Chapter Text
Zee lies under the parasol, trying to sleep on the beach, as he can hear the voice of his friend swimming in the ocean with people he had just met. He is so exhausted, but the sweltering heat makes it difficult to fall asleep.
“Hey, Zee! Come hang out with us!“ Okay…the heat and Max are making it downright impossible to sleep.
Zee tries to ignore him. He knows that Max won’t take it personally and won’t be offended by his complete lack of interest.
Max knew from the start that Zee didn't plan on swimming. Why? Because he just doesn't feel like it. He had told him from the start that he would do nothing but lie at the beach all day, better yet, their whole vacation.
If Zee didn't know any better, he would think that Max thought that he can’t swim.
But that's not right. He can swim, he’s just entirely awful at it. In fact, he’s so terrible that it wouldn’t make a difference if he’d just say that he never learned to swim at all. But for his peace of mind, peace he would have lost long ago if Max ever found out, Zee chooses to not explain his indifference on the topic of swimming.
“You know, it is really rude to just ignore someone when they’re talking to you,“ Max speaks up yet again. Soon enough, Zee can feel his shadow falling over him.
“That’s true, but I knew you wouldn’t actually get upset, so it’s fine,“ He replies.
“Sure, but you didn’t expect me to come here and not even speak to you right?. You thought I would just accept it and continue hanging out with the others. But here I am, talking to you and asking you once again to come take a dip in the sea with me… You don’t even have to venture into the deeper parts if that’s what you’re scared of. Just come swim with me please. It would be a real shame if we go home without you venturing out into the sea at least once, don’t you agree?“
“I don’t think that it’s even remotely a pity. I chose to not swim after all. It’s not like anything is preventing me from going swimming if that’s something I really wish to do ,”
Max sighs, he knows this is an argument that he can’t win. Zee can be too stubborn for his own good.
“You’re horrible, you know that? You could be chilling with your friend, having a good time, but instead you’re choosing to sit here all alone. It makes me wonder why you bothered to come at all,”
“You didn't even give me a choice. You just wouldn't stop talking about it until I gave in. That, plus it's not like we won't do other activities that don’t involve swimming,”
“Fine, fine…You don’t have to swim with me, but could you at least get some water for me to drink? I forgot to bring it with me…I'd really appreciate it if you could go grab it. It should be back in our bungalow,” Max asks with pleading eyes.
“Sure, I can grab that, just stop looking at me like that,” Zee says, standing up quickly, almost too quickly, nearly catching his sandals in the folds of his towel.
Glancing over his shoulder, Zee was checking to see if Max saw him nearly fall face first in the sand. Thankfully he was distracted by the rolling waves, completely missing his friend's usual clumsy ways. He turns again, rushing to get away from Max before he changes his mind and continues to pursue his goal of getting Zee to swim with him.
“Thanks,”
Zee just nods in return, before walking in the direction of their bungalow, thinking about a tune that's been on his mind since breakfast. He hopes that he’ll get back to his room to write it down before he forgets any of it. Because of this though, he wasn't paying attention to where he was going.
“Ow,” Someone exclaims the second Zee feels himself colliding with something, or rather someone, quite hard. Luckily, he can catch himself before falling. The other person, however, isn’t as fortunate.
“I’m so sorry, I wasn’t paying attention,” He says, offering his hand to the person, some guy, that he just bumped into.
He takes Zee’s offered hand and pulls himself off the ground.
“It’s okay, I wasn’t paying much attention either,” He answers with a voice so soft and gentle, that Zee has a hard time believing it really belongs to him.
“Are you okay? Did you get hurt?”
“I don’t think so...” He says as he checks his body for any injuries, “… No, everything is fine,” He continues before he lifts his head and their eyes meet for the first time.
There is a blinding smile on his face as he looks at Zee, who has to admit, is momentarily caught off guard.
Why is this person smiling at him like that? Is he trying to make him feel better after running into him?
“Okay…” Zee manages to say, but at the same time, he just can’t tear his eyes away from the other.
There is something about him that pulls Zee in. The tune that he had in mind the entire walk over just disappeared and Zee isn’t even mad about it.
All at once, nothing else seemed to matter. It’s like the two of them were in their own little world.
“Nunew! Nunew!” A voice suddenly shouts, successfully bursting their bubble.
It seems that the guy Zee bumped into is called Nunew, because he breaks eye contact and turns around towards the shouting voice that is fast approaching.
