Chapter Text
You betrayed me! You know I need you! You left me!
It was my choice, Master! The council didn't trust me, I couldn't stay.
Even for the sake of your Master?
The blue lightsaber illuminated the darkness around. Anakin swings his saber, the blade flying at Ahsoka from above in a chopping blow, but she dodges and grabs her own lightsabers.
You're selfish! You left my back exposed. I hate you.
Please, Master, don't.
Togruta begs. The blue laser is approaching her face slowly and confidently. In an attempt to defend herself, Ahsoka pushes her Master with the Force.
It was a pathetic blow, Padawan, I'm disappointed in you. You haven't learned anything, you're weak and selfish. You've shown your true nature.
Skywalker swoops down on her with punches that make Ahsoka's hands shake. A soft squeal escapes her dark lips when her Master's blade is an inch from her face, burning with its merciless touch.
Togruta jumps out of bed. Carried by her stumbling feet, she bends down in front of the toilet, spilling the contents of her stomach. Her forehead, like the rest of her body, is covered with a thin layer of cold sweat.
Ahsoka's eyes are red from burst capillaries. She runs trembling fingers over her face, trying to bring herself to her senses. Her whole body is shaking, like an engine running at top speed. Again this dream, again the battle with Anakin, whose face terrifies her.
Ahsoka washes her face with cool water and moves into the bedroom. The chronograph indicates the night time is almost the same as the previous time. Togruta, having straightened the blanket and pillow, lies back in bed. Stroking herself soothingly, she murmurs tender words addressed to herself.
"Hello, Ulon."
"Hey, Ahsoka, help me, hold this compensator."
"Where is the Q7?" Togruta holds his fingers on the compensator, holding it motionless while Ulon welds it.
"I sent him to diagnose the engine. Kriff it, I can't find the fault. Thanks."
Ahsoka straightens up, looking around the garage, littered with scrap metal, droid details, ships and the like. "Is there anything for me?"
"That swoop was brought in last night," Bufopel nods at the bike lying in the corner, "It stalls after a few minutes of work. They said they were going to pick him up tonight, so you have to deal with him in a few hours."
"Everything will be at its best." Togruta inspects the swoop bike, then reaches for a tool to remove the trim.
"You look particularly gloomy today. Has something happened?" Ulon looks at her significantly.
"Um, no, nothing. Everything is as usual. I'm fine."
"Hey, you know you can reach out to me, right? You've been working here for six months, I'm glad you're here. Thanks to you, my business is still alive. So come on, tell me. Did your boyfriend leave you?"
"What?" A shiver runs through Ahsoka, and her eyes almost fall out. "Of course not! I didn't have any boyfriend!"
"Then what? Usually my daughter was in the same state when all sorts of bastards abandoned her."
Togruta sighs resignedly, knowing that Ulon won't let go. "Look, it was just a dream, nothing more, you know? I'm fine, I'm not feeling bad. Thank you for not bothering me."
"I just want to help," Ulon says condescendingly, "Wait, did you dream about the boyfriend who left you?"
Ahsoka slaps her forehead with her palm, shaking her head. "No boyfriend left me," togruta says brokenly. She sighs heavily. "It was a nightmare. I had a nightmare, you know? The Pykes syndicate seized me and made me a slave."
"Oh, Stars, what a horror!" cries Ulon, clasping his hands. "Do you want to talk about it? Damn, it's really scary. I would tear their hands off."
"I readily believe," Ahsoka laughs softly, "With your physical data."
"Yeah, but where can I go without your little nimble fingers, skillfully managing all the equipment. I get the impression that the galaxy has given me the God of Mechanics. By the way, I didn't hear where you studied?"
"Uh, Skywalker Academy," Togruta replies, fidgeting.
"Hmm, I've never heard of such"
"It's not very popular right now."
"Skywalker," Ulon says thoughtfully, "Is a familiar second name, but I can't remember where I heard it. Bad memory for names."
"Help me, please, to remove this trim. Your huge hands will handle it better."
"Anything for you."
