Chapter Text
1
“Take your shirt off.”
The grin immediately works its way onto Minho’s lips, already so comfortable in Hyunjin’s embrace surrounding him from the back. Clearly, he’s taking too long reading his messages.
“Yeah?” he replies quietly, tilting his head to bump his nose into Hyunjin’s cheek beside him.
“Yeah,” Hyunjin murmurs back, already reaching for the hem of Minho’s shirt. It does look good on Hyunjin’s floor, he must admit that. “Come here.”
Minho pliantly raises his arms when the fabric comes off, tousling his hair and momentarily blinding him before Hyunjin’s hands are on his bare shoulders pulling him down, down, down. He turns around instinctively, twisting his torso until they’re face to face, and Minho realizes that this might not be going where he assumed it was.
“Let me feel you,” Hyunjin pleads, on his back in his messy sheets, dark hair spread all around him. “Let me be close to you for a while. ‘Want your skin on mine.”
Silently, Minho nods. The duvet is strewn haphazardly to the side from when Hyunjin woke up this morning, but Minho finds a corner and tugs it over his own shoulders before leaning back down to cover Hyunjin’s body with his own. His boyfriend is already shirtless, was in the middle of changing when Minho came inside, and then latched onto him like that without further argument.
He’s a bit cold after those few minutes of exposure though, Minho can’t help but notice. Hence why the duvet and his own body heat are very much necessary.
“Good? he checks softly, pulling at the duvet until it’s more or less tucked beneath Hyunjin’s shoulder blades and they’re both completely hidden. “What else, hmm?”
“You,” Hyunjin exhales, eyes falling shut, as if Minho truly is everything he could ever want or need. The sensation has Minho’s fingertips tingling. “Just you.”
“Well,” Minho mumbles back, letting his index finger run down Hyunjin’s hairline, “good thing you have me, then, Hyunjin-ah.”
“Minho,” is the breathless, muted, heartfelt reply he receives as both of Hyunjin’s arms wrap tightly around his middle. “Hyung. Minho, Minho, Minho. Don’t go. Stay here with me.”
“I wouldn’t leave you for anything in the world, Hwang Hyunjin.”
A small and whimpery sound leaves the younger at that, even though he’s quick to silence it by pressing his lips against Minho’s forearm next to his face. Minho takes the opportunity to kiss Hyunjin’s cheek, temple, eyebrow - anything he can reach, really. He’d kiss every part of Hyunjin if he had the time. And also if he managed to tear himself away from his favorite spots.
“Don’t go,” Hyunjin repeats, mouthing sweetly into Minho’s skin and the protruding vein Hyunjin’s teeth sort of nips at. “Hyung, listen to me. Minho, Minho, Minho. Be here with me. Be close to me. Forever.”
“I will,” he responds, not seeing any point in telling Hyunjin anything but the utter truth. “Baby, I will. You don’t have to worry about that for a second.”
Minho doesn’t actually know if these moments of intimacy and honesty and vulnerability originate from the way Hyunjin has felt while being rejected or placed aside before, or if they’re a spur of the moment kind of thing and he’s just showing it more openly now than he used to, or if they’re something completely different. He doesn’t know, but he’s not sure that it matters either. Whatever the reason he wants to be reassured, Minho wants to be the one to do it.
Forever, if that’s what Hyunjin wants.
“Hyung,” Minho hears again while he’s breathing in Hyunjin’s shampoo from last night. “Minho, I love you.”
I love you too, Minho’s head immediately replies, but his mouth doesn’t quite shape the words where they’re hidden in Hyunjin’s hair. Instead, he tightens his arms into a proper embrace and lets Hyunjin in as closely as he may want while Minho holds him securely, not planning on letting go until absolutely necessary. Not a second sooner than that.
I love you too, his inner voice echoes. I love you too.
***
2
A loud huff echoes through the hallway even before Minho reaches the room where Hyunjin keeps all his canvas and easels and paints and brushes. No luck today either, then.
“Hi, Hyunjinnie,” he greets his boyfriend, knocking lightly on the doorframe before leaning against it with crossed arms. “How are you doing?”
