Chapter Text
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hyuuung, wanna sleepover?
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sure, 2 weeks?
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if it's okay and not a trouble, yes, pls.
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ofc not~~ be there soon~
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yayy~ already washed your clothes.
oh! i also made you food~~
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that's my baby, see ya~~~
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🥳
Jimin and Jeongguk have this pact they made when they moved out of their parents' houses that if one of them really needed it, they'd sleepover at each other's place for a fortnight. The reason didn't matter. At least, not right away, or not at all. What mattered was that they had each other's back during that time.
Each would find a way around their jobs and explain to partners—if they had one during the time—that this was something the best friends did for each other to get over a slump. Over the years, some partners grew jealous of this pact because none of them understood the depths of the friendship between the two, so more often than not, their sleepovers extended to cry with each other.
Luckily, their jobs were far easier to deal with.
At 25, Jeon Jeongguk worked as a business intelligence analyst by day and played video games professionally during weekends. His regular work paid enough to cover most of his basic necessities, so while he didn't expect that a lot of people enjoyed his game streams to pay more than enough, it was a welcome opportunity as it allowed him to move to a better area, enjoy the hobby, and go on trips during vacations. It also didn't hurt that it made sure he got his monthly sessions and the treatment he really needed.
Meanwhile, Park Jimin, 2 years older, joined an entertainment company as a dance instructor and choreographer after being recruited by a talent scout following his graduation recital. It was all very exciting as he got to work with idols once in a while and led sessions in contemporary dance and hip hop. It pays well enough, especially with the quarterly benefits like cash bonuses and career advancement aid in case they want to pursue relevant fields in the industry further. He's pretty satisfied overall. He does have plans to start his own agency, but for the meantime, he'd rather build his reputation well and learn as much as he can about this world.
Their schedules were chaotic on the regular, but they always found a way to ensure that their pact was honoured. It was tough in the beginning, especially when they still lived in their parents' homes, and they weren't able to afford a place properly, but once they found their niche and were able to save up enough, the two didn't hesitate moving out, one after the other with their own places.
Their families once asked why they couldn't just room together to save more money, but Jimin argued that it was better for them to grow self-sufficient as adults. Plus, it's also nice to have your own space after living with family for so long. It was a chance to finally explore and carve out your identity after all. And it's not like they lived that far from each other. If anything, it was just about two train rides away, their work a little farther, but still within the metro for their routine to work seamlessly.
Sometimes, Jimin chuckles to himself about it all, since it wasn't like he and Jeongguk tried to make their work and places be this convenient for them, but it just happened that their workplaces and apartments over the years became subconsciously intertwined. Jeongguk would call it fate, of course, and Jimin wouldn't argue too much about it because he believed that destiny was something you really wanted and worked towards.
Once he gathered his gym bag for some stuff and the dance fits he needed for the duration of their routine, he snapped photos of his whole apartment and attached it in an email about his two-week vacation to his landlord. To be fair, his landlord, Min Yoongi, is chill as fuck and said there was no need for stuff like this since he knew Jimin was a good tenant, but just for transparency, he'd rather things were laid out in case something happened while he was gone. He'd hate for any of his neighbours to do him dirty with false accusations.
He left the place then, going to a store and getting Jeongguk some fish bread ice cream, seaweed snacks, chicken, cup noodles, and banana milk in case his stock ran out. As he watched the city view zip by on the train, Jimin wondered what the reason was for the pact this time, but mostly, he was just looking forward to seeing his dongsaeng's sweet face after so long. He'd been away to Tokyo for a month because of a show, and while he didn't really miss any updates on Jeongguk's life since they talk nearly daily, it was still better to hug him and ruffle his hair. It's because there were also times where they might talk daily, but something big was happening in the younger's life, and he wouldn't know until the issue was concluded because Jeongguk preferred to handle things by himself before asking for help.
He sighed a little at that thought before moving aside to let a pregnant lady sit on the designated pink chairs in front of him. Not long after, he got off the train and texted Jeongguk that he was a few mins away from his apartment. And this dongsaeng's apartment, seriously. Their elevators just had to be broken today. Jeongguk's place was on the 7th floor, so it won't be that much of a trouble, but whoever wanted this inconvenience? Certainly not the PWDs, but more so someone like him, who'd just gone through a rough day of rehearsal last night.
He'd curse Jung Hoseok for the routine, but that's just the standard that their company and the dancers themselves preferred to have. He sped through the staircase then, daydreaming about the soft couch Jeongguk had in his living room, and rang the door before shortly being let in, and ah—
"Hyung!!!"
A solid wall of muscle cushions his face as he gets in, and while this was not a strange occurrence for Jeongguk since summer has started to greet them with dizzying walks after 10 AM, it took a few seconds for Jimin to collect himself and return the hug.
"Ggukkie, baby, perhaps let's close the door so we can enjoy ice cream?" Jimin asks with a smile as he rubs his nose and offers his bag of groceries with the other hand.
Jeongguk closes the door immediately and takes the bag from him, grinning as he scans the items inside before putting them inside the fridge. "Hyung, you really shouldn't have—I bought some of them for you, too!"
"All the more for the fortnight, mm?" Jimin pats the side of Jeongguk's waist as he locates the younger's oversized white shirt hanging on the side of the couch and hands it to him. "You might get cold if I turn the A/C on. Do you mind? I'll just put my stuff in your room."
Jeongguk shakes his head with a smile, puts the shirt on, and places glasses of water and some gimbap rolls he made for them on a table beside the couch. Jimin finds him seated there a few moments later, quickly scanning shows to watch before ultimately deciding on the first Iron Man film again. He sneaks up behind him, gets over the couch, and spoons him until they are laid sideways, and Jeongguk laughs from the surprise.
Then they grow silent, and Jimin closes his eyes as Jeongguk leans into his hold more. A few moments later, he rubs the younger's chest and feels him breathe more slowly, the rapid thud of his heartbeat becoming gentler beneath his fingertips.
They don't talk for a long time. Words might be too early for a time like this. So he holds the younger close, moving from his chest to ruffle his hair. Jimin could feel Jeongguk falling asleep, but just when he thought he would, his dongsaeng moved around to face him and nuzzle his neck.
Jeongguk sighed long, and the weight of his exhale made Jimin frown in concern, but it would do no good to ask, so he just caressed the younger's back gently.
The silence, coldness of the room, combined with Jeongguk's fresh scent made his eyes a little droopy, but he blinked himself awake, especially when the younger finally looked up at him with pale, dry lips. He must've been biting them for a while too, Jimin observed—it was an anxious habit his dongsaeng struggled with. So he kissed Jeongguk's forehead and shook his head, letting the other know that if he didn't want to talk, he didn't have to do so yet.
