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Night fell upon the Isle of Memories, and Sara just couldn't sleep.
Usually she had no problem falling asleep after a long day, but the moonlight tonight was much brighter than usual, and it just so happened to pierce through the hut’s gaps and fall directly over her bed. She was accustomed to sleeping in total darkness, and the sheets were too thin to block the light from her sight.
Ugh. It would be ideal to get a few hours of sleep before she was summoned to forage or craft under the burning sun. She and the others worked very hard every day, and they had done a pretty good job surviving thus far. Recently, under Kai's instructions and division of labor, they had gathered enough materials for their base and managed to build a large hut with several rooms. Each room was shared by two people, and after drawing lots, she had ended up with Sou, much to the latter's dismay. They were ‘roommates’ (Kanna thought that word choice was very important for some reason) in a sense.
Her thoughts wandered to the man himself. Being an only child, sharing a room had been quite an unfamiliar concept for Sara. But Sou had proved himself a decent roommate, and they hadn’t had issues so far. Well… except for minor arguments, mostly revolving around the fact that there were no curtains for privacy, though really Sou was the only one who had a problem with it.
Thanks to the lack of curtains, she could see him from here even now, his messy hair prominent against the lavender sheets as he slept soundly on his back. He was always either frowning or on the verge of passing out, and to see the stress wiped completely from his face, his lips parted as he breathed out puffs of air, was… interesting. Sara propped herself on her elbows and peered over at him. For a moment, she imagined herself walking over, brushing back the bangs that covered half of his face, and –
Sou’s eyes suddenly snapped open.
He’s awake? Sara silently plopped back on the pillow and squeezed her eyes shut. Had he caught her staring? Did she look like a creep to him? Maybe she was, and if he had noticed, that would be the second most embarrassing thing that had ever happened to her on this godforsaken island. She could hear the rustling of sheets as Sou got off the bed. His shadow loomed over her for a second, then retreated quickly as it had appeared.
When the noise subsided, Sara took a peek through the sheets. Sou was holding a basket and a wooden rod, both her own tools she had picked out specifically for foraging. He yanked on his jacket and briskly ventured out into the moonlit night. Sara shot back up as soon as the door clicked shut.
Was Sou really going outside voluntarily? In the middle of the night, all alone and utterly defenseless against the horrors of nature? There was a reason they kept a night curfew. Maybe he was losing it from the lack of nutrition. Knowing Sou, that was the only explanation she could think of. Though their residential zone was bearable now, food was still scarce, and Sara couldn’t even remember the last time she’d seen him eat or drink. Either way, she just had to find out what the heck was going on with her roommate. It was her responsibility, after all.
As she crawled out of bed, she almost tripped over something. Sou’s spotted scarf lay carelessly on the floor. She picked it up and experimentally wrapped it around her neck. The distant scent of his shampoo wafted from the cloth, and oddly enough, she could catch a whiff of her own strawberry hand cream. The fabric was so soft and warm that it made the awful color coordination almost forgivable: she could see why Sou liked it so much. She decided to bring it with her.
When she exited the hut, she could see a slouched figure walking aimlessly, casting a long shadow across the moonlit shore. Sou was poking at some empty seashells with the rod, almost looking unsure of himself.
“Sou!” Sara called out. He visibly jumped before hastily turning to meet her.
“Miss Sara…” Sou quickly straightened his poor posture. “Were you pretending to sleep?” An accusatory tone bled into his words.
“Well, yes.” Sara said, tilting her head. “I was wondering why you were awake at this hour.”
“Why are you wearing my scarf?” he asked, bewildered.
“It’s cold outside, and it’s only fair that I take some of your stuff, too.” Sara pointed to where he was awkwardly holding the tools behind his back. “What are you going to do with them, Sou? And where are you going at this hour?”
“Ahaha, no need to be such a stuck-up. I'm simply taking a walk. The night breeze is pleasant, for sure. It’s hard to enjoy such a fine beach when we’re trying to survive the day.” Without his scarf, Sou’s nervous fiddling had transferred to the edges of his sleeve, and she could tell he was definitely lying.