“Awful,” Hyunjin replies sourly, slumping in his chair.
In front of him is what Minho assumes to be a half-finished painting of the night sky, before Hyunjin must have ruined it through angry strokes of bright orange on top of the otherwise dark background. He’s no artist himself and obviously doesn’t know what Hyunjin was going for, but Minho has seen enough of his boyfriend’s art by now to know that this most likely wasn’t the planned outcome.
“Did you eat?” Minho asks instead, changing the topic. It’s almost eleven at night, and he ate like three hours ago, but with Hyunjin one can never really know unfortunately.
“Mm,” Hyunjin mutters, shrugging while he glares at the offensive orange streak he put there himself. “With Jisungie. Before they left for the studio. It’s been hours, I think.”
“Okay,” Minho responds, quickly making up his mind. “What do you say we get a company car and drive around for a bit? See if it helps?”
He doesn’t expand further on what exactly a nightly drive might be helpful for, but it appears that he doesn’t need to. Hyunjin figures it out easily.
“What if it doesn’t work?” he asks quietly, almost mumbling while he stares at his canvas rather than his boyfriend. “What if my creativity is broken? What if it’s gone? That happens. I know it happens. I couldn’t paint properly for weeks because of the cast. Minho, what if it…? What if it’s broken? What do I do then?”
“It isn’t,” Minho tells him readily, already stalking inside to pull Hyunjin up from his seat and away from his painting. His boyfriend is heavy in his arms, but goes willingly. “Your creativity is not broken and neither are you. If it doesn’t work tonight, it will some other time. Worst case we’ll have McDonald’s and ogle each other, yeah? Come with me.”
Hyunjin mutters and grumbles while clinging onto Minho’s entire front, who settles for patting his boyfriend’s back comfortingly. Minho isn’t very worried, but he doesn’t want Hyunjin to think he’s being dismissive either.
Getting hold of a car is always a whole process, but Minho hopes that it serves as a nice distraction for his sullen companion. Hyunjin does smile - albeit weakly - when Minho leans over to fasten his seatbelt and kiss his cheek in the process, before leaving him be as they head out on the streets. Minho hasn’t heard any specific suggestions or requests on where to go, so he takes them towards the outskirts of town where Hyunjin might be able to catch sight of the stars if he looks out his window. He’s not hungry yet, so Minho can put off the food for a bit. And besides, Hyunjin’s appetite usually doesn’t increase when he’s feeling down.
Thirty minutes must have passed when Hyunjin tentatively asks if Minho could pull over for a second, so he does at the nearest opportunity. The streets are relatively empty, which is nice, and the traffic fades into background noise even as Hyunjin lowers his window to lean out and try his luck with the camera of his tiny, red phone. Well, Minho admits; it looks tiny in Hyunjin’s hands, at least.
“Should we grab a bite?” he asks a minute or two later as Hyunjin scrolls through his camera roll, inspecting the photos. “Where to, my love?”
Predictably - and magnificently - Hyunjin smiles. One of those soft, deep-gazed, hidden-meaning expressions he has reserved for Minho alone. One of Minho’s favorite looks on his boyfriend, because it never fails to take his breath away, even temporarily. He hasn’t gotten used to it yet, and Minho sort of hopes that he never will. He never wants to take this feeling for granted. It’s much too special for that.
“To the stars,” Hyunjin replies, smiling as he locks his phone and relaxes back into his seat. It’s the easiest he’s seemed all night. “To the ocean. To the other side of the world and back again. I go everywhere with you, hyung. Isn’t it wonderful?”
“It sort of is, yeah,” Minho agrees. Not the answer he expected, but maybe one he should have. It’s Hyunjin he’s talking to, after all. “You’ll follow where I take you, then?”
“I will,” Hyunjin says, sweet as sugar, as cotton candy, as Minho’s favorite flavored pudding. Sweeter than all of them combined. “I love you. Take me anywhere. You took me here.”
