Chapter Text
Inuyasha wanted to run.
He could easily make his escape unnoticed. Nobody had seen him yet and his enhanced abilities would make stealthing back through the library entrance no problem. But he was frozen where he stood, clinging to the strap of his backpack flung over his shoulder for dear life. Because it was her that he could hear sniffling from the study tables beyond the row of bookshelves that hid her from view. The scent of her tears hit him like a bag of bricks and made his heart drop into the depths of his stomach. He hated when people cried. Especially Kagome Higurashi, his best friend who had never done anything in her life to deserve being sad enough to shed tears like this. But she was a bleeding heart who was dangerously sympathetic to everyone around her, often taking on their pain as her own and transforming it into acceptance and friendship. It’s what she had done for him.
It was one of the things that made him fall in love with her.
Not that he would ever tell her. No, that was his burden to bear. Because if life taught him anything, it was that the hanyou doesn’t get the girl and he didn’t want to ruin their friendship anyway just because of some stupid love confession. Knowing her, she would just kindly smile at him and turn him down politely then pretend it never happened the way she did with Hojo and Koga when they had confessed to her. But Inuyasha would never be able to get over that rejection. He didn’t think he could handle it if that was directed at him and everything he held dear came crashing down around him.
He hadn’t loved her immediately. In fact, he thought he hated Kagome from the very second she had approached him to ask if he would partner with her in science class almost one year ago. But after study sessions fueled by junk food that always turned into late-night conversations until he had to carry her back to her house because she had fallen asleep, it hadn’t taken long for him to fall hard even before he was aware of it himself. She was his constant, the one thing in his life that felt guaranteed. And he’d be damned if he lost it because of his own weakness for her.
So Inuyasha kept his mouth shut whenever they were together, either alone or with Miroku and Sango, who they had befriended after sharing a lab table in the very same science class. They had hit it off immediately. Well, Kagome did and Inuyasha was just there, but he had warmed up to them after a while and now they were inseparable, always hanging out at the arcade or the movies on the weekends. For the first time in his life, he felt like a normal teenager; the merciless bullying and family tragedy in his early youth almost meant nothing to him when he was with his friends. If he lost Kagome, that would all be over. He owed her his life. He had nothing without her.
Which was why he couldn’t just ignore her when he knew she was crying just a few feet away from him. He was bad at consoling her, never knowing what to say so he usually just sat there and let her cry on his shoulder while he tried to stammer out words of encouragement, but after a while, her tears always dried. He assumed just having someone to vent to was what helped so if he could be that person for her now, why wouldn’t he?
Inuyasha’s legs felt like lead as he walked down the aisle of shelves that would end up where the desks were, but he had a purpose. And when he saw her there, confirming what he already knew, his heart lurched at the sight.
She was all alone hunched over the table, her head in her hands as she quietly cried, her back wracking with every muffled sniffle. Books were strewn about her, some open, some stacked in a pile as tall as her. Even as he approached her, she didn’t even notice he was there, which was unusual for her. She always knew when he was around as if she could sense him. Whatever she was crying about must have completely distracted her.
“Oi Kagome, what’s wrong?” he asked, his harsh voice way too loud in the quiet room and she jumped at it, her head snapping up to see him standing across from her. He could see her eyes were red and puffy, her nose a soft shade of pink, and even still he couldn’t help but think she was still effortlessly pretty.
“Inuyasha,” she wiped away a tear that had rolled down her cheek. “I should’ve known you would find me.”
He didn’t know what that meant, but he slid into the empty seat opposite her, flinging his backpack on the table with a crash. Somewhere in the distance, he heard the librarian shush him, but he ignored her like he always did. “Keh, not like I was looking for you. I came here to study only to find you sniveling in a corner by yourself. I don’t know how I’m supposed to get any work done with you distracting me,” he teased.
She looked down at her hands fiddling with her pencil. “I’m sorry, Inuyasha. I know I’m always such a burden to you and everyone else.”
No, that was not what he meant. Shit. Shit. What was he supposed to say now?
“Wait, I didn’t—” he started, but the rest got caught in his throat. Kagome looked up at him and something in her expression changed on her face. Her eyes softened before she turned her head back down and released a sigh.
“I’m a failure. No matter how hard I try.”
“Huh?” This was so unlike her. Usually, she was all smiles until she got worked up and unleashed her emotions all at once. But she had a fiery spirit and a determination to face any obstacle in her path. Never before had he heard her sound so defeated. “What the hell is this all about?”
