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There was something strangely peaceful about grading papers. Most of his colleagues weren’t fond of it, but Parker found that it was quite relaxing to just lose himself and focus on the task. With all the types of different students he’d had throughout his career there was never a boring moment whenever he looked over their work.
And as of late, it had been a blessing being able to get his mind off his situation at home.
“I’m back!”
Peter’s cheerful voice rang throughout the apartment, and it caused Parker’s heart to stir joyfully in instinct. He turned his attention away from the computer on his lap to greet his younger beaming counterpart.
“Welcome back.”
“I brought dinner~” Peter chuckled proudly, placing the box of pizza he had brought on the kitchen counter. “Got paid quite generously for my last photo session, so I wanted to treat myself.”
“Oh, sweet.” Parker removed his glasses and set aside his computer to join Peter by the kitchen, rubbing his hands eagerly at the enticing smell of cheese. “Pepperoni?”
“Hawaiian.” Peter shrugged apologetically, but that didn’t stop Parker from opening the box and grabbing a slice.
“Pizza is pizza.” Hawaiian may not be his top choice but Parker enjoyed it nonetheless. Besides, he knew it was Peter’s favorite.
“Amen to that.”
Against his own better judgment Parker watched how Peter grabbed the closest slice, licked his lips in anticipation, and took a bite. He moaned in delight as soon as he started chewing, blissfully unaware of the cheese dribbling down the corner of his lip to his chin. Parker was awfully tempted to reach out and clean it, but stopped himself as Peter took another bite.
Oh god not this again.
Parker blinked and snapped out of his brief stupor, resuming on eating his slice.
Could he seriously not spend five minutes in the same room as Peter without checking him out? Parker was surprised he hadn’t been called out on it, but then again, from the two months they’d been living together it seemed that Peter was naturally a little… clueless. At least when it came to interpersonal relationships.
Parker knew he was being so painfully obvious -not that he was doing it on purpose-, but it was hard to keep himself in check every single second he was around Peter.
In the beginning, when Peter was taken back to the wrong universe after helping their teen counterpart, Parker had absolutely no problem offering him a place to stay. Peter was a good guy, was stranded in a strange new universe with possibly no way back to his own, and the only person he could count on was Parker. It had been a no-brainer, plus the idea of having a roommate after so many years of living alone sounded fun.
But the harmless fun didn’t last long. One day Parker was merely enjoying Peter’s pleasant company and then the other his heart would suddenly race whenever he heard Peter laugh. He also started noticing how good looking Peter was, how easy it was to hang out around him, how natural it felt to be close to him.
Parker hated it. He felt like an insecure teenager all over again. It took years for him and MJ to officially get together, so to say he wasn’t good at acting on his romantic feelings was an understatement. It wasn’t very encouraging either that his only serious relationship ended in a divorce, so Parker had all those reasons and more to keep his emotions to himself.
But of course, it could never be that easy for him.
“Ah, that hit the spot.” Peter sighed contentedly and licked his fingers clean. “I’m stuffed. I don’t think I could take another bite, as good as it smells.”
Peter closed his eyes, sniffing the air.
“That smell- wait, that's not the pizza.” Peter furrowed his eyebrows in concentration. Parker felt his heart drop, watching as Peter leaned across the counter closer towards him. “It’s that smell again… the one I keep telling you about.”
“Smell?” Parker chuckled nervously. “I just smell the pizza.”
“No, no, it’s different. It’s kinda sweet? Kinda musky…”
While Peter was busy trying to find a source Parker conspicuously glanced down at his wrists, cursing inwardly upon seeing damp spots on the sleeves of his shirt right where his spinnerets were.
Crap.
“Are you sure you’re not wearing cologne or something?” Peter was much closer to Parker now, sniffing the air in his direction, and Parker hastily cleaned the leaking liquid with his sleeves.
“I’ve told you I don’t wear cologne if I’m staying at home.” Parker finished his slice with one final bite and swallowed a little too quickly just so he could take a step away from Peter. “Listen um, thanks for the pizza but I still got some papers to grade… I might stay up a little late so I’ll just go shower right now.”
“Oh, yeah, okay.” Peter leaned back to his side of the counter, scratching the back of his head in confusion. “No problem.”
Taking that as his cue to leave Parker turned around and made his way towards his bedroom, his movements a little stiff as he could still sense Peter’s gaze on him.
