of Jimin when he does. Jimin cries more at the feeling of Yoongi’s release leaving his body, the older man arranging his and Jimin’s bodies on the bed, with Jimin tucked safely in Yoongi’s arms.
“Let it all out, love. I’ll be here.” Yoongi whispers and continues rubbing Jimin’s back to soothe him.
“Sing me a song, hyung. Please, make the pain go away.” Jimin begs, and his lover’s request catches Yoongi aback, but he still complies, only wishing to relieve Jimin’s ache.
Will you stay by my side? Will you promise me? If I touch you, that you might fly away, that you may be shattered. I’m scared. I would stop the time. Once this moment passes, it might become something that didn’t happen, and I might lose you. I’m scared. Like a butterfly, just like a butterfly.
The intimate night in Tokyo helps heal the rough patches in their relationship caused by Jimin’s inability to verbalize his concerns to Yoongi and Yoongi’s busy schedule. The members see the difference between the two when they return home to Korea, the seven members of Bangtan going out for dinner the night before the couple’s homecoming show.
“Jin-hyung, it’s been ages since we’ve last seen each other,” Yoongi comments when he and Jimin arrive at the restaurant where the group gathers. The couple ran late due to Jimin asking for a quickie before leaving.
“More than half a year, actually, crazy,” Seokjin replies, standing from his seat and giving Yoongi and Jimin their well-deserved hugs.
“The military must have put you through insane training because this is the most buff I’ve ever seen you, hyung.” Jimin chuckles, the three taking their seats in the restaurant.
A long-needed sharing of their respective activities commences during the dinner. Yoongi and Jimin are congratulated for finishing the international stops of their tour, and the couple shares some of the problems they encountered on the road. The couple feels that the group wants to know more about the nitty-gritty of the tour. Still, they keep their members hanging, telling them to watch the tour documentary where Yoongi & Jimin bear all, including the interviews where they share the personal details of their lives from the past year.
The rest of the group also shares what they have been up to since the last time they gathered as seven members. Seokjin shares funny moments that have taken place in the camp and the hilarities that he and his bunkmates get up to during their free time after dinner. Namjoon plays them snippets of the songs he worked on with TXT on their latest album, the leader receiving heavy praise from his members for venturing outside the group. Hoseok also shares his experience being a reality show judge and how nerve-wracking it was to have a hand in picking who stays and who leaves the competition. Taehyung shows the group behind-the-scenes clips of the mystery drama he is a part of, the first few episodes a hit upon release. Jungkook, too, shares pictures from his travels around the world, along with short audio files of songs that may be included in his album.
Jimin does get Yoongi all to himself after their 2-day sold-out homecoming concert in Seoul. Domestic life is blissful as the two explore each other’s bodies on their new home’s surfaces. Life is quiet for Yoongi and Jimin in their two months together before Yoongi leaves to enlist. Jimin makes sure to cherish his time with Yoongi, the dancer now more vocal about his feelings towards the rapper, for he knows that it will be quite some time until they can enjoy the simple, slow life again.
In the mornings, Jimin and Yoongi wake up with the sunrise, Yoongi begrudgingly joining his lover when he goes out for early morning runs around their community. Yoongi cannot deny that the runs have helped him clear his head, the soft breeze of the early morning wind filling his lungs. When they return home, Yoongi prepares coffee and breakfast for both of them while Jimin takes a shower. The two eat silently, occasionally discussing whatever random sight they may have seen during their run. Jimin washes the dishes after their meal, and Yoongi takes his turn in the shower. In the mornings, Jimin usually heads out to the company to attend meetings on his plans - an album, music videos, guesting on music shows, and a small party to accompany his first album release. Yoongi tinkers around the house in the mornings, doing little projects to make their shared home cozier. Yoongi doesn’t come to the office until lunchtime, bringing Jimin the lunch they share in Yoongi’s studio.
In the afternoons, Jimin and Yoongi go their separate ways to do their schedules, may it be English lessons, vocal training, choreography class, and everything in between. The couple meets for dinner, Jimin ordering whatever he and Yoongi may be craving for the night. They eat their meals in Yoongi’s studio again, Jimin providing comments and feedback on whatever project Yoongi is working on. The two try their best to be home before the evening rush, the couple going on impromptu karaoke sessions in the car when they get stuck in traffic. The couple’s sex life is healthier now, with Yoongi and Jimin listing things they want to try out in the bedroom. The jealousy that once filled Jimin no longer weighs him, the dancer’s heart soaring, knowing that Yoongi kept his promise.
