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Pat and Pran met through a mutual friend in university three years ago. Pran was in first year and Pat was in his last year of Bachelor’s Degree. Pran shared a dorm with someone random called Wai, who is in his final year. Luckily enough, they were from the same faculty, so they became close and get on well. Pat and Pran had been introduced to each other when Wai invited Pran for a night out at a club near campus. Wai introduced Korn to Pran. Korn and Wai had been close since their first, despite being in different faculties. Wai and Korn had few other friends around the table as well, but Pran couldn’t bother to memorise their names. The table suddenly erupted with whistling sound coming from Wai and Korn, cheering on someone who was approaching their table. Pran could see that person had insane nicely built figure, tiny waist and just enough muscles on his upper body, dressed up in sheer buttoned-down blouse exposing his toned torso and tight black trousers, and hair perfectly styled yet a good kind of messy. This must be Pat Napat that Wai kept talking about. Wai had introduced Pat and Pran to each other. Pat kept his eyes on Pran as Wai was introducing them, with a twinkle in his eyes. Pran noticed it and flustered at the eye contact.
The night went on and Pat and Pran kept talking (and flirting) all night. The rest of the table noticed the atmosphere between the two, but didn’t mention anything about it. They exchanged numbers before calling it a night and parted ways. If Pran was feeling giddy all the way home and dreamt of Pat that night, no one had to know.
They went on for several dates after that. Pat initiated it, of course, which Pran agreed easily. Dates with Pat felt like a dream. Pat always planned and surprised Pran the most romantic places. Like picnic in the park watching as the sun set on the horizon, dinner on a cruise, or that time when Pat surprisingly took Pran to Chiang Mai by plane, for a quick lunch because Pran had mentioned how he craved a specific traditional dish from the north.
See, the thing is, Pat comes from a wealthy family. His dad owns a car workshop that has a huge reputation in Southeast Asia. His mom is a known dentist and owns few dental clinics around Bangkok. So, money has never been a problem for Pat. But sometimes, Pran feels guilty when Pat spends unnecessary money on him. Pran himself comes from an average family. Pran is an only child. His dad died when Pran was only 11 years old. His mom is a nurse staff and constantly working late shift to feed him. So, when he was offered a scholarship at one of the top University in Bangkok, he couldn’t miss that chance. When he met Pat, he was not used to being lavished with money and expensive presents, yet Pat insisted. Who is Pran to refuse?
After the fourth date, Pat asked Pran to be his boyfriend, Pran didn’t hesitate to say yes. Two months into the relationship, Pat completed his studies and worked with his father at the headquarters. Luckily, the office was in Bangkok, so they are still able to meet each other every day. Pat rented a luxury and spacious apartment in the middle of Bangkok, not wanting to live with his family because I needed privacy and be a proper adult, Pat reasoned.
Five months later, Pat insisted Pran in moving in with him into his apartment. Pran was hesitant because what would Pat’s family think? After few tries, Pran gave up and ended up moving in with Pat. Luckily, the tranportation system in Bangkok was accesible for Pran to travel between his campus and Pat’s apartment easily. Wai and Korn were skeptical and not liking how fast Pat and Pran’s relationship was developing. Pran was still in uni, he had many things to figure out.
Pran first noticed Pat’s controlling behaviour when they were at a club with all their friends, Wai and Korn included. Pran excused himself to the toilet and made his way through dancing bodies on the dance floor. As he reached the toilet, someone stopped him to ask if he could borrow a phone real quick to make a call because his phone died. Pran gave his phone to the stranger as he made a call. After the stranger was done, he passed the phone back to Pran, smiling and thanking Pran for the help, touching Pran’s shoulder as a courtesy gesture. Pran didn’t think anything of it and returned the smile. Suddenly, a strong and familiar hand pulled his upper arm away from the stranger. It was Pat.
“What’s going on here, baby?”, Pat asked in a sweet, yet hard voice. His hand still gripping Pran’s right arm that would surely leave bruises.
“U-uh. Oh this guy needed to borrow my phone to make a call. That’s all”, Pran answers truthfully.
Pat was skeptical about the scene in front of him. But he let go of Pran and nodded in understanding. The stranger already walked away awkwardly. Pran looked up to Pat and studied his face.
