Chapter Text
"So, this is goodbye?" I asked Noah, my throat burning as I tried to hold back my cries.
I was angry. I was hurt. This was so sudden; there were no discussions leading up to Noah's decision.
"Come with me to LA, Meels," he pleads, reaching for my hand.
I recoil from his touch, shaking my head at him. "Noah, I'm about to graduate, I can't. You know that."
He sighs, raking his hand through his hair in frustration. Why was he so frustrated? It's not my fault he dropped out of high school to pursue his music career. It's not my fault he thought I'd drop everything in my life for him and follow along like some love-struck puppy.
He hangs his head, defeated, when he sees I'm not budging. "I know. I just thought maybe you'd want to get out of here and start fresh."
I snort sarcastically, folding my arms over my chest. "You are absurd, Noah. You know how hard I studied to get into UR."
He sighs again, harshly, and picks his head up to look at me. His eyes were sullen, his face crestfallen as he accepted my decline in his offer.
I turn away from him, so I don't have to look at his face. I can't stand to see how upset he is when this is his decision to leave, not mine. I can't stand that he's making me feel like the villain.
"Nick is coming with me, you know," he says as I begin to walk away, stopping me dead in my tracks.
"What?" I snapped, spinning back around with anger burning in my veins.
He cringes at my sudden hostility. "I'm sorry, Amelia. This is what's best for me and Nick, for the band. You have to understand that."
I shake my head at him in disbelief, backing away from him. "I hope LA treats you well. Goodbye, Noah."
"Mommy, someone's at the door," Leora tugs at my pant leg, pulling me from my thoughts.
I closed my eyes and took a deep breath as I brushed my hand across the top of her head delicately. I wasn't ready to open the door and face the man I hadn't seen or even spoken to in five years, and I was certainly not ready to spend a weekend locked in a cabin with him and my family for Christmas.
Each year around Christmas time, Nick would fly home and spend the holiday with us. The weekend before Christmas, we'd journey up to our family cabin with our parents and celebrate the holiday. For some unknown reason, Nick decided to have Noah tag along this year, which didn't settle well with me considering our past. Why he thought this was a good idea, I'll never know.
I sighed after a moment and smiled down at my daughter. "Is there? Let's go see who it is!"
She beams at me before trotting over to the front door, throwing it open. "Uncle Nicky!" she exclaims happily as she throws herself into his awaiting arms.
Nick scoops her up and peppers kisses on her face, having her erupt into giggles. He settles her onto his hip after his kiss-attack, "How's my favorite munchkin doing? You excited for Santa to come visit us at the cabin?"
"Uh-huh!" she bobs her head enthusiastically. "I've been a good girl aaallll year, so Santa is going to bring me everything I asked for."
He laughs, "Is that so?"
"Yeah! Mommy said so," she smiles over at me, "right?"
I make my way over to them and brush her bangs back, kissing her now bare forehead. "Yes, babygirl. You've been a very good girl. You're surely on Santa's Nice List this year."
I give Nick a kiss on the cheek as he hands Leora back over to me, who settled in against my side. I take a step back for him to make his way into the living room, his suitcase in hand just as another entity makes an appearance at the door.
My heart was in my throat as my eyes landed on a pair of dark brown eyes, the same as Leora's. My breathing hitched as I took in his gentle stare, a friendly yet unsure smile curling at the corner of his lips. He was still just as good looking as he was in high school, even more so now that his facial features matured, and his haircut no longer covered half his face.
The tattoo on his neck was placed just right where it defined his jawline handsomely—stop it, Amelia.
Leora was already cowering from the tall stranger, burying her face into my sweater, and clinging onto me for dear life. "It's okay, Leo," I cooed while giving her a little bounce. "This is Noah... Uncle Nick's friend. He's spending the weekend with us, can you say 'hi'?"
She whines, shaking her head back and forth against my chest. I chuckled, giving her a kiss on top of her head. "It's okay baby," I whispered, "go on over to Nana and Papa." I drop her to her feet, and she scurries away.
"Long time no see," Noah says as he closes the door behind him. "I didn't know you had a kid."
"Yeah," I scoffed. "I mean, why would you?"
I watch him tense briefly at my curtness, promptly pursing his lips into a tight line and nodding slowly. "Right. How've you been?"
"Fine," I kept it short.
I watch his Adam's apple bob as he swallows. He looks as nervous as I feel. I suppose I could be nicer, more welcoming, and ask him how he was doing, but truthfully, I didn't really care. I turned on my heel and made my way into the kitchen where the rest of my family was, leaving Noah at the foyer by himself.
I smiled to myself as I leaned up against the entryway with my arms crossed, observing the scene before me. Nick, my mom, and Leora were sitting at the kitchen table attempting to put together a gingerbread house as my dad made his checklist for our trip, surely checking it twice.
