Chapter Text
When he woke up that morning, it felt like any other. A familiar weight by his shoulder, and warmth he has grown accustomed to sprawled all over his body- even breaths that he can feel through their chests under the covers. He immediately thinks of how lucky he is to fall asleep and wake up next to the same man he has loved for 6 years now. And he was even luckier because said man loved him back just as much.
"Are you staring at me again?" Yoongi mumbles, his morning voice in a lower register than his usual. "You must be so in love with me." He laughs silently as he pulls Seokjin even closer to him as if there was still any space left between them. "What do you want for breakfast?"
Seokjin lifts his hand towards Yoongi's hair and threads it with his fingers, making the other nuzzle into the crook of his neck. "Don't you have work today?"
Yoongi shakes his head no. "I took some time off." He gives his neck a soft kiss. "It's our anniversary. It's just right that my husband gets to have me for himself for the whole day, don't you think?" Another kiss. "Do you just want to stay in bed? Or do you want to have breakfast first and then we can just go back to bed? Or anything. Just tell me- and I'll make sure you'll have it." He whispers in his ear before returning back to Seokjin's neck to leave more open-mouthed kisses.
"Just say you want to stay in bed." he smiles as he holds Yoongi's waist, keeping him close, encouraging the other to continue. "But we can't. You know we have that dinner party tonight. And if you're not going to work, you'll have to accompany me to prepare for that." He laughs as he hears a groan from the other before he feels him shaking his head no. "Oh come on. It's the first time we're seeing all of them again since Namjoon just came back from the US."
Yoongi sighs and nods a little. "Fine. I'm sad you're more excited to see them than to celebrate the fact that today is our 2nd wedding anniversary." Seokjin laughs after hearing that. "Do I need to sign up at the gym like him and Jungkook for you to want to see me today?"
Seokjin pinches his cheeks before leaning over to kiss him. "I think you can carry me just the same and you look just as fine, love. I'm still yours the whole day- and for the rest of our lives." He smiles when Yoongi nods, his eyes not leaving Seokjin's lips. "And it would be nice to talk to someone and have them look me in the eyes." he laughs, making Yoongi pout. "Now come on, let's get up. We can have pancakes before we get groceries. I miss being domestic husbands in the supermarket."
His husband leans in for another kiss before getting up. "You just want me to push the cart."
"You know me so well." he smiles.
Two years of marital bliss and it was all what Jin could ever want or hope for. Because it is Yoongi.
Loving Yoongi was not having butterflies- no. Loving him is like being wrapped in a big fluffy blanket as it storms outside. Having him is knowing your hands will always be held. Knowing him is understanding that you will never be alone. Because being loved by Min Yoongi is experiencing how it is to be known and understood, which is something he never knew he needed. He was okay being a stranger to others, just looking in, not really seeing him. But Yoongi? He took one look at him and never looked away.
He read him as if he was the most interesting book- even when his words are dull.
Yoongi knows how Seokjin wants to be held on nights when sadness hits him like a wave, unforeseen and overwhelming. He knows how to handle his broken pieces and put him back together, always gentle. Careful- as if he was afraid of breaking him.
He is what Seokjin would call as safe space.
"You're smiling at your bacon. Did it tell you a joke?"
He looks up and meets Yoongi's eyes for a second before he goes back to whatever he was reading on his iPad. Seokjin makes faces at him before taking a piece of bacon. "I think you just married me for my jokes."
Yoongi looks up once again, and then gets up from his seat and makes his way towards Seokjin to kiss him. He tastes like coffee and honey and everything good in the world. "I married you for your lips, but you believe what you want to believe in." he whispers against the kiss, leaving another peck before he pulls away. "I'm going to take a shower before we leave. You can come join me if you want." he says as he walks away.
Seokjin rolls his eyes but he bites down a smile. "Yoongi, it's hot outside and I don't want to wear a turtleneck sweater." he replies, knowing what his husband wants to do.
The other just laughs. "You don't have to hide it anyhow. People know we're married and we're no longer teenagers who needs to hide their love bites." he says before disappearing around the corner, making Jin just smile to himself. It was not even 3 seconds later when Yoongi peeks from behind the wall again and adds, "Besides, it would be nice for other people to know you're taken."
"Go take a shower." Seokjin says with a smile as he shakes his head and continues eating his breakfast.