“I did,” is all Minho says, hoping that Hyunjin’s words really mean ‘you fixed me’, ‘you helped me’, ‘you made a difference and now I feel better’.
Hyunjin doesn’t say any of that, but Minho can’t help but feel like he did.
I love you too, part of him wants to say, but he doesn’t. He hopes Hyunjin can feel like he said it regardless. I love you too.
***
3
“Baby, come on,” Minho coaxes, trying real hard to keep the smile out of his voice while Hyunjin huffs and puffs on the other end of the couch in Minho’s dorm. “Hyunjinnie, I’m really sorry. I apologize. Come back, sweetheart. Come cuddle with me again.”
“No,” Hyunjin refuses, a petulant little pout on his pretty face. “You don’t deserve cuddles.”
“I know,” Minho concedes, easily bending if that’s what it’ll take to get his boyfriend back into his arms, “you’re right, hyung was being really silly. I’m sorry. Please come back.”
“Hmph,” Hyunjin says, glaring once, but then he crawls over until he’s plopping down sideways with his head in Minho’s lap and his slender body occupies the rest of the couch.
Not quite what Minho had in mind, but he’ll definitely take it.
“Hyunjinnie,” he coos, threading his fingers through his boyfriend’s hair while speaking softly to make up for his previous mistake. “My little baby. My angel baby. The sweetest little thing to walk this earth. Little angel baby darling muffi--”
“Stop!” Hyunjin shrieks, bursting into laughter while he squirms around on the cushions. “Hyung, come on, be serious.”
“Like you?”
Hyunjin scoffs playfully before rolling onto his back and looking up at Minho through glimmering eyes, still with Minho’s fingers in his hair and his own hands resting over his stomach. He looks totally relaxed and not like he’s going anywhere, which pleases Minho immensely.
“I was being a little serious,” he replies, narrowing his eyes for a moment to make sure Minho is listening, probably. “You know I don’t like it when you call me that.”
“‘That’?” Minho repeats, just because he can. “You mean your name?”
Some quiet grumbling, and then: “Yes.”
“Okay,” Minho says easily, looking fondly at the boy in his lap.
His cute little boyfriend who doesn’t like it when people refer to him by his full name, or when they speak to him in a tone that can’t be described as ‘soft’. His cute little boyfriend who strongly disapproves when it’s Minho especially doing either of those things.
His cute little boyfriend who needs to be coaxed back into Minho’s proximity after such a mishap, clearly.
“Hyung’s really sorry, Hyunjinnie,” he murmurs, already tender voice made even more so by the small and pleased smile blooming over the younger’s face. “I’ll do better in the future. ‘Don’t want my baby to run away from me whenever I need kisses.”
“Good,” Hyunjin settles with a firm nod and eyes locked on Minho’s. “Do better, please. And if you really have to call my name, please do it a bit gently.”
“Okay,” Minho agrees while warmth spreads throughout his limbs. Hyunjin’s eyes close when Minho’s fingers find a good spot to scratch lightly. “I’ll try to always call you gently, then. My little baby love.”
“‘Little baby love’,” Hyunjin mumbles to himself, instantly grinning happily while he squirms a bit more across Minho’s thighs. “Little baby. Baby love. Little love. Little baby love.”
“Mmmhm,” Minho hums, watching on with unblinking eyes. “That’s you, Hyunjinnie.”
“‘Hyunjinnie’,” his adorable boyfriend echoes, wiggling around cutely. “That’s me. I like that. I’m Hyunjinnie.”
I love you, Minho thinks, afraid to say it in case it bursts Hyunjin’s joyful, pink bubble. He doesn’t want that, even though he knows that Hyunjin most likely would reply with ‘I love you, too’. I love you too, his mind reverberates instead. I love you too. I love you too. I love you too.
***
4
It’s honestly just as exhilarating doing this for the twentieth time as it was the first and second and third time, even though Minho wouldn’t have dared to hope that it would. But the rush is there, shooting figurative sparks out of the fingertips that are cautiously opening him up further, and he can’t wait for Hyunjin to wake up and make that lovely sound he only produces while half-asleep.
