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Chip had come to the conclusion that it was impossible to fluster his co-captain. Believe him, he tried. But over the surprisingly short amount of time he’d known the Triton, he hadn’t even managed to fluster him once. He wasn’t even sure he’d seen anyone else fluster the other, either. There were times that Gillion got a little shy and nervous, sure, but he could never be described as flustered .
He really wanted to see what a flustered Gillion would look like.
And he tried everything to see it, too, but nothing worked. Not a single damn thing. Compliments and encouragement were met with bright smiles and expressions of gratitude. Fleeting kisses on his cheeks, nose, and forehead were responded to in soft looks and a tiny, adorable amount of minor confusion.
That should have been his first clue.
Often, Gillion showed his own affection for Chip by resting their foreheads together. Or tracing his veins through his arms and hands. Sometimes, he’d settle his fingers just above a pulse point and stay there for a while, a little smile on his face and a distant look in his eyes.
Those should have been his second clue.
But for some reason, no matter the variety in forms of affection he bestowed upon Gillion, he just couldn’t get Gillion to be flustered, or even the slightest bit bashful about affection.
So, he laid on the deck and pondered, staring up at the stars that spread just past the sails of the Albatross. He could hear laughter from Lizzie’s ship, probably a couple of crew members getting drunk. Jay was probably asleep downstairs, and he wasn’t sure where Gillion was.
Footsteps approached quietly, and when he glanced over, he was met with an amused blue face surrounded in white hair. Not the fish he’d been thinking about but… y’know.
Caspian had an eyebrow raised as he came to a stop next to Chip’s head. “What is a captain such as yourself doing, laying about?”
The words were filled with something teasing, but Chip smirked. “You say that like your own captain isn’t over there, absolutely plastered.”
Caspian laughed in response, lowering himself onto the deck as well, sitting cross legged next to Chip’s head, leaning back on his hands to stare up at the sky.
“What’s up?” Chip asked, watching Lizzie’s friend. “I’m not sure where Gillion is, if that’s-“
Caspian chuckled. “No, no. I was coming to talk to you, actually.”
“Oh,” Chip said, unsure how exactly to respond. “Look if this is about the squirty thing back on Joaldo, I genuinely- I had no idea what it meant-”
Caspian’s laugh cut him off, making his cheeks flush with embarrassment at the memory. “No, no, my friend. It’s not that at all. I’ve just- I’ve noticed how you’ve begun to act around Gillion. I was simply curious about the change in behavior. Are you intending on courting him?”
Chip coughed, eyes going wide. “I, uh-” he cut himself off. “I guess? I dunno, we haven’t really talked about it. But we’re- affectionate . In a way that’s more than just between friends. It’s not official, but I’d like for him to be my- my boyfriend.” The word sent something through him; something both excited and terrified.
Humming, Caspian sat in silence for a moment as he watched the stars. “You clearly remember the squirty incident, yes? You were unaware of the implications to such a request.”
Chip nodded slowly, unsure where exactly this was going or how it related.
Smiling down at him, Caspian said, “Exactly. You are unaware of many Undersea traditions and cultural practices. That is perfectly okay, considering you had no reason to learn. However, now, you do. The Undersea has different traditions and shows of affection when it comes to courtship. Perhaps learning these things may help with your hope to be ‘official’.”
Thinking back on it, he really should have thought about that. About how different Gill’s culture was in almost every other aspect. Why would they share the same traditions surrounding this sort of thing? But- “Affection?” He asked. “You’ve got different ways of showing affection?”
Caspian turned his head up to stars once more. “Of course. I never did truly understand why you Oversea folk choose to kiss, when listening to one another’s hearts, or allowing someone to be close to a pulse point is so much more meaningful. I do not mean to minimize your traditions- they just don’t make much sense to me.”
“Huh.” Chip said, returning his own gaze to the stars. “So what other kinds of affection do you have?”
