Chapter Text
It started like this. “Huh? You’re kidding me right? Your old school put a stick up your ass?” Shoto found the blond boy abrasive, rude, crude and utterly free. He didn’t know how to reconcile those mixed feelings. So he ignored it.
And then, “Deku, you bastard! Tell me how you did that or you’re dead!” And Shoto finally noticed the timid green haired boy who broke his finger to throw a simple ball. It infuriated the blond and Shoto couldn’t figure out why. So he ignored it.
Katsuki never admitted it, but Shoto terrified him. It was one of their first training sessions with All Might. Shoto had covered half of his body in ice. The other team didn’t stand a chance. And Katsuki felt unexplainable fear for the first time. The sludge villain was understandable. He was going to die. But the boy covered in ice that was meant to be one of his classmates sent cold chills down his spine. And it wasn’t because the boy had frozen the entire building that day. In those days, Katsuki was mad. So angry, he never let himself feel that fear again. He had to keep getting stronger. That's all that mattered back then.
It was in the aftermath of the villain attack on the USJ that Shoto finally acknowledged Katsuki. They stood side by side to defend their class. “The rest of the school is safe.” Kastuki’s gaze slid over to the boy half covered in ice. He didn’t say anything. There wasn’t anything to say between the two of them. Yet.
It was at the sports festival that Shoto did something bold. “Midoriya,” The whole room fell silent. “We’re not here to be each other's friends.” He meant it back then. He wanted nothing more than to beat the green haired boy who seemed so weak yet had the number one hero in his corner. He was a mystery to Shoto in those days.
It was what Izuku said next that Shoto still remembers to this day. “Wait a sec, Todoroki.” Shoto did pause, he was not expecting Izuku to reply at that moment. “I’ll be aiming for the top too.”
Katsuki scowled. Shoto only said, “Fine.”
Katsuki stepped up on stage, the crowd was silent and Shoto could tell — even he could tell — everyone was nervous about what Katsuki was going to possibly project to the entire stadium. “I just wanna say, I’m gonna win.” The classes erupted in angry shouting and booing at the blond haired boy. Shoto couldn’t help but smile. The blond with the explosive quirk was interesting, he’ll give him that much.
And then it happened. “I won’t let you get away so easily you icyhot bastard!” For the first time, Shoto acknowledged a challenge. Katsuki might actually have been a challenge. And in the end, Katsuki did win. But he still believes to this day that Shoto let him. Katsuki had a visceral reaction to it back then. If they had a rematch now, Izuku would probably come out on top. There was no doubt in anyones’ mind that the three of them were the next most promising pro heroes. But things soon changed. Katsuki died. A hole right through his chest where his heart was meant to be. And now it's just Izuku and Shouto, the most promising pro heroes.
It didn’t matter that others were trying to save the blond. The heroes and doctors were trying to stitch his heart back together. The pain Shouto felt in his chest could not be fooled. Katsuki died that day. And he lost a piece of Izuku forever. That day, a piece of Izuku crumbled and the monster it unleashed left Shouto frozen. Not even the fire licking at his skin could get him to move. Izuku’s screaming chilled him to the bone. He felt truly cold at that moment. The pain mirrored on the green haired boy's face could only be understood by the shattering of Shouto’s heart.
They were supposed to be heroes. The three of them talked about opening an agency one day. Katsuki and Izuku were his best sparring partners. They interned together. Izuku helped Shoto embrace his fire. Katsuki lit a match under him. They pushed each other to achieve more. To become the very best. It was never a question of if they’d become the number one hero. It was always which one of them would. And then Katsuki died. And nothing ever felt all that important again.
Izuku didn’t move from Katsuki’s side when he woke up. No one blamed the green haired boy for his tears. Katsuki was alive. By some miracle, he lived. They shouldn’t have been able to repair a hole through the heart. Shoto would know. Because even as the blond smirked at him from his hospital bed, Shouto felt empty. Like a gaping void where his heart should have been. But Kastuki was alive and Izuku was smiling again. So maybe with time Shoto wouldn’t feel so empty anymore. And no one said anything when Shoto decided not to leave the blond’s side either.
So, it started like this. “You love him?” Katsuki’s head whipped in the direction of Shoto. He didn’t say anything. He was caught. He was caught watching as Izuku climbed the stairs to his own room. He was caught with his eyes on his childhood friend and he had nothing to say as a result. “It’s okay if you do.” Shoto doesn't know when he first noticed, but it became an afterthought. Katsuki was in love with Izuku. It felt so natural like running water. It was the obvious conclusion.
“Shut up.” Katsuki grumbled. When had Shoto become so observant? He expected Eijiro to eventually put two and two together. Katsuki had been particularly bad with hiding it since escaping near death. He didn’t think Shoto had been paying that close attention though.
Shoto would have thought by their third year, after Katsuki’s miracle resurrection, that Izuku would have confessed. Or perhaps Katsuki would finally know the proper words to share his love for his childhood friend. But Shoto continued to sit in silence, watching the two of them pine for each other. Shoto couldn’t understand why neither of them made a move. Their feelings for each other were so blatantly obvious that even Shoto picked up on it. He didn’t know the first thing about love.
Their third year was almost over. Graduation was looming over their heads. Katsuki slammed Shoto against a padded wall. The blond never did go easy during sparring. Shoto usually gave it his all, but his mind had been wandering. And in that moment, Katsuki flushed against him with only the wall keeping them upright, Shoto saw something on Katsuki’s face that he could not read. He couldn’t ponder the emotion long because Katsuki’s lips pressed against his own and all he could think was Bakugou Bakugou BakugouBakugou BakugouBakugouBakugouBakugou Bakugou—
“Don’t tell the nerd.” So Shoto didn’t. He didn’t know how he felt about keeping a secret from Izuku. But it was his and Katsuki’s secret. Something only they shared. So he kept it. All they did was kiss. Late nights in their dorm rooms. During practice when no one is there to notice. In an empty classroom between bells. They kissed frequently and Shoto always believed more was to come, but Katsuki always put an end to it. All they did was kiss.
And then they graduated. The three of them joined Endeavor’s agency as sidekicks. Of course they could have started out differently. But something felt right about taking it slow. When Shoto turned eighteen in January after they graduated, Katsuki pushed him up against his bedroom wall. That time they did more than kiss. Katsuki took him apart piece by piece until he unraveled right there on his bed. Still, they didn't tell Izuku.
It wasn't until Shoto turned twenty years old that he realized the hole in his heart wasn't a void. It was love. And only Shoto would be so naive not to realize what love actually felt like. But then again, the idiots that he loved couldn't even tell each other how they felt for years. So, Shoto felt justified in keeping his love to himself. He’d rather watch Izuku and Katsuki fall for each other. However long it took. However long they’d let him stay by their side. It was enough for him. Until it wasn’t. Then he couldn't ignore it anymore.