But he knew that those dry lips were probably hurting so he took the petroleum jelly he knew Jeongguk kept on the side table momentarily and plopped beside him again. He gingerly put a bit of it on the younger's mouth, taking extra care when Jeongguk flinched when he got to the side of his mouth and rubbed the excess with the sleeve of his hoodie. Then he placed the container back and immediately went to ruffle Jeongguk's hair.
His dongsaeng began to cry softly then, so Jimin patted his cheeks and kissed it over and over until the younger breathed normally and hugged him tighter around the waist.
"Thank you," Jeongguk whispered, eye lashes wetting the slope of his neck, but he didn't care. "I've been stable, but it's just been really tough. It really was."
"I could feel it, Ggukkie, it's okay," he replied, patting the younger's head as Jeongguk put a leg over his.
"I've not slept, hyung. For three days. At most, it was 4-5 hours, not enough. Then yesterday, I drank coffee so today I only slept for 2. I almost forgot to take my meds, but fortunately, I made sure to have alarms, but it just wasn't enough. I also emailed my doctor, but the earliest appointment won't be until Tuesday next week. I know I shouldn't have drank coffee, but I'm just not really feeling it these past few weeks. It'd probably be worse if I was unmedicated, but it's just hard."
"I'd also go to a ward or an ER, but getting to the good ones will take a lot of time so I got lazy. There are other options, but I read reviews so I got lost and forgot all about it and just got overwhelmed, so I tried to sleep. But I couldn't. I cried, but it wasn't enough. I even tried to masturbate, but still, I was awake. It's annoying as fuck. I couldn't shut my mind off even when I wasn't thinking of anything—I was literally just laying on my bed. I even played music to maybe help, but it made me awake anyway. So I turned it off. So I laid there, hugging my pillows, making myself comfortable to no avail. But nothing. So I opened IG to bore me but I cried and I don't exactly know why. I'm so fucking tired. But maybe my mind finally got exhausted, so it was only then that I was able to sleep. Then I woke up and got your stuff ready and tried to nap but no, I was awake already. And here we are—sorry," Jeongguk spoke, paced and raspy from exhaustion until he lisped.
Jimin listened to it all patiently, not once stopping his caresses to the younger, so once Jeongguk finished, he hugged him tightly for a long time.
"You don't have to say sorry, Ggukkie," Jimin said, easing his hold a little to tuck a stray hair from the younger's forehead behind his ear. "Going through mania is always rough. But you did what you could. You did all that, yeah? You tried. And that shows how strong you are, my baby. Don't you forget it."
A tear fell from Jeongguk's swollen eyes.
"Hyung," he gasped, tugging his shirt with a fist as he cried again.
Jimin kissed the top of his head. Once the younger calmed down a little, he sat them both up, Jeongguk on his lap as he drew comforting circles on his back. The younger was still hiding his face on his neck, but that's okay because he knows Jeongguk feels a little shy right now. Truthfully, it was making his legs numb, but he couldn't complain because Jeongguk really needed it, so he hugged him some more.
He could fall asleep like this, if Jeongguk wanted it too. The younger may think that he's the only one being comforted, but the warmth of his presence right now filled a void Jimin didn't realise he felt until he saw his dongsaeng's sweet face and hugged him.
So just like this, even if it would take a while, it didn't matter—because everything else in the forefront of his mind fell away to make space for his favourite person.
"Hyung, I think I need to eat now," Jeongguk whispered after a while.
Jimin nodded against him, letting him slide away from his lap to get the table rolling in front of them for their meal. He missed the younger's warmth, but it's not like they won't spend the rest of the fortnight together, so it's okay.
They got to the scene where Obadiah Stone confessed to betraying Tony Stark and his family when Jeongguk blurted, "So hyung, I talked with my parents a month ago, and they still don't believe I'm bipolar because they saw how stable I was. Like—for real? So I tried not to feel it but in the end, it really upset me enough that it triggered my mania, so I hooked up with a dude for a bit. Then when I asked for better boundaries, that guy ghosted me, and I just—I don't like the uncertainty of unfinished business. I wish he could've just rejected me point blank instead of telling me sweet stuff before going away unexpectedly. I really hate that. Because had he rejected me straightforwardly—lol—I'd have managed better. I wouldn't have felt so anxious with the uncertainty to the point I got triggered into another manic episode. Like. I don't know. I did my best to be clear about what I want, and he said he was interested in something more, so I was, like, okay, since I just wanted to try if I could do something like that, but after I gave those boundaries when I explained that I'm bipolar, he just sped off! Like wow, asshole. So goddamn, I don't know. I know there's a lot of stigma, but it's not like I don't actively try to be stable and committed! So because of all these things, I felt like a mess, and yeah, well, here we are: 3 days of shit sleep and today. So there, sigh."
For some reason, the mention of a hookup made Jimin's heart twist unpleasantly, but he ignored it because he really couldn't believe that Jeongguk's parents still dismissed the younger's diagnosis. It may have been only three years ago, but wasn't that enough time to see the reality of the situation? And to see how hard it was for Jeongguk? Then again, that's part of why the two moved out, anyway. And ahh, whoever that dude was, he's really lucky Jimin wasn't around when it happened.
He released a breath he didn't know he was holding until Jeongguk gently patted his knee, murmuring, "I'll get the ice cream now, hyung."
"That was really shitty, Ggukkie," Jimin huffed, stuffing his face with the fish bread ice cream.
Jeongguk nodded. "It stung a lot, not gonna lie. Both parts. Like, I wanted to scream to my parents something like, 'If I'm not bipolar, why did the meds work?' Like the shit they say, seriously. And that dude. I really shouldn't have done that, but I just went through it because I grew numb from what my parents told me, but in the end, I hurt myself more in the process. So it was mostly them, but I also had my part. I just wish... Sigh. I've grown better at it, but impulse control is no joke."
Jimin patted his head. "You did your best, you know? And the meds may help, but it's not something that's easily managed. It takes years. And yours is still fresh. So I know it's hard, but give yourself a break, yeah? Actually, well, I'm here to remind you of that, so I'm really glad you called me for a sleepover. I missed you something fierce too, my cute and strong baby."
Jeongguk blushed, hands cupping his ears from getting flustered, but his bunny-cheek grin appeared, so Jimin took that as a win.
"I missed you too, hyungie. I think if you were here, I'd have dealt better, but I tried, I guess," Jeongguk shrugged, taking a large bite off his ice cream, licking some of the spill before it got on his finger.