Shifting, Caspian laid down so that his head rested next to Chip’s, with the rest of his body pointing the opposite direction. “Most of them have to do with trust and instinct. Instinctually, you want to protect anywhere vulnerable: pulse points, your stomach, your eyes, your neck. For Tritons it extends to their gills, their ears, and their fins as well. But allowing someone to come near those areas is a major sign of trust, because you are potentially putting your life into their hands.
“Undersea folk also put a lot of importance into gift giving. It’s nearly never a show of material wealth, but rather to show someone that they were thought of, and worth the effort to acquire the gift or the time spent creating it. Tritons tend to love shiny things, especially when coming from a romantic partner.” Caspian paused for a moment, and Chip soaked in the information, saving it to use later. “Come to think of it, I can’t remember Gillion having many shiny things. Being the Champion, I can’t imagine him having many friends with all of the training.”
Chip didn’t want to think about the implications of that- that Gillion was never given much in the past- and Caspian didn’t really seem to want to voice it either. Instead, he remained silent for a moment. Thinking about the past few months spent with Gillion, he thought about how grateful the Triton was toward Jay because of the armour she bought him. He thought of the necklace Aslana gave him, and the sword that Caspian himself let Gillion borrow.
And then he thought about all the times Gillion had rested on top of him, ear pressed to his chest, or fingers resting above a pulse point.
Caspian cleared his throat quietly and began talking again. “I’ve also heard that Tritons are similar to sharks in that they bite to show affection. Softly, of course, but, you know.”
Amused, Chip said, “That’s not one that Gillion’s done yet.”
A chuckle sounded from beside him. “That’s because he’s afraid of hurting you. Or coming off as aggressive when he simply wishes to express his love. He understands that it’s not a form of affection here, so he doesn’t let himself do it.”
“Has he- told you this?” Chip asked, turning his head to the Genasi.
Caspian simply smiled. “No, but it is incredibly easy for me to read him.”
“Oh. Well- thanks, for this.” Chip cleared his throat. “I’ll, uh- take Undersea stuff more into account in the future. I wish-” he paused. “I wish he felt more comfortable with his differences in affection.” In all reality, Chip could see himself growing to understand what each type of affection could mean, and appreciating them just as much as a denizen of the Undersea might.
Caspian hummed. “He will. Eventually. You just need to make sure he knows that it’s okay for him to show affection in that way. Normalize it.”
Thinking about it, Chip imagined tucking his face into Gillion’s neck, or listening to his heart, or tracing his fins. He could get used to the idea, he decides, as long as it made Gillion happy.
“Thank you,” Chip said, finding himself genuinely meaning it.
Laughing quietly, Caspian said, “I just want to make sure he’s happy, and taken care of. I believe you’ll do that. But if you don’t…” leveling him with a stare, Caspian’s voice filled with something serious and heartfelt. “I’ll make sure he never has to see you again.”
Something about it made Chip’s blood run cold. Maybe it was the fact that it wasn’t quite a threat in the way most threats were, or maybe it was the thought of never seeing Gillion again. Maybe it was the idea of failing Gillion so heavily.
“I hope for all of our sake that it doesn’t happen.”
Caspian smiled and nodded. “You’re a good man. A bastard, yes. But a good man.”
Laughing in response, Chip watched as Caspian stood up once again before mock saluting and walking off to rejoin his crew.
As he glanced up at the moon, Chip realized just how late it had gotten. He picked himself up from where he lay and began the descent down into the captain’s quarters where Jay slept peacefully in her bunk.
Gillion, on the other hand, was curled up on Chip’s bed, playing with Pretzel. Upon Chip’s appearance in the cabin, Gillion glanced up and smiled. He wiggled around in the bed to make room as Chip came closer, smiling as Pretzel climbed on top of Gillion and settled on his shoulder.
He climbed onto the bed next to Gillion, laying on his side to look at the other. Pretzel climbed down in between the two of them and settled down with a coo. Smiling at Gillion, Chip brushed a piece of the Triton’s hair behind his ear. His hand hovered there for a moment as he thought about Caspian’s wards. Carefully, he traced the edge of Gillion’s ear fin, taking note of the feeling of it under his fingers.
