Work Text:
I wish he was dead.
Thomas doesn't know where the sudden thought comes from. He never used to have such violent and visceral thoughts, but maybe a few years in captivity turn men into the twisted, unrecognizable form he has taken now. It's not completely unwarranted. His hatred for his father had grown at a steady pace all through childhood and solidified once he stopped living under his oppressive thumb. Although in hindsight, it seems idiotic to think he'd left his father's influence once he'd left his house.
Thomas was not the ideal child for someone like Alfred Hamilton, too soft, too opinionated, too forward-thinking, too lax.
"You'll never make it in the real world." he used to say.
And Thomas usual response would be "I'll change it, then." although never to his father's face, at least not after the first time.
The red mark on his face had lasted mere hours but the feelings it instilled inside Thomas had grown and festered, turning into a heavy weight at the pit of his stomach every time he had to spend even a second in the man's presence.
Despite his hatred towards his father, he's never wished a man's death. Not like this. Not fervently and with enough resolve to do it himself. Not that he could, being trapped in a life of servitude and obedience.
He's forgotten about the sudden urge to see his father dead when Joshua sits by him at lunch. The man is a reliable source of gossip in the plantation and Thomas' reprieve from his monotonous existence. Tall tales of pirates, the comings and goings of the plantation's personnel and local news make their way into Joshua's ears who relishes in regaling them with the stories every day.
Today he brings something Thomas was not expecting.
"I heard something interesting today."
"What is it?" Thomas asks, curiosity coloring his voice.
"I heard that the fearsome Captain Flint recently took a ship carrying precious cargo."
Tales of Captain Flint are always favored among the workers. The pirate captain has a reputation for being ruthless and almost unbeatable in battle. They say he's one with the sea and that dark magic protects him from harm. Thomas knows these stories are just that, stories, but still, he asks, "Isn't that what they do?"
"Yes, but this particular one was carrying one English Lord, one Lord Hamilton I believe," Joshua's tone is light, unaware of the turmoil he just awoke inside Thomas' head. "Any connection to you?"
"No" he says, hoping that his face doesn't betray his lie. People here know his name, but not the weight it carries, or his story. He hadn't learned the lesson of staying quiet soon enough, but he had learned it, and learned it well.
He asks,"Do you know what happened to him, to Lord Hamilton?"
"The story says that he fought back against the pirates who boarded their ship and was killed by Captain Flint."
Good, he thinks, but says "Oh, how sad. Do you think he was coming here?"
"What? Lord Hamilton? No, his ship was headed to Carolina."
Joshua launches into the telling of the rest of the gossip he's heard but Thomas can't seem to shake the feeling that has been growing since he heard Joshua's words. Relief, hope, bitterness, all tangled in a messy knot that's lodged in his throat. A few days ago, his father's death seemed like an impossibility; today, it's a reality and Thomas doesn't know what to do with himself.
He won't grieve, not like he grieved for Miranda and James. The man doesn't deserve it and Thomas doesn't have it in him to do it. He spares a thought to his mother but it doesn't last long. It's been a long time since he was the man who would and could forgive almost anything. Now his years in captivity have hardened him and turned him into a man a younger version of himself would not recognize.
The news give him more comfort that he was expecting, the knowledge that the man that brought so much suffering to Thomas' life is dead is like a soothing balm to the aches of his soul. It won't bring them back but he feels better than he has in years.
Thomas likes to reminisce about happier times. It gives his mind an oasis when his body is exhausted from the manual labor. When the days are hot and long Thomas likes to think about rainy evenings spent inside his London house with Miranda and James. Spending their time wrapped in blankets in their bed, trading kisses and book passages, sharing heat and red wine. Those are the memories that bring him the most joy, but also the biggest heartbreak. Because thinking about those days leads him to think about their loss and the betrayal that lead to it.
I wish you lost everything.
Peter's betrayal still stings and Thomas can't help but turn the thought in his mind. He had sold them out, without a single thought, he had turned his friends into pieces to advance his career. Peter had come crawling to Bedlam to confess and to ask for Thomas forgiveness. He raged and screamed and then he had granted it, knowing it meant nothing. In exchange, Peter had gotten him out of Bedlam. He'd been so close to being grateful, but then Peter had told him that he was only exchanging one prison for another. Whatever form of guilt he was feeling wasn't enough to release Thomas of his chains.