The sight was a little distracting, but Jimin blinked it away, directing his eyes on the screen as the film ended.
"Oh yeah, how'd the show go, by the way?" Jeongguk asked, doe eyes focused on him.
Jimin raised a brow, then realised what he meant. "It was okay. Really busy. Didn't really have a break. I was able to get some shots of the city and had only enough time to buy souvenirs on a weekend—I got you a cute hoodie, by the way—but ugh. I had to do three nights consecutively because one of the leads got a sprained ankle, so it wasn't that fun. It's okay, though, since I got a bonus. There were also no aftershow pictorials with the audience so it sucked, but in the end, it was for the better. And if things go well with the books, then we might go there again, but this time for a better concept."
"Oh, what concept?"
"I think you'll like it—it's a contemporary version of Antigoné . For our times. But things are still being set up, and I'm also gonna make some of the choreo so I'm really excited too," he says with a pleased smile, eyeing Jeongguk.
The younger claps at him with the same energy, and edges closer to him with a big smile, "I'm looking forward to it, hyung! I really love how you dance. Like, you literally make it hard to breathe when I watch you, you're so cool! Please, please, please give me front-row tickets so I can hustle people, and we can all make people do a standing ovation for you, please!"
Jimin laughs, endeared by Jeongguk's antics, but he already knows he'll be giving the younger those tickets because that's what he usually does, and he really does look forward to seeing Jeongguk's face once the show ends. It was always a beautiful and encouraging sight—like, no matter what problem there was that occurred in the show, as long as he saw his dongsaeng's smiling face, he'd forget about it and just feel really invigorated, so he's also really excited to start working on the show and make Jeongguk smile.
"Ah, Ggukkie, you're so precious, but of course, you'll be the first to receive tickets," he said, tapping the younger's chin fondly. "Do you want to play some games or do you want to marathon the Director's Cut of LOTR?"
"Yes," Jeongguk gave him the biggest smile, eyes nearly turning into crescents.
Jimin swallowed, cheeks flushing.
So he cups the younger's cheeks, returning his smile. "As you wish."
"You really had to quote Princess Bride, huh, hyungie?" Jeongguk asked, resting his head on Jimin's shoulder. "I love you, too."
Over the years, the way they said I love you confused a lot of people because while it started as a joke between them, it evolved as they grew. As kids, it was just that, a platonic intention. As teens, it was much the same, but spoken rarely because they were going through puberty, so it felt awkward sometimes. So it was either a joke when they were around other people or only said when they comforted each other during a really sad time. And these days, it's deepened into something else, not unknown but tangible and delicately held. He thinks they haven't acted on it because they're too comfortable with their dynamic right now, and it's just difficult, especially since they're still navigating the ugly reality of adulthood and managing their respective personal issues.
Because if Jimin were being truly honest with himself, none of his relationships lasted because he only felt the happiest with Jeongguk. Really, it was his most fulfilling relationship, so the other partners he had, while he did try to work them out, none of them made him feel like he was really allowed to be as vulnerable as he did with Jeongguk. So this pact they made years ago, it's the one thing he'd fight for to keep because Jeongguk was the most important person in his life.
And he loves him, in more ways than one.
"By the way, would you be able to take some time off work to rest?" Jimin asks Jeongguk hours later, once they've started The Two Towers.
"Oh! Not yet. Let me email Seokjin-hyung quickly," the younger pouts, lower lip jutting out as he types the message on his phone. "I blocked Monday and Tuesday since I don't have meetings until Wednesday, and I'm already resting today and tomorrow, so it should be fine. I don't want to file more leaves because I get bored easily, so those two extra days work for me. But you don't need to do the same, yeah? You're already here with me for a fortnight so I'll be okay, really."
Jimin pats his head with a smile. "To be honest, my day off got changed from Saturday to Monday for this week, so I should be able to hangout with you extra on that day. Do you want to go somewhere?"
"Hmm. I want to go to a beach, but I'm still undecided. Do you have other ideas?" the younger murmured, sipping some banana milk after popping some cheese balls in his mouth.
"Well, Busan's about 3-4 hours away. We can take the train and go to Gwangalli and picnic at night, if you like. Or Dadaepo since it's much the same, but quieter there," Jimin says, scanning his phone while playing with the ends of Jeongguk's hair. "Unless you just want to cuddle and do nothing. Either way is fun."
"I think cuddling with a view and you will be more fun," Jeongguk says with a smirk, wagging his eyebrows.
Jimin rolls his eyes, fighting the blush spreading across his cheeks. "You want my cuddles that bad, huh?"
Jeongguk pouts. "You were away for a month! I was deprived of your hugs, hmph!"
Gosh.
The things Jeongguk says sometimes.
Things that make Jimin want to kiss him senseless.
But it wasn't a good time right now, vulnerable as his dongsaeng was, so he just pinched Jeongguk's cheek, endeared by the cuteness of his admission.
"So, if we go tomorrow afternoon, we can get there in the evening and enjoy the quiet. Is it Gwangalli or Dadaepo, then?"
"Dadaepo! I kinda miss the fountain show. I'll pay for everything, though, since I requested the pact this time," Jeongguk says firmly.
Jimin shakes his head, opening tabs for train tickets and hotels in the area. "Nope, hyung will do it for you."
"But hyung, I want to. Plus it won't be fair to you. You're already taking care of me, so the least I could do is handle the logistics and finances," Jeongguk whined, his lisp showing a little.
"It doesn't bother me, Ggukkie."
"I mind!"
"Nope."
Jeongguk gives him his best doe-eye look, even jutting his lower lip out for maximum effect.
Jimin inhales.
It didn't matter that Jeongguk decided to sit on his lap, it was still a no. He could handle it fine. They've done that plenty of times, so no. Inching towards his face? Ha! Fool's play. Still. A BIG, resounding NO.
Until Jeongguk leaned in, dark eyes a little too intense at Jimin, caging him on the couch.
Jimin's mouth went dry, so he wet it a little, not expecting the younger to follow it, but fuck, he did, and he got stuck there for a bit—eyes drooping into a confused daze—before leaning in some more, near enough to kiss, but before they could, Jeongguk turns his head to the side over the edge of Jimin's lips and closes his eyes as he murmurs, "Please."
Jimin dropped his phone on the couch.
He lost.
"Okay," he rasps, because holy shit.
It was a good thing he lost his grip on the phone because he suddenly remembered that Jeongguk was still in the throes of his mania, so his best friend may have been acting out on that impulse. So he laughs it out and holds his feelings in, even as Jeongguk kisses his cheek soundly at his approval, because he almost lost control.
