Chapter Text
In the still of the night
I held you, held you tight
'Cause I love, love you so
Promise I'll never let you go
Tankhun was letting Arm lead the way because he was aware that his bodyguard tended to overprepare things. That was also the reason why he followed the other man with almost no worry in his heart. Some anxiety always lingered but not because he didn’t trust Arm enough – Arm was one of the few people he trusted entirely.
“I couldn’t find out exactly in which cabin Porsche is staying but I know in which area we have to look.”
While Arm did turn slightly towards Tankhun to talk to him he didn’t force eye contact because the bodyguard knew that he wasn’t always comfortable with that. With Arm, Tankhun just felt seen and that heightened the sense of security the other one gave him.
“That’s okay. We can just ask for direction.”
He petted Arm’s shoulder who was not in his usual bodyguard attire because Tankhun didn’t want to intimidate Porsche. For the same reason, Pol didn’t accompany them because showing up with two bodyguards seemed a little intense even for Tankhun’s standards. After all, he just wanted to get to know the man who made his little brother so happy.
However, seeing Arm in his casual clothes with his soft hoodie and his jeans also felt somewhat intimate. Tankhun had the deep urge to loop his arm through the other one's as they were walking side by side – but that wouldn’t be appropriate.
“Are you okay?”
Following that, Tankhun tried to chase those thoughts away because he would never want to actively worry Arm. He was aware that the other man was aware that this whole endeavour was very much out of his comfort zone. But his curiosity – and the worry for Kinn’s heart – had gotten the best of Tankhun who had decided to go out of his way to do this because this was an important matter.
“Yes, I am”, he reassured Arm who still had his eyebrows knitted tightly together in a clear gesture of worry – Tankhun wanted to gently rub over the wrinkle to smooth it out.
Despite that, he had to settle on: “Relax, Arm.”
For the rest of their walk, Tankhun decided to babble on about some of his newest theories for the show they were watching at the moment. As always, Arm tried to engage in the conversation and show that he was paying attention which made Tankhun’s heart melt every single time. Actually, taking a walk like that under the starlight and talking with Arm felt like the most natural thing – Tankhun would consider doing this again.
They had finally almost reached their destination and now, they only needed to find out which cabin was Porsche’s. Fortunately, the employee who had taken such good care of Tankhun’s luggage was just walking by them.
“Excuse me?”, Tankhun asked to stop him in his tracks.
While scanning the other one, his eyes landed on the necklace the other man was wearing. For some reason, it looked familiar and it definitely looked too expensive for a resort employee – Tankhun had an eye for these things.
“We are searching for Porsche. Can you help us?”
It hit Tankhun that he had seen a similar necklace on his cousin Vegas before – if not the same one. That was an interesting bit of information that Tankhun would hold onto just in case.
“Uhm sure…wait, you are Kinn’s brother, right?”
Tankhun also took a positive note that the stranger remembered that. Furthermore, his connection to Kinn actually earned him and Arm a direction for getting to Porsche’s place which came in very handy.
When Tankhun knocked on Porsche’s door, his heartbeat shortly skyrocketed but he had perfected looking mostly calm on the outside. Although he knew why he was here he hadn’t quite thought about what he would do upon meeting the other man – apart from finding out if he was deserving of Kinn or not.
“I am Kinn’s older brother, Tankhun. This is Arm, my bodyguard.”
For a few seconds, Porsche was standing in the doorway blinking perplexedly and obviously being at a loss for words. But then, he slowly moved to the side and gestured for them to come in. Inside Tankhun took a seat on one of the two available chairs after Porsche offered it to him while Arm kept his position by the door to watch over the scene.
“I would have announced myself but the whole point was to catch you while you are not prepared for it”, Tankhun explained casually.
In the meantime, Porsche had sat down on the other chair but still seemed a little lost.
“Okay, sure”, the other one responded slightly irritated which was a reaction Tankhun got often – people normally didn't quite know how to place his behaviour.
“I mean I have to make sure that my little brother is being treated right.”
That statement seemed to resonate with Porsche who slowly started nodding. Nevertheless, there was still some confusion reflected in his dark brown eyes that looked quite pretty up close. Tankhun wanted to make sure to compliment him on them later on.
“Yeah, no, I get that. I have a little brother too.”
In return, that sparked Tankhun’s interest and he sat up a little straighter.
