Chapter Text
Stumbling over my own feet as I tried to flee as fast as my retired track legs could move. Faster. Faster. You have to go faster. I could feel the burning of every breath I took in my lungs and I struggled to continue running. How long have I been running now? Ten minutes? Ten hours? Ten years? I’ve lost count, and now I’ve lost my breath. Lost my footing. Lost all hope I previously had. Oh, where did it all go wrong? Young, ten year old me. What could you have done differently, to avoid this fate? This oh, so unfortunate fate of running away from your problems only for them to catch up to you in the end. No amount of miles ran around a track could save you from this. Now, it is time to face your consequences. In another lifetime, I will chose my destiny wisely. Never again will I be blinded by my infatuation for someone else. Never again.
This world is an ocean.
———
“Hello? Can you hear me?” “Are you sure he’s not dead?” “I’m not a doctor, I just took a few courses! I don’t really know if he’s dead or alive!” “Do CPR!” “I don’t know h-“ “Shut up! I’ve got a pulse guys!”
The first hue I saw when I opened my eyes after what felt like forever was a beautiful bronze lit by the sun. A pair of eyes outlined by dark, stark lashes. Sit up, I urged myself, for all you know these people could be here to finish you off. But when I finally remember how to breathe, I choke up heaps of blood and feel as if I am about to pass out all over again. The taste of iron fills my mouth as I hear people trying to call out to me, I slowly slip away again. The last hue I see are those beautiful, pleading bronze eyes.
———
White. Not a hue, but a shade. The room smells of sterilization and disinfectant. A hospital, I believe I’ve been admitted into a hospital. But, I’ve no insurance to pay for a bill. I need to leave. I can’t stay here, I have to get back home. Back to work. Work, work, work. I can’t be in more debt. Get up, get up. Get up, dammit!
“Matsuno-sama, you’ve awakened!” A nurse speaks to me, and rushes out as quickly as she came in. “I can’t stay here.” I tell myself as I sit up, trying to climb out of bed only to see I am hooked to several monitors and one of my legs is wrapped in a cast. No matter, I can treat myself at home. I’m as good as dead anyway if they find me alive. I must leave at once. Oh, I can’t stand up. I fall as soon as my free foot touches the wooden hospital floor. “Mastuno-sama, you must rest! It’s been two months since you’ve last awoken! You’ll have to go to physical therapy to relearn how to walk!”
“Why am I here? I can’t be here, I can’t even afford to be here. They’re gonna kill me, you don’t understand. They’ll find me and kill me,
like my okaa-san!” I cried as I sat there, knees cold against the wooden floor. “Please calm down Matsuno-sama, you have a visitor. I believe he will be able to clear up your questions, or at least some of them. The doctor is also on the way and will be here shortly.” The nurse has a very soothing voice, not one of those really high pitched voices. Her voice is like my okaa-san’s. Very smooth and calm. She helps me back into my bed as I try to recollect any possible memory I have of coming here, but to no avail.
“Hello, it’s nice to finally speak to you. I’m glad you’re making a nice recovery.” Bronze eyes. Those piercing bronze eyes contrasted by the stark dark lashes. “It’s you! Who are you? How’d you find me? What’s your motive?” I scoot over on my bed, as far from him as I possibly can. “Ah, I suppose I should’ve begun with that,” Bronze eyes bore into mine as he spoke. “I’m Keisuke, Baji Keisuke. I found you during a hike with some good friends of mine, I have no ulterior motives. I can see why you’re so cautious, but believe me when I say you can trust me.” The man-Baji-san-smiled at me and it made the sides of his eyes crinkle up.
“I see.” Is all I respond with while I pick at my IV injection cord. “I recommend you don’t bother that, you snatched it out a few times in your delirium and it wasn’t pretty.” Baji-san suggested to me, he just sat there watching me as I gazed out of the window. No ulterior motive my ass. “What prompted you to help me? You could’ve just left me dead in the woods.” I question, a rather good one to ask in my opinion. Most bypassers would have done that, so what makes him different? “Because I couldn’t just leave you in the woods to die, it’s against my morals. Besides, you may have been unconscious but any person with eyes could see your body didn’t hold that lifeless tone to it. That should be enough to prompt anyone to help.”