“What’s up, Pat? What was that for? My arm hurts now,” Pran said, lips pouting.
“It’s nothing. I don’t want you talking to any guys in here. I don’t trust them”, Pat warned. That should have been a first red flag, but instead, Pran felt butterflies in his stomach because Pat’s jealousy made him feel safe.
^^
The first time Pat accidentally hit Pran was when Pran about to leave their apartment to meet with some of his friends. He didn’t bother asking permission because why should he? It was 7 at night, Pat had just entered the door of the apartment and saw Pran was all dressed up and ready to leave. Unknown to Pran, Pat had a bad day at the office because his dad was disappointed with his performance. His head was already filled with anger, then he had to come home seeing his boyfriend looking nice to have a night out, probably chatting up some guys later. Pat saw red. He was fuming.
“Where do you think you’re going?”, Pat starts, voice stern.
“Oh, hey babe. I’m going out for a bit with my friends from uni. I’ll be back before 11”, Pran said bubbly, unaware of Pat’s mood.
“And you’re only telling me now? I’m your boyfriend, Pran. Should’ve told me earlier”, Pat mutters in a low tone, trying to calm himself.
“Oh, come on, Pat. I go out all the time. What’s wrong with you today?”, Pran joked, but Pat’s anger was only growing by the seconds.
Pat gripped Pran’s arm and shoved him into the wall behind Pran, making him stumbled. Pran was taken aback by the whole situation and anger took over Pran’s mind.
“What the fuck is wrong with you, Pat?! That fucking hurts”, Pran screamed at Pat.
“I came home all stressed out from work, just to feed us two, to get you through uni, yet you are having fun out there, not bothering to please me. You’re so fucking ungrateful, Pran. The least you could do is prioritise me before anyone else. But you can’t even do that!”, Pat snarled, both hands holding Pran still, nose scrunched from his anger.
“What the fuck are you talking about, Pat?! You were the one who insisted on me moving in with you! Now, you’re blaming me? Fine, I’ll move out tonight if you feel like I’m a burden to you”, Pran said, walking towards his room and taking out his luggage.
“Pran! Don’t you fucking dare step out of this house! Where would you go, huh? You can’t afford the dorm on campus, and your mother is struggling with money herself. You’ve been relying on me all this time”, Pat said smugly. A flash of hurt crossed Pran’s face.
“Fuck you, Pat! I am not a fucking charity case! Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you!”, Pran chanted, fists hitting Pat’s chest repeatedly, but Pat wasn’t fazed by Pran’s weak punches.
Pat lost his patience for the first time when Pran was still screaming and cursing him. Pran’s outburst was interrupted by a firm slap to his face, Pat’s palm connecting with Pran’s left cheek. A loud smack filled the room. Then, silence.
Pran was stunned, mouth open in shock as he tried to process what happened. Pat hit him. Pran cupped his own cheek and looked up to Pat, in which the latter looked like he had just murdered someone.
Pat closed the distance between them and tried to reach out for Pran’s face, but Pran flinched at the movement.
“Don’t touch me! Leave me alone, Pat”, Pran said, hurt in voice.
Pran then left the room and went into the other bedroom and locked himself in there, not wanting to face Pat at the moment. He took out his phone and texted his friends that he could not join them tonight.
Few minutes later, he heard Pat knocking softly on the locked door.
“Pran, baby. Open up please. Let me apologize to you. Pran, hear me out, please, baby”, Pat pleaded, regret in his voice.
Pran stayed silent for another 5 minutes while Pat kept knocking and coaxing him to unlock the door. Pran couldn’t be mad at Pat for too long. That was his weakness. Damn Pat.
Pran unlocked the door to see Pat sitting on the floor with his head in his hands and pulling his hair. He felt guilty looking at his boyfriend’s state.
Pat got up when the door opened and followed Pran onto the bed like a lost puppy.
“Pran, baby. Let me see your cheek, please”, Pat said softly. Pran melted immediately into his touch.
His tender cheek was still pinkish from the slap. Pat grimaced seeing how Pran hissed when he touched his cheek. Pran could see Pat’s eyes were filled with regret.