“Did you forget about the night curfew? There could be monsters roaming around.” she pointed out.
“Well, I am a certified fighter according to Kai. Which makes me perfectly capable of protecting myself.” The hint of sarcasm wasn’t lost on her. Sara grimaced as she recalled the day Kai instructed him to train with Q-taro and Keiji, utterly deadpan. She could imagine how traumatizing the experience had been for him. Sou noticed her change in expression and swung the rod twice, and she didn’t have to be a kendo master to say that it was most certainly a pathetic display.
Sara rolled her eyes. “Come on. We both know that he can make some questionable judgments sometimes.” As if Sou wasn’t mumbling complaints every single day. “Also, I know he asked you specifically to rest indoors for today.”
“Listen…” Sou finally gave in, letting out a long sigh. “I was just trying to get some food for Kanna, okay?”
“Kanna?”
“Yeah. You may not have noticed, Miss Sara…” He paused for emphasis. “..but I have. She’s overexerting herself, trying to nurse me and the others when she's just begun to recover herself. And even worse, Kai and the others are encouraging it. I caught her offering her dish to Gin today! Do you have any idea how long she’s gone on without a single portion? At this rate, she’s going to make herself sick. I don’t know why Kanna’s being so stubborn about this, but I’m definitely having her eat something today.” Sou looked frustrated and somewhat angry, but a determined glint shone in his eyes.
That… was very nice of Kanna. And of Sou, too. In truth, Sara hadn’t noticed anything off with Kanna, even as they’d exchanged farewells just a few hours ago. A twinge of guilt gnawed at her heart. She had heard that Kanna had politely refused yesterday’s food distribution as well, so Sou’s concern was well founded. However…
“Come to think of it, Sou, have you ever foraged before? It’ll be hard for you to catch anything on your first time. I’ll talk to Kanna tomorrow, so can I tag along with you for now?”
“Huh? So you aren’t going to tell Kai?” Genuine surprise was evident in his tone. Did she really look like some kind of snitch to him?
“Of course! I’ll help you. In the meantime, let’s get you some food, too.” She could swear he was getting even skinnier by the day.
Sou shook his head. “Oh, me? I’m fine. I can survive without food for days on my own. That’s my special perk, you see.”
So he was starving too? Now Sara even felt guiltier, knowing that Kai made sure she was fed at least every two days. “What do you mean by that?”
“Ahaha, it’s nothing. So, uh…” Sou meekly handed her the basket. “Where do you think we should start?”
He really didn’t know a thing, huh? Sara suppressed a smile and grabbed him by the hand. Sou flinched slightly, but voiced no complaints as she took him deeper into the jungle.
At least Sou wasn’t kidding when he said the night breeze was pleasant. The soft, crisp wind ruffled their hair, and she felt strangely giddy as they ventured towards the heart of the island together. With everyone else sound asleep in their rooms, this little excursion between the two of them felt both wrong and exciting, like they were partners in crime. The island was beautiful at night, and somewhat foreign, but she could navigate easily thanks to the moonlight.
Sou stumbled over a loose vine. She acted quickly, and grabbed him just as he lost his balance.
“Ugh…Thanks for that. This path… it’s so damn tricky.”
“Be careful. It’ll be bad if you get hurt and I have to give you a piggyback ride all the way to base. You can keep holding onto me, if you want.” she teased.
A challenging grin tugged at his lips. “I doubt even you're that strong, Miss Sara.”
“Oh? Are you sure about that?” She crouched, putting one hand on his shoulder and the other on the back of his thighs, and quickly scooped him up in a bridal carry before he could react. Sou yelped ungracefully and squirmed in her grasp. The mini power trip didn't last long, and she put him back down as gently as possible.
Sou brushed his shirt. "Sheesh… you didn't have to go ahead and prove it." He looked noticeably flustered, and Sara felt a smile creep onto her face.
“You're surprisingly light, Sou. Maybe I should tuck you like this in bed every day, whenever you refuse to sleep.”