But they didn’t, only you did. And I still don’t quite understand why. “What do you even gain out of helping me? I mean, we’re complete strangers aside from knowing the others name.” I am getting agitated now, and hungry. I want something to eat. Maybe some chicken? Chicken sounds nice right now. “Like I said, morals. Didn’t the nurse say the doctor was coming? Where’s he at?” I watch as the man, sorry, Baji-san, stands up and walks out of my room to find out where the doctor is. Ah, I should’ve asked for him to ask about food.
He wants something. I can tell in his body language. He’s very fidgety, though he does hold eye contact and speaks in a sincere tone, but he seems a bit nervous. His eyes tend to dart to the left every so often, a hint of a false statement. He shifts in his seat often, though the hospital chairs had a lack of cushioning. Anyone would be uncomfortable sitting in one of them. “What do you do for work?” I decide to ask when he comes back into the room, I suppose the doctor was not in the hallway. “I’m a shareholder for an entertainment company.” He answers me straightforwardly, I sense that he is being truthful.
“Oh, that’s nice.” I ponder about what to ask next, but before I can think of anything the doctor has arrived and Baji-san is asked to exit the room. How unfortunate.
———
I have been discharged from the hospital as of today. I must use crutches to support my walking and take medication daily for a swift full recovery. Only one problem stands. I’ve no place to go. If I return home, they will find me and make sure I’m dead this time. I have been given a second opportunity at life, I mustn’t waste it. But the only option I have is to find a job as quickly as possible, where they will not be able to find me.
“Chifuyu-chan! I’ve come to see you on your discharge day!” Oh, him again. Baji Keisuke hasn’t been here recently, I figure because of work. He did send me packages and such while I was still admitted. “Hello Baji-san. Thank you for your health packages these past few days. I appreciate them.” I tell him as I limp across the room. “Don’t mention it! Would you like for me to drive you home?” He offers, appearing to be completely oblivious of the fact that I have no home, no family, not even a job anymore. I’ve missed too many days of work and am now unemployed and replaced. Of course, I have no intentions of telling him this. I will work things out on my own, without anyone’s help. I will not make the same mistake twice.
“No, that’s alright. Thank you for the offer, I will make it home safely. Thank you for visiting me and overseeing my health these past few months.” I bow as low as I can with the lasting soreness in my torso. “Nonsense! I’ll drive you home and see to it that you’re safe and situated.” He is very persistent. But being persistent can get you shutdown easily. “I wouldn’t want to take time out of your busy schedule. Have a nice one Baji-san.” I try to leave, but he follows me. How arrogant. “My schedule is rather slack for today, let’s go grab something to eat!” Wow, he really doesn’t know how to take a hint, eh? I guess a bite to eat wouldn’t hurt. Oh, I don’t have any money. The last paycheck I was due to receive has been withheld from me, probably their doing.
“That would be nice, but I’ve no money to spare.” I confess as I rest my body against my crutch. “Oh, then how do you plan on getting home?” Gosh, now you’ve done it Chifuyu. This is why we just say no and move along. “Oh, I guess I didn’t think about that.” I frown and look around the hospital. “Don’t worry about the money, let’s get you some food in your stomach. I can drive you home after.” Surely he’s seen the eviction letters come in from my landlord after I was in the hospital for several months and unable to pay any bills whatsoever. He seems to be the nosy type, so why does he keep insisting on taking me home? Is it to get the truth out of me? I’ll bet he’s not been telling the whole truth either…
“Are you sure? I wouldn’t want to burden you.” “It wouldn’t be a burden, what would you like to eat?” He asks me, and the only thing that comes to mind is a mouth watering pork cutlet bowl. “Pork cutlet sounds really nice right now.” I mutter as I pick at the chipping paint on my crutches. “Then pork cutlet it is! Come along, you can have all the pork cutlet bowls your heart desires.” He beams and allows me to lean against him for support as I get used to walking with my crutches. They tell me it’s a miracle I can walk again after the damage done to my legs and back, but I think I’d rather be paralyzed in a wheelchair rather than hobbling around like this. Eh, maybe not. I do love my legs.
———
I’m on my third cutlet bowl when I begin to feel full and refreshed. This beats the toast and soup diet any day. I suppose I’ve succumbed to the mention of food. I’ve accepted enough help from this man already. I look up at Baji-san who is reading what looks like a play script? Right, he did say that he was a shareholder of a performing arts agency some time ago. This must be part of his work. I glance at the paper. I see, a movie script. I went to school and majored in performing arts. Up until I had to dropout of course.