He thanks the heavens for the privacy of personal rooms, even though his and his boyfriend’s are in very different places. That can’t be helped. Maybe. He’s not sure yet. But what he is sure of is that coming over and spending the night and waking up together is pretty magical, and there’s not many experiences that can compete in Minho’s opinion.
Seeing Hyunjin first thing in the morning is something he wishes he could take for granted, but he can’t. Not yet. He’s still surprised sometimes, still absolutely awestruck in certain moments, still unable to keep his paws to himself on mornings where he knows that they have nowhere to be.
Mornings like these.
Where Minho wakes up next to his boyfriend, half-curled against him but not entirely, always asleep because Minho is the early riser out of them. Where he kisses Hyunjin’s face and lips and hair as gently as he can, often finding no response at all. Where he carefully nudges Hyunjin onto his back without waking him too soon, and proceeds to take his time kissing Hyunjin’s jaw, Hyunjin’s shoulder, Hyunjin’s rib cage. All the places he usually neglects because Hyunjin’s lips taste the sweetest and the salt of his sweat is addictive but collects around his neck, and if Hyunjin is sleeping he can’t complain about how slow or teasing Minho is being.
It’s a win-win, actually.
The moment of truth usually comes when he pokes at Hyunjin’s sleepwear, keeping watchful eyes on the younger’s face while Minho toys with the hems, with the waistband, on top of the fabric. Like most mornings, Hyunjin barely stirs. Also like most mornings, he instinctively parts his legs a bit as soon as Minho gets comfortable between them. A relatively small movement that makes Minho ridiculously pleased and excited, to be honest.
He doesn’t bother pulling Hyunjin’s small shorts all the way off, instead opting to catch the waistband with his fingers to pull off his body and as far down as Minho needs. Then he starts trailing kisses around Hyunjin’s bony hips, the soft skin below his belly button, and finally the tip of his pink head. Just kissing, mostly teasing himself while Hyunjin’s body slowly catches up even while unconscious.
The first hitch of breath reaches his ears once Minho has got said tip inside his mouth, licking slowly and sucking gently just to see what might happen this time. This morning. He’s rewarded for his patience when the tiny gasp leaves Hyunjin’s mouth and his legs close in on Minho’s shoulders, already braced to keep them apart.
He pops off carefully before trailing wet, dirty, open-mouthed kisses down Hyunjin’s entire length and below it, now that he’s more or less fully hard, making sure to keep his actions playful and light in case Hyunjin is on the verge of waking up so it’ll be as easy and comfortable as possible. His hands are buried in Hyunjin’s thighs more out of habit than any kind of force, truthfully.
A quiet whine sounds through the room eventually, and then Hyunjin’s fingers twitch, and then Minho decides that since his boyfriend is waking up he’ll give him a little treat to actually wake up to. That precious, throaty, almost helpless sound Hyunjin makes when he comes to and registers the pleasure makes it all worth it, Minho thinks, even though he generally likes it more when Hyunjin’s mind is as present as his body.
The fourth bob of his head down Hyunjin’s entire length is what Minho focuses on when he feels a familiar - although uncoordinated - hand tangle in his already messy hair, and he pauses to see if Hyunjin is about to pull him off.
He doesn’t.
“Hyung,” Hyunjin sighs, breathless and smiling, even though his eyes are hooded and his limbs heavy when Minho can look at him properly again. “Hyung, you… you followed through.”
“Did you think I wouldn’t?” Minho replies, just as hushed, just as happy.
“I haven’t forgotten about that night at the hotel just yet,” Hyunjin informs him while Minho chuckles in response. Figures.
He hollows his cheeks the next time he takes Hyunjin into his mouth, making sure to hold and swallow even though his eyes sting, because Hyunjin’s moan is outright obscene and Minho fucking hopes someone heard it. Hyunjin deserves to be heard, he thinks. No less while being pleasured.
“Hand me the lube, baby,” he instructs while wiping the drool off his own chin, grinning when it takes Hyunjin a moment to stop staring and reach for the nightstand. “There we are. Wonderful.”
