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He was odd from the second they met. The mask was weird, for starters, but so was his greeting, or lack thereof. See, when over half the population went their whole lives without ever finding their soulmate, people liked to try to increase the odds of finding theirs. It was pretty customary to touch every person you met, skin on skin, to find out if they were your soulmate. Most people’s soul marks, indicating where you would touch your soulmate for the first time, were on their hands or fingers. Soap’s was on the very tip of his middle finger, a common place for it. That was where he would touch his soulmate for the first time, if he ever met them.
The guys at the base lined up to meet him when he first arrived. They each introduced themself, then touched fingertips with him. Soap had stopped getting excited to touch new people long ago, this was a pretty routine part of life now, but his heart still beat a bit faster as he went down the line. The idea that the very next touch could send a spark through his whole body, changing the color of his soul mark from black to red, and resetting the course of his life forever was exciting. But no such spark happened, and he was used to that.
“Simon Riley.” The last man said, the one with the mask. “Call me Ghost.”
Soap paused, taking in his gloved hands that he was making no effort to lift. Clearly this guy didn’t do the whole soul mates thing.
“Nice to meet you.” Soap said with a smile. It wasn’t uncommon for people not to do the finger touch upon meeting new folks. Some wanted to find their mate more organically, some didn’t want to find out if a stranger was their soul mate without getting to know them first, some didn’t have a soul mark on their finger tips and therefore it was pointless for them to tap finger with people, since that wasn’t where their soulmate would touch them for the first time. And of course, there were those who didn’t believe in soul mates, thought the system was stupid, didn’t want to find theirs. Soap really wasn’t getting any of those vibes from Ghost, though, and he made a mental note to ask about it later.
Soap waited a long while to ask, as the more he got to know Ghost, the more he realized there was to know. He was very private, closed off, always wore the mask. Hell, most of the people at the base had never seen his face, even those who had served with him for years. So Soap wasn’t convinced he’d take kindly to a personal question so soon, he in fact forgot about it for a long while. It popped into his head again the first time Ghost called him Johnny, a signal to him that they’d moved a bit past strangers.
“Why don’t you do the finger taps when you meet people?” Soap asked. They were relaxing in the common room, a neutral space, and it was just him, Ghost, and Alejandro, a fairly private setting. He’d chosen it carefully to maximize his chances of getting an answer, but Ghost only rolled his eyes.
“He doesn’t do touching.” The answer came from Alejandro. “Skin on skin isn’t his forté, especially with strangers.”
“Oh.” Soap said. He was tempted to ask why, but sensed that was a very long, very personal explanation. “Has he checked with any of you?”
“A few.” Alejandro confirmed. “Not without a lot of peer pressure and a little bit of alcohol, so if you’re looking to find out, that’s your best shot.”
Soap nodded thoughtfully, but said nothing.
“His mark isn’t on his fingers though, not sure where it is.”
It took Soap a while to touch Ghost even without skin on skin, just over clothing. He was a very physical person most of the time, but Ghost gave off an intense aura of “don’t touch me”, and Soap respected his boundaries. He let Ghost be the first to reach out, literally. That first contact came in a very different form then Soap had expected, and after they’d known each other for longer than he’d thought it would take. He’d expected to get clapped on the back, something casual like that, but touching Ghost came as a full body hug. To be fair, Soap had been captured and was presumed dead for several days at that point. He’d bumped into Ghost, who was on watch, after escaping and killing the men holding him hostage, then limping all the way back to base.
“Johnny?” He asked, blinking.
“Aye, there’s a sight for sore eyes.” He couldn’t help but grin. Soap jolted in surprise when Ghost hugged him, but quickly melted into the touch. Soap loved touch, it was his love language and something that he ached for if he didn’t get enough.
“Thought you were dead.” Ghost said softly.
“You can’t get rid of me that easily.”
“Were you followed?”
“No one left alive to follow me.” Soap told him.
“Good. Are you hurt?” He finally pulled back to check Soap for injuries. He was hurt, he spent several days in the med bay after that, but he lived. He suspected Ghost was proud of his daring escape, if not a bit annoyed that he didn’t get to kill any of the bastards that took Soap himself. But things were different after that, little touches came much easier. Soap didn’t shy away from shoving him playfully, brushing up against him as he passed by, reaching out to fix his gear, sitting shoulder to shoulder on the couch, and patting him on the back after a long mission came to a close. Ghost didn’t seem to mind it, but he didn’t initiate much of the contact himself. Soap didn’t mind, though, he was happy to be friends with Ghost in whatever capacity he was ready for.