“Do you find my work interesting?” He has noticed my staring and now I’m embarrassed. “Oh, yes. I went to school for the arts for a few years.” I have shared a bit too much, and it will come back to bite me in the bum later. Like it always does. “Oh, did you? Would you be interested in an interview for a position in our acting department? You have very flattering and rather symmetrical features.” A job? Or, at least potentially. But, I’m very rusty when it comes to my acting skills, and my emotions are not nearly flexible enough anymore.
“You could also go as an idol, or even a model. The agency has classes for every profession we offer positions in.” Baji-san includes and modeling perks my interest for a moment. If they don’t like my acting, then modeling could be another option. “I’ll accept the acting opportunity.” I tell him. Oh, another favor I’ve absentmindedly accepted. He nods and goes back to reading, briefly glancing at his phone before smiling and looking at me again.
“I hope you don’t mind me doing this, but I’ve booked you a room close to the agency for a quick commute there and back. The reservation is for however long you need it.” He informs me and my earlier suspicious are correct. He’s seen the eviction letters, no way he hasn’t. My doctor has seen it his own self, I’m sure he’s mentioned it to him given that he’s the only one who’s visited me. I can’t help but feel rather thankful and a small smile creeps across my face. “Thank you, I appreciate it.” I bow but Baji-san shakes his head. “Don’t mention it, it’s my pleasure. I’ll do anything to assist you, so please feel free to confide in me.” I nod and finish the rest of my pork cutlet in silence. I’ll wind up owing this man for decades at this rate.
———
When I step into the room that has been reserved for me, I am astonished by how vast and expensive-looking it is. And to think I thought the lobby was extravagant, this is a completely different level. A small “wow” escapes my lips and I hear Baji-san chuckle beside me. “Do you like it? I can always find a new room for you if this one isn’t to your satisfaction.” He offers to me, but it isn’t necessary. This is amazing, anyone who wouldn’t accept this room is mental. “No, I like this room. Thank you.” I say, as I walk further into the room to explore. Stairs! There are even stairs! “Where do these lead to?” I am curious what I will come across if I decide to venture up the staircase. “Oh, that just leads to my place. Nothing special really, sorry to be the bearer of bad news.” Well that’s new, I’ve never heard of one room leading up to another one. Oh, wait.
“Is this your house?” I ask, deciding to walk upstairs and peek around. “Not exactly, my place can actually be entered by going to the top floor. This one is just connected to it per my request.” He explains to me as I slowly go further up the stairs, until my bare feet touch a cold tiled floor. Oh, I’m in a kitchen! I walk further into the house and take in everything. I’d live here too if I could. “This place is amazing,” I take in my surroundings. “I’d stay here forever if I could.” Oh, there I go again. My mouth moving faster than my mind. Baji-san appears to be shocked by my statement, though I guess its a reasonable reaction. I don’t normally enthuse about things often, except pork cutlet bowls, yakisoba, and apparently nice houses.
“Well, you’re free to stay as long as you please. I have some documents to go over so I’ll be in my office if you need anything.” He tells me and ruffles my hair a bit. I then realize that my hair has grown a lot and is quite overdue for a trim. I should see if there are scissors anywhere around here. I walk back downstairs to my quarters and search the house for a pair of scissors, finding some in the bathroom. How convenient. I haven’t cut my own hair in ages, it may turn out messy and now I am doubting my skills with a pair of scissors and a mirror. Oh, I think there was a PC in the living room. Maybe I can search up a tutorial.
———
I’ve given up. I’ll have to manage with the longer hair I suppose. Maybe it’ll die and fall off after awhile. “Chifuyu-chan, is everything alright? I heard a lot of slamming and swearing.” Oh, I guess I was rather loud. I have to be more considerate of the people around me. “Oh, yes. Sorry for the disturbance, I was just a bit frustrated.” I respond and take a seat on the sofa. Baji-san comes downstairs a few moments later, his long dark hair pulled up into a messy bun and his sleeves rolled up to his forearm. His glowing bronze eyes search the room and land on me as a smile appears on his face. He seems a bit too happy to see me.