Kagome dropped her pencil and pushed her notebook away. “Math. I don’t understand any of this and I’m going to fail our test next week. And if I fail, then I’ll never get into college with you. And if I don’t get into college, then you’ll leave me behind while I have to start this year all over again. And if I get held back, then I’ll be a disgrace to my family. And—”
“Whoa whoa whoa, hold on. First off, you’re crying because of some test? Do you know how many I’ve failed and in the grand scheme of things, it never even mattered? Second, I ain’t ever leaving you even if you’re in high school until you’re 25.”
“Inuyasha!” she sounded annoyed as she leaned forward to swat his arm, but the corners of her lips were turning up almost against her will.
“What, it’s true. But I’ve seen how hard you study. You’re gonna do just fine.”
“Easy for you to say,” She rested her chin in her hand, lips forming into an adorable pout. “You’re naturally good at math.”
“Am not. What did you think I was coming in here to study for?”
“And here I am distracting you. I’m sorry, Inuyasha, I’ll shut up now.” She shook her head at herself and Inuyasha could see new tears forming, making her beautiful brown eyes glisten.
“Would you quit apologizing? Look,” he leaned back in his chair, the front two legs coming off the floor while he maintained perfect balance. “You’re obviously upset and I know you won’t be able to focus. So why don’t we take a break and get some food then you can come over to my place and we’ll figure it out together. Mom’s working late tonight so it’d just be me by myself anyway.”
“Take a break? But you haven’t even started yet.”
“And I just realized I was hungry so now I want dinner. How ‘bout ice cream?”
“Ice cream for dinner?” she looked at him incredulously, but her little giggle had his heart soaring. Maybe he wasn’t so bad at this after all. Or maybe he just knew that ice cream was Kagome’s favorite food and that always cheered her up.
“Yeah, why not? You have dinner plans at home?”
“Nope, let me text my mom I’ll be home late.” She pulled out her phone and began typing up a message. “Can we go to Kaede’s?”
“Duh, where else would we go?”
Kaede’s was a local ice cream shop that Inuyasha and his friends frequented. So often, in fact, that the owner knew them on a first-name basis. She had become like a grandma to all of them, but Inuyasha would never admit how much the old woman actually meant to him. Some places didn’t even allow hanyou beyond their doors, but Kaede had welcomed him the very second they set foot inside. She was kind to him, but still never put up with his attitude and somehow that only endeared her to him all the more.
Today was no different, greeting them with a warm smile and letting them try as many samples as they wanted, even though they had already tasted every flavor in the store. Inuyasha bought her two scoops of her favorite, cookie dough in a sprinkle cone, and nothing on this earth could compare to the smile on her face when he put it in her hands, beaming up at him without a single trace of a tear or frown.
“Thank you, Inuyasha. For everything,” she told him before rising up to her tiptoes to press a kiss to his cheek then practically skipped off to find them a table. He was dumbfounded. He was speechless. He was turning into a puddle at her feet as he touched the spot where his skin was now practically buzzing with electricity.
At that moment, he made her a solemn vow to always protect that smile from anything that could ever take it away. That was his smile, the one he had only ever seen her give to him.
The sound of a throat clearing made him realize how blatantly he had been staring after the girl. Turning his head back to Kaede to slam some cash on the counter, he stalked off to the table Kagome had found, ignoring Kaede’s knowing smile when he realized she had seen it all.
Other than her brief breakdown in the library, it was shaping up to be a perfect day. Any day with Kagome beside him already was. But he had forgotten one thing. The weather forecast.
“Don’t forget to take your umbrella to school today!” his mother had reminded him that morning before she kissed him on the forehead while he practically inhaled his cereal.
“Whatever, mom,” he had grumbled after her as she left for her long shift at the hospital. And, like an idiot, he had forgotten. It didn’t matter to him anyway. It was just water. But now as Inuyasha and Kagome were trapped underneath the awning outside Kaede’s shop watching the rain pour down around them, he realized he made a big mistake. Even if he were to run full speed, they would be soaked by the time they made it back to Inuyasha’s apartment. So they waited for the worst of it to pass, but even after twenty minutes, it still didn’t look to be letting up anytime soon.
Kagome shivered beside him and rubbed at her arms, a clear sign she was cold. Despite the blue jacket of her uniform, she still had that short plaid skirt on, and while he was grateful that he got to see the shape of her legs, it was no wonder she was chilly with the air whipping around them.