On the weekends or days when they do not have schedules, the couple goes on road trips to nearby towns. If there is one thing that Yoongi and Jimin will never agree on, it is ideal travel destinations. Due to his childhood in Busan, Jimin loves the beach and water-related activities. Meanwhile, Yoongi prefers the tranquillity and silence of the mountains. The couple solves their disagreement with the trusty problem-solving method that Bangtan utilized since their trainee days - rock, paper, scissors. Yoongi often wins, for Jimin is oblivious that he tends to use scissors as his first move. But Yoongi still lets Jimin sometimes win, especially when he sees that Jimin is very excited about the new destination he has seen on social media. On their trips, they encounter fans asking them for pictures, and the couple is gracious enough to pose for them. Sometimes, Jimin can find the photos posted by the media, which disappoints him. But Yoongi reminds him that they are public figures after all, and the sharing of their pictures for public consumption cannot be helped.
All five members send Yoongi off to a training camp in Incheon for enlistment. Yoongi said goodbye to his members properly this time, unlike Seokjin’s untimely departure. The day prior, Jimin and Taehyung were present as Yoongi had his hair shaved in preparation for his intake into camp. It was a weird experience, for Yoongi got used to his shoulder-length hair while on tour.
“I’ll miss playing with your long hair before bed.” Jimin comments when he takes a picture of Yoongi’s shaved head to post online.
“I look like an egg. ARMY will laugh when they see my picture.” Yoongi groans, to which Jimin only laughs.
“Too late, hyung. I already posted it.” Jimin laughs, showing Yoongi the picture he took of him.
The six boys huddle around an empty parking lot a few meters away from the training camp to film Yoongi’s entry vlog. Press and family members of other enlistees were filling the camp’s parking lot, so the members decided to park further away to film without bothering others.
“Starting today, the remaining members of Bangtan will officially rely on takeout food because none of us have enough kitchen skills, time, or patience to cook almost every day like you and Jin-hyung do.” Taehyung comments, to which the members laugh.
“I’ll miss you nagging me to finish my work, hyung,” Namjoon says as he curiously rubs Yoongi’s shaved head. “Hey, it’s like petting a bald cat.”
Yoongi glares at Namjoon, the leader quickly pulling away his hand from Yoongi’s head. “I’ll miss nagging you too, Joon-ah.”
“They’ll let a cat enlist, huh? I guess there’s a first time for everything.” Hoseok jokes, to which Yoongi only rolls his eyes.
“You’ll never let the cat jokes go, huh?”
“Never, hyung. We’ll be fifty and keep thinking you’re a cat.” Jungkook replies, the youngest speaking for the first time since they arrived in the parking lot. The members know that Yoongi leaving is a lot to process for Jungkook, mainly since he heavily relied on both Seokjin and Yoongi in the past.
“I can imagine you doing that, Kook. I’ll miss you.” Yoongi replies, and Jungkook can only muster a small smile.
“Don’t get hurt in there, okay? And call me when you get the chance.” Jimin reminds Yoongi.
“I will, Jimin. Don’t worry about me. Don’t mope around the house like Joon did when Jin-hyung left, okay?” Yoongi jokes. “I’ll make sure the boys check up on you often.”
“Geez, no need for checking up. I’ve been preparing for this in the past months. I’ll be fine, hyung.” Jimin replies, rolling his eyes at his lover’s concern.
“I love you, Jiminie,” Yoongi whispers, barely heard by the other members as he pulls Jimin closer.
“I love you too, Yoongi-hyung.” Jimin replies, leaving a gentle peck on Yoongi’s lips.
The group gathers for one big group hug before Yoongi gives his members individual hugs; Jimin is reserved for last, and the dancer hugs Yoongi the longest, the couple fervently kissing before Jimin lets Yoongi go.
Jimin doesn’t mope around the house when Yoongi enlists. The dancer still does the same routines he had done with Yoongi in the two months they got the chance to live in domesticity. Jimin still runs in the early morning, heads to the company for shoots and meetings, and tries to beat the evening rush when he goes home.
But Jimin sometimes cries in the mornings when the space beside him in bed is cold and in the evenings when Jimin rolls over and doesn’t see Yoongi beside him. Jimin doesn’t cook breakfast, skipping it instead and drinking coffee on the way to the company building. The dancer eats lunch in the company’s cafeteria; the food is tasty but doesn’t compare to the lunchboxes Yoongi made for him. Jimin no longer sings karaoke in the car when he heads home, preferring to drive silently instead.
Jimin talks about this with his therapist, who tells him it is a normal reaction to changes after living with a partner for a long time. Jimin’s therapist encourages him to go out and meet with friends to try and tamp down the slight sorrow he feels without Yoongi in his life.
Modeling gigs present themselves to Jimin a few weeks after Yoongi enlists. Still, the dancer debates whether or not he should accept the offers. Jimin had been waking up nauseous in the mornings, the dancer blaming it on skipping breakfast and the strong coffee he drinks first thing into the day. Jimin’s doctor gives him medicine for the burning in his chest. Still, after a week of medication, the discomfort does not disappear. Jimin feels a small, incessant voice at the back of his head that tells him to visit his gynecologist to report his odd symptoms. The situation Jimin finds himself in is oddly familiar, sending an eerie shiver down his spine.
Jimin’s inner voice makes the right decision, for he receives news that will forever change his life. Park Jimin is seven weeks pregnant.