Chapter Text
Chris tossed the shot glass back, tipping back in his seat with it. It burned down his throat.
"So what's the matter? I can tell something's up."
He sat the glass back down. "Nothing's wrong, man." Chris said.
Josh laughed, shook his head. "I won't push it, dude." He poured himself a shot.
Chris leaned back against the couch seat and looked around at Josh's room. He had Evil Dead posters and various horror related items strewn about. There were clothes scattered on the floor and his shoes he had kicked off as soon as they walked in. A cork board above his desk had polaroids tacked to it. One of him and his sisters dressed as the witches from Hocus Pocus for halloween. Another was a shot he had taken of Chris after he had face-planted while snowboarding.
"Oh my god, just spit it out. You're practically Dracula with all this brooding."
Chris heard the clunk of the shot glass being sat back down. He had his head pressed back against the headrest of the couch, not willing to look at Josh for what he said next. "Josh, it was so embarrassing. Like, I don't even know where to start."
Josh leaned back next to him. "Start at the beginning, dum-dum."
"I ran into Chrissy Jackson at the park today." He said to the ceiling.
He felt Josh turn sharply to look at him. "This story better end up naked and fast."
Chris gave a puff of a laugh but didn't look at him still. "Yeah right, man. So we're talking normally right and I mean, she's not even on my radar because, you know...Ashley. Anyway, all of a sudden she's like, 'You wanna go makeout?'"
Josh sat up straighter, jostling the couch. "Holy shit!"
Chris quickly continued. "And I didn't even think I understood her at first? But she said it again and I think I muttered alright but next thing I know we're sitting on a bench, kissing." Josh exclaims again next to him but Chris shakes his head. "I didn't really know what I was doing, I barely even know Chrissy-"
Josh laughed. "Oh, everyone knows Chrissy. She's got accolades upon accolades under her belt, if you catch my drift."
"Yeah, well after a minute of me fumbling around she pats my face and tells me she has to go." Chris flops his head to the side with despair and looks at Josh. "She gave me this sad look and told me I had fish lips!"
Josh is stunned for a second then falls forward laughing. Chris covered his face. "It isn't funny! She told me to work on it and then call her sometime."
Josh wiped at his eyes. "Fuck, I'm sorry but what a way to have your first kiss. Chrissy has taken the lip virginity of half the town at this point, but what a scathing review of your performance!"
"I just figured it wasn't a big deal; practicing with someone else so I don't blow it with Ashley but turns out, I'm a dud!"
Josh patted his arm. "Relax, relax! No one is a casanova right out the gate. Do you remember when I told you about mine? Penelope Rister in 6th grade. I stuck my tongue in her mouth and got cut on her braces!"
Chris manages a laugh at that. "You had to explain to your mom why your tongue was swollen because you kept slurring."
Josh lifts a toast with a laugh and drinks. "Not my suavest moment." He turns back to him. "Chrissy didn't say you were helpless, she even gave you an opening for some other time!"
"Dude, any confidence I had has been smashed. I can't see her again."
He snapped his fingers. "Which is exactly why I'm going to help you out."
Chris heard the grandfather clock strike midnight somehwere in the mansion. He told his parents he would be heading home around now. "How? You gonna set me up with some babe whose a kissing master?"
"Yes actually," Josh grinned. "You're looking at him."
They stared at each other for a moment. "You're drunk." Chris said this like a fact, not a question.
"No, no," Josh waved his hand. "Alright I'm buzzed a little but this plan would work even if I was sober."
Chris scoffed. "You're serious?" He felt like he, himself, must be drunk to even be sitting here for this conversation.
"Deadly. I've kissed plenty of people, I have experiece which I can extend to you."
Chris noticed how he said 'people' and not specifically 'girls'. "Really? Then why haven't you asked Sam out yet?" He said smugly.
"Thank you for the question, smartass. I'm playing the long game. It's all about laying the groundwork so they'll fall for you."
"Yeah 'cause you're not the one who fell years ago." Chris muttered under his breath.
Josh pointed at him. "I'm gonna choose to ignore that and still do you the favor, cochise." He leaned closer. "Now, pucker-up buttercup."
Chris laughed nervously. "Man, I don't know about this."
"Hey, if you want to level up, you gotta practice."