Gillion’s eyes widened slightly and a mildly confused look crossed his face and a slight blush darkened his cheeks. His smile reflected the adorable confusion in his eyes as he caught Chip’s wrist before it dropped to the bed.
Chuckling quietly, Chip softly said, “Hey.”
Gillion didn’t respond, instead looking at Chip’s hand and running his fingers along the visible veins, tracing them. Two of his fingers stilled over his inner wrist, where Chip knew you could feel his pulse strongly. A soft smile crossed Gilion’s face as he looked up to meet Chip’s eyes.
“We never did define the parameters of our relationship.” Gilion’s hand retracted from Chip’s as he opened his palm out to Pretzel, who climbed in to be moved back to her perch on Gillion’s shoulder. Chip laughed quietly at the sentence that was so like Gillion.
Taking a breath, he wiggled his way closer to the other in order to press their foreheads together. “We don’t need a definition, if we don’t want one.”
Gillion paused for a moment, thinking over the words. “Yes, but… what we want out of the relationship, and-” he took a baited breath, hesitating. “-boundaries. Those are important.”
Something proud erupted in Chip’s chest. He’d never been the greatest at setting boundaries, and he could tell that Gillion struggled with it as well. Unless that boundary came to lying, of course. The blame couldn’t really be placed on him though, considering his upbringing, or what little Chip knew of it. He knew that the other was raised by the Undersea’s Elders, and that he was taught to be a weapon. Chip could only imagine the kind of punishment that he’d receive if he went against any training. That sort of childhood wasn’t exactly conducive to someone who then knew how to make their own decisions and set boundaries.
Even the decisions and boundaries that Gillion did set were guided by the training he received. His hate for lying, and decisions to put himself in the middle of a situation because his moral compass deemed that he had to. It was hard for Gillion to think for himself, and that Chip knew. Which is why so much pride bloomed when Gillion suggested boundaries.
Nodding, Chip said, “Would you like to go first?”
Hesitating again, Gillion furrowed his eyebrows. His hand made its way back to Chip’s and for a moment, he just focused on Chip’s fingers, tracing them and moving them experimentally. He settled on spinning the simple silver band he’d given Chip when they were in the B.L.O.C.K. “You still wear this?”
“You wear yours,” Chip responded simply. When Gillion smiled but just kept playing with the ring, Chip continued, “It meant a lot to me, y’know? That you would help me if it meant you had to feel the same pain I felt every time I got hurt. My well-being was worth it to you. It meant a lot, and the ring is- it’s a physical reminder. Of what you did for me.” He’d never actually voiced that. Not to Gillion, or the rest of the crew. Even Jay had asked a few times, but he’d always just brushed her off and changed the topic.
Gillion nodded, smiling softly. “You liked my gift.”
And, oh , Chip’s heart did a funny little flip at the soft words. He thought back to what Caspian said about gift giving, and shiny things being more reserved for romantic partners. Gillion wasn’t typically one for speaking softly, but when he did, Chip knew that those words held more weight that the loud ones ever would.
“Of course I do.” Chip leaned forward slightly to place a kiss on the tip of GIllion’s nose, making him laugh softly and get the adorably confused look he always did when Chp kissed him. There was something slightly different about the expression tonight, though, that Chip couldn’t put a finger on. “If you don’t want to talk about the boundary stuff, right now, that’s okay. We can wait until tomorrow.”
The expression faded from Gillion’s face, replaced with something calm. Nodding, he said, “please.” Chip smiled softly and ran his fingers up Gillion’s arms, pausing at the base of a fin that grew from his forearm. Carefully, he traced the veins just barely visible below the skin of the fin. He could feel Gillion tense slightly, and the tiny inhale that made him freeze for a moment, worried that he’d done something wrong.
Maybe Caspian had gotten it wrong? Mayb fin touching was different in Triton culture? Caspian didn’t have any fins, so maybe he’d gotten that part wrong.
But then he glanced up and met Gillion’s eyes. His cheeks were darkened, and the tiny smile he sported was undoubtedly one that was a little bit flustered. Chip’s eyes widened as he felt a smile spread on his own face.