“Nunew! There you are, I was looking for you everywhere!” The new guy still shouts, even though he is standing right in front of them now.
'How can such a teeny person yell with such a deafening voice?' Zee can't help but wonder.
“Nat,” The guy, Nunew apparently, replies.
Zee doesn’t know what to do. Should he take his leave? Should he say something before leaving? He doesn’t know. It’s confusing though, because it’s not like they had an actual conversation…no, they just bumped into each other. So yeah, Zee should probably just leave them. So why isn’t he doing exactly that?
“And who is this?” Nat says, turning his undivided attention to Zee, successfully interrupting his inner turmoil.
“Oh, that’s… I’m sorry, what’s your name?” Nunew speaks up, shifting his focus back to him.
“I’m Zee, Zee Pruk Panich,”
“It’s nice to meet you Zee. I’m Nunew Chawarin Perdperiyawong and this is Nat Natasitt Uareksit,” Nunew introduces, once again smiling like he wants to defeat the sun, seeing who can shine the brightest.
“So how did you two meet? I’m sure this is the first time that I’ve heard of you,” Nat asks, looking at Zee, who doesn’t know how he should answer. Luckily, Nunew jumps in for him.
“We had actually just bumped into each other. Neither of us were paying much attention,” He explains, still smiling brightly.
Zee starts to wonder if Nunew is just a generally positive person that is always smiling, or if there is a completely different reason behind his never-ending grin.
“You really need to be more careful where you’re walking Nhu. I’m sorry for my friend. He tends to walk around with his head in the clouds. You aren’t the first person that he bumped into, definitely won’t be the last either,” Nat says which earns him an annoyed glance from his friend.
“It wasn’t his fault. I wasn’t looking where I was going either, and I’m pretty certain it was my fault too,” Zee doesn’t know if it’s even true or not, but somehow he can’t help but feel like he has to protect Nunew.
There is something about the other male that brings out this side in Zee.
Nat just smiles at that before his focus returns to Nunew. They just stare at each other without saying a word. It’s like they’re having a silent conversation.
But is that possible? Does something like that exist?
This certainly seems to be the case because suddenly, Nunew shakes his head like he wants to deny something that Nat just said.
“So Zee, do you live in this area here? Or-”
“Nat!” Nunew interrupts his friend before he can even finish his sentence, “I’m sorry we have to go now, it was nice meeting you Zee. See you around,” Nunew rushes away as he grabs Nat’s hand and pulls him towards the beach, and before Zee can say anything in return, they’re already gone.
Zee stares after them, confused by what just happened.
“Okay?” He mumbles, though he knows that neither Nat nor Nunew will hear him.
Zee stares into the distance for a couple more seconds before he remembers why he even left the beach in the first place. He curses under his breath because the tune that he had managed to hold onto for the whole morning is completely gone. He can’t remember it anymore. Not even a little bit.
It’s all gone, like the melody wasn’t even there in the first place.
Still wondering what had just happened, Zee continues his way back to their bungalow to get the water that his friends will need soon after playing in the scorching sun for hours on end.
Maybe he’ll be lucky and will miraculously remember the tune from this morning again.
But of course, Zee isn’t that lucky. He doesn’t remember the tune. Not on the rest of his way to the bungalow, nor the short time that he was inside to grab the water and his notebook, and not even on his way back to his friends either. It was just gone and Zee can feel his mood plummeting.
“There you are, I was starting to wonder if you got lost on your way,” Max greets him from lying on his towel.
His new friends seem to have left the beach already.
"Thanks," Max adds, smiling at Zee as he grabs one of the water bottles.
“I got caught up in some tune…”
“Seriously? That’s great!” Max shouts excitedly.
Zee understands the obvious excitement from Max, he really does. It’s been a while since he was inspired to compose a song or even write the lyrics for anything.
Four months to be exact… Not that Zee is counting… Okay, he is counting. But only because it’s also been four months since his boyfriend unexpectedly broke up with him. All for him to get with a girl that he’d been sleeping with for the majority of their relationship.
Zee, who can be extremely insecure, was obviously hurt by that. Which is completely understandable, because his parents were everything but loving with him. Then, throughout high school, he hung out with the wrong group of people that always seemed to put everything else before Zee, but would always expect him to drop everything and run once one of them got into trouble. Which would actually happen a lot back then.
So when Zee met his now ex-boyfriend, he didn’t dare to dream at first, but Saint was different from his parents and his high school friends. He would always put Zee first and look out for him. Saint made Zee braver than he really was.