Why was his heart beating so fast? "Okay, fine. Lets get this over with." He took a deep breath. He didn't know what to expect. Was Josh just gonna lean over and kiss him right then? He braced himself but Josh spoke first. He held up one finger. "Number one: Never swing right outta the gate with tongue, especially if you're inexperienced. Number two: Go at the pace of the other person, unless they're turbo-cycling you're face. Number three: The more relaxed you are, the easier it is. So, unclench your hands, Hartley."
Chris looked down and flattened his palms out against his jeans. "Oh." He looked back up and Josh motioned for him to close his eyes. He screwed them shut tightly and waited. Nothing was happening. He opened one eye.
Josh covered his mouth with a laugh. "I'm sorry, I think you stopped breathing." He put his arm on the top of the couch and slowly leaned in. "Seriously, relax dude."
Josh slowly brought his lips to his. Chris's thoughts didn't fully compute for a second. It felt...fine. It didn't feel that much different than Chrissy's except she had lip gloss on and Josh had some stubble that brushed his own. What stilled him was a thousand thoughts racing in his head. Was it fine for best friends to kiss? What if Josh thought what Chrissy did? What the hell was he suppose to do with his hands? How did kissing even work?!
Josh pulled back and put his mouth near his ear. "You actually have to kiss back in this test." His breath tickled. Chris's body finally started back up but overcorrected. He grabbed Josh's face and roughly landed on his lips. Josh laughed muffledly and gently put his hands on Chris's wrists, holding his hands there but relaxing their grip. It was warm, soft. Josh was gentle, even as he adjusted, though it gave Chris a weird flutter in his chest.
Josh pulled away and it made an embarassing little smack noise when he did. Chris was glad no one else was home. He felt rooted to the couch, not sure where to look or what to say. Josh clapped his hands together once. "Good news first! You are not a salmon at kissing. Bad news, she wasn't entirely wrong though."
Chris groaned. "Awesome!" His face felt hot.
"Hold on. You just don't react much and when you did, you got overzealous." He said with a crooked smile. "Now, this time lets try frenching."
Chris nearly choked. "I'm sorry, what?" Actually making-out felt too...initimate between friends.
"It's basically the final boss in kissing, you're gonna be fine!" With both hands he gently took Chris's glasses off and sat them on the table.
"Well, now I can't even see, jackass." Chris said nervously.
Josh winked. "Wouldn't want them getting fogged up. And you're not supposed to see to kiss." He pressed his palm to the couch between them to turn towards him better. Adrenaline poured into Chris's arms and he resisted running from the room. Josh leaned a breath away and whispered, "Ready for level 2?" Chris's nervous chuckle was cut short by Josh's kiss.
It was the same as before, slow and gentle. But it felt different somehow. Chris's heart was thudding painfully and he kept his hands planted on his thighs. When Josh's tongue eased his own lips open, it was like a jolt to his nervous system. He fumbled but he tried to match what Josh was doing. The small groan Josh exhaled into his mouth told him he wasn't doing badly at the very least. And the scary thing was, Chris felt good. He felt like he was doing well and he liked this feeling of warmth sloshing around in his chest. Whether it was the bourbon or kissing Josh, he couldn't tell. The thought stopped him cold.
He pulled away quickly and stood up from the couch. Without looking at him, Chris grabbed his glasses and slid them on. "How did I do?" His voice sounded shaky to his own ears.
Josh cleared his throat. "You did fine. Chrissy had it all wrong."
Chris grabbed his bag and shoved his shoes on. "Thanks. Glad to hear it." He turned at his door to say goodnight but Josh was just behind him, making him jump.
"Sorry, man." He punched his arm softly. Josh didn't look like he had been attacked by fish lips. His cheeks were rosy and his lips were pink. Chris had trouble looking away from them, at what he had done to them just a moment ago. Josh gave him a quick hug goodnight. "Seriously, you did great. Happy to help." Then he was turning back into his room.
Chris walked on numb legs to the front door. His face felt like it was burning and he gripped his bag strap tighter. "Goodnight!" He yelled out, hoping it would carry through the house to him. He waited for a response, hand on the doorknob, but nothing. He walked home with a million thoughts. That hug at the door didn't even feel like before. It was normal, short. Josh smelled the same as he always did but an image sprang to Chris's mind of being wrapped up, kissing. That had never happened before.
Later, Chris would text an apology for it all, explaining that he had drank too much. It was a rambling text that made him cringe to read after sending it. He couldn't shake the feeling that they had just done something very stupid.