“Baby, I’m sorry, believe me please. What I did was terrible and you shouldn’t forgive me, but I really am sorry for hurting you like that. I love you so much, I promised myself I would take care of you, yet I was the one who hurt you. I’m sorry, baby. Please don’t leave me, Pran”, Pat sounded remorseful and full of sincerity. Pran stared at Pat’s face and reminisced all the good times they had together.
Pran took a minute to respond. “I’m hurt, Pat. I never thought you would get violent physically with me. But it was partly my fault. I provoked you when I knew you were having a bad day. I forgive you. Please don’t ever do it again, Pat”, Pran said sadly, hands reaching out to Pat’s to assure him he was fine.
“Of course, baby. I promise, I won’t. I love you”, Pat assured Pran.
“I love you too, baby”, Pran replied smiling, not quite reaching his eyes. Pushing away thoughts and voices in the back of his head wanting to get away from his boyfriend who had just hurt him.
The second time it happened was during Pran’s second year in uni. Pran noticed Pat became overly jealous. He would get jealous of Wai whenever he would come over when Pat was not home. Pat knew Wai was Pran’s closest friend, so Pran didn’t think Pat would mind, right? He came over occasionally and Pat knew. But this time Pran forgot to inform Pat on their visitor.
Wai had come over unannouced, surprising Pran too. Apparently Wai had a business meeting near the apartment and decided to drop by. It was pouring rain outside and Wai was soaked. Pran offered Wai to take a shower and put his soaked clothes into the tumble dryer while waiting for the weather to subside. Pran went to the kitchen to make them some hot drinks while Wai was taking a shower. When Wai came out of the bathroom with only towel draped around his waist, Pat came through and entered the apartment. He was shocked seeing Wai half naked in his apartment. Then, Pran also entered the living room, with no shirt on because he accidentally splashed the drinks on his shirt. Surprised that his boyfriend came home earlier than he usually did.
“Oh, Pat. You’re home early”, Pran beamed innocently at his boyfriend’s presence.
“Wai here caught up in the rain so I offered him to shower”, Pran explained, gesturing his hand to Wai.
“Hey, Pat. Nice to see you, mate. How was work?”, Wai tried to make a small talk, but Pat only nodded half-heartedly. Pat made his way to the bedroom and shut the door.
Wai and Pran were puzzled and did not dare to question it. Pran handed Wai his dried clothes. 10 minutes later, the rain had stopped, so Wai excused himself and thanked Pran.
Once his friend left, Pran wandered to the bedroom he shared with Pat. Knocking silently before opening the door. The room was dark, then suddenly two hands were gripping his arms and shoved him into the wall.
“What the fuck was that, Pran?! Did you cheat on me with Wai?! In my own apartment, Pran. For God’s sake. You’re disgusting!”, Pat snarled at Pran.
“I came home early today to spend the evening with you, yet I had to witness you and your fling half naked in my apartment! What the fuck?!”, Pat seethed in anger, his right fist colliding with the wall next to Pran’s head. Pran felt terrified of Pat. He thought Pat was going to hit him so he covered his face instinctively.
“Look at me, Pran”, Pat warned.
When Pran didn’t listen, Pat forcefully grabbed Pran by the hair and slapped his boyfriend’s face with so much force, harder than the first time. Pran felt tears started welling up. He was trembling in fear as he looked up to his boyfriend’s eyes. No signs of regret or remorse like the first time Pat slapped him.
“P-pat, it hurts. Let me go, p-please”, Pran raised his hand to where Pat’s hand was pulling his hair, in hopes his boyfriend would release the painful grip. Pat ignored his pleas.
“No, Pran. Listen to me. I won’t allow you to bring anyone to this apartment anymore, not even Korn and Wai, especially Wai. God knows how many times you two have fucked behind my back. Fuck, Pran! Why do you have to push my limits like this? I love you, you know that right?”, Pat finishes in a sweet voice, the grip on Pran’s hair tightened.
Pran still had tears streaming down his reddened cheeks. To say he was scared was understatement. He wanted to say how wrong Pat was, that he was misunderstanding the whole thing. But Pran couldn’t answer, couldn’t move, couldn’t form a coherent sentence.