So to find out that their relationship didn’t mean that much to Saint broke him…and his friends know that. They know about Zee’s past and how much it meant to him that Saint was different. That he always made sure to show Zee that he means the world to him. Oh, how hopelessly in love Zee was back then.
He would write countless love songs for Saint, about Saint. People on campus would talk about his performances and how much they loved his songs and how sensitive Zee comes across in his lyrics. That they also admire how he writes about his feelings and how open he is with his emotions. According to his friends, there is a good amount of people that would downright love to be in Saint’s place.
Before and after their breakup. Not that Zee would actually believe any of them.
If Saint, who he was with for over two years, was able to break up with Zee just like that and had cheated on him all that time, how could he believe that anybody else wouldn’t do the same?
So, after a heartbreak, you would expect to be able to write songs about it, correct? Songs about being sad, crying, being angry, just anything in that general direction. But no, apparently Zee wasn’t one of those people, because no matter how much he tried, he just couldn’t find the inspiration in himself to write lyrics to a new song or compose anything.
At first, Zee tried not to let it bother him too much because writer’s block can happen to all of us, right?
But with the first month passing by, and still no new inspirations in sight, Zee started to get a bit nervous.
After the second month, it got worse…and after the third, Zee started to wonder if that had been it.
Maybe he just wasn’t able to write anymore? Maybe it was time to look for something else to do as a future career path. Even though Zee always loved working on music, maybe that was the universe's way of telling him that music just wasn’t the thing for him anymore.
With the fourth month starting, his friends didn’t want him to keep this up anymore. They wanted him to quit worrying about music and stop thinking about Saint, so they came up with a game plan: go on a vacation together after the next semester ends.
At first, Zee would rather he not go because he didn’t think it would help him at all, and he doesn’t even like going to the beach in the first place. Though in the end, his friends always knew how to get him to agree.
But then something came up that their other friends couldn't join them just yet. So for now, it was just Zee and Max.
He didn’t expect that inspiration would hit him on their second day. Maybe this whole idea of a vacation wasn’t as bad as he thought it would be.
“Yeah, it would have been, but I lost it before I could write it down,” Zee hates to say this, he doesn’t want to kill Max’s excitement, but he has to.
He knows Max would like to hear that he had written it down, but he would just have to admit that he wasn’t able to.
“Noooo, why?,” Max exclaims, “You always have something to write with when you go out,”
“Well, I didn’t expect to be inspired, so I hadn’t taken it with me,”
They stay silent for a short moment. Max doesn’t look as excited as he did just a few seconds ago. Suddenly, he lights up again.
“Don’t worry, our vacation just started. There is plenty of time for you to work on some new tunes or beautiful lyrics.” Max says, lying back down.
Zee wants to share the same excitement as Max, he really does, but all he can do is smile lightly. He just doesn’t believe it.
“Yeah, sure…”
“Cheer up Zee. I’m certain you’ll remember it again when you least expect it. And even if you can’t, this vacation will be good for you,” Max replies, with a supportive look on his face.
“Thanks, I hope you’re right...”
“Zee!” A familiar voice suddenly shouts.
He looks around. He knows that voice, he heard it not long ago.
Could it be?
“Zee, hey! It really is you,” Nunew beams as he stops in front of their parasol.
“So, we meet again,” Zee can feel himself smiling back even though he doesn’t want to.
There is something about Nunew that seems to make it impossible to not enjoy his company, even if you had just met him.
“Hey Zee,” Nat says, and only then, Zee realizes that the shorter guy also came with him.
How did he miss him? It’s not like Nat is that small.
“Nat,” Zee replies, the smile still glued to his face.
“Care to introduce me to your new friends?” Max asks.
Zee turns towards Max, who is curiously looking at the two newcomers. Well, that's until Max catches Nat's attention and they just stare at each other for a moment.
Zee isn't sure what’s going on. It reminds him of his earlier meeting with Nunew where they would forget about everything else around them. Their friends seem to be in a similar situation.
“That’s Nunew and Nat,” he replies, “Nunew and I bumped into each other earlier, and Nat was out looking for him. That's how I met him too,”
“Nice to meet you, I’m Max,"
Zee watches his friend, who is currently showing off his most charming smile. Nat seems to like it.
“Nice to meet you too,” Nat says, returning the smile.
And did Nat just wink at Max? Are they seriously flirting right now?
Zee shakes his head at the antics of his friend.