These were the moments I lived for: the innocence of Leora as she applied an unnecessary amount of icing to the corners of the house as they cemented together—crooked, of course—the excess winding up on her arms, face, and in her hair. Her little tongue poking out as she concentrated on sticking the gumdrops and peppermints on the roof just right. Her giggles as Nick teased her by moving some of her decorations around, mom scolding him to let her be. Dad grumbling to himself as he made sure we had all the essentials for the weekend away.
Everything halted when Noah made his way into the kitchen, the tension filling the room as Leora stared at him with unease, everyone else at me. I felt the hair on the back of my neck stand on end, my heart pounding with anxiety from the uncertainty of how this would all play out looming over me. My family knew of the situation at hand; Noah did not.
I caught my dad's eye, and I know he sees my apprehension. He nods his head just enough for me to see, telling me he would find a way to ease the tension. He clears his throat and taps a spot on his list several times, breaking the silence. "I don't have any kerosene for the lamps in case we lose power in the cabin. Amelia, would you mind running out to the store and getting some?"
I let go of the breath I didn't even know I was holding and nodded. "Sure," I agree, tacking on a fake smile.
I make my way out the kitchen, grabbing my keys off the key rack and shoulder on a jacket. I make my way down the steps, stopping short when I see that my car was blocked in by an unknown vehicle. I sighed, turning around to head back inside to ask Nick to move their rental, only to come face-to-face with Noah. "Let me give you a ride. They haven't finished plowing, the roads are shit," he says.
I swallowed the lump forming in my throat and shake my head, "No, that's alright. Just move the rental and I'll be right back."
He raises an eyebrow, eyeing my tiny Corolla. "You sure that thing will make it?"
I take note of the difference in our vehicles; their rental being a Tahoe, it would make for a safer trip. I sighed, shrugging, "Fair point. Let's go."
The ride to the hardware store was not a comfortable one by any means. It was quiet; too quiet, not even having the radio turned on low to alleviate the tension. The only sounds were the wipers squeaking against the windshield periodically and the crunch of the snow as we drove over it slowly.
I had my elbow rested on the door, my chin planted in my hand as I stared out the window, just wishing for this weekend to be over already. My phone dinged in my hand, and I unlocked it to a picture of Leora smiling wide with Nick. His arm was over her shoulders, her grin showing how proud she was of her finished gingerbread house. I smile softly at my phone after saving the picture to my camera roll.
"She's cute," Noah's velvety voice fills the cab.
I glance over at him, seeing he had been looking at my phone before I locked it. "Thanks."
"How old is she?"
I close my eyes and take a deep breath. Here we go; cue the small talk. I exhale, "She's three."
I lie about her age by a year, hoping to deter him from the truth. He stays silent for a moment, and my heart begins to pound as I prayed to God that he doesn't see through my lie about her age and put two and two together. Not yet anyway.
"Huh. Nick never told me he had a niece," he says matter-of-factly.
I wanted so badly to tell him that it didn't pertain to him, but deep down I knew that it did. Leora was Noah's daughter, after all, and he had every right to know about her. I never told him simply due to the fact we severed our ties, and I figured we'd be better off without him in our lives. We've been doing just fine without him.
I shrugged, "Must not have been on top priority, with your music and all."
He lets out a sarcastic chuckle. "Must not have."
I slumped against my door, putting my chin back in my hand. The rest of the ride to the store was quiet after that, the air thick between us.
We didn't speak to one another until we grabbed the kerosene and headed back to the Tahoe. Noah puts a hand on my shoulder when I go to open the back door to put the cans in, stopping me. I roll my eyes and turn my head towards him, "What? Can't let me put these in here myself?"
He shakes his head, tugging me away from the rental. "There's something on the door handle. Someone tampered with the car—stay away from it."
I furrow my brows and scoffed. "What are you talking about, Noah? We're the only ones out here."
He moves me behind him as he makes his way over to the Tahoe, cupping the sides of his eyes to look in through the tinted windows. I put the kerosene on the ground and folded my arms over my chest, now annoyed and cold, watching him take his time inspecting the car. I watched him shake his head and shrug as he turned back towards me, indicating there wasn't anything out of the ordinary inside. "All clear," he says, opening the back door for me.
I pick up the cans and place them on the floor before heading around the back, making my way to the passenger seat. I stopped dead in my tracks when I saw a dark figure as I rounded the backside of the Tahoe. I barely had time to gasp before he took hold of me, spinning me around and wrapping his arm around my throat. "I finally found you," he whispers menacingly in my ear.
"No—" I tried to call for Noah, but he slaps a gloved hand over my mouth.
I tried prying at his arm, hoping I'd get him to release me as he dragged me backwards. Gasping against his hand, I tasted something sweet as my mouth began to dry up, my head becoming cloudy. The more I tried to fight against him, the less air I was able to take in, the panic now settling in quickly. Becoming weak, I gave up and let my body go limp in his grasp as he continued to hold his hand against my mouth and nose.
The last thing I saw before fading away was a blurry image of Noah, panic-stricken as he watched my captor take hold of me.