“Were you attempting to cut your hair?” He asks and I am a bit stunned into silence. “How did you know?” I finally ask, standing up from my spot on the sofa as I watch him laugh softly. “I can see the tutorial video on the computer screen. You also left the trimming scissors on the floor.” He bends over to pick up said scissors and grins at me with them in hand. “Oh, I see. Well, yes I was attempting to but I can’t seem to quite get it.” “Here, I’ll cut it for you. Would you like a trim or a completely new style?” Oh, well this was unexpected. Though, I guess with so much hair it’s only natural to know how to trim it yourself. “Um, whatever you feel like doing is fine with me.” Is my response and Baji-san has a puzzled look across his bold features.
Now that I’m looking at him more closely and not from a hospital bed while heavily medicated, he has a rather handsome face. And a nice build altogether. Aside from his bronze eyes that contrast beautifully with his dark lashes, he has a chiseled jaw and structured face. A nice slender nose, and his smile is very bright with sharp canines on both rows. His hair, when its down, frames his face perfectly and looks very soft. As for his bodily structure, let’s just say fit is a bit of an understatement. Especially when it comes to his legs. He’s currently in a tank top and pair of joggers, and you can see the muscles rippling through the fabric. Someone certainly hasn’t skipped leg day in a while.
“Well, I think you look good with longer hair. I’ll trim it to even it out for you, just make sure you’re still so I don’t accidentally cut too much off.” He tells me, and I believe he’s seen me analyzing his body from the tiny smirk he has spreading across his lips. I hold still and wait patiently for him to finish. He has a smile of satisfaction when he has finished and I can’t help but pat my hair to make sure it’s still there. “I think you look good.” He tells as he takes my chin in his hand and gently tilts my head from side to side. “Wait here,” he grins. “I’m going to bring you a mirror!” Off he runs around the corner to the bathroom and leaves me wondering if my hair actually looks okay or if it doesn’t fit how my face is structured like how his falls perfectly around his portable poitrait on shoulders.
When he returns with the mirror and reveals my new hair, I am speechless. The last thing I expected was the same cut as his. It’s just relatively shorter since his runs down his back. It actually looks good, contrary to my expectations. “Oh wow,” I gasp and as I look at Baji-san, I can feel a small smile playing on my lips. “I like it, a lot. Thanks.” I avert my gaze when I start to feel a blush flitter across my cheeks. I refuse to have any romantic attraction to anyone. No, this is my second chance at life. I won’t allow it.
“I’m glad, it looks really good on you. You’re very cute Chifuyu-chan, I think this is a good opportunity for you to embrace your attractiveness.” Oh? I don’t know if he’s being sincere or not. He’s holding my gaze yet he seems to be so unbothered as if he didn’t mean a word he said. “Your interview will be Tuesday, You get to meet your manager and coworkers tomorrow. Rest well Chifuyu-chan.” He ruffles my hair again and heads upstairs. I suppose it is about time to turn in for the night. What will I wear tomorrow though? I don’t have any clothes with me. I guess it wouldn’t exactly hurt to ask.
“Excuse me Baji-san, what will I do about clothes for this upcoming week?” I ask as I walk up the stairs. “Oh, right I guess I’ll have to send someone out tomorrow..” I hear him mutter and turn to find him in the bathroom with a towel around his waist. I guess that he was planning on getting into the shower before I interrupted him. Oops. But his body looks even better without a tank top hiding all he had to offer. Seriously Chifuyu, get it together.
“For now, I think I may have a few clothes you could wear. Your frame isn’t too small, what size do you wear?” He asks me as he walks out of his bathroom and to the closet, his towel sliding down to his hips revealing a tattoo right under his bellybutton. A swarm of butterflies on a single flower. What kind of flower is that though? I squint to try and get a better look, but he has turned and disappeared into the closet in search of clothes for me.
I think of the single tattoo I have, right on my lower back lies a dove with my mother’s favorite flower, a hazel flower. She would say they symbolize new beginnings. When she passed, I had her cremated along with a hazel flower. Now that I think about it, I got this tattoo in this area because I overheard it was trendy..I didn’t know they were talking about for women. Of course, I could never afford laser removal so it’s still there. It’s alright though, makes me feel as if my mother is here still in a way. Still wish the placement was better though.