They rarely have time like this considering how busy they are in their respective fields, Yoongi being the head engineer of a big firm and him as a lawyer for a global company. Dinner dates are only once every three months if they are lucky enough for their schedules to match or if the universe is kind enough to give them a day off at the same time.
It was hard. But they make it work.
Whoever arrives home first will prepare dinner and whoever needs to be up earlier will do breakfast. Never did they slept in another bed- always beside and holding each other. Not once did the other go to sleep or get up without kissing the other first. Random messages throughout the day. Calls on the way home to make sure that the other is safe. It was always the small and constant things that made it work.
So even if they have only been together for 4 years as boyfriends, he did not have any hesitation to say yes to Yoongi when he proposed.
And it has been two years since they wore their rings but not once did he regret anything. Because of all the wrong choices he made in his life, he finally made the right one.
He smiles as he lists down the things they would get at the supermarket before following Yoongi to the shower. Maybe having a mark or two on his neck won't be so bad.
*****
"I see someone celebrated a little early for their anniversary."
Seokjin immediately becomes red as he fixes his collar, hoping it would hide the marks his husband made earlier thay day. "Shut up. You should be glad we did not cancel on you guys today." he clears his throat, hoping to regain a bit of composure.
Namjoon laughs at his statement and offers an apology. "Of course, of course. Thanks for having us over tonight. I missed Seoul." he sips from his wine.
"Just Seoul, babe?" Hoseok pouts. "I think you forgot you left the love of your life here as well."
Seokjin rolls his eyes as Namjoon pulls Hoseok by the waist to give him a kiss. "I think I have shown you just how much I have missed you already the moment I got back." He murmurs into the kiss, making Seokjin cringe a bit more. This makes the couple laugh at his reaction. "You act as if you and Yoongi-hyung are not clingy."
Hoseok puts his arms around Seokjin's shoulder. "They're clingy when it's just the two of them. Yoongi-hyung still can't maintain eye contact though." he laughs as Seokjin nods with a sigh of defeat.
"Where are the others though? Is Jungkook and Jimin coming?" Namjoon asks, looking around the garden where the party to welcome him has been set.
Seokjin pulls out his phone to check for any messages. "Jungkook is on his way with his boyfriend." he pauses. "And Jimin- Jimin's coming with his Taehyungie, of course." he coos. "I'm surprised they're still coming despite just arriving from France this morning."
"It's Jimin. What do you expect?" Hoseok says in a matter-of-fact way. "He flew from Paris to Seoul for a day just greet Jungkook because we were all busy in the morning. Of course, he will be here for Namjoon too."
"Look who's here."
They all turn towards Yoongi who just arrived. And behind him is a bright-eyed boy who was practically bouncing towards them.
"Jungkook-ah, you might trip!" his boyfriend, Yugyeom, calls after him. He almost does, if it weren't for Hoseok who readily catches him.
"Kookie! My Kookie!" he chants as he engulfs him in a hug.
"I missed you guys, so much!" Jungkook pouts. "Especially you, hyung!" he turns towards Namjoon who just gave him a pat on the head. "Oh, I'm giving you a forehead kiss. Come here!"
Namjoon backs away and starts running, with Jungkook tailing right behind him.
Seokjin then looks at Yugyeom who gives them a bow as a greeting. "Sorry about that. They like teasing Namjoon." he says, to which the other just profusely says that it was okay and that he didn't mind. "It's nice to see you again, Yugyeom-" he tenses when he feels an arm snake around his waist and then squeezes him lightly. He looks at Yoongi who just sips from his wine glass and feigns innocence.
"So now, we're only missing the other couple then?" Hoseok asks as he looks at Namjoon and Jungkook who are now on the swing set, probably looking at the pictures his boyfriend took while he was in LA.
Seokjin nods. "I should take out the other drinks and food then, so that all are ready when they arrive and we can just catch up already."
Hoseok offers to help him, and then asks Yugyeom to come with them, leaving Yoongi sipping on his wine on the other end of the pool area alone.
Yep. They're only missing one couple. He takes a big gulp of his drink. Yoongi wonders if he is ready to see them again.