When Pat didn’t get any response from Pran, his fury unfolded again.
“You’re gonna be a bitch, huh, Pran?!”, Pat said as he raised his clenched fist and threw a punch to Pran’s cheek. Then, came the second and third blows. Pran lost count as his head became clouded and he thought he might lose conciousness in seconds. But then Pat stopped. Pran realized he was on the floor now. He must have fallen when Pat was attacking him.
He could no longer felt Pat’s hands on his body. Pat must have left the apartment because he could hear the sound of the front door slamming shut.
Pran laid there for another 10 minutes, sobbing loudly as he processed what just happened. His sweet, loving boyfriend hit him. Pran never liked violence. But now, the person he loved the most hurt him. He cried harder as he tried to move. His head hurt from all the beatings.
He gathered all his strengths and stood up to walk to the bathroom. His sobs filled the room as he looked at his face in the mirror. Blood spots were all over his face and bruises were starting to form.
He took a cloth from the cabinet and wiped off the blood gently, wincing as he cleaned the cuts, probably from Pat’s rings.
When he was done, he laid down on the spare bedroom in the apartment, in attempt to avoid Pat when he’d come home later. Pran fell asleep within minutes because his energy was drained.
He woke up two hours later when he felt the end of the bed dipped, indicating someone sat on it. Pat. Pran crawled away from Pat and hugged his knees and his body began trembling in fear.
Pat stretched his hand to lift up Pran’s chin. Pat had expected Pran would flinch. He brushed it off. Pat inspected Pran’s face and saw the damage he had done to his lover. Regret crossed his eyes, but only for a minute, because he felt Pran deserved it when he remembered how Pran tried to cheat on him. Deep down Pat knew Pran wouldn’t do that to him, but he hated seeing Pran close with anyone else other than him. He had to be in control.
“Baby, you know I did that for your own good, right? Hm?”, Pat asked, voice cold.
Honestly, Pran wanted to argue, because no, you don’t hit people you love, right? But he didn’t want to get hurt again. So instead of disagreeing, Pran nodded half-heartedly, tears forming in his eyes.
Pat smiled sadly. “Good boy. Here, I bought some remedy cream for your wounds and bruises” Pat applied the cream gently as Pran held back his tears.
^^
That was a year ago. Some might think Pat would stop the abuse at that. Absolutely wrong. Things are the still same, if not worse. Every now and then, Pat would lose his temper on the littlest mistakes and takes it out on Pran. For example, if Pran forgets to do the chores, Pat would push him against the wall and strikes a slap across his face or chokes his throat until his gasps for air. Pran cowers in fear and starts mumbling apologies. It has become a routine and habit for Pran, really.
His student life becomes sour too. Gradually, he lost some of his friends because Pat threathened to hurt him if he refused to cut off all contacts with them. Luckily enough, Pat lets him finishes his studies. Pran is grateful, because his degree means the world to him. He cannot possibly forgo the scholarship just like that.
The only friends Pran has now are Korn, Wai, Mo, Chang, Louis, and Safe, who are Pat’s friends. Pran is only allowed to be friends with them. Although for the past year, Pran grew distant from them because of Pat’s possessiveness since that incident with Wai. Pat usually leaves Pran at home whenever he goes with his friends. If Pat is in a good mood, he would bring Pran along, making sure the bruises he left on Pran remain hidden from his friends. Pat even buys make-up for Pran to cover up his abuse.
No one suspects a thing because Pran always puts on his acting skill and pretends everything is fine. But when they are behind closed door, God only knows how much pain Pran is in. Sometimes Pran wonders when will the abuse end. He wishes Pat would have mercy on him. Pran has tried talking into Pat how he is abusing him and he doesn’t want to be a punching bag anymore. Pat misunderstood it and thought Pran was leaving him. The conversation ended with two punches on Pran’s face and one too many kicks on his stomach. Safe to say, Pran never tried having that conversation again.