He takes a deep breath, eyeing the younger beside him as he excitedly makes the bookings and forwards all the confirmation to him.
"All good, then?"
"Yep! We gotta pack stuff then, hyung!"
"All right," he says, never mind that he still feels a little winded from that interaction. But it's not a good time, and Jeongguk needs him to be the steadier one right now, so he distracts himself with the preparation and continuation of the LOTR marathon before falling asleep on the couch.
The next day, he was woken up with the smell of suyuk and kimchi fried rice around 11 AM. Then they set out to leave Jeongguk's place after a quick run-through of the things they brought with them before making sure to bolt the apartment properly and leaving a message to the landlord about their plans. They got to the station around 2 PM, unbothered by the leisurely pace they set about. They fell asleep again once they slumped to their seats, and hours later, they arrived at the last station.
Once they got to their lodgings for the night, the two set their satchels in the room and got their smaller bags with them so they could explore more easily. They did go to a convenience store to buy some food and drinks first before heading to the beach and renting an umbrella with two beach chairs to lay on.
They ate their meals quietly, admiring the sun setting in the horizon. It was really pretty, the soft yellow blending into the purple until it gradually deepened to the night. It reminded him a little of Jeongguk, those two colours being his favourites, so he snuck a glance at the other.
The younger was zoned out, eyes a little hazy as he quietly watched the view. Then he blinked and glanced back at Jimin, probably feeling his eyes on him. Jeongguk smiled at him softly. "Thank you for being with me here, hyung. I really appreciate it a lot. I feel calmer now."
Jimin returned his smile, opening his arms. Jeongguk eagerly leapt at the opportunity and settled in between his legs, tucking his face against the slope of his neck before wrapping his arms around his waist. The elder adjusted accordingly, cushioning his dongsaeng's back with an arm while his other hand caressed his hair. They closed their eyes together and breathed slowly, slightly shivering from the coldness of the night.
"Not gonna lie, I could sleep here," Jeongguk murmured. "But I don't want to extend a free RSVP to mosquitoes."
Jimin nodded against his head. "Me too."
"By the way, hyung, I forgot to say—but is there something I can do for you for the duration of the pact?"
"I think you've done plenty, baby. There's no need to worry about anything else. You already paid for this trip, yeah? You also helped me out before when I lost the lead part sometime ago. It's okay. If anything, I just hope you'd feel better and less alone, after everything that happened."
Jeongguk looks up at him with a smile. "You're really the best, hyung."
"It's also because I have the best person with me right here. I wonder who it is, hmm?"
Jeongguk laughs.
"You're so funny, hyung. But I guess that makes up for your small height, face, and fingers. All are very cute, I assure you," Jeongguk teases.
Jimin snorts, squeezing his waist. "You're very lucky that I love you."
Jeongguk scrunches his nose at him before his face grows serious.
"You know, hyung. That dude. Um. Lemme just get some more of my thoughts out. I think it hurt a bit because I deluded myself into thinking it'd be okay. Because… well, I bottomed. So I felt really vulnerable. And he kinda broke that trust. So it made me cry. Because I felt a little used. Like, I'm used to topping, you know? And I've been curious about bottoming for a while now, so when I got manic, I just seized the chance to do it. And it was okay at first, but when he got into it, he went too rough even after I asked him to be gentler since it was my first time, and right after that, that was when I explained that I was bipolar and asked for better boundaries. He said it doesn't change anything, but after a while, he just blocked me and left me hanging. So I didn't feel assured because of the uncertainty that his ghosting gave me. And I wish... people understand that it's not like I asked to be bipolar? It sucks. Sometimes, I wish I didn't have it. Other times, I think no because it gives me clearer insight into my emotions and other people's, but sometimes it can just be exhausting. Exhausting enough to bore me."
"So yeah, um, anyway, back to the ugly feeling that followed his ghosting, it triggered another manic episode because I felt so worthless. I know that's not true, but given the anxiety I already deal with this disorder, having my parents' denial and this ghosting really flipped it on, you know? And I'm just. Hyung, why? I try to be stable. I do my best to be committed. I try my best to be accommodating. I get that I can be really intense even when I'm stable, and I know it's not for everyone, and that it can be a lot, but why? Is it so bad to be bipolar? I know there's a lot of stigma, and while those are real, it does not involve all of us with bipolar, you know? And I know I don't present as extreme as some of the cases, but that's because I present it differently and really do my work! I know I'm repeating myself, but it's just fucking unfair, hyung," Jeongguk sighed, tears steadily falling from his eyes.
Jimin tried not to show it, but he couldn't help it. He also cried. It hurt a lot to see Jeongguk in so much pain like this, so he hugged him tighter. Because he knows how empty and lonely it can be, to be mocked so harshly just for being who you are. The pain never fades, it's always there, ready to bring up walls the moment you get hurt.
"Oh, Jeonggukie, my baby," he murmured, kissing the top of his head as he felt his dongsaeng cry harder against his shoulder.
Gently brushing the younger's hair, Jimin then cups his cheek.
"I want you to know that there's nothing wrong with who you are. Literally nothing. Being bipolar is just one aspect of you, but it's not all that you are. The good and the bad. All of you—none of it makes me see and think of you as anything less. You have had weak moments, yes, but my baby, you have always been strong. You do your best and you know how and when to ask for help. Not everyone can admit to it, you know? Don't forget. And you've been really hurt, so just let it flow, repeat it until it no longer hurts as bad as it did, it's okay," Jimin murmured, wiping his dongsaeng's tears.
"And you're here. You are safe. And dearly loved," he kisses Jeongguk's eyelids as it fell, "And I love you."
Then Jeongguk held his hand against his cheek and opened his eyes, staring at him with all the love and sincerity in the world.
If Jimin had any doubts whether or not he really loved Jeongguk in more ways than one, it was gone. Because it was right here, right in front of him, tangible and pulling him closer with an invisible string.
But—not right now.
He cannot act on his feelings just yet. Jeongguk was in a really vulnerable space, so he just hugged him closer to him and hid his face against the waves of his dark hair. Just like this, it was enough. As long as he could be with Jeongguk for a long, long time, it's enough. What matters is that Jeongguk doesn't feel alone anymore.
"I'm really glad I have you in my life, hyung. You are very dear to me," Jeongguk said after a while.
Jimin scoffed, trying to lighten the mood. "I'm the dearest, and you know it."