“Come on, we’ve served together how long and you’ve never wondered if we’re soulmates?” Gaz asked. Soap had walked in on the conversation, plopping down on the couch next to Alejandro after a long day.
“No.” Ghost said simply.
“It’d be just a little tap, and then you’d know forever. Come on, live a little.”
“You’re that sure we’re soulmates?” Ghost teased.
“No, I just think it’s weird not to want to know after so long.” Gaz protested.
“Come find out then.” Ghost pulled his sleeve back, exposing his bare wrist. Gaz leapt up, delighted, and ran his fingers over the skin. Nothing, obviously, Ghost’s mark wasn’t even on his wrist, from what Soap could see.
“See? Now we know.” Gaz seemed pretty pleased despite the touch not revealing any soul mates.
“Anyone else been dying to find out?” Ghost asked. Alejandro got up, which amused Soap since he already knew his mate was Rodolfo, but he tapped Ghost’s wrist anyway. Most of the men in the room got up and touched him, just for the hell of it, just to say they touched Ghost, just to know.
“Soap, come on.” Gaz said. “Don’t you want to know?”
He did want to know, desperately, so he stood and came over. The second his eyes met Ghost’s he knew he wasn’t going to touch him. Not here, in front of everyone. It was a weird line of thought, especially for him, someone so eager to find his soul mate, but he stood so their view was partly blocked by his body, and he ran his fingers over Ghost’s glove. When their eyes met again, he saw nothing in Ghost’s gaze but relief.
“Guess it’s not me.” Soap shrugged.
“Guess not.”
And everything was different after that. Soap wasn’t sure why, exactly, maybe because he’d respected that silent boundary, maybe because they still didn’t know, maybe because he’d felt something he’d never felt before the first time they locked eyes, but everything was different. It was the best possible different, the ‘suddenly closer’ kind of different, the sort that had Alejandro telling him Ghost hadn’t let anyone get this close in years, maybe not ever. Soap was happy.
Ghost was glad it was Johnny bandaging the wound, his shirt was off for this and he was showing more skin than he’d shown any of them before. Anyone else’s eyes would’ve drifted over his chest, over the scars and ink buried there, but not Soap. Not Johnny. His focus was on the wound in his arm, on bandaging it. The stim he’d been given had long since worn off and Ghost was fighting to keep his eyes open.
“You can rest, I’ve got you.” Soap told him gently. And he did. And he woke up in a bed, having been dressed by Soap and carried to a room in the safe house. And he all but ran to the nearest bathroom, angling two mirrors to look at the mark on the back of his neck. The black mark on the back of his neck. He’d sort of hoped it would be Soap, he could’ve tolerated it, maybe learned to like it. Part of him was disappointed, but another part was relieved. Soap deserved better than him, needed a lot more than he could ever give, and soulmates made everything complicated. This was for the best.
Soap had not taken Ghost as a cuddler, but he supposed it sort of made sense. The man was probably very touch starved, at this point. It had taken a lot of convincing to get him to share the massive safe house bed, and he wondered if this was why. He certainly wasn’t going to complain about waking up with Ghost all but laying on top of him, though. The way Ghost froze when he woke up showed that he didn’t quite share the sentiment.
“Morning.” Johnny said.
“Fuck, I’m sorry.” Ghost tried to pull back but Soap’s grip on him tightened.
“I-. I don’t mind.” He found himself blushing. “Don’t get a lot of touch out here.”
Ghost slowly relaxed back against his chest, though Soap could feel his heart pounding.
“It’s alright, breathe Ghost.” He soothed.
“Sorry, this is new for me.” It sounded like a confession.
“It’s okay, plenty of time to learn it.”
He huffed a laugh at that. “To learn physical contact?”
“Yeah, I dunno.” Soap laughed. “To learn to trust people I guess.”
Ghost nodded, then spoke. “It’s kind of nice.”
God what was Soap getting himself into.
“Yeah, it is. We could do this more, you know. At base, if you ever wanted to.”
“I would like that.” If Ghost’s heart had been fast before, it was racing like mad now.
“Jesus, your hearts gonna beat out of your chest.”
He felt Ghost take a few deep breaths, heart finally slowing.
“I’d like that.” He said again, calmer now.
“Me too. When’s extraction?”
“We’ve got a few hours.”
“Good.” Soap pulled him impossibly closer.
Ghost did take him up on that offer, back at base, it just took a while. Having a man wearing a skull mask silently creep into your room in the middle of the night was downright terrifying, but Soap was still glad he came by.
“Jesus Christ, Ghost, you can’t do that to me.” He hissed, trying to keep his voice down. “You okay?”
“Nightmare.” Ghost said, crawling into bed with him, pulling him close. The offer from the safe house popped back into his head.