^^
It has been a quiet and calm Saturday for both of them. Pat decided to stay at home watching television, meanwhile Pran is concentrating on his final year thesis in their shared room. Pat calls out to Pran, asking him to join him on the couch. Pran obeys like he always does, abandoning his incomplete thesis. Pran loves days like this. They are cuddling on the couch watching a newly released rom-com on Netflix and everything feels in place. Pran never wants this to end. He turns his head to his left to observe his lover’s side profile. Pat looks so soft, so innocent, no hint of a violent person. He’s reminded of the Pat he fell in love with over two years ago. Gentle and loving Pat. He doesn’t know what changed Pat into the violent person he is today. But Pran knows he loves him very much. He cannot imagine not having Pat in his life.
Pran doesn’t realize he was staring and smiling until Pat turns his head to look at Pran.
“What?”, Pat asks, voice cold with a hint of amusement.
“N-nothing. I love this. I love cuddling with you. I-i love you”, Pran says in a small voice.
Pat softens at his lover’s confession. Truthfully, he loves it too. He misses the days when he didn’t resort to violence and abuse Pran. He wants to go back to the days where he always lavished Pran with affection. He knows Pran misses it too. He doesn’t know how he became this monster. He knows he’s hurting his boyfriend, but most times, he is unable to control his anger outbursts. But right now, he has his lover in his arms, he is determined to make this moment happy for Pran. Pat is trying his best to control himself, hoping nothing will trigger his emotions.
“I love you too, baby. I’m so lucky to have you. I’m sorry I put you through all the things I did to you”, Pat tries to apologize, but it sounds awkward. Pran smiles at his boyfriend’s apology. Because Pat rarely apologizes. Pran nods, unsure what to say. He doesn’t want to say something that might trigger Pat.
“Pran, baby. I-i have something to say”, Pat stutters. Pran is surprised because his boyfriend is nervous. What is Pat going to say? Is he breaking up with Pran? Pran panics slightly, yet he listens attentively.
“You know how I always get physical with you, right? I realize how you’re hurt all the time from the punches and kicks. Honestly, Pran. I have no idea why I did what I did. I wanted to stop, but my violent tendencies always won eventually. I don’t know how to put a stop to all these”, Pat says, exasperated.
“Um, Pat. Thank you for apologizing. I know you’re trying your best. I can see it in your eyes. Just know that I will always be by your side, okay? Do you want my help in this? I promise I’ll be with you every step of the way”, Pran assures.
Pat doesn’t need Pran’s advice, but he wants to make himself better. So, he takes the chance.
They go on about Pat’s issue, searching on online articles, the possible cause of it and how to control himself. They decide it’s best if Pat consults a therapist.
A week later Pat has his first appointment with the therapist, which Pran helped in making an appointment. Pran sits outside the consultation room nervously. When Pat’s session is done, Pat walks out with stony face. Pran is not liking this. Is this a mistake?
“Hey, babe. How did it go?”, Pran tries to ask cheerfully in hopes to light up the mood.
Pat remains silent and they walk to the car without saying a word. Once seated in the car, Pat calmly says, “It was fine, I guess. He asked too many questions. It made me realize how terrible I am. How did you put up with me, Pran? I don’t deserve you”, he says softly.
Pran is taken aback.
“Pat. Do not say that, please. You’re not terrible. You were just caught up with your emotions. Plus, I love you for who you are. I chose to be with you”, Pran says, taking Pat’s hand into his. He can tell Pat is battling with emotions right now. At least there is no outburst, Pran is relieved.
^^
Pat continues going to therapy sessions and consultations without a fail for the next six weeks. Pran is very proud of his lover. The violence had stopped completely since that day on the couch. Pran finally can breathe and let his guard down around Pat now. Pat practices the methods to overcome his temper as suggested by his therapist, with the help of Pran, of course.
^^
Pat and Pran are lounging on the couch when Pat receives a text message from Korn, inviting both him and Pran for a night out at the club they always go to. They both agree, although Pat is reluctant at first. But Pran convinces that they should have some fun once in awhile.
When they arrive at the club, there are mass bodies of people on the dance floor. Pat and Pran walked through the crowd, Pat holding Pran close and tight to his side. Pran wants to say how his wrist is hurting from Pat’s grip, but he doesn’t want to risk ruining the night.
