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His sleep as the day approached had been getting worse.
Granted, it wasn’t like the two of you were sharing a room, but your patio door had a certain groan to it when opened. Which you had been hearing every night around midnight for the past week. The first night, you had taken a cautionary look out into the living room to make sure it wasn’t someone breaking in. However, upon seeing the familiar figure sitting himself down in one of the chairs, you decided to leave him alone for the night. Of course, being a light sleeper, you couldn’t help but notice him wandering out there night after night.
You had suspected that he would do it this night, too. You had helped Dmitri set up the additional bed in his room–a cot, really, but you had some extra padding and blankets to help make it more comfortable. It was only temporary, anyway. They’d move on eventually once things were settled enough.
The tight feeling in your gut upon that thought had you covering your eyes with the back of your arm, both frustrated and almost ashamed by it.
Murray had shown up at your door almost two years ago. It had been a late night after years of not hearing from him, so the suspicion upon his visit was something that came on rather instantly. Not that you weren’t happy to see him. After news of the earthquake in Hawkins, you had the urge to check up on a few people but didn’t know how to reach the ones that were unavailable. Still, after catching up on some things that honestly still left you somewhat reeling to recall properly, he had asked for the favor that you suspected was coming.
Your house was off the grid, so to speak. Isolated, a quiet place with a twenty minute drive into the small, road-stop town with a local grocery and a couple stores. Some nice scenery, too.
It was a good place if you didn’t want to be disturbed.
Which was also a good place to hide a man wanted by the KGB, as Murray had pointed out.
Of course, you had initially been against the idea–you didn’t want that target painted on your back by a foreign government on top of the fact that your own might take interest as well. You knew how to ‘disappear,’ sure, but that was a lot. Even for you. Still, with the favor you owed Murray dangled over your head, a week later you found a somewhat disheveled Russian man on your doorstep.
While you were still doing so begrudgingly, Dmitri admittedly had a good first impression. Kind of quiet, but polite. At least, at first. As the months went on and the two of you settled into the current situation, you noticed he had a bit of a humorous and charming side. As much as you didn’t want to admit it, you had always found yourself getting along with people like that. So, the initial distance had started to fade.
One night, while having a smoke over the quickly thrown together dinner you had put together for you both, you noticed that you had started to like him more than just a temporary house guest.
Of course, you had shoved the thoughts aside, but that only made them crop back up with a vengeance each time you failed to address them. Every time you dismissed lingering glances, you found yourself only noticing them all the more. Same with the small jokes, touches. Yet, you didn’t want to complicate things if he was just going to leave, anyway. Hell, you didn’t even know if Dmitri felt the same way.
When it seemed like he could successfully settle in America, Dmitri’s next goal was to get in contact with his son and see if he’d be willing to come live with him.
Which had certainly been more complicated and time consuming than just waiting for enough time to pass before he could start to make his own decisions. At that point, you found it hard for you to just shove him out the door. ‘Good luck finding your son. There’s a bus stop near the edge of town if you don’t want to hitchhike.’
You wanted to help. Some part was hoping that maybe in doing so, you would be able to resolve the conflicting feelings within you. Plus, it had been almost a year and a half at that point that you had been hiding Dmitri for Murray, you figured you could at least use that as a means to see if there was any way he knew how to help. There had been a number of dead ends–considering Dmitri’s status in his homeland, it wasn’t like he could just call in freely and start asking around.
He was determined, though. It wasn’t hard to miss, and a part of you had to admire that. He tried a number of different venues, looking to contact his parents, ex-wife, anybody who may have some information. Yet, sometimes the risk would be too much. The last thing you wanted was to trace all of this back to you and where you were supposed to be hiding Dmitri. Murray had, more than once, stated that fact to you. Which you couldn’t blame him for.
It was hard to see the highs of a potential outcome and the lows of the failed leads. As much as you felt like you were a background figure in all of this, you couldn’t help but feel some of that too. So, really, you should have figured that a breakthrough would come through when it felt like the options were running out.
Murray had settled upon masking a signal and making a direct call with someone who was looking after Mikhail. As much as you figured Dmitri not being able to talk to his son himself would upset him, he seemed more relieved to have made contact with him in the first place. Once it seemed like the initial suspicions had been settled, it was confirmed they could get him on American soil.
Which led you to the current night, arm slung over your eyes as you debated on getting up and talking with Dmitri.
After everything, the exhausting months of searching, you thought he would be sleeping like a baby. Yet, that apparently wasn’t the case. As much as a part of you argued to just roll over and leave it, a part of you did want to see if you could help with whatever was on his mind. You had stood by him for more than a year and half at that point.
With a small sigh, you tossed the blanket off yourself and dug around for some pants.
You weren’t sure how late it was, but judging from the darkness of the area around your patio, you could assume you hadn’t been asleep for too long. Carefully, you walked toward the door, leaning against the frame for a moment as you watched the end of his cigarette light up somewhat with an inhale.
“You’re going to be exhausted for Mikhail’s arrival tomorrow,” you commented after a couple moments.
You had been thinking he would jump at the sound of your voice, considering he hadn’t seemed to acknowledge that you were there, but he just glanced your way before blowing out some smoke.
“No more than him, I imagine,” he commented, settling further back into the chair he was sitting in.