“Let’s just go back inside,” Inuyasha told her, taking off his own jacket to drape across her shoulders. But she just shook her head.
“I like being out here with you. Besides, we already finished our ice cream. We don’t want to take up space at a table if we’re already done.”
“I don’t think Kaede would mind actually—”
But he was cut off by Kagome wrapping her arm around his and leaning in closer, the warmth of her body pressing against his side. Inuyasha stiffened, completely unsure of what to do with his limbs now. How did he normally stand when she wasn’t so close to him? He suddenly couldn’t remember so he just stood there, looking up at the rain falling from the sky as if it could somehow give him the answers.
“Inuyasha,” she said his name so softly he probably wouldn’t have been able to hear it over the rain if he wasn’t a hanyou. For once, he was grateful for the dog ears on his head that he used to have been made fun of for. But that was the thing about Kagome, all the parts of himself that he hated, she had called beautiful until he started to believe it, too. He looked down at her, her face so close to his with a soft blush dusting across her cheeks, and it was like nothing else existed. He couldn’t hear the rain, her sweet vanilla scent consumed him, all he saw was her big doe eyes looking back at him.
“Thank you for bringing me here.”
“You already thanked me, dummy. Besides, you would do the same for me.”
That was absolutely true. Countless times she had made him ramen just because he was in a grumpy mood. She probably didn’t realize that it was actually her that had made him feel better, although the food had been a nice peace offering.
“Still. You didn’t have to take me here and you didn’t have to offer to study with me. It means a lot.” She rested her head on his shoulder and squeezed his arm tighter. Inuyasha really thought he might die. That his soul was about to ascend to the heavens but even if it tried, he doubted Kagome would have actually let him go. She was always naturally clingy with him, grabbing his sleeve or leaning against him and every time it set him on fire. Inuyasha just grumbled like he always did, but really times like this with her were when he was happiest.
“You know,” Kagome continued and he could feel her shift slightly, almost as if she seemed nervous. “Our one year friend-iversary is coming up.”
“Yeah? You’ve actually been keeping track?”
“In exactly one week, we will officially have been friends for one year. At least, that’s the day that we partnered up in science class. Do you remember that?”
“Course I do. Though I wouldn’t exactly say we were friends at first.”
“Of course you wouldn’t. You nearly bit my head off when I asked if we could work together.”
“Yeah, cause I figured you just pitied me for not having anyone else to buddy up with.”
“That’s not true! I mean, yeah, you were such a loner back then, but I didn’t approach you out of pity.”
“Then why did you ask to be my partner that day? I kinda always wanted to ask.”
Kagome paused, fiddling with the seam of Inuyasha's sleeve with her fingers. “I always really admired you, ok?” She refused to meet his widening eyes, keeping her gaze focused on her hands. “Even though you were alone, you never let anyone push you around. I saw how you stood up to Koga and his wolf friends when they tried to pick on you, but you weren't even phased. I wanted to be brave like you.”
“Kagome, you’re the bravest person I’ve ever met. You even scare me sometimes.”
“Only because you bring it out in me. Plus, you always looked so cool sitting in the back of class with your arms crossed looking like you wanted to be anywhere else. Most people thought you were just a delinquent who was only up to trouble, yet you somehow always made good grades. I knew there was more to you than you were letting on. And when I found out your mom was a widow just like my mom, I felt like we had a connection there. Like you would understand how hard it can be sometimes.”
She glanced up at him, then back down, mumbling something so low that not even Inuyasha could hear her. “Wait, what was that?”
Kagome took a deep sigh, her head dipping in embarrassment. “I also thought your dog ears were cute.”
Inuyasha’s said ears twitched at her words. “You always say they’re cute.” Why be shy about it now?
“Not just that. You were—still are—the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen. Everything about you, your hair, your eyes, your claws. You wouldn’t be you without them and I always caught myself staring just because I thought you were breathtaking, especially when you sat by the window so the light would hit you in just the right way. I don’t know how nobody else ever saw it.”
Now that was different. She often gave him compliments, usually to show what a big “softie” he was when he practically turned to mush. But never had she phrased it like that. He almost felt bad because he hadn’t noticed Kagome at all even though they had been in the same class for weeks. He just kept his head down and built up his walls until everyone was just a blur to him.