“Oh really?”
“Yes, Chay is 16”, Porsche paused before he added, “he likes dramas too.”
Tankhun took a positive note of the fact that the other man could remember that information. After all, that meant that Porsche was actually listening to Kinn and his little brother deserved someone who paid attention to every word he said.
“By the way, he would probably love that jacket as well.”
Following that, Tankhun glanced down to take in the rather simple white jacket he was wearing today that had pearls stitched onto it. If Porsche was right about his brother’s taste, he would definitely like the boy.
“You know what? You can have it.”
Tankhun motioned to get up and take it off but Porsche hurried to stop him.
“No, no, keep it.”
The other man reached his arms out but didn’t touch him. Nevertheless, Arm had taken two steps forward which was the reason why Tankhun shot him a soothing look before focussing back on Porsche.
Porsche smiled at him and Tankhun couldn’t help but smile back because this was a genuinely friendly smile – normally, people gave him these polite but subliminally judgy smiles. This probably shouldn’t be such a big deal but for Tankhun it was something extraordinary. Generally speaking, Porsche really made a good first impression.
“But I see where Kinn gets his generosity from.”
Although these words were mostly meant to charm him Tankhun didn’t miss the deeper meaning. He was glad that someone saw Kinn’s kindness and appreciated it too – glad that their father hadn’t been able to take it from his brother completely. Furthermore, the fact that Kinn had let Porsche see this side of him was also very telling to Tankhun.
“I raised him right.”
“I guess you did”, Porsche agreed with a smile on his lips that quickly disappeared which was confusing until he exclaimed: “Shit, my manners. I haven’t even offered you something to drink.”
This time, it was Tankhun who held Porsche back from getting up. Nonetheless, he did appreciate the thought and took note that Porsche was actually well-mannered – not taking his foul language into consideration.
“You see I was actually just leaving for a party when you dropped by and that’s why I didn’t really think of it.”
Tankhun did understand that reasoning and was actually already thinking about offering to leave because he had seen what he wanted to see – he approved of Porsche. However, the other man then added: “You know you can join me for the party if you want to.”
After all these years of living a more isolated life only surrounded by people who knew him well enough, Tankhun actually didn’t quite know how to react to such an offer. But then, Porsche surprised him: “Oh no, I didn’t mean to be rude. I know you don’t like social gatherings. I didn’t want to put you in an awkward position.”
Porsche sounded genuinely sorry and a little upset which touched Tankhun’s heart. Again, he took a positive note of Porsche apparently remembering details and caring about them too. Maybe that led him to respond: “I will come with you.”
All the way from Porsche’s cabin to the party Tankhun could feel Arm being tense behind him because this had been a spontaneous thing and not something they had agreed on beforehand. However, Tankhun knew that this was about Arm worrying about him and not Arm being mad at him. He shortly thought about reaching out to squeeze the other one’s shoulder to reassure him that he actually wanted this but he stopped himself multiple times because it never felt quite fitting.
As they entered the location the loudness of the music and the mass of people hit Tankhun like a brick wall. Although he tried to focus on Porsche who was leading the way through the crowd he could feel his chest getting tight. It got increasingly hard to breathe until he could feel Arm’s presence closer. Due to the lack of space, Arm placed his hand on the small of Tankhun's back and that already helped him to ground himself.
“Do you want to leave?”, Arm’s breath tickled Tankhun’s ear and suddenly, he was out of breath because of something else – under other circumstances, he would have appreciated it more.
Further, Tankhun wondered if – with Arm not being visibly dressed up as his bodyguard like he normally was – people would assume that they were a couple. If people would be looking at them in this position and think that Arm was just his boyfriend who was a little possessive. However, Tankhun couldn't allow himself to get too lost in the idea of Arm being his boyfriend because it wasn't appropriate.
Despite everything, Tankhun managed to shake his head because he really wanted to stay. Porsche seemed like interesting company and he would like to spend some more time with him. Somehow, he also trusted that the other one had a plan to make this party work for him.
Fortunately, Porsche didn’t disappoint him as he was leading them to an almost calm corner of the room that seemed to be the area where the drinks were prepared. Tankhun could feel himself get a lot less tense which also led to Arm letting go of him – which was frankly displeasing.
“So what’s your poison?”
