Work Text:
Merlin lay peacefully in her favourite clearing, not far from the castle walls. It was rare she got an opportunity to actually relax. In the few occasions where she didn’t have work to do for Arthur, she was usually running round doing errands for Gaius or saving Camelot from some evil sorcerer or magical creature. Today though, both Arthur and Gaius had given her the day off (because Arthur really did care about her wellbeing, even if he would never admit it) and no disasters had yet made themselves known. So, Merlin had decided to fully embrace the day by doing absolutely nothing.
She just lay on the soft grass, closed her eyes and let her mind wonder.
She would never admit it to anyone, but Merlin had been having a rough time recently. From almost being arrested by Uther’s troll girlfriend, to being accused of sorcery by the witchfinder, and being responsible for Gaius being tortured, and then losing Freya at Arthur’s hand no less… Merlin felt quite exhausted.
Her life really had changed drastically in the last couple of years. Before Camelot, Merlin had spent her days quietly working on the farm and doing juvenile magic pranks with Will in Ealdor. Now she was saving the kingdom and its rulers on a seemingly weekly basis and had narrowly escaped capture and death so many times. It truly was incredible all that she’d done, and yet she still felt like she hadn’t achieved anything. Uther was still ruthless in his pursuit to destroy magic, Arthur’s views hadn’t changed, the kingdom was constantly being attacked and things felt like they were always slipping through her fingers.
Maybe she’d need to ask the dragon for some kind of timespan on her destiny, just so she knew she wouldn’t have to keep doing this for another twenty years.
“Even if it was twenty years, you know you’d stay anyway Merlin”, she said to herself. “That clotpole couldn’t get dressed in the morning without you.”
“Talking to yourself Merlin?” Merlin jumped rather comically at Arthur’s sudden appearance. “Should I be worried? I’ve always thought you should probably be locked up.”
‘You don’t know how right you are…’, thought Merlin. “I was just enjoying not hearing your constant nagging all day. Speaking of, you gave me the day off. I hope you’re not going back on your word,” she said, praying a training session wasn’t on the cards today.
“Relax Merlin, I just wanted to talk to you about something. And I do not nag.”
“Miss me too much already? It’s only been a couple of hours.”
“Oh please, the morning without your constant prattle has been the most peace I’ve had in years.”
“You miss me. I can tell,” Merlin smirked. Arthur rolled his eyes.
“If you’re not going to take this seriously, I’ll leave,” said Arthur, turning to walk away.
“Alright, alright, sorry Arthur. What is it?” Merlin patted to the space of grass next to her, and Arthur begrudgingly took a seat. They sat in silence for some moments, Arthur looking more and more awkward.
“Listen, Merlin… we… I’m a prince and you’re my servant…”
“Uh… Yes, sire,” confirmed Merlin, confused and dreading where this conversation might be going.
“So, we’re not friends. I’m not coming to you as a friend.”
“Well, that’s a relief. Who would want a friend who is such as prat?” quipped Merlin.
“Merlin,” Arthur warned, turning, so they were making eye contact.
“Sorry, sire.”
Arthur rolled his eyes again.
“I just want to be clear. We can’t be friends, and that’s not why I’m telling you this. If… If you ever think I’m crossing a line, and it makes you uncomfortable, you have to tell me. I’m a prince, and you’re a servant, and more than that, you’re a woman...” Arthur lost eye contact and started staring out at the castle instead.
Suddenly, Merlin felt very serious. Her heart started beating louder than usual, for reasons she’d rather not think about. What on earth was Arthur trying to talk to her about?
“And it’s precisely because you’re a woman that I’m telling you this, and that’s the only reason why.”
“Right… so we’re not friends, and I’m a woman…” Merlin summarised, feeling utterly confused and just a little nervous.
“So, what it all comes down to is… what I’m trying to tell you is that… and if you ever tell anyone I’ll kill you. Okay… well… I like someone, and I don’t know what to do about it.” Arthur said this last part so quickly Merlin barely heard him.
She was silent for a moment, feeling slightly breathless, before finally asking; “Who?”
Arthur took a while to answer.
“…Guinevere,” he said, finally.
Merlin let out a breath, not sure if she felt relief or dread at this admission. She decided it must be relief, because why on earth would she feel dread that Arthur liked Gwen…?
“Oh, thank God,” said Merlin, trying to lighten the mood. “For a moment there I feared you were about to profess your love to me.”
Arthur balked at her words.
“Merlin don’t be ridiculous. I’d rather marry a Wilddereon than even think of you in that way. That’s disgusting.”
“My thoughts exactly,” agreed Merlin.
There was an awkward silence.
“So… Gwen, then? That’s… well that’s great. Gwen’s the best!”
“Yes, she is.” Arthur said, very sweetly in Merlin’s opinion. She looked at him fondly.
“It’s just that… well there’s many things really. She’s a servant, and I’m a prince. My father would never allow it. And, I think she likes Lancelot anyway, so there’s really no point in me doing anything about it and I should probably just forget it and move on.”
Merlin sighed. “If you really believe that, then why are you asking my opinion?”
“You’re her friend, she might talk to you about this stuff, I dunno.”
Merlin smiled kindly.
“Have you talked to Gwen about this at all?”
“Oh, God no.”
“Well, maybe you should. Like I said, Gwen’s the best. And… you’re not so bad yourself.”
“Thanks Merlin, really boosting my confidence,” replied Arthur, sarcastically.
“What I’m trying to say is, you’re both good, attractive, understanding people. Talk to Gwen about your feelings. Chances are, she likes you too. And even if she doesn’t feel the same way, she’s not going to laugh in your face, because she’s Gwen and, as we’ve established, she’s literally the kindest person you’ll ever meet.”
“Did you just call me attractive?” teased Arthur.
“Arthur, if you weren’t going to listen to my advice, then why bother asking me at all?” Merlin said in frustration. Arthur grinned.
“Sorry, sorry. I appreciate your advice, Merlin. I’ll… I’ll talk to her.”
“All I’m saying is, you’ve faced far worse than Gwen and lived to tell the tale.”
“Yeah, you’re right. Thank you.”
“My wisdom knows no bounds,” said Merlin, haughtily.
“I wouldn’t go that far. You’re still an idiot.” Arthur retorted, giving Merlin’s head a prod and messing her hair.
“You know, if Gwen does like you back, you’re going to have to start being nicer to me. Unlike you, she actually is my friend.”
“Well in that case, I take back my feelings for her. The thought of treating you like you’re not an incompetent idiot is frankly mortifying.”
“Shut up,” said Merlin, grinning despite herself. Arthur was wearing a matching grin, feeling much lighter after talking to Merlin.
Arthur was supposed to have a busy agenda today. There were routes to plan, and nobles to talk to, and training practices to schedule. But sitting here on this hill with Merlin, away from the never-ending responsibilities of the castle, just chatting and laughing with his friend (who he cannot admit is his friend, but come on, who is he kidding?), he thought he might just stay here for a little longer. Just a few more minutes…
A few hours later, Gwen watched as Merlin and Arthur walked back to the castle together, laughing about something and chatting effortlessly. Usually, they both looked like they had the weight of the world on their shoulders, but right now they looked completely at ease. It was nice to see.
Now, Gwen would be lying if she said she didn’t have feelings for Prince Arthur. However, she was certain it would never work out. Not because of Uther, or her servant status, or even Lancelot. She knew it would never work because of a cheeky and charming servant girl by the name of Merlin. And Gwen was alright with that.
After all, Gwen really was the best.