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She is angry. She is frustrated.
But mostly, she is hurt.
Pacing in her rooms back and forth, she grows more and more furious with her uncle.
How dare he stoke the flames or her desire so high and with such ferocity only to leave her to deal with the aftermath all by herself.
How dare he show her what it feels like to finally have what she's been dreaming of for years… only to take it away just as quickly.
For a few dark moments she considers going to Ser Cole, confident she'd be able to seduce him and get what she wants.
But that's just it, isn't it?
That's not what she wants.
She doesn't want a warm body to find a release with. She doesn't want someone to help with her frustration and the fire burning under her skin.
She wants… him.
No one else.
She throws herself to the bed, curling into a ball, trying to ignore the pulsing between her legs… and the ache in her chest.
Why did he push her away?
Why did he look so appalled after showing nothing but enthusiasm the entire time?
Did she… do it wrong?
Slowly she falls asleep, with her uncle's voice in her ear, his phantom kisses on her skin.
The next time she sees him, it's in her father's presence.
She gapes at her father, trying so very hard to ignore her uncle's still form just to his right.
"Wed him? You cannot be serious," she hisses with more poison than she feels deep inside. "He already has a wife!" She waves in his direction, still not willing to turn and see the regret and guilt surely residing on his beautiful face.
"Not for long," her uncle says, low and with a dangerous edge.
She swallows, connecting her hands behind her back, rubbing them together nervously.
The king sighs, giving Daemon a tired look. "Don't make it sound so ominous, brother. I am simply allowing an annulment," he explains.
She doesn't understand what's happening.
Her father agrees… no, her father wants her to marry Daemon?
Nevermind that it's all she's ever wanted in her heart, ever since she was old enough to know what husband means. Nevermind that in her vision of the future, he was always there by her side.
Nevermind that. It was always only a naïve wish of a young girl infatuated with her uncle. She knew it could never be.
She knew it was an impossible, beautiful, stupid dream.
"Why?" she asks out loud and her voice breaks, embarrassingly, uncovering her weakness.
"I asked my brother," Daemon says, taking a step towards her. And she cannot fight the pull any longer. The longing strumming between them. Finally, she sets her eyes on him, searching his face for an answer.
Why are you doing this?
What are you getting out of this?
… Why did you push me away?
"I asked him for the only person I ever wanted to wed." His voice is still low but soft, so much gentler than it was last night in her ear. No longer roughened by desire but full of tenderness she doesn't know what to do with.
"I told you, Rhaenyra," her father's voice sounds in the background while she keeps her gaze fixed on the object of her ire. "I told you to choose a husband that makes you happy."
Her heart constricts, remembering how happy she was last night. Holding his hand, laughing with him, being chased by him, kissing him. She's never been as happy.
"Well, yes, I…"
It's too much.
Too much happening at once.
"Do I not make you happy, princess?" he asks in a broken whisper, as if only the mere idea crushes him.
She blinks away the pesky tears threatening to overflow.
She wants to be angry. She wants to yell at him, to shake him, to kiss him and never stop.
But still she cannot deny the truth.
Before she can breathe out Yes. Before she can scream out No one makes me happier - her father speaks again.
"I gave you my word. And I will honour it. If this match doesn't please you, I won't allow it."
Despite her wariness, a tiny, treacherous thread of hope flutters in her chest.
Could this really be? Could she truly have all she's ever wanted?
Could this… be the reason he stopped last night? Did he, perhaps, want their first time to be in a soft and comfortable bed, just the two of them, a husband and wife ?
Lost in her thoughts, she can't tear her eyes away from his own intense gaze.
Yes, she thinks, her heart beating almost painfully hard in her chest. Yes.