“I’m not crazy!”
“I know.” Parker reassured him with a shaky laugh.
When he finally made it to his bedroom Parker locked the door behind him, instantly pulling up his sleeves to glare at his wrists with frustration. A few drops of the unfamiliar transparent liquid were still leaking, but the skin around his spinnerets was at least starting to dry.
He still had no idea what was happening.
A few weeks ago, when his feelings towards Peter were at their highest and Parker had actually started daydreaming about him, his wrists had started leaking that strange clear substance. It was terrifying the first time it happened, and while for him it appeared to have no scent -or taste- Peter clearly seemed to be smelling it. The fact that it smelled good to Peter made it much worse.
Parker had been Spider-Man for two decades, and not once had this ever happened. This didn’t seem to be a superpower, but it was safe to say it was an effect from the spider bite. Why was it happening now though? And why was it affecting only Peter? On a few occasions it had occurred while out in public, and no one else besides Peter seemed to take notice of it.
The scientist in him was desperate for answers, so a few days ago Parker made a request to use one of the labs of the university he worked at as soon as there was an available slot. To his relief he had been scheduled for the next day, so he didn’t have to wait for long.
He already had a few theories on what was happening, but he wanted to be completely certain.
He hoped he was wrong though.
Me: Hey is it okay if you patrol for me today? I got kinda busy with something at work
TheAmazingPeter: sure!
Me: Thank you :)
TheAmazingPeter: get back home before it gets dark tho :T otherwise spiderman might have to save you from the bad guys again
Me: Haha that happened only once and I wasn’t in danger
TheAmazingPeter: yeah yeah :P
Parker put his cell phone back in his pocket with a fond laugh. That happened about three weeks ago and Peter was just not letting him forget about it. Even without his suit it was difficult for Parker to be in any danger against regular burglars, and while it was bothersome to deal with them since he needed to conceal his identity it was nothing he couldn’t handle. Still, he appreciated that Peter had swooped in at the nick of time and gave him a hand.
Parker had always been the one protecting others, so to have someone protecting him for once felt… nice.
But he was getting sidetracked. He sighed. This wasn’t the time for reminiscing.
After running a few tests on the samples he had brought with him Parker had been able to conclude several things. The liquid from his wrists was acidic, it wasn’t venomous, and it seemed to contain water, salt and other normal organic compounds. Nothing out of the ordinary, but there was still one more test he wanted to make.
Parker grabbed the last of his samples, already placed in a petri dish, and left it in the middle of the table. With slight apprehension he fished for two small plastic containers in his lab coat's pocket and placed them in front of him.
On one container was a small, male jumping spider, and on the other a slightly bigger, female jumping spider. Parker stared at them both with uncertainty. He had already gone out of his way to catch them, so he might as well give it a try no? It didn’t seem plausible, but the odds of him being correct weren’t downright 0%. That was enough for him.
Slowly he opened the container holding the female spider and let it out. For a few seconds there was no reaction, only the idle movements of its fangs, until eventually the spider jumped to the table’s edge and made its way down.
Parker let out a breath he didn’t know he had been holding.
He may be skeptical of his theory, but he was more scared than he would admit.
With shaky hands Parker proceeded to open the container holding the male spider and let it jump out. He swallowed anxiously, watching intently for any kind of reaction. At first the spider seemed to be taking in its surroundings, but its attention was quickly caught by the petri dish, and to Parker’s horror it jumped straight towards it and landed inside.
Oh god they were female spider pheromones.
Was his body trying to seduce Peter? Is that what it was?
Oh fuck.
Parker stood up from the chair he had been sitting on and paced around the room in circles.
Could it be linked to his desire of finding a partner? No... This never happened throughout the years he had been pining for MJ, and it still didn't happen during the time they were together. So why now? And why Peter?
He needed to calm down. There was no point in panicking; he had to go at it as objectively as possible and from there plan on how he was going to handle it.
He stopped walking and took in a shuddery deep breath.
Okay. There was a constant in all of this.
Peter.
What was the difference between Peter and MJ? The obvious thing was that Peter was male, but Parker had been around other men when his wrists leaked and not one of them reacted. The only other notorious difference was that Peter had been bitten by a spider, and just like Parker, he too attained spider properties alongside his powers.