Porsche took his place behind the bar with a certain aura of knowing what he was doing and Tankhun was immediately intrigued by how this would pan out. Following that, Arm and he took the chairs that were placed in front of the bar. However, before Tankhun was able to answer for himself his bodyguard chimed in: “Go easy on him, okay?”
Tankhun had to admit that it was endearing how protective Arm sometimes got of him. Afterwards, he had to bite back a smile because it really didn’t sound controlling or intimidating but solely anxious. Of course, he didn’t want Arm to be on edge because of him but it made him feel special nevertheless.
“If the man wants to take me out, he should do it the proper way”, after having said that to Arm, Tankhun turned back to Porsche, “Arm gets an iced tea. That’s his favourite.”
In the corner of his eye, Tankhun saw his bodyguard look at him in wonder – he couldn't help it this time and had to smile softly at that. Obviously, he knew Arm's favourite drink and he even knew the other one’s favourite brand although he wouldn’t admit that out loud.
“Make me something you think I would like”, Tankhun told Porsche who gave him a long look before going to work.
As he waited for his drink he started swaying a little to the music they could still hear where they were seated. Arm next to him pretend like he was only sipping on his iced tea but he was subtly checking out their surroundings and Tankhun was absolutely aware of it.
“Do you like dancing?”
Porsche was still mixing his drink but still gave him an interested look.
“I mean I do but I am not skilled or anything as I haven't done anything like clubbing or engaging in social events or anything.”
Tankhun didn't have a problem talking about all this, especially because Porsche seemed so non–judgmental. Nonetheless, he could all of a sudden feel Arm's hand on his back again rubbing soothing circles into his muscles.
“I can show you some moves if you like”, the other man paused to chuckle, “I taught your brother to dance after all.”
Finally, Porsche placed down his drink but Tankhun had to ignore it for now. Instead, he snapped forward to ask excitedly: “Was it bad ?”
He could remember a handful of occasions where Kinn had to engage in formal dancing and he had always done mostly fine. However, Tankhun surely had had trouble imagining his little brother actually performing a dance over the past week.
“No, no, he is good…amazing actually.”
It made Tankhun truly happy to hear the adoration in Porsche’s voice so clearly. No matter what his brother chose to believe in it was blatantly obvious that this man had feelings for him – Tankhun just hoped that Kinn would figure this out in time.
“I am sure he gets that from you too.”
This time Tankhun had to roll his eyes lovingly at Porsche’s grin who tried to charm him so shamelessly. Nevertheless, he let himself be led to the utmost rim of the dancefloor to dance a little side by side with his new friend. He could feel Arm’s eyes on him for the entire time until he dared to look in his bodyguard’s direction who was quick to avert his gaze – they were still playing the old game.
As Arm and Tankhun were about to leave a very drunk Porsche insisted on walking them home because he felt responsible for Tankhun. Even multiple assertions from his bodyguard that this was unnecessary didn’t stop the other man. To be fair, Tankhun had acted a little drunker than he actually was for the fun of it but he was aware that multiple of the drinks Porsche had given him had been mocktails rather than cocktails.
While they were walking he maybe leaned a little more into Arm than necessary. However, that was also the case due to the fact that Porsche definitely was more trouble than help which was also kind of funny. While Tankhun had to stop himself from laughing, Arm was trying very hard to keep his stoic face on which was endearing.
Unexpectedly, Tankhun's cousin Vegas appeared out of nowhere which wasn't surprising to Tankhun – Vegas had always been the best at their games of hide&seek. However, Porsche who had been walking backwards and in front of them for a few steps evidently got startled by this.
“It looked like you needed help. You take care of Porsche and I take Tankhun”, was all he said to Arm before he put his arm gently around Tankhun.
The whole ordeal of getting back to their vacation home got a bit awkward after that. While his cousin was very much of help he didn't seem interested in holding a conversation or anything. It had been a long time since they had been so close to each other or had had a proper talk – Tankhun could remember the last time very clearly. It had been on his eleventh birthday and Vegas had shared his hiding spot with Tankhun so that they could win the game together. This had obviously been before Tankhun's kidnapping and when he had finally been stable enough to interact with people his age again – that weren't his brothers – Vegas had been very distant with him. At some point, Macau and he had completely isolated themselves from Tankhun and their other cousins – until this day Tankhun didn't know what they had done wrong to deserve this treatment.