“This is the smallest thing I could find. You seem to have a small but structured build so I think you’ll be able to fit it.” Oh, I forgot I was here for a second. “Thank you Baji-san.” “No problem, rest up. You’re gonna want to impress your manager tomorrow.” He recommends to me, I nod and accept the clothes. When I get a moment to look at them, they’re a pair of cargo pants and a sweater that look as if they’re both too big for my frame. I guess only tomorrow will tell. I am about to step into the shower when I remember I need a new pair of boxers to change into. The hospital should have had a shop inside of it, then I’d have a few items to hold me off. I would hate to disturb Baji-san again…but if that’s the case then going commando is my only option.
Commando it is.
———
When I awoke the next morning, the sun was bright as it filtered through my window. A very lovely hue of gold fell over the room. I reach over to get out of bed, then remember once I’ve hit the floor that I need to get around on crutches. Would an entertainment agency really want someone who needs walking support as an employee? Baji-san comes rushing downstairs, I assume he’s heard the thud from my fall. His hair is a mess and he looks disheveled, as if he’s just woken up. It’s actually kinda hot.
“I’m sorry, did I wake you?” I ask as I pull myself back up and reach for my crutches. “Yes, but don’t worry about that. Are you alright, how did you fall?” Oh, this is the most worried someone has been for me in a while. “I’m alright, I just forgot I can’t walk as usual. It takes a while to get used to this.” I respond and make my way over to the bathroom where I have hung my clothes for today.
“Okay, please be careful. Let me know if you need anything.” Baji-san smiles at me and turns to leave but I remember my commando issue and decide to ask about it. Though, I doubt I can fit any underwear of his. “Actually, I’m sorry to ask this of you, but do you possibly have any boxers I could borrow?” Actually, I shouldn’t have said anything because now I feel embarrassed and as if I’m going to topple over and wallow in my own self pity. “Yeah, I can see if I have a pair. I’ll send someone to the store just in case.” He tells me and heads back upstairs. Wait, maybe I made this more of a big deal than it is. I mean, he didn’t even bat an eye at my request.
“Okay, so I’m not too sure if you’ll be able to fit these, but try them on and let me know.” Baji-san hands me three different pairs of boxers and I don’t think I’ll ever grow to fit these a day in my life. I try them on, and to my surprise the second pair actually somewhat fit. I fold them up and place them on the counter then start my shower up.
———
“I’m guessing you could fit a pair?” Baji-san asks me as I pull on the large sweater. He is now dressed as well, in a grey blazer with a pair of pants to match and a cream colored shirt underneath. “Oh, yes I was. Thank you for letting me borrow them.” I bow and smooth my shirt down before slowly making my way over to the couch and taking a seat. “No problem, would you like some breakfast before heading out?” He offers, but I’m feeling very anxious about meeting my manager though my face probably doesn’t show it. “That’s alright, I don’t want to end up being late.” I say and stand with the help of my crutch. I am considering leaving them here when I almost trip and fall over.
“Tch, stupid legs.” I grumble as I regain my balance. Baji-san looks at me and offers his arm for me to lean on. “We can walk around the park everyday until you can walk on your own. Similar to your physical therapy at the hospital.” He offers as I steady myself against his large frame. I nod, though it is getting rather cold out to be walking around outside. But I’ll do just about anything to be relieved from those damned crutches. “Though, I do recommend you still use your crutches any other time you’re walking long distances. You don’t want to overexert yourself, it’ll take time to get used to walking again.” Well that’s not what I want to hear. I agree, though I am rather reluctant about it, and grab my crutches.
———
“Hi, it’s nice to meet you! I’m Shiba Yuzuha, your new potential manager.” Potential? “We have to wait until after the interview before everything is set in stone.” She clarifies, she must’ve seen my confusion in my expression. “I see, it’s nice to meet you as well. I’m Matsuno Chifuyu.” I shake her hand and look over at whom I guess is my coworker. “Sorry about him, thats Hakkai. He’s not very social.” Yuzuha-chan tells me and I nod in understanding while giving a small wave to him. He shyly waves back and stands up from his spot on a bench, revealing how tall he is. He looks to be somewhere around six feet. He’s not a model instead? Or does she manage multiple branches?