So his body was able to exclusively attract male ‘spider-people’. Did that mean that these pheromones would have been detected by teen Peter too? The thought made Parker shudder. On a scientific standpoint it made sense that they would, but he did not like the idea at all of his younger counterpart possibly being sexually attracted to him.
That did beg the question though. If his wrists reacted to the presence of another male Spider-Man, why hadn’t they leaked back then when he was around two of them? Why did it happen until a few weeks in of him and Peter living together?
What happened in that timeframe that triggered it?
The sudden buzz in his back pocket brought Parker out of his train of thought. He took out his cell phone, noticing that he had a new message notification, and smiled upon seeing it was from Peter.
TheAmazingPeter: I’m heading out!
A soft laugh left Parker’s lips. He could hear Peter’s voice in his head while reading the message.
And then it clicked.
Parker widened his eyes with horrified realization.
His wrists started leaking when he fell in love with Peter.
Great.
Parker held his face with a groan of distress and slumped back down on the chair.
If he let it happen would the pheromones be strong enough to force Peter to respond physically? If they did, wouldn’t that be going against Peter’s consent? Parker would never forgive himself if Peter was pushed to do something he did not want to do, and if nothing changed, there was a high risk of that happening.
He had to do something.
He had to warn Peter.
But to do that… he’d have to explain everything. Everything.
As if Parker wasn’t distraught enough over the recent turn of events, now he had to admit to his feelings in order to protect Peter. There was no way that would turn out okay; he might as well mentally prepare for when Peter understandably decided to put some distance between them.
Parker ended up needing to collect his thoughts for longer than he had anticipated and left the university campus just as the sun had already set.
He was emotionally drained, resigned and defeated, going on his way with little to no rush because he was dreading going back home. Peter would be there, being his sweet amicable self, and Parker was going to have to look him in the eye and tell him how his body was trying to coerce him into getting intimate against his will.
The more he thought about it the more it mortified him.
“Hey.”
The man that had been walking in front of Parker suddenly turned around and blocked him from advancing any further. Parker glanced up apathetically, unfazed by his hand blatantly holding onto something inside his front pocket. Judging by the shape of the lump it seemed to be a knife.
“Hand over everything you got.” He murmured gruffly.
Parker sighed. “I got nothing of value on me. It’s not worth your time.”
“Shut your fucking mouth and give it to me.” The man hissed impatiently, making emphasis on his command by nudging his concealed hand.
Parker didn’t have the energy to insist any further and tried walking around him, but the man intercepted him by pulling his knife out and pointing it at his face.
“I’m not fucking joking!”
“Neither am I.” Parker narrowed his eyes annoyed, grabbing the man’s wrist in a brisk calculated motion that prevented him from moving his hand at all. “I don’t want any trouble.”
“Then you should probably stop looking for it!” A third voice chimed in with a little too much enthusiasm, and Parker’s heart somersaulted in his chest as Spider-Man swung down and placed himself between the two, making sure to snatch the knife and web it to the closest wall.
The presence of Spider-Man was enough to cause the man to scurry away, but rather than chasing after him Peter turned around and crossed his arms disapprovingly at Parker.
“Dude what did I say?” He berated playfully, and even with his mask on Parker could tell Peter was smiling.
“It’s not like I asked to get mugged you know?” Parker chuckled nervously, feeling awfully self conscious now that he suddenly had Peter in front of him. “I had it under control.”
“You say that, but you didn’t see the scary look on your face when you got that guy’s hand. I was a little scared you were going to break it. Long day at work?”
Parker felt his body go cold.
Don’t panic.
He cleared his throat, trying to appear as nonchalant as possible as he awkwardly rubbed the back of his head and avoided Peter’s gaze under the mask.
“Y-Yeah.” He nodded demurely. “I just want to go to bed already.”
And he wasn't lying. A part of him wanted nothing else than to ignore that righteous sense of duty that urged him to do the right thing to go collapse in bed instead. It would be so easy, but he knew the guilt would eat him from the inside.
“Then let’s get going.” Without much of a warning Peter wrapped an arm around Parker’s torso and brought him closer to his body. “I was on my way back anyway.”
“Y-You don’t really have to. I can walk just fine.” Parker attempted to push him away, but that only caused Peter to hold him much more tightly.
“So someone can try mugging you again? Not on my watch.”