Tankhun was aware that Kinn also thought about these events from time to time especially because he was the one who worked with Vegas almost every day. So when they had to face his younger brother back at the house Tankhun tried to keep an eye out for their interaction. However, he also was eager to create the opportunity for Kinn to have some alone time with Porsche and that was a bit more important. That was the reason why he took a few steps towards his brother in the entrance hall because it was a no–brainer that Kinn would call out for Arm to take care of him which would leave Porsche behind without support. Judging from Vegas' general behaviour so far it was also clear that he would more likely just leave instead of helping Porsche.
As Arm was leading him up the stairs, Tankhun was content to see over his shoulder that his predictions had worked themselves out perfectly. On their way to his room, he also realised that he didn’t want to let go of Arm just yet – the evening just had been so nice. So when Arm helped him to sit down on his bed, Tankhun held onto his hands on purpose.
“Can you stay with me, Arm?”
Tankhun heard for himself that there was a dangerous implication in his words. Deep down, he knew that he had feelings for Arm and that Arm had feelings for him too – it was just unclear if one of them would ever act on them. However, with these words, he might have finally crossed the border to some extent.
“I don't think that's a good idea, Khun”, Arm replied softly which indicated that he had picked up on the implication, too.
Nevertheless, it appeared that Arm had decided to let go of some of his usual business-like seriousness and distance as well – Tankhun wished he would call him by that pet name more often.
“Please, I don't want to have nightmares tonight. The night has been too nice for that.”
That really wasn't a lie he told Arm to get him to stay – the emotional manipulation was something Tankhun left to his father. He wanted to treasure the memory of this night where he had made such a big step for himself and didn't want to be hit by the repercussions of his night terrors. And of course, Tankhun had noticed that the nightmares tended to stay away whenever he fell asleep next to Arm on the couch – even if he woke up all alone in his own bed the next morning because the other man had made sure to bring him to bed.
Their eyes met for a very long moment before Arm sighed softly and replied: “Okay, but let me get you some water. I will be back, promise.”
Naturally, Arm held out his pinky and naturally, Tankhun hooked their fingers together – the familiarity of the gesture only hit Tankhun now. They had done this a thousand times before and Tankhun only just now realised how it had become the normal thing Arm did to reassure him. Arm was always so quick in accepting Tankhun's quirks – even indulged them from time to time.
After Arm had slipped out of the room Tankhun had to lie back on the bed to breathe for a few seconds and to collect his thoughts. He really hadn't planned to make this move today and maybe the alcohol had influenced him a little after all. However, he didn't regret it – he actually felt strangely hopeful.
Further, he was sure that Arm had mostly used getting water for him as an excuse to also be able to think – the other man had already made sure he drank so much water during the party. Hopefully, they separately would come to the same conclusion.
When the waiting got a bit boring, Tankhun decided that he should probably at least brush his teeth and clean his face. He didn't have enough energy anymore to properly change into his pyjamas but he took off his jacket as he walked over to the bathroom revealing a simple white shirt.
Because of the running water of the tab, Arm gently knocked against the open door to announce himself so Tankhun wouldn't get startled – the other one was always considerate like that. Tankhun felt his heart swell with fondness.
“What are you doing?”, the other man asked him slightly amused and slightly affectionate.
Arm had perfected to not wear his affection for Tankhun on his sleeve but he had always managed to see right through the other one.
“Making myself ready for bed. Got a problem with that?”
Following that, the other man was quick to shake his head but a low chuckle escaped his lips that made Tankhun's heart skip a beat. Afterwards, Arm kept his position leaning in the doorway to watch over him – this somehow felt incredibly domestic and intimate. Sure, the other man had been around before when Tankhun did these things but always in his bodyguard uniform and always clearly outside the bathroom. He had never spent this time so natural and casual with Tankhun.
As Tankhun picked up his own toothbrush he held one spare one out for Arm telling him: “You know you should too. Come here.”
Now, they were even closer placed together in front of the mirror and brushing their teeth. Tankhun couldn't help but notice how normal they looked side by side – just a couple doing an everyday task together. In spite of the warm feeling in his stomach, he had to look away from their reflections because it was a little too much and not enough at the same time.
