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It started with the hug at the airport. Well maybe it didn’t start at the airport but that was definitely part of it. Ever since Will was possessed by the mind flayer he could feel Mike drifting away from him. No matter how much Will tries to deny it or reconnect with Mike it never works. No matter what it’s “Eleven this” or “El needs-” Eleven Eleven Eleven. It’s driving Will insane. Will loves his sister. Nothing will ever change that but sometimes he wishes he was in her shoes. So that he could hold Mike the way she does. Or cling to him the way she does. But it won’t happen. He knows that. So he stays quiet. So how does he find himself yelling at Mike for everything he's done? He doesn’t know either.
A few hours earlier
“You’re the heart Mike. Remember that. You’re the heart!” Will yelled. Mike looked at him with a panicked expression but nodded. Will would’ve listened to what he said if he didn’t see his sister on a table struggling to breathe. But one thing that did catch his ear was
“Eleven, I feel like my life started that day I found you in the woods.” What…
Will started to hear ringing in his ears. Almost like a static. Tears threatening to spill. The day will went missing is the day that Mike's life started? Is that what he heard? The day Will’s childhood was ripped away from him is the day Mike's life started. Will felt like he was gonna throw up. Or cry. Or scream. He ran out of the kitchen and out to the van. Jonathan gave him a worried look but turned his attention back to El. He slid down the wall with his knees up to his chest and sobbed. He couldn’t catch his breath. He put his hand over his mouth to silence his sobs, but it didn’t really help. He felt like he was dying. Like his heart just got ripped out of his chest. No matter how much Will tried to calm himself his brain went back to “My life started that day we found you in the woods.” And he sobbed harder. He couldn't believe Mike would say something like that. Will knows that he and Mike aren’t as close as they used to be but he didn’t realize it was that bad. He thought they had talked it out. That they were “best friends” again like Mike said. But maybe he was lying. Maybe Mike never wanted him to come back from the upside down. Maybe Mike saw Will as a burden. He felt like his world was crumbling, like-
“Will?” It was Johnathan. He looked like he just found a lost puppy.
“Johnathan..” Will said and Johnathan sat next to him.
“Are you okay?” Jonathan asked him, then he just broke. He gripped onto Johnathan and cried. He just cried and cried. And Johnathan stayed with him.
—-
Everyone was back in the van. Eleven ended up being okay. Will was being distant from everyone. He was sitting the farest he could away from everyone. Will sat in a ball in the corner trying to sleep. He didn’t even feel upset anymore. He just felt heavy, tired. He just wanted to close his eyes and never wake up. He didn’t want to speak to Mike or anyone really. He didn't really know why the comment stuck with him that much. But maybe it wasn’t just that one comment. He didn’t really know but he didn’t really care either.
“Okay we're gonna stop at this gas
station and then we’re driving the rest of the way to Hawkins. Okay?” Johnathan stated and everyone nodded.
He put the van in park and everyone got out. It was night time and there was no one at the gas station besides them and the workers. Will sat at a picnic table in an area attached to the gas station and sat down. He put his head down until he heard the wood creak and felt the bench shift.
“Hey.” It was Mike.
Will lifted his head to look at Mike then put it back down.
“Are you okay?” Mike asked. But Will still kept his mouth shut. He felt even more heavy, like a bolder was placed on top of him.
“Will? Did something happen-”
“I'm fine Mike.” Will snapped. Mike looked confused. Hurt almost.
“Did I do something?” Mike asked. Will slowly turned his head towards Mike and he felt something in him snap.
“Did you do something?” Will laughed.
“Did you do something? Like you didn't just start completely ignoring me after I got possessed by the mind flayer.”
“What?”
“Oh don’t act dumb!” Will yelled. “Ever since that summer you’ve just been completely ignoring everyone except for Eleven. That summer was a complete mess and then we left. You basically stopped talking to me for a year! A year Mike! While Eleven gets letters from you basically every other day!”