*****
"It's unfair." Hoseok slurs his words. "Seokjin-hyung and Jimin are already married!" Namjoon takes his drink from his hand. "Is it because they both have such pretty lips?" he starts making kissy faces. "Namjoon! You also have the same lips! But you're not married!"
His boyfriend laughs. "Not yet, babe."
"Maybe-" hiccup. "Maybe I should be the one to propose to you." Hoseok manages to say as he toys with one of the buttons of Namjoon's top.
Namjoon just smiles, watching his drunk boyfriend in his arms. "Maybe if you didn't kiss me senseless the moment I arrived, I would've been able to get down on my knees to do something else-"
"Hyung!" Jungkook whines, already red from getting flustered from what he just heard, already imagining certain things , making his hyungs laugh. The youngest just ends up burying his face on Yugyeom's chest who just giggles at how shy he got.
They were confused when Taehyung suddenly stood up and took Hoseok's hands. "Do it, hyung! That's how I proposed to my Minnie! I just did it!" he smiles and the two lightweights nod at each other, just saying "Do it!" and "I'll do it!" to one another while the others just watch them fondly.
"I keep forgetting Taehyungie is also quick to get drunk." Namjoon laughs as he gets another can of beer. "He married Jimin, the resident drunkard of our group so my brain automatically tells me he's with the same alcohol tolerance."
"That's because Jimin-ssi learned drinking from the original drunkard of our group!" Jungkook laughs but eventually stops as he gets a realization. "I actually have never seen hyung get drunk." he says as his gaze turns towards Yoongi.
Yoongi, on the other hand, was just sitting with his legs crossed, with his glass of whiskey in his hand. "And you never will."
"Aww, just this night, hyung. Please!" Jungkook pouts but Yoongi just shakes his head no.
"You should give up, Koo." Jimin finally stands up to take Taehyung back to their seat. "Even I have never seen him get drunk. And his alcohol tolerance is not even that high back in college." Yoongi looks up and meets his eyes for the first time that night. "What more now." Jimin was the first to look away as he makes Taehyung sit down and hug a throw pillow.
"Maybe I should get you drunk then." Seokjin turns to him with a sly smile. But even then Yoongi shakes his head. "But why not?" his husband whines.
"Because-" he takes a sip. "I have seen you get a hangover. I know it's not good."
Seokjin pouts and holds his hand. "Please, love? Just one night? It will also be a good way to test how high your tolerance is now."
That makes Yoongi stop and look at him. Part of him still wants to decline because he was fine with just knowing he can drink a lot but still be able to walk straight. But when he saw Taehyung lean over to kiss Jimin, he figured he really needs more alcohol to get through the night and so, he says yes.
He has lost count. How many shots of tequila was that just before he started to feel dizzy? And then more alcohol- different types and brands. They really made him taste test everything. And he was definitely starting to feel the regret of drinking now.
Seokin was laughing as he sits Yoongi back down after taking one more shot of tequila, seeing him staggering and definitely struggling to get back in his seat. "Are you drunk now?" he asks.
He should meow. Yeah- meowing is good. That will get the message across. And so he meows. But he thinks he did it wrong because everyone started laughing.
"He's drunk, definitely." Seokjin smiles as he makes him lean on his seat, brushing his hair back. "You look cute when you're drunk, love."
"You should probably take him upstairs to get some rest, hyung." Namjoon says as he takes the glass of brandy away from Yoongi. "Does he have work tomorrow?"
"No-" Yoongi hiccups. "I planned a romantic trip for me and Seokjinnie for the whole week!" He pulls Namjoon closer. "But don't tell him, it's a surprise." he shushes, but his voice was loud enough for everyone to hear.
Jungkook giggles as he makes his way towards his drunk hyung. "Yoongi-hyung! Do you love me?"
"Of course! You-" hiccup . "You are my favorite dongsaeng! A cute-" hiccup . "Bunny!" Yoongi even pinches his cheeks and pulls him closer to kiss both of it, making everyone coo over the interaction.
"Hyung." Namjoon sits down in front of him. "I'll probably propose to Hoseok tomorrow. Do you think I should do it?"
Yoongi nods. "You should. You should always hold on to the one that you love." he smiles. "You should-" hiccup. "-do everything that you can to keep him. Because if you'll let him go, he might get taken by someone else and you'll never get him back."