“I’ve got you.” He soothed. Cuddling with Ghost was nice, he was very warm, the weight of him was almost soothing, easily lulling Soap back to sleep. There were no more nightmares that night.
“Nightmare.” It was a well worn explanation. Soap hoped he was lying about nightmares, at least some of the time, as an excuse to cuddle. It broke his heart how often he got them.
“I’ve got you.” He said, like always. Then, after a pause, after Ghost had relaxed. “Can I touch you?”
“You are touching me.”
“I want to play with your hair.” He clarified.
“Oh.”
“I won’t look, I promise.”
“I trust you.” Ghost said. Soap knew he did, but it certainly warmed his heart to hear him say it. The mask came off, and Soap reached up to tangle his hand in soft locks. The very tip of his middle finger met the back of Ghost’s neck and he felt a spark. He almost mistook it for pain, almost yanked his hand back, but it wasn’t painful, just intense. Ghost was tense now, frozen up like the first time they’d done this. Soap pushed through, needing this to be a good experience for him, and combed gently through his hair.
“Soap.” Ghost said, almost begged. “Johnny.”
“Are you okay?” He pulled his hand back even though it killed him to.
“Did you feel that too?” He asked it like he didn’t want to know the answer.
“Yeah, I did.” They lay in silence for a moment before Ghost tugged his mask back on and reached for the light.
“Ghost, once you look, you can’t un-look.” Soap blurted. “I don’t want to scare you away, we never have to look. We can just not know.”
“I-. It can’t be me. I can’t be your-.” He couldn’t even say it. Soap could tell he was crying.
“Why not? Why not, Simon?” His voice caught.
“No, not like that. You’re just-. You deserve so much more than me. I don’t know if I can even love like that, like you can. I might never be ready for love, sex, a house.” He was rambling, panicking.
“Ghost, we don’t have to worry about any of that. Whatever you are ready for is enough for me. I just want you.”
“You’re lying.” He accused.
“I’m not. I-.”
“Don’t say it. Please. Not yet.” Ghost begged. “It has to mean something.”
“It does. We go as slow as you need, okay?” Soap asked.
“Okay.”
“Let me cover my mark.”
“I want to look.” Ghost said after a moment.
“Are you sure?”
“Yeah, I’m sure. Slow, right?” He asked desperately.
“Slow.” Soap told him.
“Promise?”
“I promise.”
The light flicked on. It took a moment for his eyes to adjust, but the red mark wasn’t hard to see, standing out against pale skin.
“You didn’t-. I thought you touched me already, at the safe house. How the fuck did you bandage my arm, get my shirt back on, and put me to bed without touching me?” Ghost asked. His mask was wet with tears.
“You couldn’t consent to being touched, you were unconscious. I-. I didn’t want to find out like that.” Soap admitted.
“Did you know when you touched my glove instead of my wrist?” He asked.
“No, I just didn’t think you really wanted to be touched.”
“I’m sure glad you didn’t. Fuck, could you imagine? In front of all them? I think I knew then.” Ghost admitted.
“What are we going to tell them? They’ll see my mark.” Soap asked.
“Kiss me.”
“Okay.”
Ghost tugged his mask up and the moment their lips met was nothing short of magical. Soap could’ve kissed him for hours, days even.
“I love you.” He breathed, as they separated. Ghost nodded, and that was okay. He could say it when he was ready.
The others noticed almost instantly, which didn’t surprise Soap.
“What’s got you so happy this morning?” Gaz asked. Soap only grinned, shaking his head.
“What? Come on, something happen?”
All eyes were on him now, all he could do was hold his hand out. Gaz took it, looking it over.
“No fucking way. No fucking way!” Gaz exclaimed. “You found your soulmate?”
“Yeah.” Soap laughed. “Yeah, I did.”
“Well who is it?” Alejandro asked, coming over to look at his red mark.
“We all kind of thought it would be Ghost, up until you touched his wrist.” Price admitted.
“I didn’t touch his wrist, I touched his glove.” Soap said.
“I fucking knew it! I told you they didn’t touch!” Gaz exclaimed.
“It’s not-.”
“It is.”
“How’d he take it?” Alejandro asked.
“Well he freaked out but I think he’s come around to the idea.” Soap smiled.
“I’m assuming they know.” A gruff voice came from behind him. Ghost, his soulmate.
“I want details, what happened, how’d you find out?”
Soap only shook his head. “Another day.”
They had questions, a lot of questions, but all that mattered was Ghost. All that had ever mattered was Ghost; him, Simon, and the red mark on his finger. A promise, a pledge, a sign of good things to come. Johnny couldn’t wait.