They finally reach their friends at the table and greet each of them. Drinks are ready on the table for all of them. Pat pulls Pran’s chair near to him. Pran doesn’t mind. The night is going well for Pat and Pran. They dance and drink, although Pran tries to keep it at minimum because someone has to be responsible. Pat is tipsy now, and tipsy Pat is always touchy. He is clinging onto Pran on the dance floor. Pran’s back to Pat’s front, just swaying side to side while watching Korn and Wai's embarassing moves. Pran decides it is time for them to call it a night because Pat is getting more drunk with each passing minute. Pran leads Pat back to their table because he needs to run to the toilet real quick before leaving the club. He informs Pat, but he’s not sure if Pat can understand him in that state. He quickly runs to the toilet and into the cubicle. As he is walking out of the cubicle, he sees a man in his 30s by the sink. Pran doesn’t think much of it. He washes his hand and heads towards the door. But the stranger stops him in his track, holding out his hand, blocking Pran from walking out. Pran is confused and takes a step back. He looks around and realizes no one else is in the toilet. He wishes someone would come in at this moment.
“W-what are you doing, sir?”, Pran asks politely, fear in his voice.
The man smirks and takes a few steps forward, closing the distance between them. Pran’s back hits the wall and he has nowhere to run now.
“I’ve been watching you all night, princess. Look at that body. Your boyfriend must be mad about you. I wonder he cares to share you with me”, the stranger says with devilishly smug, Fingers playing with Pran’s hair.
“P-please don’t touch me. My boyfriend will be here any seconds now. Let me go, please”, Pran pleads.
“Your boyfriend is far too drunk to realize his lover is gone for a quick fuck, baby. Come here”, the man pulls him closer and fumbles with Pran’s jeans button. Pran attempts to push the man away, but to no avail. The man is muscular and huge, so there’s no way Pran can push him off. He starts tearing up and begs the man to let him go. Pran is sure he screams at some point. But the loud music drowns his voice. No one is coming to save him. The man succeeds in getting Pran’s jeans and trunk to his ankle. The predator whistles at the sight and turns Pran around so that Pran is facing the wall and holds him there. The man is unbuttoning his own jeans and Pran begins sobbing harder. Pran’s mouth is silenced by the man’s hand. The man leans forward to Pran’s ear and whispers, “a slut like you deserves this. this boy pussy should be filled by multiple men. bet you would like that, huh?”, the man laughs and Pran has a feeling the stranger is about to enter his hole any moment now. Pran struggles as much as he can an– the laughter stops and the body trapping him just now is no longer touching him. Pran turns around to see Pat beating up the stranger and kicks him out of the toilet. The man flees. Pran is relieved to see his lover. He notices Pat sobers a little, compared to when he left him at the table. He pulls his jeans back up with trembling hands and runs to Pat to hug him, but Pat pushes him away.
“Let’s get home. Now!”, Pat says angrily. Pran is confused but Pat is already walking away towards the car. Pran is concerned that Pat is going to drive in his drunken state, but doesn’t dare to say a word. The car ride is silent. Pran is still shaken up by the incident and Pat is angry with him. What did he do wrong, Pran wonders. He just hopes Pat won’t relapse with his anger issue because he has been doing so well.
As soon as Pat closes the apartment door behind them, he grabs Pran by the hair and throw him into the wall. Loud thud echoes the apartment, he is sure their neighbour will file noise complaint later. Pran falls to the floor as his legs give up. Pran has no energy left to fight back. He braces himself for the punches and kicks from Pat, even though he has no idea what he did wrong. His worry of Pat relapsing is coming true.
As he anticipated, Pat throws punches to his cheekbone and right eye. Pran gathers his strength to escape from Pat. But his lover is quick to deliver kicks to his stomach and thighs, making it hard for Pran to get on his feet.
“Pat, stop please! You’re hurting me! Enough, please. Pat, I’m sorry! Please, please stop!”, Pran is sobbing and gasping for air from the relentless kicks.
The attacks slow down as Pat’s energy is draining. But Pat is not done yet. He kneels next to Pran and pulls his hair.