Peter shot a web to a nearby building and Parker instinctively wrapped his arms around Peter’s broad shoulders right on time as their feet left the ground. In the two months they’d been living together this was the first time either of them gave a ride to the other as Spider-Man, and for some reason Parker thought when it happened it'd be the other way around. Going from one building to the other without wearing a mask felt incredibly foreign for Parker, but it wasn’t the lack of control or the suddenly dangerous free-falling that was making him feel so dizzy.
It was the intimate proximity. The firm yet gentle grip of Peter’s hand around his torso, the way his head seemed to fit perfectly under Peter’s neck, the closeness to each other’s body that allowed Parker to hear Peter’s heartbeat and breathing clearly.
His body buzzed with warmth, and panic settled in the pit of Parker’s stomach because this was more than enough to trigger his wrists again. He closed his eyes, taking deep breaths and trying to focus on something, anything, that wasn’t Peter.
Taxes. Economic inflation. Orphans. Famine. Global warm-
“Home sweet home.”
They landed right outside their apartment window on the building's fire escape, and a wave of relief washed over Parker as soon as Peter let go of him. He glanced down at his wrists. They were still dry.
“Thanks for the ride. Uh, the swing?” Parker scratched the side of his face sheepishly, eliciting an amused giggle from Peter.
“No problem.”
Peter encouraged Parker to climb through the window first with a playful bow, and Parker complied with a soft smile. Any other day such a gesture would have completely lifted his mood, but right then it felt awfully bittersweet.
“I know you said you were tired but you sure you don’t want to eat anything before going to bed?” Peter asked just as he climbed in right after him, closing the window and finally taking off his mask. “I can cook something real quick. It won’t take me long.”
The more Peter spoke the more Parker hesitated on actually saying anything. There was no telling if this would be the last pleasant conversation they’d be having together, but as painful as it’d be to possibly sacrifice their friendship Parker knew he was doing the right thing.
A knot formed in the back of his throat. Parker felt like if he didn’t say anything it’d suffocate him.
“No, that’s alright Peter. Thank you.” He dragged himself to the couch, and Peter frowned worriedly at the noticeable somberness settling around Parker. “I know this is sudden, but there’s something important I need to talk to you about.”
Peter blinked, his face contorting in confusion and concern.
“Is everything okay?” Peter asked warily as he sat next to Parker.
“...I don’t know.” Parker sighed, and although that answer wasn’t alleviating in the slightest Peter stayed quiet, waiting for his older counterpart to elaborate.
Parker took a deep breath.
“I’ve been Spider-Man for a long time now. I thought that after so many years of protecting New York I had learned everything about my spider abilities, but after some…recent events, I discovered other changes in me caused by the bite.”
Peter raised his eyebrows intrigued. Two decades of being Spider-Man and just now Parker had discovered something new about himself? How could that be possible?
“Did you get a new superpower or something?” Peter asked with more interest than concern, hopeful that he could also have whatever new abilities Parker now possessed.
“I wouldn’t say it’s a superpower.” Parker grimaced.
“Well, what is it? What triggered it?”
“I think you were the one that triggered it.”
Peter went silent, his expression blank but his eyes wide, staring at Parker with surprise.
Parker swallowed and looked down at his lap before continuing.
“I’m not 100% sure, but I think my body can subconsciously call for a mate the way spiders do.” He raised his hand and pulled up his sleeve, revealing the -thankfully- still dry spinneret on his wrist. “My wrists… they produce pheromones. They don’t seem to have any effect on regular people, but they do on spiders and- and on you too Peter.”
“The smell!” Peter gasped in realization, and strangely enough he seemed to be more excited than freaked out. “That’s what it was! Pheromones! So does that mean that other Spider-Mans would respond to it too? Including Pete? And how come it’s happening just now?”
“Maybe it would?” Parker shrugged uncomfortably, still not fond of the idea of the younger Peter reacting to the pheromones. “But I think it started happening around the time that I- uh, developed feelings for you.”
The excited glimmer of scientific curiosity in Peter’s eyes vanished, and whatever train of thought he was having came to an abrupt halt. His mouth went dry.
“...Feelings for me?”
Parker nodded hastily, but he didn’t dare make eye contact. He gripped his hands on his lap in a desperate attempt to not lose his courage.