At his words, you decided to join him, stepping out onto the cool wood of the patio and sat down in the chair next to him.
“You’re nervous,” you observed–rather boldly. Still, it wasn’t all that subtle. If you hadn’t noticed it in his body language, the sound of the patio door opening every night gave it away.
“...In a way,” Dmitri relented after a few moments, “It has almost been two years. The last time I saw him, our relationship was…strained. Somewhat.”
You nodded lightly, resting your elbow on the arm of the chair as you rubbed at your cheek somewhat in thought.
“How old is he now?” you asked after a few moments of silence.
“Sixteen.”
“You’re practically supposed to hate your parents at that age,” you replied with some mild humor, turning your head to look over at him. “The way I see it, if I were in his position, I think my father being alive would mean more to me than whatever petty issue we may have had almost two years ago. I doubt he’d move across the ocean if that wasn’t the case.”
“You do not know him,” Dmitri replied, the somewhat lighter tone giving you some relief despite his words, “he is a bit of a grudge holder.”
“Well, you can sort it out tomorrow,” you replied, lightly smacking his arm with a small grin. “This is all that’s keeping you up?”
You had a feeling that you already knew the answer to that, considering how quickly he seemed to move on from the topic of his nervousness about seeing his son again. Yet, you didn’t want to push. If that was all he wanted to say, you would leave it alone. Even while a part of you felt like you had grown close over the last while, you were hesitant to push him on anything.
For a number of reasons.
However, Dmitri’s silence following your question had you remaining where you were. He didn’t look offended or like he was going to dismiss the question–really, it seemed like he was picking his words. From your perspective, anyway.
“I know me being here was supposed to be temporary,” he said after a moment, “Yet, you have been great help. I do not really know how to thank you for that.”
“You don’t need to,” you said, waving a hand somewhat, “It didn’t feel right, just…kicking you out. I guess I’m a bleeding heart for family reunions. If you and your son want to move on, I have some connections that could help you get settled somewhere too. I don’t mind.”
You tried to ignore the strange feeling in your gut that pulled at that. You’d have to let that go eventually.
“You want us to leave?”
Naturally, the question took you off guard. You met his gaze for a few seconds, an almost queasy feeling cropping up in you. No, you wanted to say. I want you to stay. I want to see if we can be something more than just friends. Yet, you didn’t know if that was appropriate with everything that was going on. So, you took a small inhale before you shrugged.
“I’m not going to force you to do one thing or another.”
“That doesn’t answer the question,” Dmitri replied, the hint of a grin on his face but you weren’t blind to the seriousness sitting behind it.
As much as a part of you wanted to ask where he was going with this, you weren’t exactly someone who liked to beat around the bush. At least, not as much as you did with this topic. With a sigh, you leaned forward to rest your elbows on your knees, giving another small shrug as you clasped your hands together.
“I don’t think my feelings matter much in this situation,” you replied, not really bringing yourself to look in his direction again. “Yeah, of course I want you to stay. I enjoy your company, things would be different without you around here. I like you, maybe more than I should, but…well, that’s my stuff to deal with. If you want to leave, I’d be fine with that too. Whatever you think is best for you and your kid.”
It wasn’t a full fledged confession–if anything, you weren’t completely sure on where your feelings for him sat beyond knowing they weren’t completely platonic. Yet, it was a step over in a small way, but you still had your gaze on the dark treeline as you worried the skin between your fingers gently in thought.
“Look at me a moment.”
While in the back of your mind you had registered him shifting closer to you, catching his knee out of the corner of your eye, his voice was much closer than you were expecting it to be. The demand was unexpected, too, though there was a certain quality to it that made it hard to ignore. While it was a demand, it almost sounded like a request at the same time.
Still, it was difficult to do so, considering that you had your damn heart in your throat. Eventually, you did, meeting his gaze for a couple moments but it felt like you were taking him in for whole minutes. While Dmitri was never exactly rough in his interactions with you, there was a distance at points. Some things weighed on him, sometimes, and given what little you did know, it wasn’t hard to understand why they would. In the moment, there was some sort of warmth in his gaze.
While you knew it was a little too intimate to result in a quick hug or thank you, you were still surprised when you felt him press his mouth against your own. Despite that, you responded almost instantly, shutting your eyes and pressing back into the kiss. You brought your hand up to cup the side of his head, resting your free hand on his shoulder as he pulled you a little closer. The hand that came up to cradle the side of your head was somewhat cool from the night’s air, the inside of your legs brushing his somewhat.
It was a somewhat awkward position, but that didn’t seem to matter. The odd time you found yourself wondering what it would be like to kiss him, it had always been a sort of quick, heat of the moment type of thing. Usually taking him by surprise, as you figured he likely didn’t feel the same way.
So, this little late night visit was turning those ideas on their heads, considering there wasn’t really anything too questioning about the way Dmitri kissed you.
You were the one left surprised, which certainly was still left with you when the kiss was finally broken. However, in the back of your mind, you knew that you would have to admit to a few things you had willingly turned your gaze from that might have hinted toward this.
“So, does that mean you’re staying or…?” you asked, failing to keep a straight face near the end as you let out a breathless laugh.
“No, I just kiss everybody who gives me a bed like that.”