“But-” Mike started but Will cut him off.
“No! Don’t even say that’s because she's your girlfriend. I was your best friend! I came before Eleven. It used to be Mike and Will but all it is, is Eleven Eleven Eleven, Eleven this! El that! You know the three times you called me was about El? Did you? Or were you so caught up in yourself that for once you couldn’t think about having a normal conversation! When’s the last time we had a conversation without you bringing her up once?” Mike stayed silent.
“Exactly,” Will said, standing to walk away.
“Oh come on Will that’s so unfair!” Mike tried to argue.
“Unfair?! You wanna know what’s unfair? Is that apparently the day I went missing is the day your life started! I guess I wasn’t needed anymore. I guess that day on the swingset meant nothing to you! If anything I felt like my life started the day you asked me if I wanted to be friends. And for once. once. I wish you would just feel the same way. But it’ll never happen. I feel like I used to know everything about you and now I barely know you. We used to be able to talk about anything. It used to be so simple. It’s like something changed. Is it my fault? Did I do something to you?” Will asked. Voice cracking at the end.
Mike stood there with a shocked look. Almost hurt. That upset Will even more.
“No! Don’t look at me like that! That isn't fair. You don’t get to act like a total asshole and then make that face when I speak up about it! You make me feel like I'm going crazy! I can’t-” Will was cut off by Mike slowly walking towards him and wrapping his arms around Will’s waist. Will almost melted at the touch but he didn’t.
“No! Mike! Get off of me! I don’t-” Will was trying to push Mike’s arms off of himself even though he’s always longed for this. But Mike’s arms stayed firm then Mike reached up to Will’s head and pressed Will’s head into his shoulder.
“I know. It’s okay. Let it out.” Mike said, in a soft voice. His “Will voice” as everyone called it. And it broke Will. He melted into Mike’s arm and wrapped his own arms around Mike’s shoulders. Basically going limp.
“I hate you! I..” He was cut off by another sob. He was shaking like a leaf.
“I know. I’m sorry. Let it out.” Mike said. Softly running his fingers through Will’s hair.
“You.. You make me feel things I don’t want to. That’s why I push you away. The truth? I really like you Will. More than friends. And I think best friends aren’t supposed to feel that way. So I bottled it up and hurt you in the process. I never meant to hurt you. Or anyone in the party. I just didn’t know how to feel. This isn’t an excuse for my actions. It’s a reason. But I feel horrible about it. I never wanted or want to lose you. Because I love you Will. God I love you so much, I have so many unsent letters for you. Confessing how I feel about you. But I never sent them, because I was scared. And I’m so sorry for that. I’m sorry.” Mike said.
It broke Will even more. He could barely breathe. It's always what he dreamed to hear. That Mike loved him the way Will loves Mike. But this isn’t a dream. This is real life. Will is actually standing here sobbing into his best friend's shoulder. Holding him like he would disappear if he let go. Will felt safe at this moment.
“I love you too Mike.” Will said. Barely above a whisper. Scared if he spoke any louder his voice would break. Mike’s arms tightened a bit around Will’s waist. It made him feel more secure. They stayed there until Will’s sobs slowly turned into hic’s then just sniffles. But even though Will has stopped crying neither of them moved. Mike still having his hand wrapped up in Will’s hair. Will wished he could stop time so he could stay like this with Mike forever. But then Johnathan came around the corner. Only Will saw him though. Mike having his back turned to him. Johnathan just smiled softly and walked back to the van. Another minute passed and Mike slowly took his arms away from Will. Will already missed the touch.
“We should probably go back to the van. Everyone is probably waiting for us.” Will nodded.
They walked back to the van together. Johnathan turned back to look at Will. Basically asking are you okay? And Will nodded his head and then sat next to Mike. Later on if everyone saw Mike looking beat red while Will peacefully slept on his shoulder. No one said anything.