"Your lips really look like a chicken gizzard's," Jeongguk playfully pokes his pout with a laugh. "But of course, hyung. You're my one and only, just like I'm yours."
Jimin's certain his cheeks were heating up, but he laughs along and stands up. "Let's catch the fountain lights, then?"
When his dongsaeng nods, Jimin takes his hand as they stand up and smiles at the other as Jeongguk intertwines their fingers. Right now, he's not concerned by the depths his feelings want to take this gesture to. He's just happy that Jeongguk is not afraid to reach out, especially after how vulnerable he felt.
When they were younger and still figuring out how to manage their emotions properly, there was a turbulent period in their friendship wherein they wouldn't speak to each other for a while after talking about the things that really depressed them. It lasts for a while, but eventually, they spend time with each other again. So for his dongsaeng to bare his heart like that but still take his hand really showed Jimin how wiser and stronger the younger has become. And it's one of the many reasons he stopped wondering why he fell for the other. Vulnerability was not an easy feat at all. Even he struggles with it a lot.
So he doesn't let go, not as they watch the fountain light show and he gets mesmerised by the sparkle in Jeongguk's eyes as he gapes at the lights with childlike wonder. Not as they walked along the shoreline and pointed out all the constellations they could pick out. Not even as they went back to their hotel and Jeongguk asked to spoon him this time, especially when he saw him shiver from the cold. So they held each other close, until sleep claimed them, and they woke up with soft smiles at each other.
When Tuesday came, Jimin was a little hesitant to part with Jeongguk because after their short trip, his dongsaeng became really sullen and low. It was hard to get him out of bed and the most he would do was to eat his meals and take his medicine. But apart from that, he was mostly sleeping or just staring blankly while they watched more films. He also canceled his game stream, but Jimin was honestly fine with that since Jeongguk was really out of it.
It's not that he hasn't seen this before, really. He's had three years to see Jeongguk go through with it, but it's not like it hurt less to see him this way. He did what he could to make it easier for the younger where he could—helped give him a sponge bath and brushed his teeth when he felt really out of it and cuddled him as much as he could. But when Jeongguk wanted some alone time, he stayed in the living room and cleaned around his place as quietly as he could since they'd compromised that he'd keep his bedroom door open in case he needed help with anything.
So today, well. They've done it before, and they're both used to it, but it still sucked a little.
He made sure to prepare stuff the younger can just microwave or eat as it is so that was sorted, at least. So before tying his shoes, he knocked on his dongsaeng's door and entered the room. Jeongguk woke up slowly, rubbing his eyes with the paws of his sleeves as Jimin sat on the side of the bed.
"Baby, I'm gonna head to the studio now, mm? I've left you meals at the table and little notes for you to check your phone in case you forgot to take your pills. Is it okay for us to text once in a while since I'm away for most of the day?" he asked, brushing Jeongguk's hair as he spoke.
Jeongguk nodded against his hand before opening his eyes. "Hug?"
Jimin smiled at him and gathered the younger in his arms, squeezing as hard as he could. Jeongguk nosed the slope of his neck until he reached his cheek and gave a small kiss.
He shivered.
"Home soon, please," the younger murmured before drifting off to sleep once again.
Sometimes, Jimin wished he didn't have to be a contributing member to society to fulfill everything his heart desired, needs in tow, but that was a reality too far for them to see right now, and as much as he wanted to just escape the world of adulthood and hug Jeongguk forever, he had to go. So he gave the younger a kiss on top of his forehead and forced his feet to go out of the door and do what he needed to do.
When lunch came, he sent a selfie of him, sweaty and tired as fuck while eating on the dance floor, to check in with Jeongguk. Luckily, his dongsaeng was up and sent a video of him eating the chicken soup he had prepared with music playing in the background. He smiled at the video and sent him a text.
🌟🐥
like the soup?
🦾🐰
's good
🌟🐥
there's some seaweed flakes in the fridge too
🦾🐰
😮
🌟🐥
🤗
🦾🐰
ilysmsm
🌟🐥
don't forget your pills too. lyt gtg
He smiles at the exchange for a bit until he gets called by Hoseok to check the blocking before they start practising again. When he reached the older man, he raised a brow at the smirk the other had.
"Is it your baby, I wonder?"
"Hyung, please not now. He's not okay," Jimin pouted as he gestures for one of their members to move closer to their partner.
Hoseok laughs, patting his head. "Okay, okay, I get it. I'll have Taehyung do the cleaning at the end since you've covered for him last week. We're not close to the show, so it's okay to be a little relaxed. And I just know you'll try to win us all with your pout so you can go home earlier than usual."
Jimin whines at the older man but thanks him in the end. "You want my landlord's number, huh?"
The older man blushed, clearing his throat. "Well, I've got eyes. Dude's prettier than fine porcelain, you know?"
"Whoa, Hobi-hyung, please keep it PG, there are kids here," Jimin teased, earning him an eye roll from the other. "Also, I don't know about porcelain. Maybe a cat? But you like those, so, ahem, okay, you'll have that number."
Hobi just gave him a teasing glare before going back to pro mode. "All right, you guys! I still see a lot of people are not getting their expressions tight! You can't just be all technique here! Give it more attitude than Squidward, goddamn! Or I swear I'll have you all do an Opposite without notice!"
In their company, an Opposite is basically a made up routine they did where people crossed genres they weren't particularly well-versed in. Say, for example, Taehyung who was good at house dance would be asked to switch to contemporary dance while he would be asked to do hip hop. Usually, they did this to make sure everyone in the company was well-rounded enough to fill in for anyone else in case someone couldn't perform due to emergencies, but other times, they just fool around during practice but give at least 15 minutes ahead to set a routine. But yeah, some days, if people were finding something hard, Hoseok would usually employ it to bring out the energy the dancers need to portray for the show. It can be exhausting at times, but it's a really good mental and physical challenge for all of them.
Jimin got subject to it once when he was still new since he kept messing up, but he had a lot of fun. Then again, his goal today is to go home as soon as possible, so he made sure to focus and help Hoseok where he could in managing the dancers and rounding out their performance. And that's where he put all his energy into as the hours blurred, and he managed to get back to Jeongguk.
When he got there, he wasn't really sure what he was expecting, but it was not Jeongguk fiercely exercising in the middle of the living room. He even set aside the table and was on his third set of doing overhead press with weights. His dongsaeng was sweating profusely, eyes concentrated on the screen as it counted down from three, two, one before it switched to him. Then he smiled widely, setting the weights aside before wiping his forehead with a towel.