“So… Are you guys on vacation too?” Max asks when nobody else speaks up.
“Kind of? We don’t live far from here, but right now we are on a vacation of sorts I guess,” Nunew answers, but he doesn’t go into detail about what exactly that’s supposed to mean.
“I don’t understand?” Max asks, exactly as Zee was thinking.
“It’s nothing special, we’re just from a place not too far from here…”
“Then why did you decide to visit here specifically? Didn’t you want to go somewhere farther away?”
“Nunew’s parents are quite strict. They don’t allow him to go too far-off, so we visited somewhere that is near enough for them, and now here we are I suppose,” Nat chimes in.
“Your parents didn’t ALLOW you? Wait, how old are you guys?” Max asks, quickly sitting up. Zee is glad that his friend is so nosey, because he wants to know more about the two strangers too… especially Nunew.
Nunew and Nat look at each other, and it’s strange. It feels like they’re talking to each other again without the need to actually speak words to one another. Just how they had done earlier when Zee met them for the first time.
Something else that seems quite unusual is the fact that it seems they have to discuss how to answer Max’s question, almost like they have no idea how old they’re supposed to be.
But maybe Zee is just imagining things.
After all, he was always the guy with a fantastical imagination, which had helped him a lot in the past when he was still writing music.
“I'm 20, almost 21, while Nunew is 21, turning 22 in a few weeks. How about you two?” Answered Nat.
“We’re both 24,” Max replies.
“Do you attend any colleges near here?” Zee asks. He just can't contain his curiosity anymore.
It's weird. Zee still remembers when he met Saint for the first time. Back then, he was rather quiet. It was mostly Saint who asked him questions until Zee reached the point of being comfortable enough in his presence to open up.
He hates how his mind drifts off, thinking about his ex again. Why does his mind have to go there right now?
Is it because how Max and Nunew interact is so different from how his friend would act with Saint?
Saint never understood that the friendship between him and Max runs deeper than many others might. They understand each other. They know when one might need to talk and when the other might just need some time to themselves. They know what to do when one of them isn’t feeling well.
And Saint, well, he always thought that Max didn't think of Zee as just a friend. He always tried to make Zee believe that his friend is in love with him. It drove him mad that Zee didn't stop hanging out with Max, no matter how many times Saint asked him to.
And regardless of how many times Zee would tell him that Max is just a good friend, Saint just wouldn’t believe him.
Thinking back on it, Zee's friends were never fond of Saint either. Sure, they would never say anything bad about him, but they always acted kind of reserved towards him.
“We do. It’s pretty small so you probably don’t know it, but it’s just what we need. A place that is still close to home, but far enough that Nunew here can still feel some kind of freedom,” Nat answers, just to end up getting an elbow in his side.
Seems like Nunew didn’t like the way that Nat is talking about him.
Max is about to say something, and probably wants to know more about what Nat seems to be implying, but Zee can see that Nunew is starting to feel uneasy.
“Max, just stop asking so many questions. You’re making Nunew uncomfortable,” He whispers to his friend, suddenly not caring for how nosy he always is.
Max looks at Nunew, and you can tell that he realizes only then that Nunew doesn’t seem to enjoy the topic of their conversation.
“I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable just now. I tend to forget that not everybody likes to fully disclose their whole life in front of someone they’ve just met,” Max replies quickly.
“It’s okay, I just prefer to not talk about my family that much,” Nunew explains softly.
Suddenly, he turns his head and looks Zee right in the eyes. Then he smiles again, ever so brightly, like he did earlier that day. It’s practically blinding, yet also incredibly beautiful, that Zee can’t help but to stare.
They’re frozen, gazing into each other’s eyes, until suddenly, Nat bumps into Nunew.
Nunew turns beet red as he shifts towards his friend who mouths something that Zee can’t understand. But it seems to be a question as Nunew nods his head.
“We have to go now, but maybe we can meet again and have some fun together,” Nat says grinning.
There is a glint in his eyes that his suggestion means more than just hanging out and having fun as friends, but Zee could be wrong. It’s not like he knows Nat all that well.
And then Zee realizes that Nat didn’t say this to tease Nunew, but that he was actually looking at Max who seems to like this suggestion a lot.
“That would be great actually. How about you give me your numbers and I’ll make a group chat so we can discuss this more,” Max replies excitedly.
Zee only nods at that. He doesn't know what to think of the whole situation. Sure, he would want to see Nunew again, but what about Nat's suggestion? Zee isn't sure if he is open to more than a friendship.