On the way to Savannah, Peter had told him about the post he'd been given as governor of Charles Town. He'd also shattered his heart. James and Miranda were dead. They were gone and he would never see them again.
At times he thinks about everything he lost and Peter gained. A respectable position in society, a warm and comfortable home, power, love. He can see Peter Ashe on his ostentatious house, surrounded by rich mahogany furniture and soft velvet fabrics, and his blood boils. He wants to see it torn to pieces, everything destroyed in a blazing fire or a raging storm. The smell of smoke floods his senses and brings Thomas out of his daydream. The workers get together around the fire after long days of work to rest and gossip. But the steady stream of words around him and the warmth of the flames don't settle his feelings. The conversation around him starts taking form.
"Charles Town was burned to the ground by pirates." Joshua says.
"Why?" someone asks.
"Because they are pirates?" someone else says, like it's the obvious answer.
"But pirates don't usually go hunting on land."
"The Governor there was notorious for hanging pirates, maybe they where making a point?" Joshua speculates.
At this point Thomas seems to realize what Joshua said and asks, "Did you say Charles Town?"
"Yeah, why?"
"Nothing." Peter."Just, you know if the governor survived?"
"No, I think Captain Flint killed him personally for daring to put him on trial."
"Captain Flint?"
"Yeah, I thought I said it before. They say Captain Flint and Captain Vane formed an alliance to raid Charles Town."
"Didn't you say--" he starts, but thinks better than to start Joshua on another rant about the ever changing nature of stories and gets up to leave. "Never mind."
It can't be possible. He thinks back to the time when he was brought news of his father's death. How he'd been thinking about the bastard and wishing his end. By some whim of fate, his wish had been granted but he hadn't thought much of it. It's happened again and Thomas can't help but think that two is already too many coincidences.
By the time the news about Nassau being razed to the ground by the Spanish reach the plantation, Thomas has been thinking about the island for a few days already. This does nothing to stifle the growing suspicion that his thought are somehow manifesting into reality.
He'd been berating himself for his idealistic ideas for the island. The pardons for the pirates were the best way to address the social issues that created them. Or so he had thought. The harsh reality of the world had hit him right in the face when he'd arrived in Savannah. The native population, slavery, and a myriad of issues caused by England instilling it's rule over the colonies were not to be solved with some pardons.
I hope it burns.
The thought had crossed his mind more than once, more angry with his own naivety and ignorance that with Nassau itself. Still the island was painful reminder of everything he'd gained and lost. Without his plans for Nassau he would have never met James, but now that he was gone, he wanted the island to burn.
And so, it had.
The absurdity of it all makes him snort. The ridiculous notion that somehow his thoughts had brought the destruction of Nassau makes him cringe. But the coincidence is undeniable and Thomas can't help thinking about the time he'd wished his father and Peter dead, only to get news of their passing a few days later. It's a coincidence, nothing more, he keeps telling himself in hopes that it's the truth. He can't manifest his thoughts into reality. Otherwise he would have never been incarcerated in Bedlam, he would have never been brought to the plantation. He would have never been separated from Miranda and James.
James.
It's stupid, he knows it is, but the thought still crosses his mind.
I wish I could see him again.
The plantation is buzzing with anticipation. There's word that Oglethorpe had taken money to house a pirate. A Captain, if that word is to be believed. Some whispers even say that it's Captain Flint. Thomas doesn't want to think about it too much. The though of coming face to face with the man who killed his father and who killed Peter Ashe is terrifying. The thought of thanking the man for murdering two people doesn't sit right with Thomas, but he can't deny the relief he felt when the news of their demise arrived.
A few days pass and the excitement in the air quiets until the doors of the plantation are opening and a two guards are escorting a new prisoner inside.
When Thomas turns the world comes crashing down. He drops the shovel and almost runs to James, embracing him tightly. He's real, Thomas is almost sure he's real. His hair is shorter than it's ever been, his eyes are as bright as the first time they met and the solidity of his embrace cements the fact that James is real and standing right in front of him.
Inside his head there's a voice that keeps loudly saying you got your wish.