“I don’t want these pheromones to force you to do something you don’t want to Peter.” Parker admitted with a defeated shake of his head. “It might be better if you went to live somewhere else on your own. I’d still help you with payments of course. We could stay in contact mostly through messages, but if that still makes you feel uncomfortable we can go our separate-”
“You like me?!”
There wasn’t outrage or disgust in Peter’s voice, but befuddlement. Parker turned to face him once more and was utterly confused to see what he could have sworn was hope in those big brown shining eyes.
Parker nodded timidly.
“What? But why?”
Huh?
Parker was getting lost. Was Peter more shocked that Parker had fallen for him and not of the fact that Parker’s body was continuously trying to chemically brainwash him into getting intimate?
“Wh- What do you mean why?”
“Why?” Peter repeated dumbfounded. “Dude you’re way out of my league! You’re so handsome and smart and cool and you got your life together! You can do so much better than me!”
There wasn’t a single ounce of doubt in Peter’s words. He actually, genuinely believed everything he was saying about himself, and he was trying to convince Parker to think the same. It made Parker’s heart sink.
When Peter had first called himself lame back at the Statue of Liberty Parker realized right away that his younger counterpart seemed to struggle with confidence and self-esteem. It was something that to this day Parker was trying to change gradually, complimenting and thanking him as much as possible, but he clearly had underestimated just how bad the situation actually was.
“What are you saying?” Parker berated him, hurt and indignant that Peter could say such things like it was the most obvious thing in the world. He skidded closer to Peter and cupped his face so he wouldn’t be able to look away from his eyes. “You need to stop being so hard on yourself. You’re amazing and I really like you. You’re so caring, so thoughtful, smarter than you think, stronger than you think. You may not see it but I do. I love your smile, your hair, your eyes-”
“My eyes?” Peter interrupted with an incredulous weak chuckle. “Your eyes are prettier than anything I’ve ever seen...”
They quietly stared at each other, mesmerized by each other’s tender gaze. Parker was completely captivated by the warmth and adoration colored in nothing but hazelnut, and Peter was immersed far too deep in the gentleness and care glimmering in blue.
A pleasant familiar smell appeared in the air, and Peter felt compelled to shorten the distance between them, only for Parker to meet him halfway.
Peter’s lips were soft, and although the kiss was brief it was chaste and heartfelt. It made electricity surge down Parker’s spine.
“I’ve been dying to do that for so long.” Peter sighed wistfully.
Parker wanted to give it to him again. To kiss him until their lips were bruised and their mouths went dry, but the sudden wetness on his wrists stopped him from giving in to his desires.
“Are you the one saying that?” Parker asked meekly, dread and fear lacing his voice. “Or is it the pheromones?”
“I promise it’s me.” Peter chuckled airily. “I don’t think your pheromones were the ones that made me dream the last couple of weeks of us being together.”
Peter had dreams about him? Parker’s stomach fluttered with joy at the thought, and suddenly all the anxieties and worst case scenarios that had been plaguing him vanished. A small relieved smile curved up his lips.
“What were your dreams like?”
An adorable pink hue adorned Peter’s cheeks as he laughed.
“Ridiculously cheesy. Hand holding, cuddling, that kind of stuff.”
Parker’s smile widened.
“That’s cute.” He kissed Peter again, and the surprised purr he got in response made his stomach coil. He pulled away just as Peter tried to search for his lips. “I’ve had those too. But to tell you the truth, those aren’t the ones I have the most often.”
The sultry look in his eyes said everything. Peter audibly swallowed.
“...You have no idea how good you smell right now.”
Peter chased after Parker’s mouth one more time, and what started as a kiss with only graces of each other’s lips quickly turned desperate and yearning as their tongues sought one another in between wet open kisses. Unwilling to let Parker get away from him again Peter pushed him down the couch and towered over him, trapping him in place.
Parker had gone so long without feeling the intimate and passionate touch of someone else. It had been years. His body had been aching it for it, and it was awfully obvious how badly he wanted it. His pants were already feeling tight.
Peter’s eager lips were drawn away from Parker’s mouth and wandered downwards to his chin. Instead of going to his neck however, Peter grabbed Parker’s right hand and pressed a kiss at the base of his palm, right above his spinneret.
“Finally.” He moaned breathlessly, and Parker felt the entirety of his body go ablaze as Peter licked and lapped at the opening on his wrist.