Namjoon smiles at Yoongi's answer. "I guess I should've expected that answer from someone who has been in love with the same person for a long time, huh?" He turns to Seokjin with a fond smile, who, in turn, holds Yoongi's hand tightly, mirroring the same smile.
"Of course!" Yoongi announces. "I have been in love with the same person for 10 years!"
That silenced everyone.
Seokjin can feel his hand grow cold and clammy. He doesn't need to look to know that everyone's eyes are on him.
How can they not look?
Yoongi is in love with the same person for the last ten years.
He has only known Seokjin for seven.
And everyone knows there was only one person who could fit that time. And he was sitting at the back, silent at the realization, holding his now sleeping husband.
"H-hyung." Namjoon hesitantly reaches for the man standing beside him but he looks away when he sees he has already started crying. He then turns to everyone else. "It's late. We should already go." he forces a smile.
Everyone then started gathering their things but the other two remained standing there, as if time stopped just for them. Seokjin, silently sobbing at the revelation he didn't expect, and Yoongi, just trying to understand why the world is spinning around him and trying hard not to fall off his seat.
Seokjin does try to compose himself when his guests came to bid them goodbye. But he almost lost it when Jimin came closer, holding his husband close. Their eyes meet but both were unsure of what to say.
And there was a lot to say.
Because he was the ten years. Yoongi's first boyfriend. Yoongi's first love. His first everything. He had been there before Seokjin even entered Yoongi's life. But he didn't know that he still was, even when Seokjin was already there.
"I'm sorry." was all the other was able to say.
And a single tear was all Seokjin could reply, along with a sad smile.
Because he was not the enemy. He was not the one to blame. He didn't do anything. He was just- simply there . Yet he was the one to offer an apology.
Or maybe, it was sympathy.
Pity.
Because Seokjin was only there for seven years, but Yoongi was already at ten.
There really was nothing else to say but sorry .
*****
It was fortunate that Yoongi fell asleep the moment Jin tucked him in bed. He was able to change his clothes and wash him with a small towel as he cries his heart out.
At least his husband won't see him like this. He wouldn't know how much he broke him.
Because knowing Yoongi, he probably won't be able to forgive himself to tell the one truth he has been hiding for years. He won't forgive himself for making his husband cry.
Because that's how he is. The perfect husband- one who will make you believe it's you, always just you, even when it's just a bold-faced lie.
He stops wiping him when he feels Yoongi's hand on his face. "You're taking care of me." His husband says, words still a bit slurred.
Seokjin takes Yoongi's hand off him and wipes it with a warm towel. "Of course, I have to take care of you." he forces a smile.
"I have the best boyfriend in the world. I should never have broken up with you." Yoongi replies, which makes Seokjin still. He feels his hand on his face again. Yoongi has sat up on the bed, facing him. "You really have the prettiest lips, Min. Can I get a kiss?"
He feels Yoongi's lips on his before he can even answer. His tears won't stop- not after knowing the fact that all this kisses and gazes on his lips were not for him. But for Min.
When he woke up that morning, it definitely felt like any other. A familiar weight by his shoulder, the same warmth he has grown accustomed to sprawled all over his body- even breaths that he can feel through their chests under the covers- and yet Seokjin didn't know he would be surprised by the end of the day with the truth that in the 6 years of being together, Yoongi was actually in love with someone else.
He lets himself be pulled to bed just as he hears the clock on their bedside table struck midnight. He lies awake, thinking how today was supposed to be not like the other days - but definitely not like this.
Yet he wakes up to the same weight and warmth on him- the same man on the same bed. But now it all feels different.
Seokjin was still in a daze when he feels something press against his lips. "Good morning." his husband greets. He's unsure of whether he should feel relieved that Yoongi doesn't seem to remember last night or hurt that his husband seems to be able to put all of it behind him just like that- the way he does everyday. But at least he was still able to force a smile as an answer. "My head hurts." Yoongi murmurs as he buries his face on the crook of Seokjin's neck again.
"Take the day off." he manages to say.
"I can't. I'm bringing my husband on an anniversary trip he deserves." Yoongi smiles as he struggles to get up. Seokjin just watches him from their bed as he makes his way to the door. He was just about to leave the room when Yoongi turns to him and says, "Happy anniversary, love. I love you."
Now he can't unlearn the fact that his husband says it to his lips, rather than looking at him in the eye.