“Maybe you sleep too early. Seriously, who goes to bed at ten? What are you, a grade schooler?” Sou retorted, quite not meeting her eyes.
“That's why you're always irritable during the day. It's not our fault coffee beans don't grow here.”
“Just in case you’ve forgotten, Miss Sara, we have a clear reason to be awake now. Let's get started already.”
“Of course. We’re almost there.” Soft grass brushed against their feet, and soon enough, they’d arrived at the harvesting grounds.
“See here.” Sara pointed at a batch of small plants beneath them. “This is called a Wild Chicory.” She crouched, Sou following her lead. “Kai told us which plants are edible, so we must be careful not to pick out the poisonous ones.”
“I see.” He plucked out the stem and sniffed it suspiciously. “I don’t remember eating anything like this…”
Sara shrugged. “Who knows? Kai’s cooking works in mysterious ways.”
For a while, she led him through the various plants and berries, occasionally moving from place to place. It was more slow-paced than her regular foraging routine, as she gave Sou descriptions of what was safe and unsafe to pick. It was fun, and even relaxing. Sou was a quick learner, and soon enough, their basket was half full, way past a single portion. He had a knack for this. Maybe she could convince Kai to let Sou forage with her from now on.
“I think that’s enough.” Sara announced, getting up and stretching her back. On a tree high above, she noticed a coconut dangling temptingly, and an idea crossed her mind.
“Say, Sou, what do you think about getting that coconut?” Sara pointed towards the tree.
“That’s pretty high up.” Sou looked up, squinting. “Even with the pole, I don’t think we can reach it.”
“Well, normally we have Alice to help with that, but since we’re both pretty short… Sou, would you sit on my shoulders? You can hold the rod and get it.”
“Huh? Are you sure?”
“I mean, we could always do it the other way around. If our ‘certified fighter’ insists, I can-”
“That’s fine with me.” Sou said quickly. Sara nodded as she separated the wood covering the end of the rod, revealing a sharp blade.
Sou hesitantly took the rod. “That looks dangerous…”
“You’ll be fine. Just be careful not to drop it.” Sara walked towards the palm tree. “Over here!” she called.
Sara crouched down to let Sou slip his legs between her shoulders. She placed her hands on the tree for balance as she slowly rose into a standing position. It was hard to look up from here, but she could feel Sou hooking the blade against the branch. He struggled as the coconut swung just out of reach, and Sara moved a few steps to the right, knees wobbling. Sou prodded the branch, and after a few more hits, a loud thud rang beneath her. Sara slowly crouched back down, staying in position until Sou completely got off her shoulders. He was out of breath, as if he’d been sprinting, but his eyes shone in victory.
“We did it! High five!” Sara beamed, holding out her palm.
“Yeah!” Sou high-fived her back, then awkwardly retracted his hand. “I mean, we should see if it's good enough to eat first.”
Sara retrieved the coconut, relieved to see it was in good shape. Sou inspected it, and she had to wonder if this was really his first time seeing one. He still looked like he needed a rest, so Sara sat down on the grass. Sou did too, cradling the fruit close to him like a prize.
“You must be hungry, Sou. Here, I’ll crack it open for you.” she offered.
Sou shook his head. “Like I said, I’m fine.” His words came out carefully, and Sara wondered if he still held a grudge against her. It was true that he was rarely in the spotlight, and it didn’t help that he prioritized Kanna’s well being over his own. Worry washed over her; as aloof and independent as he made himself look, Sou clearly wasn’t doing a good job taking care of himself.
Her musings were interrupted by Sou’s voice. “What do you think about our life here?” Sou was slouched over his knees, resting his head on his arms. “Kidnapped on a bizarre island, where our only purpose is to survive under a communal life… don’t you think it’s strange?” he asked, inclining his head closer towards her.
“I know it’s unexpected, but minus the survival aspect, I think it's pretty fun. School life is pretty mundane, and Joe always said he wanted to go on an island vacation.” Sara said truthfully. Mishima was helping her with her schoolwork, and a life filled with changes and new challenges was something she’d always secretly wanted anyway.