Jimin made sure his eyes were focused on the other's and not his sweat clad chest. Because. Cough. Because he was topless. Again. And he was shining like fuck. Like, he's not going to blame the gay gods for sculpting Jeongguk like this, especially with his full sleeve tattoo, but he really has to pause and take a deep breath. His dongsaeng was simply so stunning he's just caught breathless at times.
So as not to keep staring too longingly for too long, Jimin quickly looks for a glass of water and gives it to Jeongguk.
"How was the studio today, hyung?" the younger asked, drinking the water he gave in between short gulps.
"The normal craze. Right at the end, when someone messed up, we all got saved from doing an Opposite, thanks to Yoongi-hyung texting Hobi-hyung about a date," Jimin shrugged, patting his dongsaeng's cheeks with the towel hanging over his shoulders just to do something. "I gave it to Hobi-hyung a while after lunch and well, the dude moves quickly. Just like Yoongi-hyung. So yeah, all good."
Jeongguk laughed at his tale. "I'm not surprised at all."
Jimin hummed his agreement. "What got you out of bed today, baby? Not that I'm not glad because I am, but may I please know?"
"Well, um," Jeongguk pouts, rubbing his hands in front of him, "After lunch, I napped a little and then when I woke up, I forgot you were out for work, so I got a little sad. But then I realised… it's not like I should put all the burden of my sadness on your absence because that was unfair to you, so I don't know."
Then he gestured to a white board set on top of his dinner table's side counter that Jimin only noticed now.
"I looked around my room and saw this diagram I made before with my psychiatrist," he explained, taking the board so Jimin could see what was written more clearly. It was a decision tool filled with lots of notes and some cute scribbles Jeongguk made. "Well, a few months ago, we had this session about healthy coping mechanisms because I was having a difficult time, giving myself a lot of negative self talk and being risky. So Doc Joon said, 'Why not make a list of the things you like to do when you're down so you remember that you have other options?' And yeah, that's what I did. I wrote down exercise here if I was sad. And that if that didn't work, then I should try another activity like dancing or camping. If that didn't work I should try singing and whatnot. Our 'pact' is here as well, but I put it under Emergency so that I know that I've really hit a different kind of low. And that's where we're at."
Then he placed his chin on top of the board and glanced at Jimin.
"So I went back to 'exercise' because I went back to being really sad. I thought some more about why that was, and maybe it's because I missed the fun and carefree time we had in Dadaepo, but it's not like we can't do that again, yeah? So. It's just that I was trying so hard not to feel the void it left me once it was over. And of course, I missed you, too. But yeah. I can't always rely on you as much as I know you'll care for me... but you know what I mean. Some days, it's easier. Some days, not so. You know how hard it is to be bipolar. I have to keep asking these questions and really be aware because it's the only way I can trust myself. So, um. Yeah, there. And thank you, hyung. For being here again."
When Jeongguk finished, he felt a little teary. Because his dongsaeng really tries his best. So he opened his arms, and the younger grinned shyly as he entered his embrace.
"You work so hard, Ggukkie, I'm so fucking proud of you," Jimin whispered, hugging the other more tightly. "I'm so thankful you're here with me. You have no idea. I love you so much."
Jeongguk chuckled against him, slowly wrapping his arms around Jimin's waist. "You know I love you too, hyung. And your chicken soup really did me wonders. So thank you for that too. Are you hungry, though? There's not much left of it, but I can make you bulguri then add eggs and maybe some beef."
His stomach growled before he could answer.
The younger laughed, poking his stomach.
He groaned, hiding his face in Jeongguk's chest out of embarrassment.
"It's okay, hyung. I'm also hungry."
"Fine, then I'm gonna shower first. 'Cause I'm really worn out," Jimin said, heading to his room to get his clothes.
Not long after, they share the meal and play Assassin's Creed: Brotherhood, taking turns when the other dies. They spent most of the night like that, roasting each other over failures and sharing how they'd rather that Ubisoft have continued with a more fleshed out storyline for Desmond rather than killing him just because some fans couldn't handle not playing as Ezio. And it was when Jimin was switching the game to the next installment that Jeongguk passed out beside him, head on his shoulder. He took him to his bed, hugging his best friend from behind and followed soon after.
The week after, Jeongguk's appointment came while he was at work, so as usual, he did his best to come home as early as he could to check on his dongsaeng. At least, not before getting him a bunny plushie just in case it was difficult for his best friend.
Jeongguk doesn't have a lot of plushies, so he thought it might be something his best friend would like, too. And he bought a cute bunny plushie because it reminded him of how the younger smiles, pink cheeks pulling up as his overbite juts out a little, making him look just so fucking adorable. He loves it a lot, really.
Ahem.
"Jiminie-hyung!" his best friend greets him with his widest smile yet, immediately squeezing the bunny plushie as he receives it before kissing his cheek soundly. "It's so cute, ugh, thank you!"
Jimin can't help his lovestruck smile. "You're welcome, baby."
His best friend glanced at him with flushed cheeks, then squeezed the bunny again before taking his hand and leading them towards the couch. Jeongguk plops the plush toy beside him as Jimin sits down and navigates the rolling table for the meal the younger has prepared for the both of them to eat. Once they finished eating, his dongsaeng pats his knee to open. He complies, welcoming Jeongguk's weight on his lap with a supporting hand on his back. The younger hides in his neck and breathes deeply, so Jimin draws small circles on top of his knees. After a while, his best friend peeks out at him and tugs on the collar of his shirt.
"What's up, Ggukkie?" Jimin asks, maneuvering him around a little to get the plushie behind him for his best friend to hold onto.
"So, my doc increased my dosage and gave me something to help with the depression too. We're gonna see if that combo works out, and I'll have to do blood work for my liver soon as well," Jeongguk starts, pressing on the bunny's ears.
Jimin nods for his best friend to continue. This was routine, after all.
"Then we talked about how deeply my parents' denial of my diagnosis broke me. Then it got worse even more with the hookup ghosting me. So, it took a while, much more than when I spoke with you about how the hurt from those events increased my feelings of worthlessness, which you know, fed into my blinding self-hatred," Jeongguk continued, voice hitching a little as he kept his tears at bay and he starts talking more quickly. "Because as you know, mania is really just that. Blinding self-hatred disguised by an artificial glamour of euphoria. Because that's what people like to see. That's what the media always shows. All fun and bullshit. Because we don't really need to drink or do weed since we're literally high 24/7. Partaking in those things just makes us think we can numb the pain even further. That's why the spiral of the aftermath is so fucking ugly and not everyone can deal with it. And since people don't like that, we keep masking, risking, and performing. Since that's the version they like. So meeting the other side is just so unsettling. Like, I get it, the illusion is gone. Who the fuck wants that? But yeah, that's how Doc Joon broke it down to me after I told him what you and I spoke of last time."