“What were you thinking, Pran?! You really took advantage of my drunken state, to go for a quick fuck in the toilet?! I never thought you were that much of a slut! If I didn’t catch you in there, I wonder how many more men you would have fucking you there!”, Pat screams, seething in anger.
Pran is horrified. Pat thinks that lowly of him. He almost got raped, but his boyfriend thinks otherwise. Pat is misunderstanding this.
“N-no! Pat, the guy cornered me in the toilet and I didn’t want it! He almost raped me, Pat! Then you came through the door just before he was about to put his dick in me! Couldn’t you see that I was crying?!”, Pran explains, frustrated.
Still slightly toxicated, Pat refuses to believe Pran’s excuse. Back there, he clearly saw Pran begging for the man to fuck him. Or maybe his mind is playing tricks with him. But he’s in denial. He is sure Pran was trying to cheat on him. Pat lets the voice in his head take control. So, he does what he usually did when he is mad at Pran.
He collides his clenched fist with Pran’s cheek twice. Pran whimpers in pain and covers his face to avoid the attacks.
“Don’t fucking lie to me, Pran! I swear I will kill yo–“, Pat hears gasps from the front door.
Korn, Wai, Mo, and Chang are standing at the door. Watching as the scene unfolds. Pat stands up and panics.
“Oh hey. What are you all doing here?”, Pat starts nervously.
“What the fuck are you doing, Pat?!”, Wai screams and marches towards Pat. He grabs Pat by the shirt and drags him away from Pran.
Mo and Chang quickly rush to Pran’s side, helping him sit down. But Pran is in and out of conciousness. Korn is already calling the ambulance because there’s blood all over Pran’s face and he knows it’s bad.
Wai is still holding Pat against the wall, not letting him go anywhere.
The ambulance arrives and takes Pran to the hospital. When Pran regains concious six hours later, he looks around to see he is in a hospital. Korn and Wai are sleeping on the couch in his ward. He wonders where Pat is. But he remembers what happened before he blacked out. Pat lost his temper, the worst Pran had experienced. Pran remembers thinking that he was about to die in Pat hands as he received those attacks. Now, he hopes Pat is nowhere near him.
Pran clears his dry throat and calls out to the duo on the couch. Both guys get up immediately and stand beside his bed.
“Pran, how are you feeling? Do you need anything?”, Korn asks frantically.
“Just water, please”, Pran requests, voice hoarse.
He drinks as much as he can because his throat hurts from all the screaming.
“Do you remember what happened, Pran?”, Wai asks cautiously. Pran nods.
“Do you want to tell us what happened?”, Wai asks again.
Pran shakes his head. He’s not ready to tell anyone about Pat’s abuse.
Both Korn and Wai nod in understanding with sympathetic eyes.
“Where’s Pat?”, Pran asks in a soft voice.
The duo look at each other with surprised expression.
“Why, Pran? Do you want him in here? He hurts you!”, Wai says, defensive.
“N-not really. I’m just curious. He’s my boyfriend after all”, Pran says sadly.
“A good boyfriend doesn’t abuse you, Pran! Pat certainly isn’t one!”, Korn almost screams. Pran wants to cry.
“We’re sorry. But you need to understand that Pat is abusive. You didn’t deserve what he did to you. Look at you now, Pran. You almost died. God only knows what would happen if we didn’t follow you two to the apartment last night”, Wai says calmly, knowing that Pran is traumatic to tense situations.
Pran listens, but doesn’t respond. They are right. Pran could’ve died. He reminisces all the abuse Pat put him through, and how Pat was doing so well after his therapy sessions. Pran was so happy he got his Pat back. Then, last night happened. Without realizing, Pran is full on sobbing on the bed. Korn and Wai try to calm him down. Pran stops crying after 10 minutes.
“Pran. We have to ask you something. You need to make a decision. We wanted to take Pat to the police, but we figured we need to ask you beforehand, since you’re the victim here. Right now, he is with Mo and Chang at my house. They’re making sure he won’t run away”, Korn says.
Pran’s eyes widen at the suggestion. It never crossed his mind to report Pat to the police, no matter how much he was hurting.
“I-i’m not sure, guys. I never thought of reporting him to the police. He’s my boyfriend, of course I wouldn’t. Actually, he has been going to therapy sessions for the last couple of months. He was doing so well. Some misunderstandings happened last night and he relapsed”, Pran explains.