From there it doesn’t take much to get that third finger behind him for the last of the necessary preparations, before Minho pins his boyfriend down by the wrists and seats himself comfortably on top of Hyunjin’s lap. There’s a small sting - which is to be expected whenever Minho focuses on Hyunjin’s pleasure more than his own - but the stretch is so good and Minho likes to think that last night’s activities were helpful as well.
Hyunjin’s plump lips are far apart and his gaze almost as far away, which is a look Minho absolutely adores on his boyfriend. It’s a little sad to see it go when Minho leans down to kiss him, but definitely worth it. With his hips working slow circles and Hyunjin’s grinding upwards into it, the sensation is heady as much as it is nice. Minho likes this; likes everything about this. And judging by the sounds Hyunjin is letting through, there’s no doubt whether or not he likes it either.
“Hyung,” Hyunjin whispers between long, lazy kisses. “Minho hyung. Minho.”
“Yeah, baby?”
“Thank you for this,” Hyunjin says softly, gasping before sighing and sinking even deeper into the mattress when Minho arches his back a bit. “‘Love this. ‘Love you. Thank you.”
“Don’t thank me, Hyunjin-ah,” Minho murmurs right back, kissing the corner of Hyunjin’s sweet little mouth in the process. “‘Love doing this for you. ‘Love that you trust me to do this. I should thank you.”
“Mm,” Hyunjin hums thoughtfully, already smiling. “Yeah, you probably should.”
Then he laughs, all sparkles and stars and sing-songs, and all Minho can think of to respond with is I love you. I love you, I love you. I love you.
You love me so much, he wants to say, and I love you, too. I love you, too.
(Then Hyunjin kisses him again, and Minho is only human. He forgets.)
***
5
“I can’t believe they wrote a song about cheating.”
It’s been a week since they heard the track Hyunjin is referring to; the one that will be part of their next album and probably performed live once or twice. But Hyunjin is still salty about it, and Minho still finds it absolutely hilarious.
“How dare they?” Minho says, entertaining his sulky boyfriend while he sketches furiously by his little desk and Minho lounges on his own bed next to him, not yet bored of watching.
“It’s gross,” Hyunjin pouts from his skewed angle, eyebrows cutely furrowed. “I feel icky. I don’t wanna say that. I’ve never had feelings for anyone else. No one should have. It’s wrong.”
Startlingly, Minho’s heart expands in his chest. He hasn’t thought of it that much - it’s just lyrics, like most other songs they’ve sung - but… But this is a sore spot for Hyunjin, clearly. His romantic self and generous heart and crystal clear moral stand on relationships won’t stand for a song about cheating, and Minho might just love him all the more for it.
“I’m sure Channie hyung would change the setlist if you explained it to him,” Minho offers. “It could be worth a shot.”
(He’s not actually sure, but it’s possible. If Hyunjin looked at him with those teary puppy eyes and explained he feels icky singing about it, then… Well, Minho’s not sure Chan would be strong enough to turn him down.)
“No,” Hyunjin mutters cutely, sighing deeply until his shoulders sag. “No, it’s already decided. I don’t wanna mess anything up or set us back. I’ll live. Even if I feel gross.”
“‘Guess we’ll be more demanding about occupying the bathroom for a bit then,” Minho replies, to which Hyunjin finally smiles and puts his pencil aside to look back at him. “‘Can’t have you feeling icky and gross, hmm? Seems like your boyfriend should do something about that.”
“Mmm,” Hyunjin hums in agreement. “Yeah, he should. My boyfriend who wouldn’t dare think about cheating because I will murder him if he does.”
The pure thought of it is so bizarre that Minho outright laughs, slumping into his pillow while Hyunjin comes over to climb on top of him until Minho’s laughter is at least fifty per cent huffing due to the weight over his lungs, welcome as it is. Cheat on Hyunjin. Yeah.
Sure.
“How would you murder me?” he asks while Hyunjin grins, elbows and knees bumping into places they shouldn’t because their bunk beds aren’t that large, unfortunately.