Sou sighed, looking down. “That's easy for you to say, Miss Sara. I'd say a mundane life is better than risking death. Aren’t you worried about what will happen after thirty days? I don’t trust our kidnappers to let us go without any consequences.”
He did have a point. “I’m not sure about that either… But if they were going to harm us, I don’t see why they haven’t done it sooner. If anything bad happens, I believe we can stand a chance against whatever they will bring upon us.”
“You’re overestimating us as a group. We’re barely sustaining ourselves, and once food grows scarce, the weaker ones will be the first to drop out.” Sou folded his arms, but the way he gripped his jacket made it look as though he was hugging himself.
Sara was taken aback by how pessimistic he was. Was this how he’d seen their predicament all this time? No wonder he seemed to be on edge all the time. She clasped Sou’s hands and held them tight. “Sou… I’ll make sure that never happens.” she said firmly.
Sou’s eyes widened, surprised by either her words or her boldness, and Sara continued, “I know we weren’t the best at managing things in the beginning, and I apologize for that. But no one here is malicious enough to let others starve to death. Also, things aren’t as bleak as they seem.”
“How can you be so sure?” he asked, genuine curiosity in his tone.
“Now that we have a home, we'll focus our efforts on gathering instead. The same goes for you, too. If I show Kai the coconut you got on your first try, he'll have no choice but to assign you to foraging! There will definitely be more food.”
“Ahaha…” Sou’s shaky chuckles rang out before falling silent as he looked down at the coconut. For a moment, Sara was worried that she had said something wrong. Then he raised his chin. “Was that why you insisted on getting this? The coconut, I mean.”
“Yes.” And I wanted to spend more time with you , she didn’t say. “Also, coconuts are highly nutritious and good for a growing child like Kanna. Plants won’t cut it.”
“You’re right. That’s quite considerate, coming from you. And I was wondering if your fruit-loving tendencies knew no limits.” Sou sounded more relaxed now, but Sara saw a shiver go down his spine. She immediately shed her thick, comfortable scarf to wrap it around his neck, and he tensed up as she looped the rest to fasten it tight. “I’ll always look out for you both. You know that, right? So please don’t worry, Sou. It’ll get better.” she said.
“Well, I… I appreciate the sentiment. Miss Sara.” he said, burying his head into the scarf and relishing in the transferred heat. His shoulders sagged as he stretched his legs across the grass.
From there, they talked about future survival strategies. Sara told him everything she knew about Kai’s management plans, and Sou slipped in his take on each matter. It was surprising how insightful he could be. When she felt braver, she asked questions about details of his personal life; Sara could tell that he didn’t have the highest self-esteem, so she mostly complimented his cooler side (who knew he was a skilled programmer at such a young age?) and tried not to be intrusive.
The air around felt a bit warmer as they eventually came to a comfortable silence. The haze of shadow that hung over the night was dissipating, leaving the scenery around them a brighter shade. Sara looked up to see the full moon escaping the dark edges of a cloud.
“Look over there. Isn’t the moon so beautiful tonight?” Sara’s pointed hand paused midair, lowkey panicking at the unintended implication, but Sou didn’t seem to catch it at all as he glanced up to the sky.
“It sure is. Shame we don't have a camera to take a picture.” he said.
Come to think of it, it was getting close to that time of year – the lunar festival. But for some reason, she wasn’t upset that she wasn’t spending this night with her family. “Just seeing it is enough. I like moon-viewing, especially if it’s a harvest moon like today. There's something special about a singular brightness illuminating a clear sky like this. The rays are much softer and pleasant compared to the blinding sunlight.” she said.
“Moonlight is just reflected sunlight, you know…” Sou trailed off, looking distracted. Sara huffed, poking him lightly.
“Oh shut up, Sou… You're just uncultured. Even if its light is reflected from the sun, the moon is beautiful by itself, all the same.” Sara stared wistfully into the distance. She wondered if her parents and Ryoko were close enough to the island to see this, too.