Nat smiles at Max, suddenly there is nothing mischievous about it. It’s just an enormously bright smile that makes Nat look quite innocent.
Nunew and Zee watch the two exchanging numbers before they all bid their goodbyes. The pair watch Nunew and Nat leave before turning their attention to each other.
“So, they seem nice,” Max says first. There is a shit-eating grin on his face.
“Yeah,” Zee replies.
"So…what do you think about Nunew? You seemed to be pretty interested in him,"
“He seems nice..."
"Just nice? Nothing more?"
“I don’t know what you mean,” Zee replies.
He tries not to show any reaction to his friend's teasing, but it's easier said than done. Zee can feel himself blushing, thinking of Nunew and his brighter than the sun, than all the galaxies combined really, smile. Or Nunew and his sparkling eyes that put every star to shame. Or his beautifully soft voice that sounds like the loveliest melody he’s ever heard. He wonders if the younger can sing...
“It’s totally fine if you like Nunew, he seems nice…Nat too...” Max replies, his words trailing off.
“Yeah, I suppose” Zee doesn’t know what else to say.
“Maybe you two will become friends or possibly even something more…”
“We’re here on vacation Max, it would be pointless to start something like that if we have to leave at the end of summer,”
“You do know that summer hookups exist right?”
“And you know that I’m not the type for something like that. I need a deeper connection with someone,” Zee knows that Max knows that too.
He also knows that his friend wants him to stop being heartbroken about Saint and move on. Because no matter how many times Zee has told his friends that he’s over Saint, they just don’t seem to believe him.
“You could always try, and even if nothing else happens between you two, you could still have a nice time,”
“I’ll think about it,” Zee mumbles, though he doesn’t particularly mean it.
Sure, Nunew is attractive, insanely attractive actually, but that doesn’t mean Zee is going to jump into something that quick. He needs more than just plain attraction. He wants a deeper connection, body and soul, and for that Zee needs a hell of a lot more time than just their vacation.
“Please don’t just say this, but actually think about it,” Max says. He knows him and that Zee just needs that little extra push to try and at least get to know Nunew.
Zee nods. There is nothing else for him to say. He knows that Max won’t push him any further, but will still be disappointed when their vacation ends and still nothing has happened with Nunew. But for the time being, Zee tries not to dwell on it.
“Well, I know for sure that I'll try my luck with Nat. He seems to be intrigued as well,” Max says, moving on from one topic to the next.
“You just met, how can you be so sure?"
“Because, I saw the way he was looking at me. I have a feeling that he’s interested and wants to get to know me as more than just friends. He looks like a lot of fun and maybe we will have a great time while we’re here,"
“Or…he will realize that you’re a boring person," Zee tries to tease him, though it can’t be further from the truth.
Max isn't boring. He is actually rather funny and intelligent. People normally love Max...well, except for Saint, but that was just his jealousy talking. Zee is sure that they could have been great friends too if it wasn’t for Saint’s jealousy putting a barrier between them.
“There is no way that will happen. I'm too charming for that to even be a possibility,” Max exclaims, a mischievous smile on his lips.
Zee can’t help but smile at his antics. It would be Nat's loss if he doesn't see that Max is an amazing person.
Zee doesn’t know how Max does this. Things always seem so simple for him, while Zee is stuck thinking about his ex too often. Why is it so difficult to move on?
When did it become so challenging to talk to others? He has his fair share of interests, but somehow it became impossible for him to talk to an actual person about them. Saint would always appear in his mind, making little comments that would throw him off.
They were comments the other would make during their relationship. Things like he doesn't understand it when Zee is talking about his love for music and composing. Or that it's boring when Zee tries to explain something to him. Or about his love for nature, the simple things in life making him sound so bland.
But Nunew does seem nice and there is a certain connection between them… God, that sounds weird even to Zee. But there has to be something, because why is it so hard to break eye contact with Nunew? Why can’t he stop thinking about him when they’ve only just met?
Zee sighs, why is this so complicated? Or is it just him making it harder than it has to be?
“Let’s just wait until after our meeting, okay? I want to learn a little more about Nunew before deciding what to do. Maybe he isn’t even interested,”
“Fine, but I can guarantee you that Nunew is completely interested. I totally got those vibes earlier,” Max replies. He looks so animated that Zee agrees on giving it a try.
‘Let’s just hope that it won’t go wrong and nothing bad will happen,' Zee still can’t help but think.