"Be careful, Ahsoka. Are you sure you don't want me to give you a ride?" asks Ulon, standing on the ramp of his old ship.
"Thanks, I'll get there myself. I want to walk a little. See you tomorrow!"
"If anything, call me. See you tomorrow!"
Togruta looks at the retreating YT-1300, and then steps in the direction of the cantina. The place stinks of cheap alcohol, there is an atmosphere of celebration, which in fact does not exist. She orders herself a ruby bliel, sits down at a distant table alone.
The crappy taste turns to sweet after a second, warming Ahsoka's insides. Alcohol is unsafe at her age, but she didn't give a damn about these rules. This is the only way to help her not to dream.
A twi'lek sits down next to her, already pretty drunk by the look of it, and apparently very confident. But he does not linger at the table, Ahsoka dismisses this drunkard, which is why he punches the table and disappears into the crowd.
The Force helps her not to get drunk. Ahsoka tries hard to ignore this vestige of a past life, but it takes much longer to get rid of it. Therefore, mostly sober, she goes home, but in a remote alley she sees pykes disturbing some person who does not have the strength and ability to stand up for himself.
Filled with a sense of justice that had lived in her for many years, Ahsoka approaches them.
"Hey, what's going on here? Why are you bothering this poor Gran?"
"It's none of your business, you scum! Fuck off!" one of the Rations hisses, pointing a blaster at her.
"Please don't," Gran mutters.
Ahsoka wrings Pyke's hand, throws away the blaster and kicks him at a colleague.
"What are you doing?!" one of them growls. A few seconds later, both pykes are already hurriedly leaving the alley, holding on to sore spots.
"Are you okay?" Togruta turns to Gran, who is frozen in amazement.
"Who asked you to get involved?!" he shouts. "Bantha poodoo, I almost agreed on a postponement! Go away!"
Gran pushes her with his shoulder, muttering something to himself.
"You should be thanking me!" Ahsoka mentally makes a note not to help this bastard anymore, as well as his kind. So that she would do such a stupid thing again. She's not a Jedi anymore, it's time to accept that.
Disappointed, Togruta plops down on a single hard bed at home. At least it's warm here, she thinks, remembering the poor people on the streets. She mentally convinces herself that she is not so bad, there are other ways that do not intersect with the Jedi.
"Hey, Ahsoka, your name is here!" Ulon shouts when Ahsoka is rummaging in the warehouse in search of a detail.
Togruta comes out and sees yesterday's customer, to whom she repaired a swoop bike, and next to him a man she does not know. Ahsoka wonders about the reason for their visit here. There could be no mistake in her actions.
"There she is!" one of them screams. "Oh, kriff, I'm so grateful to you. You should have seen how I left those losers with their mouths open yesterday!"
"Excuse me?" togruta mutters.
He holds out his hand to her. "My name is Nindo. Nindo Tondwar. I owe it to you for yesterday's victory in the swoop race."
Ahsoka shakes his calloused hand. "Um, I'm very pleased, but paying for our services is enough gratitude, I think..."
"No, no, no," Nindo interrupts her, "Listen, come to our club 'Mad Gundark' tonight. You'll like it. Racing, guys, high-quality booze, talking about engines. Please."
"Well, I don't even know," Ahsoka answers uncertainly, "If I have time, I'll come."
"Cool! 'Mad Gundark' in the area of Shaak Riders. We'll be waiting!"
Guys jump on swoop bikes and fly away as fast as they appeared here. Ahsoka, still puzzled, looks in front of her.
"Strange guys," Ulon states, approaching togruta, "Listen, I wouldn't mess with them if I were you."
"Did you have any doubts about that?" she grins.
"There is no doubt," Ulon throws up his hands, shrugging his massive shoulders - "I'm even glad that we have the same opinion."
"Don't worry, Ulon, I won't do anything stupid," Ahsoka reassures.
"You are wise beyond your years," he smiles, "Sometimes I have the impression that you are older than me. Who raised you like that?"
Togruta's smile fades with the last words. She turns away, disassembling the engine.
"A good man," Ahsoka declares with a sour face.