“Where did you learn this?” Gilion asked, his eyes downcast. “First with the ears, then with the ring, and now- my fins. Your customs- they’re not- where did you learn this?” The question wasn’t demanding, just flustered and confused.
Chip chuckled quietly, closing his eyes and pressing their faces further together so that their noses brushed. “What can I say? I’ve got a few tricks up my sleeves.”
Scowling at him, Gillion squints for a couple of second before giving up with a sigh. “Well, I’ve- I suppse I don’t have much room to speak.”
“Oh?” Chip asks, but before he knows it, Gillion’s lips are pressed to his, and his heart practically stops. He’s only allowed a couple seconds to melt into it before Gillion is pulling away again, a sheepish look in his eyes and a deeper blue coloring his cheeks. “You-“ Chip breathes, unsure what exactly to say. “I thought Tritons don’t really kiss.” His eyes were wide and he could feel a smile smile pulling at his cheeks.
“No, but humans do.” The words were spoken softly, but had such an intensity that Chip was worried he’d combust. There was simplicity in the statement, but Chip could understand what Gillion was trying to get at, because it was exactly why he had listened so intently to Caspian.
It was ‘ I want you to understand my feelings despite our different ways of saying it’ . It was ‘I don’t understand how you show affection, but I’d like to learn, so that I can understand you’. It was ‘ you are important to me. Your culture is important to me’.
It was ‘ I love you. And I want you to know that’.
And how could he stop himself from kissing Gillion again when all of those words were hidden in such a simple statement?
As he kissed the other, his hands came up to cup his cheeks, his fingers twirling the hair that fell just in front of Gillion’s ears. His pinkies fell in line with the other’s jaw, letting him feel the heartbeat just under his fingertips.
Gillion giggled quietly into the kiss. Pulling away ever so slightly, he whispered, “Your pinky is cold.” Chip had forgotten about the prosthetic. He chuckled as he ran his hands through the other’s hair.
Pressing their foreheads together again, Chip had to hold himself back from showering Gillion in even more kisses. Instead, his hands found their way to Gillion’s neck, resting gently and tracing circles into the skin there. He was careful where gills remained closed, ghosting his fingers over the area rather than tracing designs.
Pretzel glared at him from her spot on Gillion’s shoulder, disgruntled at her perch being disturbed. Chuckling, Chip offered his hand, which she latched onto. Gillion held out the jar she usually floated in, having unclipped it from his belt. With the frogtopus returned to her bottle, Gillion reached over Chip to set her on a little table next to the head of the bed.
To make it easier, Chip laid on his back as Gillion reached over him to the nightstand. Instead of fully retracting back to where he laid originally, Gillion hovered over Chip for a moment before deciding to lay half on top of him. He pressed an ear to Chip’s chest, listening to his heartbeat.
Smiling, Chip resumed tracing designs into the other’s skin, instead focusing on his arms and back. Finding the fins on Gillion’s arms again, Chip rubbed the winglike shapes softly. Goosebumps ran up the skin under his fingers and the Triton pressed his face further into Chip’s chest. The reaction made Chip’s heart soar.
“Jay told me about the kissing thing,” Gillion muttered against Chip’s skin, surprising him slightly. “You don’t have any fins to touch, and I figured out that Tritons show affection differently from you. So I asked her how to show affection. She explained it to me.”
If his heart hadn’t already been flipping at the reaction to his touch, it certainly would be now. The words made him feel so deeply important. It sparked a feeling that made him understand just how important he was to Gillion, because Gillion was just that important to him.
Important enough that they’d each learn an entirely different love language in order to make certain that the other understood.
“Caspian explained it to me. Undersea affection.” He smiled when he felt Gillion nod softly.
He could tell that the same message got across.
Chip then came to the conclusion that it wasn’t impossible to fluster his co-captain, after all.
It just took a different language to get Gillion to really understand what was happening. And besides, while seeing a flustered Gillion was fun, it was so much better to know that he felt loved.