“O-okay. I’m guessing Pat has been like this for far too long, yeah?”, Wai inquires. Pran nods, head down in shame.
“Do you want to give him another chance then? It seems like you’re reluctant to report him”, Korn asks, concerned.
Pran nods. “Yeah”, he confirms. “But I need to see him first. I need to talk to him”, Pran requests.
Korn and Wai give concerned look to their friend.
“Okay, we’ll bring Pat here. But we will be in this room with you two. Deal?”, Korn suggests.
Pran smiles and nods. Grateful his friends are concerned about his safety.
The next day, Korn and Wai bring Pat to see Pran. Wai gives a heads up to Pran signalling Pat is here. Pran takes a deep breath when Pat enters the room. His boyfriend is eyeing him from afar with sad eyes, mixed with remorse. Korn and Wai sit on the couch, watching the two carefully. Pran tries to smile at Pat but his face still hurts and he ends up letting out a wince. He can see Pat’s face changes, he looks like he’s about to cry. Pran wants to give him a hug so bad. But he’s not ready for physical contact with Pat.
Pat sits down on the chair next to his bed.
“Hey”, Pat croaks. “How are you? Sorry, that was stupid. Of course, you’re not okay. You got hospitalized because of me. I’m so sorry, Pran! I have no idea what got into me last night. I should’ve believed you when you told me the truth. I’m sorry this happened”, Pat has tears forming in his eyes. Pran’s heart softens at the sight.
“You know, you hurt me real bad this time, Pat. My heart broke when you didn’t believe me when I said I almost got raped. I’m your boyfriend, you’re supposed to have some trust in me. Then, you beat me up relentlessly. You crushed me inside and out. For years, I put up with your abuse. I was living in fear, when you were supposed to be my safe zone. But I loved you too much to leave, Pat. Now, I don’t know if I can deal with our relationship any longer. You’ve pushed me to my breaking point, Pat. When you relapsed last night, I lost all hope of changing you into the old sweet Pat. You were doing so good, Pat. You didn’t get violent with me for months! I was so happy for all those months. I thought maybe the aggresive side of you wouldn’t come back”, Pran chuckles sadly.
Tears stream down Pat’s face. He fucked up. He broke Pran. Pran used to be bubbly and loud. He realized his boyfriend no longer smiles with his dimples. Oh, how he misses those dimples. Pat wishes he could turn back time to when they first met. Everything was simple back then. But he only has himself to blame. He made Pran like this.
“I’m sorry, baby”, Pat says with shaky voice.
“Don’t. Don’t call me that. I-i think it’s better if we part ways for now, Pat. I need a break from you and all of this and focus on my upcoming internship. And you should see your therapist again. I know you have been skipping the appointments lately”, Pran scolds.
Pat should’ve seen this coming. Pran wants to break up with him. Of course he wants to escape from a monster like him. Pran is right. They both need a break to figure shit out.
“Okay. If that is what you think is best, I respect that”, Pat admits.
Pran is relieved Pat doesn’t make scene like he thought Pat would. Plus, Korn and Wai are in the same room. Pat wouldn’t dare anyway.
“Thank you, Pran, for not reporting me to the police. Again, I’m truly sorry for the past two years we were together. All the shits you had to endure because of my anger issue and violent outbursts. You didn’t deserve any of them. It was all on me. You have been the best person I have in my life. Thank you for getting me into therapy. I owe everything to you”, Pat finishes his sentence.
Korn and Wai feel bad for Pat. He’s their friend after all. Not their best friend, but still a friend.
Pran is in awe hearing Pat’s words. He cautiously takes Pat’s hand in his, assuring Pat that everything is going to be okay.
“I guess I will be making my way out now. By the way, Pran. You can take your time taking your things from my apartment. I will be renting another apartment in the meantime, so you don’t have to worry about bumping into me there”, Pat smiles sadly.
Pran nods, even though he wants to say that is unnecessary.
Pat is about to exit the room and he takes one last look at Pran.
“Goodbye, Pran”
“Goodbye, Pat”
^^
THE END