"Well, I would shake hands with this 'good man', but not too much," Ulon laughs.
Contrary to her words, Ahsoka finds herself in a "Mad Gundark" after work. She becomes convinced that Nindo was right in praising this institution. In any case, it's better than the cantina she sometimes visited.
There are young people everywhere, and there are also aliens. Booze is really better than pirate swill. She draws attention to a tattoo artist drawing some kind of animal to a guy. Togruta involuntarily recalls his own marks on his face, which many took for tattoos.
"Hey! TThis is a golden-hands Master" shouts Nindo, putting his arm around Ahsoka's waist, he introduces her to his friends.
Togruta removes his hand from her waist, not taken by surprise by the sudden change of scenery. Young guys are sitting around the table, some have metal parts, some have tattoos. Everyone greets her by presenting their names.
"Do you drive swoops?" asks Nindo, sitting shoulder to shoulder with her.
"Not really. Once I was really actively engaged in this, now I'm not," Ahsoka replies with restraint.
"Did you win a lot of races?" one of the guys asks.
"Enough to be good at it."
"Enough to smear you, Carlos," Nindo laughs. "Kriff, I like her!"
"Screw you, rider!"
"Why did you stop driving?" The girl with the metal hand asks.
"Uh, tired, I guess. I won too easily," Togruta smiles.
The guys around her are laughing.
"Try this," Nindo hands her a handful of sand-colored powder.
"Is that spice?"
"Come on, try it. It's even useful!"
Ahsoka hesitates, looking from the powder to her hands.
Suddenly the music stops, and a painfully familiar voice reaches her ears.
"Young people, everyone out! Now there will be a search!" announces a clone in red armor.
"Oh shit. Only they were not enough." Nindo hides the spice under the sofa, and together they go outside.
Got a damn, Ahsoka thinks to herself. A lieutenant of the Coruscant Guard checks everyone's documents and the presence of drugs. The queue reaches Ahsoka. The lieutenant stares at her for a few seconds, then demands documents.
"Ahsoka Tano," the clone states, "is General Skywalker's former Padawan. I didn't know you, Commander, could be here. What are the reasons?"
"Are you a Jedi?" asks Nindo, dumbfounded.
She catches the surprised glances of others.
"The reasons for my presence here, Lieutenant, do not concern you. I'm not a commander or a Jedi anymore. I haven't done anything illegal."
"Indeed," the clone grins, "You are right, citizen, but let me give you some advice, the people you're standing here with are illegal racers, often drug addicts, a person with your reputation doesn't belong here."
"I determine where and when I am. Thank you, Lieutenant."
Ahsoka can't see his face because of the helmet, but she feels his condescending gaze on her.
"Call me, Commander, if you need help. Please do not get into trouble. And I will not tell anyone that I saw you here," the clone hands her her documents and a link to his comlink.
"You didn't say you were a Jedi," Nindo whispers indignantly.
"It's in the past, I'm not with them anymore. I don't care what this trooper says."
"I think otherwise," Nindo mutters softly.
Master, please!
Ahsoka jumps up on the bed, breathing heavily. Togruta looks around, realizing that she is completely alone in her apartment and she is safe. Ahsoka straightens her nightgown, goes to the kitchen to drink water.
Suddenly the door opens and several dark figures break in.
"You shouldn't have crossed pykes. Beat her, beat her!"
Ahsoka is writhing in pain, lying on the cold floor in her own apartment, when the pykes beat her in her own apartment. Heavy blows fall on the ribs, stomach, lekku, montrals. She longs to resist, but there are too many of them, and besides, she can't get up.
They leave after a few minutes, leaving her alone with sick and bleeding small wounds. She is boiling with anger, which she has not felt for a long time, her whole body is shaking and aching. The desire for revenge wakes up in her, calls her to catch up with the offenders and pay for what she has done.
For some reason, the Light is eclipsed by the Darkness, and Ahsoka can no longer resist it. She opens herself to the Darkness, letting in the sweet pleasure of preparing revenge. Plans are already flashing through her mind. But for complete happiness, she lacks only one thing.