Then Jeongguk cried, but he tried to stop them, angrily tossing them to the side with his head only for more to come and his breaths to become ragged until he started panting and sobbing.
"It's okay, baby," Jimin rubbed the younger's chest in slow circles until Jeongguk took slow, deep breaths and just cried softly on his shoulder. His heartbeat was still erratic, but for the most part, it had started to slow down so he kissed the younger's hair. "Could you take another deep breath for me, please?"
His dongsaeng closed his eyes and squeezed the plushie as he obeyed, inhaling through his nose and then exhaling loudly through his mouth. Once he had fully settled down, he wiped his cheeks and set aside the plush to wound his arms around the older's neck.
Jimin let his lids fall, caressing his best friend's back as they hugged each other with Jeongguk's legs around his waist, fully sitting on his lap.
"Baby?" he murmured near Jeongguk's ear after a while, checking to see whether the younger has fallen asleep or not.
Jeongguk rubbed his cheek against the older's. "'M awake. It's just so nice to be held like this."
"Okay," Jimin smiled against the younger's cheek, heart growing fonder for his best friend.
Then Jeongguk spoke up again as he played with Jimin's hair at the nape.
"Then we talked about relationships. Like how I cannot really do casual because I always get emotionally invested, which is true. Then he asked me what I sought for with that hookup. Was it a dopamine hit or a genuine longing for a relationship? I said when it started, it was more of the first but when there was a chance for the latter—it's that I've been really wanting one. So he then asked, 'So if we try to detach your needs from the person, does it hurt a little less, especially if—theoretically speaking—there was someone else that came along and gave you exactly what you needed'?"
Jeongguk sat up at that, looking at Jimin with a huge grin. "My god, hyung. When he said that, all my sadness about that dude went away. It was like. Poof! Like that person didn't really matter. Of course it hurt a bit, but once my doc asked me that, it's like the heavy fog got lifted away. Because wow, that person really didn't mean that much to me. At all! And it helped me feel a little better and think better of what happened then. It was a lesson, I guess."
Jimin wrapped his arms tighter around his dongsaeng's waist, letting Jeongguk's head rest on top of his.
"That's good to know," he whispered, smiling up at him. "Because you really deserve better, Ggukkie."
Nodding, his best friend fidgeted with the collar of his shirt again. "Then he advised me that if I really want a relationship... I should make sure to keep my mania in check. To stay medicated, be more aware of my triggers, and keep nurturing healthier coping habits. And to look at three things to determine whether or not a partner would be good for me."
Jimin hummed, grinning. "Lemme guess: chemistry, compatibility, commitment. We've talked about it before."
They discussed it at length before because when Jeongguk first got the diagnosis, there was a period where his best friend started to doubt everything about himself—his identity, his feelings, his decisions.
For a long time, his dongsaeng felt like he couldn't trust himself. Because if all his actions were affected by being bipolar, then who would've he been without it? So Jeongguk mourned it for a while before eventually coming to the realisation that it didn't really matter as much in the grand scheme of things.
He was still Jeongguk.
But the one part he struggled the most was distinguishing if his feelings for someone were a manic hyperfixation or genuine affection. After all, they read that some people with the diagnosis can sometimes experience a different preference and orientation when under the influence of mania. The latter grew easier to define as his best friend has consistently shown interest towards men and women. The former was harder because unless Jeongguk actively stayed stable and self-aware of his actions, he'd subconsciously mirror other people's behaviour towards him to mask his discomfort or hesitance to show vulnerability.
It was a difficult time for both of them too because two years ago, they almost broke up as friends until Jimin realised that Jeongguk became manic due to the stress of his old soul-sucking job. At the time, his best friend was overspending and only made ends meet. So he stopped medicating and didn't sleep properly for nearly a month until Jimin visited him in his place with the intention of having a final talk with Jeongguk.
His heart broke when he saw how depressed his dongsaeng was—his house was a mess, cup noodles and pizza boxes were strewn around, dirty laundry forgotten everywhere, and dishes were just—basically, Jimin woke up to the reality Jeongguk was facing. So he took his best friend to his place, cleaned him up because he hasn't been taking care of himself, and ordered professional cleaning service for the younger's place. Then he drove them both to a ward where Jeongguk stayed for two weeks to recover. When he got out, they cried as they held onto each other for a long time.
That was when Jimin knew he couldn't give up on Jeongguk. Because the reason for their fight was about Jeongguk not being able to go to him when he requested for the pact after a horrible breakup. Jimin was in a mess, and Jeongguk wasn't communicating properly because he was already deep into the haze of his depression, so petty fights grew because they were not able to provide the care and understanding each other needed at the time. So when things came to light and they left the hospital, they talked it out and smoothed things over with cup noodles and soda in the river banks at night. Then they went home to Jimin's place and hugged each other to sleep.
Thinking about it now, they got really lucky with each other. Most friendships would've died by then.
He hugged Jeongguk a little more possessively at the thought. He heard his best friend hum at the action.
"—so Doc told me to keep those in mind once I get attracted to someone," his best friend continued over his thoughts, eyes low and fingers tightly holding onto Jimin's shirt. "Like yeah, mutual attraction is good, but if they don't want the same things as me and quit on me at different stages of my diagnosis, then they aren't worth shit. So basically, he told me that a partner should've seen me or can at least manage and adapt to my baseline stability, depressive episodes, and manic phases. Which tracks to what we read and talked about before."
Jimin nods, brushing the younger's hair. "That's right. And how do you feel now?"
Jeongguk glanced at him, so he arched a brow, and they held the stare for so long until they eventually smiled at each other. The younger let his eyes fall first as he adjusts himself closer to Jimin's lap, basically sitting on top of his crotch, so he doesn't move and controls his breathing, making sure to relax.
"Right now, there's still a mess in my head, but one thing remains clear," Jeongguk murmurs with a soft smile, looking at Jimin again.
His best friend's eyes were gentle as he spoke. "Thank you for being with me. After all this time. I've said it many times, but I really mean each one. And I'd rather you not doubt the significance of what you do for me, but also the importance you truly have in my life. I love you, hyung. I really do."
Jimin held his face delicately. "I know. I love you a lot too, baby."
Jeongguk bit his lip at that.
He frowned in concern, squishing the younger's cheeks. "What troubles you?"
Jeongguk held onto his hands. "Promise you'll hear me out first? And if ever you find it weird, just know that it never happened."