“Swiftly,” Hyunjin answers immediately, as if he’s been thinking about it. Minho laughs even harder at the revelation, while Hyunjin seems awfully pleased with himself. “Poison, maybe. A dagger through the heart. You’d know it was me, hyung. You’d know the exact reason you walked into your own fate.”
“Serves me right, I hear,” Minho replies, tracing the shape of Hyunjin’s cheekbone with his knuckles. “I’d want the last thing I see to be you, anyway. It’d be a good way to go.”
“Idiot,” Hyunjin mutters, and then he kisses him, and words are superfluous when Hyunjin’s lips speak sentiments far more powerful than words directly into Minho’s skin, all the way to his lungs.
Minho hasn’t said that he’ll never cheat on Hyunjin, but he sincerely hopes that Hyunjin knows it regardless. He doesn’t think that’s what happened with the guy Hyunjin used to see, but Minho honestly isn’t sure. It could be, even if Hyunjin hasn’t shared that yet. Or he has strong feelings on the morality of cheating either way, of course, Minho probably does too if he were to be placed in such a situation, but…
But he can’t imagine that, to be completely honest. He knows in his bones that he’ll never cheat on Hyunjin, that Minho can’t even picture someone who would be more alluring than the magical being cuddled up to him in this moment. There’s no way. And he’s just about the same amount of certain that Hyunjin won’t put him through that, either.
Maybe he should speak up, actually.
“Baby,” he murmurs, the taste of Hyunjin’s sticky sweet lips still tangible inside Minho’s own mouth. “Hyunjin-ah. You know you’ll never have to worry about that, right?”
“Yeah, I know that,” Hyunjin replies softly, going in for another gentle meeting of damp skin before he retreats to meet Minho’s curious gaze. He looks calm, thankfully. “I know that, hyung. I know you care too much about me. And the group, and our careers, and all the rest. I know that.”
“I do,” Minho agrees, because it’s true. “But even without the rest, Hyunjin, I would never… I wouldn’t put you through that. You’d never do that to me. I’m as sure of my own future actions as I am of yours. I know we haven’t been together like this for very long, but--”
“Minho,” Hyunjin interrupts his little rambling session, lifting Minho’s gaze with a light touch beneath his chin, tilting their faces closer together. “I know that. I didn’t mean to put you on the spot or anything. I’m sorry. I know you love me and I know you have for a long time. You’re not the kind of person who forgets or drops people you care about. I’m not worried. I’m not worried when it comes to you.”
It’s a little overwhelming, Minho must admit. It’s a lot to hear someone talk about him that way, but coming from someone like Hyunjin who values love and thinks so highly of it, and on top of that has known Minho for a good few years - has lived on top of him, basically - it’s a lot. He’s not sure how to respond, but Hyunjin doesn’t seem to expect much. He’s just smiling that easy way that he does; crinkled eyes and little whiskers and soft pull of his lips.
Hyunjin loves him and knows that Minho loves him, too. That’s what he said. He’s not worried, because he understands Minho and knows what to expect and not. Clearly, care is something he expects. Cheating is something he doesn’t.
Minho thinks that’s pretty spot on.
“We’re surrounded by handsome, beautiful, attractive people all day every day,” Hyunjin murmurs, “and yet, whenever I try to sneak a look at you, you’re already watching me. You’re always watching me, hyung. I’ve asked you why me, why now, why no one else, and you told me that you didn’t have any reason to look in anyone’s direction but mine. I believe you. I’ve seen it now. It’s this ‘who would I love when there’s you’ kind of way. It’s all I’ve ever wanted, Minho. And you’re doing it. Please keep doing it.”
“Okay,” Minho manages, sort of staring while Hyunjin smiles fondly down at him. God. “Okay, I’ll… I’ll keep doing it.”
I love you, the voice in his head all but screams, only silencing somewhat when Hyunjin takes his face in both hands and kisses him while Minho feels smaller and more precious than ever before. Because of Hyunjin.
I love you, it echoes faintly, never completely leaving him. You love me and I love you and I love you and I love you and I… I love you too.