Then she came in and tore them down with her kind smile and sweet laugh. Now, even he could admit that she was stunning and he kept finding little things about her that drove him crazy when they were perfectly ordinary on anyone else. The way the hairs at her neck would curl in wisps when she wore a ponytail. The little crinkle on her nose when she laughed. The eight perfect freckles on her left arm. He was hooked on all the small details, seeking them out whenever she was near enough, but he thought he had been the only one really looking.
“I—um—I was going to wait and tell you this on the actual day of our friend-iversary, but I don’t want to wait anymore,” she continued, slipping her hand into his tentatively, as if seeing how he would react to it. When he said nothing and made no move to pull away, she continued. “I—I have feelings for you, Inuyasha. Real feelings. I didn’t even know I did at first, but when we had that really big fight and I didn’t see you for like ten days straight, I suddenly realized that I was falling in love with my best friend and I didn’t want to be in a world without you.”
Inuyasha remembered that fight well. He couldn’t even remember what stupid thing it had been about, but even with the absolute mess of a life he had had growing up, nothing compared to the devastation when he thought he had lost her. But because Kagome was the kind soul that she was, she had forgiven him before he even had the chance to crawl back to her.
“I mean, you put up with me, you make me laugh, you cheer me up with ice cream just because you found me crying over a stupid test. I never stood a chance against you and I don’t want to. So even if you don’t feel the same, I just needed to get that off my chest because I didn’t want to live a lie anymore.”
Inuyasha knew he was blushing in a way that matched the same color on Kagome’s cheeks, continuing to look down at her as she avoided his gaze. He really didn’t know what else to say. He hardly even believed that they were having this conversation right now, almost as if he was an outsider watching from his own body. But seeing her lift their joined hands to press her soft lips to his knuckles, fueled something in him to take action. He wanted this. He just had to claim it.
“Are you dumb?” he realized the words were way too harsh the second they left his lips, but they were the first thing off the top of his head. Kagome flinched at first, but when she looked up and saw the completely serious look in his eyes, those big, doe eyes glistened with hope. She opened her mouth to speak but Inuyasha was already taking her face in his hands and kissing her the way he had only dreamed of. Though she stiffened for a moment from the pure shock of his sudden boldness, Kagome melted into him, gripping the front of his shirt to pull him impossibly closer. Soft, yet firm, he brushed his lips against hers and it was perfect, better than he could ever have imagined to suddenly know her in a completely new way.
Even after they pulled apart, he couldn’t bear to go too far, brushing her nose with his own before resting his forehead against hers. She released a single hum of laughter and he couldn’t help the turning up of his lips.
“Does this mean you feel the same way?” Kagome asked him, her voice like the chiming of bells.
“Hell yeah,” was all he needed to say and she knew exactly the depths of everything he had ever felt for her without even needing to say it.
He started to lean back into her lips but just before they could connect, the sound of a door opening had them practically shoving away from each other. Inuyasha scratched at his temple while Kagome twiddled her thumbs, attempting to look nonchalant but failing miserably.
“Oh, good. You two haven’t left yet.” It was Kaede who stepped out from inside the store. Inuyasha refused to meet her eye, but he could tell without looking that she was kindly smiling at them. “It’s pouring out here and won’t stop for quite a while so I thought you might need this.”
She held up an umbrella to Kagome and she took it in her hands, holding it like it was the greatest gift she had ever received. “Kaede, thank you so much! Won’t you need it though? It’s still pouring out.”
“Don’t worry, I keep a spare here just in case. Now you two go enjoy the rest of your day and have fun!”
And though an eyepatch covered her right eye, Inuyasha could have sworn she winked at him. When she disappeared back into the store, Kagome opened the umbrella and he promptly took it to hold over her. “Back to my place now? I don’t mind carrying you so we get there faster.”
She nodded, beaming up at him as she retook his arm. “Can we just walk though? I want to spend more time with you, just like this.”
“You just want to procrastinate studying.”
“That, too. Now come on!”
She practically dragged him out from the covered patio and, though they had walked this way so many times, this felt different. They were still just Inuyasha and Kagome, but this time they were together. This was happening. It was the realest thing in his life and he was prepared to treasure it every single day.
Everything somehow looked more colorful despite the dulled sky and when they came to their favorite spot, a pedestrian bridge overlooking the city, he ignored everyone around him to kiss her just because he could. And though the rain still poured around them, when she smiled at him, he could only see the sun.