"My baby, I'll always hear you out, you know that," Jimin eyed the other seriously.
"See, the thing is—when Doc Joon spoke of a hypothetical person in our session, my mind instantly went to you," Jeongguk murmured, eyes beginning to well up. "I thought of you. Immediately. And all the pain went away. All that was left was just the calm, a little similar to when I reach baseline. Except I don't get bored. I feel more alive, but conscious and fully in control. Because you've seen me. And you never ran away. My parents didn't really listen to me, especially when this diagnosis came out. But you did. And I never doubted for a second that you didn't love me as I am."
Then the younger's lips trembled as more tears fell.
"I think—all the people before, I kept comparing them to you subconsciously. They don't hug me with all the love in the world like you do. Their kisses weren't as remarkable as yours were, even if you never kissed my lips. But when my mind would wander, I'd remember how softly you'd kiss my forehead. Even more than theirs. And when you say you love me, it feels just right. And it sounds right. And I think, hyung—it's not because you're convenient or what because that's not it. I think—I've been looking at the wrong places for the love that was just in front of me the whole damn time. Because I kept hesitating and I've hurt you before too. But mostly because I was blindsided."
"Blindsided," Jeongguk whispered as he drew nearer to him, eyes drooping low, "by how much I love you, in more ways than one."
Jimin's mouth parted in surprise, heart pounding like crazy. Because these were literally the same thoughts he was having over the years—why he thought he couldn't act on his feelings. But right now, the words he wanted to say to his best friend, all of it, were being said back to him.
"I cannot promise I won't hurt you again, but I will do my best to be a person worthy of standing beside you," Jeongguk said. "Because I want to walk with you. In the same direction, even if we fight or even if we have different choices. If you'll let me."
Jimin tears up.
"My baby, you are literally the best person I know," he murmurs as he wipes his best friend's cheeks with the fondest smile, letting their foreheads rest on top of each other's. "You do not have to worry about being worthy. You have always been, even without me. So please don't think that. Because would you think that of me?"
Jeongguk shook his head ferociously, rubbing their noses together in the process, and they both chuckled before going silent for a bit. Jimin takes that time to kiss the younger's cheeks and eyelids as it closed.
Jeongguk's mouth parted with an affected sigh.
"You and I, we're just doing our best. We make mistakes. But we always try again, right?" Jimin murmured, mouth nearing his best friend's, "So it's not far off to think that I'm also really, really in love with you, in more ways than one."
He felt more than saw Jeongguk shiver at the words.
"Hyung," the younger lisped, eyes opening to focus on his mouth. "Wanna kiss you. May I?"
"Well, I'm yours, right?" Jimin smirks, watching his best friend blush at the words and clutch his shoulder.
"Okay," Jeongguk smiles, pressing a soft kiss on his mouth.
He returns it sweetly, holding the younger's face, tugging on his lower lip as he moves back and sees Jeongguk's dazed face, kiss-wrecked.
"Fuck."
Jimin probably looks calm to his best friend, but that couldn't be further from the truth. His heart has started to accelerate with just that one touch, and if only he'd known it would take only one kiss to feel this electric, he'd have tugged Jeongguk to him much earlier.
Because after that soft curse, they literally melt into each other, closed-mouth kisses deepening as they panted into each other's mouth. Jimin seizes that opportunity to lick his best friend's lower lip and languidly slide their tongues together—Jeongguk moans louder at that, kissing him back with the same ferocity as he holds onto Jimin's hair.
"Jimin-ah," his dongsaeng pants once he starts to press kisses and suck a mark on the slope of Jeongguk's neck.
Jimin noses at the area while his other hand caresses the skin of the younger's lower back, his sweater having ridden up a little in the tangle of their kiss.
"Yes, baby?" he asks, eyes a little hazy from the kiss as he stares at the other in question.
"I want to—I want," Jeongguk starts before a long, high whine escapes past his lips when Jimin playfully pinches his left nipple. His best friend bites his lower lip as the older licks his ear. "I feel too hot. And I wanna have sex with you, but maybe it's too fast?"
Jimin nods, closing his eyes as he rests his forehead on the younger's chest and just hugs him, taking a deep breath.
"That's right. Let's take it slow."
"Yes, but," Jeongguk says, placing Jimin's hands on his butt firmly. "Maybe we can just grind on each other? And kiss some more?"
"Of course, I like that you say these things, so please always do, mm?" Jimin replies with a smile, kneading the other's butt a little as Jeongguk starts to grind on him.
Their kisses start to grow heavier when Jimin flips Jeongguk to lay on the couch and the younger cradles his legs on the older's waist, making their clothed hardons rub against each other hotly. Then Jeongguk sucks on his neck as he grinds up at him, making Jimin growl under his breath.
"You feel so big, too, hyung," his dongsaeng mutters as Jimin grinds into him deeply, making Jeongguk's weight impress on the couch. "Fuck."
"Why, wanna feel it inside you, Jeongguk-ah?" he asks, breath ragged from arousal.
His best friend moans against his ear, holding onto Jimin's shirt. "Fuck, hyung. Yeah."
Jimin chuckles at that, kissing the side of his head. "Next time, baby. We promised slow."
Jeongguk whines, but moves his hips faster to burn the frustration off. So Jimin matches that pace until the younger bites his lips and his legs start to shiver, nearing his climax.
Jimin presses a thumb to his best friend's mouth, voice low, "Jeongguk-ah, don't keep it in. I wanna hear you."
"Fuck!" Jeongguk lets out, spilling into his trousers as his eyes widen, lust-blown and dark as he gazes into Jimin's eyes.
Jimin smiles at the sight, brushing the younger hair's forehead before he leans in to press their mouths together softly. "You did really well, baby."
Jeongguk grins as well, cheeks flushed so he covers them up. "I wanna suck you off."
Jimin coughs, blushing.
As much as he likes that they were this compatible, it's getting late, and he'd rather not break his best friend's improving sleep schedule.
"Any other day, I'd take you up on that offer, but it's okay," Jimin says, kissing the younger's forehead as he gestures for them to get up. "It's better if we do it when we're both well-rested, mm? But we can take a shower together to clean up—no funny business—and cuddle with kisses to sleep. Sound good, baby?"
"You're so good to me, hyung," Jeongguk kisses his cheek, holding his hand as they head to the bathroom.
"Anything for my boyfriend," Jimin says nonchalantly, smirking at his dongsaeng as they shower.
Jeongguk gives him his widest smile, dimples and bunny cheek grin, so in love. "I'm so lucky."
But so was he, so it's all even, really.