Parker cursed under his breath at the completely unexpected wave of pleasure that traveled all the way down to his groin. Had his wrists always been this sensitive? He was amazed he was finding out just now, but then again it was very likely that the pheromones were being of great influence.
“It tastes as good as it smells.” Peter swooned between breaths, licking and suckling the spinneret dry before changing to tend to the other one. “D-Does it feel good? Do you like it?”
The moans and whimpers forcing themselves out of Parker’s throat didn’t give him much room to voice a composed answer, so he nodded shakily in reply.
“Am I- am I doing good?”
The need in Peter’s voice made Parker glance down in his direction. Peter had slightly slowed down on his ministrations as he stared back, his brown eyes quietly begging him for vocal validation and praise.
“You are.” Parker rasped out, smiling down at him. “You’re doing amazing.”
Parker hissed as Peter resumed sucking at his wrist vigorously, and whether it was conscious or not Peter was so riled up his hips were now grinding against Parker’s thigh. Of course, the spandex of his Spider-Man suit gave away the throbbing erection hiding underneath.
It was happening too fast. Parker knew he wouldn’t be patient enough to go through the required preparation, but if he waited too long his own erection might turn painful. So in between praising Peter in murmurs he fumbled with his belt and pulled down his pants and underwear. He tried to reach out back to remove Peter’s suit as well, but after several seconds too long of struggling with it Peter momentarily stopped what he was doing to shimmy out of it, letting it hang just above his knees.
“I don’t want our first time to be like this.” Parker panted breathlessly. “So hurried and reckless… I want us to take our time.” Peter nodded in agreement, dazed but looking down at Parker lovingly nonetheless.
“Me too, I- I don’t think I can think straight right now.”
“You don’t have to.” Parker offered him a smile and grabbed Peter’s hand to guide it around both of their cocks. The contact made them moan in unison.
Peter got the message loud and clear. He jerked his hand experimentally, testing the sensation, and hissed wantonly as the mixed pre-cum of both of them served as perfect lubricant to slide up and down their shafts with ease.
Parker succumbed to the touch of Peter’s long fingers with a high-pitched sigh. He was already awfully close, and he knew it would be a matter of time before he reached his limit. Desperately he reached for Peter’s face and kissed him ravenously. They moaned against each other’s lips, and Peter’s hand quickened its pace.
In his delirious state of mind teetering so close to orgasm Parker had enough self-awareness to raise his shirt above his nipples to prepare for the incoming mess. It wasn’t that he didn’t want his shirt stained, but rather he wanted to get marked by the culmination of their passion.
“Just like that, you feel so good.” Parker chanted airily in encouragement just as they pulled apart. “Oh honey… so gorgeous, so amazing. I can’t get enough of you.”
A heart-stopping moan reached his ears, and the throbbing of Peter’s cock against Parker’s was followed by the pleasant burning of semen splattering on his chest. Parker managed to peek his eyes open to witness the expression on Peter’s face as he came undone. His eyes were scrunched closed, mouth agape, sweat glistening on his skin and cheeks tainted red. It was a face he could definitely get used to looking at.
“Parker-” Peter whispered blissfully, pressing their foreheads together, and that was what brought Parker to the edge.
Peter slowed his hand to a stop just as Parker came down from his high. His body went completely limp, his chest and wrists a sticky mess but a joyful smile pulled at the corners of his mouth anyway. Peter was awfully tempted to collapse right on top of him, but he knew better than to make an even bigger mess.
The heady fog caused by the pheromones began to dissipate, and they both shared bashful yet loving smiles.
“You think your pheromones will stop now? You got what you wanted.” Peter winked down mischievously.
“I actually don’t know.” Parker chortled weakly. “There are still a lot of things I don’t understand. We’d have to test it out some other time. Right now I just want to take a shower.”
“One step at a time, that’s fine by me.” Peter chuckled contentedly and stood up from the couch to pick up Parker in his arms, mindful of the mess on his stomach. “I gotcha.”
Any other day Parker would have asked to be put down, more than able to walk to the bathroom by himself, but he was too tired and too happy to complain. He rested his head against Peter’s shoulder with a dreamy sigh. Peter was holding him so effortlessly, and this being the second time he had been picked up in those long strong arms today Parker was starting to enjoy the feeling of safety that came with it.
He could get used to it.