When they got out of the bathroom Tankhun immediately missed the closeness. However, he didn't have much time to lament this because Arm was dragging over a chair to sit by his bedside – of course, the other man knew exactly on which side Tankhun always slept. Tankhun hadn't really expected Arm to share the bed with him but he still couldn't help but feel a little disappointed in this. So he made up for it by reaching out to hold the other one's hand – Arm didn't pull back.
“Can you tell me about your theories for our new drama?”
Tankhun quickly looked up to Arm who didn't have enough time to properly veil the adoration in his gaze. In return, Tankhun had to close his own eyes for a few seconds to properly cope with this.
“Sure, if that's what you want.”
To underline his words, Arm tenderly squeezed his hand before he started talking. That's how Tankhun fell asleep on that perfect night – with Arm's hushed tones in his ear making the night even more perfect.
Tankhun was a light sleeper because how could he not be after everything that had happened to him? That was the reason why he immediately woke up when Arm tried to get up from the chair probably to sneak out of his room. The amount of light in the room told him that it had to be the early hours of the morning.
“Don’t go.”
Blindly, Tankhun reached out to grasp Arm’s hand again which had lingered on the bed next to him. Arm froze in his motion which meant that he now was slightly bent over Tankhun.
“Please, Arm.”
Tankhun knew that Arm would never really deny him anything and he knew that it was probably selfish to use that against the other one like that – but maybe once in a while, Tankhun deserved to be selfish. Despite that certainty, he held his breath until Arm sat back down and properly intertwined their fingers. The air between them was heavy with all the things they had left unspoken although they both were aware that they couldn’t avoid them forever.
For some reason and all of a sudden, Tankhun felt like he should at least try to address this elephant in the room: “You and I both know that you can’t blame it on the alcohol now.”
Even in the dim light, he could see the corner of Arm’s mouth curl up although he couldn’t quite make out what amused the other one at the moment.
“It could still be residual alcohol.”
Of course, Arm – his beloved nerd – would come up with an explanation like that although the answer was right in front of his eyes. But then again, Tankhun liked Arm’s quick-wittedness and his intellect. That fact didn’t stop him from picking up a pillow with his free hand and softly hitting Arm’s shoulder.
“It’s not that and you know that.”
The low laughter appeared to die in Arm’s throat and Tankhun wanted it back immediately. Instead, he asked pleadingly: “Just hold me – will you?”
He felt way too vulnerable but with Arm that didn’t feel as bad as it normally did. Apparently, all of this got through to Arm who quickly replied: “Yes. Yes, of course.”
Following that, the other man circled the bed so Tankhun could stay on his favourite side and had to turn over to be able to face Arm again. Moreover, the hesitation seemed to have left the other man who now deliberately reached out to put his arms around Tankhun. They breathed the same air and Tankhun relaxed into this moment that felt like the right things finally falling into place.
“I know I am not easy to love, Arm”, Tankhun needed to whisper these words in the space between them.
In the meantime, he had settled on playing with the strings on Arm’s hoodie to avoid eye contact. However, a quick glimpse at the other one’s face which he could see pretty good now that they were up close revealed that Arm had knitted his eyebrows together again – just not in a worried but in a displeased way. This time, Tankhun didn’t hold back and gently rubbed over the crease to smooth it out.
“Who told you that?”, Arm requested to know before capturing Tankhun’s hands to guide them between the two of them and hold onto them tenderly.
“I came to that conclusion on my own. Thank you very much.”
Tankhun thought that this was an absolute no-brainer because he came prepared with so many issues his psychological diagnosis almost took up the length of a novella. His life was mostly built around escapism and self-centeredness. He chose to live in his own world where one of the most important things was his clothes. Apart from that, he had his shows to obsess about while taking care of himself used up most of his energy. Tankhun felt like he was mostly concerned with himself and himself only which really wasn’t a loveable characteristic. Somebody clever like Arm, frankly, should also have come to this conclusion.
But Arm pulled him out of this slumber by pressing the softest kisses onto his knuckles which took Tankhun’s breath away. Their eyes crossed again and Tankhun immediately knew that no matter what Arm would tell him next he wouldn’t be prepared for it.
“I guess even someone as smart as you has to be wrong about something every now and then.”
Tankhun couldn’t quite believe that his Arm could sound so teasing and loving at the same time – couldn’t believe he had missed out on that side for so long. Although Tankhun didn’t know where this moment was leading them he really hoped he would get a chance to discover more of these hidden sides of the other one.