Sou grew silent, pensively staring at the full moon before them, and Sara quickly realized that the side view was worth admiring as well. Sou’s teal hair was awash with moonlight, and his eyes, normally shadowed under his bangs, shone a brighter shade of blue and twinkled like the night sky reflected off of the ocean. He was really far too pretty for his own good, wasn’t he? His lips were pursed together in deep thought, and Sara couldn’t help wondering what was in his mind right now.
The soft wind whipped his hair, brushing the loose strands back, and the giddiness she felt earlier welled over, sending flutters through her chest. What a night it was. It was so tempting to forget all the problems with hunger and survival, and simply enjoy the moment. She hoped Sou could be free of his worries, at least when they were sitting here under the stars together. A bittersweet pang struck her as she realized that a time like this would never come again. There were just fifteen days left before their deadline. It felt short-lived, just like the full moon starting to wane as soon as the night passed.
Just as she was lost in thought, she found herself blinking back at Sou's blue gaze, now firmly locked onto her.
Sara suddenly felt hyperaware of her own dopey expression. She quickly came back to her senses and willed herself not to flinch away, but her face heated up nevertheless. This time, she’d actually been caught staring like a creep. But instead of reprimanding her, or even making a sly comment, he shyly turned away from her, cheeks tinged pink. They both went back to wordlessly looking up at the sky.
Sou decided to break the silence first. “Miss Sara, I…” He fidgeted in place, sounding uncharacteristically nervous.
“Thanks for coming with me today, and… I just wanted to say,” Sara held her breath, not daring to interrupt him. “That I have a confession to make.”
Had she heard that right? A confession? Was he really? Right here, in the most beautiful place on the island? Surely not, but…
“You're going to confess to me, Sou?” she teased, trying to ease the tension. His cheeks colored a deeper shade.
“No! It’s nothing like that.” Sou tugged on his scarf. “The thing is, my real name… isn’t Sou Hiyori.”
Sara blinked. “Huh? What is it, then?”
“It’s Shin Tsukimi. My given name.”
Sara's brain was lagging far back. She thought about accusing him of joking, but his expression was way too sincere. “Tsukimi? Like the moon? That’s awfully coincidental.”
“It’s true...” He sounded like he was holding back a pout, and Sara held back a chuckle.
“I believe you. Why did you hide such a pretty name?” Shin Tsukimi. She internally repeated the name over and over again, trying to match it to the man standing in front of her.
“Pretty? Uh, I mean… I was just being cautious. Since we were strangers and all. I don't know what overcame me, but I blurted out someone else’s name. Only Kanna knows, and it'll be awkward to tell everyone that now. Will you keep it a secret?” The words poured out almost pleadingly, even though he had been the one who had decided to share it with her.
“Of course. You’re so wary, Sou… I mean, Shin. But thanks for trusting me. I really appreciate it.” Sara assured him. The more she said his name, the more she thought it was cute and fitting. He was genuinely opening up to her. A warm feeling burst into her chest.
It felt very gratifying, to gain trust from a secretive person like Shin. As though she had managed to disentangle ties from a distant past, no matter how weird that sounded.
“Though… he’s nothing like the sun.” Shin mumbled under his breath.
Sara blinked. “What was that?”
“Oh, nothing, Miss Sara.” Shin looked up.
“Anyways, it's okay for me to call you Shin when we're alone, right?”
“Right.” Shin cleared his throat, composing himself. “Again, don’t tell anyone… I know where you sleep, you know.” His tone was a mix between serious and joking, earning him a laugh from her. She made a mental note to call him Shin at every given chance.
“Let’s go back now.” Shin said, and they went back to their hut, their basket filled with food and a content smile on their faces.
“I’ll ask Kai to cook these in the morning.” she said, placing the basket on the table. “We should really get back to sleep.”
Shin yawned in response, flopping onto the bed. “Good night…. Sara.” he called out.
“Good night, Shin.” Sleep didn't come to her easily: she was so wound up with excitement that her heartbeat was pounding in her ears. Maybe losing sleep every now and then wasn't so bad.
He was her dear little secret, one she would cherish with all her heart.