“I’m Hakkai Shiba, I do modeling and acting. I look forward to working with you.” He bows and I bow back. So he does both, maybe I could go for both too. Of course, I wouldn’t want to ask for too much or overwork myself. “Likewise, let’s do well together.” I say and Hakkai-kun nods. “Well, I’d like to ask a few questions of you if that’s alright?” Yuzuha-chan looks at me from over a clipboard she has. I nod and take a seat.
“Okay, it says here you’re twenty-five and went to school for the arts for a few years before dropping out. Is that right?” I nod, not really wanting to go into detail about my reason for quitting my studies. “So you’ve already got experience. That’s great! How many years did you go to school for?” “Like, college or in total?” “College, please.” “I went to college for two years and three months.” I shrug, I never really tell people about my college experience.
“School sucks so much time out your life.” I hear Hakkai groan and assume that he’s still a student. “Yes yes, we know how much you hate math and science Hakkai. Moving on,” Yuzuha-chan clears her throat and shuffles in her seat. “Do you have any talents?” Talents? I don’t really think of those often…I’m double jointed? “Um, I don’t think so? Unless you consider double jointedness and being able to fold my tongue into a four leaf clover a talent.” I shrug and Yuzuha-chan silently nods while Hakkai-kun tries to avert his gaze. I can see him giggling, but I’m actually dead serious.
“Okay..work experience?” She asks, but I’ve done anything that I could without a college degree. From fast-food to office jobs and being a male stripper at one point. “I’ve done a lot…of part time and full time work.” I answer, not wanting to go into details. Thankfully, Yuzuha-chan did not press any further. She asks me a few more questions before saying, “Well, I guess we have a bit to work with. Say, how good are you with memorizing and portraying a script?” Rusty, that’s what I wish I could say. “Uh, I was pretty good at it in school.” Just say you suck because you haven’t done it in years.
“Well, if you’re wanting to act then for the interview you’ll have to memorize a script and act it out.” Yuzuha-chan explains and I nod. I’m pretty thirsty, I think I saw a vending machine in the hallway. “Nee-san, I’ve got to head to my afternoon class.” Hakkai-kun stood up and was already packed up to leave. I didn’t even hear him moving around in the background, I guess he has a light tread. “Alright, safe travels! Focus well in class to!” Yuzuha-chan stands up to hug her brother to which he reciprocates the hug. “Nice meeting you Chifuyu-kun. I look forward to working with you!” He waves and heads out on his way, leaving me and his sister alone.
“Oh! I almost forgot, if all goes well with your interview then we’ll have to get you a headshot.” She says while tapping something on her iPad Air. “Like, a profiling picture?” I ask, I’ve taken a lot of those. I guess they were more like ID pictures though. “Uhh, I guess so? I suppose that is a good way to look at it, headshot kind of sounds like a mugshot now that I think about it…” Yuzuha-chan trails off. I’m still thirsty, I really wish I knew the exact location of that vending machine. “My throat is dry, I think I’m going to go grab a water. Would you like anything Chifuyu-kun?” Woah, is she a mind reader? “Could you get me a water please?” I ask and Yuzuha-chan nods before leaving me in the…wait I’m not too sure were I am right now. I just followed Baji-san here and I guess you could say I’m pretty lost. I need a cigarette.
———
I’ve found my way to the rooftop for a smoke, but I don’t have any cigarettes. Fun, I’ve wasted my time looking for the damn stairs only to find out there’s an elevator and don’t even have any cigs. Wait wait, I’m getting a whiff of something. Cigarette smoke, never thought I’d be so excited to smell a cancer stick nearby.
“Hey, you mind sliding me a cancer stick?” I ask. Silence. Fine, I guess this is the universe since I’m not supposed to be smoking anyway. But damn, you can’t just give me one? I hear a bit of shuffling and then a half of a cigarette on the ground before my feet. Oh? Well, a cig is a cig. “Thanks.” I say to whoever it is contributing to a sliver of the poor population by giving me a half burnt cig.
I pick up the cigarette and get all I can out of it before flicking it away. “Do you want some sort of payment for the cig?” I ask, sensing the presence of someone still nearby. “How do you plan on paying for it?” “Ah, he speaks.” I quip and turn around to scan the area for the source of the voice. Still don’t see anyone. “I don’t have any money on me…so I guess I’ll give you anything but money.” I shrug as the emptiness of my pockets seem heavy.
“How about paying with your body then?”