Before he could ask a follow-up question, Arm stroked some of his hairs back into their place – which made Tankhun’s already beating heart flutter – and continued on: “Loving you is the easiest thing I've ever done, Khun.”
Tankhun could feel tears sting in his eyes but when the first one rolled down his cheek Arm was there to catch it. Afterwards, the other man kept cupping his face and started caressing his cheek.
“It’s the easiest thing because you know my favourite drink. You somehow always know when I need new dress shirts and you just buy them for me. You know which dramas I don't want to see because of certain topics. You make sure I brush my teeth. You never forget to send a present on my mum's birthday.”
Although Arm stopped there it seemed like he could have gone on forever. Nevertheless, the irony that this statement completely contradicted his own self-image didn’t escape Tankhun. Despite that, Tankhun mostly got hung up on that last sentence which made him state in return: “I mean she gave me the most precious gift I could ever ask for.”
Now, he mirrored Arm’s gesture and cupped his cheek in return – the other one instantly leaned into his touch. A small part of Tankhun warned him to not indulge in this too much but he felt like there was no turning back anymore.
“You say the sweetest things with a casualness that absolutely baffles me sometimes”, Arm paused to kiss the insight of the hand that was still holding onto his face, “another reason why you are easy to love.”
Tankhun didn’t quite know what he should do with himself anymore when he so desperately just wanted to sink into this moment to keep it forever.
“I know I shouldn’t ask you to kiss me…”, and he couldn’t bring himself to really finish this sentence.
In spite of a lot of people thinking that he was out of touch with reality, Tankhun was actually deeply aware that their relationship came with a power imbalance. He was aware that they needed to address that if they wanted to move forward. But Tankhun was also aware that he had fallen in love with Arm slowly but deeply. Furthermore, he was absolutely certain that it was the same for the other one which Arm proved with his own comment: “No, you definitely should.”
That made Tankhun chuckle as he hid his face at the level of Arm’s shoulder because this was nice and overwhelming at the same time – maybe it was nicely overwhelming.
“Would you kiss me then?”, he mumbled into the fabric of the other one’s hoodie who still seemed to understand him.
Following that, Arm held his face so tenderly and was kissing him so softly that Tankhun couldn't help but melt into it. They stayed like this for minutes which could very well have been hours. Afterwards, Arm just pulled him a little closer and held him as they breathed together. They had their legs entangled like it was the most natural thing – like they had done this a million times before. Arm had Tankhun’s head tucked under his chin and this just felt incredibly safe.
While Tankhun was lying there completely engulfed by Arm his head felt pleasingly empty. Feeling all these big feelings and finally talking things out had apparently drained him. However, this state led him to remember the most random thing.
“Oh no, I forgot to tell Porsche that he had pretty eyes”, Tankhun exclaimed annoyed with himself.
Arm pushed him a little away to be able to look at his face again. A quick glance at the other one’s expression revealed a furrowed brow that looked yet again different than before.
“That’s what you are thinking about now?”
Tankhun couldn’t help but kiss Arm’s tense jawbone as the other man was still glancing at him in disbelief.
“You are cute when you’re jealous, Arm.”
To underline his words, he reached up to peck Arm’s lip who was quick to kiss back. When they parted again Arm kept his hand on Tankhun’s waist to rub little circles into his side.
“I am not jealous.”
“Sure, Arm, you are not jealous at all ”, Tankhun replied teasingly while he enjoyed himself very much.
For some reason, Arm now lifted a hand to trace Tankhun’s lips which made his breath hitch. There was something new in the other one’s eyes that he had never seen before. Of course, Arm sometimes challenged him gently but never like this – he liked it.
“I am the one in this bed with you, am I not?”, Arm stated this more matter-of-factly than asking it but Tankhun nodded nevertheless.
“And I want only you, Tankhun”, the other man said as if it didn’t turn Tankhun’s entire world around.
“I also want only you, Arm”, he barely managed to reply.
“See. I have nothing to be jealous about.”
With these words, Arm pulled him in for another kiss before Tankhun crawled back into his embrace. The warmness of the other one’s body and the steadiness of his heartbeat so close helped Tankhun to sleep as calmly as he hadn’t had in years – he was sure it was the same for Arm who overslept for the first time since they had known each other.